Lead from Where You Are: Building Intention, Connection and Direction in Our Schools

INTRODUCTION

A few years ago, my wife decided that it was her family’s turn to go on the Great American Family Vacation. This is the cross-country trip in a vehicle to see the wonders of the United States. It was going to be a bonding experience. Our kids, ages six, nine, and twelve, were going to get along famously. They were going to play cards in the back of the car and see how many license plates they could discover, and each day would end with a journal entry about the incredible time they were having on their family vacation. As a family, we were going to stop when we were tired, sing songs, read a book together, and get along like we were straight out of a 1970s TV sitcom all the way to Yellowstone National Park. According to my wife, it was going to be great. For months she talked to the kids about how excited she was and how it was going to be a trip they would one day tell their own kids about. It got to the point where I honestly believed there would be angelic music playing as we entered the park.

I was so wrong. According to Google Maps, Yellowstone National Park was only 1,071 miles from our home in Fall Creek, Wisconsin, about a sixteen-hour drive. When the day arrived, we were ready to head out, the car was packed, we had snacks, devices were charged, and we had books to read. The excitement in the car was palpable, but it lasted about thirty-seven minutes. This was about the time we realized that the six-year-old had not stopped talking since we left the house. She is an extraordinarily inquisitive young lady, and apparently, our trip to Yellowstone National Park was the time to get out every question she had ever thought of since her birth.

The conversations—and I use that term loosely, as it usually indicates more than one person talking—were centered on all of the things that were going wrong around her. The iPod wasn’t charged to the fullest extent, she couldn’t reach the snacks, and my favorite, her brothers were breathing too heavily because she could hear them. It seemed that everything around her was a drain on the great time she was supposed to be having. She asked question after question, all generated by the things that were most immediately in her sight line and causing her angst.

After what felt like an eternity, the impossible happened. She stopped . . . and stared out the front windshield. She stopped talking long enough to catch her breath, then continued, but this time it was different: What’s that? Why does it look like that? Can we go there? We had just entered Yellowstone, and it was the first mountain she had ever seen in person. It was her moment of awe. It was a time that scrambled everything she knew and made her rethink her place in the world. It was also a moment I will never forget. The trip reminded me a lot about how I started leading. Like my daughter, I was so focused on what was going wrong that I failed to be fully invested in the joy of the journey. I saw things I felt needed to be changed based on experiences I’d had in the past, and when I was constantly looking at areas that needed adjustment, I never took a step back and marveled at the fact that the people in classrooms and hallways, on the courts and the field, were changing the lives of those they served. In doing that, I started to lose the joy of leading and helping people move forward. Addressing the why first, then the what, and finally the how helped me move forward.

WHY?

Everyone in a school community does what they do for a reason. Every year, we work with a group of people who have their own perspectives on how things in schools should look. These perspectives have meaningful origins for the people who hold them, whether they were formed long ago as students or more recently as educators. These origins are their why—why they started doing this job and why they continue to do this job. Leadership is about finding people’s why and helping them to build from that point. Everyone’s journey is different. If we know and understand that everyone has a different starting point, and we want them to get to the desired end point, we also have to acknowledge that the journey will be different for everyone. If we don’t take time to honor everyone’s starting point, it is much less likely that they will be willing to head in the direction of the desired end point. This doesn’t mean that we have to love where their starting point is, but we must value and honor that it is where they are. Their why is important, and without understanding it you will have a hard time helping them move forward.

WHAT?

My daughter didn’t know what she was going to see until it happened. The awe moment made her want to look out the front window and not worry about all the things happening around her. We often find ourselves worrying about what is going on around us in schools rather than what is happening right in front of us. The job of a great leader is to help everyone envision a collective goal and eliminate barriers that stand in the way of reaching it. The vision, like the view out of the front window, should inspire and keep those in the organization moving in a positive direction.

HOW?

The logistics of a situation can cloud the thinking of those on the team. My daughter’s attitude about what was happening during the drive was severely hampered by the things happening around her. Some things, like her brothers’ breathing, were not going to change. But there were other things we could have done, like charging her iPod or letting her know when we would be stopping next, that could have helped her cope with the situation. How many things get in the way of people doing their best work in schools? If we want to set up the environment for success, we need to envision success for all. We are all learners in the space. If the only people in the space who are learning are under eighteen, then we are doing it wrong.

As leaders, we plan the team-building game that is supposed to set the tone for the year, and we assume that the awe factor comes with a staff breakfast or the smell of fresh wax on the floors. The awe factor of what a space looks like will last minutes. The awe factor of how people feel when they do something they didn’t think was possible will last a lifetime. The relationships formed in schools have a profound impact on individuals and communities. They last for decades. Students tell stories of how they felt to other students, parents tell their kids how they felt in schools, and conversations in bars, restaurants, and grocery stores often start with When I was in school . . .

We often talk about the importance of building connections, yet we don’t talk about how to do it. This book is not only about the importance of creating relationships in and out of your school; it’s also about taking action. It is about leading from a place where connections are at the core of what we do and building an environment where all learners have the opportunity to lead. How we lead impacts how those we care for will act.

There are a number of theories in the education world about how we can improve schools. Most are built on the idea that we need to improve student achievement in certain areas of study. Though I understand where those theories are coming from, I can’t help thinking that we are looking at the wrong target. Schools are learning organizations, and that will never change, but is the learning we focus on reflective of content or skills? If we want to change the way the world operates, we need to change the way people view themselves in the grand scheme of that world. We can talk about how we want everyone in our school community to feel like they are part of the solution, but what do we have in place to ensure they are empowered to do so?

There are leadership opportunities around every corner. School communities are full of people who have both the ability and desire to lead. Some lead without knowing. Most lead without the recognition they deserve. As leaders in a space, be that a classroom, department, building, or district, it is our job to find more leaders. It is our job to ensure they know their worth and how they can grow their leadership capacity. It is our job to cultivate connections to help them create more leaders. It is our job to help them lead from where they are.

People are often placed into leadership positions because of a great interview or because they have experienced some success in a different role. The fact is, being a leader means taking the process of learning to lead seriously. Certifications, degrees, and experience can all play a role in that development, but the process has to take you out of your comfort zone and help you move to a different level. The challenge for leaders is that we try to get better at too many things and subsequently get better at none. We discuss how we can improve in an area but rarely find the time to dig deep and get better in our leadership practice. This book is about growing. It is about identifying your own leadership journey and then helping others build their capacity to lead.

Leaders are everywhere. They are five, fifteen, and fifty, and they are all over your school. The task of leadership goes well beyond putting a sign on your door or the listing your position on your name tag. It is about providing an opportunity for those you lead. It is about identifying leadership traits as you walk down every hallway, every day. It is about helping those without a voice grow to the point that theirs is the loudest voice, so when they think back to what happened in your school, they smile. Our schools are often seen as a means to an end. We say we are creating the leaders of tomorrow but don’t let them lead until they leave. We say we have tremendous leaders on our staff, yet we don’t allow them to lead in a capacity that would make them feel valued. We need people to lead, and the greatest leaders find ways to get the most out of those around them. They help them lead and realize their impact from where they are.

The book is developed around three principles: intention, connection, and direction. you Put into practice, these principles will impact your current position and help those around you increase their impact. Collectively, the entire organization will flourish.

Intention

Being intentional means controlling our behavior in an environment so the environment doesn’t control us. When we are intentional with our actions in an environment, we have a much bigger impact on what happens in that environment. We can’t always control the environment, but we can control our actions in the environment. Being intentional starts with knowing yourself. Understanding what outcome we are looking for and focusing on the behavior we demonstrate to get there profoundly impacts a result.

Connection

Connection follows intention because if you don’t know your focus and are not aware of the impact your behavior has on an environment, it is hard to connect people to lead in that environment. Connection is about focusing on the intended outcome and finding a way to build momentum toward that outcome with the group you lead. Ensuring everyone you lead knows and understands the intended outcome is truly important, but many leaders stop there. They set the goal, profess the goal, maybe send out the data that tells people why that goal is important or add the goal to some letterhead. The clarity of the goal is important, but the connection to why the goal is important to those working toward said goal it is just as essential. When we have a personal connection to why the work needs to be done, we invest more. Those we lead feel the same way. Making the connection between the personal why of what we do and the collective why of the organization keeps everyone focused and invested in the outcome.

Direction

Organizations move forward together when there is a focus on getting better daily. If your group is better tomorrow than it was today, even a little, the impact over time is profound. Of course, the how needs to be part of the conversation. Just telling the group that you want to get better every single day, which I did on multiple occasions early in my career, is great for a poster but doesn’t give clarity to those you lead. The best coaches in the world don’t tell their players to play harder, they show them what the right plays look like. The best CEOs don’t tell employees they need to produce more, they help them along the way so that everyone is invested in the outcome. Direction combines the intentionality of our behavior and our connection to those we lead with a destination. Once we have a destination, we walk not way in front or way behind those we lead, but with them.

These main components are embedded into the process of building your leadership capacity and the leadership capacity of those around you by ensuring that those you lead answer the following questions:

Why is it meaningful?

What does it look like in education?

How do you do it?

WHY, WHAT, HOW

Finish these phrases:

Lights, camera, _____

Ready, set, _____

The good, the bad, _____

Historically, the rule of three has been used to help us remember songs, phrases, stories, and jokes. Wise men, bears, pigs, mice, and Stooges are all examples of the rule of three. Our brains naturally seek out patterns to make connections. This book has three parts to facilitate retention and, hopefully, broaden impact: why, what, and how.

In part I, we’ll look at why. Finding your why gives you purpose. It grounds you. It makes you remember the reason you started this work when it gets to be too much to