067 Jack Diary
067 Jack Diary
“He seems very importunate, sir. I have never seen him so eager. I
don’t know but what, if you don’t see him soon, he will have one of his
violent fits.” I knew the man would not have said this without some
cause, so I said: “All right; I’ll go now”; and I asked the others to wait a
few minutes for me, as I had to go and see my “patient.”
“Take me with you, friend John,” said the Professor. “His case in your
diary interest me much, and it had bearing, too, now and again on
our case. I should much like to see him, and especial when his mind is
disturbed.”
“Me too?” said Quincey Morris. “May I come?” said Harker. I nodded,
and we all went down the passage together.
I think we were all staggered. For my own part, I was under the
conviction, despite my knowledge of the man’s character and history,
that his reason had been restored; and I felt under a strong impulse to
tell him that I was satisfied as to his sanity, and would see about the
necessary formalities for his release in the morning. I thought it better
to wait, however, before making so grave a statement, for of old I knew
the sudden changes to which this particular patient was liable. So I
contented myself with making a general statement that he appeared to
be improving very rapidly; that I would have a longer chat with him in
the morning, and would then see what I could do in the direction of
JOHN SEWARD, M.D.
meeting his wishes. This did not at all satisfy him, for he said quickly:—
“But I fear, Dr. Seward, that you hardly apprehend my wish. I desire to
go at once—here—now—this very hour—this very moment, if I may.
Time presses, and in our implied agreement with the old scytheman
it is of the essence of the contract. I am sure it is only necessary to
put before so admirable a practitioner as Dr. Seward so simple, yet
so momentous a wish, to ensure its fulfilment.” He looked at me
keenly, and seeing the negative in my face, turned to the others, and
scrutinised them closely. Not meeting any sufficient response, he went
on:—
“You have,” I said frankly, but at the same time, as I felt, brutally. There
was a considerable pause, and then he said slowly:—
“Can you not tell frankly your real reason for wishing to be free to-
night? I will undertake that if you will satisfy even me—a stranger,
JOHN SEWARD, M.D.
without prejudice, and with the habit of keeping an open mind—Dr.
Seward will give you, at his own risk and on his own responsibility,
the privilege you seek.” He shook his head sadly, and with a look of
poignant regret on his face. The Professor went on:—
As, however, I got near the door, a new change came over the patient.
He moved towards me so quickly that for the moment I feared that
he was about to make another homicidal attack. My fears, however,
were groundless, for he held up his two hands imploringly, and made
his petition in a moving manner. As he saw that the very excess of his
emotion was militating against him, by restoring us more to our old
relations, he became still more demonstrative. I glanced at Van Helsing,
and saw my conviction reflected in his eyes; so I became a little more
fixed in my manner, if not more stern, and motioned to him that his
efforts were unavailing. I had previously seen something of the same
constantly growing excitement in him when he had to make some
request of which at the time he had thought much, such, for instance,
as when he wanted a cat; and I was prepared to see the collapse into
the same sullen acquiescence on this occasion. My expectation was not
JOHN SEWARD, M.D.
realised, for, when he found that his appeal would not be successful, he
got into quite a frantic condition. He threw himself on his knees, and
held up his hands, wringing them in plaintive supplication, and poured
forth a torrent of entreaty, with the tears rolling down his cheeks, and
his whole face and form expressive of the deepest emotion:—
“Let me entreat you, Dr. Seward, oh, let me implore you, to let me
out of this house at once. Send me away how you will and where you
will; send keepers with me with whips and chains; let them take me
in a strait-waistcoat, manacled and leg-ironed, even to a gaol; but let
me go out of this. You don’t know what you do by keeping me here. I
am speaking from the depths of my heart—of my very soul. You don’t
know whom you wrong, or how; and I may not tell. Woe is me! I may
not tell. By all you hold sacred—by all you hold dear—by your love
that is lost—by your hope that lives—for the sake of the Almighty, take
me out of this and save my soul from guilt! Can’t you hear me, man?
Can’t you understand? Will you never learn? Don’t you know that I am
sane and earnest now; that I am no lunatic in a mad fit, but a sane man
fighting for his soul? Oh, hear me! hear me! Let me go! let me go! let
me go!”
I thought that the longer this went on the wilder he would get, and so
would bring on a fit; so I took him by the hand and raised him up.
“Come,” I said sternly, “no more of this; we have had quite enough
already. Get to your bed and try to behave more discreetly.”
When I was leaving the room, last of our party, he said to me in a quiet,
well-bred voice:—
“You will, I trust, Dr. Seward, do me the justice to bear in mind, later
on, that I did what I could to convince you to-night.”