From Monologue to Dialogue: Creating dialogue from a horizontal leadership perspective. A handbook for leaders

Table of Contents

About this book

Dialogue – Thoughts from Adriaan Bekman

The fundamental position of horizontal leadership

Acting in two different spaces – A contribution from Hans Ruijs

The capacity to enter into dialogue

The four fundamental psychological positions that I can adopt

The perception and construction of reality in the context of communication

The principle of intention and effect (sender-receiver model)

Preparing for a meeting

My dialogue partner – RUTH

Sharing (key qualities of coaching and inspiration)

The magic of the pause

The art of active listening

The art of asking questions

The essential features of coaching

Coaching by creating space

Coaching by listening

Encouraging learning processes

Coaching by setting the next learning step

Exchanging ideas within a coaching approach

Conducting a feedback interview

The confrontational I-statement

Possible stumbling blocks and how to avoid them

Conducting a progress review

The essential features of inspiration

Getting your employees on board with change

Conducting a motivational interview

Reasons for resistance to a planned change

The flow of a motivational interview

Interview structure

Clear and fair negotiation (key qualities of steering)

The essential features of management

Steering by making decisions

Steering by creating a framework

Steering by sparking impetus

Fact-based negotiation

Definition of negotiation goals according to Harvard

The four negotiating principles according to Harvard

Clear and fair intervention (key qualities of intervention)

The essential features of intervention

Communicating bad news

Conducting a termination meeting

Conducting a critical appraisal

Conducting a conflict resolution meeting

Afterword

List of references

About this book

Traditional vertical organisational forms and management structures are no longer usable. Work processes have become highly complex, as has the process of efficiently orientating them towards the customer and inspiring employees to take on these tasks. A horizontal approach frees up the creative potential of people within organisations. It allows leaders to involve employees in designing work processes that relate efficiently and effectively to the customer.

The Institute for Human and Organization Development (IMO), of which I am a member, is currently researching across nine countries into how a horizontal approach can be implemented and experienced within organisations. In doing so, we have recognised that three key issues are crucial in order to successfully and sustainably shape and develop an organisation, regardless of cultural differences (Switzerland, Holland, Finland, Germany, Italy, Israel, Brazil, Russia, China). It is vital to carefully sustain complex processes, to conduct clear, transparent, open, and honest dialogue between all levels of the hierarchy and to always consider the biography of the people in an organisation as well as the biography of the organisation itself.

This book focuses on the dialogue between you as a leader and your team members, superiors, and colleagues.

In my capacity as a trainer and consultant, I have been intensively dealing with communication for almost twenty years. During this time, one thing has become abundantly clear to me. Communication models and methods are only effective when your own position allows dialogue to take place on an equal footing. This may seem perfectly obvious to you. However, what happens if the other person reacts unreasonably, dismissively, or even abusively? It can be a challenge to maintain equilibrium in these situations. However, as soon as we abandon this horizontal approach, we abandon the possibility of appreciative, respectful communication. This means that I have to seek genuine dialogue among equals in every conversation, no matter how strenuous and laborious this may be. On the one hand, I have to disclose my needs, wishes, and expectations. On the other, I have to show respect for the other person through active listening and asking questions. If I successfully attain this inner position, I will create a space in which my counterpart can also disclose their wishes, expectations, needs, hopes, and fears.

In ‘The Horizontal Leadership Book’, IMO founder Adriaan Bekman describes four key qualities that are necessary for this kind of leadership. This book will use these key qualities as a basis in examining related discussion types and methodological structural proposals aimed at supporting meaningful dialogue among equals. The methods described will be underpinned by practical examples. At the end of each chapter, you will find some specific questions designed to help you reflect on your communication style.

With this book, I am inviting you to reflect on your own communication and explore which methods and models could help you to engage in horizontal dialogue.

Dialogue

By Adriaan Bekman, founder of the Institute for Human and Organization Development (IMO)

Many years ago, back when I was a young father, I loved making toys for my two daughters. I made a wooden dolls’ house, little tables and chairs, and other things. Since I had very little experience in making things like these, I tried to work out how to make toys that would be fairly robust and not fall apart immediately. I soon realised that my designs were actually not very robust. So I went and got a hammer and nails, and tried to make the toys stronger. Before long, I saw the shortcomings of this approach. I realised that something more dialogical would be more effective. I could see that I hadn’t really thought before I acted. I started a dialogue with the toys, asking, ‘what do you need? What could make you stronger?’. And I shared these questions with other people to find out how to improve my construction.

In my work as an organisational developer, I have found that organisations often use force to create constructs by exploiting hierarchical authority, which is often associated with cumbersome and complex structures. Effectively cooperating in open dialogue and supporting each other in finding the next step in the process is no easy feat.

When we cooperate from a position of ‘boss vs. underling’, only very limited dialogical cooperation is possible. All too often, this turns into one-way communication in which the superior makes decisions about the subordinates.