Why We Broke Up

The book tells the story of the popular boy who falls in love with a "Bohemian" and narrates how their love story unfolds and how it slowly begins to fracture (the girl is the one telling the story). The book is good, but personally, there were parts that were too tedious with so much description or I felt it conveyed irrelevant things. Aside from that, it's fine. ?✨ (Translated from Spanish)

I love the journey, every detail that unfolds in this love story, the typical cliché, and of course, a story that everyone wants to know how it ends. Min is a somewhat "weird," bohemian, funny, and intelligent girl; she alone understands her own jokes. Min falls in love with Ed, the popular boy in school, the second captain of the basketball team. Who hasn't Ed dated? And of course, we all love happy endings, where the girl ends up with the guy and they live happily together. This story is not one of those. It is entertaining to read the development of the characters in this story, the emotions it makes us feel. I am very happy to have read the book and the way Min reflects her feelings and frees herself from a story where she was happy, realizing that Ed is not everything. I loved the story. (Translated from Spanish)

Review:

This book tells us the reasons why a couple ended their relationship, showcasing how they met, how their story progressed, and how they eventually broke up. It also includes several illustrations based on what is shared in the narrative.

Personal Opinion:

This is a book I didn’t expect; I thought it would include letters or poems related to the breakup, but it did not. It illustrates how an adolescent relationship can end as easily as it began. (Translated from Spanish)

How does Daniel Handler know so well what it's like to be a heartbroken, "arty" high school girl? Fantastically written. Wrenching. Love the Maira Kalman illustrations. She is brilliant as usual.

I liked the physical book maybe a bit more than the story. The heavy, high quality paper and beautiful art. I also appreciated the structure of the narrative, a long break-up letter that tells the story of a short relationship through the objects Min has collected and are now giving back to Ed. I found the story honest and moving, if a bit too literary at times. The long rambling lists had a great rhythm but disrupted the story at times. I also found myself wanting to check on the movies and other references. I figured they were invented but I also thought, well maybe I've just never heard of them. It got distracting but I think it also served the story that we are all new to these references, like Ed. Fully deserving of the Printz Honor.

Why We Broke Up was one of three Printz Award/Honor winners that I hadn't read. I do try to keep up with award and honor winners, so I put a hold on this one. It was a quick read, partly because of the number of paintings that show the objects Min is returning.

I loved Min's voice, which seemed fresh, believable, and funny. I especially liked the tipping point letter, where she talks about being different and how she's not (I'm trying not to spoil anything there).

Why We Broke Up is an epistolary novel, supposedly written by Min as she drives to Ed's house to return the box of stuff. I liked the format, especially the paintings. They helped to ground the narrative ina physical reality. It does require some suspension of disbelief, but Daniel Handler did manage to deal with my major problem ("This is seriously the longest car ride EVER!"). I think for people who have a history of liking epistolary novels, this is a great book. And for others, it might be a good one to take a chance on.

So overall, I really really liked this one. However, I did have some frustrations. There are a few spoilers below, but this really is not a book where spoilers matter. It's in the title, people.

1. For all that Min talks about this as the "end of Ed," she's clearly been hugely affected by her time with him, and I wasn't convinced that this would change just because she returns the box. Now, Handler may be making exactly that point, in a sneaky, meta sort of way. Regardless, it seems like hard knocks on Al who

2. I felt was under developed. Sure, the point is that he's the unexpected one, the one who sneaks up on you. But personally I felt that narratively speaking, he's NOT unexpected. Min might find him unexpected, but the reader knows he's there from the beginning. With that being the case, I wanted to know more about him, which is where I think the confines of the format create a problem. It doesn't necessarily make sense for Min to talk about Al to Ed, but without having more of a sense of Al, it's hard to be satisfied with the ending.

3. This also holds true with Ed to some degree. We know quite a bit more about what Min sees in him, but we never really know why there's a split between the nice Ed, the one who loves Min, and the jerk Ed. Again, maybe Handler is making a point here? that Min can never know and therefore we can never know? But it felt a little more sloppy than that.

4. Also, why the mysterious and baffling hints about Ed's mother? We never meet her, we never really know what's up with her and that strand just gets dropped.

All in all, I think it's a good book and one definitely worth reading. I'd be interested to hear if other people have similar problems with it, or if I just got frustrated.

Book source: public library
Book information: Hachette, 2011; YA (I'd say on the upper end of YA, but could vary).

A note: Daniel Handler is indeed the real person behind Lemony Snicket. Why We Broke Up is not A Series of Unfortunate Events, however. Forget the two are connected at all! (On the other hand, he did quote a Philip Larkin poem at the end of The End, so maybe they're not as far removed as I think.)

A story that will ring true for everyone who has fallen in love and suffered heartbreak.

Interesting concept, awesome illustrations, awful writing.

He got me. The title of the book says it, and I was still surprised. Another surprise was how well Handler writes from a teenaged, female perspective. Good stuff, and fabulous on audio.

I have a mediocre history with Daniel Handler’s books. I haven’t read much under his name, but I’ve read the Lemony Snicket stuff. And while I think the younger kids’ and picture books are hysterical, I was not a fan of A Series of Unfortunate Events. So I picked this one up with interest, as I was curious to read a straight Daniel Handler novel. Unfortunately, this did not leave an overwhelming impression on me.



The “artsy one and the popular jock fall in love” concept has been done before, but the way Handler writes this book, I can’t tell if he’s playing it straight or if he’s lightly poking fun at the idea. The book does read like a satire of these kind of relationships in fiction and how it probably wouldn’t work out well in real life. Except that the plot keeps getting played straight. Ed and Min have very little chemistry and have no real reasons why they’re attracted to one another, aside from the fact that they’re both out their respective social groups. But as we read through, it’s very clear that Min is heartbroken over Ed, because…? Although their relationship is relatively brief, we never get the intimate details of their reasons and actions. For example, Ed and his friends mention that it’s a big deal that Ed spends money on Min, something that he hasn’t done for his previous girlfriends. But the only explanation that we the reader gets is “[Min’s] different.” Okay, so what makes her different? That she’s not in a defined “group?” The weird thing is that I can kind of see why we don’t get to know the intimate details. It’s written as a fuck-off letter from Min, so obviously she’s not going to rehash details that Ed might already know. But it just left me confused as to what was going on.



There are plot threads that got dropped as soon as they’re mentioned and get picked up at random. Ed’s mother is sick and he spends a lot of time with his sister, but it’s never clear why or if it bothers him at all. Min’s best friend Al seems like a set-up for being her guy best friend, but of course we find out that he’s been in love with her for years. A driving plot point that repeatedly drops is Lottie Carson, a former film actress that may be living in Min’s town and is getting a surprise 89th birthday party. Except we never find out the truth and it gets dropped completely in the last twenty pages. (ETA: Apparently, I'm an idiot who missed a page dealing with this plot point.) Again, the plot reasons are understandable, but I felt cheated that a huge plot point never got resolved. And the reveal that Ed was cheating on Min with an ex-girlfriend really ticked me off as the ex seemed like a decent character and was very nice to Min, if a little blunt.



Again, the problem is all of the above feels like it’s satirizing these ideas and tropes that do show up in a lot of YA romances, but it falls back into playing them straight almost automatically. There’s a great example of this during a scene where Min has to meet with some of Ed’s friends at a party. She automatically launches into a very pretentious introduction of “My name is Min, after the Roman goddess of wisdom,” and one bitchy drunk girl tells her “No one cares.” If that had been in another YA romance book, that would have been the cue to hate on the latter girl and praise Min for being different. But here, it does come off as that would be the real life reaction. And then the scene falls back into playing the idea straight. I can’t tell if Handler was reining himself in or if it IS supposed to be a critical look, and I’m just missing something.



The writing is disjointed. It’s very well-written, but it doesn’t sound like a sixteen year-old girl was writing it. It feels like something Min wrote later in life after looking up Ed in old yearbooks or on Facebook, when she can be pithy and sarcastic. The artwork is excellent, but Handler takes the art and makes it redundant by explaining everything. There’s one really good piece with a torn condom package that just says a lot on its own, but then we get three sections dealing with Min’s deflowering.



As I’ve been saying, I’m not sure if I’m supposed to be seeing this as a straight YA book or a satire on the prevalent tropes, and the confusion killed the book for me. It’s got a nice gimmick, and good ideas, but Handler’s writing and tone does not fit the characters’ voices and falls short.

I expected more out of this one. The illustrations were a nice touch, and added a lot to the book. I like that Handler has branched out, but I'm not sure this was a huge success. I found the characters a bit predictable. But, I think teens will eat this book up. They just have to find it.

I wanted to love this because I adored Handler's Basic Eight, and because I love the point that high school love is usually not OMG perfect soulmates 4-eva, but I never cared about the characters. I ended up skipping ahead to the last third, just to find out what happens. (Spoiler: they break up.)

Min loves obscure movies.
Ed likes showers.

That's the premise of Why We Broke Up. Okay, so yeah there's a little more, like Min and Ed are dating. And obviously they break up (thank you, Daniel Handler, for putting a spoiler right there in the title; if you'd written The Sixth Sense, I bet you would've called it He Was Dead All Along). And there's also Al and coffee, math and basketball, and cubed eggs.

The illustrations are nice and the book is a very easy read, but the thing I most liked about Why We Broke Up was its ability to stir feelings of empathy in myself. This is a very realistic high school dating situation and I couldn't help but feel as I did throughout much of high school, angry that yet another decent girl was falling for a moron. Few things bother me more than girls and women who sacrifice so much for guys who just crap all over them.

I enjoyed Handler's clever usage of old movies and obscure products but felt gypped part way through when I realized they were mostly fabricated—were any legitimate? Handler is a witty man, but when you strip away the reality of the genius behind these references, the whole scheme falls apart. There's not enough left to hold it together. Min is interesting, but she's equally annoying and unbelievable. Al is believable, but there wasn't enough of him. And Ed—Ed likes showers. The language is fun at times and other times a chore. Overall, Why We Broke Up is a middle of the road kind of book. But it has pictures. And every breathing American will tell you that pictures alone make a book ten times better.

I liked this well enough, but wanted more from it. The drawings of all the stuff Min was returning to Ed were a little distracting--if it was meant to be the actual stuff, I think photos would have worked better. And I'm disappointed in the ultimate reason Min and Ed break up. Min gives so many small-but-valid reasons all throughout, but it's not any of those, exactly, or even a combination of any of them, but rather a whole different thing.

I do vaguely worry that it sets the stage for "he doesn't beat me/cheat on me/scream at me, so therefore there's no reason to break up" even when the relationship doesn't work for many other reasons. "He meets the basic requirement of human beings" isn't a compelling reason to date someone, and I worry that's the take-away message teen girls may get from this book.

(Blah blah works of fiction not morality tales blah blah fishcakes but it's hard to deny that teens DO take messages away from what they read)

**For a similar idea--a relationship and its demise told through STUFF--see Important Artifacts & Personal Property From the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morris, Including Books, Street Fashion, and Jewelry, by Leanne Shapton. Aimed at adults and experimental but a similar premise.

Congratulation, Mr. Handler, you wrote a book in the voice of a teenage girl and succeeded in crafting a narrative that sounds exactly like a teenage girl had written it. Unfortunately, there is a reason that most teenagers do not get published. This book was terrible reading: run-on sentences, fluffy overwraught descriptions, hideously applied and sometimes confusing use of second person narrative, and flat, repetitive dialogue of which the only redeeming quality was to break up the previously mentioned run-on sentences that often lasted for entire pages.

The back of the book states "Min and Ed's story of heartbreak may remind you of your own" but nope, nope it didn't, because I was never the world's blandest manic pixie dream girl, nor was I a one-dimensional, stereotypical jock, and I suspect that anyone who is not a movie character also might have trouble relating to either of these uninteresting protagonists.

Girl meets boy. Girl falls in love with boy. Girl loses boy and writes him an epic letter, with demonstrative exhibits, about why they broke up. I think Handler’s best as Lemony Snicket, and this book didn’t convince me otherwise, though the tone of desperate, half-insightful and half-self-deluding teenagerhood rang true.

It's been two weeks since I finished this book and I cannot get it out of my head. Not like when one feels the barbs of love sticking in them and releasing an intoxicating poison (that is probably life-threatening) but like the sad and angry pangs of regret, the frustration and remorse at the end of a relationship that REALLY should never have happened. Indeed, more than once I thought the words "What the hell was I thinking?"This is not strictly because of the book, it is because five days after I finished it was the first anniversary of my own horrible, horrible heartbreak. That was a relationship no one around me understood, a relationship that felt like the entire world to me, and one that ended in betrayal so great that I nearly destroyed my own life in the process. So yes, I can relate all too well to this book, even though I have never dated a popular sports star and I never will (they are really not my type, but trust me, "smart" guys can break a girl's heart just the same).A lot of books about romance end when the relationship does, but usually there's a bit of gladness. Better to have loved and lost, the cliche goes. That is the case sometimes. Sometimes. But this is the story of a relationship that really was best left to the imagination, the what-ifs, because its reality was too painful. Maybe Ed didn't feel that way. Maybe he did actually love Min; in fact, I really don't doubt that he did at all. (He was not a bad person despite doing many, many bad things.) But Min could've done so, so much better than him and she will in the future, so seeing her fall for a guy who was not right for her at all is plain tragic, especially when the reader knows exactly what that's like.In particular, Min's breakdown and rambling list of all her flaws at the end is extremely true to life. When the heart is broken, everything else breaks with it, first of all the person's own belief in their own ability. Min is clearly an intelligent girl who could probably devote herself to the world of film (indeed, as I wish to do the same I could relate to that passionate love as well); she did not in any way deserve to be broken like that.What keeps the book from being depressing, aside from its great sense of humor, is the knowledge that Min will recover from what has happened and find happiness in the future. She's way too smart not to. Indeed, any heartbroken individual will take solace in the book's underlying message that what becomes of the brokenhearted is so much better than they may be able to realize at the time. Even if their Ed, like my Jacob, never realizes the magnitude of how badly they hurt them.I believe my relationship with this book was definitely one that was meant to happen. It irritated me at times, made me happy at times, left me sad and frustrated when it ended, but in the end taught me more about myself and my heart than I ever expected. We should expect the same from our lovers as we do from our books.

Soooo hard for me to get into the voice of our main character. While the story is your typical teen coming of age and realizing what it is that really matters story, I was so put off by the voice (and the fact that they made up a whole slew of musicians and supposedly classic movies) that I had a hard time with it.

There are few enough beautiful books on the market these days that perhaps I should mention just how beautiful this book is first. The cover and many illustrations by Maira Kalman are enchanting. They are also integral to the story since they present to us first a box and then each of the contents of that box. Through the contents of the box Daniel Handler offers an epistolary account of a teen relationship: one long, long letter from Min to Ed detailing the mementos she collected along the way, from 5 October to 12 November. The lifetime of a relationship that is as deep in its way as any you might encounter.There are a number of remarkable things here. Min’s voice is captivating—hurt, obviously, since this “letter” is written after the break up, but fully capable of reliving the birth and growth of her feelings for Ed in such a way that they are entirely real for the reader. And Ed too, despite being a basketball star whose one saving grace (other than his charm) is his gift for math, is rendered lovingly. Or rather, the Ed we see through Min’s letter is attractive and enticing and just a little bit dumb. No wonder, perhaps, that a smart and creative and quirky girl from a completely different set at high school would fall for him when he turned his attention towards her.Min is a cinephile. She connects the events in her life to scenes in movies, usually old ones that play at the local repertory theatre. The movies and the actors and actresses all come to life for us, as they do for Min and her friends. But the wonderful thing here is that Daniel Handler has invented an entire alternate history of cinema in order to capture Min’s inner life. Brilliant. I started wishing that some of these were real films that I too could go watch.A five-week relationship between two teenagers sounds like a slight thing. And, I suppose, it is in many respects. But here it has been handled so charmingly, so lovingly, that you may find it, well, charming and lovely. And I recommend it on those grounds.

I read it in high school, and at that moment I felt very identified with it; it even made me cry, and I think that as a teenager I connected a lot with the story, and at the time I loved it. Therefore, I consider it a good novel for teenagers, but now, more than five years later, my perception has clearly changed, and if I were to read it anew in these times, the story would definitely seem somewhat obvious and predictable. But for what it is (a young adult novel), I think it is very well done and has an easy-to-follow story. (Translated from Spanish)

I started it and it's one of the few books I left halfway through. Very boring, at least up to where I got. (Translated from Spanish)

Toxic protagonists, a literal title for each reason why they broke up, easy to read with many illustrations but the story leaves much to be desired. (Translated from Spanish)

This book is unlike any other. I found it while browsing, flipped through the pages and was utterly captivated. I absolutely love the artwork done by Maira Kalman. And as luck would have it, the author didn't do too bad of a job either. This story is relatable on so many levels. Who hasn't had their heart broken before? This book made my emotions spiral out of control, from happy to sad to angry and back to happy. Such a wonderful rollercoaster.

A truly refreshing and honest and non-glamorized view of teenage romance. How quickly you fall in love and how stupid and naiive everyone is about it. And Handler's character had a lot of beautiful, interesting and refreshing ways to describe things. I also really enjoyed that nowhere in the novel was the idea of teenage love dismissed as not actually being love. Sure, you grow up and into a bigger love but that doesn't make teenage love any less real.

High school students Min and Ed have broken up, and Min is dealing with the breakup by sending Ed a long, long letter and a box full of all the trinkets she saved from their relationship. She explains each item in the box to him, along the way detailing their whole relationship and why it fell apart.I like the style this book is written in -- the extended letter is tough, but Handler makes it work for the most part. The prose is well written while also managing to maintain a quality of believable teenaged expression; in fact, I'm quite impressed by Handler's ability to convincingly write as a teenaged girl. In addition, there's an almost cinematic feel to the writing style at times, which is appropriate considering Min's obsession with old-time movies and film in general. The pictures are an interesting inclusion although not necessary to make the plot understandable. All that being said, however, this is a book that really feels like a book for teens. I've read quite a few YA books (and children's books) as an adult and enjoyed them, usually because I felt there was a bigger story being told beyond the basic plot. This book though is a very high school relationship centric book with no bigger picture beyond that high school relationships don't last forever. I'm sure teens will love reading something that resonates with them but I'm a couple of decades too old for this particular title.

Handler does an excellent job of developing Min as a character, revealing her emotions and psyche. And I think this rings true--the situation, how a relationship like this happens and feels in high school, the sacrifices you make, warning signs, etc. Some may find Min's narration annoying. I got tired of hearing movie plots, and you can get lost in her run-on/stream-of-consiousness narration. It was a little hard to believe min and ed getting together at all they're so different.

In this ode to first love and it's aftermath, Daniel Handler—aka Lemony Snicket—pairs up with his friend, illustrator Maira Kalman to tell the story of modern love gone awry. Min (for Minerva) Green is known as an "arty" girl, who hangs out with equally arty friends and has a passion for old films. One day as they are celebrating her best friend's "Bitter Sixteen" party, jocks Ed Slatherton and his buddy come crashing the party. Min can't refuse a date from Ed, the very handsome co-captain of the basketball team whom she would never have imagined would have ever set eyes on her. Her friends disapprove and his friends can't understand what he sees in her, but Ed claims he likes her being "different". Min brings Ed to the repertory cinema to see old movies (all convincingly made up by Handler), and though Ed doesn't really get it, he's willing to play along when Min decides they must throw and 89th birthday party for her favourite film star. The story is told by Min in a letter to Ed following their disastrous breakup. This is no Hallmark romance story, and these kids are dealing with real issues which include numerous gorgeous ex-girlfriends and sex as a foregone conclusion. With her letter, Min is returning a box of memorabilia to him, filled with items she's collected over their brief romance, from movie stubs to elastic bands, rose petals, beer caps, a dish towel, and more which Kalman has illustrated throughout the book. An interesting way to present a story we're all familiar with and which inevitably brings us back to our own first romantic experiences and crushing disappointments. I don't know that I'd want to have my teenage daughter reading this book considering the sexual content (Min and Ed have frequent "everything but" make-out sessions before she surrenders her virginity to him), but it might be a good way to open up a conversation about self-respect, being different and how to handle pressure to have sex.

Before reading this novel, I read a couple of other reviews that thought the book was too melodramatic or angsty. Now that I've read Why We Broke Up, I can see their points, but I have to say that the melodrama was intentionally and well done to create the world inside Min's sixteen-year-old mind. And Handler's writing was so skillful that none of it seemed over the top until I finished the book and thought back to everything that happened. While reading, I was in Min's head, and because she didn't find any of it histrionic, neither did I.The story line itself is quite cliche. Two teenagers from different social spheres meet by chance and take a liking to each other. They start dating, to the disapproval of their friends and parental units. Ed is the co-captain of the basketball team who enjoys weekly Bacchanalian bonfires with his friends, and Min is... different (not "arty") in that she and her friends love to plan unique parties like a "Bitter Sixteen" party with a "huge 89 percent cacao dark chocolate cake in the shape of a big black heart so bitter we couldn't really eat it" (pg. 9). The book itself is a long-winded note that Min writes to Ed recounting their relationship after they eventually break up.The way Handler tells the story is bold and experimental. Min's the narrator, and her stream of consciousness draws the reader not only into the story, but also into the mind of a sixteen-year-old girl who "falls in love" with a cute boy who she sees as the person she wants him to be rather than the person he actually is. Bad judgement, of course, ensues. To some extent, Handler drew me into the teenage mode of thinking once again through Min. Only when I finished the book did the fog clear and I realized - Min and Ed only dated for a month and a half. Six weeks. And the book only describes a few dates, broken up into sections so it seems like more. And then it takes Min another month to be "ready" to forget about Ed, though to do that she writes this book-length letter detailing the significance of each item in a box that represents their relationship. How do you even accumulate a whole box-worth of stuff from a six-week long romance?But that brings me to the second unique and interesting aspect of Why We Broke Up - the writing is interspersed with fantastic illustrations of each item in Min's (soon to be Ed's) box. My ARC edition didn't have all the illustrations yet, and none in color, but I still enjoyed the imaginative scrapbook style.Most impressive was how well Handler captured the inner workings of the mind of a teenage girl. How did he do that? The following passage, for example, looks eerily similar to something I might have written in my journals as a teen, not the details, but the self-loathing tone: "I like movies, everyone knows I do - I love them - but I will never be in charge of one because my ideas are stupid and wrong in my head. There's nothing different about that, nothing fascinating, interesting, worth looking at. I have bad hair and stupid eyes. I have a body that's nothing. I'm too fat and my mouth is idiotic ugly. My clothes are a joke, my jokes are desperate and complicated and nobody else laughs. I talk like a moron, I can't say one thing to talk to people that makes them like me, I just babble and sputter like a drinking fountain broken. My mother hates me, I can't please her. My dad never calls and then calls at the wrong time and sends big gifts or nothing, and all of it makes me scowl at him, and he named me Minerva. I talk sh-t about everybody and then sulk when they don't call me, my friends fall away like I've dropped them out of an airplane, my ex-boyfriend think I'm Hitler when he sees me. I scratch at places on my body, I sweat everywhere, my arms, the way I clumsy around dropping things, my average grades and stupid interests, bad breath, pants tight in back, my neck too long or something. I'm sneaky and get caught, I'm snobby and faking it, I agree with liars, I say whatnot and think that's some clever thing" (pg. 337).And she goes on for another half a page. That's what it feels like to be a teenage girl. Not all the time - that would be ridiculously tiring - but in certain unguarded, insecure moments where nothing is right.Why We Broke Up is a quick, yet powerful read. Min is melodramatic, yes, but she is a sixteen-year-old girl swept up in emotion, so a little angst comes with the territory. If you can overlook the teenage drama and the cliche plot line, you'll appreciate the fresh voice Handler brings to the page, and the unique structure of the text paired with Maira Kalman's illustrations. Overall, I recommend Why We Broke Up as piece of mixed-media artwork - text that paints a picture and illustrations that tell a story.

Min is a film buff. Her new boyfriend is a jock. But everything seems ok, until she discovers that it actually isn't. Her breakup letter takes the reader through the entire relationship, from happy beginning to messy end.

I picked this book up because I wanted to see what "Lemony Snicket" writes when he's not writing for young children. It was an interesting idea, but due to the profanity and the references to sexual activity, I'll be passing it on to our high school instead of finding a place for it on our library shelves.Imagine you kept a box of memorabilia from a non-platonic relationship...from the start to the finish. This is what Min has done, and now that she has broken up with her boyfriend Ed Slaterton, she decides to return every item in the box, and she provides an explanation of the significance of those items, which makes up most of the text of the book, why we broke up. I found it entertaining to look at the picture of the item, and then read how that item factored into the story.Unfortunately, I think most students will be bogged down by Min's references to films and will find this detracts from their enjoyment of the story.