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MALCOLM GLADWELL
ALAN PARTRI DGE
AND WHAT GOOGLE GLASS DOESN T
WANT YOU TO DO. SO WE DI D I T.
...NOWRAISE A GLASS TO THE END OF THE YEAR WITH
JAMES MARSDEN
EE EEAASSSSTTT // DDE DE DE DEE E CE CE CEMMB MB MB R ER ER ERR 2201 01 013333 MA MA MA MA MAA MMAA MM NNNNN ATT AT AAAA HHHISS IS S IS BBBBBBBBBB S EES ES EESS EESTTT
WE MEET THE I F YOU ONLY
MAKE I T THE
STORY ON
PAGE 126
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2 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T HI S WAY I N
BEFORE WE BEGI N
ESQUIREGENTLEMENSEVENING
THE CAVE, CONRAD DUBAI
T
he latest Esquire Gentlemens
Evening was held at The Cave
in the recently opened Conrad
Dubai.
The Cave, designed as a modern stone
cave / cellar setting and stocked with
more than 1,500 international wines, is the
swish newbar at the Conrad Dubai.
Sponsoring the evening were
Glenmorangie, Casillero del Diablo,
Heineken, Movado and Concord watches,
the latter of whomgave away one of their
newpieces to a guest. Pictured above
right is local TVpresenter, Nour Aldin Al
Yousuf, presenting the watch to Gareth
Davies, accompanied by Eric Sturma,
regional director at MGI Luxury Group. Al
Yousuf was also unveiled on the evening as
the face of Concord in the Middle East.
Entertainment was provided by the
Johanna Sandell Duo.
2 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T HI S WAY I N
BEFORE WE BEGI N
O
ne day not too long ago, MalcolmGladwell
defended himself. Hed been accused of
promoting claptrap in the form of the 10,000-
hour rule, the primary subject of his book
Outliers. He posted a response on The New Yorkers website
that included this sentence: Theres a reason the Beatles
didnt give us The White Albumwhen they were teenagers.
Well, yes. Before the Beatles could give us The White
Album, they had to achieve disorientating success. They had to
take a lot of drugs. They had to learn to hate one another. They
had to experience the centrifugal energies of the Sixties. They
had to live. What we infer fromwhat Gladwell wrote, however,
is that they had to practice, and were able to make The White
Albumonce they passed the 10,000-hour threshold.
It is a notion both obvious and preposterous, one that
could be taken seriously only by Tiger Moms and other
anxious exponents of the meritocracy. It is also utterly
characteristic of its author. Gladwell has been treading the
line between the obvious and the preposterous for years;
yet instead of being dismissed out of hand, he has become
the most influential journalist of his generation, a village
explainer embraced as a kind of philosopher. His success is
not accidental; his success, indeed, is grounded in the fact
that he has made success his subject and has learned from
his heroes. In all of Gladwells books, people succeed when
they master a skill that seems inconsequential but becomes
necessary. The skill that Gladwell has mastered is the
inevitable act of misdirection that has become his signature:
THE GLADWELL FEINT
The Gladwell Feint is MalcolmGladwells 100mph
heater we knowits coming, and theres still
nothing we can do about it. In all of his books and
in all of his stories, there is a moment when he
questions the obviousobviously. He tells us we
have it wrongand we knowwe have it right.
He surprises us and his surprise fulfills our expectations.
He makes us anxious that we dont know something only
to assure us that weve known it all along. He flatters us by
seeming to challenge us, and then makes the challenge so
simple that we feel smart when we get it right.
Gladwell is not the only writer to write explanatory
journalism calibrated to flatter the sensibilities of his
readership so does David Brooks and, to a lesser extent,
Michael Lewis. But Gladwell does it almost exclusively.
In his most recent book, David and Goliath, he writes about
the power of the underdog, telling story after story that
amounts to some variation of the childrens-book staple: And
that little boy grew up to be King David! But thats not the
Gladwell Feint. The Gladwell Feint in David and Goliath is
that the book is not really about underdogs at all but rather
highly successful people who can teach us something about
success. Gladwell might be suspect as a philosopher, but his
credentials as the [prolific 19th-century American author]
Horatio Alger, Jr. of late-period capitalism are unsurpassed.
He does not get up to eighty grand a speech because he
makes his audiences feel bad about themselves. He gets
that kind of money because in seeming to demystify the
meritocracy, he makes his audiences feel both assured about
their own standing and anxious enough to go home and
make their kids practice, practice, practice.
Hes supposed to be a nice guy. He says that he never
wants to write a negative story, and he has applied the
Gladwell Feint to counterintuitive causes like pit bulls
and three-strikes laws. He is best when he is worst when
he strays from his thesis and allows himself to be
merely good-hearted. But there is a noir thriller
to be written about a kid whose mother reads
Outliers and subsequently forces him to practice
the violin for 10,000 hours. He comes looking
for Gladwell.
The kids there not to play him a sonata.
HasMalcolmGladwell, themaster of popphilosophy, runout of tricks?
BY TOMJUNOD
TOREAD
WHAT
GLADWELL
HIMSELF HAS
TOSAY, SEE
PAGE 140
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2 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T HI S WAY I N
BEFORE WE BEGI N
T
he reason Hollywood films
are so dominant at the
global box office is just an
accident of geography. No
European indigenous filmindustry
had a population of more than 60-70
million, and America has four times
that. Also, they were also at the
forefront of making movies in the
1920s and 30s along with the French.
In a funny way, its only places like
France, Korea, and Taiwan that have
maintained their independence.
And Europe has never managed to
integrate a distribution system.
Another accident that stopped
non-English language cinema was
subtitles. Once the VCR came out,
people thought they could see it
on tape, but then subtitles are too
small on tape for a big experience,
so people stopped watching. And
each advance in technology is a
simplifying of a process; the more
advanced you get the more simple
the movies become, and now
America is largely making movies
for parts of America.
There are a lot of stories that
could be told out here, and the
Middle East has a balancing role to
play. Finding stories of their own
and balancing a lot of the perception
of the Middle East that is currently
out there is important. A lot of
times when I watch the news, its
very limited. You dont get a joyous
experience, you dont get any sense
of culture; you just get the politics
and burqas.
Going back, Peter OToole as
Lawrence of Arabia was a huge
breakthrough. Omar Sharif and his
Filmdirector JimSheridanonthedominanceof Hollywoodandthe
important rolethat flmmakersintheMiddleEast havetoplay
movies as well, but it doesnt seemto
happen as much now. Following the
discovery of oil, the Arab character
has become darker, mysterious, and
dangerous, not as romantic as Rudolph
Valentino in The Sheik. Its just a
strange portrayal, and I think its time
to change it back a little.
If you took the stories that are being
told via American films, 99 percent are
on one side of the see-saw, and theres
only one percent towards the rest of
the world, and it seems way out of
balance. These kinds of festivals and
competitions help restore a sense of
balance, as starting points.
As told to Matt Pomroy. Jim Sheridan is
a judge at the Dubai Film Festival this
month see page 138 for more
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3 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T HI S WAY I N
BEFORE WE BEGI N
Whatsit liketobeaBrit workinginLA?Esquirebashestogether the
headsof ArmandoIannucci (IntheLoop, Veep) andStephenMerchant
(TheOfce, HelloLadies) tofndout
THE NETWORKS
StephenMerchant: There are endless executives
whose jobs I am never entirely clear on. They are all
called vice-president and they all have interesting and
important ideas on the one day they visit the set. On
the American version of The Ofice, Steve Carells hair
changed between series one and two. I assume there
were lengthy conversations about that.
ArmandoIannucci: I suspect there was a change of VP
and he wanted to turn everything around.
THE CREW
StephenMerchant: Do you find theres a lot more crew?
Im sure its twice as large. It seemed to me that the
people who make lunch are not the people who bring
sandwiches inbetween lunch.
ArmandoIannucci: Thats like the diference between a
manager and an agent.
THE GLAMOUR
StephenMerchant: Armando, Im not going to lie to you,
Im driving a convertible. I am. Im in Los Angeles, why
wouldnt I?
ArmandoIannucci: I wouldnt want to drive. I get quite
tense when I drive and not knowing where I am.
StephenMerchant: The other day, I pulled up at some
lights and there was an attractive woman in the car
next to me. I had the top down and I smiled at her. And
I realised that instead of having hip-hop blaring from
the speakers, I was actually listening to the In Our Time
podcast with Melvyn Bragg.
ArmandoIannucci: What was that about?
StephenMerchant: I think it was something like
Roman Britain.
HOLLYWEIRD
ArmandoIannucci: I was going through the scanners
at LA airport, and I had a poster for In the Loop and the
guy on the scanning machine said, Youre involved
in film? And I said, Yes. He asked what the film was
and said, Oh, In the Loop! I went to your screenwriting
event at the filmschool last week. It turned out the guy
who does the scanning machine at LA airport is
a scriptwriter.
StephenMerchant: Once, a waiter brought me room
service, and a script that hed written on the same tray.
ArmandoIannucci: Oh no! I overheard an agent in LA
saying, Hey Gary, sorry to call you out of a funeral. Was
it family or friend?
THE TALENT
ArmandoIannucci: The writers [on Veep] are English.
So [US lead actress] Julia [Louis-] Dreyfuss, instead
of saying, this feels a little too English, does this
stereotype of an English bufoon with wonky teeth. Thats
become shorthand for script rewrites.
StephenMerchant: On network TV, they are obsessed
with likeability. They have test dials where if people dont
like a character they can turn the dial and that person is
replaced by another actor. Which is brutal. Particularly as
it seems to me, if you are given a dial, you will turn it.
AWARDS
ArmandoIannucci: In the Loop got an adapted
screenplay nomination at the Oscars. We were all
laughing at being in a stretch limo, and then we realised
we were doing what everyone in the world who hires a
stretch limo is pretending to do go to the Oscars.
StephenMerchant: On the way to the Golden
Globes, Ricky [Gervais] hadnt
he forced the limousine to pul
filling station where he bough
of US-style cheesy Wotsits. As
approached the Globes, he wa
in orange dust and I was helpi
clean his teeth with ice from th
It was like a lottery winner.
ay to the Golden
eaten and
l into a
t a bag
we
as covered
ng him
he ice tray.
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3 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T HI S WAY I N
COVE R S T ORY
Ohitsthat guyfromthat thing!
James Marsden has done everything from superhero blockbusters (Marvel and
DC) to kids films, teen rom coms, sitcoms and more but isnt looking for the
limelight. So we put him on the cover and asked him why.
p96
M E E T T H E M A N W H O
T O O K T H E P R I M E
M I N I S T E R H O S T A G E . . .
Esquire tracks down the man responsible for
abducting Libyan prime minister Ali Zeidan
and asked him why he did it.
HOW T O. . .
Buildafrepit
You probably dont know it yet, but this
is something you might like to make
before your next barbecue...
p114
A L L T H E S T U F F T H A T S I N S I D E A N D M O R E E T C
CONTENTS
p100
T H E O R A L
H I S T O R Y
O F 2 0 1 3
Inside the Sistine
Chapel as a new pope
is elected, mayors
on crack, hiding in
Kenyas Westgate
Mall during the
terrorist attack
firsthand accounts
of the years most
inspiring and tragic
events.
Shot by JohnRusso. Styling by Kate Hazell.
Bowtie, Dhs590, Yves Saint Laurent at Saks FifthAvenue;
shirt Dhs1,874, andtux jacket (part of suit), Dhs14,360, all Tom
Ford. Carrera calibre 1887 watch, Dhe20,000, TAGHeuer.
ON T HE COVE R
p94
A L A N P A R T R I D G E
The Norfolk-based presenter and conference
host on what life has taught him
p140
M A L C O L M G L A D W E L L
The Tipping Point, Blink and Outliers made
him famous for finding intriguing new ways
of explaining the world. Now with his new
book, David & Goliath, Malcolm Gladwell
explains himself. But not everyone (see p26)
believes Gladwell is the modern-day seer.
p65
3 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
P62
PORTFOLIO
The bitcoin has made its case as
a strong alternative to
money. But nowwe have
an alternative to the bitcoin.
P47
Q&A
Sir Patrick Stewart talks about
being a knight, his newhome in
Brooklyn, and whomhe follows
on Twitter.
P52
MUSIC
As Virgin Records Virgin turns
40 we raise a glas to the label
that gave us The Sex Pistols,
Massive Attack and more.
P58
ART
Esquire goes in the studio with
iconic artist Ralph Steadman
the man who illustrated Hunter S
Thompsons assignments.
P57
FITNESS
You probably havent climbed
anything since you were a
child, but in terms of fitness
its one of the best things you
can be doing.
P60
BOOKS
If youre looking for some
holiday reading (or presents to
order off Amazon right now)
then these are a few of the best
books of the past year.
BUT IF IN DOUBT...
The new(ish) iPad Air... films, music, Internet, Candy Crush, all her favourites
in a sleeker and brighter package to distract her while the football is on.
T HI S WAY I N
F E S T I VE S HOP P I NG
Letsget youthrough
theChristmasmall
trawl abit faster...
We knowthat shopping is no fun, especially at
Christmas. So here are some suggestions to save
wasting time in malls. They include items for the
woman who raised you, the man who calls you son,
the sibling you should probably keep in contact with
a lot more and the woman in your life. Yeah, in and
out, ninja-style and well see you in the bar later.
p82
B A G S O F C L A S S
Not all luggage needs to be a plain black case from
a shop in Dubai Mall, where the staff dont want to
know you after your bag falls apart the first time
you travel. Some cases are rather nice...
p122
G L A S S H O L E D I A R I E S
There are certain things youre encouraged not to
do with Google Glass. One man did those things.
p.85
3 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
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exemption is hereby granted for extracts used for the purpose of fair review.
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Janne Louise Andersen is a Danish journalist
who is covering arts and culture in the Arab
World for American, Arab and Danish print and
online media.
For her Esquire debut article for, Anderson
profiled this months artist profile Khaled Jarrar:
I find inspiration in passionate people like
Khaled Jarrar. He challenges the boundaries
around him, politically, culturally and personally,
and insists on creating a diferent reality.
Published by and Copyright (c) 2013 ITP Lifestyle Publishing
A division of ITP Publishing Group Ltd, registered in the British Virgin Islands Co. No. 1402846
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p108
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3 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
T
WOFEATURES on Google in
consecutive issues. Its getting
to be a habit. Last month it
was TomJunod, outlining the
sheer breadth of what the tech giant has
been up to in the last summer alone. Not
content with being the best classifieds
business model ever invented (apparently
its also a handy search engine) Google
wants to transformthe architecture of
our lives. Its even taking on death via its
genome sequencing programme.
And now, as if it werent enough that its
cars, planes and hot air balloons catalogue
our streets, homes and back yards, it turns
out we will soon be doing that for them,
as A.J. Jacobs discovers on page 122, after
road testing a pair of Google glasses.
I didnt quite get what these were
about, but it turns our Google is smarter
than I am whod have thought it? I now
see that they are merely the next logical
stage of wearable tech, which in itself is
newto most of us. Imfascinated by the
potential of smartwatches (or smartbands
if you want to keep the Rolex). These
gadgets will integrate with all your other
smart products, which will, by the way, be
running your car and everything in your
house. Therell be no more bothersome
taking your phone out of your bag to do
simple stuff. Youll glance at your wrist,
issue a spokencommandandit will be done.
But Google wants more. It wants to
be right there in front of your eyeballs,
predicting what you were about to ask
before you ask it; providing real-time
content we dont yet realise we need, but
upon which it knows we will soon depend.
The thing is not to get too caught up
with what these glasses look like, because
this is just the opening salvo. Were not all
suddenly going to be wearing a computer
strapped to our head although if they
can do a diamond-encrusted pair, theyll
sell loads here. However they evolve, we
will as A.J. Jacobs discovers, become half
robot one way or another. The Android OS
systemdidnt get its name by coincidence,
after all.
And maybe thats fine. Id love to never
lose my keys, run out of groceries, get
lost, forget to turn on the ACor feed the
cat. Who couldnt use a little nudge in the
right direction? But it might be time to
start reflecting on howfar this is going to
take us. Its a long time since I read Brave
NewWorld (at school because I thought it
made me cool. It didnt). Its author, Aldous
Huxley, died fifty years ago last month and
though his work hasnt resonated down
the years quite so much as that of George
Orwell, it might hold more clues to our
future. Huxley didnt fear, as Orwell did, a
society where our freedomwould be taken
away fromus. He thought the greater
danger was that wed give it away of our
own volition; that were too susceptible to
distraction and desire.
Its worth thinking about that before
we entrust anyone to run our lives to such
an extent as we are about to let technology
do for us. There will come a time when we
cannot function without this stuff. Should
we not be thinking a bit harder about
the implications of all of this, rather than
letting the likes of Google do it for us?
JEREMYLAWRENCE
A LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
CHI PS WI TH EVERYTHI NG
WRITE TO US WITH YOUR THOUGHTS OR OBSERVATIONS ON LIFE IN GENERAL: [email protected]
On December 2nd 1988, in
the nations first free elections
for 11 years, Benazir Bhutto
became Pakistans Prime
Minister, and with it the first
ever female leader of an
Islamic state.
Her appointment was also
something of a family victory,
as her predecessor General
Mohammed Zia-ul-Haq came
to power via a military coup
against her father who ruled
from 1973 to 1977. Zulfikar
Bhutto was executed after
being charged with plotting
the assassination of a political
opponent.
Under President Zia, she
was frequently imprisoned
or placed under house arrest
and fled Pakistan for England
under self-imposed exile.
It was during this period
that she took charge of the
Pakistan Peoples Party.
Bhutto led from 1988 to
1990 and again between 1993
and 1996 after which she was
exiled following corruption
charges. After eight years in
exile in Dubai and London,
she again returned to Pakistan
in 2007 to compete in the
2008 elections.
In December 2007, while
at a political rally, Bhutto was
assassinated following gunfire
and a suicide bombing.
T HI S WAY I N
25
YEARS
AGO
THIS
M
ONTH
FIRST FEMALE LEADER OF AN ISLAMIC STATE
Google wants to transform
the architecture of our lives.
Its even taking on death via
genome sequencing
JUST 12 OF THE MANY THINGS YOU NO LONGER
NEED TO CARRY WITH YOU THANKS
TO SMARTPHONES
4 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Elliot and Clinton
Neil Slade
and Naz Degan
Layne Redman
Fouad Georges, Laith Al-Kalai, Dany Khairallah
Nouraldin Al Yousuf, Roxane Ferrer, Eric Sturma
Lena Knoerzer, Ramzi
Gholam, Danielle Boers
ESQUI RE GENTLEMEN S
EVENI NG
OCT 21 ST, 201 3
4 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Steve Cornish, Mike
Smith, Josh Lartey Rami Nasra, Mona Motamedi
Guest mingling
Entertainment by the
Johanna Sandell Duo
Sarah Robbins,
Katy Mountain
Guests mingling The Cave bar
4 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Guests at the Esquire
Gentlemens Evening
John Wayne,
Rebecca Cousins,
James Sewell
Nouraldin Al Yousuf, Gareth Davies
and Eric Sturma Charlene Bello Chona Nocido
Guest mingling
Esquire Editor
Jeremy Lawrence,
makes the welcome
speech, with ITPs
Mona Motamedi
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 4 7
MAN AT
HI S BEST
B
Sunday brunch, StonePark
Cafe, Brooklyn.
S
COTTRAAB: Youre
my second Enterprise
commander, but my first
OBE recipient.
PATRICKSTEWART: Oh?
SR: Should I have said Sir?
PS: That honorific is mostly
discouraged in my profession.
When I was sent a programme to
look at for the Waiting for Godot
production, I had to say, Guys, get
this off. Actors do not use that title.
SR: Is there an OBE discount, like
AARP?
PS: Nothing at all.
SR: What do you recommend?
PS: Imgoing to go with the short-
rib hash and eggs.
SR: Imgoing with that then.
You look fantastic.
PS: I eat almost no red meat.
SR: You still have that newlywed
glow.
PS: Laurence Olivier said if you
have ambition to be a serious
classical actor, you must be as
fit as an athlete. For me, the
breakthrough was going to live
in California in 87. I exercised.
I drank less. It was one of the things
about California that had a positive
impact on me.
SR: Do you prefer Park Slope,
Brooklyn, over Los Angeles?
PS: Absolutely. When I go to LA,
I have a great time. But I can get on
a plane and leave.
SR: Do you still have a home
in England?
PS: I do. I have a place in West
Oxfordshire, close to a little
market town called Chipping
Norton, famous for being the
home of the Chipping Norton
set. David Cameron is the leader
of the Chipping Norton set, and
Imcontinually asked, Are you a
member of this? Well, no, because
theyre all extreme right-wing
PATRICK
STEWART
Scott Raab talks to the
actor about Shakespeare,
selling furniture, Brooklyn,
and this sir business
4 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
land-owning Tories who
ride to hounds and all of
that bulls***.
SR: Have you ever ridden?
PS: Absolutely not! I have
been invited. I have a
neighbour I like very much
who, two or three times a
year, will say to me, You
really ought to come out
shooting with us. Ive got an
extra gun. And the PMwill
probably be there. And, well,
thats all I need to hear.
SR: Do you ever go back to
your family home in Mirfield
[Yorkshire, UK]?
PS: No. I have only one relative
in that town now. Aniece.
But in the neighbouring large
town, Huddersfield, Im
chancellor of the university
and president of the academy
of the professional football
club. I was up to a quarter
past 12 watching a game
against Blackpool last night.
SR: You streamit?
PS: Yeah. I was in Montreal
shooting X-Men, and I
remember thinking, 7:30,
Ive got to be up to listen to
the game. And at 6:15, all the
fire alarms went off in the
hotel. I went to the window
and there were flames leaping
up in a roomopposite my
room. I was out the door,
but I forgot to bring my
computer. So Imout on the
street and the match is about
to start, and I said to one of
the firemen, Look, are you a
soccer fan? Yeah, he said.
My computers in my room,
I said. And he said, Youre
not going back in there.
So I only heard the last 40
minutes or so.
SR: Imstill learning.
PS: I used to say, The great
test for any girlfriend is: Can
she explain the offside rule?
If she can, shes a keeper.
SR: Your newbride can?
PS: Sunny has no idea, but I
kept her anyway.
SR: Were you ever an athlete?
PS: I played soccer and
cricket. I was not very good.
I was a good runner and
hurdler, but at some point
you say, I will never play for
England now. Its absolutely
certain, no matter howhard
I practice, I amnever going to
get the call.
SR: Howold were you when
that dawned on you?
PS: In my 20s.
SR: So you had maintained
some sort of hope that long?
PS: Oh, yeah.
SR: You were that good?
PS: Not at all. You knowthat
old thing of taking your boots
to the game, because, you
know, they might suddenly
need you? I did that when I
was a kid. I used to have my
boots around my neck. Now
its much more like: Jenson
Button [British Formula One
driver] will suddenly get a
bad headache when hes on
the grid at Silverstone, and I
will be called out of the crowd
and I will put on his helmet
and gloves and I will drive
that Formula One monster
around! I race a little and
enjoy it immensely.
SR: You still drive a Jaguar?
PS: In England, I have my
California Jag. I bought it in
89 convertible, of course,
because it was California.
An XJ-S 12-cylinder. Its a
monster. Its in my will.
I bequeathed it to my son.
SR: Very nice.
PS: Its a sport you can play
sitting down. Everything
else just goes away. Has to go
away because you need your
concentration.
SR: In 1974, I was in love with
a girl who took her junior
year in Newcastle, England.
I sawthe Royal Shakespeare
Company performinStratford.
PS: What was it?
SR: Macbeth. I dont
remember much, but I think
I might have seenyouperform.
PS: You knowwho you saw?
Helen Mirren.
SR: You had no role?
PS: Not in that production.
Ive only done Macbeth once,
which is the production
we brought to BAMand to
Broadway.
FAN: Mr. Stewart!
PS[tofan]: Oh, hello there.
FAN: Mr. Stewart, Ima huge
fan. I loved you as Sejanus in
I, Claudius. That is one of my
favourite series. Loved it. Im
a huge fan.
PS: My lord. Thank you
so much.
SR: Does that ever get old?
PS: Thats lovely. Thats
all Ive encountered in the
five years Ive been coming
here and nowliving here.
Never been asked for a
photo in Brooklyn. I get
handshakes, Welcome to
the neighbourhood. This
morning, after I bought my
paper: I live on your block,
the guy says. I havent seen
you before. So glad youre
living here. Is there anything
you need? Anything you
need?
SR: You were once a furniture
salesman. What kind of
furniture did you sell?
PS: Really high-end furniture.
Hudsons, the best furniture
store in Dewsbury [also in
Yorkshire]. They quickly
realised I was an asset,
because I would station
myself near the door. And
I would make an instant
decision as to what kind
of salesman the customer
would like to have. Did they
look homely, middle-class,
aristocratic? Nervous or shy?
And then I would pitch my
sales. It was a kind of acting
exercise. And I loved doing it.
SR: Were you ever close to
returning to Hudsons?
PS: Two years later, because
then I left drama school and
I was about the only graduate
frommy year who hadnt got a
job or an agent or a manager.
SR: Were you the worst actor
in your class?
PS: I think not, because
I got good roles in all the
school productions. I was
very miscast in our final
presentations, when agents
and managers come to see the
talent. No one wanted to see
me. And one of the teachers
found me and said, Why
arent you having fun drinking,
dancing? And I said, I feel
Ive failed. And then he said
that awful expression: Can I
be frank with you?
SR: Awful.
PS: You should always say no
when people say that. Always
say no. And I said, Yeah. And
he said, Youre not a leading
man. Youre a character actor.
And the next 20 years are
going to be really tough before
you come into your own. I
was 19. That was more years
than Id actually lived.
SR: Your career path is kind
of miraculous.
PS: Its crazy. There is no
explaining it. Because all I
ever wanted to do was theatre.
I had no interest in filmor
television.
SR: I wonder if endurance is a
talent in and of itself.
AS CAPTAIN PICARD ON STAR
TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
AS PROFESSOR CHARLES XAVIER
IN X-MEN: THE LAST STAND
ALL I WANTED
TO DO WAS
SHAKESPEARE.
THESE OTHER
THINGS WERE
JUST FLUKES.
I DIDNT LOOK FOR
THEM. NEVER HAVE
LOOKED FOR THEM.
EVEN X-MEN.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 4 9
PS: But I had such minimal
ambition.
SR: Lowexpectations are a
good thing.
PS: They werent low
expectations. They were high
expectations, but in a very
narrowfield. All I wanted to do
was Shakespeare. These other
things that happened were just
flukes. I didnt look for them.
Never have looked for them.
Even X-Men. On the one hand,
it all feels perfectly natural that
Imtalking to you, about to
open two plays on Broadway in
company with Ian McKellen.
And at the same time, what
happened? Wake up, wake up,
youre still selling furniture.
Youve got to get to work. The
bus will leave in ten minutes.
Crazy. Wacky.
SR: Maybe you learned a
certain resiliency because of
the misery brought about by
your fathers drinking. You
hung in there, and you get
credit for the series of events
that have preceded your sitting
down for brunch here today.
PS: Youve just reminded me
of a speech right at the end of
Waiting for Godot, where Didi
says, We have kept our
appointment. And I can feel
it emotionally now. Howmany
other people can say as much?
We kept our appointment.
That came frommy father.
Friday nights to Sunday
nights, he was drunk. Monday
morning, he was there. He
never let the family down in
that respect, and a lot of drunks
do. He worked and worked,
and then fromFriday night he
made our lives miserable. But
Monday through Friday, he did
his job. And he hung in. And
then on Friday, he escaped.
SR: Did he ever see you
perform?
PS: They both did. They saw
me go as far as good roles with
the Royal Shakespeare.
SR: Did he express pride?
PS: My father was only
interested when we were
successful. If we were playing
cricket well, he would come
and watch. If we werent,
he wouldnt. When I got a
monthly rep at the RSC, then
he was interested. I wish like
hell my parents could have
shared in some of the Star Trek
stuff. My father believed that
military service was a good
thing. It had made hima star.
And so he would have got a
big kick out of being with me
here and hearing people cry
out, Hey, Captain, howyou
doing?I have talked too
much. You havent asked
many questions.
SR: I have a question. Why
do you followTracy Morgan
on Twitter?
PS: Why?
SR: Hes very hyperkinetic and
strange.
PS: Hes remarkable.
SR: Do you knoweach other?
PS: I dont knowhim. I know
very fewcomedians. My
current hero is Louis CK.
Comedy is what Id like to do
next. Acouple of years ago,
I was asked, Howwould you
like to be remembered? And
my answer was That I was
very funny. If I could take a
step into the world of comedy
in some form
SR: The video you posted
on Twitter, in which youre
teaching your newbride the
quadruple take, was genuine
comedy. Imwatching it and
thinking, Hes high.
PS: I think that has raised my
profile with my grandchildren
more than anything else. And
I was not high. We had been
drinking a bottle of Domaine
Tempier ros fromProvence,
France. It was late afternoon
on Sunnys parents porch at
their cabin in the Sierras.
SR: You seemso happy in
the video and here right now.
But not content.
PS: Ian told me not long ago
that right before a good friend
of his died, the guy said, You
knowwhat really p***es me
off? Imgoing to miss so much.
I want to knowwhat happens!
Unfortunately, thats not the
way life works.
[RaabandStewart finish
brunch, walk outside.]
PS: Do you knowwhere
we are?
SR: Specifically? No.
PS: You see theres an old
stone building there?
SR: Yes.
PS: August 27, 1776. The
Revolutionary Army will be
pushed down at the Battle of
Brooklyn, down this slope here.
Right here. They somehow
got around this stone house,
because the English were in
control of that building. And
the Revolutionary Army was
retreating to the East River,
down through Gowanus,
and they were being shelled
fromthis point here. They
counterattacked six times.
They came back up this slope
and retook this house six times
in one day. About 400 soldiers
mostly fromMaryland
held a defensive line here
while the remnants of the army
crossed the East River into
Manhattan. And it was one of
the great turning points of the
war, because if they had been
eradicated here, which they
nearly were, that would have
been it.
SR: Howdid you learn this?
PS: Sunnys lived here in
Brooklyn for ten years and
she loves history, so she knew
about all of this. Furthermore,
that building over there is the
very first clubhouse of the
Brooklyn Dodgers.
SR: Really?
PS: Before they went to Ebbets
Field. They played on the other
side of the house. Theres a big
open space there, and that was
the Dodgers first ground. Isnt
it great?
SR: Thats so cool.
PS: I love it. To think of those
guys around here at that time.
So exciting.
DATEOFBIRTH: July 13, 1940
WHICHMAKESHIM: 73
KNIGHTED: June 2, 2010
WHICHAFFORDSHIM: Sir status
HOMETOWN: Mirfield, West Yorkshire, England
CURRENTRESIDENCE: Brooklyn
HONEDHISCHOPS: As a member of the Royal Shakespeare
Company in Stratford-upon-Avon for 16 years
BUTYOUPROBABLYKNOWHIMBETTERAS: Captain Jean-Luc
Picardof the USSEnterprise on Star Trek: The Next Generation,
andProfessor Charles Xavier of the X-Men movies
GIVINGHIM: The benefit of the USs cultural impulse to
imbue its wise leaders of science fiction with classically
British qualities
HASEMBRACEDTHEINTERNETANDSOCIALMEDIA?Yes
THERESULT: A streamof tweets and videos on Twitter, with
cameos by co-star and friend Ian McKellen
EVIDENCE: Search YouTube for Patrick Stewart quadruple
take and Patrick Stewart first slice of pizza.
PERENNIALLYREVEREDSTAGEPERFORMANCE: His one-man
adaptationof Dickens AChristmas Carol, inwhichhe performs
about 35 roles
HISTHOUGHTSONBRINGINGITTOBROADWAY: I thought the
first thingI woulddo on a Broadway stage was throwup.
THE ESQUI RE DOSSI ER
PATRICKSTEWART
WITH RICKY GERVAIS
IN EXTRAS
WITH IAN MCKELLEN
ON TWITTER
5 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
A JOKE FROM A BEAUTI FUL WOMAN:
JAI MI E ALEXANDER
A corgi goes to a job-placement agency to
look for work. The man behind the desk says,
A talking dog! Ill fix you up with a job in no
time. After a few minutes on the phone, he
declares, Here you go. You start at the circus
on Monday.
The corgi replies, Thats no good for me.
Im a plumber.
ABOUTTHEJOKESTER: Jaimie Alexander, the 29-year-
old Texan who plays Sif, Thors loyal sidekick, in this
months sequel, Thor: The Dark World, enjoys tackling
most stunts, but she found one stunt a little unnerving:
the use of her likeness to market the movie. For Thor,
there was a Slurpee cup that had my body attached to
a straw. Its kind of inappropriate. You can drink out of
me. So she didnt collect it, like we did? I have one.
But its in a cupboard, behind the pans. For now, ours is
staying on the mantel.
MATT GOULET
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5 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
MUSIC: 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN
I
t seems weird nowthat their name is
on trains, cable TV, planes and even
a bank but there was a time when
the Virgin logo was something youd
scribble on your schoolbook to give
two fingers to The Man. It was everything
countercultural a big label with the soul
and swagger of an indie.
Virgin Records turns 40 at the end of
this year. There will be a series of birthday
gigs fromsignings past and current, plus
compilation CDs, a retrospective exhibition
and an impressive coffee-table book (full
disclosure: I wrote the chapters on dance
music). Its fair to say that Virgins identity is
a little fuzzier than it was, after The Rolling
Stones, The Spice Girls, Mariah Carey and
near-extinction during financier Guy Hands
slapstick attempts to re-engineer its parent
company EMI. But Virgin still did things for
British music that no other label could.
Virgin invented the hippy capitalist.
Branson, a Stowe-educated son of a barrister,
opened a beanbag-strewn record shop in
1971. To Branson, the counterculture was a
market like any other, so he and his colleagues
launched a record label to release the music
they wanted to buy. Their first album, Mike
Oldfields Tubular Bells, set the blueprint for
prog rock and ambient electronica, selling
2.6 million copies in the UKalone.
When punk broke, Virgin was the only
major label that stood by the Sex Pistols. They
released the Jubilee single God Save the
Queen, funded stunts like the bands Thames
boat trip, and defended Never Mind the B*****s
(against obscenity charges for using b*****s
the band won).
Virgin became the go-to label for the
On the occasion of Virgin Records 40th birthday
BY ANDREW HARRI SON
1 2 OF
VI RGI N S
BEST
SI NGLES
FROM THE
LAST 40
YEARS
01
MIKE OLDFIELD
Tubular Bells
Part One
(1973)
02
SEX PISTOLS
GodSave the
Queen (1977)
03
XTC
MakingPlans
for Nigel
(1979)
04
SPARKS
Beat the
Clock (1979)
05
THE HUMAN
LEAGUE
Love Action
(1981)
06
INNER CITY
GoodLife
(1988)
07
NENEH CHERRY
Bufalo
Stance (1988)
08
MASSIVE ATTACK
Unfinished
Sympathy
(1991)
09
THE VERVE
Bitter Sweet
Symphony
(1997)
10
DAFT PUNK
One More
Time (2000)
11
KELIS
Milkshake
(2003)
12
PROFESSOR
GREEN
I NeedYou
Tonight (2010)
post-punk generation (bands such as
Magazine, OMDand XTCall signed), and
all the flamboyant art-pop that followed.
The Human League, Heaven 17 and early
Simple Minds werent just on Virgin. They
were Virgin bands: strange and unsettling,
visually amazing, as likely to offend the NME
as the Daily Mail and wildly ambitious. It all
culminated in Culture Club, where a sharp-
tongued gay man became the biggest pop star
on the planet.
In the years to come, Virgin took other
chances. Fewother labels sawany potential
in the loose groupings of rappers, producers,
graffiti artists and breakdancers that grewup
in the late Eighties. FromSoul II Soul, British
RnBs biggest export in two decades, to
Massive Attack, where everything fromhip-
hop to Jamaican sound systems and newwave
came together.
In 1988, Virgin released the first
compilation of Detroit techno. In the 90s,
as pop turned to dance and DJs became
superstars, they started to sign people whod
grown up listening to Virgin releases: Air, The
Verve, The Chemical Brothers. Above all there
was Daft Punk, who plugged the labels new
dance direction into its head-music heritage.
They were all different yet somehowall
Virgin artists.
Its impossible to admire all that Virgin
did. For every Neneh Cherry theres a Geri
Halliwell music is, after all, a business.
But could any current label hope to repeat
a Mike Oldfield, a Culture Club or even a
Spice Girls? Probably not. If the Virgin story
proves anything, its that Malcolm McLaren
was right about one thing: cash does come
from chaos.
NEW BR03 GOLDEN HERITAGE COLLECTION 42 MM
Bell &Ross Boutique Burjuman Center, Dubai, U.A.E. +971 4 3594115 Watch Gallery The Dubai Mall, Dubai, U.A.E. +971 4 4341544 www.bellross.com
5 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
TECH: THIS CAMERA
THINKS ITS A
CAMCORDER
Thats because the EOS 70D is the
smartest piece of kit in the room
BY JOHNNY DAVIS
THE VERDICT
+
+
+
THE SPECS
The 70D has a 20.2 million pixel
CMOS sensor coupled with
a DIGIC5 processor. It can shoot
7fps at full resolution for up to
65 JPEGS or 16 RAWfiles great
for shooting sport
THE
TOUCHSCREEN
Canon was the first
company to give a
DSLR a touchscreen.
The 70Ds responsive,
articulated version
is easy to viewfrom
a variety of angles,
whether shooting
landscape
or portrait
C
anons newmid-range DSLRhas been called
the start of the next photograph revolution.
Its newsensor, the Dual Pixel CMOS, is the
thing thats got people excited. It powers a
smooth autofocus that stays consistent and in
place as the subject moves around, and it can also track faces.
In video mode that means it behaves like a high-end
camcorder, allowing you to create pull-focus effects the
movie directors trick of shifting focal point fromone part of
the scene to another or keeping the subject in focus while
blurring the background.
The 70Dreplaces one of Canons most popular DSLRs: the
60D. That was released in 2010 light years ago in camera-kit
terms so there have been a fewother upgrades, too.
The newunit packs seven frames per second continuous
shooting, a 20.2 megapixel resolution and has Wi-Fi built in,
which not only lets you upload images wirelessly, but also
means you can control the camera remotely via a smartphone
ood for wildlife shots, if thats your bag. Either way: youre
king at autumns best newcamera. Fromaround Dhs6,340
ESQUIRE
APPROVES
Canon EOS 70D,
canon.com
Great image quality,
long-lasting battery
life and weather-
sealed construction.
This is the mid-range
DSLR to beat
go
look look
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The name Bentley and the B in wings device are registered trademarks. September 2013 Bentley Motors Limited. Model shown: New Flying Spur.
The most powerful drive: instinct.
The New Flying Spur.
Emirates Dubai Tel: 00971 4294 4492 Emirates Abu Dhabi Tel: 00971 2222 2445 Doha Tel: 00974 4411 4411
Bahrain Tel: 00973 1723 8822 Kuwait Tel: 00965 2473 5199 Beirut Tel: 00961 161 3670 Jeddah Tel: 00966 12606 7323
Riyadh Tel: 00966 1121 73838 Al Khobar Tel: 00966 13814 4443 Oman Tel: 00968 2457 3798 New Delhi Tel: 0091 11241 21616
For further enquiries please call 00973 1619 8827
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 5 7
MAN AT
HIS BEST
F
ifty years ago this winter, a PE lecturer at Leeds
University in the UK, called Don Robinson, noting
howout of shape his climbers got during the cold
months, invented the indoor climbing wall. The first
commercial version soon followed, in Sheffield,
and fromthere it spread around the world, including Dubai.
The most longstanding wall (which is actually outdoors)
is behind the World Trade Centre apartments in Dubai
(dorellsports.com). Theres a newer wall at the Paris-Sorbonne
University in Abu Dhabi and a fewsmaller ones elsewhere in
the UAE. If you want to scale some proper crags (and there are
plenty here to choose fromhere and in Oman), check out the
links below. But first, youll need the kit.
1. Stick emin your
shoes between
climbs to stop them
stinking
2. To belay a mate
(so they dont fall),
thread the rope
through this
3. These boots arent
made for walking
should be tight but
not too tight
4. Use chalk to stop
your hands getting
clammy
5. To keep your
belay device on your
harness, youll need a
karabiner
6. Tie on your rope
when climbing; clip
on your karabiner
when belaying
7. Karabiners are also
great for carrying
gear up with you
FITNESS: FIRST AGAINST THE WALL
For those about to rock climb, we salute you
BY JIM MERRETT
1.
Boot Bananas,Dhs72
bootbananas.com
6.
R300 harness,
Dhs600, by
Arcteryx
arcteryx.com
3.
Corona VCR
climbing shoes,
Dhs450,
by Red Chili
redchili.de/en
4.
Chalk bag, Dhs90,
by Black Diamond
blackdiamondequipment.com
2.
Pro Guide belay
device, Dhs144,
by Wild Country
wildcountry.co.uk
5.
Helix karabiner,
Dhs84, by Wild
Country wildcountry.
co.uk
7.
Magnetron karabiner,
24, by Black Diamond
blackdiamondequipment.
com
THE KIT
OUTDOOR CLIMBING IN THE UAE: Abu Dhabi Alpine Club, adalpine.wordpress.com; Dorell Sports, dorellsports.com/
climbing/dubai.html; Global Climbing, globalclimbing.com; UAE Climbing, uaeclimbing.dustin.li
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5 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
ART: GOOD GONZO
R
alph Steadman
digs out a
mound of
sheet music
from between
a stack of books in his Kent
studio. Aha! he exclaims.
Here it is! What it
is, is Steadmans Blot
Symphony: yellowing
lined pages of sheet music
splattered with the British
artists iconic, signature
style, as if Just William
stole into the music
room and went mad with
Winsor & Newton inks. Its
quintessential Steadman,
now 77: mad, maverick,
and riotously fun. But
wait, theres method to
this madness. Steadman
straightens, holds a page out
and begins convincingly
to hum the unreadable notes.
It always sounds
like somebodys stomach
rumbling, Steadman
observes, a whiff of the
Mersey river lingering on the
tongue even though he left
Cheshire, in the north of the
UK, as a baby. Steadmans
been at this kind of thing
for over 50 years. Not the
singing but the furious
scribbling. He started out
freelancing for Private
Eye, Punch and The Daily
Telegraph, but he famously
found his groove and lifelong
sparring partner when the
political magazine Scanlans
Monthly sent him to do
a piece on the Kentucky
Derby with renegade writer
Hunter S Thompson in
1970. That adventure the
first of many has been
well documented but
bears repeating. Steadman
remembers getting the call:
How would I like to
go to Kentucky to meet an
ex-Hells Angel whos just
shaved his head? At the time
it sounded a bit weird. I said
thats all right, Im looking
for work.
It took three days for
Steadman to find Thompson.
When he did, Thompson
exclaimed: Holy s***!
They said I was looking for
a matted-haired geek with
string warts and I guess
Ive found him. That tone
unforgiving, manic and
spot on set the template
for the assignment and
their friendship. The piece
The Kentucky Derby Is
Decadent and Depraved
saw writer and illustrator
immerse themselves in
the debauchery they were
sent to cover. They became
part of the story; a way of
operating that came to be
known as gonzo journalism.
Thompson figures heavily
in Proud Too Be Weirrd, a
new book of Steadmans
work. But Steadmans
righteous anger ranges far
further than adventures
with his famous companion.
In his newspaper cartoons,
politicians are s***-talkers
and a***-lickers; a series
on Berlin sees prostitutes
come equipped with coin-
slot; everywhere humanity
is stripped of any dignity.
Its a long way from the
mild-mannered, gentle
eccentric before us, who you
could happily expect to see
on childrens TV reading
aloud Alices Adventures in
Wonderland, one of the many
books he has illustrated.
Even Steadmans way
of creating his art makes it
look a leisurely pursuit. His
method is at odds with the
madness it unleashes. His
world view is depressing,
even if he is not. I tend
to think of the world as
getting blacker. I think
the computer has a lot to
do with it. Its f***ed up
our brains. We dont think
rationally anymore. When
I was growing up, I wanted
to change the world. I found
that I have; its worse than
when I started. Ill take the
credit for the lousiness.
Steadman can be a
serious man, although he is
not always taken seriously
as an artist even by
himself. He shows us the
urinal he was given from
Londons Hackney Empire
theatre, when it was being
renovated. He signed it
RMutt, a homage to
Duchamps Fountain, one
of his heroes. He was a very
human person but he was an
artist, Steadman says. He
was the one who connected
really common things with
art. He pauses, chuckles.
You think of the number of
stand-up comics who must
have p****d in that.
Ralph Steadman: Proud Too Be
Weirrd, edited by Steve Crist,
is out now
Ralph Steadman and embracing the weirdness
BY CHRI S FLOYD
6 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
THE GOLDFINCH
BY DONNA TARTT
This long-anticipated novel is explosive in
more ways than one. Near the opening of
Donna Tartts The Goldfinch (Little, Brown,
Dhs110), our narrator Theo Decker, 13 years
old at the time is wandering through New
Yorks Metropolitan Museumof Art when a
bomb detonates, killing his mother and tearing
apart the museumand his life. At the time,
he is studying the title painting a goldfinch
burnished with light and chained to a perch
a flickering sun-struck instant that existed
nowand forever, as does the terrorist attack,
imprinting itself on the canvas of his mind,
inked in blood and dusted with plaster. In his
concussed daze, he comforts a dying antiques
dealer and absently makes away with the
painting, two acts that will change the course of
his life. Over the next fewyears, Theo navigates
a gauntlet of caretakers some cold, some
cruel, some too trusting and benevolent and
he loves and betrays themall, a contemporary
Oliver Twist. The novel is Dickensian, too, in its
scope, tracking Theo into a troubled adulthood
in which he must endure his self-propelled
recklessness: the drug addiction, thievery,
and romantic entanglements set in motion
years before. He is as flawed and variable and
capricious and beautiful as the antiques he
deals. The prose is so luminous, the characters
so richly imagined, that I felt transported,
losing days of my life to the years of Theos.
Tartt publishes a novel every decade, and damn
if she doesnt put her whole heart into it. This is
what a major literary event looks like.
BENJAMIN PERCY
BOOKS: FOUR FROM
2013 YOU SHOULD
KNOW ABOUT
SLOW GETTING
UP
BY NATE JACKSON
Nate Jacksons SlowGetting Up
(Harper, Dhs100) is my very
favourite book of the past year,
with the possible exception
of a collection of Alice
Munros short fiction, which
I discount primarily because
her otherworldly work was
published during decades
past but also because Munro,
unlike Jackson, did not play
tight end and wide receiver
for six seasons in the National
Football League. Jackson did,
and the mere fact that he was
but a backup hardly makes
it less outrageous that a man
blessed enough to make a
living playing pro football
should also write so well.
Its all here the
lifelong love of a brutal
game, the inevitable
injuries, the drugs,
more injuries,
more drugs, the women, still
more injuries and its all told
by the kind of jock you never
knewin high school: defiant,
honest, smart, painfully
self-aware. Jacksons also
funny as hell, page-after-page
funny so funny that when
things get grim, as when he
tries self-injecting HGHin his
desperation to prolong life in
the league, it lands full force.
Jackson began his pro
football life at the bottom, as
an undrafted free agent. Slow
Getting Up is his first book.
Maybe next, he can find a cure
for cancer. SCOTT RAAB
An incomplete but sufficient round-up of
this years key reads
NOTABLE SENTENCES [1 OF 2]
Theywerelikeageingdancers performingthe
first ballet of their youth, just toseeif theystill
knewhow. It was strangethethings youstill
remembered, whether youwantedtoor not.
Afterward, theyslept. For thefirst timesince
arrivinginBuenos Aires, Andrewdidnot dream.
Cartwheel, by Jennifer duBois, a stunningnovel about an
American student abroadaccusedof murder
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 6 1
THE INTERVIEW
MICHAEL CONNELLY ON WRITING FOR MEN BY TOM CHIARELLA
ESQUIRE: Doyouhave
anyparticular sense
that youwritefor men?
MICHAELCONNELLY:
The direct answer is
that I dont think I do.
I dont knowthat men
want anything diferent,
particularly. But, truth is,
Imme. I write what Id
want to read.
ESQ: Youhaveastrong
commandof theway
menspeak, anyway.
MC: As a reporter,
you develop an ear for
dialogue because its
your job to capture it
accurately. When I was
at a newspaper, I knew
what an opportunity
that was, and I
religiously protected
my time on the cop
beat. You start to hear
the words they use that
have impact, import.
ESQ: Youever talkto
detectives now?
MC: I had eggs with
two detectives this
morning.
ESQ: Whatdtheysay?
MC: Lots. Nothing I can
tell. The key is to let
themtell the story.
ESQ: Didyouever think
about becomingacop?
MC: My problemwas
I was enamoured
of detectives as a
teenager. I liked what
they did piecing
things together,
thinking about
situations. But to get
there? Eight to 10 years
in a patrol car? I didnt
have that in me. I didnt
want to tell people what
to do.
ESQ: Whydosomany
crimenovels take
placeinFloridaand
California?
MC: Large transient
populations. People
often arent fromthere.
They arrive there,
looking for missing
pieces. This leads them
places no one, least of
all them, ever expects
to end up.
ESQ: Wouldyourather
havelunchwithMickey
Haller or JackReacher?
MC: I dont know.
Better conversation
with Haller, maybe, but
Reacher would probably
pick up the bill.
Connellys latest is
The Gods of Guilt (Little,
Brown, Dhs103), his 26th
novel and the fifth in the
Lincoln Lawyer series.
THE CUCKOOS
CALLING
BY ROBERT GALBRAITH
The problemwith
mystery books is the truth. Hide the crime,
manufacture an alibi, blur the past, flat-out lie
sure. Do it well, do it poorly; it doesnt really
matter. Within a couple of hundred pages, the
truth will out. And in either case, there are no
secrets. Thats why its surprising that anyone
expected to keep the primary secret of The
Cuckoos Calling (Mulholland Books, Dhs96)
particularly J. K. Rowling, she, the Earth
mother of everything Harry Potter which
turns out to be that Rowling wrote the book
under a pen name, as a man. Problembeing: it
has nothing to do with the quality of the story.
Not that its the worse for the knowledge
of Rowlings authorship. The Cuckoos Calling
is a component mystery concerning the
suicide-cum-murder of a model that features
witty, clearheaded descriptions of celebrity
life in a world peopled by a greedy chorus of
the usual suspects: liars, scumbags, and movie
producers. The story is untangled by a limping
one-legged detective named Cormoran Strike.
VANISHED
BY WIL S. HYLTON
On September 1, 1944, Japanese
anti-aircraft guns brought
down a US B-24 bomber flying
a mission over the Pacific
archipelago of Palau. Vanished
(Riverhead, Dhs103) tells the
tale of this lost bomber and
the six-decade-long quest to
find it, hopping back and forth
across the years and weaving
together the storylines of the
men who went missing and the
men and women whove been
searching ever since. Palau is a
scattering of hundreds of small
islands that are all inextricably
linked, rising froma single
immense underwater mesa, and
as Wil Hylton sees it, the same
could be said of the people hes
writing about: Like the islands
themselves, their separateness
was an illusion. Beneath the
surface, they were all fused
together; together they formed
an archipelago of grief. Its an
ambitious metaphor, and one
that demands an exceptional
Hes broke, wounded by the past, and has a
doughty girl Friday in his employ. The gumshoes
holy trinity! Despite the fact that at one point
he fondly recalls a childhood summer of lawns
and tree houses and eating iced lemon squash,
Strike is pretty rough hewn and likable. So
whats wrong with any of this? Its a page turner,
full of lessons Rowling learned on her way to
becoming a rich novelist in a city built on the
back of the greatest novels ever. But this is not a
well-edited novel by a first-timer; its a tumbling,
rumbling exercise, even for Rowling, who took
seven rambling volumes to tell the childrens
story of our age. The Cuckoos Calling is talky and
overlong for a story thats not too complicated.
Rowling would have been better off just putting
her name on it and taking the heat, enjoying the
sales, and doing the work that comes with being
the woman she is. Thats the truth, and the truth
will out. TOM CHIARELLA
writer to pull off. Hylton
succeeds. He reported the hell
out of this, and his diligence
pays off, revealing a thousand
surprising connections that
would otherwise have stayed
forever out of sight. For
example, in one tiny revelation
that speaks volumes about the
depths of Hyltons research,
we learn that a World War II
aviator central to the tale came
fromthe town of Amesbury,
Massachusetts, just above
the harbour of Newburyport,
where shipwrights had built the
Antelope [a British-commanded
schooner that made a historic
visit to Palau in the 1700s].
Hylton never makes too big a
deal of these hard-won details,
never trumpets or overhypes
them. Instead he just lays them
out, letting themgather their
own weight until the hidden ties
that bind his characters seemas
clear and moving and inevitable
as the story about war and loss
and recovery that hes telling.
LUKE DITTRICH
NOTABLE SENTENCES [2 OF 2]
Withher nervousblessing, hegoes
hunting. Itsarcheryseason, sheisthinking,
andinall of thesuicidesshesever heardof,
noneinvolvedabowandarrow.
Thank Youfor Your Service, by DavidFinkel, a
series of portraits of soldiers adjustingtolifeafter
war
6 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
D
ont roll your
eyes. I know
another article
about Bitcoin.
But I promise
this ones different. Imnot a
fanboy who theorises about
the identity of secret creator
Satoshi Nakamoto. And
Imnot a throwback who
believes that since money
creation has largely been left
to government fiat over the
past hundred years, this must
always be so.
Ima believer. But not so
much because I understand
or care to understand the
complexity underlying the
creation of maths-based
currency. Its more because
I have seen all kinds of things
turn into money and have
also seen things that are
already money deployed so
irresponsibly that it enabled
newmoney to take hold.
Lets backtrack a bit. Bitcoin is a cryptocurrency in which
newcoins are minted digitally and transferred based on an
open-source Internet protocol that doesnt go through a central
intermediary. The coins are processed by servers that mine
newbitcoins via a mathematical formula that limits the total
number that can ever be created to 21 million. Over an already
volatile 2013, the value of a single bitcoin has ranged from$13 to
more than $250, and its attracted the attention of everyone from
the Winklevoss twins to a newfund (the Bitcoin Investment
Trust) composed only of bitcoins.
As revolutionary as I believe bitcoin to be, the mining process
creates critical weaknesses its difficult to understand and can
be panic-inducing for the several minutes people are waiting
to get their funds. And if your funds disappear fromthe non-
centralised ledger, theres no recourse; theyre just gone, as has
happened recently. But nowtheres an alternative an open-
source maths-based currency called ripple that solves some of
the problems.
The genius of both bitcoin and ripple is there is no centralised
depository. Without a central ledger, all transactions must
be broadcast to all other servers that run the protocol so that
these maths-based currencies avoid being debased. Both are
anonymous and skillfully encrypted.
But bitcoins have to be mined through a series of cumbersome
Cloud-based computations that take ten minutes or so; ripples
are instantaneous. And you get a key to recover any apparently
compromised accounts.
Naturally, there are haters who cannot abide the idea of a
company, Ripple Labs, creating a more user-friendly protocol
on top of the libertarian utopia of Bitcoin. Then there are those
who criticise Ripples business plan. The idea is to create 100
billion ripples and get more than half of theminto the hands
of the public by giving them
away. As more people start
using ripples to buy things,
they will presumably growin
value, leaving the company
and its founders sitting on
about 50 billion ripples. If
thats devious, then so is every
company thats ever gone
public while retaining the
great bulk of its shares.
Its also analogous to
what governments do. Every
government manipulates
its currency. Whats more,
theyre not transparent
about it. At least these guys
have made it clear that there
can never be another ripple
created. When the US needed
more cash to bail out AIG
and other reckless financial
actors, it simply printed
more money.
Ripple also solves some
other elemental problems
in the existing system of
government-issued money. Banks are thieves. Every three
months, I get a distribution of about $1,400 from an investment
I have in some apartments. Its wired directly to my bank
account, yet my bank charges me $15 for the privilege. Then
theres the time question. I am a user of Dwolla, an online
payment system that you can use like cash in thousands of
stores. Funding my Dwolla account took six days from the
moment it was taken out of my bank account. Its absurd.
Someone had use of that float for almost a week.
The entire corrupt systemis ripe for disruption.
Chris Larsen, the CEOof Ripple Labs Inc., is someone
Ive written about often. His first company, E-Loan, sought to
democratise mortgage lending, and his second company, Prosper,
sought to do the same for peer-to-peer lending. The problemwith
both of those ideas is that they were seeking to dismantle gigantic
industries with huge political momentum.
This time, ripple could have its own giant on its side.
MasterCard and Visa charge as much as four percent for their
transactions. The banks that issue the cards in the end get to
keep some of that. But all they really get for taking the risk that
you dont pay your bill is the chance to collect massive interest
if youre late. These banks would love to keep collecting that
interest without having to pay MasterCard and Visa. Ripple
makes that possible, if it gets accepted ubiquitously. In my
opinion, the big financial-service brands ought to feel about
ripple the way the record labels felt about Napster.
And then its game on. With the August announcement
that Germany will start taxing bitcoin assets, and a ruling by a
federal judge in Texas that bitcoin is a legit currency, its clear
that imaginary money is becoming more real by the day.
Meanwhile, Imstocking up on ripple while its still less than a
penny apiece.
Digital currencies can break the tyranny of banks.
But Bitcoin is scary and complicated. Now theres
a simpler alternative.
BY KEN KURSON
PORTFOLIO:
THE NEW MONEY
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6 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MAN AT
HIS BEST
FOOD:
NUEVO ESPANOL
Two more Spanish restaurants have now opened
in Dubai. Perfect for evening tapas before the
late-night La Liga game on TV
EL SUR
This recent Spanish opening is at The Westin Mina Seyahi on
the site when the Senya bar used to be. The restaurant is a romp
through the classics with patatas bravas and Iberico hamwith
brushed tomato bread (were going back just on the strength of
howgood this was), and other traditional dishes all present, as
well as more contemporary items such sea breamwith coriander
and eggplant with soy honey and ricotta, or red snapper with
pumpkin gnocchi. And it wouldnt be Dubai without Wagyu
here they serve a grade-six Wagyu ribeye with padrn green
peppers. One of the best newrestaurants of 2013
The Westin Mina Seyahi Beach Resort, +971 4 399 7700, westinminaseyahi.com
SALERO
Anyone who has spent entire afternoons in Spanish food
markets (especially La Bouqueria Market just off Las Rambla
in Barcelona) can rejoice at the opening of Salero at the
Kempinski, Mall of the Emirates. Theres a decent range
of authentic tapas (two for Dhs70, four for Dhs130 or six
for Dhs195) along with a big paella section and the near-
essential for Spanish food pork licence means that theres an
option to have fine cold cuts (hams, lomo, chorizo, cecina, etc.)
served on traditional wooden boards. Halal deli options are
also available.
Kempinski Hotel Mall of the Emirates, +971 4 341 0000, kempinski.com/dubai
YUAN FOR THE MONEY
Visiting Atlantis Hotel on the Palmmay well
feel like wandering into a Russian Oligarchs
birthday party, but the catering is rarely less
than excellent. Theres nowanother place to
eat at the hotel with the opening of Chinese
restaurant Yuan.
Executive Chef Jeff Tan, formerly of
Hakkasan Mayfair, says he concept behind
Yuan is to provide a traditional Chinese
experience, but also include surprising
touches that youve never seen in this region.
Dishes include sweet and sour chicken
with honey, pineapple, pear, zucchini and bell
peppers (1); Wok-Seared Wagyu ribeye steak
with jin lan Sauce (2) and Textures of corn
custard, crumble, crisp, coconut sorbet, sweet
milk snow(3).
Dont expect it to be cheap, but expect it to
be excellent.
YUAN, Atlantis The PalmDubai, +971 4 426 2626
WEEKEND REFORM
British gastro pub, Reform Social &
Grill, has launched a Reform Brunch
Experience. Yes, we know Dubai
needs another brunch like it needs
more cars on the road, but this one
is actually well worth taking note of.
Based on old English gentlemans
clubs ofers among its menu, a
full English fry up, fish and chips,
whole sea bream, Australian flank
steak and Scarborough Fair whole
spring chicken. Its pork-and-alcohol
licensed, so the fry up is proper
and the bar has an extensive cocktail
menu for afterwards. Brunch is from
12.30-4pm and costs Dhs350 with
alcohol (unlimited wine, beer &
Prosecco)or Dhs230 with soft drinks.
ReformSocial &Grill, The Lakes, Dubai +971
4 454 2638 / reformsocialgrill.ae
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DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 6 5
HOW TO BUILD A FIRE PIT
BY RYAN DAGOSTI NO
YOUCOULDJUSTBUILDa fire somewhere, then put it out when youre done. Or you
could buy one of those metal basins at a place like Ace Hardware. But by actually digging
into the dirt and constructing a pit whose sole purpose is to contain a campfire by
permanently incorporating it into the tiny speck on the Earth that belongs to you you
are making a commitment. A commitment to your family, a commitment to your friends,
and a commitment to having fun.
String About 110
bricks (If you
live next door
to somewhere
thats being
demolished to
make way for
the next world
record-breaking
project, you
might find
some strays.
Otherwise, buy
firebricks at
your local home
centre.)
YOU WILL NEED TOOLS
Acouple of bags
of masonry
sand
About 20 rocks,
each roughly the
size of a melon
(Available at
garden centres.)
Aspade
Ashovel
T HE I NST RUCT I ONS
SERAFINA
The Serafina restaurant chain has opened in Dubai. Already popular
in NewYork as a place to get a reliable penne arrabbiata or marinara
pizza for under $10, prices here (as usual) are higher, but the Souk Al Bahar location on the site
where Margaux used to be means another newdining option in Downtown. Pastas, burrata,
goats cheese salads and the like should cover most tastes, but its the pizzas that are notable.
Made in ovens hand-built fromlava stone carved fromMount Vesuvius itself (well, according to
the press release) and fuelled by burning cherrywood, the thin-crust pizzas have led to Serafina
building something of a following. There are 24 on the menu so perhaps, finally, a worthy place
to fill the gap left after Downtowns fantastic Marzanos Pizza closed.
Souq Al Bahar, Downtown Dubai, +971 4 315 8100
TWO FOR XMAS
Christmas lunch? Let twoBrit
institutions dothework
RIVINGTON GRILL
How about this for a menu?
Roast turkey with all the
trimmings, apricot and
hazelnut stufing, Brussels
sprouts with chestnuts,
goose-fat roasted potatoes
with gravy, cranberry and
bread sauce. Breather. Pull a
cracker. Read out your own
joke instead. Apologise. Then
Christmas pudding with
brandy sauce or clementine
and chocolate Arctic roll, then
mince pies and cofee to end.
And the best bit is, the menu
starts on December 3rd so
you can sneak in an extra pre-
Christmas, Christmas dinner.
THE IVY
Mulled wine, turkey and all the
trimmings will be served, with
classically festive Christmas
pudding and sherry trifle to
follow as part of their brunch
from the first of the month.
They also ofer a two-tiered
festive menu from Dhs350 and
Dhs450 per head for corporate
and private events and then a
four-course set menu (Dhs550
per person) on Christmas day.
OR JUST GET IT DELIVERED
Habtoor Grand is ofering
Takeaway Turkeys with all
the trimmings from 125
December. Prices range from
Dhs600 to Dhs1,180 for a 5Kg
turkey that comes complete
with a choice of starters, main
courses and desserts. Call
04 408 4257 or email hgrs.
fbreservation@habtoorhotels.
com for full menu details.
1. Check if local laws permit the building of a
fire pit in your yard. Also check to see if you live in
an apartment.
2. Pick a location. Not under a tree. Some corner
of the yard where you envision friends sitting around
reminiscing about old times with love and friendship,
plus old jealousies bubbling just beneath the surface.
3. Measurethehole. The diameter should be
four feet or five feet. Make an X, with the intersect at
the centre of what will be your fire pit. Use string to
mark a circle on the grass around your X. Measure all
of these with a tape measure or your feet.
4. Digthehole. It should be about ten inches deep,
with the sides gently angled out, like a bowl with a
flat bottom.
5. Usinga spade, shave of the layer of grass all
around the perimeter of the pit, going back about a
foot. Use these scraps of sod to patch dead spots in
your lawn. They might take.
6. Linetheentireinside perimeter of the pit
with bricks placed vertically, as close together as you
can, and buried about two inches. You will use about
30 bricks. Then arrange the rocks along the top of
the ring, jamming each one into the sand a bit. As you
place each rock, try to fit it into the one next to it so
that they are kind of spooning.
7. Onthedirt circle around the pit, lay the remaining
bricks flat to create a hearth, with one row pointing out
like the rays of the sun, and then, finally, a row around
that, like an O, containing everything.
8. Dumpsandintothecentre of the pit and
spread evenly. Build a fire. Remove the cap from a
bottle of something nice. Pass back and forth between
you and your fishing buddy, wife, girlfriend, or other
traditional male companion. Do not pass to children.
If there are children, you could do smores.
6 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
FILM: THE SALINGER
INDUSTRYS IDOL WORSHIP
A
serious
documentary
filmabout
Oskar
Schindler
would explore not only his
courageous action saving
more than 1,100 Jews in
Nazi Germany but also
his war profiteering and
his numerous extramarital
affairs. So, too, a rigorous
investigation of Thomas
Jefferson would include
an examination of his
ownership of slaves and his
likely fathering of children
with Sally Hemings, just as a
serious biography of John F.
Kennedy or Martin Luther
King, Jr. would not declare
somehowout of bounds
their numerous extramarital
affairs. The goal cant be to
burnish a myth, but rather
to understand the subject,
to connect human strengths
with human weaknesses.
No one is beyond reasonable
inspection. No one is above
reproach. No one gets a
special pass or special
exemption. To pretend
otherwise is to reduce
history and biography
to hagiography.
Surely, a different
biographical standard
doesnt apply to J.D. Salinger
any more than it applies to
Oskar Schindler, Thomas
Jefferson, or Martin Luther
King, Jr. Anything less
than painstaking scrutiny
is to contribute mightily
to cultural amnesia, to the
airbrushing of history, to
participation in star-making
machinery, to a child-
like need to believe in a
transcendental signifier, a
purity myth of the true, the
beautiful, the uncorrupted.
The documentary film
Salinger, which I directed,
had a very successful first
weekend at the box office,
scoring the highest per-
screen average. The oral
biography Salinger, which
I co-wrote with David
Shields, has received a
number of very positive
reviews and debuted at
number six on The New
York Times bestseller list
and number three on the
independent bookseller list.
However, there have
been several reviews of the
filmthat have said, more or
less, Leave Salinger alone.
He wrote beautiful books.
Thats all we ever want to
knowabout him. And yet
I am, in a way, making a
very Salingeresque gesture:
reading past the phony
faade to the core actuality:
my goal is not to bring
Salinger down but to show
the horrific springs of art and
the endless cost of war.
I pay Salinger the
ultimate compliment of
treating him as a complex,
contradictory human
being, which is what made
his writing so good in the
first place, because its
informed by massive agony
and anxiety, that is, human
frailty. He wasnt a god.
He was just a man. Thats
the point.
Salinger writes almost
exclusively about damaged
people. Are we really willing
to pretend that the author of
such profound examinations
of damage was somehow
either undamaged himself,
or if damaged, such damage
isnt fair game? Why?
Because Salinger declared
himself a recluse and
therefore this stance must
be obeyed as if by cultural
fiat? J.D. Salinger was not
a recluse. He conducted a
one-way dialogue with the
world, communicating when
he wanted or needed to
with journalists, travelling
extensively, maintaining
lifelong friendships
and correspondences,
conducting numerous love
affairs, but throwing up a
cordon sanitaire around
himself whenever he wanted
no intrusions.
A cultural icon doesnt
get to choose when he is
or isnt a public figure. Is
he a public figure when he
publishes a book or phones
a reporter for the New York
Times or pursues underage
A director rebuts critics of his documentary
BY SHANE SALERNO
MAN AT
HIS BEST
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 6 7
girls or aggressively pursues
Hollywood actresses he
sees on television but at
all other times is a person
whose privacy is quaintly
respected? If so, why?
What cultural myth about
isolated male genius is thus
being perpetuated?
No one has disputed a
single finding in the film
or book, both of which
have been praised for the
rigor of their research, but
its as if the culture the
Salinger industry, still wildly
invested in the fairy tale of
Salinger the adored writer
of Catcher, Salinger the
remote bard of Cornish
doesnt approve of the fact
that Ive found difficult
and disturbing revelations
about its idol. As any serious
documentary filmmaker
seeks to do, I have tried to
empty out the prevailing
myth. To the degree that
some critics are upset,
they blame the messenger.
Better, I think, to heed the
complex message.
My documentary film
attempts to do what all good
biographical investigation
attempts to do, which is to
produce a full, balanced,
rigorous, and tough-minded
portrait of its subject, and in
so doing, get at hard truths.
The filmshows howSalinger
connected to all of us only
by disconnecting fromthe
world, thereby revealing our
complex, flawed humanity.
Although some critics
apparently prefer a nave
fantasy the myth of a
Christ-like figure who
was a uniquely pure and
perfect individual I invite
theminstead to confront
the very difficult nature of
serious artistic creation.
The filmand the book are
overwhelmingly about pain
and about the incredibly
delicate balance between
art and sorrowful life.
Its an almost impossible
balancing act, and for nearly
a decade Salinger managed it
miraculously.
I showthe massive
amount of suffering that
briefly fuelled the art and
then shortly afterwards
wound up largely destroying
the art and the man. By
understanding the profound
despair fromwhich
Salingers art emerged, the
viewer and the reader will
do nothing but dramatically
deepen their understanding,
appreciation and joy in
Salingers work.
As a direct result of the
filmand books success,
Salingers work has again
shot to the top of the
bestseller lists. Far from
having harmed an author
whomwe respect and
admire, were honoured
to have brought himto a
newgeneration of readers.
Nevertheless, some
critics have asserted that
I shouldnt have explored
several key elements of
Salingers life and work.
My filmis the first work
to open the door to the dark
soul of J.D. Salinger and,
as such, isnt harmless; it
empties out a myth, and it
gets people upset, which is
what a good documentary
filmis supposed to do.
People are arguing about
my film, because theres
something to argue about.
I hope you will see it and
judge for yourself.
I spent a lot of time with Jordan Belfort and I spent a lot
of time on Wall Street, I had six months of rehearsals and
research, and thats what I think is necessary to portray a
believable character. To me its a psychological portrait of
a man that has an insatiable appetite for money, women,
drugs, and absolutely no regard for anyone else except
himself [laughs].
Its a journey in that time period in the corporate world
of Wall Street, which is the setting, but its not necessarily
about Wall Street, its about a man who is just obsessed
with consumption, with a complete disregard for anyone
else. And obviously, with the times were in, its a very
interesting subject to take on: how much can we really
take for ourselves and what are the ramifications of that?
So ultimately, hes not the most sympathetic character in
the world some of the best portrayals on cinema havent
been that but it was one of the most fun experiences
Ive ever had, to work on that movie, specifically with the
director Martin Scorsese.
Whats interesting is I never really question why I want
to do a movie. Im in a very lucky position where I get
to choose the types of films that I want to be a part of,
and I dont question what Im drawn to. For some reason
though, the last three movies that I did were all about
money and greed [laughs] and power, and the descent
and fall of those characters. Gatsby is a guy who created
this vision of himself in the underworld back in the 1920s.
Django Unchained was about a plantation owner who
was obsessed with power and money, and owning slaves,
which was the currency of that time. And then Wolf of
Wall Street, set in the 90s has a very similar theme.
Wolf of Wall Street, out December 26
IF YOU SEE ONE FILM
THIS MONTH
LEONARDO DICAPRIO ON PLAYING JORDAN
BELFORT IN THE WOLF OF WALL STREET
AS TOLD TO CHRI S ANDERSON
. . . BUT FI RST RE-WATCH:
Boiler Room. The film from 2000 is also
based on the boiler room dealings of
Jordan Belfort and is one of the most
underrated films of that decade. Giovanni
Ribisi and Ben Afleck are both great,
but the revelation is Vin Diesel as Chris
Varick (a cipher for Belfort) in what is still
the best performance he will probably
ever turn in.
s
S
t
s
a
e
g
w
f
P
m
s
I
j
6 8 ESQUIRE
MAN AT
HIS BEST
All we want for Christmas is...
STUFF: THAT WE LIKE
1. WORLD TUBE MAP
A world map reimagined in the
style of Harry Becks iconic London
Underground route planner.
Dhs115 from Firebox.com
2. SANTOKU KNIFE
The Evercut Furtif knife is not the only
all-black cooking knife on the market,
but the only one weve seen that has
the angles of a B-2 Stealth Bomber.
Dhs490 from tb-groupe.fr
3. COUNTERBALANCED
TURNTABLE
Fully suspended turntable that uses
dual counter-rotating platters to
eliminate sonic aberrations and
creating the lowest noise floor of any
turntable available. And it looks lovely,
but it doesnt come cheap.
Dhs102,760 from hammacher.com
4. AREAWARE CLOCK
Install the app and then dock your
iPhone to create an homage to those
old GE flip clocks we once used.
Dhs140 fromareaware.com
5. MARTIN JETPACK
Set to be on the market next year, this
uses ducted fans (rather than an actual
jet) to provide lift and runs of a 2.0-litre
V4 piston 200-horsepower engine.
Itll do 60mph, has an 8,000ft flight
ceiling and a flight time about 30 mins.
Ballistic parachute included.
Around Dhs450,000 from
martinjetpack.com
6. ANTEATER BUG VAC
Get rid of that bugoh dont kill it!
This anteater bug vac sucks themup
(into a viewing chamber) humanely
so you can remove spiders without
leaving a mess or upsetting the wife.
Dhs75 fromamazon.com
DECEMBER 2013
A mark of true design
www.mido.ch
Multifort
Elaborate automatic movement, stainless steel
case with PVD coating, non-reecting sapphire
crystal, screwed transparent caseback and
crown, water-resistant up to a pressure of 10 bar
(100 m / 330 ft).
Harbour Bridge, Sydney, Australia
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 7 1
ESQ.
These modest Louis Vuitton envelope wallets may be compact,
but each one can fit in six credit cards and two ID cards, and
has two compartments for receipts and papers and two for
notes. So, while the numerous pockets will have you ready and
prepared for the most debaucherous of festive occasions, the
slim-fit sillhouette of your party pants wont be compromised.
Multiple Portfolio Leather Damier Infini, Dhs2,590; Multiple Portfolio Leather
Damier Infini solar, Dhs2,950; Portfolio Multiple Damier Graphite canvas,
Dhs1,790; blue leather wallet Multiple Federalist and Federalist Leather Wallet
Multiple Bordeaux, both Dhs3,300 each.
W
O
R
D
S
:
K
A
T
E
H
A
Z
E
L
L
.
P
H
O
T
O
G
R
A
P
H
:

L
O
U
I
S
V
U
I
T
T
O
N
/
C
O
P
P
I
B
A
R
B
I
E
R
I
SLI M PI CKI NG
7 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
STYLE RADAR
ESQ
S
I NCOMI NG THI S MONTH
COMP I L E D BY K AT E HA Z E L L
BUSI NESS
CLASS
Christopher Bailey is one step ahead again,
with the launch of Burberrys new Travel
Tailoring collection making uncomfortable
or scruffy travelling a thing of the past.
Taking traditional, classic suits but using a
combination of advanced tailoring, fabrics
and innovative cuts, each suit flexes with
body movement, making it comfortable,
while retaining its shape. Innovative
lightweight shoulder construction and
naturally flexible fabrics also help when
stepping off of a red eye and immediately
into a business meeting.
WeekendWardrobe
Denim has been the failsafe wardrobe
essential of men for decades, so
its handy to know that a new store
dedicated to the stuf has just opened
in Kuwait City. The Denim Room, owned
by local entrepreneur Dana Al Khaboaizi,
is now open in Shuwaikh Market and
stocks more than 20 brands of the
versatile pant from all over the world.
While the store also carries denim for
women too, wed recommend checking
out New York brand BLK DNM for
distressed, cigarette and slim jeans
thatll look like youve been loving them
for years.
a
ma een
spotted on the likes of Chris Brown and
Tinie Tempah and its cutting a fine shape
in our wardrobes with its eclectic designs.
The founder, Saudi designer Mohammed
Khoja, has created a concept whereby each
tee is a walking piece of art, making them
perfect for men who like to be stared at or
turn heads.
www.para-phernalia.com
ESQ.
Styleeeeeeeeee
EXHIBITIONIST
Middle Eastern tee brand Paraphernalia
ay only be a year old but has already be
THREE
STYLISH
SCENTS
FRESH
Moschino Forever Sailing
A unique blend of classic
notes of musk and
patchouli with notes of
lavender and juniper
berries make this a fresh
and airy scent.
Dhs260.
SPICY
Polo Red
Fruity fresh grapefruit and
deep red wood is blended
with fiery red safron.
Dhs224.
WOODY
YSL Pour Homme Intense
This more intense
composition of YSLs
original Pour Homme is a
blend of citruses, spices,
woody and floral notes.
Dhs275.
THE GLOBETROTTING SUIT
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 7 3
Fuel For Thought
The problem with shopping malls in the UAE is that a
food hall is just not going to cut it should you wish to
take a lady for a nice post-shopping dinner. Which is why
wed recommend trying out Ibn Battuta Gates Italian
restaurant, Sicilia. Serving some of the best Italian fare
weve tried in the city, the spot is just a stones throw from
Ibn Battuta Mall and chef Stefano Ligori has constructed
a menu of Mediterranean favourites with excellent twists.
Wed recommend the slow-cooked poached cod, which
sits on a fresh broccoli soup and a bed of meaty baby
squid. +971 04 444 5613
FINISHING TOUCH
Dolce & Gabbana recently launched its first collection of haute
horologerie watches, combining Italian design with Swiss
craftsmanship. The new DG7+ collection is made up of two
models, one with a rubber strap and one with a metal bracelet,
each with a half-moon shaped calendar positioned at six oclock,
Arabic numerals for the hours and a satin-finish dial making
them the perfect complement to the dapper mans wardrobe.
NEW
RANGE
THE CONSUMER
Chukkashirt on
The Ralph Lauren International
Ladies Polo Tournament will be held
this month under the patronage of
Her Highness Sheikha Maitha Bint
Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum.
To celebrate, the US label has
designed this polo tee available to buy
exclusively in their UAE boutiques,
Dhs830, with 20 per cent of all sales
going to Dubai Cares.
Desert Palm from December 1013
7 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Shaving cream
Dhs228
Shaving oil
Dhs200
at Bloomingdales
Facial cleansing
scrub
Dhs 180
at Bloomingdales
Soft shaving cream
Dhs230
at Bloomingdales
Revitalising eye
treatment
Dhs193
at saksfifthavenue.com
Revitalising face cream
Dhs217
at saksfifthavenue.co
Shaving brush
and razor set
Dhs2,210
at Bloomingdales
SHAVI NG:
A CHORE NO MORE
Acquadi Parmasluxuriousnewshaving
kit makesagoodmorninggreat
I
f you dont knowvenerable Italian fragrance
company Acqua di Parma for its musky, citrusy,
grown-up scent favoured by David Niven and
Cary Grant youll probably knowits egg-yolk
yellowpackaging. Heres a curveball: the brands
newshaving collection, Collezione Barbiere, actually comes in a
fetching shade of dark plum, but dont let that throwyou.
Consisting of a shaving cream, shaving oil, a refreshing
moisturising balm, a revitalising eye treatment and a posh shaving
brush and razor, the kit contains everything you need to take on
the day and win.
ESQ.
Style
GROOMING
7 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
STYLE
Jeans JKL (my own
brand). Theyre cut
neither slim nor
baggy; lets call
them fitted.
Shoes Blue suede
by Tods.
Suit Dolce & Gabbana
with medium rise in
TRAVEL
ShopI can spend a fun
couple of hours in
Whole Foods.
DestinationIve done
a lot of travelling in
Africa and South
America. I pick a
country and backpack
through it.
SuitcaseKelty 4400
frame backpack.
Hotel The Greenwich
Hotel, New York.
ClubHyde Lounge,
Los Angeles. Where
I met my wife.
HOME
LampA flying-saucer
lamp in the living room.
The kids think its a
spaceship.
Desk A large
drafting board
in my music studio.
Chair A barstool.
Bedlinen Light,
thin silk.
Sofa Custom-made. Im
keen on ergonomics.
TECHNOLOGY
Car 2010 GMC Denali.
Camera iPhone 4S.
LaptopMacBook Pro.
PEOPLE
Fictional styleicon
Jesus Christ was pretty
cool. Hes not fictional,
but he was smooth.
FOOD & DRINK
WineGrosjean Fumin
Valle dAosta.
Beer Cold Coors Light
in a can, not a bottle.
DishCheeseburger.
Snack Macadamia
nuts, kale chips.
Sweets My morning
tea with agave. And
I like a chocolate pie
with meringue.
Restaurant
My kitchen.
MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY
ith his laid-back drawl and defined pecs, youd be forgiven
for regarding MatthewMcConaughey as the all-American
b ock of the filmworld. But thats not his whole story.
appearances in Killer Joe, Mud and Magic Mike have
Texan increasing critical acclaim. This November, his
te Leonardo DiCaprio in Martin Scorseses The Wolf
treet looks to extend that winning run. All well and
but what toothpaste does he use?
TOOLS
Subscriptions
The Week, Time,
Garden & Gun.
Motorcycle2004
Triumph Thunderbird
Sport.
PenSharpie Fine Point.
KnifeA friend, Guy
Fieri [restaurateur
and Diners, Drive-Ins
& Dives host],
made
GROOMING
ToothpasteCrest.
ShavingfoamMario
Badescu Shaving
Cream.
Moisturiser
Jurlique Calendula
Cream.
Facewash Jurlique
Foaming Cleanser.
Shower gel Cetaphil
soap. I dont like the
gels at all, Im a bar
of soap guy.
Shampoo
Moroccan Oil
Shampoo/
Conditioner
mix.
SerumLiquid
collagen.
Towels Just
make sure
theyre soft and
not stif.
d
THE ACTOR AND FACE OF DOLCE & GABBANA
FRAGRANCES ON HIS FAVOURITE STUFF
THE LIST
FOOD & DRIN F D R N
ber-jo b j e j
Rece t Re n
garnered the T d th T g n r t e
role opposit l i e p o
of Wall St of Wall S oo WW ll
good b good b oo
made me m d m
a bunch a bunch aa u c
of about of about o aa uu
20 arge, 2 l g
wonderfu w n e l
chefs knives. h f k i c e kk v
ESQ.
Style
the front. In blue to
match my skin tone and
eyes.
Boxer shorts
I wouldnt know.
Socks We have a lot of
fun with socks in our
family; we have socks
of every shape, colour
and design. I like a thin
dress sock more than a
thick one.
Sunglasses Dolce
& Gabbana aviators.
Sneakers Nike Free
Runs, 2011 edition.
Wallet My brother-in-
law gave me the wallet
I have now. I like a very
thin wallet. He
found me a really
nice leather one
in Brazil.
7 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
ESQ.
Style
T
he last couple of months have
been a busy time for watch
fans across the UAE. I was
lucky enough to be invited to
quite a fewof the horological
events; the first being the Grand Prix
dHorlogerie de Genve (GPHD) trunk
show, organised by Ahmed Seddiqi &
Sons and hosted by the Cuadro Fine
Art Gallery in DIFC. The event was
inaugurated by HHSheikh Majid bin
Mohammed, chairman of Dubai Culture
and Arts Authority.
The GPHDis basically a contest
between high-end watch manufacturers
at the Geneva Watch Festival. It gives
us a glimpse of 70 pre-selected watches
chosen by a jury of experts split over 10
categories covering an array of watches,
fromgrand complications all the way to
sports watches. The winner receives the
title Aiguille dOr, the most prestigious
award in watchmaking. Last year it was
won by TAGHeuers MikroGirder, the
year before by DeBethunes DB28. It is the
first time this trunk showhas made it to
the region and Imhopeful we will see this
event returning each year.
One of my personal favourites was the
newMayu Red Gold by H. Moser &Cie.
At just under 39mmit is a great-looking
watch, priced at Dhs65,000. The colour
of the dial when
seen in the flesh is
amazing. I also liked
the Girard-Perregaux
Constant Escapement
LM. Its a big watch
at 48mm, but with
good reason; its a
breakthrough in the
field of chronometry,
with a completely
newarchitecture
and design of the
escapement, featuring
three different patents. It also looks cool,
but does not come cheaply at Dhs500,000.
For a look at all the entries go to gphg.org.
Next up was the watch collectors
get-together, again organised by Ahmed
Seddiqi &Sons. This was an opportunity
for enthusiasts fromthe region to meet
informally and chat about what makes
themtick (pardon the pun). People bought
along their collections for others to view
and when I say collections, I mean
collections. It made my eyes water as I got
to try on watches that are rarely seen.
At the event I was introduced to the
Instagrammer, Watch Anish. Anish and his
teamgather images of some of the finest
watches fromaround the world and post
themon Instagram. They have been really
successful, gaining a large following and
their website (watch-anish.com) is worth a
look as it has some great images.
Having barely caught my breath, I was
lured by the Christies watch auction,
which was back in town. Frederic
Watrelot, the auction houses Dubai-based
watch expert put together a good selection
and I think all the watches pretty much
hit the estimates. One real surprise was
a Rolex ring watch with a guide price of
around only $6,000 to $8,000 (featured
in last months Watch Book) that sold for
around $40,000. The person who bought
this obviously knows more than I do.
Hopefully, this job well done will ensure
they are back next year with an even more
comprehensive selection. (Fred, I am
hoping for a fewmore vintage Rolexes
next time!)
And finally, it was time to dust off
my tux for the Abu Dhabi FilmFestival,
whose main sponsor is one of my favourite
brands, Jaeger-LeCoultre. Held at the
Emirates Palace, it was the first time I had
walked down the red carpet, and my Zara
tux, altered by my favourite tailor in Satwa,
did me proud. On the other hand, my
wife spent months planning her dress for
the event. I think we went through every
possible red carpet dress worn in the past
five years, and finally a custom-made outfit
was decided upon. Ouch.
Once we had negotiated our way down
the carpet (its scarier than it looks), it
was on to the main event, the opening-
night feature film, Life of Crime. As part of
the opening ceremony, Forest Whitaker
was given an outstanding achievement
award, presented by Daniel Riedo, the
CEOof Jaeger-LeCoultre. The award
was accompanied by a particularly nice
Reverso watch. I got chance to mingle
with some pretty serious watch addicts,
including Wonho Chung, the Arabic-
speaking Korean comedian/ watch addict.
I wrote about himin one of my early
columns and its great to see that he is
nowan official friend of Jaeger-LeCoultre.
For the event he was wearing a semi-
skeletonised Duomtre Chronographe in
pink gold a personal favourite of mine.
Hats off to Jaeger-LeCoultre for a
very classy and successful event. It will
be interesting to see how IWC and its
partnership with this months Dubai Film
Festival compares. My Zara tux has been
pressed and is ready to go.
CONFESSI ONS
OF A WATCH
ADDI CT
BY SAM TRUMAN
THIS MONTH:
THE REGI ON S WATCH
COMMUNI TY GOES I NTO
OVERDRI VE
p
Wanho sporting his Duomtre Chronographe
(pictured left)
H. Moser &Cies
Mayu Red Gold
Acouple of the
timepieces modelled
by enthusiasts
at the Ahmed
Seddiqi &Sons
watch-collectors
get-together
www.corum.ch
ADMIRALS CUP REINVENTED,
BREAKING THE WAVES FOR MORE THAN 50 YEARS
8 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
ESQ.
Style
MAN ABOUT TOWN
TedBakersnewAbuDhabi boutiqueserves
thecapital withfneBritishfair
TedBaker is spreadingits quintessentially Britishstyle further afield with
the opening of a second Abu Dhabi store, in the prestigious World Trade Centre
Mall. The 2,893-square-foot boutique, which has interiors and decor reminiscent
of an old English manor house, showcases the latest womenswear, accessories and,
most importantly, menswear collections. Whether youre a man-about-town or a true
country gent, Teds taken the express line to dapper and debonair for this seasons
menswear collection, which makes this newstore one to stop in at. Mustards and
muted teal tones sit alongside dark reds and purples to deliver an essential collection
of menswear separates that puts the aah into suave. While their tailoring line
has all your dapper deals done, your weekend wardrobe need not suffer as slim
charcoal chinos, slouchy leather totes and comfy fine knitwear will have you just as
gentlemanly come Friday morning. To make things a little easier for you, Esquire has
cherrypicked some personal favourites.
www.tedbaker.com
Shirt, Dhs550
Blazer, Dhs1,850
Shirt, Dhs550
Blazer, Dhs2,225
Trousers, Dhs525 Trousers, Dhs735
Bag, Dhs775
Waistcoat, Dhs745 Abu Dhabis new Ted Baker boutique, above
AT.MOSPHERE RESTAURANT
T +971 4 888 3828
E [email protected]
CUISINE
AS SUPERB AS
THESKY
SURROUNDING IT
Choose fromthe globes prime turf oferings including
Blackmore Wagyu and Black Angus beef or its most
exquisite fresh-from-the-surf selection.
And if the worlds most gorgeous grills are not enough
for you, then feast your eyes andyour palate on some of
the temptingchoices fromthe modern European menu.
Open daily for lunch and dinner.
RESTAURANT | DRINKS | ENTERTAINMENT
PRADA SAFFIANO
LEATHER TROLLEY
Sleek, classic and minimalist. This
iconic Prada cabin trolley comes
in a rainbowof shades and is
embossed with the Italian brands
iconic safiano pattern for a subtly
textured surface. Available in a
plethora of colours, youll find a
hade for every occasion and,
erhaps, every destination.
MENSIONS47.5 x 33.5 x
M MATERIAL Exterior:
ano leather PRICE
Dhs15,420
p
sh
pe
DIM
16.5CM
Safia
8 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
LOUIS VUITTON
MALLE SHERPA HARD SIDED
The mountains of the Himalayas and
the Kingdomof Bhutan inspired this
unusual piece fromMens Style Director
KimJones. Not wildly practical but
it does include a warmblanket that
can be rolled up and stored below, as
well as hand-worked metal rivets and
reinforced leather corners. The internal
compartments comprise two large
pull-out drawers and even a secret
compartment beneath for private
documents. Sherpa not included.
DIMENSIONS71 x 20 x 41CM
MATERIALEXTERIOR: Nomad calf
leather PRICE: Dhs253,452
GLOBE-TROTTER SPECIAL
EDITION 21IN CARRY-ON CASE
With a heritage spanning more than
a century, this classic double-strap
luggage case fromBritish brand
Globe-Trotter has a devoted fanbase
with its timeless design. Used by Sir
Edmund Hillary during his conquest
of Everest in 1953, it efortlessly
evokes the old-school glamour of
travel. Think brown leather trims,
designer stamped polished brass
hardware, an internal plaque an
push-lock fastening, not to men
an extendible trolley handle an
discreet wheels for when th
gets tough. All handmade in
DIMENSIONS54 x 38
MATERIALEXTERIOR:
fibreboard PRICED
ALFRED DUNHILL
TRAVELLER LEATHER TROLLEY
Classic Alfred Dunhill functionality
shines through with this piece. The main
compartment is divided into two, with a
secondary zipped area and mesh pocket
along with elasticated bands that keep your
clothing in place. We like the smoothness of
its wheels that complement its streamlined
design, while the discreetly embossed AD
logo on the back adds a luxurious touch to
this travel companion.
DIMENSIONS47.5 x 33.5 x 16.5CM
MATERIALExterior: Soft calf leather in a
matte finish PRICEPrice upon application
s
nd
ntion
nd two
e going
n England.
8 x 18CM
: Vulcanised
Dhs5,450
BERLUTI FORMULA 1000 VENEZIA
A beauty to behold, this is one piece you
wouldnt want out of your sight. Standout
features include the efortless manoeuvrability
of its wheels, the spacious simplicity of the main
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(all hand-patinaed of course). The trolley also
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for a diferent look. Just in case you need to
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DIMENSIONS56 x 36 x 23CM MATERIAL
Exterior: Gloria Venezia leather with hand-
patina finish PRICEDhs34,481
WHEELY
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LUGGAGE
THERES LUGGAGE YOUTHROWIN
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THANYOUR FLIGHT.
BOTTEGA VENETA NERO
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The subtle texture of Bottegas
unmistakable hand-woven intrecciato
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brands take on quiet luxury. The solid
black exterior makes this handy for
work or business travel; while external
pockets, a wide internal zip and woven
leather handles put the spotlight on the
details. A cabin trolley that practically
purrs along.
DIMENSIONS23 x 46.5 x 35.6CM
MATERIALExterior: Intrecciato VN
leather PRICEDhs24,350
ESQ.
Style
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 8 5
Thepressuresontoget the
perfect present, soweve
searchedhighandlowand
dugout thesegiftsthatll
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COMPILEDBYKATEHAZELL
8 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
H
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Leather penny loafer shoes,
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iPad case, Dhs1,123,
Dolce &Gabbana at
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Watch, Dhs51,235,
Baume et Mercier
Jumper, Dhs1,859,
Cruciani
Umbrella, Dhs1,887, Alexander
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Eames lounge chair and Ottoman,
Dhs30,000
Acqua Di Parma, Colonia Intensa
aftershave, Dhs270
Leather
belt,
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8 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBEE 201 ER 2 13
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Necklace, Dhs5,509,
Chanel
Monica lipstick, Dhs121
Dolce & Gabbana
Watch, Dhs2,250,
Nina Ricci
Bath oil, Dhs367
Chanel No5
Dempsey shoe,
Dhs3,417
Jimmy Choo
Shoes, Dhs4,339,
Chloe
Jumper, Dhs4,345,
Marc Jacobs
Perfume, Dhs288,
Pleats Please by Issey Miyake
Bracelet, Dhs470,
Juicy Couture
Bag,
price upon request,
Dior
9 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Jacket, Dhs1,500,
Lacoste
Checkered shirt, Dhs495,
Tommy Hilfiger
Black tie sunglasses, Dhs1,358,
Dior Homme
Belt, Dhs129,
Scotch &Soda
Tipped polo shirt,
Dhs554, Moncler
F-80 watch,
Dhs7,757,
Salvatore
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R3 safari camera, around Dhs5,509, Leica
Harlemsatchel, Dhs1,335,
Ted Baker
Cycling shirt, Dhs338,
Bookman
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Dhs404,
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Red nail
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9 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
You have to have a thick skin in this business. Dale
Wintons sunbed addiction means hes developed a
teak-tough brown hide. Mines not quite as thick.
The eczema on my tummy and arms has seen to that.
To get the measure of a man, I try to establish three facts:
what they drive; where their holiday home is; howmuch cash
they have on themat any one time. Me? Kia, Cowes, 300.
ErmFour 50s, four 20s, a 10, a five and five pound coins.
For the parking meter.
When it comes to charities, my particular favourites are
ones to do with Africa. Ive done more charity raffles for
Africans than theyve had hot dinners.
My greatest fear? Being at a charity event and everyone in
a roomsuddenly having white eyes and robotic voices. I turn
and run but they fire lasers at me fromtheir hands and mouths.
Somehow, I dodge the beams and find cover behind a cabinet,
but I knowI dont have long. With the demonic zombies
stumbling towards me, I make my move, sprinting towards
the wall and diving headlong into an air duct. Hours later, I
have escaped and alerted the Army. But when we return to the
charity event, it is a wasteland. Nothing has been spared and
as I turn to leave, I glimpse a sickening sight. Amid the ashes is
a tiny hand still clutching a teddy bear. Ahorrible thought and
I only hope none of it ever comes to pass.
I used to sleep in Egyptian cotton until the Arab Spring.
Now, I open out a sleeping bag and use it as a duvet.
People assume Im constantly surrounded by celebrity
friends, but its not like that. I used to Skype chat with
[Sky News presenter] Eamonn Holmes every Sunday morning
but he started to do it from the bath and I didnt like that.
It wasnt his flesh the bubble bath covered that it was
the fact hed be eating sliders while he chatted to me (theyre
basically small burgers). With the suds on his face, he was like
Santa playing Pac-Man.
Broadcasting is like sex. You need balls, imagination,
sensitivity and, ideally, a towel.
It absolutely staggers me that people keep their eggs in a
fridge. Eggshells will maintain integrity at roomtemperature
for at least 21 days but at lowtemperatures the outer
mucoprotein cuticle dries and shrinks, exposing the pores in
the calciumcarbonate shell. This increases the probability of
bacterial contamination by about five per cent. But keep your
eggs where you want. Its your funeral.
Ima Marmite DJ. Some people love me, others like me. But all
respect me.
I amin great shape. I start a diet every Monday and have
taken the batteries out of my TV remote so that I have to
physically approach the television to change channel. Its
annoying but punishes my abs, quads and backside muscles.
Cant remember what backside muscles are called.
Wisdomcan be found in many forms. It could be a shaman
in a cave. Or a witch doctor in a cave. But it can also be found
in the guise of a not-unbusty 65-year-old woman called Lynn
Benfield, my assistant. Unkind people say shes frumpy, dumpy
and grumpy, which sounds like three dwarves. Then again,
froma distance she does resemble three midgets huddled in
her dead mums coat.
Wagamama is tasty but I shant be going again. Order a
noodle soup and youre presented with chopsticks and a spoon
and a tactical conundrum. Its down to you to regulate your
consumption of solids and broth. Too much of the former and
youre left with a puddle of empty soup; too much of the latter
and its a cold nest of noodles.
It took so much concentration, Imashamed to say I
neglected to chat with my guest, Glen. In the end, I thought sod
this and went and bought a Whopper.
My best-ever holiday was an all-inclusive fortnight in
Orlando. They wanted 1,200 for it but I got themdown
to 950 and when I got there my roomwas soiled so I was
upgraded to a deluxe, which should have cost 1,500 all-in.
Thats a pretty tidy saving of 550. You should have seen their
faces. And thats why the fortnight in Orlando was my best-
ever holiday.
My autobiography broke the mould. It came with its own
suggested soundtrack. I spent three days with my iPod
creating a list of songs that would provide the perfect mood
music to accompany my life. My publishers said this wasnt
necessary. In fact, they specifically told me not to bother, as
they werent willing to pay for the production or dispatch of a
CD, and certainly werent going to seek clearance from, or pay
royalties to, the artists Id chosen. I did it anyway.
In 1967, I misdiagnosed myself with cancer of the ball bag.
Turned out it was just an infected paper cut on my nether
regions. Next question.
Whats the one thing Id save if my house was on fire?
Contents insurance documentation. Those people will screw
you given half a chance. If its all the same to you, Ill keep a
copy of the policy for my records, thanks.
A-ha. Its both my catchphrase and the name of a Swedish,
or Norwegian, pop group. I met them once in the bar of
the Hilton Gatwick, and we laughed about who owned the
copyright! Now, whenever the band release a new LP, Morten
[Harket] sends me a copy, along with a photo of himself in a
Pringle jumper giving a double thumbs-up. Just realised he
might be mocking me.
I amand always have been an only child. But I would
have loved a little brother to play football with or bully. Id
rush downstairs every Christmas morning and rip open my
presents, hoping against hope that one of the boxes contained
a human baby. It rarely did. In fact, it never did.
ALAN
PARTRI DGE
PRESENTER AND CONFERENCE HOST, 55
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 9 5
WHAT I VE L E ARNE D
Alan Partridge: Alpha
Papa is available to order
onDVDfromDecember 2.
Sample quote: Shes a
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amazon.com
9 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
THE MAN
WHO
KIDNAPPED
LIBYAS
PRIME
MINISTER
Noone is quite sure of the details behindthe
extraordinary abductionof Libyas leader. Inan
exclusive interview, Esquire meets the leader of
the militia groupthat took himtotry andfindout
what exactly happenedonOctober 10
WORDS AND PICTURES BY WIL CRISP
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 9 7
HE LEADER OF LIBYAS
STRANGESTand most daring
military operation since the
revolution is disappointingly
nondescript in person.
Abdelmonemal-Said is clean-
shaven and seemingly unarmed.
Aside froma hard, challenging
stare, he isnt physically imposing
and is not even wearing military
fatigues or carrying a gun. Instead
hes dressed in a short-sleeved polo
shirt and blue jeans.
Nothing about his appearance hints at the extraordinary events
two weeks before our meeting. On October 10, al-Said led dozens
of men armed with machine guns and rocket-propelled grenades
on a successful early-morning raid into Tripolis luxurious
Corinthia Hotel. They captured Libyas prime minister, Ali Zeidan,
and held himfor more than eight hours.
The kidnap plunged an already troubled country deeper into
political turmoil, sparking international concern about Libyas
worsening security and out-of-control militias. Zeidan was only
released when the base where he was being held was surrounded
by a mishmash of pro-government militiamen, army forces and
concerned gun carrying citizens all demanding the prime
ministers release.
In the days following his abduction, Ali Zeidan named
Abdelmonemal-Said as one of the men who interrogated him
while he was detained and labelled the kidnapping an attempted
coup. But when al-Said talks about it he makes it sound like a
normal day in the office. Zeidan is a criminal and I arrested him,
he says with a dismissive shrug, as if he was talking about detaining
a shoplifter or a joyrider.
Its late at night and were in
al-Saids sparsely decorated family
apartment, located in a in a quiet
Tripoli suburb. Imsqueezed on
a narrowsofa with my translator,
Majdi; al-Said sits across fromus
behind a cheap coffee table on the
rooms only other chair. Eight of
al-Saids men are squatting against
the far wall. All are dressed in civilian
clothes. They appear to be anxious
though unarmed, and watch our
conversation with interest.
Abdelmonemal-Said is the
leader of a unit in Libyas Anti-
Crime Authority, a police force that
comes under the Interior Ministry,
but has been accused by its critics
of corruption and involvement in
criminal activities. We were able to
track himdown following a tip-off
froma friend-of-a-friend, who told us
that al-Said wanted to tell his side of
the story.
Our hope was that hed be able
to give us some kind of insight into
whats really going on in post-
revolutionary Libya, a world thats
becoming increasingly difficult for
observers to understand.
More than two years after the revolution, bombing and
assassinations take place on a weekly basis. The country is awash
with guns and it has myriad armed organisations, all of whomare
competing for power. These groups come in a bewildering variety
of forms. Many are funded and armed by the government but each
has its own agenda. Its a world where the line between political
parties and militias is blurred; where intimidation is routinely
used to influence votes and violence against local journalists is
depressingly common.
There are groups that work directly, albeit covertly, for political
parties; groups made up of Islamic radicals who want to do away
with democracy entirely and implement strict Sharia law; groups
that demand regional autonomy and have seized control of key oil
infrastructure; groups nominally under government authority that
have taken advantage of the administrative chaos to make money
by selling drugs or run weapons and people across Libyas poorly
defended borders.
Its a political scene that increasingly resembles the Wild
West, and al-Said is right there at heart of it. He talks of himself as
one of those loose cannon lawmen that often feature in Western
movies; the kind of person who plays by his own rules and always
gets results, a patriot battling on the side of justice amid rampant
corruption and a disintegrating judicial system.
Abdelmonemal-Said founded his unit in the midst of Libyas
2011 civil war. It was tasked by the rebel government in-waiting
with preventing looting and enforcing lawin territories under its
control. Following the revolution it was incorporated, like many
other rebel groups, into the official security forces, becoming a unit
in Libyas Anti-Crime Authority. But according to Tripoli security
chief, Khalid Shanta, al-Saids group failed to integrate properly.
Speaking after the abduction he said that the units members
remained primarily loyal to al-Said rather than the Anti-Crime
Authoritys senior commanders. Al-
Said, he complained, has a tendency
to ignore orders fromabove.
When questioned about his
groups history of disobedience
al-Said says the country needs real
revolutionaries like himand his men;
individuals willing to do whatever
is necessary to keep the revolution
on track. He explains howthat prior
to the raid he went to the attorney
generals office to request a genuine
arrest warrant for the prime minister,
based on evidence of corruption that
his group had collected. Only when it
was refused was he forced to create a
fake, which was then brandished by
Zeidans abductors to help themgain
access to the hotel.
Our warrant may have been a
bluff but Zeidans corruption is one
hundred percent genuine, he rants at
one point, brandishing a large pile of
documents. These papers, he claims,
contain proof of involvement in drug
dealing and violence against political
opponents. He also accuses the prime
minister of having a German passport,
a bold claimin a country where dual
citizenship is against the lawfor the
most senior politicians.
ZEIDAN IS A CRIMINAL
AND I ARRESTED HIM HE SAYS
WITH A DISMISSIVE SHRUG, AS IF
HE WAS TALKING ABOUT DETAINING
A SHOPLIFTER OR A JOYRIDER.
T
9 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
When I point out to al-Said that his accusations havent been
verified by any other sources, he retorts that there hasnt been
a proper investigation, despite his best efforts at instigating one.
Its clear that he wants to be seen as a man who has right on his
side a kind of Libyan Judge Dredd.
The problemis that fewLibyans see himthis way. In Tripolis
smoky coffee shops, many speculate that al-Said and the other
men who abducted the prime minister may have been working
under orders fromsenior political figures with links to the Muslim
Brotherhood. Over the last twelve months tensions have increased
between the Liberal-leaning Ali Zeidan, who has close ties to
the west, and Libyas Justice and Construction Party, a political
organisation linked to the MuslimBrotherhood that is highly
suspicious of Europe and Americas
political and business interests in the
country. In the weeks leading up to the
abduction, Justice and Construction
repeatedly called for Zeidan to stand down
and launched a number of failed attempts
to dislodge the prime minister through a
no-confidence vote in parliament.
Other critics say al-Saids unit is one
of the many Libyan militias involved in
highly profitable criminal activities. They
accuse it of selling drugs and dealing in
illicitly obtained cars, and speculate that
the operation to kidnap Zeidan was an act
of revenge for an attempted crackdown on
their activities. Al-Said is only too aware
of his image problem, but insists that the
abduction was about old-fashioned justice
rather than politics or personal gain. People must understand
that it is Zeidan who is the criminal on the run, not me, he says,
jabbing his finger in the air forcefully to press his point home.
As the night goes on, the already tense atmosphere becomes
increasingly fraught. Al-Said starts to switch rapidly between
disarming charmand paranoid aggression. At one point he
suggests that Majdi and myself could be spies sent to extract
incriminating evidence fromhim. Minutes later hes rhapsodising
about howmuch he likes Europeans and Americans, praising the
Nato intervention that helped dislodge Gaddafi.
Al-Said is in a unique position to shed light on the events of
October 10 and also reveal the inner mechanics of Libyas chaotic
political scene. But hes reluctant to discuss key questions such as
howhis men managed to disarmZeidans bodyguards without a
shot being fired, and who was behind the operation.
Some speculate that Zeidans bodyguards were in on the
plan. Others say they were merely outnumbered and caught on
unawares by the attackers. When questioned, al-Said smiles and
refuses to talk about it, preferring to launch into long monologues
about Zeidans alleged corruption and rail against his critics.
At one point, a guard in the roomtells us that al-Said moves
constantly around the city, keeping a number of men by his side
as a precaution against possible attacks frompro-government
militias. But when we ask al-Said about his security measures
he dismisses themas just in case and says hes not afraid of
retaliation fromthe prime minister. Imstill here. Imstill walking
the streets and answering my phone,
he says with a grin as he brandishes his
Nokia. Zeidan wants to do me harm;
I knowhe wants to, but the fact is hes too
weak to do anything.
When we get up to leave, we shake
hands with each of al-Saids men one by
one, mindful of the rules of hospitality.
Theres a feeling of relief that were getting
out of the stifling atmosphere of paranoia
that permeates his house, but also a sense
that even after an hour of talking were
no closer to understanding just howsaid
he fits into the bigger picture. Was the
operation to abduct the prime minister
a coup dtat planned by senior political
figures that went wrong? Was it a revenge
attack carried out by a criminal gang?
Or just a spur-of the moment plan made up by an ambitious militia
leader who simply wanted what he considered to be justice?
Peppered with contradictions and hyperbole, its impossible to
knowwhere the facts stop and fiction begins in al-Saids testimony.
But at the same time his bravado and paranoia speak volumes
about howthe political situation in Libya is developing. This is a
nation comprised of a complicated and rapidly shifting network of
allegiances; a game of chance where its impossible for participants
to second-guess who might kick down their door in the middle
of the night. AbdelmonemAl-Saids omissions and exaggerations
reveal a country where power is still very much up for grabs and
the streets are full of guns and ambitious men who all claimto be
the real revolutionaries.
ZEIDAN WANTS TO
DO ME HARM. I KNOW HE WANTS
TO, BUT THE FACT IS HES TOO
WEAK TO DO ANYTHING
(Left) The Corinthia Hotel
Right) Tripolis besieged
foreign ministry in April
this year. (Previous spread
left to right) Abdelmonem
al-Said; Prime Minister
Ali Zeidan at a press
conference following
his release.
1 0 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
I was in my Russian university,
South Ural State University.
We were in the middle of our
linguistics class when we saw
an unnatural light outside the
window of our fourth-floor
classroom. At first it was a
white light. It became a little bit
yellow and then it was a flash.
It looked like a plane, but the
tail was like two tails, and it was
wider and brighter, coloured
white and yellow. We thought
maybe it was a military plane,
because at the end of our city
there is a military institute
where students are taught to
be pilots.
We decided to come close
to the windows. That was our
mistake. Five, ten seconds
after the flash, there was an
explosion and all the windows
broke. Many people were
injured because of the glass.
I had little cuts on my hands.
We heard the car alarms
outside as we went down
closer to the street.
A crowd appeared in front
of the university. We looked
at the building. It is about
ten floors, and almost every
window was broken. There
were ideas of what was going
on, but still nobody knew
the truth. We were afraid
of radiation. Maybe it was
terrorism. A war beginning.
We started to call our parents,
but there was no connection.
All phones stopped working for
thirty, forty minutes.
My father came to take me
home. My mother is a doctor.
She told me to drink red wine
medicine for the radiation
and put iodine to the palms of
FEBRUARY 1 5, 9: 20 A . M.
RUSSIANMETEORSTRIKE
OLESYAPEREVYSHINA, STUDENT, CHELYABINSK, RUSSIA
ANAMAZINGYEAR REPLAYED
THROUGH THE WORDS ANDLIVES OF
MANY OF THOSE WHOSHAPEDIT
my hands and to close
the windows at the house.
I was lucky. We live on the first
floor our windows were not
broken but those who live
higher up had to cover broken
windows with blankets and
plastic wrap.
Even after we knew it was
a meteorite, people continued
to say there could be radiation.
The authorities told us they
measured the level and it was
okay, but we didnt believe
them completely. We had
dinner late at night, and we
continued to drink red wine.
AS TOLD TO JESSIE KISSINGER
THE ORAL HISTORY OF
WE DECIDEDTOCOME
CLOSE TOTHE WINDOWS.
THATWASOURMISTAKE
The largest known fragment of
the meteorite made a six-metre
hole in the ice on Lake Chebarkul
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 0 1
What struck me most was
when we went into the Sistine
Chapel. You hear that metal
latch shut all of a sudden its
simply silent. In front of you, you
have a page with the names of
all the cardinals, and then you
have these two little ballots and
a store-bought, inexpensive
ballpoint pen. When I got back,
my staf said to me, You voted
for the pope with this?
There is no campaigning.
No nominations. For a while,
we just pray. At a certain point,
the senior cardinal gets up
holding his ballot, and thats an
indication the rest of us should
write a name on our ballots. Each
of us holds this folded piece of
paper, and we walk down the
length of the Sistine Chapel
with the ballot held in the air for
everyone to see. Youre standing
in front of Michelangelos Last
Judgment and you say out loud,
in Latin, that before God, who
will judge you, you are voting
for the person you think is best
qualified. It really is a moment of
Gods grace. Six cardinals look at
each ballot, say the name, pass
it around, and confirm. Every
one of us keeps score on a tally
sheet. If no one is elected, we
start all over again. But not until
theyve collected everything
the ballots and every piece
of paper in front of you. Your
tally sheet, the names of the
cardinals, everything. It all goes
into the little furnace. Theres still
no talking. No discussion. You
just start all over again. Theres
nothing moving you except what
youve just seen. Theres no one
speaking to you except the voice
in your heart. It was very, very
powerful. I just concentrated on
saying to myself, Are you getting
this right? I figured the Lord
would confirm if I did.
AS TOLD TO ELI ZABETH SI LE
MARCH 1 2 TO 1 3
THE PAPAL CONCLAVE
CARDINAL DONALDWUERL,
ARCHBISHOP OF
WASHINGTON
APRI L 24, 9 A . M.
BUILDINGCOLLAPSE, DHAKA
ASMA, FACTORY WORKER, BANGLADESH
We knewthat Rana Plaza was dangerous
before we went to work. The day before,
we had been evacuated because engineers
found a big crack in the wall. I was scared
but I treated that morning like any other:
I had a shower and a breakfast of rice with
my husband. On the way out I sawmy next
door neighbour. I dont knowwhat fate has
written for me today, I said. Dont worry,
she replied. Allah will look after you.
The weather was good and the sun was
shining. No-one wanted to go inside the
building but they forced us in. I told my
friend that I didnt knowwhat would be in
store for us. It didnt take long to find out.
I worked up on the seventh floor. I had
only finished a little bit of work before the
power suddenly switched off at 8.45am.
They turned the back-up generator on.
Within five minutes there was a huge jolt
and I began to run. I couldnt even move
four steps. I heard massive thuds and
crashing sounds then the whole building
fell down around us.
I dont really knowhowI got out. There
were six of us trapped among the rubble,
crawling slowly in the darkness. I felt like
I was inside a grave: there was so much
darkness, smoke and heat. I thought that Id
never see my parents again and was praying
to Allah to give me a newlife. None of us had
drunk any water that morning and we were
scared wed be trapped and die of thirst.
After two hours we spotted a tiny hole
using the light frommy friends phone.
Slowly we crawled out of it and then some
rescue workers found us and took us for
care. I dont knowwhat I was thinking in
that moment we escaped. I was so relieved.
I expressed my gratitude to Allah for saving
me and giving me that newlife I asked for,
because lots of others inside Rana didnt get
their second chance. Somehowmy husband
found me in hospital. God only knows how
he did that, there were so many of us.
Soon, though, I began to feel angry. To
me, the victims at Rana Plaza were killed
wilfully. The general manager had told the
company owner, Mr Rana, that it wasnt
safe. He said, No problem, get theminside.
They didnt think about us, only thought
about money.
I couldnt work for a long time. But we
are poor and I have a sick father so I had to
go back to garment work. But Imso scared.
Even when Imgoing up the stairs I feel
like the building is shaking and about to
collapse. I thank Allah for the life he gave
me. But Imangry for those who suffered
that day. I was lucky as I only suffered cut
lips, bruised legs and a sore head. There
were so many girls who lost legs, arms
and hands. Rana will never be able to give
themback. And the hundreds who died so
unnaturally. Thats no way to die.
AS TOLD TO SEAN WI LLI AMS
I FELT LIKE I WAS INSIDE A GRAVE: THERE
WASSOMUCHDARKNESS, SMOKEANDHEAT
YOUVOTED
FOR THE POPE
WITHTHIS?
P
H
O
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O
S
:
G
E
T
T
Y
I
M
A
G
E
S
1 0 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
It was the first time Id ever been to Westgate. I went to have
lunch with a woman Id been trying to meet since Id arrived in
Nairobi fromDCin July, since we did similar development work.
I got there first, and since it was warmand sunny, I walked out
onto the terrace to wait. I picked a high table. When she joined
me, she suggested that we move to a table with lower, more
comfortable seats. That was probably the first time she saved my
life that day.
We were chatting when we heard a big explosion, followed by
machine-gun fire. My natural reaction was to run, but the woman
I was with pulled me to the ground. I turned to grab my purse
and saw the man who had taken our original seats, at the high
table, lying on the ground. There was blood everywhere, and he
wasnt moving.
Asecond explosion occurred. Dust was everywhere. People
were screaming. Awoman lunged by. Alot of her leg was missing.
The activity all seemed to be outside, so we crawled into the mall
and into Mr Price, a home-goods store.
In the back of the store we sawa heavy door and assumed that
it led outside, but it ended up being a small storage room. We kept
walking down the hallway until we came to a sturdy door. It led
to a small break roomwith no exits. Some people were already
there and a fewmore joined us eighteen in all, crouched in the
corners and under tables. We thought about barricading the door,
but someone said, If its too hard to get in, maybe theyll just
shoot through the door. One of the guys in the roomworked at
Mr Price. He was a doll. When a woman had a panic attack, he got
her water and found a cloth to put on her head. Another woman
was incontinent, so he cleared out a private space in the managers
office and found a bucket for her. He actually ran across the store to
get cloth napkins, just to make sure she was comfortable.
Outside the break room we would hear questioning, gunshots,
explosions, screaming. But there would be lulls of up to twenty
minutes. I sent emails from an iPad to my father and girlfriend in
Arizona. One of my friends who works in the Senate contacted
me and said, We just heard about Westgate. Hope youre not
in there. We didnt really have an idea of what was happening.
Although we were all trying to be quiet, one woman decided to
make a phone call. When we shushed her, she put her hand on the
receiver and whispered, Well, its three oclock and the computer
SEPTEMBER 21 , 1 2: 00 P . M.
TERRORISTS ATTACKNAIROBIS WESTGATE
MALL, KILLINGAT LEAST 67 PEOPLE
BENDITAMALAKIA, SURVIVOR
guy is supposed to be at my house at four. Im not going to
be there!
After five and a half hours, an explosion shook the break
room. Then we heard Kenyan and American voices yell for
all of us to stand up and put our hands on our heads and walk
slowly in a line. Some of the men had bulletproof vests on.
Some had guns. People started shaking and crying, because
we were pretty sure that we were being rescued. But as we
approached the doors, there was gunfire everywhere, so we
ran back to the break room. The rescuers came after us and
said, Look, we knowthis isnt ideal, but if we dont get you
out now, you might never get out. So we went back outside.
That was when I think I sawone of the terrorists. He was in
jeans and holding a gun, with a white cloth over his face. We
ran and crouched against the stores. The store worker from
Mr Price was right behind me, and as he was about to leave,
he said, The woman whose leg was hurt I have to go back
to get her! He never came back out.
Outside, we were told to stay as close to the building
as possible because there were gunmen on the roof. We ran
out and found a security guy for the organisation my friend
worked for. I tried calling my dad and my girlfriend and my
ex-girlfriend on his phone, but I couldnt get through to
anyone. Then my mum picked up and I said, Hi, Mummy.
Im out, and I broke down in the street.
We walked up the street and what sounded like
grenades went off fifteen feet away from us. We fell down
and started crying. Apparently the police were trying to
keep the crowds back with tear gas. We jumped into an
empty ambulance for shelter, but it didnt help. Our eyes
were watering and we couldnt breathe. Soon after, we
finally got a ride back to my apartment building. We limped
in, in a bloody, dirty mess, with no shoes. It wasnt until I
locked the door that I finally felt safe.
AS TOLD TO ANNA PEELE
AWOMANLUNGEDBY. ALOT
OF HERLEGWASMISSING.
T
H
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TALKS
SECOND
HISTORIES
SECRETARY OF STATE JOHN
F. KERRY NOT BEINGTAKEN
INBY ANIRANIANEFFORT
TOBUY TIME TOBUILDA
NUCLEAR WEAPON.
Wearenotblind,
andIdontthink
werestupid.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 0 3
I was sitting in the window
seat in the exit row, just
behind the right wing. I
remember watching the
window, thinking, Jeez, were
very low, very soon. But then I
thought, This guy knows what
hes doing. Maybe a fraction
of a second later, I feel the
engine roaring. Walls of water
were splashing up higher than
the windows. We were so
close to the water, I honestly
felt like were about to water-
land. That went on for a few
seconds before the plane
started regaining momentum
and started flying back up
and tilting towards the left.
Then we hit something. I
knew it was the sea wall of
the runway. It was so violent.
No one had any idea the tail
of the plane had flown of,
because everyone was
facing forward.
The plane was still in an
upward motion facing to
J ULY 6, 201 3, 1 1 : 30 A . M.
ASIANAAIRLINES
FLIGHT 214CRASHES
BENJAMINLEVY, PASSENGER
NOONE HADANY IDEA THE TAIL OF
THE PLANE HADFLOWNOFF.
THE BIRTHOF
THE BRITISH
ROYAL BABY
TERRY HUTT, 78,
JULY 22, 4:24 P.M.
SECOND HISTORIES
Iwaited
outsidethe
hospital for
thirteendays.
Well, Idid
gohometo
haveabath,
sotwelve
days. Islept
onabench
underthe
headingof
thehospital.
the left, and everybodys
screaming. My first thought
is that this planes gonna go
back up, turn around, and
do another landing. Then I
thought the plane was gonna
continue flipping and land
upside down on its head on
the runway; then were all
dead. I thought of my family
and my kids. The next thing I
knew, we got slammed back
really hard on the ground. The
left wing caught the ground
and then slammed us back
on to the ground violently.
Thats when people hit their
heads, when ribs got crushed,
backbones got broken, knees
hit the front seats you name
it. Everything was shaking.
Things were flying out of the
overhead compartments in the
cabin. Dust was filling in. Then
we stopped. There was not
a noise in the plane. It was a
hairy feeling.
The chairs, which were
still strapped and bolted on
the ground, were tilted to the
left, and the back of my chair
was reclining almost onto the
other chairs behind me. I felt
like I was facing up, like in a
rocket launcher. I was covered
in blood. My ribs were really
hurting. Every time I moved, I
felt and heard cracks. The guy
next to me, he was bleeding
from the head. I unbuckled
my seat belt and grabbed the
exit door. I thought the door
would be super-heavy, but
actually it felt like feathers.
I had so much adrenaline in
my body. When I opened the
door, I saw an engine burning
with some smoke. There was
debris right underneath the
door that people could step
on to get to the ground. I
stood by the door and started
to usher and scream at
people: Get out! Move! Go,
go, go, go! I had the feeling
that if I could keep people
calm, it would go faster. There
was no aisle to walk through.
You had to walk over chairs to
get out. Black smoke started
to come in the front from
underneath the engine. When
I left the plane, there were
probably just five or six people
still on it, maybe a few more.
I think about fifty people
got through my door. We
made it out of that plane and
over three hundred people
survived by going through the
emergency exits. Everything
felt like it was moving in slow
motion, but the truth is it was
only five minutes at most
before everybody was out of
the plane.
AS TOLD TO ELI ZABETH SI LE
1 0 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
TORONTO
MAYOR
ROB FORD
ALLEGEDLY
SMOKING
CRACK
KEVINDONOVAN,
TORONTOSTAR
INVESTIGATIONS
EDITOR ANDSENIOR
REPORTER WHOBROKE
THE STORY, MAY 16
Thevideowaswell
lit. MayorFordis
sittingonachairand
theresalittletableto
hisleft. Thereislight
streaminginfrom
awindow. Hewas
prettyoutofit. Idont
surprisethateasily,
butIwaspretty
surprisedtoseethis.
Hesholdingaglass
pipeandhesinhaling.
Now, wehaveneversaidthathe
wassmokingcrack, becauseforall
Iknowitwassomethingelse. But
hewasincoherent, rambling, and
actingthewayweheardheactedat
otherevents, likeheshigh. Imean,
like, reallyhigh.
AUGUST 1 4, 6: 30 A . M.
EGYPTS RABAA
MASSACRE
MOHAMMEDELHORISHY,
SUPPORTER OF MOHAMEDMORSI
I WAS ASSIGNEDTODUNKTHE
TEAR-GAS CANISTERS INWATER
TOEXTINGUISHTHEM.
to extinguish them, but I was
wearing glasses, so my goggles
didnt fit correctly. Instead, I
helped carry the wounded to the
field hospital. I was afraid, but I
believe the day I am supposed
to die, I will die. I knew that if we
gave up the cause we believe in,
nobody would take it up later.
We started to chant Allahu
akbar to raise our spirits. As the
police entered the square, they
spoke on loudspeakers to say
they were clearing the square
under acceptable human-rights
standards. But they were already
shooting. Tear-gas canisters were
falling everywhere. When you
take even a small smell, you can
feel your chest closing. It is as if
there were needles in your face.
Your eyes are inflamed. You blink
like crazy. It still bothers me, even
though Ive been gassed about
fifty times.
We could see bulldozers
coming through the main gate,
so we started tearing up the
The sit-in was getting
bigger thousands of people,
and the mass uncertainty was
having a negative impact on
the economy. The government
wanted us out. We would switch
the nights that we stayed in the
square. I had been away for two
days, but the night before the
massacre I felt that something
was going to happen. We saw
thousands of soldiers on the
roads. We heard that police
oficers had told the people who
lived around Rabaa to leave their
houses because they wouldnt
want to see what happened.
I prayed dawn prayers
around 3:30A.M. My bed was
just a thin carpet rolled out
over the asphalt, and my pillow
was my backpack. I wrestled
with a neighbourhood friend
for a spot next to an outlet so
I could charge my BlackBerry.
He was eighteen years old.
Within hours, he would be
dead. The fifty-five-year-old
man beside him, a friend of my
fathers, was also killed.
At 6:30, I woke up to people
shouting, Theyre coming!
Theyre coming! At 6:35, the riot
police threw the first tear-gas
bomb. I was assigned to dunk
the tear-gas canisters in water
SECOND HISTORIES
T
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1 0 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
The last time I sawhim?
It was about a month before the
marathon. The morning of the bombing,
I was actually sleeping at my boy Dereks
house. We woke up, turned on the news.
And then we heard that a bomb, or two,
two bombs, went off. And I was just like,
Yo, whoever did this is like the most
evilLike, why would you even, like, what!
Like, thats evil as f***. And then two days
later they put up the pictures. And then I
get a call from a friend, and hes like, Yo,
doesnt that dude look like Jahar? And Im
like, Yo, what are you saying? What are you
even trying to say? One, it didnt look like
him. It didnt. It was a blurry picture.
I was like, Okay, this doesnt look like him.
I dont know what youre trying to say.
And then in the morning, the names
came out. I was just like, Yo, theres just
no f***ing way this is actually happening.
Nothing I could do or say could put the
event that had occurred and the person
I knew together. I couldnt do it. Even
when the chase was going down. When it
really hit me was when they said, Body
found in boat. When they said, Body
found, I was like, Alright, my friend just
died. I literally thought he died. I thought
he was dead.
Was I relieved when I learned he was
still alive? No. I cant describe what I felt.
Not in words.
AS TOLD TO LUKE DITTRICH
APRI L 1 5, 2: 50 P . M.
BOSTONMARATHONBOMBING
YOUSSEF EDDAFALI, FRIENDOF DZHOKHAR
JAHAR TSARNAEV
YO, DOESNT THAT
DUDE LOOKLIKE JAHAR?
ground, using rocks to break up
other rocks and throwing them.
People were breaking down tents
in order to make anything that
would block their path. This kept
repeating. Some would go to the
front and others would go back to
rest. The gunfire and tear gas and
alarms never stopped.
Then a group of maybe five
hundred protesters entered the
square. We dont know how they
were able to get in, because the
whole square was surrounded.
You cannot imagine the amount of
cheering and happiness. Shortly
after, a group of foreign journalists
came, and we cheered again
no Egyptian media was there
to show our story to the world.
Throughout, there were sniper
shots. Anyone with a camera was
gone. In the middle of Rabaa,
someone could be beside you,
then he would be just gone.
I turned to see people carrying
a friend of mine who had been
shot in the chest. I ran to him and
we tried to find an exit. As we ran
to the field hospital, the gunfire
was constant and the police
played high-pitched alarms to
break our nerves. They were firing
bullets heavily in the street so that
no one could enter or exit the
hospital. We ran across anyway.
The hospital smelled like tear gas
and vinegar, and we were turned
away because all four floors were
full of the dead or wounded. We
had to cross the fire line again to
get to a hospital outside Rabaa.
A man with a motorcycle took us
to my injured friends car, then I
drove while he put pressure on my
friends wound. My friend is fine
now, but he lost about two litres of
blood. As we drove, he told us to
calm down. And though his whole
face was yellow, he said things
like May God accept what we are
doing. We will continue. We are
not afraid.
We went to a hospital about
twenty kilometres outside of
Rabaa, but I kept hearing the
sounds people screaming,
bullets, chants, the alarms, and
the tear gas. They were in my
head for days afterwards. Many
people from the sit-in were
there. We were so weak, the staf
insisted that we drink juice so that
we had the strength to stand.
After a final assault, the police
captured the field hospital. There
have been many massacres in
Egypt, but this violence was
on a scale that the country had
never seen in modern history.
The oficial death toll was around
seven hundred. When youre
talking about oficial numbers,
however, you can multiply this by
two to three.
AS TOLD TO JAHD KAHLI L
Caption in here if
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if not
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SECOND
HISTORIES
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1 0 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 0 9
SHADOWS
PALESTINIAN MULTIMEDIA
ARTIST KHALED JARRAR
IS USING HIS STRUGGLE
AGAINST THE WALL THAT
SEPARATES HIS PEOPLE AND
THEIR LANDS AS A SOURCE OF
INSPIRATION. IN DOING SO HE
IS CONFRONTING BOTH HIS
OWN SUBCONSCIOUS AND THE
POLITICS OF OPPRESSION.
K
HALED JARRARS VIEW fromhis studio in Bir
Nabala in the Occupied Palestinian West
Bank is rather depressing. It faces the
eight-metre-tall concrete wall erected by
Israel in 2004, part of a 440 kilometre-
long barrier that runs near the 1949
Armistice line, or Green Line, between
Israel and the Palestinian West Bank but often diverges to
include several Israeli settlements to the Palestinian side.
This contested edifice, which will eventually be
800-kilometres long, is known to the Israelis as the Security
Fence and to the Palestinians as the Apartheid Wall. To Jarrer
is has become an unlikely muse. For the past year, he has
secretly gone to chisel concrete fromit, which he uses to make
sports objects such as footballs, basketballs, football shoes and
rackets. These casts symbolise the detritus left by children
who play under its shadow. By repurposing the material, Jarrar
says he seeks to provoke a dialogue about possession and
reclamation of space.
OUT FROM
THE
BY J ANNE LOUI SE ANDERSON
A SECRET TUNNEL
DISCOVERED IN
THE WEST BANK
CITY OF HEBRON.
1 1 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Jarrers latest object is a heavy olive tree trunk that he found
by the wall and partly covered in concrete. Before flying to the
Jakarta Biennial in November this year, the tree had to be shipped
off to Galerie Guy Brtschi in Geneva, so he and his assistant Luay
Jaber built a container for it. Unintentionally it ended up looking
like a coffin. For a dead tree, killed by the Israeli military, by their
bulldozers, he announced as he hammered in the last nail.
Jarrar hopes the box will avoid the scrutiny of Israeli security
forces. One of his concrete footballs has been stuck for several
months, first at Istanbul Airport, where it was denied entry, then
kicked back to Ben Gurion Airport, where Israeli security is
denying its right of return a stateless football, ironically.
Thankfully not all customs departments are so unforgiving and
Jarrars objects have travelled widely in recent months. They were
on display at Art Abu Dhabi in November and have also travelled in
2013 to the Contemporary Art Museumat the University of South
Florida, and before that to the Thessaloniki Biennale in Greece and
Londons AyyamGallery. At the latter show, the highlight was an
imposing concrete wall that ran throughout the gallery. In order to
pass to the other side, visitors had to climb through a hole shaped
like historical Palestine just like thousands of Palestinians who
trespass the barrier every week. Its a phenomenon that Jarrar is all
too aware of.
T
HE FIRST TIME I MET KHALED JARRAR,
his shoes were soaked and he was clearly
agitated. He had spent four hours in a
sewage tunnel filming people passing from
Ramallah to the Old City of Jerusalem,
headed to pray at the Al-Aqsa Mosque.
It was a Friday during Ramadan in 2009,
and I was on my way to Jerusalem
above ground using the main Qalandia
checkpoint. (Palestinians fromthe West
Bank can only enter Jerusalemwith a
permit fromIsrael.) Jarrar described to
me what he had just seen men, women
and children staggering through a
110-metre-long dark tunnel led by paid
guides. Some had been warned about
the green slimy sewage water and were
wearing plastic around their shoes;
others just had to stick it out until they
reached the end of the tunnel and could
crawl up through a tiny passage
between the rocks and set their feet in
East Jerusalem.
This was Jarrars first attempt
to document the many attempts by
Palestinians to slip through the wall
without permits, and it turned into the
filmInfiltrators. In the narrative, he
accompanies wall scouts who search
for passages through or over the wall.
He witnesses scores of workers who
climb and jump the wall, sometimes
to be caught and arrested by the Israeli
military. He follows an old mother to
a crack in the wall where she can
touch the fingers of her daughter
and see pictures of her grandchildren.
The filmwon two awards at the Dubai
International FilmFestival 2012 and has
since been being screened at filmfestivals and in cinemas
across the world.
S
NEAKING INTO ISRAEL without a
permit inspires many emotions.
Jarrar is familiar with these
sensations of adrenaline and
anxiety. After finishing high school
in Jenin, located in the north of the
West Bank, he was desperate to
study art but there was not enough money to grant his
wish. So he found a carpentry job in Nazareth, in the north
of Israel, where he snuck across without a permit and
worked illegally until he got caught by the police.
His interest in art had begun even earlier, sculpting wood
as a child, but his passion for the subject was repressed by
the occupation and the two Intifadas Uprisings of 1987
and 2000. I grewup as a fighter against the occupation that
stole our childhood and freedom, he says, explaining that
his school was closed during the first Intifada and that art
was not a priority for the teachers who continued to deliver
lessons in private houses.
Later on, Jarrar decided to apply for the police force,
which in turn would sponsor his studies. But during an
inspection shortly after joining in 1997, the commander
spotted Jarrar among the police officers. What are you
doing here? he asked, as he prodded the biceps and sturdy
chest of the twenty-five year-old. Impressed with Jarrars
physique, the would-be artist was immediately upgraded to
Yasser Arafats presidential guard. He would remain with
themas a soldier until 2007, and is still with the army as
ABOVE: THE BATTALION. BELOW: THE WALL AS SEEN THROUGH A GAP FROM THE
PALESTINIAN VILLAGE OF BEIT JALA
1 1 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
a photographer. Yet today he regards the
commanders perception of himmerely as
a piece of meat. They consume soldiers
as if they were producing bottles, he says
bitterly of his experience.
Wanting to spark a debate about the
manufacturing of soldiers, Jarrar created
The Battalion, which was exhibited at Guy
Brtschi Gallery in Geneva in March and
April this year. It consists of prints on pink
material of 540 soldiers, all of themthe
same picture of Jarrar. Its not me, Khaled,
its just a number, he explains about the
armys perception of its men.
Using the colour pink was also a
deliberate swipe at military convention.
Its regarded as feminine and its the
enemy of the army, he explains. But pink
is full of energy and warmth. It represents
whats going on, on the inside.
OR YEARS, Jarrar
was unable to recall
any of his dreams.
As he discovered
with a therapist,
it was a self-
defence mechanismto protect himfrom
remembering. Jarrar was defending Yasser Arafats al Muqataa
compound, which the Israelis invaded in 2005, following the
outbreak of the Second Intifada and a string of Palestinian suicide
bombings. Confronting those traumas led to nightmares based on
those locked away memories. Jarrar would wake up shaking and
covered in sweat. But, following advice fromhis therapist, he began
keeping a pen and paper by his bedside, to scribble down what his
subconscious had just dredged up...
Boom! Another bomb hit the remains of our compound. The
invasion has been going for a week now and I havent taken my boots
off once since then and hardly slept.
A scream, then blood sprays from the neck of my friend. I try to get
to him but suddenly my legs disappear from under me. I look down.
Blood is pouring from a big open wound in my right leg.
Red Cross volunteers insist on taking me to the hospital. They
carry me out right into the arms of the Israeli army! They are
gonna eat me alive.
Wheres your weapon!? a soldier screams to me.
I want a doctor, Im injured!
Shut up, f *** your whole family! another soldier screams.
Four soldiers pick me up and carry me, escorted by another four
armed guards.
What the f ***, this son of a bitch weighs 200 pounds! one of
them complains.
Which one will it be that shoots me?
They put me on the ground in the rain next to a tank.
Okay thats how Ill die, they will run over me.
An Israeli doctor comes to check on me, but he leaves instead.
You shot at our soldiers!" he shouts and hurries off.
Finally I am lifted into an Israeli ambulance. On my left I see
dozens of Palestinian nurses and doctors who have been arrested
and are kneeling blindfolded and handcuffed. After a bumpy drive,
I am dumped on the street in the pouring rain. I wait again. Finally
a Palestinian ambulance comes and takes me to the hospital.
I needed five blood transfusions and they found thirty
pieces fromthe bullet inside my leg, he recalls. Today he
still has twenty-two pieces that are too small to be removed.
Two years later, Jarrar created his first artwork At the
Checkpoint, a collection of photos taken at border crossings
and exhibited at Huwwara Checkpoint. I was so angry at
the occupation and howthese places harass the people,
he recalls. But along with the anger, he sawthat the artistic
process could be a meditatative process that could heal his
soul fromthe traumas of army life. Wanting to pass that on
to the newgenerations, he is nowbuilding a newstudio and
art space where he wants to teach children art, painting,
sculpture and conceptual photography. Its an opportunity
that he never had to express creative impulses and pursue a
passion for art.
F
AME CAN BE A BLESSING and a
curse. With Whole in the Wall and
Infiltrators, Khaled Jarrar has
attracted international media
coverage. His work is also being
noticed by curators, festivals and
galleries, and he is proud of the
recognition this brings to his society. That also brings
with it high expectations of what he will do next, which at
times has been overwhelming. Its a lot of pressure.
Everyone is constantly asking me what my next project is.
Khallas, nowI amfinished with concrete.
The attention has brought with it other unforeseen
developments. When he returned to the West Bank from
London, Israeli security knewwho he was and detained
himfor questioning at the border crossing fromJordan. But
instead of feeling intimidated, Jarrar said it made himfeel
good. Because I see howmy art became noticed by them.
I'mdoing the right thing and Imwinning with art.
PALESTINIAN PROTESTERS CLIMB THE ISRAELI SEPARATION WALL IN RAMALLAH, WEST
BANK ON AUGUST 26. BELOW: KHALED JARRAR WITH HIS CONCRETE FOOTBALLS AND AT
WORK IN HIS STUDIO.
F
3-year warranty I Swiss Made I 41 mm I Water resistant to 100 meters I Scratch-
rasistart, trij|a-tuataJ arti-rafattiva sajj|ira trsta| | kaf. 211h18 |
FROM A 1/100TH OF A SECOND CHRONOGRAPH TO A PERPETUAL CALENDAR
1 1 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
J AMES MARSDEN: A- LI ST LOOKS
AND GROWI NG RESUME OF STAND- OUT ROLES.
I S HE ONE BLOCKBUSTER AWAY
FROM GOI NG SUPERNOVA
OR I S HE ALREADY EXACTLY
WHERE HE WANTS TO BE?
ITSREALLY
NOTTHAT
HARDTO
FLYUNDER
THERADAR
WORDS AND STYLING BY KATE HAZELL
PHOTOGRAPHY BY JOHN RUSSO
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 1 5
MR MARSDEN WEARS:
TIE, DHS590, YVES SAINT LAURENT
AT SAKS FIFTH AVENUE DUBAI; SHIRT,
DHS1,874, AND TUXEDOJACKET (PART
OF SUIT), DHS14,360, BOTH TOMFORD.
CARRERA CALIBRE 1887 CHRONOGRAPH
STEEL AND GOLD (18K 3N) 41MMWATCH,
DHS20,000, TAGHEUER.
MR MARSDEN WEARS:
NOTCH LAPEL SUIT, DHS8,595,
KNIT JUMPER, DHS2,250 AND
SHOES, DHS3,795, ALL
BURBERRY PRORSUM.
1 1 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
STILL NOT
CONVINCED?
Okay: men, he was the sunglasses-wearing
Cyclops in the X-Men series and the
entrepreneurial buffoon Criss Chros, Liz
Lemons love-interest in 30 Rock. Women:
he was the smarmy all-singing-and-dancing
Corny Collins in Hairspray, as well as the
smooth-talking Kevin, Katherine Heigls
gorgeous love interest in rom-com, 27
Dresses. Under 15 or have kids? Then youll
probably knowhimas Prince Edward, the
unlucky in love royal that lost out to Patrick
Dempsey in the modern-day Cinderella
Enchanted, or Fred OHare in the kids Easter
flick, Hop. This October, he nailed JFKs
accent and mannerisms, starring as president
in Lee Daniels The Butler, which is stirring up
some just-as-convincing Oscar buzz.
Marsden, as the above list testifies,
has played a variety of contrasting roles
throughout his twenty-year career, and
has appeared in front of millions of cinema
goers. Yet hes still baffled as to why, five
minutes into our photoshoot, at West
Hollywoods Andaz Hotel, hes recognised
by an excited forty-something woman. It
always throws me, when people come up to
me. I mean, I really dont think that many
people knowwho I am, he says without a
hint of sarcasm. I got a little bit obsessed with
running a couple of years back and kept on
signing up for these five and 10k runs every
weekend. Id be huffing and puffing my
way around and people would be like Hey, its you!
As much as the forty-year-old Marsden or Jimmy as all his friends call him is in
denial, hes going to have to start accepting the force of fame. Anchorman 2: The Legend
Continues is released this month and hes playing Ron Burgundys arch rival in one of the
most eagerly anticipated comedies of the past fewyears. Its prequel, Anchorman: The
Legend of Rob Burgundy, released in 2004, has become a cult classic, following the story
of Will Ferrells TVnews teamand starring Steve Carell, Paul Rudd, David Koechner and
Christina Applegate.
Imthe hugest Will Ferrell and Anchorman fan, admits Marsden, who originally
auditioned for Paul Rudds character the first time round, just missing out at the last
hurdle. Its rare to be a part of a filmthat youre such a big fan of. I mean anyone stepping
into that environment would undoubtedly be thrilled yet s****ing themselves.
Marsden spent two months over the summer in Atlanta filming the follow-up, the cast
of which reads like a whos who in comedy, as Kristen Wiig, Sacha Baron Cohen, Vince
Vaughn and Nicole Kidman join the original team. I was filming with some of the biggest
comedians around, and it could have easily turned into a p***ing contest with everyone
trying to have the biggest joke and get the biggest laugh, he says. But Ive never worked
with such generous actors who are so welcoming of talent. In their improvs, theyd
literally set you up for the joke and let you be the brilliant one. The hardest part was trying
to keep it together and not laugh, because you dont want to be that guy who laughs and
sinks a moment of brilliance.
And with six movies released this year alone, it seems Marsdens on a roll. His
versatility undoubtedly helps. While hes comfortable starring alongside and talking to a
tiny CGI bunny (that would be Hop), hes also just as convincing when violently burning
James Woods face off, in 2011s remake of SamPeckinpahs teeth-clenching StrawDogs
two movies that came out within months of each other.
IT DOESNT REALLY MATTER
WHAT KINDOF MOVIES YOURE
INTOOR HOWOLDYOUARE,
YOUWILL KNOWWHOJAMES
MARSDENIS. ANDTHATS
EVENIF THE NAME DOESNT
IMMEDIATELY CONJURE A FACE,
THOUGHHE HIMSELF WILL
DISPUTE THIS ARGUMENT.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 1 7
BORNINSTILLWATER, Oklahoma, Marsden
was brought up, along with his two brothers and two sisters, by his father, a meat and
poultry inspector, and his mother, a nutritionist. While his boyish good looks got hima
fewmodelling roles, including a stint with Versace, he had other career paths in mind.
He studied broadcast journalismat Oklahoma State University, before deciding that
he wanted to try his hand in front of the camera, instead of behind it. So he made the
twenty-one-hour drive to Hollywood and worked his way through a number of Nineties
sitcoms such as Saved by the Bell, The Nanny, Blossomand Party of Five. The TVwork
eventually paid off when he landed a lead part alongside Katie Holmes, fresh off of her
success fromDawsons Creek, in the 1998 movie thriller Disturbing Behaviour. But it was
his role as Cyclops in 2000s X-Men, that really gave Marsden a future in Hollywood.
X-Men was the filmthat most people sawme in and its still a project that Imvery
proud of and very grateful to be a part of, he explains to me, sitting on a sofa in the hotels
conference roomafter our shoot, where we can avoid the stares and excitable pointing.
That being said, the role didnt require me to do much, I just had to stand there with
glasses on and there wasnt that much depth to the character, or at least my portrayal of
that character, and so I guess coming on to the scene as that guy he trails off, searching
for a sentence that wont make himseemtoo over-confident or cocky.
The pretty boy? I suggest a little hesitantly,
hoping he wont take it the wrong way. He laughs.
I guess when you set the bar at that level then you
can surprise people with what you can do. You get
more credit than you deserve actually because the
expectations arent so high.
While his looks are enough to make most
women blush (literally; I sawit happen), its
hard to get a supercilious comment out of his
mouth. Despite the escalating career, Marsden is
as humble as the Levis and plain grey V-neck he
turns up in. Were shooting in the hotel (formerly
known as the Continental Hyatt and then Hyatt
West Hollywood) thats famous for its rock and
roll shenanigans. Keith Richards and Keith Moon
dropped TVs out of the windowin the late 1970s,
John Bonhamis said to have rode his motorbike
along the hallways and Little Richard lived here
on and off during the 1980s and 90s. But today the
windows are bolted shut and the corridors are
quiet, and that suits Marsden just fine. In fact, hes
almost painfully self-depreciating.
Maybe its because his reality isnt quite as rosy
as his cheeks. His eleven-year marriage to actress
Lisa Linde broke down in 2011, and in December
last year Brazilian model Rose Costa gave birth
to Marsdens son William, following a brief fling
with the actor. While all this is rather boring by
Hollywoods standards, you get the sense that the small town boy fromOklahoma is still
very much a part of Marsdens existence. The only paparazzi pictures I can find are of
himwalking his white retriever with Williamstrapped to his chest, taking his kids from
his first marriage, twelve-year-old Jack and eight-year-old Mary James, to the Farmers
Market, or participating in a bi-annual triathlon which he does twice a year to raise money
for the Childrens Hospital Los Angeles.
Its really not that hard to fly under the radar, I mean just look at Matt Damon,
he simply replies when I ask about his lack of tabloid column inches. Ive always really
admired Matts work and if I had to emulate someones career or look up to someone,
it would be him. The guy just seems like he loves what hes doing, does it, and then goes
home. It doesnt have to be more complicated than that.
Not taking himself too seriously also means that he is a pleasure to be around. Fromthe
beginning of our shoot, Marsden quickly slips into a British accent, warmly mocking my
own, and takes it upon himself to teach our Australian make-up artist the art of cockney-
rhyming slang. If youre being a dick, youre obviously not having fun, he reasons at one
point. While dealing with Hollywood egos and dragoness publicists (theyre usually female
for some reason), having fun on a shoot is the exception, not the rule. Apples and pears, up
JIMMY HAS MOVEDPAST THE
LIABILITY OF HIS BEAUTY AND
DEMONSTRATEDA TALENT THAT
IS FAR BEYONDHIS LOOKS...HE
HAS A GREAT SOULFULNESS TO
HIMWHICHIS RARE WHENYOU
HAVE FEATURES LIKE THATIN
HOLLYWOOD ADAMSHANKMAN
1 1 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
MR MARSDEN WEARS:
SHIRT, DHS1,411; TUXEDOJACKET,
DHS9,829; TROUSERS, DHS3,075,
ALL DOLCE & GABBANA; TIE,
DHS450, YVES SAINT LAURENT AT
SAKS FIFTH AVENUE DUBAI.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 1 9
MR MARSDEN WEARS:
PEAKED LAPEL SUIT, DHS27,600,
AND TURTLE NECK, DHS5,650,
BOTH HRMES. MAKE-UP BY
DAVID STANWELL AT EXCLUSIVE
ARTISTS MGMT.
1 2 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
the stairs, he sings playfully in a Dick Van Dyke-esque voice while he tries to work out
if he thinks a velvet bow-tie is too poufy for his face. Theres always some element of
buffoonery to the characters Imdrawn to, he also comments between impersonations.
Ive always felt more comfortable playing a character thats flawed and I dont mean that
in an actory kind of way. Even in Anchorman, my characters a real s***.
But this lack of pretention shouldnt distract fromsome seriously good acting chops.
What Jimmys done is moved past what is so often a liability for people who are as good
looking as him, explains Hairspray director AdamShankman to me on the phone from
NewYork. He has demonstrated a talent so far beyond that.
Corny Collins was the hardest person for me to cast as he had
to be incredibly good looking, have great comedic timing yet
also an incredible voice. Jimmy just nailed it immediately,
and as a director, he was a dreamto work with. He has a great
soulfulness and humility to himwhich is rare when you have
features like that in Hollywood.
Id been meaning to work with James because I think
hes interesting hes a good actor and this is something
hes never done before, director Lee Daniels explained to
Empire of his casting Marsden as JFK. I always like to get
something out of people that we havent seen. It wasnt about
impersonating the president but finding a human side in
themthat we havent seen before. I didnt want caricatures.
For someone who could very easily have been typecast
into the handsome Hollywood leading man box, Marsden is
evolving instead into a very effective character actor, as his
varied schedule for the first half of next year, (which is brisk
to say the least) testifies. He will play alongside Elizabeth
Banks in rom-comWalk of Shame; take a leading part in the
Erik Van Looy thriller, The Loft and then star in another
comedy, Welcome To Me, with his Anchorman pals, Ferrell
and Wiig.
I feel really lucky to have avoided any kind of typecast so
far, but I guess because Ive got my kids, I feel my happiness
doesnt depend on this, he shrugs referring back to the
diversity of characters on his IMDb profile. When things
become less important, you allowyourself to open up and
you feel less danger about taking risks. Maybe thats whats
been happening over the past five or six years. Imhaving fun
doing this but my happiness isnt dependant on it. As for my future, I guess Id like to keep
feeling this way and still be an working actor when Imin my seventies or eighties.
Perhaps thats the key to Marsdens success. In a town of egos and fame chasers, hes
a small town boy who happens to be good actor and does his job without making a fuss
about it. Much like Matt Damon, in fact. And with that, he walks me down to the hotel
reception and waits for my car valet to appear, indulges in a polite conversation with a
woman who recognises himfromHairspray, and kisses me on both cheeks goodbye.
He says theres a black tie Hollywood thingy hes been invited to, but he is going to skip
it to drink beers with his mates instead.
I FEEL LUCKY TOHAVE
AVOIDEDANY TYPECAST SO
FAR, BUT I GUESS BECAUSE
IVE GOT MY KIDS, I FEEL MY
HAPPINESS DOESNT DEPEND
ONTHIS. WHENTHINGS
BECOME LESS IMPORTANT YOU
ALLOWYOURSELF TOOPENUP
AS ANACTOR.
SHOT EXCLUSIVELY AT ANDAZ HOTEL WEST HOLLYWOOD. GROOMINGBY DAVID STANWELL AT EXCLUSIVE ARTISTS MGMT.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 2 1
1 2 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
OOGLE GLASS may or may not
transformthe future. But one thing is
beyond question: it elicits mighty strong
reactions in the present.
The first week I got my tiny newface
computer, I wore it to a barbeque and sat
down at a table to eat pasta salad. That
is the most annoying thing in the world,
snapped a mumof twins, pointing at my
newgadget fromacross the table.
I disagree, I responded.
No, really. It is.
One second, I said. I tapped the black frames with my finger
to turn the device on. Okay, Glass, Google What is the most
annoying thing in the world?
In the miniscreen perched above my right eye, an article
popped up. I clicked on it. I scrolled. She waited.
All right, I have a list fromThe Daily Telegraph with the top
hundred most annoying things. Theres people who drive too close
to you. Noisy eaters. Rude clerks. No Google Glass.
She remained unconvinced. Instead she yammered on about
privacy invasion, the failure to embrace real life, the evils of
distraction, the usual.
Yet, earlier that same day, several strangers had approached me
some timid, some nearly giddy as if I were a minor celebrity,
perhaps a judge on a cable food show. Are they as awesome as
people say? Where can I get the Google Goggles? Mind if I try
themon? (For all the fears of privacy advocates, it was mostly my
privacy that was invaded.)
As with cilantro and Hillary Clinton, theres not a lot of
middle ground. Google Glass which will be released for sale
to the public sometime in 2014 has become the flash point
in the war between tech-fearing, Jonathan-Franzen-admiring,
our-kids-should-play-with-wooden-blocks types and the self-
quantifying, singularity-loving, Cloud-computing-will-save-the-
world evangelists.
After much cajoling, and my solemn pledge to get contact
lenses, Google sold me an early prototype for $1,500. I would
be one of eight thousand Explorers a group of engineers,
scientists, artists, and journalists allowed to test it out. At the Glass
office in NewYork (huge windows, free tea and sandwiches),
YOU VE HEARD
A LOT ABOUT
I T. YOU VE
READ A LOT
ABOUT I T.
BUT THI S I S
WHAT GOOGLE
GLASS I S
REALLY LI KE.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 2 3
I got a crash course on howto connect my Glass to the Internet,
take video, snap a photo, get directions, search for nearby Taco
Bells, return emails, make calls, and watch CNNall without the
daunting effort of reaching into my pocket for my smartphone.
I was also advised about what I should definitely not do.
So thats what I would do. My mission: I would push Glass to its
limits to give me a glimpse of the real-life utopia and/or dystopia
that awaits.
THE FIRST FEW DAYS are a mix of
exhilaration and frustration. One minute
Immarveling, Holy hell, this street map
moves when I turn my head! The next Im
having heated arguments with Glass voice-
recognition feature: CNN. Not Rihanna.
CNN! CNN! Thats not to mention the added challenge of
friends who sneak up behind me and shout inappropriate Google
searches to clog my browsers history. Okay, Glass, Google
NAMBLAmembership application! (The phrase Okay, Glass
is the devices required verbal ignition key.)
The tiny screen (roughly three quarters of an inch by half an
inch) takes some getting used to. For a while, I was squinting half
the day, but Ive nowlearned to adjust. You have to point your
eyeballs up and to the right, so you spend a lot of time looking as if
youre trying to do long division in your head.
Glass is designed to display short snippets of text: quick emails
such as See you at Sbarro at 10:00. Or CNNheadline updates,
like lizard suspected of eating neighbours cat
(which I was helpfully informed of at the doctors office).
As the Google publicist told me, Glass is not meant for poring
over two-thousand-word articles.
Yet whats the harmin trying? In fact, why not use my Glass to
read something even more substantial, like Moby-Dick? Imagine
the joy of having a tiny great work of literature in front of your face
at all times.
As my wife drives the family to our friends house in Connecticut,
I ride shotgun, tilt my head back, and dive into some nineteenth-
century fiction. Okay, Glass, Google Moby-Dick full text, I say.
I find a free file fromPrinceton University. The problem? The
sentences dont fit on the screen. If I want to finish a line, I have
to turn my head to the right, then shift it back to the left. I look like
LITERATURE
OPERATI ON:
a spectator at Wimbledon or a five-year-old throwing a
tantrum. Imalso car-sick.
Can you stop? my wife asks. Its very distracting.
After a half-hour break, I try again. I find another version of
Moby-Dick that fits on the screen.
I start to read. Its both strange and wonderful. The words
float against the sky above the Saw Mill River Parkway. The text
is so close to my eyes, the book feels like its inside my brain. Im
in my own secret world, like the kid with the flashlight under the
blanket, but without the flashlight or blanket.
Ive never read Moby-Dick, and the details seem so visceral
up close: Queequeg harpooning the breakfast beefsteaks from
across the table, or draping his tattooed arm over Ishmael during
a forced spooning. And who knew Melville was such a cranky
b*****, an early Louis CK, with his urge to step into the street
and start methodically knocking peoples hats off?
After forty-five minutes, I get an ice-pick headache and
have to stop. I later tell some tech-loathing book-world friends,
who react with horror as if reading on an iPad werent bad
enough. In their honour, I read a long article on my Glass
called 35 Arguments Against Google Glass, which gives me an
ironic thrill.
Literature verdict: briefly fantastic. Use caution.
1 2 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Above: 1. The author in basic training at Google in NewYork.
2. His viewthrough Glass riding shotgun on the highway
before returning to Moby-Dick. 3. Hustling his friends at poker.
4. Scanning for women at a bar.
TEXAS
HOLD EM
OPERATI ON:
ONE OF GLASS most impressive features
is that it can live-streamvideo fromyour
point of view. Anyone can see the world
through your eyes. If youre at the grocery
store facing a baffling array of tomato sauces,
just video-call your wife. On her laptop, she
can scan the shelf and tell you to get the seven-herb Robusto.
Very useful.
Also useful? Invite some friends over for poker and have
your cousin, whos a professional poker player in Vegas, secretly
observe your cards fromhis laptop and signal to you howto bet.
I have such a cousin. He agreed to the plan. Id be his poker
body, hed be my poker brain. Together wed create The Sting 2.0.
My cousin and I spend the day practicing our scheme. On his
computer, he can see my cards. On my walnut-sized screen, I can
see a teensy version of himholding up handwritten signs, like
fold. Or raise ten dollars. Or call. I keep my cousin on mute
for two reasons: firstly, I dont want my fellowcard players to hear
him. And secondly, hes kind of a cocky b******.
At 8:00p.m. on a Thursday, my three
unsuspecting friends come to my apartment. They
knowImtesting Glass, but I tell themits only for
email. Are you going to look up whether a straight
beats a flush? my friend Carl jokes. Ha, ha,
I chuckle. No, nothing like that. (Though its true
I barely knowthe rules.)
I deal. I lift my hand to showmy cousin my jack
and six. Andthe video goes black. I tap the side
of my frames furiously to reconnect. We finally
do, but ten seconds later, his image freezes mid-
scribble. Dammit!
Imstranded. This is awful. After losing a bunch of hands,
I excuse myself to go to the bathroomand phone my cousin.
We whisper-argue over who is to blame for the technical snafu.
Back at the table, we get the live stream running again.
And he holds up the fold sign three hands in a row. Ugh. This
isnt working.
And then, on an ace-ten, he has me bet ten dollars, then raise
fifteen. Its much more aggressive than my usual I guess Ill call
strategy. We win! I get a head rush.
Another hand, he writes, lets bluff. bet twenty dollars.
My friends fold. Another pot! My cousin writes, nowshowyour
cards and laugh. Too late. Ive already tossed my cards into the
mix. Wait! I say. I try to reach back into the pile. My friends give
me a puzzled look.
Its thrilling, this freedomfromchoice, the comfort of knowing
that Implaying like a master. Granted, its far froma flawless
plan. At times, my cousin cant see my hand, even though I shove
my nose right up to the cards. The video is spotty and slow(its a
prototype, after all), so I spend a lot of time stalling. Hmm.
Let me think. And, as I mentioned, my cousin has an attitude.
clean up your stack!! he writes on his whiteboard, his Sharpie
cap dangling fromhis mouth. I stack. He shakes his head.
more vertical!
At one point, my nine-year-old son joins the game. He gets a
good hand, but my cousin senses mine is better and tells me to
raise my son forty dollars, the kids life savings. I cant do it. My
cousin writes, wuss.
But overall, the plan works surprisingly well. After two hours,
Ive tripled my money to $200, at which point I confess my sin to
my friends and give themback their money.
They seemmore baffled than angry. So what are you seeing?
Hes in that little thing? The next day, one friend emails to thank
me for the night, adding, despite the fact that I woke up with a
somewhat violated feeling that I cant seemto shake.
Poker verdict: delightful. Dangerous.
DICTATION
OPERATI ON:
THREE WEEKS IN, Glass and I are getting
along better. There are still plenty of
annoyances, like accidentally tweeting a photo
of the Chipotle counter. But I love taking
video of my sons without themgetting me and
Imrolling Oh, Dad. [Correction: without
themgiving me an eye-rolling Oh, Dad.] Ive successfully
Googled the XYZ affair, flank steak against the grain, and
burrata cheese.
Imalso getting the hang of the voice-recognition feature. I find
Glass prefers in order to perform[correction: Glass prefers a more
chipper voice], like Ima tour guide at Universal theme park. Not
my favourite own [correction: tone], but I adjust.
In fact, I have dictated this entire section of the article. Perhaps
most impressive: Glass is no prude. It understands and spells out
every horrible, naughty word I can think of.
Dictation verdict: lawless [correction: flawless].
MOVIES
AND TV
OPERATI ON:
MORE THAN TWENTY-FIVE YEARS
AGO, a heavyweight boxer named Mitch
Green was arrested for allegedly driving with
a working TVmounted on the hood of his car.
Prescient.
I dont plan to drive while watching my
Glass I do enjoying living but what if I tried to watch video
every moment of the day that Imnot operating heavy machinery?
My first plan was to streama series of back-to-back epic movies
on my Glass as I ran my errands and made my calls. Unfortunately,
Glass isnt yet compatible with Netflix.
Instead, I had to settle for sixteen hours of YouTube. I watch
Ali G while at the grocery. I watch a TED talk about bipolar
disorder while scrubbing the dishes. While taking my kids to
the Museum of Natural History, I creep myself out by watching
the Blurred Lines video, squinting to make out the worlds
tiniest nipples.
Things start to spin out of control. How could they not?
Its my childhood dream come true, this ever-present TV.
My wife approaches me in the kitchen. I can see her mouth
moving. I tell her, Im watching a Richard Pryor clip about the
first black president. If its important, let me know, and Ill pause.
She walks away.
It doesnt help that Imwearing earplugs to improve the sound
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 2 5
quality and occasionally pressing the Glass temple into the bone
above my ear.
I begin trying to improve life. When Imout for a hike, I see a
waterfall. Its fine. But why not spice things up with a video of
Angel Falls in Venezuela? Now, thats spectacular. I have lunch
at Panera Bread, but why not search for video of the inside of Le
Bernardin? Sadly, I couldnt find it. But Imsure I will soon.
Imworried for reality.
Movies-and-TVverdict: incomplete. But promising.
CYRANO
OPERATI ON:
I STILL NEED TO PUT GLASS to the
ultimate test: Can it help a guy get some action?
Immarried with three kids, and my
wife has made it clear that Glass is not an
aphrodisiac for her. So I figured Id lend my
device to a single twenty-six-year-old editor at
Esquire. The plan: hell wear it to a downtown NewYork bar, and
Ill watch the live-streamvideo fromhome and tell himwhat to do.
Ill be his Cyrano. Ill get a vicarious night on the town, all while
eating my butternut-squash soup in the comfort of my home.
I cant wait.
On a Thursday night, Matt enters the bar. We approach a pack of
blonde twenty-something women fromSouth Carolina.
Imdoing an article for Esquire magazine on books women
read, he says (our prearranged line). Whats your favourite book?
I dont read books, says one blonde.
The videos not great. I can make out their faces a bit, but I mostly
see a glowing candle.
Mine is ATree Grows in Brooklyn.
On my laptop, I Google Tree Grows in Brooklyn quotes. I send
an instant message to Matts Glass. (The bar is too loud for me to
talk to him.)
The world was hers for the reading, says Matt. We are met
with a blank face. Thats fromATree Grows in Brooklyn.
Are those Google Glasses? one woman says. Can I try
them on?
Huh. Not part of the plan, but I guess so. Matt has to explain that
shell be seeing a miniature video of me, so as not to alarmher.
Hi there! the woman says.
If the Cyrano strategy isnt working, maybe I can be his virtual
wingman. Isnt Matt handsome? I message her. I think he
really likes you.
She laughs a bit nervously. Matt, thankfully, remains unaware.
Matt puts my Glass back on and we approach a woman named
Jessica cute, black dress, bangs. We ask her her birthday.
September 13.
You know, you share a birthday with Niall fromOne Direction,
Matt says, thanks to my Googling.
Who is that? she asks.
Also Tyler Perry, says Matt.
Give me someone cool.
Milton Hershey, inventor of the Hershey bar.
Yeah, hes pretty cool.
Nowwere getting somewhere. Nowwere flirting. I Google
her name and find something on a new-agey Web site. I type:
The name Jessica means you long for a stable and loving
family relationship.
Matt refuses to say my line. Jessica drifts away.
We find another woman, this one French. I ask himto tell this
woman, Youre like a parking ticket. You have fine written all
over you.
My colleague in my Glass wants me to tell you youre like a
parking ticket.
Theres lots of noise. I cant see her reaction. Glass cuts out.
To get another perspective, Matt lets his female friend who
came with himto the bar try Glass. She approaches a group of
men. They are having none of it.
Youre okay, but your friend looks like a douchebag with them
on, says the British ringleader.
I Google douchebag, hoping for a good douchebag-
related retort. But what I find is both too late and too lame.
Youre saying Ima bag of vinegar and water invented in
1766? The Brit has walked away by this time.
The single women seemmore intrigued by Glass, the
men more threatened.
Matt is flirting with one of the South Carolina women
again. She tells himher name. I find her Internet trail and
feed himinformation.
So you like Mad Men? he asks (fromher Pinterest
board). What was it like being a casting assistant?
(LinkedIn.) Tell me about the Sloppy Tuna music festival
in Montauk (a photographers Web site).
The woman is both fascinated and freaked out. She takes out
her iPhone to see where we are getting this. Her friend pulls her
away to the bathroom.
After about an hour, the video cuts out. The next day, I ask
Matt what happened the rest of the night.
Awoman lifted up her shirt and showed me her bra, he says.
What? I cut out and it goes fromCyrano to The Heff?
She wanted to see if I could get a photo. I think I did.
Trust me, he didnt. I searched the photos fromthe night for a
long time. Most were dark and blurry.
The night did make clear that Glass could have a profound
impact on dating. Imagine when hackers start releasing facial-
recognition software against Googles will: we might scan the
roomand figure out who is married, whose company had just
floated on the stock market, who got busted for shoplifting when
they were nineteen. Imagine being able to come up with retorts
worthy of Oscar Wilde because they were written by Oscar Wilde.
Cyrano verdict: date bait. But creepy. Partial success.
CONCLUSION
WILL I WEAR GLASS IN REAL LIFE?
That depends a lot on whether everyone
else wears it. Im impressed overall, but
I dont want to be one of those in Americas
small cadre of Glassholes. I need social
acceptance.
Its hard to predict whether Glass will become a mass
phenomenon. But if it doesnt, something like it will. Perhaps a
gadget that looks no more noticeable than a pair of wire-rimmed
glasses. Technology wont stop. We are all on a long, slowmarch
towards becoming half-android. Will the good outweigh the
bad? Nobody knows.
Well, thats not entirely true. Okay, Glass, Google Will Glass
be good or bad for society?
1 2 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
>>
ONE NI GHT I N 2009, on a boat fromLibya
to Lampedusa, when Hassan Ali thought he was
about to die, he looked up. Up past the men with
the AK-47s snarling down at him. Past the dead
bodies and the men who were eating them. Past the abused
women who sat, staring blankly and waiting obediently for
death. He looked past it all and straight up at the sky and
remembered when he was a boy, looking out of his bedroom
windowin Beled Hawo. He always wanted to be an astronaut,
to be up there with the stars that danced and flirted with
infinity, free of the violence and poverty in Somalia. If only he
SOME PEOPLES STORI ES BEGI N
WI TH VI OLENCE, EXTREME POVERTY
OR PERSECUTI ON. FOR HASSAN,
I T BEGAN AT AFTERNOON PRAYERS
ESQUI RE REPORT
BY SEAN WI LLI AMS
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 2 7
could escape Beled Hawo he might have a chance.
And nowhere he was, gazing into the darkness. Only nowhe
wished more than anything he could be back home. In chasing
freedomhed become chattel a slave. Hed witnessed rape,
torture and worse. And all for somewhere he knewnext to
nothing about, at the tip of a country he knewdidnt want him.
But Hassanwas one of the lucky ones. He made it to Lampedusa.
Thousands of others dont. So far this year, 13,078 illegal migrants
have arrived at the small Italian island, which, at less than eight
square miles, was hitherto known primarily as a Mediterranean
holiday destination. Most of these people are swiftly thrown
into a welcome centre, sometimes for months on end, after
which around a third are sent home.
Thats if they make it: divers are still pulling bodies out of
the sea near Lampedusa after a boat caught fire and capsized
on October 3rd. Three hundred and sixty-four Africans died.
Nine days later another thirty-eight men, women and children
perished, mostly Syrians fleeing their civil war. Since 1999 over
200,000 people are estimated to have landed in Lampedusa.
Up to 20,000 have died trying. Since the October 3rd disaster,
two men, a Somali and a Libyan, have been detained for their
role in the fateful voyage. Survivors have described horrific
DIDNT MAKE IT, AND THE THOUSANDS
TRAPPED ON A TINY ITALIAN ISLAND
OFF TUNISIA. THIS IS THE STORY OF
LAMPEDUSA, HOLIDAY PARADISE AND
UNWITTING PROTAGONIST IN EUROPES
RAGING IMMIGRATION DEBATE
Migrants stare at
the sea in Lampedusa
in October this year.
More than 400 migrants
drowned in two
disasters in that
one month
1 2 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
tales of rape and torture while struggling to stump-up enough
cash for the trip.
Ready or not, Lampedusans have found themselves on the
frontline of Europes immigration debate. Exact figures vary,
but the EUestimates the number of illegal entries to Europe
to be around a third of a million per year. Some peoples stories
begin with violence, extreme poverty or persecution.
For Hassan, it began at afternoon prayers.
HASSAN WAS ALONE. HE COULD
HEAR BULLETS FI ZZI NG PAST THE
BUI LDI NG: SOME CRACKED I NTO I TS
WHI TEWASHED WALLS
>>
BELED HAWO is a dusty border town in Somalia
at the crossroads between Somalia, Ethiopia and
Kenya. Its currently held by Ethiopia-backed militia,
but has been fought for before and won by Somalias deadly
al-Qaeda affiliate, al-Shabaab. Hassan lived in a small
apartment with his mother, father, younger sister and two
elder brothers. Neither of his parents could find regular work
and it was difficult for themto put their children through
school. But thanks to money scrabbled together fromfriends
and family living abroad, Hassan was sent to a local Islamic
school called Dugsi. His oldest memory was of almost
drowning in a local river. But far worse was to come when,
aged ten, he walked into his local mosque after school to pray.
Gunfire suddenly rang outside. Hassan was alone. He could
hear bullets fizzing past the building: some cracked into its
whitewashed walls. In a panic, he decided to get out and run,
dodging the crossfire that hissed and spat above his head. He
turned onto his home street and rapped his fists against the
front door. To his right, two men holding AK-47s sawhimand
opened fire. The front door opened. Hassan ran to his mother
and jumped into her lap. It was five hours before the fighting
eventually stopped.
Hassans childhood was not unlike those of millions of others
in Somalia, a nation broken through years of civil war and terror.
When, nine years later, he heard Somalis talk of their newlives
in Europe after undertaking something called tahrib, he was
hooked. Tahrib, it became clear, was a journey across land and
sea to Lampedusa, fromwhere hed heard a new, prosperous
life, without the constant threat of death, could be built. Hassan
had found his way out of Beled Hawo. But it would take months
more, and thousands of dollars, before he set foot on the island.
ESQUI RE REPORT
A survivor of the
October 3rd shipwreck
walks in the street of
Lampedusa
WHEN ASKED I F THE
FI NGERPRI NTI NG OF I MMI GRANTS
WAS TOO HARSH, THE MAYOR OF
TREVI SO I N NORTHERN I TALY,
GI ANCARLO GENTI LI NI , REPLI ED:
WHATS THE PROBLEM? I THI NK
WE SHOULD TAKE PRI NTS
OF THEI R FEET AND NOSES TOO.
>>
RABBI T BEACH I S CLEARLY a big hit with
travellers and its easy to see why, with its stunning
turquoise water and white sand. Thats Emma Shaw,
TripAdvisor spokeswoman, speaking this February after
Lampedusas top tourist spot was named best beach in the
world. One of the Italian Pelagie Islands, alongside Linosa and
Lampione, Lampedusa sits on a barren, isolated shard of cliffs
and picturesque bays just seventy miles fromTunisia, placing it
closer to Africa than Europe. It was once home to an ancient
Roman garum(fish sauce) factory, and was mentioned by the
Greek geographer Strabo as Lopadusa, meaning richof molluscs.
During the Middle Ages the island switched hands frequently
Pope Francis
during his visit
to Lampedusa
on July 8. He
said mass for
the migrants
and condemned
the global
indiference
to their plight
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 2 9
Immigrants are
detained after their
arrival in the Temporary
Shelter Centre
until, in 1860, the newly-formed Kingdomof Italy founded a
penal colony on its scrubby shores. Still it remained a popular
holiday destination thanks to its beaches and pretty villages.
Loggerhead turtles swimto Lampedusa each year to lay eggs.
Today the scrub is gone, replaced by an ascetic, lunar
landscape after deforestation and Allied bombing during World
War Two. But the fishermen remain, picking sardines, anchovies,
coral and sponges. And, arguably, so does the penal colony.
The welcome centre that greets the thousands of migrants
who sail to Lampedusa each year was built to counter waves of
immigration that have hit the island since the early 2000s, when
violent Islamists began to take control of Somalia. It is struggling
to cope.
A2011 fire that gutted the Centre for First Aid and Welcome
cut its capacity to 250. Over a thousand people nowcamp there
instead, in a desiccated concrete shell that locals liken to a
prison. Only recently did authorities allowmigrant children to
play in a special area for four hours each day. We had to fight
the police for it, says Save The Childrens Viviana Valastro.
The number of people nowarriving on a single boat is now
larger than the capacity of the centre, says the UNHCRs
Barbara Molinario. Last month, a group of Syrian refugees went
on hunger strike to protest their conditions at the centre.
So desperate is the situation in Lampedusa that it drewa
July visit fromPope Francis, who prayed for migrants dead
and alive. Aspeech in which Francis stressed a globalisation
of indifference appeared to take aimat Europes populist
politicians whove leapt on austerity to push increasingly
xenophobic messages. Italy is more culpable than most.
In 2002, under a coalition led by then Prime Minister Silvio
Berlusconi, the Bossi-Fini Law(named after Umberto Bossi
and Gianfranco Fini, the neo-fascist and separatist politicians
who drafted it) was introduced. Among other measures, the
lawallowed for the immediate expulsion of immigrants, arrest
and detention of up to a year, residence contingent on work
contracts, and the fingerprinting of immigrants. When asked if
the latter clause was too harsh, the mayor of Treviso in northern
Italy, Giancarlo Gentilini, replied: Whats the problem? I think
we should take prints of their feet and noses too.
Would he have thought differently had he read Hassans tale?
THE GUARDS TOLD US THAT THE
GI RLS WOULD BE TI ED UP, BEATEN
AND RAPED. WHEN, AFTER TWO
DAYS, THEY DEMANDED $300 EACH
TO LEAVE, WE FOUND OUT THEY HAD
BEEN TRUE TO THEI R WORD.
>>
ARE YOU MAD? his parents questioned. It was
2009 and Hassan was nineteen. He had just told them
he was about to set off on tahrib. I told them
everything, Hassan recalls. About howgoing on tahrib was
the only way forward for me. They told me that if I thought it
was an easy game, I should go ahead and do it. It wasnt until I
called themon the boat that I knewtheyd been joking.
Somalia is the Worlds Most Failed State, as the worlds
press continues to remind us. It is limping froma civil war that
began in 1991, and still hasnt been declared over, to desperate
poverty, the recycling of corrupt leaders, clan warfare and
rampant Islamist groups along the way. Last year a famine killed
a quarter of a million people. Al-Shabaab regularly detonates
bombs in the capital Mogadishu and a fledgling government
barely controls the turf outside its own presidential palace.
No wonder, then, that Somalia remains one of the worlds
largest contributors of migrants to Europe. Over 41,000 left the
country between January 2012 and July this year.
1 3 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Fewwould be able to escape without mukhalas, tahribs
fixers. These are shady characters who organise transit to
Europe for Somalias desperate. Usually theyre petty criminals
in a country where minor crimes goes unnoticed among bomb
blasts, mass famine and economic meltdown. The people who
leave on the boats are told by their mukhalas that Europe is the
only hope they have, says Nur Hassan, a journalist in Mogadishu.
For Hassan that hope came at a price: $1,000 at first (which
is relatively cheap: tahrib can cost up to $10,000), which he
pooled fromrelatives and friends. Hed heard on the radio that
the journey was riddled with danger, fromcrossing bone-dry
desert with no food to facing-off bandits in Somalias badlands.
But the country was still at war: those gunmen could return
any moment and finish the job theyd started nine years back.
Hassan kept his focus on Europe, blotting the doubts and fears
fromhis mind.
His mukhala kept everyone waiting while he added as many
people to the trip as possible, wildly overcrowding his boat and
putting lives in danger fromthe off to make more money. Soon
though, Hassan and ten others four men and six women set
off towards Bosaso, a burning port city of 700,000 in Puntland,
an autonomous hinterland state in Somalias northeast.
The mukhala had told everyone the ride from Bosaso to
Egypt, the first leg of the trip, would be smooth and safe.
But when a broken, battered old wreck arrived at port,
Hassan knew theyd been conned. Some people on that
trip nearly suffocated to death on that boat, he says. The
captain shouted a lot, telling people to keep quiet or theyd be
beaten up. The boat was so full we had to be cautious no-one
accidentally booted us off the edge.
After eight treacherous days north up the Red Sea, and then
across Egypt by land, they reached the Libyan border. Then
things got worse. We walked into a desert town. But then we
were caught by fifteen or twenty armed men who we thought
were the border guards. We men were tied up in the desert
heat. It was so hot. The women were taken somewhere else not
too far away. The guards told us that the girls would be tied up,
beaten and raped. When, after two days, they demanded $300
each to leave, we found out they had been true to their word.
The gang handed each traveller a mobile phone and told
themto have relatives wire the money. Five full days passed
ESQUI RE REPORT
Wrecked boats used by
immigrants to sail at a
Lampedusa junk yard
Migrants bath on
a beach of Lampedusa
island
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 3 1
until everyone had paid up. Their debt, however, was far from
settled: another ten days were spent waiting in Libyas western
port city of Zuwarah before Hassan and the others managed to
board a second boat, this time bound for Lampedusa. The ticket
price: $800.
And then the horror started.
JUST HOW LARGE DOES THE
CEMETERY ON MY I SLAND HAVE
TO BE?
>>
WHEN YOU GROW UP on an island, says the
Irish writer Roddy Doyle, what matters is how
you stand up to the sea. Riso is a fisherman from
Lampedusa; hes been standing up to the sea for decades.
But nowhe and his fellowislanders have bigger problems,
as they are the ones on the frontlines when mass tragedy
occurs. This is a political task, he says at the islands harbour,
a tangle of rusting little boats that recent history seems to have
skipped. We are fishermen and workers, and we do workers
work. Nowthe politicians must do their bit, because we cant
tolerate so much death all around us.
Lampedusas natives have been praised for their magnanimity
in l an impossible situation. The islands mayor Giusi Nicolini,
bombastic and full of sympathy, has been especially critical of
Italian immigration policy. Just howlarge does the cemetery
on my island have to be? she says. Thanks to Bossi-Fini,
Lampedusan vessels have been told not to aid sinking migrant
boats, though this hasnt stopped locals performing daring
rescues: last month sixty-one migrants were saved in an
operation involving aeroplanes and ships. But the lawtrumps
such acts of kindness. Even the survivors of the October 3rd
catastrophe were placed under immediate investigation.
In truth, the problemis not just Lampedusa. Since the Arab
Spring of 2011 the number of migrants coming to Europe from
Africa and the Middle East has exploded. There are several
other popular routes Turkey, Malta and Spain are all migrant
hubs too, and none of themhave figured out howto deal with
the situation. This has led to criticismof the European Union by
many human rights organisations. Germany, for example, requires
immigrants to apply for asylumin the country they entered first.
If someone comes via Greece, the authorities just send themback.
Spain has erected six-metre-high fences around its north African
enclaves of Ceuta and Melilla. French interior minister Manuel
Valls has said that it is impossible to integrate the Roma people.
The European Court of Human Rights has called Greeces asylum
systeminadequate and degrading.
There has been some movement. Atask force for migration
assistance in the Mediterranean has been formed by the EU, and
is set to report to a summit later this month. Pledging $40 million
to Italy to help it cope with the influx, an EUleaders statement
said that determined action should be taken in order to prevent
the loss of lives at sea, and to avoid such human tragedies (as the
October 3rd capsizing) happening again. And Italys current
prime minister, Enrico Letta, has voiced his determination to
abolish Bossi-Fini, but his is a coalition that straddles awkward
party lines: progress will, at best, be painfully slow.
Perhaps the biggest obstacle is Europes struggle to emerge
fromrecession. The discourse has shifted in recent years from
constructive policy-making to the appeasement of an angry
electorate. This keeps the political parking meter ticking over
while voters take time to forget tragedies like Lampedusa.
The issue is about Europe and not Italy alone, says author
Annalisa Merelli, country and language editor of the Italian
Global Voices. We are just the gateway. Fortress Europe is more
than a warning: its full-blown fact. In other words, the continent
had better stand up to its sea, or itll face a newwave of tragedy.
I SAW A MAN CUTTI NG A
PI ECE OF MEAT FROM ANOTHER
MANS BODY
>>
ON THE WAY TO LAMPEDUSA, Hassans boat
ran out of drinking water and food. People began to
die. Then, soon after, the ones who were left alive
started eating the bodies. I sawa man cutting a piece of meat
fromanother mans body, he says. Eventually he and a handful
of others reached Lampedusa, only to be arrested by the coast
guard who took themto a detention centre. Three months later
Hassan was granted asylum. Some havent even got theirs after
almost five years. Hassan lived in Sicily and worked as a
mechanic until, aged twenty-three, he recently returned to
Beled Hawo to help his family with their money troubles. Things
are better now, he says: theres a stable(ish) government and
al-Shabaab is being pushed back. But more will leave for Italy;
more people will die. And hell still never be an astronaut.
Cofins of some of the
African migrants killed
in the October 3rd
shipwreck at a hangar in
Lampedusa airport
1 3 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
DI RECTORS ALFONSO
CUARN ( GRAVI TY)
AND J. C. CHANDOR
( ALL I S LOST) ON WHY
TV HASN T KI LLED
MOVI ES. FAR FROM I T.
Movies
Long
Live
T
he clich is nowestablished: Television rules. One of its
corollaries is that the movies are finished. Why drive
all the way to the multiplex, pay a small fortune for
tickets, sit in a crowded cellar smelling of coconut oil
and adolescents, and try to concentrate with the flashing
glare of strangers checking their phones when you can
relax at home for free tweeting about Breaking Bad? You
knowwhat they talk about at movie parties these days?
What they sawon television last night. The cultural
dominance once taken for granted by the movies has
begun to wane; the prominence of television continues to swell.
This autumn, two films have appeared to challenge this newstate of
affairs: Alfonso Cuarns Gravity and J. C. Chandors All Is Lost. Both are
movies that cannot be seen any other way except in the theater. Both
are intense dramas of human experience outside an environment that
can support human life, in space and in the middle of the Indian Ocean,
respectively. Both are incredibly innovative reimaginings of the possibilities
of cinema. Gravity, by the Mexico-born Cuarn, uses 3-Dto offer the
audience the terror of weightlessness. All Is Lost, by the NewJerseyborn
Chandor, is an almost entirely silent meditation on death. After a brief
prologue, Robert Redford speaks, by my count, five words. You have never
seen anything like either Gravity or All Is Lost, which is sort of the point of
both of them.
AN I NTERVI EW WI TH
ALFONSO
CUARN
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 3 3
ESQUIRE: Youre actually in the process
of releasing a movie (Gravity) and a
television show(Believe) at the same time.
Do you think TVis replacing the movies?
ALFONSOCUARN: Lets face it, TV
has been offering, for the mainstream,
better storytelling. But by the same
token, even though it gives a much better
narrative than Hollywood films, rarely
does TVachieve pure cinematic moments.
ESQ: Was that what you were looking for
in Gravity, a pure cinematic moment?
AC: There is a language that can only be
conveyed through cinema. I think most
of the films we see are just illustrated
narratives. Remember something: Most
people just half-watch TV. They watch TV
while they are doing many other things
in the environment of their home. So
what they are doing goes through their
ears as much as through their eyes. In
television, the narrative and characters
are in the foreground of everything,
because you are watching TVas you do
other stuff. Youre following the narrative.
And when its great, its amazing. When
youre doing a film, narrative is your most
important tool, but its a tool to create a
cinematographic experience, to create
those moments that are beyond narrative,
that are almost an abstraction of that
moment that hits your psyche.
ESQ: I did find that even though this
year was one of the greatest years in
the history of television, the moments
I remember come fromthe movies.
AC: Its seldomthat you find great
moments in television. Usually you
remember in Breaking Bad or any of
these other great shows you remember
situations or characters. Not moments.
But I have to say, I can make the same
argument for mainstreammovies,
which have bad narratives and also no
memorable moments. People point the
finger at studios or exhibitors, but the
truth of the matter is that theres also an
audience. I went to Telluride [filmfestival
in Colorado] and it was just amazing,
the strength of cinema not necessarily
mainstreamcinema but world cinema.
But its not what I would call mainstream.
The difference is that in television, the
great shows are mainstream.
ESQ: Do you think television is getting
better and movies are getting worse?
AC: Definitely things are changing,
but by the same token you do have
some mainstreammovies that are very
powerful. It was only two years ago that
we had Inception that is a mainstream
filmthat is also very, very interesting.
In the Seventies, great mainstream
films were the norm. Nowtheyre the
exception. Also, documentaries are
becoming very strong. The narrative level
in documentaries is starting to become
so strong that it starts to blur the line
between documentaries and fiction.
Alot of contemporary documentaries
are structured more as fiction than as
documentaries. And its an exciting thing.
1 3 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
ESQUIRE: Do you think the movies need
defending right now?
J.C. CHANDOR: TVright nowis in a
bubble. I shouldnt say bubble. Artists
are taking advantage of a newmodel.
And someday, when the other foot
comes down, my guess is that a lot of
these opportunities for people to do
this sort of amazing original stuff thats
happening in long-formstorytelling with
TVwill disappear. The golden age is
because people are taking risks, whereas
traditionally television has been a very
risk-averse mediumbecause of the cost
involved, at least in dramatic storytelling.
I think its a fascinating shakedown
thats happening financially, but talk to
a person like John Cooper at Sundance
or A. O. Scott and theyll tell you theres
more movies being made nowthan have
ever been. You know, thats been pretty
fascinating, too, whats been able to
happen technologically to the filmspace.
Hopefully, the act of gathering together in
one space with a larger-than-life screen
size and sound and everything else
I dont think thats going away any time
soon. People love doing it. Filmwill adapt.
ESQ: All Is Lost is a very filmic film.
Its not the kind of thing that you could
really see outside a theater. You did that
intentionally.
JC: I did Margin Call first. Margin Call
did not have to be seen for greatest impact
in a theatre. It helps. It helps you pay
attention. But if you are closely paying
attention to that movie Ive had people
see it on a computer screen on a plane.
Some of the most emotional reactions Ive
had to that filmwere frompeople who
sawit on planes. All Is Lost, admittedly,
fromthe moment I conceived of it, was
meant to be seen in a big old theatre with
big old sound.
ESQ: I sawit alone in a movie theatre.
JC: I knowwhat that feels like. You can
let yourself go to a pretty dark place.
ESQ: I thought it was the perfect way to
see it. This wouldnt make sense on video.
JC: I thought of that. I thought we
shouldnt create screener DVDs for the
awards season. Essentially, you have to
be in the theatre. People should come to
the movie theatre to see it. That really is
where its designed to be seen. Theres a
bunch of movies out nowthat subscribe
to that and realise that movies can offer
you a unique experience. We called it
I dont knowwhere it came froman
experiential action film. Thats what the
distributors reading this thirty-one-page
draft thats what everyone was making
their financial decisions on, and Redford
made his career decision on. All on this
little document that certainly didnt look
like a movie when you picked it up. And
then luckily, when people were done
reading it, they realised its nothing but a
movie. Thats all it is.
ESQ: Why is it nothing but a movie?
JC: Its biggest trick is the passage of
time. Where over an hour and forty
minutes, youre able to feel these eight
days weigh on this person and strip all
his components. You have to express
loneliness and boredomand moments
of isolation while always keeping
people engaged. For me, I was creating
this swashbuckling adventure that in
the third act crossed into the deepest
question we face, the contemplation of
our own mortality. It was essentially
a procedural, but because of its lack
of certain biographic and emotional
AN I NTERVI EW WI TH
J. C.
CHANDOR
ESQ: But you can get those unique
experiences only in film.
AC: It depends on what you call a
unique experience. I just sawthe
Woody Allen film[Blue Jasmine],
and I thought it was just amazing.
Its not that its going to give you
a roller coaster of a ride. Its just an
amazing film. But definitely there
are directors, even in the mainstream
cinema, in Hollywood, people like
[David] Fincher and Wes Anderson
and David O. Russell and Guillermo
del Toro, who are doing really
exciting mainstreamcinema.
ESQ: So you dont buy the argument
that television is going to replace the
movies anytime soon?
AC: I dont think that way. I think
that if anything, unknown formats
will challenge not just cinema but
television. And we dont know
whats going to happen. What is
happening is that we dont live in an
era of one or two paradigms, of TV
and films. Were living in an era in
which the paradigms are constantly
evolving, co-existing with many
other paradigms. And its not just
the media, like TV, cinema, Internet,
or whatever. People are going to be
watching filmat home very soon.
The big difference right nowis not
TVitself. It has to do with the means
of distribution of that TV, meaning
cable has allowed more freedomso
great storytellers can be doing great
stuff on television without running
into the conventional codes. And
I think thats been a fundamental
distinction. The filmindustry is in
good shape. In terms of ideas, its a
different thing. In terms of audiences,
the audiences still go to the movies.
I have to say both are healthy
cinemagoers and TVviewers. At
the same time, were growing a new
generation for which maybe both
formats are too long. Theres a new
generation thats been growing up
with the attention span of YouTube.
Thats the thing. I think the future is
just going to be different paradigms.
ESQ: Are you going to direct your
first YouTube video?
AC: You knowwhat? If you want to
keep on being relevant as a director,
I think you have to embrace the
times. And with the times come
technologies and formats. Most
3-Dfilms are crap. Those films are
crap because they are not 3-D. In
most of those films, the 3-Dis pure
commercial afterthought. Those are
not conceived and designed in 3-D.
They convert the films into 3-D. The
problemis that when you dont follow
a conception, youre not honouring
the medium.
Itsseldomthat youfnd
great momentsintelevision.
eveninBreakingBad, you
remember situationsor
characters. Not moments.
1 3 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
detail the filmcould become emotionally
devastating so that youve allowed
yourself to enter this character. And that,
obviously, is where the Redford of it all
comes in.
ESQ: Its hard to imagine Redford on
television, even in the current explosion
of great actors on TV.
JC: He becomes an everyman. Redford
has always flirted with Is he an
everyman or is he an only man? Were
always back and forth. Its a gesture
that would only work in this medium.
Redfords greatest gift to this movie is
that he has this ability nonverbally to
communicate emotional transitions
and emotional development moment
by moment in a way that I cant even
begin to knowhes going to do. He is
able to communicate hope to resilience
and resilience to perseverance, to total
and utter hopelessness in each little
moment. Its unbelievably specific.
When we were editing the movie, we
were able to bring in different takes
that communicate hyper-hyperspecific
emotions. And thats something that just
will not work as well and that you cannot
achieve in a television, long-form-story
format because no ones paying that close
attention for that long. My filmrequires
you to go there and for you to forget
everything else in your life, which is not
what I do when Imwatching television.
The character is essentially mourning his
own death, and hes not the kind of man
whos faced that before. And that just
screamed to me the grandeur that cinema
can bring to a topic.
ESQ: At the same time, Breaking Bad is
also about a man facing death.
JC: My goal is to take you on an intense
emotional journey. You go back and
look at forty hours of television, you,
as an audience member, are so much in
control of the process. You can leave the
room. You can do other things. When
youre stuck in a movie theatre, there is a
different level of engagement. The final
episode of Breaking Bad may be one thing,
but episode seven of season two is a very
different narrative flowthan something
youre expecting a person to absolutely
lock into. And this filmrequires you to do
that. Certainly, not all movies require you
to do so. I do require you to fully commit.
Which is really what any great filmdoes,
even the great epics like Lawrence of
Arabia or The Godfather, four hours long.
Their power comes fromthese small
moments, looks, and silences, along with,
sure, adrenaline and joy and fear. Thats
what films do best.
ESQ: Do you think your kids will care
more for movies or television?
JC: Imnot sure our kids will knowwhats
one or the other. You take a programme
like Sex and the City. Why couldnt those
movies have been happening between the
seasons of the show? To me, ten, fifteen
years fromnow, that will probably be a
moot point. I think there will always be
epic blockbusters that are solely designed
for that experience. But I think the lines
are going to be blurred creatively. If I have
a really successful filmand I want to go
make an eight-episode mini-season, I may
go do that. And I could deliver that to an
audience myself. Imnot a purist. It didnt
drive me crazy my ego bothered me a
little bit that Margin Call went straight
to video, essentially had a one-day release.
I just consider myself a storyteller, so I
mjust going to choose the mediumthat
I think best tells each particular story.
But at this point in my life, the next thing
Imdoing may blur that line. All Is Lost,
in the purest sense of the word, is a movie.
I do believe that films should stick to what
they do best. That will not change, that
shouldnt change.
I thought
weshouldnt
createAll is
Lost screener
DVDsfor
theawards
season.
essentially,
youhave
tobeinthe
theatre.
1 3 8 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
THE PAST
Following on fromhis Oscar-
winning masterpiece ASeparation,
Iranian auteur Asghar Farhadi this
time heads to Paris for more finely-
crafted family tensions. The Artists
Brnice Bejo plays a Frenchwoman
hoping to finalise the divorce from
her charismatic Iranian husband
(Ali Mosaffa) in order to marry a
newboyfriend (Tahar Rahim). But
what seems like a simple process
soon knots itself into a tangled web
of complications, and questions our
very need to turn to the past in order
to move forward.
INSIDE LLEWLYN DAVIS
Amajestic ode to artistry and
unsung genius, this is the Coen
brothers back to their brilliant
if somewhat melancholic best,
taking a fictitious dive into the
very real folk scene of NewYorks
Greenwich Village in the early 1960s.
Despite its sombre, philosophical
undertones, the story has roomfor
riotous entertainment, following
a wintery week in the life of a
struggling musician played by
the irresistibly beleaguered Oscar
Isaacs as he fails to capitalise on
his unquestionable talent.
ALEX RI TMAN ON
THE HI GHLI GHTS OF
THI S YEAR S DUBAI
I NTERNATI ONAL FI LM
FESTI VAL
DIFF
T
he last nine years in cinema have seen the release of one
ok one and a half Terrence Malick titles. Meanwhile
in the Middle East a fledging festival has grown over
the same period of time to become arguably the most
important event in the regional filmcalendar. This year,
Dubai International FilmFestival celebrates its tenth
anniversary as an altogether different beast to the one
that began back in 2004 with the quiet screening of
Le Grand Voyage at the Madinat Arena. Having since
showcased hundreds of world premieres (most notably
2011s Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol, which sawthe entire city
strain under the weight of TomCruises presence), provided the running
shoes for a whole newgeneration of Arab talent and developed an
industry section that has become a vital cog in supporting the regions
cinema industry, DIFF is nowentering double digits with style (however
much this might be lacking on the red carpet). Heres our pick of this
years films.
DUBAI INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL: THE DETAILS
December 6-14, with screenings across the Madinat Jumeirah, Vox Cinemas
at Mall of the Emirates and at Burj Park. Amr Diab will also play as part of the
festival at Burj Park on December 6th. Full schedule of films to be confirmed.
For more information and tickets visit www.dubaifilmfest.com
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 3 9
AMERICAN HUSTLE
Earlier in the year, the somewhat reactionary fashion blog industry took a sharp
turn towards bonkers when photos emerged of ladies favourite Bradley Cooper
sporting some rather tight curls. Rather than doing his best Shirley Temple
impression, however, Cooper was simply preparing for David O. Russells real-life
1970s tale of FBI informers and NewJersey mafia bosses, alongside Christian
Bale, Amy Adams, Jeremy Renner and Jennifer Lawrence, who manages to blow
up a microwave in the trailer.
OMAR
After opening DIFF back in 2005,
Hany Abu Assads gripping tale of two
Palestinian suicide brothers, Paradise
Now, would go on to win a Golden Globe
and receive an Oscar nomination.
Eight years later, his latest drama,
starring AdamBakri, is attracting the
same sort of attention; a psychological
thriller set in the West Bank that
cleverly portrays the limitations of
living under occupation and howthe
fight to overthrowit can dominate a
persons life.
CONDOM LEAD
This short by identical twins Tarzan
and Arab (real names Ahmed and
Mohammed Abu Nasser) fromthe Gaza
Strip is an unlikely parody of Israels
bloody invasion in 2008-2009, known
as Operation Cast Lead. The filmsees a
couples attempts to get jiggy repeatedly
interrupted by the sounds of destruction
all around. Earlier this year it became
the first Palestinian short to make it into
Cannes international competition.
THE SELFISH GIANT
Shameless meets The Horse Whisperer
in this loose adaptation of an Oscar Wilde
short. Amid poverty in the north of
England, Arbor and Swifty are two young
boys who find their calling in scavenging
for metal objects they can sell to the local
dodgy dealer, who has a nice sideline
in illegal horse-and-trap drag racing.
Gritty and with a heavy Ken Loach-esque
social realist heart, this is Kes for the 21st
century fromClio Barnard, one of the
UKs brightest directorial futures.
MAY IN THE SUMMER
Headstrong born-again Christian
mothers, tiring sisters acting like children
and a deceased patriarch who appears
to be causing more grief in death than
he managed in life, Cherien Dabis prises
open middle class Jordan family dramas
with comic effect in this followup to her
acclaimed Amreeka. With HiamAbbas,
Nadine Labaki and a small role by Omar
Sharif, the rising Palestinian-American
director has also managed to amass a
very impressive regional cast.
1 4 0 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
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1 4 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
THE SOLES
of MalcolmGladwells running shoes have black pads that
are spaced out like an animal paw. Some footwear designer
in Oregon or Bavaria presumably came up with that when he
was researching the hoof of an impala or something. This not
especially illuminating insight occurs to me as I become slowly
hypnotised by his whirring feet, attempting to keep pace with the
fifty-year-old author on a lap of three London parks: St Jamess,
Green and then Hyde. Id pitched the idea of a jog, but I had
clearly underestimated Gladwell, who as a teenager was the best
miler for his age in all of Canada. The only time Ive run this fast
was when I was about to miss an aeroplane. I managed to sustain
the pace on that occasion for around two hundred metres.
Today were due to cover seven miles. Slowly, inexorably,
Gladwells black, corkscrew ringlets start to bob off into the
distance. It is one of those murderously hot days the UK had
this summer, and my mouth has gone from parched to metallic
until Im sure I can taste blood. Hes oblivious, not sweating,
barely breathing.
Malcolm! I finally gasp. He turns around, his legs in
perpetual motion. Im. Done. Ill. Meet. You. Back. At. The. Park.
Exit. He nods his assent, and then he is gone.
This, in case you were wondering, is colour: what features
writers look for to help bring their subjects to life. On previous
assignments, colour has involved spending a morning at a disused
cycle track on the Isle of Man with Mark Cavendish, an afternoon
driving a BMWZ4 with Scarlett Johansson and an evening at a
Turkish bathhouse in LA with Colin Farrell. The hope is that a
relevant yet unexpected location or activity will jolt the interview
in an unforeseen direction. Perhaps Imnot doing it right, but
my adventures in colour have typically been odd, sometimes
awkward and not especially revealing with the exception of the
Turkish bathhouse, where nothing much of anything was left to
the imagination.
With Gladwell, the intention was that the running would
offer a different perspective on his newbook, David and Goliath,
his fifth. Since 2000, when The Tipping Point was released, it is
hard to think of a writer whose work has been so influential and
agenda-defining. Even if you have not read The Tipping Point
billed, on release, as an intellectual adventure story you
will doubtless be familiar with the ubiquitous termit spawned,
which was trotted out by politicians, business leaders and, in a
particularly gratifying moment for Gladwell, inspired an ITVquiz
showpresented by Ben Shephard.
His follow-ups, specifically Blink in 2005 and three years later
Outliers, have been even more popular. The impact of these books
can be measured in all manner of unanticipated ways. Thanks
largely to Gladwell, redshirting has become a thing: parents
delay their childs entrance into nursery so that they can benefit
fromthe academic and sporting advantages that typically ensue
frombeing the eldest in a schools intake.
All of Gladwells books touch on success in some form, and
David and Goliath is no different. Subtitled Underdogs, Misfits
and the Art of Battling Giants, it offers case studies and strategies
for howto defy your disadvantages. Gladwell is famous for the
esoteric examples that he weaves coherently and compellingly
into his narrative, but, as his legend has grown, it has become too
tempting not to analyse his own life and career by the theories
he puts down. When he wrote Outliers an examination of
individuals whose achievements lie outside normal experience
an inevitable question was: howdid Gladwell himself become
an outlier? Nowwith David and Goliath, there is a similarly
obvious gambit: what can a man who is said to earn Dhs14.8mper
book tell us about being an underdog?
Gladwell, in the nicest possible way, is not especially helpful
in settling these queries. Before we set off on the run, I ask if
his professional success has changed himpersonally. Imjust
doing the same thing Ive done my entire life, he says, which is
basically sit in coffee shops and write. Immuch more caffeinated
than Id have been otherwise, but no, nothings changed. Is he
aware of the power that his books have? That people make huge
decisions about their childrens education and in some cases
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 4 3
schedule pregnancies because of theories he has expounded?
Theres no way to measure that stuff, he says simply, so you
cant dwell on it.
What about the impact of his background on his work?
Gladwell was brought up in rural Canada by an English father and
Jamaican mother and nowlives in NewYork. Does he feel he has
an outsiders perspective? Thats a good question, he deflects.
But I have no way of knowing, so I dont really think about that.
So, that was why we went running. As colour goes, it was
painful and a little embarrassing but once my heart rate had
returned to normal parameters, I realised it had not been a waste
of time. One conclusion was obvious: MalcolmGladwell runs
really, really fast; not unlike an impala, in fact. But its just possible
that a couple of other aspects of his personality were revealed, too.
WHI LE DAVI D&GOLI ATH
has a clear family resemblance to Gladwells previous work, it
also presents a less familiar side to the writer. It is more personal
and heartfelt; sometimes his words bristle with passion, even
anger. Gladwell has been moving in this direction perceptibly
for a while now. When The Tipping Point landed, it was a product
of its time: the turn of the century, the dotcomboom, lowbrow
subjects given the highbrowtreatment. His debut started with
analysis of the strange reinvention of Hush Puppies shoes and
then dazzlingly linked that phenomenon to the invention of the
Aeron chair, suicide rates in Micronesia and a drop in crime in
NewYork in the Nineties. Reading The Tipping Point was like
listening to an iPod shuffle as it curated an eclectic but inspired
selection of tracks.
David and Goliath, meanwhile, is most definitely an album.
Partly this must be down to Gladwells age and experience, but
I wonder if its also an implicit response to his critics? As his
literary career took off, he was followed around by a line fromthe
American business magazine Fast Company that described himas
a rock star, a spiritual leader, a stud. Despite his day job as a staff
writer for The NewYorker the most desirable gig in journalism
one question kept cropping up with each newbook: was
Gladwell a serious author or merely a guru? David and Goliath is
an attempt to settle the matter. I wrote my first book when I was
in my late thirties, he says. I could not have written this book in
my late thirties. I just wasnt capable of doing the things I do now.
In those early days, Gladwell adopted the stance of an
intellectual mercenary: he was attracted, it appeared, not to an
ideology or amoral code, but to any argument guaranteed to
surprise. The last time I interviewed him, in 2008, I asked if he
would prefer to be interesting or right. He practically snorted.
Oh! Interesting, he replied. I dont even knowwhy thats a
question! If I was President of the United States, Id rather be
right than interesting. If I was CEOof a company, Id rather be
right than interesting. But Ima journalist what journalist
would rather be right than interesting? Consistency is the most
overrated of all human virtues Imsomeone who changes his
mind all the time.
Five years on, Gladwell doesnt remember saying that and he
is keen to qualify the sentiment. I said that only because I dont
believe you can be right. Abetter way of putting it is that Id rather
provoke you into thinking about your position than recruit you
to my side, which is slightly different. At the top of my list is not
making you agree with me, it is capturing your interest and forcing
CONSI STENCY I S THE
MOST OVERRATED OF
ALL HUMAN VI RTUES
I M SOMEONE WHO
CHANGES HI S MI ND.
Gladwell (right)
often beat Dave Reid
(left) who went on to
become Canadas
1,500mrecord holder
1 4 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
I D RATHER MAKE PEOPLE CRY
THAN LAUGH, SO THI S BOOK I S
ABOUT TRYI NG TO MAKE PEOPLE CRY
you to re-examine your position. If you do that, Imsatisfied.
Still, if you knowthat your book is going to be sitting on the
bedside tables of Bill Clinton and Bill Gates, it might encourage
you to write less about shoes and more about, say, schools or social
policy. David and Goliath starts with a prototypical Gladwellian
retelling of that famous afternoon in the Valley of Elah in the 11th
century BC: Goliath, he contends, likely suffered fromacromegaly,
a syndrome that results in an excess of growth hormone, which
would account for his size, but might also have resulted in an eye
defect that left himvulnerable to Davids fleet-footed attacks.
His point is that what we interpret as disadvantages (in this case,
Davids slight build) can often be overcome by astute tactics,
radical thinking and fighting the battle on your terms.
Gladwell applies this theory to dyslexics who, despite their
difficulties with reading and processing written language, are
disproportionately likely to enjoy success as entrepreneurs. He
also cites a study revealing that creatives innovators, artists
and the like are much more likely to have lost a parent in
childhood. In one particularly powerful chapter, he dissects one
of the defining episodes of the civil rights movement in the US: an
image of a black teenage boy being set upon by a snarling German
shepherd police dog during a protest in Birmingham, Alabama, in
May 1963. It turns out that the photograph, which appeared on the
front pages of newspapers, appalled President John F Kennedy
and was debated in Congress, was strategically incited by a small
band of activists led by Martin Luther King, Jr. They triumphed,
Gladwell concludes, because of the unexpected freedomof
having nothing to lose. Its inspiring stuff.
While the stars of Outliers were often
well-known The Beatles, Mozart, the
aforementioned Bill Gates Gladwell
primarily focuses on unheralded
individuals in his newbook. Vivek
Ranadiv is the coach of an under-12s
girls basketball team. Rosemary Lawlor
is a young Catholic mother living in
Belfast in the early years of the Troubles.
Caroline Sacks is a woman who might
have gone to the University of Maryland,
but chose instead to attend the more
prestigious Brown University. These
subjects might not sound obviously
gripping, but Gladwell relates their tales
with a compelling empathy. Ima lot
more interested in people than I used to
be, he says. I used to be most interested
in abstract ideas and people were an
afterthought, but thats changed a bit. My
writing has become more subtle.
The qualities of underdogs are
universal and, to prove his point, Gladwell
examines the Blitz, when Southern
England was bombed by the Luftwaffe
for fifty-seven consecutive nights in 1940,
resulting in forty thousand deaths and
the damage or destruction of one million
London homes. Fewevents have been
so important in shaping the self-identity
of the British: a narrative that covers
everything fromstiff upper lips to their
ability to organise a successful Olympic
Games. Gladwell, however, is not buying it. There was nothing
specific about the way that Londoners responded to the Blitz; all
groups, he contends, react to adversity in a broadly similar way.
Who better to come up with a powerful national myth
than the Brits, he says with a twinkle. Thats what British
people do better than anyone else: spin stories about themselves
and lost greatness.
David and Goliath has bite. In the past, Gladwell has been
known for coining archetypes and pithy expressions: mavens
and connectors, thin slicing or the ten-thousand-hour rule
have all been popularised by him. This book is harder to reduce
to a buzz word, perhaps because subjects such as the Blitz, the
Troubles and the American civil rights movement do not lend
themselves to glib reductions.
I didnt want the book to be too dark, but all great stories
have some hint of tragedy in them, Gladwell says. Id rather
make people cry than laugh, so this book is about trying to make
people cry.
Does this signify a change in Gladwell himself? Nah, he
replies. Ive always been morbid.
GLADWELL WAS RAI SED
in a small farming town in Ontario called Elmira. His parents
left England at the end of the Sixties in search of a bigger
plot of land and as a mixed-race couple a more accepting
community. (Not long before Gladwell was born, his parents
The original or nothing
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1 4 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
were evicted froma London flat after one day. You didnt tell
me your wife was coloured, the landlady told his father.) They
found both in Elmira, which is in the heart of Canadas Old
Order Mennonite country.
Mennonites are a Christian sect known for their pacifism, and
Gladwell has compared his home town to the Amish settlements
in Pennsylvania. His parents were Presbyterian, but one time the
family helped with a local Mennonite barn-raising. There were
probably two hundred people there that day, Gladwell once
wrote. They came fromthe surrounding farms in black horse-
drawn buggies, the women in gauzy caps and ginghamdresses,
the men in white shirts and black pants. The family would get
a fewsheep every spring and slaughter themin the autumn,
Gladwell would do Bible study every night and it was not until
he was twenty three that he had regular access to a television.
The tolerance of Mennonites is a feature of David and Goliath.
In one chapter, Gladwell contrasts the experiences of two parents
who each lost a child to a violent, unprovoked assault. Mike
Reynolds whose eighteen-year-old daughter was shot during a
mugging set off with retributive fervour and wound up creating
Californias three-strikes law, which entailed anyone convicted
of two serious offences and a third crime, of any level, being set a
jail termof twenty-five years to life. Meanwhile, Wilma Derksen,
a Canadian Old Order Mennonite, responded to the killing of
her daughter by offering forgiveness to the perpetrator. Gladwell
relates the twin tales like an expert litigator manipulating a jury:
it is artful, contrarian storytelling but ultimately he leaves no one
in any doubt which approach he favours. Its very plain in the
book howdisturbed I amby Mike Reynolds and howmoved I am
by Wilma Derksen, Gladwell says. The book is quite religious
in theme: forgiveness, turning your back on material possessions,
the sins of the wealthy theres a lot of religiosity. The Mennonite
world is quite familiar to me, theres a reason why its portrayed so
sympathetically. Its the world of my family.
It is not the only personal aspect, either. Gladwell has a
recurring interest in the book and elsewhere in what he calls the
big fish, little pond effect. He makes a powerful case for steering
clear of the big pond and this, he cheerfully acknowledges, is
partly his own prejudice. Gladwell is not a product of a private
education that led inexorably to Harvard, Yale or one of the
vaunted American universities. Instead, he went to the local
school, with the Mennonite farmkids, and then he became the
first of its pupils ever to make it to the University of Toronto,
where he studied history. His newbook is very explicit here: the
best schools simply create a legion of Goliaths ready to be taken
down by leaner, hungrier Davids. I was a big fish in a little pond,
Gladwell says. I hadnt put it together before, but growing up
in this very, very rural community, I had a feeling of academic
invincibility my entire childhood. Wholly undeserved, but it
turned out to be very useful. I remember having a friend in college
who went to an elite private school in Toronto. I thought she had
the greatest advantages in the world; Imsure she had an IQof
160, but she had nothing but academic insecurities. I was baffled
in college: why is she this way? And then I realised I had the
advantage and she got screwed!
When it came to athletics, however, Gladwell was a Goliath.
He started taking running seriously aged thirteen and soon after
he won the county cross-country championships. He pushed
himself so hard that day he almost lost consciousness when he
crossed the finish line. Still, he had learned the most important
lesson of athletics: physical barriers dont exist, only psychological
ones. (After ducking out of our run in Hyde Park, this is evidently
something I have still to grasp.) The following year, at the 1978
Ontario championships, he was the 1,500 metres champion
for Midget Boys a category, one suspects, that has since been
renamed clocking a seriously impressive four minutes five
seconds. Aphotograph fromthis race still exists and Gladwell
strains for the line like his life depends on it. The boy hes beating,
Dave Reid, would go on to become a legend of Canadian middle-
distance running. Gladwell has since supplied the caption, My
greatest triumph!, which led to an online debate on just how
much faster he would have gone without his afro. But little more
than a year later, Gladwell retired fromcompetitive running.
Why? Injuries played a part, but mostly it was the fact that he
was no longer the best. In 1979, aged fifteen, he returned to the
Ontario championships and actually ran a faster time (4:03.3) but
only finished in fourth. I never thought I was going to go to the
Olympics or anything grand, says Gladwell now. So thats why I
stopped racing. There was no future in it.
Gladwell may not have competed seriously anymore, but he
never forgot the lessons of his athletics career. After pushing
himself to exhaustion to win those first two races, he had started
to question why someone with his advantages a healthy and
normal teenager froma well-adjusted family would endure
such discomfort in order to prevail. This dilemma is presented
in a more extreme formin David and Goliath: giants get toppled
either because they become complacent or they learn what it
takes to sustain their excellence, and that knowledge becomes
paralysing. My fear of the experience grewtoo overwhelming,
is howGladwell explains his own athletic downfall. In other
words, the hard part of success is often not getting to the top but
staying there.
Gladwell sees parallels between running and writing. As
a runner, he is obsessed with the grace and elegance of his
movements; nowhe is equally interested in the flowand cadence
of his sentences. To him, they are both aesthetic endeavours. But
hed be happy for the comparisons to end there. Gladwell is a
literary Goliath if ever there was one, but he would prefer not to
think about himself in those terms. Every chance he gets, he takes
pains to normalise what he does. Imnot a thinker, a philosopher
or any sort of visionary. No, he says. Ima storyteller, a translator
of academic research and a journalist. Its very familiar, prosaic: I
call up people, I interviewpeople and I read the stuff I write.
Remember, he goes on, in most cases, Imwriting about
pre-existing ideas. Theres often an intellectual movement, so Im
maybe pouring some accelerant on it, but Imrarely inventing a
cause. Ima publicist for a lot of this stuff and a packager. Thats
not humble; its fact. Id be lying if I told you otherwise.
Its true, but also not. By the age of fourteen, Gladwell knewthe
difference between being great and merely good at an activity.
Perhaps running helped himdevise a coping strategy: if you
want to become the best and stay there it helps to convince
yourself that what you are doing is not remotely exceptional. At
the end of our run we me, a wheezing, broken man; him, not a
curl out of place walk back towards his hotel in Covent Garden.
Would he, I wonder, prefer to have been an Olympic athlete
instead of what he is doing now?
No, he says. Winning races is nice, but it was never
transformative. The pleasure doesnt come fromrunning the
fastest youve ever run, it comes fromjust the experience of very
moderately testing yourself. I find that kinda nice.
David and Goliath by Malcolm Gladwell is out now
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 4 7
Sacoor
Brothers
Patrick Dempsey, also known as Dr
McDreamy in the medical drama
Greys Anatomy (ask your other half),
may have cheek bones as sharp as razor
blades, but the 47-year old is just as
sharp behind the wheel of a car. In fact
the Hollywood actor, when hes not on
set, is a motorsport fanatic and takes
part in races such as the 24 hours of
Les Mans and Daytona. He owns a GT
class race teamand is an avid collector
of vintage and sports cars, which not
only gives himour seal of approval
but also makes for a fitting face
when it comes to showcasing Sacoor
Brothers A/W13 collection. Slimfit
sports shirts in plaid, wool suits (using
the finest fabrics fromluxury fabric
suppliers Lora Piano and Cerruti) and
Jacquard design knits, all part of this
seasons collection, bridge the gap
nicely between smart work wear and
weekend garb, making it the perfect
excuse to put the roof down and escape
for the weekend.
Visit sacoorbrothers.com for more information.
ESQUI RE ADVERTORI AL
Shirt, Dhs395
Polo Shirt, Dhs395
Trousers, Dhs445 Polo Shirt, Dhs395
Polo shirt, Dhs395
Drving Loafers, Dhs725 Polo Shirt, Dhs295
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STYLE
ESQUIRE CELEBRATED ITS 80TH ANNIVERSARY
LAST MONTH AND OVER THOSE DECADES IT HAS
GIVEN A LOT OF ADVICE. ON THE FOLLOWING
PAGES, WE PRESENT THE BEST OF IT, WITH
TODAYS BEST CLOTHES (AND A FEW OF TODAYS
BEST-DRESSED MEN) AS PROOF THAT SOME
TRUTHS ACTUALLY ARE TIMELESS.
THE
OF
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On Lucas Flores Piran:
Double-breasted cashmere
coat (Dhs8,630), two-button
wool jacket (Dhs7,530),
and cotton shirt (Dhs1,395)
by Gucci; cotton jeans
(Dhs286) by Levis; suede
monk-straps (Dhs752) by
Grenson; steel automatic
Double-Retrograde Calendar
watch (Dhs8,500) by Seiko;
cashmere scarf (Dhs5,612)
by Kiton; silk pocket square
(Dhs110) by Boss.
BE BRAVE: LAYER
COLOUR UPON
COLOUR TO BUILD A
LOOK THAT SAYS YOU
HAVE THE SPIRIT
TO EXPERIMENT,
THE IMAGINATION
TO BLEND VIVID
COLOURS INTO
A PLEASING
COMBINATION. THE
TRICK IS TO BUILD
AROUND ONE ITEM.
USE YOUR EYES. BE
CONFIDENT. WITH
GOOD COMMON
SENSE YOU CAN PUT
YOURSELF TOGETHER
IN AS FORCEFUL A
MANNER AS THE
INTREPID MEN ON
THESE PAGES.
FEBRUARY 1 977
MARCH 2005
BLUE JEANS ARE
GOOD; DARK-BLUE
JEANS ARE BETTER.
LEAVE THE BOOT-
CUTS TO COWGIRLS
AND BLACK DENIM
TO EX-CONS.
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 4 9
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Steel Ballon Bleu watch (Dhs20,385) and palladium Diablo de Cartier pen (Dhs2,460) by Cartier; sunglasses (Dhs510)
by Carrera; wool pocket square (Dhs606) by Brunello Cucinelli; leather-and-cashmere gloves (Dhs1,230) by Dunhill;
leather bracelet (Dhs826) by Tods; metal cuff links (Dhs132) by Massimo Dutti; leather zippered folder (Dhs2,920) by
Smythson; l h b k (Dhs617) by Coach; leather-and-metal key chain (Dhs1,505) by Louis Vuitton.
While dressing like your grandfather hasnt always been the goal
especially where the sock garters are concerned heres a place
to make an exception: thewin tip. The perforated shoe style
(spawned in rural Scotland and Ireland, where holes were punched
in brogues to drain out the water that inevitably got into them) has become an
homage to classic style, as the shape of the toe cap and the pattern of holes have
been maintained for centuries.
Fromleft: By Rockport (Dhs532); OKeeffe (Dhs2,278); AllenEdmonds (Dhs1,268).
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COMING BACK FOR
MORE LIKE A CORDUROY
SPORTS JACKET.
Two-button cotton corduroy
jacket (Dhs1,545) by J. Hilburn.
SEPTEMBER 1950
APRI L 1951
AUG.
2 0 0 2
ACCESSORIES ARE THE SUGAR IN YOUR COFFEE,
THE SALT ON YOUR STEAK, THE DETAILS
IN YOUR CLOTHES YOUR NECKWEAR AND
SOCKS CAN BE BLOOD BROTHERS OR DISTANT
RELATIVES DEPENDS ON YOUR TASTE.
First thingto consider is colour, second is cut, third is
ccasion. Greys, Browns, Blueswith their individual
ues see that they suit your hair, eyes, complexion.
hen: single or double breasted; are you tall or short,
ender or robust? Next: day or evening, city or country.
you buy with these basics in mind, if you choose
eliberately andnot haphazardly, youre certain to show
pat the proper place and time, properly dressed.
ARCH 1952
MARCH 2000
YOU DONT HAVE
TO BLAZE ACROSS THE
COLOUR SPECTRUM WHEN
PAIRING A SHIRT AND TIE
WITH A SUIT; A SUBTLE
VARIATION IN COLOUR,
ALMOST MONOCHROME,
BESPEAKS A CERTAIN
UNDERSTATED
ELEGANCE.
Smythson; leather notebook (Dh eathe ) y
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up
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a
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C
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S
a
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v
a
t
o
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.
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On Jai Lennard: two-button
wool-and-mohair suit (Dhs7,090)
by Prada; cotton shirt (Dhs1,267)
by Ermenegildo Zegna; silk tie
(Dhs495) by John Varvatos;
leather monk-straps (Dhs2,005)
by Tods; steel Big Pilots watch
(Dhs56,565) by IWC.
We hear pretty frequently
that these pages devote
insufficient attention to
the wants of the average
man. Readers keep writing
in telling us they wouldnt
care to be found dead in
the too colourful outfits
that we are prone to
illustrate and describe.
Stuck for an answer,
we merely say that we
wouldnt exactly enjoy it
ourselves. But here, praise
be, is a plain blue suit,
wherewith we hope to
mollify the ire of the
plain reader.
OCTOBER 1935
PEAKED LAPELS
ARE A GOOD THING,
TOO, BECAUSE THEIR
POINTS ALSO
EMPHASISE THE
VERTICAL EFFECT.
OCTOBER 1942
The same amount of
shirt should rise above a
suit-jacket collar as that
which peeks from under
its sleeve one-half inch.
Although I occasionally
fret about the amount of
shirt cuff showing (since
many comfy shirts have
been laundered into semi-
oblivion), I never even look
at my suit collar vis--vis
my shirt collar.
SEPTEMBER 1996
THE REQUIRED
NARROWER TROUSERS
WITHOUT CUFFS
CONFORM TO A
GOOD STANDARD OF
DRESS. THESE HAVE
BEEN NOTED AND
ILLUSTRATED IN THE
FASHION PAGES OF
ESQUIRE, PARTICULARLY
IN CONNECTION WITH
THE RETURN OF SIMPLE
ELEGANCE. PLEATS AT
THE WAISTBAND ARE TO
BE ELIMINATED.
JUNE 1942
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IN THE NEW JEANS-AND-A-SUIT-JACKET
ENVIRONMENT, A POCKET SQUARE
CAN STAND IN FOR A TIE. HERES HOW.
I often take a brand new
suit or hat and throwit up
against the wall a fewtimes
to get that stufy, square
newness out of it.
To be done only with a silk handkerchief.
Begin by spreading the material across a flat
surface and pinching at the center, allowing
the fabric to pillowaround the pinch. Only an
elegant pattern will do.
Silk pocket square (Dhs293) by Paul Stuart; wool jacket
(Dhs2,387) by J. Hilburn.
The structured nature of this style can be
done with almost any material: silk, linen, or
cotton. Very measured and exact, it calls for
a quiet pattern on the hankie and is usually
worn by men youd trust to invest your money.
Silk pocket square (Dhs367) by Ermenegildo Zegna; wool
jacket (Dhs2,185) by Billy Reid.
MARCH 2005
FRED ASTAI RE,
SEPTEMBER 1960
Straight out of the 1960s comes this straight-
across approach. Donned by spies, news
anchors, and heads of state, this style is simple
and clean. It should be done with a white
linen or cotton handkerchief.
Cotton pocket square (Dhs258) by J. Press; cotton jacket
(Dhs2,369) by Boss.
Constructed in the same fashion as the
Astaire pocket square but with the additional
step of folding up the corners. This style is
slightly more ragged in a very purposeful way.
Must still be done with silk.
Silk pocket square (Dhs649) by Gucci; wool-and-
cashmere jacket (Dhs2,920) by Faonnable.
ASTAI RE, F.
KENNEDY, J. F.
BOND, J.
CHURCHI LL, W.
DECEMBER 2001
THE VELVET JACKET
HAS TWO IMMEDIATE
EFFECTS: FIRST, PEOPLE
WILL WONDER WHO
YOU ARE AND WHAT
YOU ARE UP TO, AND
SECOND, EVERY
WOMAN AT THE PARTY
WILL WANT TO TOUCH
YOUR SLEEVE.
AUGUST 1958
CAPES ARE
COMING BACK IN
FORCE THIS YEAR
GREAT FOR INNER
ROOMINESS AND
WARMTH.
The caveman was a lucky and very hairy man. His head somewhat resembled the
modern floor mop and his eyebrows were nice and bushy. To protect his eyes from
the sun, all he did was push his overgrown cowlicks down over his face, rufle up his
eyebrows, pull up his whiskers and squint. But modern customs have abandoned us
to the barber and therefore sunglasses, with their conveniently dark tinted lenses,
to cover up equally dark circles and to foil Old Sol. Sunglasses (Dhs716) by Ray-Ban.
AUGUST 1939
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LEATHER, AS AN
AUTHORITY ON SUCH
THINGS ONCE SAID,
SPEAKS A MANS
LANGUAGE. RECENTLY
ITS BEEN SPEAKING
SO LOUD AND LONG
AND APPEARING IN
SO MANY SHAPES
AND FORMS THAT
WE DECIDED TO
TAKE A LOOK AT ITS
VARIOUS SOURCES,
AND FIND OUT WHAT
GOES ON IN THE
PRODUCING END OF
THIS MILD MASCULINE
MANIA. LEATHER
PRODUCTION, WE
FOUND, IS NOT
ONLY AN INDUSTRY
BUT AN ART.
DECEMBER 1939
On Brad Fisher:
Leather bomber jacket
(Dhs4,389) and cotton
shirt (Dhs532) by Polo
Ralph Lauren; cotton
khakis (Dhs249) by
Dockers; suede boots
(Dhs2,075) by Tods;
steel Navigation Anti-
Magnetic watch
(Dhs8,448)
by Longines.
In addition to the whole
killing-the-enemy-and-
blowin-up-stuff routine,
Uncle Sam has proven himself
to be a damn fine designer.
Take a look in your closet and
count up the victories. Those
khakis you wear to invade
the hardware store? The
leather jacket you don when
conducting manoeuvres in
the park with your kids?
That raincoat you throw on
to mount an offensive on
the movie theatre? All
courtesy of [the US] military-
industrial complex.
FEBRUARY 2000
AT BEST, COTTON
HAS SPECIAL GENIUS
FOR CARRYING OFF
CRISP LINES AND
EXTRA DETAIL, SUCH
AS POCKETS AND
BUTTONS; AT LEAST,
ITS ENORMOUSLY
PRACTICAL.
MAY 1959
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 5 3
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Why will a man browse through rack-on-rack of ties, look through pile-on-pile of shirts, but hesitate to try on more
than a pair or two of shoes before he buys? Newfootwear, it seems to us, should receive as much consideration
as newsuits surely they get as much wear. The newshoe styles are worth spending time on, too look for the lasts
that have trimmer lines, have fewer decorations, have less dead weight to lug around.
From left: By DiBianco (Dhs3,489); Grenson (Dhs1,415); Johnston & Murphy (Dhs1,010).
APR.
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Double-breasted wool jacket
(Dhs10,395) by Brunello Cucinelli.
WALKING INTO A MEETING WITH A
BEAUTIFUL LEATHER CASE WONT
ALWAYS CLINCH THE SALE OR GET YOU
ELECTED TO THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
IT JUST REINFORCES YOUR GOOD TASTE,
INTELLIGENCE AND STYLE. AND WHEN IT
COMES TO GETTING AHEAD, VISIBILITY
IS EVERYTHING.
Leather briefcase (Dhs6,115) by Tods.
MARCH 1986
THERES A CASUAL
FEELING ABOUT
THE BLAZER THAT
SEEMS TO RUB OFF
ON ITS WEARERTHE
CONVENTIONALIST
BLAZER IS NAVY
BLUE WITH METAL OR
WHITE PEARL BUTTONS;
THE NEWEST BLAZERS ARE
IN COLOURS A GOOD
LOOKING SILVER-GREY
SHADE THAT WEARS WELL
WITH DARKER GREY OR
DARK BLUE SLACKS, AND
A MAROON THAT GOES
WELL WITH GREY SLACKS.
JUNE 1948
MARCH 1999
THERE ARE TWO
DIFFERENT STYLES OF
LONG-SLEEVED V-NECK.
THERES THE ONE WITH
THE PLUNGING NECKLINE
THAT, WHEN WORN WITH
NOTHING UNDERNEATH,
FRAMES A NICE PATCH
OF PECTORAL FRINGE.
AND THEN THERES
THE LESS GENEROUS
BUT MUCH MORE
GENTLEMANLY HIGH
V-NECKIT IS THE HIGH
V-NECK THAT MOST MEN
WANT. PLEASE.
1 5 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
On Orfeus Shankle:
Cotton shirt
(Dhs1,818) and wool
trousers (part of
suit, Dhs12,470) by
Giorgio Armani; silk
tie (Dhs405) by
Emporio Armani;
steel automatic
Double-Retrograde
Calendar watch
(Dhs8,500) by Seiko.
THE SO-CALLED
REGULAR COLLARIS
PROBABLY ADAPTED TO
MORE FACIAL CONTOURS
THAN ANY OTHER.
IT GOES WELL WITH
FACES OF MODERATE
PROPORTIONS AND
ALSO ADAPTS ITSELF
TO BROAD OR TO LONG,
NARROW FACES.
MARCH 1945
EXTREME CARE IS
TAKEN IN SELECTING
A SMALL PATTERNED
TIE, FOR A MAN MUST
STEER CLEAR
OF THE LOUD, TOTEM
POLE VARIETY.
FEBRUARY 1 943
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RELAXED
CARDIGANS
STRIKE
A PROPER NOTE
FOR ENJOYABLE
CASUAL
PASTIMES.
Wool shawl-collar
cardigan (Dhs1,829) by
Brooks Brothers.
The black cashmere
turtleneck is a perfect
garment (cf Horst, Avedon,
Irving Penn, et al.). It
accentuates the jawline, or, in
its absence, suggests it and,
by extension, character.
DAVI D MAMET
MARCH 1996
Cashmere turtleneck sweater
(Dhs826) by Joseph Abboud.
SPRI NG 1986
jahs (and this is no romance) with jodhpurs for spectator wear at polo games, and
since have become an essential part of mens wardrobes. Unlined, with crepe soles,
they are one of the most comfortable shoes known to man.
From left: By Johnston & Murphy (Dhs515); Mark McNairy New Amsterdam (Dhs1,278); Brunello Cucinelli (Dhs3,345).
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Chukka shoes, of ankle-high reverse calf, were originally worn by Indian Mahara-
APR.
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JANUARY 1981
PASS EVEN THE MOST
CASUAL DAYS IN STYLE
YOULL FIND YOU GO
MILES IN COMFORT AND
GOOD LOOKS.
THE GREAT-
COATSTRIKES
THE PERFECT
BALANCE
BETWEEN
SWAGGER AND
DIGNITY.
IN THE COMPARATIVELY
BRIEF TIME SINCE IT WAS
INTRODUCED IN THIS
COUNTRY, THE CAFTAN
HAS ESTABLISHED
ITSELF AS ONE OF THE
MOST PRACTICAL AND
ATTRACTIVE ARTICLES OF
LEISUREWEAR.
JUNE 1972
OCTOBER 1 972
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6 ESQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUU QQQQUU QQUUUU Q RRE RRE RE RRE RE RREE R IIRRE I E IRE IRE IIR II E IIRE RE IIIRR IR IR DECEMBER
GOOD FASHIONS ALWAYS
ESCHEWED THE SUPERFLUOUS
THE FANCY BACK, THE
LEATHER BUTTONS, THE ZOOT
EFFECT. TAKE, FOR EXAMPLE,
THIS WELL-STYLED OVERCOAT.
THE PLAIN SLEEVES, MODERATE
LENGTH AND SIMPLE STYLE
WERE ACCEPTED AS GOOD
TASTE LONG BEFORE THE
CONSERVATION CREW MADE
THEM COMPULSORY.
FEBRUARY 1944
On Omar Hernandez: Double-
breasted wool-blend coat
(Dhs7,145) by Dolce & Gabbana;
wool turtleneck sweater
(Dhs510) by Tommy Hilfiger;
wool trousers (Dhs550) by DKNY;
leather boots (Dhs3,489) by
Gucci; leather gloves (Dhs2,005)
by Giorgio Armani.
Scarpe da morto, the Italians call our
clunky black business kicks: the shoes
of the dead. The idea that unadorned
lace-ups and heavily brogued and
inelegant wing tips are only good
enough to be buried in. While that
sentiment definitely goes a bit too far
(theres nothing wrong with a fine,
all-American shoe when its worn
with a fine, all-American suit), there
is something to be said about a little
panache where the feet meet the street.
WHILE
TEMPERATURES HAVE
BEEN REACHING FOR
NEW HEIGHTSTHE
BIG FACT IS
THATCLOTHING
NOW WEIGHS LESS
THAN EVER BEFORE.
AUGUST 1950
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WHILE WE FIRMLY BELIEVE THAT A MAN SHOULD TIE HIS BOW TIE HIMSELF, WE
ARE NOT STUPID. KEEP THIS UNDER YOUR HAT WE HAVE A BACKUP PRE-TIED
NUMBER STASHED AWAY FOR THOSE RUBBER-FINGERED, WEVE-GOT-TO-BE-ON
THE-DAIS-IN-FIVE-MINUTES EMERGENCIES. BUT HERES THE DEAL: WE WEAR IT ONLY
WITH A STRAIGHT-COLLAR SHIRT SO THERES NO WAY ANYONE CAN SEE THAT ITS A
PHONY (WHICH ONE WOULD IF IT WERE WORN WITH A WING COLLAR), AND
WE ROUGH IT UP SOME TO MAKE IT LOOK LESS THAN PERFECT. IF ANYONES NOTICED
OUR LITTLE TRICK, HE HASNT LET ON.
Cotton evening shirt (Dhs716) and silk bow tie (Dhs220) by Thomas Pink; metal cuff links (Dhs132) by Massimo Dutti.
DECEMBER 1997
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Old-line wisdom: a black-
tie evening is so special you
dont want to know when
its going to end. Hence, a
watch, my good man, is an
inappropriate, unnecessary
accessory. The more
modern, better wisdom: the
open bar goes cash at nine,
and you gotta know when to
get that last free cocktail. Go
ahead strap on a ticker.
Preferably something with
a black leather band thats
slim and sophisticated.
White-gold Altiplano watch
(Dhs62,445) by Piaget.
DECEMBER 1997
AUTUMN 2006 DECEMBER 1997 AUGUST 1951
AMID THE MURKINESS OF
THE NEW RULES OF BLACK
TIE, WE SUGGEST THAT
BLACK TIE DOESNT NEED
TO BE BLACK AT ALL, BUT
MIDNIGHT BLUE
A CUMMERBUNDMAY
SEEM UNNECESSARY, BUT
WE LIKE IT FOR THE TRIM,
FINISHED APPEARANCE IT
PROVIDES. AND REMEMBER:
IT AINT A GIRDLE.
NEWEST THING UNDER
THE MIDNIGHT SUN
IS THE SILK DINNER
JACKET. COOL AS ICED
CHAMPAGNE AND VERY
HANDSOME. SPRI NG 1984
CUMMERBUNDS
ARE NO LONGER
JUST AN
ACCESSORY WITH
TUXEDO TROUSERS
ANY LENGTH OF
FABRIC WRAPPED
AND TUCKED AT
THE WAIST WILL
WORK FOR FORMAL
OR CASUAL
SASH-AYING.
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NOTHING ELSE IN A MANS
WARDROBE WAS EVER AS
STYLISH AS CASUAL AND
YET AS DRESSY AS THE
GREY FLANNEL SUIT. IT WAS
GIVEN THE IMPRIMATUR OF
THE CHIC OF THE MEN WHO
WORE IT (JOCK WHITNEY,
ALFRED VANDERBILT JR.,
MEN LIKE THAT, MEN WHO
COULD AFFORD SHOOTING
BOXES IN SCOTLAND, AND,
ABOVE ALL AND WITH
MATCHLESS GRACE, FRED
ASTAIRE) AND THE UTTER
POSH OF THE PLACES
WHERE THEY WERE SEEN
IN IT: THE POLO MATCHES
ON LONG ISLAND PLAYING
FIELD, ON WALL STREET, IN
SANCTIFIED MENS CLUBS
JULY 1972
On Olivier van Themsche:
Two-button wool flannel
suit (Dhs5,123) by Calvin
Klein Collection; cotton
shirt (Dhs330) by Massimo
Dutti; silk tie (Dhs495)
by Thomas Pink; leather
monk-straps (Dhs1,268)
by Allen Edmonds; cotton
pocket square (Dhs156) by
Paul Stuart; leather belt
(Dhs405) by Churchs.
AS FOR YOUR
TROUSERS, MAKE SURE
THEYRE CUT TO BREAK
ON YOUR SHOE. WE SEE
TOO MANY MEN WITH
PANTS SO SHORT THEY
COULD WADE THROUGH
THE PUNCH BOWL.
DECEMBER 1 997
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PHOTOGRAPHS BY DAVI D TI TLOW / FASHI ON BY CATHERI NE HAYWARD
1
Charcoal wool double-breasted coat, Dhs10,608, by Ralph Lauren
Black Label. Navy merino wool polo shirt, Dhs769, by John Smedley.
Charcoal wool pinstripe trousers, Dhs7,065, by Polo Ralph Lauren.
Black leather shoes, Dhs2,749, by JMWeston
THIS SEASON S TAILORING IS SLEEK, SUBTLE
AND SOPHISTICATED.
NO FRILLS
A BIT LIKE THE INCREDIBLY URBANE BILL NIGHY
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 6 1
Grey wool suit, Dhs9,987;
pale blue cotton shirt, Dhs1,659,
both by Ermenegildo Zegna
1 6 2 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
3
Grey wool coat, Dhs9,822; grey wool suit,
Dhs10,395; white cotton shirt, Dhs1,985; navy silk
knitted tie, Dhs679, all by Dolce &Gabbana.
Black calf leather loafers, Dhs1,979, by Churchs
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 6 3
4
Grey wool double-breasted coat, Dhs2,629; grey wool
houndstooth trousers, Dhs561, both by PS by Paul Smith.
Grey wool knitted polo shirt, Dhs1,004, by
Paul Smith London
1 6 4 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE 1 6 5
5
Grey textured wool coat, Dhs10,637;
white cotton shirt, Dhs2,275; grey
checked wool trousers, Dhs2,541, all by
Louis Vuitton. Oxblood calf leather
loafers, Dhs1,979, by Churchs
1 6 6 ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
Grey wool coat, Dhs10,755; blue cotton
shirt, Dhs1,625, both by
Giorgio Armani
DECEMBER 2013 ESQUIRE
Grey wool coat, Dhs18,705; blue cotton shirt, Dhs1,654, both by Prada
ESQUIRE DECEMBER 2013
8
Grey wool jacket, Dhs1,566; grey wool
trousers, Dhs769; white cotton shirt,
Dhs443, all by Jigsaw. Oxblood calf
leather loafers, Dhs1,979, by Churchs
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