MY SUCCESS IS YOUR SUCCESS: Questions, Reflections & Answers

What makes a life meaningful?

It is difficult to give a definitive answer to the question.

Simple, because everyone has their own ideas of what a meaningful life should be. What may give purpose and meaning to one person may be completely different from another.

In general, a meaningful life is a life of happiness and self-fulfillment, a life surrounded by loved ones and activities that are enjoyed.

If a person is satisfied with what he is doing with his life, then for him his life has meaning. To have a meaningful life is to wake up each morning with a sense of appreciation for the opportunity to live another day.

Everyone is here for a reason. Finding that reason can be difficult, but to find it, you must pursue your passion. Doing whatever it takes to accomplish something you love makes your life worth living.

Whether it's caring for people, excelling at your job, or creating something new, your passion creates an inner joy unlike anything else.

Some people seem to spend their whole lives unsatisfied in search of the ultimate goal. However, we all have what we need to live a meaningful life.

When you know you are working towards that passion every day, you feel a sense of purpose. You are drawn into this state of self-fulfillment. And until you can achieve this goal, you are dissatisfied, and you feel a void in your life.

Self-fulfillment should be a lifelong goal for everyone.

The whole process gives meaning to your life, but you can't stop when you think you've reached your goal. You must continue to set higher goals for yourself, so that your life will always have a meaning.

A meaningful life is above all the accumulation of success for which you have set the goals. To do this, you must set goals and achieve them, you must motivate yourself.

Motivation is a powerful energy that determines the way we work, the vigor with which we approach our lives, and a greater sense of purpose derived from what we do.

Motivation is, in short, the incentive we need to wake up in the morning, get dressed and get to work.

To help us understand what the motivation for success is, we must first focus on the basic needs of life and the exploration of self through, the will to achieve.

Once you have a good understanding of basic needs and their hierarchy, you will be better able to motivate yourself while avoiding unrealistic expectations with an action plan that will need to consider the passion and vocation.

THE needs OF LIFE

To do this, let's look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory. Abraham Maslow was a mid-20th-century American psychologist working in the field of humanistic psychology, who introduced the concept of self-realization, highlighting our innate need for fulfillment.

According to Maslow's theory, an individual begins by focusing on the lower order needs of physiology and safety.

A person who has just started their career will be more concerned with physiological needs such as a stable income and security needs. Once these basic needs are met, she or he will now focus on social needs.

Once these needs are met, she or he will want to meet higher-level needs such as self-esteem needs.

These needs are linked to the person's image and their desire for respect and recognition from others. Even if the person doesn't want to move into a higher role, they probably don't want to continue doing the same job for their entire life.

Maslow's theory is based on five basic types of needs. Often represented, as levels in a pyramid, the needs residing in the lower levels must be satisfied before those of the higher levels can be met.

1. Physical: the need for air, water, food, sleep.

2. Security: the need for security, shelter, stability.

3. Social: the need for intimate relationships, to be loved, to belong.

4. Self-esteem: the need for self-esteem, prestige, recognition of achievements.

5. Self-realization: the need to develop, to be creative, to realize one's full capacities.

The first four levels are considered « deficiency needs. » If we lack any of these levels, we can become distracted, anxious, or depressed. If all these needs are met, we are free to explore our « growth needs » or our unique human need to grow as individuals.

Physical Needs: our biological needs « air, water, food, shelter » are simple, but vital for survival, and when they are not met, put all other needs on hold.

For instance, you must take a lunch break, but you are delayed for half an hour at the end of a meeting. Your body and brain react biologically and emotionally to the need to eat.

When you are « hungry » your ability to focus on your work steadily decreases as the urgency to meet your hunger increases.

Security needs: security can mean feeling physically secure, but it can also mean a desire for stability, order, predictability, and control regarding, for example, in the workplace, pay, working hours, structures, team building, workload and performance monitoring, to name a few.

All these circumstances lead to feelings of conflict, instability, and a lack of confidence in the ability to meet needs.

Social needs: the ease with which we feel welcome in a group or in finding people « like us » has a huge impact on our performance at work and in life in general.

Feeling like an outsider means, you're less likely to engage, offer ideas, or go the extra mile for fear of being ridiculed.

When we feel welcome, we are more likely to trust those around us and trust ourselves to be ourselves. Our ideas and efforts are validated, motivating us to do and be better.

If you can't express yourself authentically and adapt to it, it may be best, to leave the environment altogether.

The goal is not to have everyone get along with each other all the time. The important thing is to find harmony within your group while allowing individuals to be themselves to form an engaged and motivated group.

Needs of self-esteem: when we learn to ride a bike, we start with training wheels for support and balance. We build self-esteem by mastering this task.

Once we mastered the technique, the training wheels come off and a steady hand on the back of the seat helps us learn to balance the bike while moving. Eventually, that hand lets go, and you ride alone.

Like riding a bicycle, to meet the needs of our ego both at work and socially, we must develop self-esteem through an ability to perform tasks independently.

We also need a support system that helps us achieve our goal and a recognition system that validates our accomplishments.

For example, to motivate ourselves in this way at work, we need to look for work that showcases our abilities while challenging us to master new skills.

However, it is suggested to place at the top of your list, the mastery of observing the people around you as well as your communication skills.

Needs for self-realization: Maslow defined self-realization as the desire to « become all that one is capable of becoming. »

The need for self-realization can materialize when you have « harnessed » all the experiences and knowledge in each circumstance, but you know that you can do more, and you can do better. The awareness of this needs to grow comes to the fore because all other needs have been met.

Free from distractions, you can take a broad look at the sum of your efforts and decide what really makes you feel fulfilled. This level of freedom has its own motivating power, making it easier for you or the people around you to take the next step on a personal development journey.

To support this, find continuing education opportunities, higher-level certifications, or resources that help pursue these passions.

Over time, you will recognize that your needs overlap or change in importance based on individual circumstances.

Awareness and constant communication around your needs and those of the people around you are the essential component to meet these needs, whatever their order.

motivation

Motivation is what drives us to achieve our goals, feel more fulfilled, and improve our overall quality of life.

Understanding and developing your personal motivation can help you take control of many other aspects of your life.

To improve your personal motivation, you could think of achieving an ambition, or placing yourself in a state of mind. To be more specific, there are two types of mindsets, the fixed and the evolving.

For people with a fixed mindset, they believe talent is ingrained and they cannot change their level of ability. And there are those with an evolutionary mindset who believe they can improve their skills through hard work and effort.

People who believe they can improve themselves have an evolutionary mindset above all else, and they are much more likely to succeed in any field they choose.

A growth mindset is therefore an important element in a personal desire to succeed. Other elements of personal drive include organization, especially good time management and avoiding distractions.

There is plenty of evidence, albeit largely anecdotal, that goal setting is important for our overall well-being.

For example, Albert Einstein reminded us; if you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.

Most of us need to aim for something in our lives. Knowing where you want to go and understanding how you plan to get there is the key to staying motivated.

To do this, it is necessary to consider helping you in your quest for success, to develop a spirit of initiative.

Initiative is, in fact, the ability to take advantage of circumstances when they arise, and it is too easy to hesitate and then the opportunity may be lost.

However, the old saying, look before you jump, makes perfect sense. It's important to think things through and make sure you're making the right decision for you, while considering the other people involved.

The initiative can therefore be seen as a combination of courage and good risk management.

Risk management is necessary to ensure that you identify the right opportunities to consider, and that they present the appropriate level of risk for you.

Courage is needed to overcome the fear of the unknown inherent in new circumstances.

However, the initiative cannot take place without a touch of optimism accompanied by resilience.

Optimism is the ability to see the bright side of things or to think positively. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks or stay positive in the face of challenges. The two are closely related, although not exactly the same.

Resilient people use their thinking skills to manage negative emotional reactions to events. In other words, they use positive or rational thinking to examine and, if necessary, overcome reactions that they understand, may not be entirely logical. They are also willing to ask for help when needed, as well as generously offering their help to others in need.

On the other hand, it helps to understand what motivates you to do things. There are two main types of motivators, intrinsic and extrinsic.

In their simplest form, you can consider these two types of motivation: intrinsic, which is related to what you want to do, and extrinsic, which is related to what you must do. To be more precise:

Intrinsic: Performing an action or task based on the expected or perceived satisfaction of performing the action or task. Intrinsic motivations include pleasure, interest, and personal challenge.

Extrinsic: Performing an action or task to gain some sort of external reward, including money, power, and good grades.

Also, consider that different people are motivated by different things and at different times in their lives.

The same task can have more intrinsic motivations at certain times and more extrinsic motivations at others, and most tasks combine the two types of motivation.

Remember, we all tend to work better when we love what we do. It's easier to get out of bed in the morning, we're happier at our jobs, and happier in general.

Research shows that this is especially important when we are under stress. It is much easier to deal with stress and long hours if we generally enjoy our work. Intrinsic motivators therefore play a big role in personal motivation for most of us.

What if a task has no intrinsic motivations or extrinsic motivations?

The obvious conclusion is that we are unlikely to do so, as it would serve no purpose.

We all know it doesn't always work that way. There is another problem, the feeling of obligation.

Obligation motivations are not strictly intrinsic or extrinsic but can still be very powerful.

Obligation itself result from our personal ethics and our sense of duty, of what is right and what is not.

For example, you may feel compelled to go to a party because someone you know has invited you. There will be no obvious extrinsic or intrinsic benefit to attending, but you may fear offending or upsetting your friend if you don't.

However, you are more likely to enjoy the party if you go with a positive and open attitude, expecting it to be fun. As a result, it adds intrinsic motivation, allowing you to have fun and consequently derive some satisfaction from it.

Here, we must understand that wishing to be motivated, or even to improve your personal motivation a little, will not happen overnight.

There are a lot of skills involved and you can't expect to develop them all instantly.

However, a better understanding of the elements of motivation, and especially their combination, should help increase your skills.

Just remember that Rome was not built in a day: think about progressing over a long period and in small steps!

People who have achieved extraordinary success in life are extremely motivated people. They live a passionate life, they work tirelessly on their goals, and they are always on the move no matter what.

So, have you ever wondered if you are someone who is highly motivated, or someone who is not?

Motivated people come from all walks of life. It can be anyone who is driven by a clear goal and has a burning desire to achieve their dreams.

And, to achieve exceptional results in life, you must develop the characteristics of a highly motivated individual:

You must detach yourself from the ordinary to achieve the extraordinary.

You must choose to move on when others give up.

You must work harder and dare to pursue your dreams while the rest of the world is still comfortably in its cozy bed.

You must have a clear and useful purpose rather than living your life without a purpose.

So, what are the characteristics of motivated people and how can you become one?

They are absolutely clear about what they want: first of all, motivated people are absolutely clear about what they want in life. They are goal oriented and driven by their goal. If you want to be motivated, you need to know why you're doing what you're doing. Your purpose is the energy that sustains you when you encounter difficulties and challenges.

They always live their purpose: knowing what you want from your life is just the beginning. What you need to do next is to live your life according to your purpose. There's no point in dreaming about what you want, if you don't do anything about it.

Motivated people are motivated most of the time because they have programmed what they want to accomplish into their subconscious. Therefore, they can't help but constantly think about their dreams, goals, and what they want to achieve in life. You should do the same.

Make your goals and dreams your dominant thoughts for you to think about at all times. Remember, you will become what you think about most of the time.

If you are constantly thinking about enjoying life, watching a movie, and playing games, guess what, that will be exactly what will make your life. However, if you consistently hold on to the idea of achieving your goals, living your dreams, and achieving great success, you will reap great benefits.

You become goal-oriented. You will become more motivated and take action to achieve them. So be like all successful people, keep the things you want to accomplish in mind, and you will bring them into your life.

They ignore detractors: another trait of motivated people is that they ignore naysayers. They are so driven that they ignore the rest of the world. So ignore the naysayers and chase your dreams.

    That is, if you want to be a driven person, don't listen, to what other people tell you about how to live your life. Instead, choose to listen to yourself.

Follow your heart and chase your dreams and let the rest of the world admire your success once you've done it.

They are always passionate and full of energy: what are the common characteristics of motivated people?

They are always passionate and dynamic.

Do you live your life with passion and energy?

If not, re-examine your goals and think about what you really want in your life.

Highly motivated people always live their lives with passion and seem to have all the energy in the world.

Your work is going to take up a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe to be a great job. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do.

If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Do not be discouraged.

Therefore, if you want to be highly motivated, align your goals and dreams and live with passion!

They act massively and keep progressing: yes, motivated people are constantly on the move. They are taking massive and consistent action every day. They are constantly progressing towards their goals.

They don't just talk about their dreams; they make them come true. They dare to persevere, and they always progress.

Does that mean they make no mistakes or will never fail?

Not at all. Successful people fail, but they don't stop there. They make a mistake, they learn from it, and then they keep moving forward. They don't dwell on their mistakes and failures.

Take the time to study successful people in their respective lives, you will see that they don't just talk, they act. They act despite many difficulties and challenges.

This is the kind of persona you need to embrace if you want to be a driven person who strives to achieve their dreams. Progress all the time. Get into the habit of always taking at least one step to reach the goal.

They dare to sacrifice and take risks: yes, motivated people dare to sacrifice themselves and they are ready to take risks.

The key to achieving the success you want in life is figuring out what you want and then getting busy paying the price to get there.

Unsuccessful people understand what they need to do to get there, but they're not willing to pay the price. Successful people, on the other hand, understand this and are willing to sacrifice themselves and pay the full price.

Those who have achieved extraordinary results in life are those who don't complain and choose to do so even when they don't feel like it.

They are motivated to achieve their goals and are absolutely committed.

Successful people are clear about the « why » of what they do. The « why » provides the deeper meaning responsible for maintaining their motivation.

They understand that they can get almost anything they want out of life, if they're willing to pay the price.

So, are you ready to do more?

Are you ready to do the hard work where most people don't want to?

When you are absolutely determined to achieve what you want, you give yourself no excuses, you just accomplish. And only then will you become a motivated person who makes things happen.

They take full responsibility for everything that happens to them: motivated people have an « it's up to me » mentality.

They know that whatever is happening to them right now is only temporary and they are in control of changing their lives because they oversee their lives.

They are the ones who are responsible for their lives. That's why it's normal that they can be born into a poor family, but that doesn't mean they have to be poor for the rest of their lives.

They believe they are the ones who can change their destiny. And so, they make choices and decisions based on the future they want.

Of course, there are things we cannot control, such as weather, gravity, nature. But that doesn't mean we can't be responsible for what happens to us.

Even if you can't control the event, you can still control your responses.

Like this saying: I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can trim my sails to always reach my destination.

Motivated people understand that blame, excuses, and justifications are not going to help them reach a higher level. And if they want to win the game of life, they must take full responsibility for their lives.

You too should do the same. Don't blame or make excuses. Take responsibility for your life from this moment on.

They defer instant gratification: yes, highly motivated people know the power of gratification. When given the choice between partying and making their dreams come true, they always choose to make their dreams come true.

They understand that if they work harder now for what they want, they can enjoy it later.

Success is about making the right choices and doing the things that will get you where you want to go.

Often people choose to have instant pleasure rather than sacrifice themselves and work towards their goals.

Motivated people understand that they must work hard now and sacrifice for their future.

Remember this quote: Success is living a few years of your life like most people won't, so you can spend the rest of your life like most people can't.

Therefore, learn to defer gratification. Choose to work on what is important and not on something that gives you immediate pleasure.

So choose to defer gratification.

Work on the essentials. Work on your goals and dreams. And when you get there, you can taste the victory of your own hard work, which in itself will be far more fulfilling and enjoyable than the small gratification of the moment.

9.      They work very hard: should I explain more?

Motivated people are people who work extremely hard. They choose to work on their dreams and goals whenever possible.

Rather than wasting time checking their friends for updates on Facebook, Twitter and the like, they choose to work on their goals.

They don't just waste time for anything, but they enjoy working towards their goals and chasing their dreams.

That's not to say, highly motivated people don't enjoy or don't have free time. They just work harder so they can enjoy later.

Therefore, do not be lazy. Keep doing, pushing yourself, and eventually your hard work will pay off.

They make mistakes and fail, but don't give up: motivated people are people who will never give up. A winner will never quit, and a quitter will never win.

The only way to achieve victory is to not give up, no matter how difficult the situation. No matter what happens, choose not to give up.

You may face failures and experience dramatic setbacks, but whatever you do, don't give up.

Motivated individuals know they are working for a greater purpose.

They don't work for the money or the car, they work for a higher purpose that motivates them internally.

And, because they are working for a purpose greater than themselves, they will not give up. They make mistakes and they fail, but they keep moving forward.

unrealistic expectations

A new job, a new relationship, we've all been there. We are so eager to get things done. All the ideas swirling around in our heads now have the chance to come to life.

However, this impatience never ends well. What usually happens in such a scenario is that we start out with unrealistic expectations.

We always want to be perfect and never make mistakes. However, that just doesn't happen.

To achieve this, we must not forget that we must spend a lot of time and energy. Therefore, we inevitably fall short of expectations.

As our illusion of perfection crumbles, our self-esteem tends to follow the movement. So, to save ourselves, we give up. We stop trying, as much as possible so that the next failure doesn't sting so much.

If this is something that's been undermining, you then maybe it's time to adopt a longer-term strategy of pursuing success. It should always be remembered that the best things come to those who are patient and above all ready to invest themselves fully.

When our purpose is clear, it leads to success and if we are successful, it leads to more options and opportunities.

However, when you have more options and opportunities, it leads to diffused efforts and scattered efforts undermining the very clarity that led to your success in the first place.

So, it is suggested to focus on the most important things. Take the time to evaluate and put into a perspective to focus your energy on the goal to be achieved.

It's about making the wisest investment of your time and energy, so you can be most efficient by doing only what's essential.

you need a plan

We always need a plan. When we're too excited to start something new, we often don't come up with a plan.

We go headlong into it thinking we can catch up as we go along, but, from experience, it ends up making us inconsistent.

Not having a plan leaves a lot of room for things to go wrong. And, after a while of struggling in the dark, the work becomes too overwhelming and then you end up giving up.

Taking the time to develop a plan allows you to take appropriate action and when to execute it.

Such an elaboration allows us to put into perspective, to follow our progress over time to obtain success.

Additionally, people tend to rely on external positive validation and praise to keep them going.

Here it must be understood that we give up so easily, because we are subconsciously programmed to survive through external validation.

Humans are an extremely social species. For millennia, it was genetically advantageous to be socially approved of by those around us.

Even though we like to think we've evolved, things are still the same. To this day, we thrive on positive reinforcement from others.

It is easy to see this. It's about a boss telling you that you're doing a good job, and immediately you experience joy.

However, if that's the only thing that motivates you to go to work in the morning, then you're simply giving them complete control of your happiness.

Another aspect of having your life controlled by others is when you pay too much attention to negative comments. Don't get me wrong, we should always take the advice of others into consideration.

We are not perfect, but we can do better.

However, once the feedback becomes only negative from one source, it becomes problematic. It won't work.

Why do you persist in trying?

You should give up. These are powerful messages that are slowly but surely beginning to fester within us.

If, external negative talk is something you struggle with, then I highly recommend that you start using positive affirmations first thing in the morning.

For example, I'm good enough, I'm worth it, I'll be fine. Repeating statements like this, to yourself will be a game changer in terms of changing your perspective on your life.

So, when you remove all the positive and negative outer voices, what are you left with?

If the answer to this question is nothing, you have a problem on your hands. You need to be able to find your « why. »

Why do I want this so badly?

What do I gain from it?

Why am I here?

These are undoubtedly difficult questions to answer. However, you will have to complete this challenge.

A good way to put it all into perspective is to document your feelings whenever you're about to start a new project. 

This will allow you to dig deeper into your subconscious, allowing for inner criticism, to debate situations. You will be surprised at how much you can learn about yourself when you give yourself the space to open.

This introspection will allow you to realize that you did not deserve it. This point hits a little too close. It all boils down to one thing, low self-confidence.

So, like many, we display a façade of trust. We don't want those around us to think that we are not insecure, because that would be seen as a sign of weakness.

So, when we fail, a large part of us expected it to happen.

I'm not smart enough. I knew it would be like this.

It is the negative thoughts directed by our inner critic that run amok in our brain. If you're stuck in this negative spiral, the best thing you can do is put less pressure on yourself.

You must become the biggest supporter of yourself. For example, it is about taking long walks to reflect, to put into perspective, to rekindle your positivism. You could also treat yourself to a few pleasures of life.

When negativity sets in, you tend to lie to yourself all the time. You mask yourself to pretend to be someone you think people will like.

While you might end up attracting a fake crowd, the main downside will be that you'll end up forgetting who you are under fake guises.

Have you ever been surprised to start a task because of social pressure, then six months later wondering why you're still there?

Here it is important to consider that self-knowledge is one of the greatest skills necessary for success. You can fake a personality for months or even years.

However, if that's not who you are, you will eventually give up. Instead, find out what your strengths are, then focus on them. Be the best at what you are, and success will follow!

You must understand that motivation will only take you part of the way. There will be days when you need all your energy to get out of bed. Days when it feels like the entire universe has conspired against you. These are the days when you will need consistent discipline.

Once motivation is accompanied by a good foundation of discipline, giving up becomes much more difficult.

However, it must be remembered that there is no success without failures and that you will always have to consider the factor of failure in the management of your discipline, to favor your success and thus benefit from a meaningful life.

IT NEEDS