Power in the Spoken Word!

CHAPTER 1

MISSION

A promise to provide you a professional quality in caring, to meet the quality of endurance in relationships and in marital life, and to learn how to provide for your needs and for the people around you.

The Core Value

You mentioned something, which has never happened and might eventually happen, because you had already mentioned it and pronounced it in favor of yourself. Then after you say bad things and when it happens, you believed God does not exist, whereas you had forgotten that you have already pronounced it against your wish.

The adage says ‘what goes up must surely come down’, therefore whatever you think will surely happen to you. Once you say it, it will come to being. Stress is a wonderful thing, while aggravation is the key to happiness. You need to find yourself in a situation where you are desperately short of resources as to know how to manage your words! For example, the sentence ‘God is nowhere’ can be read as ‘God is no here!’ What about that?

You are making smart moves and wise choices. See what you need to see and respond accordingly to your wish. But suddenly, you begin to doubt yourself because of little things that just happened to you and your partner, and then you need something badly. It’s very difficult—indeed, well-nigh impossible to imagine that the acquisition of something you need would bring anything less than satisfaction, and you begin to use negative words against your wish such as the following:

Why me?

Where is God?

What have I done that this happened to me?

I never would have done this or that?

What have I done wrong?

What is going wrong?

Do I deserve this?

I shouldn’t have told him!

All these questions would remind you eventually of what statement you had made before something happened and how you reacted then. No matter what situation you find yourself in, think positive and be assertive.

Communicate with your partner with full confidence and respect, understand how you will have no fear in your partner and not be afraid but give full respect within the family, friends, clubs, society, and with your parents, respect the confidentiality and individual needs and respond sensitively to the friends of your partner and visitors within your family, be very careful with your staff in your various offices.

Your environment is very important, and you should maintain a caring, safe, and appropriate environmental sanity for yourself, your partner, and the people around you.

Health awareness is important. Watch what you eat, and watch what you provide for your partner and children within your house; you should be able to provide health awareness to other people in the society in which you live. Give the best healthcare and provide the best meal within your house as to keep your husband in the house and for him to give you the best facilities you need at any time and when you need them—all days and nights.

Learn more every day. It is not necessary that you should go to college or university, but you can learn within your environment and your locality every day as you are coming in and out, ready to learn. Provide facilities for your needs and your children, and provide equal access to your children and staff. If you are the boss in your office, give your staff the chance to develop in order to provide the quality of services you require.

Attain a qualification, you can learn by going to college or university so as not to lag behind, but make up your mind to learn something that you can rely on in future, something that can make you look presentable in the society and in the presence of your partner. The moment you look inferior, mark you, you will definitely lose your man or your woman, but before you know, he/she might have got someone whom he/she thinks is presentable in the society.

‘Beauty is nothing, but what you can make up within your beautiful face is what is important and that will make you live forever.’

Maintain the quality service within you, and provide continuous quality service by learning every day. You will be an expert with confidence, competence, and commitment through the trust in which you and your partner built. Learning has no end; a commitment to enhancing the trust activity in terms of quality and quantity of research could be lay out with you and your partner. Never sit down in one place, as there is no success without effort.

Avoid buying takeaway, especially if you have a large family, but try as much as possible to get something cooked at home, and satisfy the needs of your partner and your children at all times.

Resources, among everything, are very, very important, and so these should be used to maximise the quality of care you provide to your children, partner, friends, and relatives alike. It is also important to recognise the necessity of taking good care of everybody around you, and not only of your partner. By doing this, the appropriate things will be put into right places at the right time.

CHAPTER 2

PITFALLS AND SWIMMING IN SIN

Benjamin, a friend of mine, had his fiancée coming up to him one day and saying, ‘I want an open relationship so that we can both go out and meet someone else to have sex with.’

He looked stupid hearing that from a woman whom he thought he loved! But that is what she wanted, and my friend couldn’t believe it.

He asked again, ‘Julie, do you mean we should go out and sleep with other people while we are still in relationship?’

She said, ‘Yes! I think that would make our relationship stronger.’

‘Even though I love you, you still want to sleep with someone else apart from me?’ Ben asked.

She said, ‘Ben, I love you, but I fancy other men, and I want to sleep with them.’

Ben became mad, and he didn’t know what to say!

Ben was worried and said to Dayo, ‘I am crushed by this statement. What can I do? I am afraid of losing this lady. We have been together for seven years. I have put all my resources on her to educate her and build her the way she is today, and now she is telling me that she wants another man in bed with her! The trouble is that she would simply sleep with other men even if I am not doing the same! I don’t understand where she got this idea from and what is going to happen now.’

Dayo replied, ‘Ben, love and commitment to the other partner is to prevent them from lusting and be led astray, but the love that your fiancée has for you at the moment is not falling in the same category. If she wants to sleep with other men, I can’t exactly say if she has got someone in mind in particular or if she just wants to go around sleeping with everyone that she fancies. By asking for your permission to have an affair outside while she is still having you, I can’t understand how she is trying to justify this. As far as I know, this is not going to make your relationship any stronger.’

But Ben didn’t want to lose the girl because he had invested so much in her, and he had hoped they could be together. No one could say what was going on!

‘When you are in relationship and never know where you are heading to, never say never, but don’t do so much for the woman whilst you don’t know where you are going, and don’t put so much of your resources on her. If she thinks you are stingy, let her think that, but give her the best when you are happy and let her know that you really care for her as much as you want her for life. Moreover, there are some other things that you need to take into consideration, such as sanity and self-respect, sexual health, and the possibility of contracting sexually transmissible diseases from others. Why can’t she think about these before she comes to you for suggestions?’

Ben then told his friend to tell her that he was not ready to go along with her in that respect and that she was free to follow her wishes.

Dayo said to Ben, ‘If you leave her, perhaps you will see her for what she is as a woman, one who really cares for herself or for others as well.’

In accordance to the new observation, over four million people in this country choose to live together rather than get married, and six in every ten children are born out of wedlock. This is because most people assume that partners in a long-term relationship have the exactly the same rights as those who married, which is not true!

The term ‘common-law husband or wife’ is not highly recognised by the law anymore, and if you live with a man for thirty years, it doesn’t mean that you will automatically get his wealth when he dies. If he eventually does not make a will, you will get a very raw deal, because you are not married to him, and there is nothing anyone can do about it.

Living together without being married is very common nowadays, which can get anyone into a big problem, financially and legally, with a big headache. There may be some hints for you in avoiding a painful brush with officialdom in the event that you and your partner go