The Power of Letting Go: 7 Steps to Letting Go of the Past, Learning to Forgive and Living Life to the Full: Self-help and personal development

Introduction

I’m glad you’re holding this book in your hands and I’m even gladder that you’ve decided to give letting go a chance. In the psychology field, this may sound a little abstract or complicated (I promise you that it’s not).

Over the following pages, I’ll explain what it means to emotionally let go, when it’s necessary, and how to do it. Through years of experience, I’ve discovered that letting go is a process with seven consecutive steps. We’ll go through them one by one so you can understand why each one is important.

Before we start, there are two basic ideas you need to keep in mind: first, life is change. Second, life is connection.

Let me explain.

From birth to death, we’re constantly changing: we embrace new things and leave others behind. We do this when we stop crawling because we’ve learned to walk, when we start a new romantic relationship and have to let go of past ones, and when we become independent from our parents. It’s natural. Life is about evolving, about moving forward.

On the other hand, throughout this life of change, we form bonds and get emotionally involved with things around us, whether they’re people, places, experiences or lessons. These bonds are part of being human and are necessary for our development.

However, some of those bonds become unhealthy over time, leading to dysfunctional attachments. Instead of helping us grow, they chain us down and drain our energy.

Why don’t we just let go of these bonds, just like we stopped crawling or believing in Santa Claus? Well, because we don’t always recognize them as toxic, nor do we know how to cut those ties in the right ways.

When bonds become emotional burdens, we often try to ignore them or assume that the pain they cause is normal. We hope that time will heal all wounds, but that’s not always the case: time does NOT heal all wounds. What heals is the conscious and voluntary act of letting go of what’s hurting you.

What do we mean by letting go?

In psychology, letting go means facilitating departure; giving ourselves permission to move on without something we’ve been carrying, and accepting the consequences that may arise from that separation.

Letting go means no longer clinging to relationships, beliefs, feelings of guilt, resentment, jobs, and so on. It means accepting the change and uncertainty that comes with the new and unknown, and trusting that you are prepared for it.

Letting go also means facing the possible void or feeling of helplessness that follows any separation. That’s why it’s important to do it right; otherwise, you may find that you relapse and end up chained to new emotional burdens that prevent you from growing or reaching your full potential.

The devil you know…is the devil. Period.

Our ability to adapt is extraordinary (much more than you think!), but we tend to repress it because, when choosing between the devil we know and the unknown good, we often choose the former. This book is about learning to choose the latter, to free yourself from what limits you. If something has been a significant part of your life for a long time, it’s not enough to just let it go; a transition period is necessary.

So, this book is for you if:

Whatever your current situation, your past, or your outlook on life, you have two choices right now: to keep clinging to what’s stopping you from growing but giving you a sense of control, or to try letting go and looking back at your chains from a new and liberating perspective.

You may be afraid of taking off and crashing again, just as you have before. You may be terrified of letting go of something and then regretting it. That’s normal; I’ve had those fears too. But you know what? They’re part of life. And the only thing that isn’t part of life is not moving forward.

Not only is letting go beneficial for your mental health; it’s essential for your fulfillment as a human being. Just as you no longer believe in the tooth fairy, but you know that belief was a part of your life (and you’re not ashamed of it!), you must let go of other things without feeling insecure or guilty.

If you want to become the best version of yourself—and I assure you that that version is amazing—you need to remove things from your life. You need to do some emotional cleaning up. But it has to be done right. For now, the only thing I ask is that you read this book with an open mind. This way, change will start almost unconsciously. Little by little, you’ll progress until you take flight. You’ll feel lighter, freer, and more at ease with yourself. You won’t forget