Mob Rules: What the Mafia Can Teach the Legitimate Businessman

PART I

LESSONS FOR A SOLDIER (EMPLOYEE)

Good morning, gentlemen, and anyone listening. This is the nine o’clock meeting of the Chicago underworld.

—Murray The Camel Humphreys, general counsel for the Chicago Mafia

LESSON 1

Make Them an Offer They Can’t Refuse: A Surefire Way to Get Hired

HOW does someone get in with the Mafia?

First, you have to want in, like any other potential employee who wants a job. In New York, it helps if someone in your immediate family belongs to one of the five crime families, like your dad or uncle. If so, chances are you’ll end up in that particular family.

If your immediate family has no Mafia ties, and mine didn’t, you’re a cowboy, street guy, or free agent.

The Mafia has headhunters everywhere, just like corporations. If you’re a street earner with a good name, a mobster from any one of the five families will find you. Once you’re found, the mobster will put a claim on you. But the claim has mutual benefits. The mobster acquires a new source of income, while the street earner is invested with the collective power of the family, allowing him the potential to earn more than he ever did independently.

Unlike in the corporate world, once claimed, i.e. hired, you don’t get a weekly paycheck, medical benefits, paid vacation, or sick days. You get shit, only a piece of what you earn.

What boss wouldn’t hire a worker who expects to keep only a percentage of what he or she earns?

Tell any potential employer you don’t want a paycheck, zilch, only a piece of what you earn, and you won’t have to sit through many job interviews. Sure, some top companies might reject your offer if they’re too selective, but a company that’s hungry won’t.

If you think this Mafia hiring method doesn’t apply to the corporate world, you’re wrong.

I once stood up for a rich Wall Street guy on a beef. After I straightened it out, he had his limo pick us up and drive us to Atlantic City. On the way there, I asked him how he got his start on Wall Street.

He said that he started at a brokerage firm on Long Island. I walked in off the street and asked for the manager, he explained. All I wanted was a chance to prove myself. No set salary, just one month with a desk and a phone.

The manager was amused by his chutzpah and told him to start as a cold-caller since he hadn’t yet taken the Series 7 exam qualifying him as a stockbroker. In that first month, his leads generated over ten thousand bucks in brokerage fees for the firm. Before his first year was up, he passed the broker’s exam and became the company’s top earner.

He exuded confidence, and the manager who hired him saw that self-confidence translating into profit.

[Chris] Rosenberg was a small-time drug dealer but DeMeo liked his style. Chris was tenacious, cocky, and determined to make a sale.

—Mobsters: Roy DeMeo

I laughed, and said to him, We start out the same way in the Mob, strictly commission.

I once read that Warren Buffett, one of the world’s richest men, started out just like us, offering his sweat for a small piece of what he earned for the company. Imagine hiring Warren Buffett for beans?

Confidence is an asset, something that doesn’t show on a résumé. Make contact with people. Show your ambition. Let them know you’re a go-getter. Everyone’s looking for a good investment; that next investment should be you.

LESSON 2

It’s the Principle!: When to Make a Point

THIS guy Alex owned a restaurant in Manhattan. He bet football and got in over his head with a bookie I knew.

Every night, Alex’s restaurant was packed, reservations only, yet he continued to claim that he didn’t have my friend’s payments. So the bookie sent three bruisers to wreck his joint.

I don’t care if he offers you cash on the spot, the bookie told the bruisers before they left for the restaurant. It’s too late; it’s now a question of principle.

Sure enough, Alex tried to square up with the three bruisers as soon as they walked in, just before closing time. Following my friend’s orders, the bruisers refused Alex’s cash and wrecked the place.

Alex eventually paid his debt. I asked my friend why he didn’t accept the cash the night Alex had offered it. With hundreds of debtors, he explained to me, it was best to have a reputation as a businessman who stands on principle.

If a bank never repossessed a car, he told me, who would make a car payment?

Most of us operate with a take the money and run attitude. How many of us are willing to stand on principle and accept a short-term loss to reap long-term benefits?

We can’t be letting these fucking assholes play us for fools. That gets around on the street, we’re out of business.

—Mobster Carmine Genovese

Don Salvatore Maranzano was one of the first American Mafia bosses. He studied the Roman Empire and structured his crime family after the old Roman legions, with capos, or captains, assuming the role of legates, men who rule over a legion of soldiers. He even emulated Julius Caesar, establishing himself as emperor over his captains. Ironically, Maranzano was assassinated by his own men, just like his role model Caesar. But while in power, Maranzano stood firm on principle, also like Caesar.

Julius Caesar seized power in Rome after a bloody civil war against his arch-nemesis Pompey. After losing the war, Pompey sought refuge in Egypt. When Pompey arrived there, he was viciously murdered. The assassins then presented his head as a gift to Caesar.

You’d think Caesar would’ve been flattered by foreigners going to such lengths to please him, presenting him with the head of his enemy. Instead, Caesar promptly put Pompey’s assassins to death. To Caesar, it was a question of principle. Although Pompey was his sworn enemy, he was still a Roman citizen, and no one had the right to take the life of a Roman citizen except the Roman government, i.e. Caesar. Had Caesar condoned the murder of a Roman citizen, where would it end?

The Mafia, like Caesar, avenges the unsanctioned death of a member, even if that member was hated and had it coming. Because of this, very few members have been murdered without a boss’s permission.

The Mafia will stand on principle (when it’s practical) for the sake of long-term profit, and simple survival.

LESSON 3

Why Are the Mobsters in the Newspapers So Old?: Love What You Do and You’ll Never Work a Day in Your Life

THERE’S no such thing as a nine-to-five wiseguy. All those old mobsters photographed in the newspapers could have retired years before those embarrassing mug shots were taken, but they loved what they did and couldn’t stop.

Louisiana boss Carlos Marcello and Chicago boss Anthony Accardo each had millions stashed away, enough to live wealthy for a hundred lifetimes, yet both were well into their eighties and still entrenched in The Life.

Bonanno boss Joe Massino was a multimillionaire. While on the lam in Pennsylvania, he walked into a pharmacy and boosted a bottle of aspirin. This small caper led to his arrest, a bigger headache than the one he needed the aspirin for. Why would a man worth millions, with bags of cash delivered to him every day, steal a measly bottle of aspirin? Because that’s what Joe did. And he loved it.

The thing you’ve got to understand about Jimmy [Burke] is that he loved to steal. He ate and breathed it. I think if you ever offered Jimmy a billion dollars not to steal, he’d turn you down and then try to figure out how to steal it from you. It was the only thing he enjoyed. It kept him alive.

—Henry Hill, quoted in Nicholas Pileggi’s Wiseguy

Sammy The Bull Gravano was worth over ten mil. Although he murdered more people than I can invite to a wedding, the government let him skate and keep the bulk of his dirty fortune in exchange for informing on his associates. Gravano was praised as an American hero by judges, prosecutors, and law enforcement officers, all of whom got a little bump in their careers after he helped them convict other mobsters. After getting a second chance at freedom, Gravano started up an international drug ring, embarrassing everyone who had called him a