How to Reset, Reframe, and Reshape: A Mother's Guide to Changing Her Mindset About Fitness and Her Body

How to Reset, Reframe, and Reshape:

A Mother’s Guide to Changing Her Mindset About Fitness and Her Body

Copyright ©2024 Cassie Morell

www.CassieMorell.com

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. For permissions contact: [email protected]

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this book is provided for educational purposes only and should not replace medical and/or psychiatric advice. The use of this book implies your acceptance of this disclaimer.

First edition 2024

Printed in the USA

ISBN 979-8-9909318-0-0 (Hard Cover)

ISBN 979-8-9909318-1-7 (Paperback)

ISBN 979-8-9909318-2-4 (eBook)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2024913145

Editing by Kevin Anderson & Associates, www.ka-writing.com

Photography by Melissa Jones, 3816 Creative, www.3816creative.com

Video production by Gary Sarcione, Stream of Vision Productions

Cover and interior formatting by Becky’s Graphic Design®, LLC

www.BeckysGraphicDesign.com

Publisher’s Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Morell, Cassie, author.

Title: How to reset , reframe , and reshape : a mother’s guide to changing her mindset about fitness and her body / Cassie Morell.

Description: Includes bibliographical references. | Cassie Morell, 2024.

Identifiers: LCCN: 2024913145 | ISBN: 979-8-9909318-0-0 (hardcover) | 979-8-9909318-1-7 (paperback) | 979-8-9909318-2-4 (ebook)

Subjects: LCSH Postnatal care. | Physical fitness for women. | Exercise for women. | Mothers--Health and hygiene. | BISAC HEALTH & FITNESS / Women’s Health

Classification: LCC RG801 .M67 2024 | DDC 613.7/045--dc23

Contents

Dedication

Introduction

Fitness Success Starts with Self-Love

Why Do You Want to Be a Fit Mom?

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall. . .

Simplifying the Science of Nutrition and Weight Loss

The Biggest Fitness Pitfalls Mothers Fall Prey To

Combating Pitfall #1

—The Poor Diet

Combating Pitfall #2

—The Yo-Yo Diet

Nutritional Tracking Tools and Tips

Combating Pitfall #3

–Muscle Loss

Combating Pitfall #4

—Too Much Planned Cardio

Understanding Progressive Overload

The ReShapeHER 3-Day and 5-Day Fitness Plans

ReShapeHER 3-Day Fitness Plan

ReShapeHER 5-Day Fitness Plan

Maintaining Your ReShapeHER Physique

(aka: Maintenance season)

My Top 10 ReShapeHER Fitness Lessons

Endnotes

About the Author

Dedication

My dear, sweet Catalina,

This book is my dedication to you. Every thought, word, and page was fueled by my intent to ensure that you are able to embrace motherhood in your future, without the fear of losing yourself physically. My hope is that by reading this book, you will be able to enjoy all of the precious moments that being a mother has to offer, without hearing a voice of doubt fill your mind when it comes to regaining your fitness. This book is a representation of my healing journey as a mother. . . the part of me that refuses to carry the dysfunctions of the past, fighting hard to break crippling cycles that are based solely on a lack of education and a foundation of insecurity. This journey would never have been traveled had it not been for you. . . my firstborn.

Each chapter of this book represents a healing process that I am so grateful I can pass on to you. As you read my words, you can understand the importance of self-love. You can appreciate that aesthetics isn’t all that defines our state of health. Although it is natural to compare ourselves to others, you can read my life’s lessons on why comparison is futile and why we only have ourselves to blame if we continue this process. You will understand that even our health system may not support the education we need when it comes to achieving optimal health. You will become better at identifying the pitfalls that mothers fall prey to, and know how to avoid them by practicing the techniques I discuss in this book. Ultimately, you will learn how to take control of your nutrition and fitness, lending you to live a healthy life and passing on these valuable lessons to your family.

Through this book, Catalina, you will one day be a beacon of light for other mothers, helping them see how they can be the best version of themselves. I find incredible joy in knowing that you will be able to impart the same knowledge to them with an incredible amount of confidence, as you’ve been able to witness the living results in your life. You will know what it means to trust the process, giving yourself grace and accepting whatever season your body may be in. You will one day embody what it means to be a healthy, fit mom.

As your mom, I encourage you to take this knowledge but never stop learning! Keep evolving into the best version of who you are. Your food is your fuel, but so is your wisdom. Remember, you are never on a diet and you never define yourself by a number. Your mind is one of your greatest superpowers and the greatest of influences on your body. Fuel your mind with good thoughts, good education and good intentions. You can be whatever your mind thinks you can be.

Okay, Mom will step off her soapbox.

I love you forever and always, Catalina.

Mom xoxo

Introduction

As one of three girls raised by a single mother, I saw her struggling to maintain her fitness with a busy schedule and little understanding of how to take care of her health. I have vivid memories of her running around in a pair of leotards and tights, doing aerobics, drinking Diet Coke, and eating her two plain rice cakes for lunch. She was always on a fad diet, kept the refrigerator packed with nonfat food items, and was constantly tied to her scale. Her self-worth was determined by the number that read on this scale and also the one that was sewn on the back of her jeans. She was often afraid to eat and had a horrible relationship with food. Her constant struggle with her self-worth, which was tied to her unhealthy fitness practices and supplements, negatively impacted her health and the mental health of my sisters and me. My middle sister and I have maintained a close relationship over the years (she’s pictured with me below). We often talk about how difficult those younger years were for us. It is because of these personal experiences that I’m determined to not continue these dysfunctional patterns with my own daughter and work hard to be a better role model for her when it comes to health and fitness.

Unfortunately, I know many women whose mothers had the same practices of which they’re replicating unknowingly, as they haven’t had the time or resources to put toward a true understanding of fitness. Additionally, our society continues to breed this type of behavior in women. It’s not just the supplement promotions that cause dependency and false promises, but also the fad workouts and diets that typically promote dramatic results that don’t end up with long-term weight loss or health benefits. Sadly, social media has made it easier and more effective for these types of fads to be promoted, as they do this behind the picture of young fitness models whose unblemished bodies haven’t experienced childbirth, nor have they experienced the stress and demands of being a busy mom.

With these unrealistic images, mothers eventually face a dead end in their thoughtful pursuit of having a better body composition, as they fall astray to these falsifications and end up buying into the concept that they are past the point of being able to achieve their fitness goals. Without the proper education surrounding fitness, they start to put the blame on aging and hormones. Ultimately, many moms give up on the idea that it’s possible to have a sexy and healthy body after the child-bearing years altogether, and lose their motivation to pursue any form of fitness goals. They desperately need a RESET when it comes to their overall thought-process when it comes to fitness.

For many years, although growing up athletic, I fell into some of my mother’s same detrimental fitness attempts. I struggled with my weight and did my fair share of crash dieting and cardio in order to achieve my aesthetic goals. My body, although athletic, was tired of unsuccessful attempts over the years, and at the ripe age of 18, I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. This diagnosis seemed to make my fitness attempts all that more difficult to achieve. Later in my life, after having both of my kiddos and turning the age of 40, I decided to spend time trying to figure out if I could debunk the perpetual myth that it wasn’t possible to have a better body at an older age and after the childbearing years. I committed to the process of developing my postpartum physique as I wanted to compete in bodybuilding. During this process of working on my body composition after having kids, I began to more thoroughly understand the pitfalls that women fall into (especially mothers) that derail their body composition goals. I learned how to successfully avoid these pitfalls with my own body to reach my fitness goals, (what I term the REFRAME period of my life). During this process, I began to realize that the answers to avoiding these pitfalls were often not shared by the fitness community, as they were coveted as hooks to keep clients, as many fitness gurus are coaches that promote societal quick fixes to profit their businesses. I started seeing how easy it becomes for many women (especially mothers) to end up in the snares of these bad coaches and practice these vicious cycles of unhealthy fitness practices, resulting in unmet fitness goals and eventually placing the blame on aging or hormones.

Once I was able to gain my own confidence in trusting the knowledge that I had learned in my own postpartum pursuit of fitness, I was able to steer away from my old ways and develop (RESHAPE) the body composition I always wanted. And here’s the crazy thing. . . I did it in my 40s and even after having babies! It was at that point that I knew I was an honest testament to what worked. I felt empowered and knew I needed to put all of this valuable information about my fitness success into a single program and share it with all of my fellow mothers through a book, to empower them also. It was time for me to turn my motive into a reality, and so I began writing. . .

As a busy mother of two young kids, I know how time-consuming and expensive trying to achieve an education in fitness can be. This is why I was so compelled to share my fitness wisdom with mothers like you. Through my fitness journey, I’ve been able to create and fine-tune a solid fitness plan that combats all four of the pitfalls I discuss, which keep mothers from achieving their fitness goals. This program can be tailored to any busy mom regardless of where she practices her fitness and the amount of time she has to do so. My ReShapeHER program has led me to my own fitness success as well as with the many mothers I’ve had the pleasure to work with.

The ReShapeHER program can provide fitness clarity for any mother who dedicates her time to taking care of their family and has little time to invest in herself. . . especially in her fitness. Oftentimes, these unsung heroes are busy making sure their children are clothed and fed, hitting their milestones successfully, and living their best little lives, while they hope to have a successful shower and a good night’s rest at the end of the day. The bodies of these heroes have contributed to the miracle of life and all of its stages, but these mothers may feel like they don’t have fitness support when it comes to picking up the postpartum pieces, tackling the seasons that follow, as they work to achieve a better body composition postpartum.

Time that might have been typically spent rushing to the gym after work is now spent making dinner or picking up and dropping off kids at school or extracurricular activities. Even when the newborn or toddler stage has ended, the priorities of children and family always take precedence, leaving mothers with little time to figure out how to navigate fitness into their busy schedules. With the little amount of time they have, they are left to tackle the muddied waters of the fitness industry, which leaves them confused and discouraged.

Because of this, quick fixes that the fitness industry likes to serve up on a silver platter, which offer hollow promises through fad products and unrealistic timelines, become their source of fitness hope. The fitness industry is fully aware of this. It can be an expert at addressing fitness needs and filling them with shallow solutions.

With these unsuccessful solutions, it may leave a postpartum mother buying into the myth that reaching any pinnacle of great health at this stage of her life is simply not possible. The ReShapeHER program can give a mother like this the reins back when it comes to her fitness and her overall health. It can help her accomplish her fitness goals within a short period of time by helping her understand what she needs to do as it relates to her fitness practices.

Busy mothers are also easy prey for being caught in the snare of bad coaches because they know we have little time to dedicate to our fitness efforts. They take advantage of them as perpetual clients, by giving them only little bits of information over time, taking advantage of the one thing these mothers don’t have. Most busy mothers may not have the resources to hire the best experts who can help them achieve the results they’re looking for. And even if they do, many of these coaches aren’t sharing fitness information with them, that empowers them and allows them to learn how to achieve their fitness goals on their own. Because of this, mothers become victims of failed fitness attempts and the frustrations of trying to figure out what works. They can become easily discouraged, internalizing some of the harmful and negative messages that society sends about the future of a woman’s body after pregnancy and aging. Without fitness education and experience, these mothers often succumb to sadness and vulnerability when it comes to their fitness, paralyzing their abilities to achieve their optimal fitness health.

It is time to put an end to this vicious cycle! This can possibly happen with the education a postpartum mother can receive by reading this book and adopting the ReShapeHER program into her fitness journey, helping her reach her goals in as little as 4-6 weeks!(Results vary based on individual responses.)

I experienced ups and downs, pitfalls, and failures, when I began my postpartum fitness journey. However, these things all led me to the fitness success I’ve been able to achieve and share with you in this book. As you read through each page, you will be educated with a wealth of knowledge about fitness that will save you both time and money if you apply the principles of the ReShapeHER program in your fitness journey. I poured my valuable life experiences into this book in order to help you achieve the body of your dreams. It is my hope as a fellow mother that you take the pearls you learn from this book, apply them to your fitness, and also teach a fellow mother something, saving her both time and money in her fitness journey.

Fitness is a gift, and the knowledge that we obtain from it should be shared. It shouldn’t be complicated or clouded with misinformation. Mothers, and women in general, should all be helping one another to achieve our fittest lives, contributing to an overall fit and healthy world not only for ourselves but also for our daughters. I know we can all agree that postpartum mothers in our world need more knowledge about fitness that saves them time and money in order for them to achieve better personal fitness. I hope we can one day achieve that. This book is my contribution.

As a mother of a beautiful daughter who will one day be a mother herself, it is my hope that by sharing my ReShapeHER program, her generation of postpartum mothers won’t have to struggle with the unsuccessful attempts past generations have when it comes to achieving their fitness goals. It is my hope that this book is the start of a new wave of female empowerment, one that exploits the smoke in mirrors bullshit that has been spoon-feeding our past generations of mothers the fitness falsifications that have led them to failure in reaching their best body compositions and fitness goals. Enough is enough.

It is time for us to collectively raise the status of mothers through fitness education, awareness, and literacy. It is time for us to show ourselves, and our children, how to RESET our dysfunctional thought processes when it comes to fitness. It is time for us to REFRAME the way we think about what is possible when it comes to our fitness potential. And, it is time to optimally RESHAPE our bodies, by consistently practicing successful fitness habits that contribute to us reaching and maintaining our best overall health as moms. There’s no better time than now.

Cassie

The RESET

1

Fitness Success Starts with Self-Love

It is easy in the age of the Social Media Revolution to develop ideal images of what female bodies should look like, based on the curated content of societal influencers. Images that are easy on the eyes, radiant, and youthful sell. . . the aesthetics are what we see and the anticipated result of any type of product or program. The fitness industry is one that is largely focused on these aesthetics because it is assumed that if someone is healthy from the inside, their body will reflect that. The outward appearance is also what we are attracted to, with our natural senses. It’s hard to take an industry like fitness and completely change it, but what we can do is identify its faults and do our best to make it more inclusive.

How we build on this inclusivity is through education. I’ve discussed my motivation for writing this book and how I hope to teach women (mothers specifically), about how they can achieve their fittest lives. This in turn will contribute to a healthy image of what fitness can look like for mothers and ultimately define their place in this Social Media Revolution.

As mothers, we have the power to create a movement that can ultimately redefine our place in the fitness world, and this all begins with how we identify with this place within ourselves. Do we believe as mothers that we have a place in this fitness space not only for ourselves but also for our daughters who might also be mothers? Are we tired of the curated images that society has plagued us with that portray the message that only women with no childbearing experience can achieve fitness success? These questions can all be answered confidently if we have a strong sense of self-love.

As mothers, we need to take responsibility to ensure that these curated images we’re constantly being fed by society aren’t what’s defining our overall understanding of fitness. We have to be cautious, as it is easy to develop an over-fixation on the aesthetics of fitness, as we are a very visual society, and it can be easily assumed that our fitness aesthetics define our state of fitness health. We tend to forget that there are many other dimensions of health and fitness other than just the physical. . . there’s also the mental and spiritual. As mothers, and females in general, we are taught from a very early age to compare ourselves. Perhaps this teaching stems from a history of being oppressed in a male dominated society, but it can damage our ability to strengthen our position in our society and keep us from reaching our gender goals. The act of comparison is what keeps us as women, from uniting and being more of an overall force in our world.

Comparison is Futile

As a female and mother, I’ve experienced my fair share of comparison games. However, going through the process of bodybuilding in my 40s made me realize how destructive this game of comparison can be. As I graced the stage with women who had never experienced childbirth and whose bodies were young and tight, free from the scars of this experience, I was being judged on the same platform that they were. I almost became lost in my own insecurities as I had to learn to manage the disillusionment I was gaining from a sport that so heavily valued aesthetics. I had to trust myself and my abilities and carefully process my insecurities. I had to fight through the process of not allowing my jaded mindset to become my reality, derailing me from accomplishing my fitness goals.

I discuss further in this book why the act of comparison is futile when it comes to true body composition, but I also learned that it is futile when it comes to supporting any type of mental or spiritual health. It is a dirty game that devalues the significance of women and lessons our overall power in society.

This game of constant comparison is directly associated with our insecurities. We often get caught up with idealizing what others have that we may not, or feeling shame for carrying the scars of life experiences that should be deemed as a sign of heroism, but in lieu of this, it is thought of as a flaw. Oftentimes what makes the game of comparison so easy to play for many mothers is that their internal voice behind the insecurities can be loud. I know personally that the voice that screams my insecurities and doubts seems as if it’s using a megaphone inside my head. She is the voice of all of my doubts, and sometimes her main goal is to stop me from believing I am capable of achieving that which I’m pursuing.

The Negative Voice of Doubt

Over the years I’ve learned to familiarize myself with this voice and today I deem her as nameless, other than an obnoxious bitch. While at first she gained my full attention, she will now scream to a mind that has learned to compartmentalize what she’s saying and only react once her concerns have been rationalized. I’ve often wondered why this voice seems as though she can speak to me the way she does, and I can only hope that over time the volume will lessen as I’ve learned to handle it in the healthy way I’ve learned how. I’m not sure how I developed a voice that speaks this way to me about my insecurities (I’m assuming it stems from childhood trauma or my years of trying to be a perfectionist), but what I do know is that I can’t let her derail me from achieving my goals. Regardless of what she has to say, she will learn that my practice of self-love will come before ridiculing myself over my insecurities and giving in to the game of comparison.

As wicked as it can be, there’s a natural and unassuming aspect to the art of comparison. It is human nature to want to associate, relate, and feel part of something. Sharing commonalities with others is what draws us together, but not sharing these is also what sometimes tears us apart. The fitness industry can effectively bring out the commonalities of what people share but can