The Ladder of Love in Marriage

Shaikha AlAbry

COPYRIGHT NOTICE

Copyright © 2020 by Shaikha AlAbry

Edited by : Colton Allen 2020

Cover Design by : Shaikha AlAbry

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.

For permission requests, write to the Author /Publisher; email: [email protected]

LEGAL NOTICE AND

DISCLAIMER

This is a nonfiction book. It is designed to provide marriage relationship information and understanding about how to avoid unnecessarily divorces.

It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged to render any type of psychological, legal, or any other kind of professional advice.

Although the author has made all effort to ensure that the information in this book is correct and based on her own experience and the experience of those she met online and offline, friends and family, at the end of the day the reader has to do their own work to make a relationship work.

The content of each article is the sole expression, experience, and opinion of its author.

No warranties or guarantees are expressed or implied by the publisher’s decision to include any of the content in this volume.

The author shall not be liable for any physical, psychological, emotional, or commercial damages, including, but not limited to, incidental, consequential, or other damages.

Our views and rights are the same: You are responsible for your own choices, actions, and results. The main aim of this book is to strengthen and save marriages and avoid the number of divorces that are on-trend for just a little misunderstanding.

DEDICATION

To the first man, I ever loved, the first man I was inspired by, the man that I learned true love through his kindest treatment to my mom, the man that treated my mom like a queen - My dad. He was and still is my hero, he is not in this world anymore, but he made sure to leave behind the greatest power of kindness in me.

To the first woman, I ever loved, my best friend, a woman that I could talk to about anything without fear, and she would listen without criticizing me - My mom, she supported, trusted, and taught me to be strong, she is not here anymore, but she made sure to leave behind a strong daughter.

To four people, who are the greatest gift from my Lord, the kindest people I have raised, they are grown up, I cannot carry them in my arms anymore but I carry them in my heart wherever I go – My children, I am not just a parent to them but I am their best friend,  they are incredibly supportive in everything I do.

To the man that I met after a lot of pain, and I thought I am done with falling in love again, loving a man is a pain, but he came into my life and changed my thoughts, he made me believe there are still good men, they are few and he is one of them - My soulmate, my husband, who stood by me in this work, supported and encouraged me to pen my thoughts-

Thank you Darling.

MARRIAGE IS A SIGNIFICANT

COMMITMENT IN LIFE

Introduction

Divorce is among the most painful experiences, especially if you are married to someone whom you really love, and you have dreamt to spend the rest of your life with.

Staying married to someone you love is a dream of everyone, but sometimes divorces happen out of our control. And that is where this book comes in handy, to help us stay focused on our marital relationships.

Every marriage with true love should not think of divorce as an option just for a mistake or misunderstanding.

Every marriage that involves children should avoid even considering divorce.

In marriage, there will always be ups and downs, and problems are not solved by blaming each other, but by communicating, understanding, and by dropping that recent mistake.

They are only solved by standing together and holding each other tightly to find solutions.

Sometimes, words do not come out when we are in pain, knowing our lover has committed a mistake.

Sometimes it is our pride and ego that prevents us from forgiving or apologizing to our spouse.

In this book, I am going to share the methods that I have found through my life experience, and this is how I live my life to this day.

I am not claiming to be perfect, but experience has taught me to be who I am today. I do face problems in my marriage, but Alhamdulilah/Praise be to God, I have learned along the way to be patient and sort out these problems with a calm attitude.

Two things I have learned in this world about marriage, the first of which is that there is no perfect marriage because we human beings are not perfect. When you know this and believe in this, you will forgive a lot and you will be able to handle your marital relationship better.

The second is that you must stay focused and never listen to people unless you really have to. There are two groups of people: those who love you and those who don’t. Those who love you, most of them will want to protect you, but this protection sometimes hurts. They will feel you need protection, so the advise they will give you : leave that dude... Leave that woman... You should not be treated like that.

The second group are those who do not love you, so what do you expect from someone who does not love you? Sometimes we don’t even know that this person doesn’t love us. They can ruin your marriage, and when you are divorced, they will go behind your back and laugh at you with their friends.

Some people have gone through an abusive marriage, so when you tell them your problem, they recall their problems to solve yours. And sometimes you meet people who are divorced, and they want others to be divorced to join `Team Divorce`.

You must be wise and careful with whom you are sharing your marital problems.

The ways to approach marriage in this book made my relationship with my husband simple and sweet; they made our marriage not a task, but something we take pleasure in. These methods can make any marriage happy and attractive.

This book begins with topics such as why you want to get married, how prepared you are, and whom to choose to be your life partner.

You will learn how to keep the spark of love burning strong and continue throughout the entire marriage and how to get through tough times in marriage by communicating openly and learn to give equality.

You will understand how to fix problems by learning to respect each other and treat each other the best. How to avoid emotionalizing every discussion and how to avoid staying in each other’s past mistakes.

You will read about how to renew and rekindle the spark of love and romance after having children to help the marriage stay stronger.

If you and your spouse are disconnected for years and there is no hope to regain that feeling of `love butterflies` in the stomach again, this book will show you the way back. You will go back and rekindle the love and romance again.

This book was written by a woman, but it implies to both genders, and it is for young and old