Piano Conductor Score Sketches, Music and Lyrics Mostly by: (in alphabetical order) Michael Abbott, Douglas Bernstein & Denis Markell, Craig Carnelia, Martin Charnin, Ronny Graham, Marvin Hamlisch, Brian Lasser, Michael Leeds, Thomas Meehan, Sarah Weeks, Billy Weeden, David Finkle & Sally Fay Dialogue and Segues by Martin Charnin, Douglas Bernstein & Denis Markell Entire Production Conceived and Originally Directed by: (in alphabetical order) Martin Charnin ‘NOTICE: DO NOT DEFACE! + Should you find ie necessary to mark ‘cues or cuts, use a soft black lead pencil only. NOT FOR SALE. + This book is rented for the period specified in your contract. It remains the property of MUSIC THEATRE INTERNATIONAL 421 West 54th Street New York, NY 10019 (212) 541-4684 Copyright © 1987 by Martin CharninThe “No-Frilts” Revue Corrections for Piano/Vocal Score Corrections for Privacy: When voce) parts spit, the lower part and lower staff is the Women’s vocal Tine. . ii bars 3 & 7, the bes notes should read All grand staff notes ere synth cues until 4 bers before rehesrsai letter B. | ber before rehearse! letter £, the bass note shoul be fy At reneers | letter F the G 1 the piano enc the Gy inthe vocal are correct7 The "No-Frills" Revue/Stools music and lyrics by Manin Chamin = "The "No-Frills" Revue cos - tume... © 1987 Martin Chernin. 2all youre gon - naget.te thyme works like that's the diz-zy peiens welll take you to-- 3_fno-thing butthrills at the "No - Frills" ‘We'll pay our back - ers back 4 bun-dred “teabe-fore they do at “Les Miz." (YAHH!) m= shines half as bright as ours!) 2 One a ~~and it's all be-ing done folks for bup - kas it it! - I run— folks for bup - kas... “Stools” ‘Poco Mosso 6 "stools" © 1982 by Martin Chernin— Now you can do a re-vue_ with-out sets and you can do a rp-vue—with-gut tas (know of oe) M2 ed + F 7 do a re-vue_with-out Sama (ame ta fo props and you can do with-out puns,— with-out rep live with-out things like your BT Prep 6 i 2 jokes a-bout nuns,— with-out lang-uage that brings out the cops and you can ‘trum-pets and strings and a comic with big flop-py cars _ and you can vag? als do are-vue-with-out stars, with-out your Li- zas and your Mick-eys and your do are-vue—on that would be pgr-fect in your church-es ,and your vee ng fe in hrch- es ayejot you don't need, hun-dreds of lights, Li but butyou got a rar sin-gles bar! You got a_ stool: you got a for-eign car! You got a eha You got two stools in apile. You got a stool: You gota rich guy and a chauf-fa! You got 5 Peal an-a-lyst's so-fa. You got a stool: ev-er-y skit and if woise comes to woise- you got = F. T set for ev-'ry num-ba for uu T 10Gp had Coe Ki place you can sit! , you can do a re-vue—with-oug _ songs and you can are inl? Vv 23 BING FS make it ajl work_with-oug clothes and you can still have some noise with no ae ae * f RSE F th «lll = SS —, gitls dressed like_boys — and no boys in those tight —_ pant - p re "g ae a S57 5 (F , o + Freee SARs ia ¥ ee 1 + F |rGas qT You are Figeishe voute nk ugar | q | junk, xcept do a re-voe-with-out, you can-not get through-with- out its] > rt F simp -ly no show- with-a-out, there's no S. R, O.— with-out T ia ‘pith-out soo ~'woO-Woo ~ WOD ~ WOO" WOO- WOO-WOO- WOOTa wt My Reunion Prayer music and lyrics by Bill Weeden, David Finkle, Meekly and Sally Fay J=130 (Sop. 2nd X only) © 1987 by Twelve Tone Music. All rights reserved. rai i j i i(voice-over) / Ko —_— (Play jf absence of synth.) a Z /os loco _yamp til cue - VO: “Wacka-wack-boom-boom"——lord, let my room-mate not be chair-man of a this is my re-Wack-a-wack-a boom - boom!" Women: Ob, ~) $ hair, All: This is my re -ee rm Women: At this heav-y du - ty ce- le - bra = tion let me have the best and bright-est Let it please come up in con-ver- —EEEE i BusWe're a- bout to build a se-cond house. 18OOO ion prayer, my re-un-ion prayer, oh, ‘my re-un-ion ion prayer - All: Let no-bo-dy see I'm ap- pre - ‘That I'm spend-ing ten times what 1} | Look- ing like I've made it is ex - pen- sive. legato fudged things on my ques-tion - aire: Women:mare, Men: said I.had a pied - a - tere right next door to subito zi 1Be /p (pleLord, get me through this week - end that I can’t af- See me through the whole 23 with growing intensity and Tl pay youIkmowa guy at La accle in 2 i (300: prayer, my re-un-ion prayer.| Squscns Being With Me Sve a Bue ols UL eS sae Oy music by Brian Lasser lyrics by Michael Leeds Molto Rubato No one (colla voce) ‘The friends that I had Music @1983 by Brian Lasser. lyrics ©1983 by Michsel Leeds 257—= No one will date me. \ [ i | Al i i = Do you have a pet? ‘An-i-mals hate me. So, [ve spentsometime by my~don't have a se sad to de - press - ingPer- xy Co- mo on ‘Ludes. D) ¢ - ven tried self - help books I've heard peo - ple re - com- mend, books like tT T tT r ©. K, Youre Not So Hot” Tt I read was"How To Be YourOwn Best Friend;”helps when you're on - ly friend you've got!i Once when 1 was young - er, my dear Mo - ther told me, "Hon, T T think I should pre - pare you for the worst. T peo - ple say "You're bor - ing, you're de - press - ing, youre no fun,’~ ber that your Mo - ther said long F that it first!” youve hat - ed r this song Fbet - ter, ‘cause it's Sub_—4 Bu3 Pule SAL on reek 9" Someone's Got To Do It od Last couse e re 4. ‘ 3 smnusic and lyrics by Michael Abbott, Sarah Weeks ~ ie Well Bono ied 0 and Martin Charnin Marcia Irritat d=115 ot BS i S268! some-one's got t0 do it 228 EF ne-one's got to do it. ¥Rome-one's got to spin un- til the ‘AL: Some-one's got to do it. Some-one's got to do it. . Some-one's got to spoil it so it ie Bi rey) Gna Fim 1987 by Otay Music Corp, Michael Abbott, reh Weeks & Martin Charain. 36‘aOSZi4 apin and bust the bub- ble. "Some-one's got to do it or it toss a lit-te mon-key wrench in, Some-one's got to do it or it i Bens} Be mc)? Buxsd‘Someone's got to do it. , , Strip a-way the pa-tience ‘til you're left with none che ce apn } He = r Some - one's got to put the kinks in, find the ar - mor, (Prt the chinks in: Ayeo , ad awon't get go Some-one's got to do it or it Cem? er =? ? —We-— are thethom in your side, the signe in your Abe Tes eb 27 We are the fly i oint-ment, the bee in yo net, the ants at your ex ly in your § It, your Rese your pic - nic, the wasp by B = the bug up your— ed a a a cue: "OK, that about does it." vamp til cue: "... unless it's going wrong you ain't got it right.” Some-one's got to do it Some-one's got to do it So much to ac-com-plish and we've just be - Fid- dle with the wack un - til the train won'tSome - one’s got to fan the fi- re, set thetap and trip the wi - re. Some - one's got to bite the bul-let, take you by the chain and pull it. — Some-one's got to do it or it won't get done. Some-one's got, to do_it or_it as ) | vamp til cue: "See you real soon.” heThe "False" Ballad d =70 rubato MAN: When I WOMAN: Tell me! think of all colla voceF Do it! Do it! Pompously - i Some-one's got to do it Some-one's got to do it 3 s Ebs aie ro it TE # a Bn wm ho uo & do it, do it, do it, block it! Some-one's got to be the cloud that blocks the spay Dey G6 a) 2 Some - one's got to take the tou-ble, find the pin and bust the bub - ble. 7Some-ones got to do it or it won't, Some-one's got to do it or it won't, or it won't, FPrivacy c music and lyrics by Craig Carnelia poco rubato Al My lov-er's in the bed-room— My uy © 1987 by Craig Cernelielov - e's in the den—____ And that's theway— it Gracefully rubato Moderate2 _d=90 should be now and then—— $$ I's good to be— a-way from you, myown.— 4B— RS Toknow— youre near,__yet = = SS It's good to wor - ry— with-out— hav- ing you ask: “Are you F - ugor = "It's o - kay."—— — oO —, a-way— from you, my own, —_— 52Though S SF 7, nei-ther of. us means to cha - per-one.—— S, — SF nei-ther of— us means__ to cha - per-one———whatIm— dream whatIm— dream as ing. For in some day-dreams you're just sim - ply not there. t i For in some day-dreams you're just sim - ply not there. t | Pegg 53 Sleol 5hSS Toknow— youre near,— yet from you, — my own.— — know that 'm—— a-lone-— Turbulent but soft > (light accent) = + = 5 Pedal every 2 bars etn ey es 35empireSome-times I cry and I wishI were a-lone,___ “ail you're Sa = Some-times I cry and I_ wish I were a-lone, _______ ahd youre au > ‘all $l ‘ll All58Ss ~ ~~ makes the heart grow fond - er— we've been shown. — F —, = 7, makes the hear grow fond - er__we've been shown. BS good tohold__ you and tocount____ you Fs iH But, thoughI But, thoughI tempo ws, love you, there are times, thereare_days___ to see = love— you,— there are times,— thereare—days—— 10 see fF 60and know youre near, yet. know that Im——_a- lone. oT S i and know youre near, yet know that Im—_a- lone. =It's good to be— a-way— fromyou, I's good to be— a-way— fromyou, = my | i # rit,I H - ty A Brand New Hammer music and lyrics by Bill Weeden, David Finkel, and Sally Fay — D Cus CO Freely (but with intense dedication) —_ bia Alla Chitarra and sweetl F colla voce mp $ Play only in the absence of synth/guitar G right here in my hand to-day, ham - mer r ft snide > & —, © ham-mer—— a strong new ham-mer right herein my hand to-day, ‘I said, ‘Twelve Tone Music. ~ ights reserved. eu 9at ad be a ball-peen ham-mer right here in my £ a Be hand to-day Td sellittothe Pen-ta-gon, Td sell it tothe Pen-ta-gon for ten thous-and tous F » Hunbitly4 d= 130 eres If with synth, Lh. only 65{ j be - right here in my hand. to-day,, j right here in my hand to-day, —_________right bere in my hand to-day, and with that “th E Ta speak at Har-vard \ ew ™ bell curve, ‘Td have a theo-ry of e-co- nom - ics. ? “new | Td have a theo-ry ofe-co nom -= $b oS Busi-ness School__ Td geton the lec-ture cir-cuit at twent-y thous-a ? Busi-ness School Td geton the lec- ture cir- cuit.pub- lish - ing rights ight here in my Td get it to & 69teamher. up with Spring - steen, yA for a guest shot onthe vid-e-o. Td sell it as a for a wend-y newfor the first six months. Cc ¥ Cc lit-tle bit's yours and a lit-tle bit more is Te looked at life from both sides now, from rich and poor and "Oh, wow" theright here in your hand to-day.At ac you can't go wrong. 3 ‘You can save theja. You can ban the and youre not in and youre not with kooks!el Puff, theMag - ic Dra - gon, SF ] sell-ing beach - front on 7 dos and he — givesWe Have To Sing This Song music and lyrics by Douglas Bernstein ~ & Denis Markell “Hammer" Play-off : \ { “We Have To Sing This Song" Freely show was put to-geth-er, olla voce © 1987 by Douglas Bernateyy Q deals Merkel 76sent out the call, Ev'-ry wri-ter and com-pos-er, they gave us theirall. Ev'-ry song that was sub-mit-ted was sen - sa-tion-al, was fun... that is, ex - cept forput us in an awk-ward po - si - tion now we sort of, kind of, have to sing. —Al- more deliberately less deliberately though this fel-low art-ist is-n't. blame-less we think it might be wise to leave him” Ne 8 =‘> Tempo di familiaroso 2] mp (but proudly)80 but he's friend - ly withMy friend's song was first - = EdMoo - kie's was kook - y; that's what our di -H Alle Gv’ - ry bo - dy!) We're al - most through this Fea nencould - ‘ve asked Irv-ing Ber - > if he'd had lunch 7just been a lit- te more cleb- ber this would be a song by An - drew Lloyd = as just asked (mum - ble TUF(mumble mumble mutter mutter) almost proudly song! ca Fr r Rey 4\ ham \ - f nee by wey J .cot I Know Where The Bodies Are Buried ‘ ‘music and lyrics by Martin Charnin “We Have To Sing This Song” Play-off “Brechtian" Tango é = 115 “Bodies” = sub. IP ae Corn © 1987 by Martin Charnin. 89Imow who does what © towhom and why andwhere and when, NEin-to who's for-bid-den twink- ie I's more in-tox-ic- at-ing than the 92stuff they're al-ways spritz-ing at the Bloom-ie's per-fume bar. In pri-vate Slow! they all want to choke me. Inpub-lic all they do is stoke me, for I know - ? Ff (fF D NE” noon. time some-one's al ways sent me pos - ies. OG I 93rare-ly pay for break - fastor for Junch ‘or brunch ‘or booze. poke the high-est rollers, A > >en - do. jy ig- n't child-ren laugh-ing or an GB > & > > ir “ttl Y sau-tumn leaf of mo-ther-hood that gets and keeps me bigh To know who YouKnow-Who's" af fairs were or what Ca- pote’s ‘answered prayers were. Yes, 1 know ww ITE crc To“Tiknow who Shirley Maclaine’s ‘coming back as." “SAP AlinLG) with increased rig I file each pe-ca-dil-lo twixt the sheet or ‘tween the pil-low of the > > slowly Youd bet-ter hide the scrapes you've Pike 3 for Timow where the been in. You'd bet-ter bum your din-y lin- en, { oTvamp til cué’...and I won't tell on you.”Tippy-Tap music by Marvin Hamlisch lyries by Martin Charmin ("Tippy-Tap") ‘Molto Rubato (Like Gypsies) => time for the dance! Yes, yes, there's time for the dane ina a >z> SiS cas> Music ©1987 by Marvin Hamlisch ryries © 1987 by Mertin Charnin 99ad lib. space that I as a pro-fess-ion-al danc-er can look at and say with-out fear of be-ing 7 c_3 con-tra-dict-ed, is simp-ly sub - lime for the dance. Space that re-duc - es movement to flvid, un-man-nered line and therefore eLisnisates all the sham in dance and there's a lot of it, and all the A space that is me-ta- fi 200 -phor-ic-ly a cup of real caf-fein-at-ed cof-fee from Co-lum-bi-a, not Brim, or Tast-er's Choice, F? ad lib. arp. or that gar-bage from Gen-er- al Foods, and that has all that or-ange and cin-na-min ‘Yes, this space would warm the cock-les of her heart, if she were a - ————— | : TI Bra “of The cho-1e - 0 - graph-er. ‘Who?i cesses oO” ee zs fa SSS Se Fe SS SS ea ev-en con-ceiv-a-bly pos-si-ble that one of the wo-men right here on this ver-y stage to-mipht we = se =| (Especially one of the talkerones) will be singled out by a major motion picture company for a lead- ing role op-po- site Mich-ael Doug-las, or the Ne-der-land-er Or- gan-i-za-tion _ 10272 ty or some-bo-dy €-qual-ly gor-geous on a - con-na the dance. Well, which dance shall it cor *cer ~ “ortereer No. No. be? The Po-lon-aise? © The Pe-tron - el-la? The in-sin-u-at-ing Pa-lais No, no! Glide? Then per-haps the dance in which the wo-men hike up their skirts and kick a lot and act "bawdy in. What sbout the one that's sort ofa French sailor's dance where the guy drags the stl pe 203shit out of one an-oth-er to the sound of an a ‘a-round on the floor and they beat the Bigger and more abrupily 204Af-ter all is sung and done, uw iit 2 = ———— = Soft Shoe Tempo 4 =115 ul 3 g Tip - py-Tip - py Tap - py Tip - Py- (nA 205Tap - py Tip - py-Tap Ilove the tap dance! Tip - py-Tip - py Tap - py Tip - py - Tep- py Tip - py-Tap Tove the ? 106peo- ple clap ‘n peo- ple you're tap-pin' peo- pl ings al - ways hap - pen when you Good things al - ways: ¥ aa 107shuf-fle hop step lap ball change shuf-fie hop step lap fa-lapfa-lap tap fa - lap fa-lap fa-lap ball change ball change ball change tap tap ballchange ball change tap tap_ step step step hop sh step brish step step hop shuf-fle hop step heel step briish step step hop shuf-fie hop step heel step briish step step ball change 6 One=dnd- a-two-dnd-a-three-dnd-a-four five- dad-a- six-dhd-a-sev-en and eight. 12five-dhd-a-six-ahd-a-sev-en eight. el 2 ‘Yag-gid-dy ya-gid-dy ya - gid-dack. Dab - dah Ya-gid-dy -ya-gid-dy ya - gid-dack Ya-gid-dy ya-gid-dy ya - gi-dack. 2 ‘Ya-did-dy ya-gid-dy ya - gid-dack Ya- gid- dy ya- gid-dy ya-gid-dy ya-gid-dy 2 113yargld-dy ya-gld-dy ya-gld-dy ya-gld-dy One 2 2 Gq Tip - py-Tap t . bowl of Mom - ma’s chick - en soup for snif - fles.— f f‘Tip - py-Tap is sweet-erthan the I. R.S. guy say f f fos116d=140 ® C— L iO cri-ti-cal point. in the show. We've done the sketches, the danc - es, the wit ee * * ~, ‘You've seen the (nine) of us shine— * just like "Cho-rus Line." We'_» aii "S>F | mF SF 7 a, Al S all of us worked off our buns. 4 Butthere is one thing we still have-n't - ¥ rato make to - night be-come a bo-na-fide re - oie os (Synth{ arp] Fm7(b5) arps.)) aS BA and they sing our one bal - lad fc ebro (aay Mey oe tet 2 ry Kone OF vamp ‘til cue: "Who sings the ballad tonight?” a a eeIn The Quiet of Your Arms music and lyrics by Martin Charmin Gently 4 =95 Play only in absence of synth. In the © qui-et of yourarms—————— —_— - shelt-er from my pain ————— In the qui-et of your arms ————— 120 ©1976 by H.P-L, Commnications, Tac-I can come to life a- gain —______— —— Ne pri-vate lit- te wars. ‘That I wage through-out the day, com yerBl L cide to drift a - way————— Jn the know-ing you are there— new be - gin-nings can be - gin fus-ion or de-spair ———— for your arms wor't let them in 1 322and find cour-age there to deal with myver-y ne-cess-a- Ty splen - did In the ver-y ne-cess-ar-y qui-et of your arms oO splen - did qui-et of yourBP meron G Wt. ploy JetAnere - ful Boke” (ae ao Yes, We Have The Manuscripts: Whet sont ‘The First Musical: Jerry Herman's "West Side Story" Ts Tonyman ot music by Ronny Graham 2 Wh Beth rk lyrics by Ronny Graham and Martin Charmin = Jolly March = 115 ONY: To: ny-Ma - oi We just made up te | called To - ny-Ma - ri | Iyrics © 1985, by Ronny Graham & Martin Charnin. ‘ahem. 125 Mincin MV 10AS be Ronny Grié Z a a—_____.Tae back-wards they fit_i the cart _be - fore - STS <> laugh we don't the give a Po nyAndwe am one peach of a >prde® fp Coe Aude AIAG (@ Yes, We Have The Manuscripts: The Second Musical: Noel Coward's Fiddler on the Roof mum-ble a Kad-dish in Yid-dish,—— DE: or music by Ronny Graham Lyrics by Ronny Graham and Martin Charmin arranged by David Gainesno long-er know forI'm go- ing quite mad-dish be- cause of the goy-em who teats us so bgd-dish and be - ing so poor that we — can't buy a ra-dish! G: We're so poor that ev-‘ry night we hear that sir -en =~cool “here" is where I would be from, Eee: sing - ing faster_2 "dee-dl-ee, dy-dl-ee, bid-dl-ee, bum" 132rushing would-n't be a—— po - grom: from Rus-sia_ I would sim-ply take the Steppes and move a - way.—————__— 1333 g a 8 Fi A FP cf i 2 i and Pom: A private fjordShab-bis in Gay would - n't that be— aYes, We Have The Manuscripts The Third Musical: Stephen Sondheim's "Annie" music by Ronny Graham lyrics by Ronny Graham and Martin Charnin d=130 were "O"'s and her: & s a a 3 i the heart of a onsteam - in’ har-lot, the schem - in’ har-lot, the steam - in’ har-lot, the cresc. poco a poco 239molto rubato Now that's real- ly an— a mis - ter2___ (Sobs) 5 WARBUKS* Pret-ty or-phans, (vith synth, R.H. col 7 a x “VeeAvie: Ea - sy, mi - ster! Back off, Sy, sere 2 orphan, pret = fy bust - er! Hold it rightthere, skin - head! No way! 143I. mean slink-y or-phans, make that pret-ty or-phan. I dig pret-ty or-phans, Ge digs) (he means) uaBruskly @ = 100 TenutoThere are two kinds a bums zy = 16bum who leads and the bum_ who is > = gd. The leader says + =fi d=130eed rubato a ANNiz: Good ev - ‘ning, friend! a ™~ a a col voce IM_| with careless abandond = 145 3X. eid) op subito pp (every time) 2g¢ = 130 NI Apassionata-y ‘ AL Kiss your friend and lets have a hap - PY end, ws —— 150 :wet \ Gott Q vamp til cue:"Did you hear tbat!” vw: Sand -y inthe parkIt Hasn't Been Easy L music and lyrics by Bill Weeden, David Finkle, ; and Sally Fay Steady 4 d =95 (with forced modesty) — : tr 2» —— ~vamp til bows are complete 3 Ithas-n't been ea-sy hand-ling suc - cess. 153 = = “Teste climb-ing a3 moun-tain in aver-y tight dress. You get all this mon-ey. You think you'll be Trt but ifs a pri-son, small things like stand-ing in line, like do-ifg the Iaun-dry and drink-ing cheap 2 2 A ‘And just be-ing av'-rage, you give that up, too. Suc- cess is-n't tT Tt f i- ashbut what cn you do? It has-n't been ca-sy hand-ling suc - cess. Have I come through it? ~ The an-swer is: "Yes!" They said it would change me. How fool-ish they were, I'm still the same Tr > 8 Just ask my chauf - feur. T still se the old gang; I told tem I = 1557 would. You can wien you pur-chase your old neigh-bor - hood. Of course, I don't _ D / live there. My law-yer said, "No!" SucyGess is-n't_ea-sy un-less youre a 156hand-ling suc- ‘Youre of-ten in tur-moil and men-tal dis - tress. ‘You run to your Pent-house so no offe will know. ey 3 2 ‘You cry in the sau-na where it does-n't B.7 7 With all of this pres-sure you do what you can: I dic-tate my 7 2 Ikeep up my tan. ‘Tm psych-ie- ly bat-tered, ¢~mo-tion- lly Bolero Maestoso bat its not all that hard. ‘a : scarred. Suc-cess is-n't_ ea-sy~ 7 ob - sessed with ca - cer, but you must have 1583 youre there and we're here. 3 but, nev-er-the - less, it real-ly is su-per a 3 159