LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

CURRICULUM

CalWORKs

Los Angeles County

Department of Mental Health

CalWORKs Supportive Services

 SUCCESS LADDER

My Career Goal

EDUCATION
CAREER

Entry Level Job

 LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

CURRICULUM

Developed by

CalWORKs Program Administration

County of Los Angeles Department of Mental Health

 LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP
CURRICULUM

CONTENTS

Purpose ix

The Right Frame of Mind

Module 1A: Attitude …………………………………………………. 1

Module1B: Motivation ……………………………………… … 4

Module 1C: Responsibility………………………………………….. 9

How to Handle the Tough Stuff

Module 2A: Conflict Resolution……………………………………...14

Module 2B: Dealing with Anger……………………….…………… 18

Module 2C: Stress Reduction……………………………………..... 23

How to Put Your Best Foot Forward

Module 3A: Communication/Non-Verbal…………………………. 30

Module 3B: Communication/Verbal…………………………… 35

Module 3C: Communication/Interview……………………….........39

 contents

The Nuts and Bolts

Module 4A: Money Management……………………………… … 43

Module 4B: Time Management……………………………… ……48

Module 4C: Decision Making…………………………………….. 53

The Balancing Act

Module 5A: Setting Priorities…………………………………… …58

Module 5B: Home/Work/School………………… …………..62

Module 5C: Family/Friends/Myself………………………… …… 67

Time to Act/
Stop Procrastinating

Module 6A: My Personal Plan………………………… …………. 73

Module 6B: Design a Resume…………………………………… .76

Module 6C: Bring in the Speakers…………………………….. 78

Appendix Instructor’s Guide to the Six Modules………….…79

Suggested Readings…………………………………………………….98
 LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

CURRICULUM

PURPOSE:

CalWORKs Life Skills Support Groups combine the objectives of removing

mental health barriers to employment with exercises that promote practical
outcomes. Participants will learn coping strategies to deal with their
emotional concerns, and gain knowledge about the culture of the work
environment. Personal strengths will be identified in dealing with stress-
related issues. Participants can expect to become empowered to pursue
educational/employment goals while improving in the area of general life
skills.

This will be an open-entry and open-exit group, which will meet two hours
every week for six weeks.

The target population is CalWORKs participants who are identified by their

treatment provider as not being fully ready for the mainstream WtW
program activities, but are ready to work on life skills that may better
prepare them for employment.

ix
The Right Frame of Mind
MODULE 1A

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

ATTITUDE

GOAL: This module is designed to help participants overcome

barriers in thinking that prevent them from moving
forward. Participants will learn to identify and correct
negative views that lead to unproductive behavior.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• recognize negative thinking patterns

• understand how thinking is related to behavior
• have more control over negative behavior

MATERIALS: Handouts: Attitude is Key, Examples of Negative

Thoughts

*This module selection (attitude) requires an LMHA Staff to conduct group

1
Module 1A

ATTITUDE IS KEY!
AS A MAN THINKETH SO IS HE

In order to gain more control over our emotions and behavior, we can become
more aware of the negative destructive thoughts that enter our minds almost
habitually. These negative thoughts have the power to control how we feel and
how we process information in deciding how to behave.

The good news is that while we typically cannot control the way we feel about a
person or a matter, we can control our thoughts! This becomes significant when
we need to change the way we respond to certain situations.

The behaviors and feelings that we most often want to change are the ones that
have negative consequences tied to them. High intensity feelings like rage, envy,
sadness, and guilt can be debilitating, particularly if experienced often.

Let’s look at an example where our feelings can change in response to a change in
our thinking pattern.

EXAMPLE: A neighborhood fire breaks out and three family homes are
burned down. There was no loss of life, but one woman who
lost her home grieved so much she ended up in the hospital for
stress-related illness.

What happened to the other homeowners? How did they

manage to survive the fire without needing medical care?

In this narration, the other fire victims were relieved that there
was no loss of life and that everyone in their family was safe.
While they had normal feelings of grief and loss they managed
to look toward building their lives again.

2
Module 1A

EXAMPLES OF NEGATIVE THOUGHTS AND

HOW THEY MAKE YOU FEEL AND ACT

Please add examples of negative thoughts and their consequences:

Negative thoughts/attitude Feelings Behavior

1. I am stupid Sadness Avoid learning

2. I can’t do anything right Overwhelmed Won’t try
3. I must be perfect Tense/No Joy Limiting
4. I can’t trust people Suspicious Avoid others
5. I am afraid Fear Won’t live life
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

3
MODULE 1B

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

MOTIVATION

GOALS: This module helps participants get started toward taking

positive actions in their life. They will be able to set career
related goals and reward themselves for making small steps.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• identify barriers and concerns that prevent taking action

• discover meaning in their life—what drives them to want to
improve
• set self-reward system for each accomplishment

MATERIALS: Handouts: Motivation, Things That Interfere, My Life Has

Meaning, Things I Really Enjoy

4
Module 1B

MOTIVATION

There are just some things that are hard to get motivated for, things like

house cleaning, shopping, paying bills etc. Yet motivation is the wood

that sets our lives aflame with meaning and focus. It keeps us going

when the going gets tough. It “turns us on!” Have you thought about

the things, people, places, situations that motivate you? Motivation is

best when it comes from inside you, and you don’t have to have

someone else motivating you. You do it because you want to. There

may be only a few things that motivate you, but what ever they are they

are powerful igniters. If you can find out what motivates a child for

example, you can get that child to perform duties that otherwise would

be difficult. If you are no longer motivated to act or accomplish

something in your life, you may be discouraged, tired, or depressed. Be

encouraged, it only takes a small fire to kindle a dream or pursuit! Once

you tap into that thing that stirs your interests, and desires, you will find

that it stayed there waiting on you. Just pick it up and start off where

you left off.

5
MODULE 1B

THINGS THAT INTERFERE WITH MY GOALS

1. I have trouble taking the first step.

2. I need childcare.

3. I did not finish high school.

4. I am too old to go back to school.

5. I don’t know where to start.

6. I don’t have support.

7. I need clothes.

8. I don’t know salary to ask for.

9. I don’t have transportation.

10. I lack basic work skills.

11. I had a bad experience with my last job.

12. I am not physically able to work.

13. I want to wait until my kids are in school.

14. Other…………………………………….

6
MODULE 1B
MY LIFE HAS MEANING WHEN

I CAN……………………………………………….

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

I HAVE……………………………………………….

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

I WOULD BE MORE SATISFIED WITH MY LIFE IF

I COULD………………………………………………….

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

7
MODULE 1B

THINGS I REALLY ENJOY DOING

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

IF I HAD TO REWARD MYSELF FOR DOING

SOMETHING WELL

I WOULD………………………………………………

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

8
MODULE 1C

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

RESPONSIBILITY

GOALS: This module helps participants gain a sense of control

over life outcomes by making informed choices. They
will learn the value of admitting past mistakes. The
consequences of decision-making will be highlighted.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• identify barriers to achieving past goals and come up

with new remedies
• become more comfortable in making decisions
• accept credit and rewards for what is done well while
admitting mistakes

MATERIALS: Handouts: Responsibility, Barriers in My

Past/Present, Making Better Choices

9
Module 1C

RESPONSIBILITY

Have you noticed that few people want to take responsibility these

days? There is trash on the front side walk. Who picks it up? You

often hear, it’s not my job! No, it’s not your job, but you live there

and it may reflect poorly on you. Not taking responsibility for

what goes undone is one thing, but if you don’t take responsibility

for your life decisions you will pay. Just the thought of taking on

one more responsibility is perhaps tiring to most people who are

already over stressed with family and work duties. But, there is

one positive way to think about it: being more responsible can also

mean taking more control over what happens to you. The more

you can determine the positive things in your life the more you will

have them. If you leave control in the hands of someone else, or in

the hands of the “system,” you will no doubt find the outcome may

not be what you want. So one way of getting more of what you

want from life is to make sure that the outcome turns out in your

favor. Take the responsibility!

10
Module 1C

BARRIERS IN MY PAST

List some of the things, situations, or people that have hindered you in the
past from achieving your goals.

1.

2.

3.

4.

BARRIERS IN MY PRESENT

There are things, situations or people that are currently interfering with you
reaching your goals.

1.

2.

3.

4.

11
MODULE 1C: Conti.

MAKING BETTER CHOICES

Most mistakes in the past can be attributed to making poor choices. The
good thing about past failures is the opportunity to learn from them. We
learn what not to do, who to trust and why. We also learn that more help or
information may be needed next time.

SOME THINGS I HAVE LEARNED FROM PAST

MISTAKES

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

WHEN I SUCCEED AT A GOAL I PLAN TO REWARD

MYSELF BY

1.

2.

3.

12
Module 1C: Conti.

ADDRESSING SUBSTANCE USE/ABUSE ISSUES

The art of making good choices and informed decisions is not an

easy task. It takes time and thought. One has to consider how our

actions affect others. Substance use alters one’s ability to process

information and make responsible action plans. Often things done

under the influence of drugs or alcohol can have long term effects.

THINGS THAT I REGRET DONE UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF

DRUGS OR ALCOHOL

1.

2.

3.

THINGS I CAN DO OR SAY TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY

ACTIONS UNDER THE INFLUENCE

1.

2.

3.

13
How to Handle the Tough Stuff
MODULE 2A

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

GOAL: This module is designed to help participants reduce

conflict in relationships. They will learn techniques to
help negotiate what they want.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• recognize how words and behavior can impact others

• learn at least one effective technique for managing
negative behaviors
• develop strategies for dealing with difficult people
and situations

MATERIALS: Handouts: Techniques For Managing Negative

Behavior, Making “I” statements,” My Personal Strategy
for Dealing With Difficult…”

14
MODULE 2A

TECHNIQUES FOR MANAGING NEGATIVE

BEHAVIOR

We can best manage our behavior in conflicts by exercising some of the

following techniques:

1. Try to focus on the facts and figure out what the other person actually
said or did.

2. Don’t talk before you are prepared to respond in a reasonable way.

3. Demonstrate continued good will by saying that you want to work

things out.

4. Make sure that you have given your side and opinion accurately.

5. If necessary ask a mutually respected person to mediate.

6. Stay flexible; be open to change your mind after you hear more from
the other side.

7. Don’t fight the small stuff; figure out if the issue is important enough
to pursue resolution.

8. Set another time to continue the talks if you feel you are not being
understood.

9. Don’t involve others who have nothing to do with the conflict.

10. Try not to over rehearse your anger before addressing the issue.

15
Module 2A
MAKING “I” STATEMENTS

The use of “I” statements (owning your own thoughts) helps to avoid
criticizing or placing blame on others. Taking responsibility for what we
understand, even if we are wrong, reduces defensiveness in those we are
interacting with. Below are examples of “I” statements. The first statement
is less inflammatory than the second statement. Practice making more “I”
statements in your interactions.

Examples:

1. I would like to talk more.

You don’t let me talk!

2. I am bothered by your being late.

You come in here late all of the time!

3. I am concerned about your drinking habits.

You drink too much!

4. I worry that something may happen to you when you stay out late.
You could care less how I feel when you stay out late!

5. I am angry when I feel that you don’t care.

You don’t care about me!

6. I am disappointed over not receiving that last promotion.

You did not give me the promotion I wanted!

7. I am afraid that I won’t be able to please you.

No one will ever be able to please you!

16
MODULE 2A

MY PERSONAL STRATEGY FOR DEALING WITH

DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND DIFFICULT
SITUATIONS

Think of a situation or person that you are dealing with or have dealt with
that has been problematic. How would you deal with the issue based upon
what you have learned from this module?

The problem What not to do Ways to resolve

17
MODULE 2B

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

DEALING WITH ANGER

GOAL: This module is designed to deal with anger before it gets

out of control. Participants should be prepared to
identify areas of sensitivity that tend to trigger an angry
response.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• identify the physical effects of anger on the body

• see things from the view of others
• know when to remove oneself from the scene
• reframe from over-personalizing

MATERIALS: Handouts: Anger, Make a list of Times When Anger Got

You in Trouble, What Makes You Angry, Things I Can
Do to Cope Better

18
Module 2B

ANGER

Anger is an emotion that helps to preserve the species. In years past, when
humans had to live beside wild animals and learn to survive in a more
hostile physical environment, the arousal of certain emotions like anger and
fear was critical to survival. When strong emotions are aroused, the
sympathetic nervous system is activated. It is also known as the “fight or
flight” response. In the case of fear, our human biology was programmed to
run from harm, and in the case of anger, we were programmed to fight.

Although we no longer have to exist in hostile physical environments, these

intense arousal signals may still dominate our being. The problem is, a
response of “fight or flight,” may not be the appropriate one in the civilized
world, and indeed, in the case of “fight,” may get you in big trouble! So
how do we manage these intense emotional responses that our old biology is
programmed for?

Managing anger is an important and necessary skill in coping with life

events. We can no longer just run away or fight our way through a
threatening situation. For some, anger is a learned response in dealing with
stress. When anger becomes a habitual response, it is very difficult to
change this pattern of behavior. Some times it requires outside help from
professionals in the mental health field. The good news is that this behavior
pattern can change by learning better coping skills. Below are some tips and
general guidelines for dealing with anger:

• Deliberately choose to remain calm by thinking rather than

responding.
• Don’t hold in frustrations until they build up. Speak up in an assertive
manner to get your point across.
• If you feel overwhelmed, remove yourself from the scene and return
to the matter when you feel more in control.
• Try to build up reserves by sleeping and eating well and doing things
that you enjoy.

19
Module 2B

MAKE A LIST OF TIMES WHEN ANGER GOT YOU

IN TROUBLE

WHEN YOU SAID OR DID THINGS

THAT YOU NOW REGRET

In pairs discuss the situation:

Include who the person was. Describe the situation and what you said or
did. What was the reaction or consequence from your anger? Why do you
regret what happened

PERSON SITUATION OUTCOME REGRET

1.

3.

4.

20
Module 2B

WHAT MAKES YOU ANGRY?

List Your Triggers:

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

21
Module 2B

THINGS I CAN DO OR CHANGE TO COPE BETTER

WITH MY ANGER

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

22
MODULE 2C

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

STRESS REDUCTION

GOAL: This module is designed to help participants deal with

stress in their daily living. They will learn stress
reduction techniques that meet their personal style and
comfort.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• list potential areas of stress in their lives

• learn how to use relaxation techniques
• develop a healthy eating and exercise plan
• identify possible supports in their environment

MATERIAL: Handouts: Stress Reduction, Relaxation, Exercise, Eating

Right, Eating Right Reduces Stress, Things To Put In My
Stress-Quake Bag

23
Module 2C

STRESS REDUCTION

In today’s world who has been able to escape the effects of stress? Perhaps
there are some good things to say about stress, but one has to really think
hard to come up with it. One thing we know that when we are under stress,
it sure feels good when the stress is relieved! The problem is, it goes away
to return again another day. Life on the planet inevitably means we have to
deal with stress. What matters then, is how we chose to deal with it. Yes,
we have some choice. We can let it grow bigger, by not attending to it, and
end up with more stress, or we can tackle it before it escalates.

There are a number of things we can do to prepare for stress and navigate
through it once it is upon us. Preparing for stressful times may be as simple
as having an earthquake bag prepared. Instead of an earthquake, we are
preparing for a stress quake. What do we put in the bag? Perhaps we should
start with things that have a calming effect upon you. How about a nice
luxury bath with everything arranged and ready to be pulled out when
needed? You could have your favorite magazines ready for that time when
you don’t want to think about the problems anymore and you just want to
fade into a good book or magazine. Put that in the bag. Another suggestion
would be to find your favorite photos and have them ready to pull out and
enjoy in the quiet of an evening. These can bring fond memories of a time
perhaps less stressful. There may be friends that are soothing and able to
offer a good word, or sound advice; put a reminder of that person’s
telephone number in your bag. There must be more things you can think of
that helps to settle your nerves, during stressful times. Jot it down and place
in your stress-quake bag for times of emergencies. Mark “open with care.”

Traditionally, we know that there are relaxation and breathing exercises that
also help with stress reduction. Don’t forget the part that exercise plays in
the form of a walk. Lastly, eating right can us build reserves when our
bodies are tired or weary. There are things to do to combat stress, and just
knowing that somehow feels good. To not do anything, is a poor choice.

24
Module 2C

RELAXATION

We know that it is good for us to take time to relax, but we

often don’t know how to go about it if we have only a few
precious minutes during the day. When we feel stressed, it
is good to know some ways of relaxing. A good relaxation
exercise is designed to help our bodies relax and reduce
stress. Below, is an exercise of relaxation that can be done
at work or when you can catch a few minutes in your day.
Breathing: It is important to breathe fully, from your stomach and
not from your chest. In order to make sure you rare
breathing from your stomach, place one hand on your
stomach and the other on your chest. Notice where your
breathing originates; begin deep breathing exercises from
the stomach.
Loosen Muscles: We may not be aware of muscle tightness in various parts
of our bodies. In order to increase awareness and to
know how to loosen tight muscles, it is recommended
that we first tighten each muscle and then release the
muscle.

Relax The Mind: It is helpful to take your mind off the stressors that you
may be facing by relaxing your thoughts. It is typically
recommended that you concentrate on a pleasant scene,
one that is soothing and relaxing. Take a few minutes to
concentrate on this positive image.

25
MODULE 2C

EXERCISE

Questions to answer before you begin:

(1): Think of different ways you would like to exercise if you could find the
time; would it be biking, walking, jogging, swimming, or athletic games?

(A): Would you prefer to have a partner or go solo?

(B): What time of the day fits best with your schedule?

(C): Do you have any medical considerations?

(D): How long would you exercise (minutes/hours)?

Where would you exercise?

Lastly, in viewing your calendar and considering your health when do you
think you could begin?

Remember, walking has been generally a safe way to begin an exercise

program, if you have not had an established routine.

(2): Exercise not only helps our bodies to be stronger and function better, it
is also a good stress reducer. Science has pointed out that we have opiate
receptors in the brain that when released by exercise, makes us feel good;
these hormones are called endorphins. These natural opiates are released in
response to pain and vigorous exercise. They are jokingly called a “natural
high.” Some people keep exercising in order to feel good from this
endorphin release. This explains the “runners high,” and the indifference to
pain some injured athlete’s have.

26
Module 2C

EATING RIGHT

Like relaxation and exercise, eating right is important for overall health and
stress reduction. Our bodies are energized by the right kind of food, and we
can often ward off some ailments with good eating choices. There are some
differences in food preference that may be determined by ethnicity and
culture. It is therefore important to design a good nutritional plan around
foods that are not only healthy but also tailored to individual taste buds.

Food has many meanings that we learn as early as childhood, and some of
these traditions have not served us well in our adulthood. For example, we
are told “Eat everything on your plate, kids are starving in other countries.”
While this advice meant well, it very well could contribute to overeating.

As a nation, Americans are experiencing a rise in the rate of obesity, and

related health concerns such as type 2 diabetes. Conversely, we are a culture
that promotes standards of beauty based upon youthfulness and slim figures.
More pressure is placed on females to conform to this standard at younger
ages. At the same time we have exploded in our offerings of junk food.
Fast food eating establishments can be found on almost every corner of
some neighborhoods. We are indeed in a conflict with our messages and
reality when it comes to food.

In relation to stress levels, a proper diet can be an important key to feeling

better. Sleeping better and eating properly will help our bodies to function
better.

27
Module 2C

ADDRESSING SUBSTANCE USE/ABUSE ISSUES

Stress is an unpleasant experience and it requires that we do something to

relieve it. Sometimes we try to ignore problems and at other times we may

prematurely jump in and try to fix it. When drugs or alcohol enter the

picture, the results are often more problematic. Escaping from our problems

through altering our state of consciousness is a way of not dealing with the

issues of life directly. When we are under the influence of drugs or alcohol

we may feel better temporarily, but soon when the effects wear off, we find

that he problem is still there. Perhaps under the influence we have said or

done something that makes it worse; affecting our relationships,

employment, our health, and finances. We may even incur legal problems

that carry long term implications.

TIMES WHEN I HAVE USED ALCOHOL OR DRUGS TO DEAL WITH

STRESS

1.

2.

3.

4.

28
Module 2C

THINGS TO PUT INTO MY STRESS-QUAKE BAG

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

29
How to Put Your Best Foot
Forward
MODULE 3A

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FOWARD

COMMUNICATION
NON-VERBAL

GOAL: This module teaches how to make good impressions; a

valuable skill in the workplace. Participants will
discover the impact of first impressions and how not to
stumble into giving false impressions.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• understand the power of image

• learn to read body language
• identify the impression they would like to make

MATERIALS: Handouts: Non-verbal’s: You Are Seen Before Heard,

A Non-Verbal Sizing Up! Role Play Exercises with
Body Language Speaks

30
Module 3A

NON-VERBALS
YOU ARE SEEN BEFORE HEARD

Some people do not stop to think how they appear to others. They sort of
go along their merry way and handle different social situations the same,
without much thought. However, there are times when we need to be more
thoughtful in how we are projecting ourselves. Often people make snap
judgments about others and their first impressions are not easily changed.
There are circumstances when it is to our advantage to make the best
impression that we possibly can. In instances where we are competing for
a special outcome, like employment; we need to be cognizant of how we
want others to view us. Your success may make the difference between
obtaining housing or paying some important debt. In such instances, it is
important for you to put your best foot forward.

First of all, you want to project a good overall appearance, which includes
your dress, your walk, your manner of greeting, your make-up, your
accessories and your hair. Remember, before you are heard you are seen.
Impressions are quickly formed. If you need to work on any of these
visuals, try them out with a trusted friend who will give you honest
feedback. Your mirror can also help here if you have an objective eye.

Secondly, become aware of your “typical” facial expression. This is the

expression you carry when you are not thinking about it. Does it convey
boredom? Do you look distracted? Is your expression angry, sullen or
confused? See yourself as others see you. Once you know your typical
style, you decide if you need to change. It may determine whether you are
successful or not. Remember, during an interview you don’t want to
overdo facial expressions by smiling too much, or looking too stern.

Thirdly, look at any mannerisms that you may have. Many are bad habits
and are practiced without your awareness. Distracting mannerisms may be
things like too many hand gestures, licking your lips, sucking your teeth, or
gum chewing, head scratching, toe tapping, and leg shaking.

31
Module 3A Cont.

Establishing eye contact is also important and you may want to practice
making good eye contact. It is usually a good idea to maintain eye contact
without staring at the person you are talking to. A lack of eye contact may
convey timidity or lack of interest.

Lastly, check out the personal space that is usually put between you and the
person you are talking to. Different cultures may have different spatial
distances were they are comfortable communicating. Most typical
Americans stand between 30 and 36 inches apart. Remember not to invade
someone’s personal space. If you do, they will tend to step back. If they
step back, don’t close in further, or you may find yourselves waltzing
around the room! In summary, keep your eyes open for the non-verbals!

32
Module 3A

A NON-VERBAL SIZING UP!

(1): Think of times when you correctly sized someone up without them
talking to you directly.

SITUATION PERSON OBSERVED

(2): Think of times when you incorrectly sized someone up, and had to
change your mind.

SITUATION PERSON OBSERVED CHANGED

33
Module 3A

BODY LANGUAGE SPEAKS

Have participants role play pre-selected scenarios (such as role playing a

bored person, an angry person, a lazy person etc.), without informing the
group, and the group will guess what the non-verbal message conveyed.

Suggestions:

Role-plays a scared communicator

Role-play a bored communicator

Role-plays an angry communicator

Role-plays a naïve communicator

Role-plays a suspicious communicator

Role-plays a nervous communicator

34
MODULE 3B

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD

COMMUNICATION
VERBAL

GOAL: This module emphasizes the value of good verbal

communication. Participants will sharpen their listening
skills and learn to make appropriate “I” statements. As a
result of this training, there should be an increase in
understanding in normal dialogs.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• practice skills that increase their ability to be

understood and to understand what others are saying
• take responsibility for conveying messages more
accurately
• ask for clarification when needed

MATERIALS: Handouts: Verbal Communication, Making “I”

statements, Communication Skills

35
 Module 3B

VERBAL COMMUNICATION

Basic Rules of Engagement:

• Good speakers do not have to be great orators. They do need to listen.

They do not cut others off. They answer questions appropriately.

• Good verbal skills begin with good manners: We say excuse me, thank
you, good morning, I’m sorry, see you later, may I, please and thank you.

• Having eye contact, showing interest in what the other person is saying,
asking for clarification, and speaking honestly, enhances good verbal
skills.

• Good verbal skills are nice to listen to. The voice is not too loud or too
low. The words are not spoken too fast. There is no bad attitude in the
speech of the speaker.

• Good verbal skills do not require a big vocabulary. Simply getting one’s
point across in a manner that is easily understood is all it takes.

36
Module 3B
MAKING “I” STATEMENTS

The use of “I” statements (owning your own thoughts) helps to avoid
criticizing or placing blame on others. Taking responsibility for what we
understand, even if we are wrong, reduces defensiveness in those we are
interacting with. Below are examples of “I” statements. The first statement
is less inflammatory than the second statement. Practice making more “I”
statements.

Examples:

1. I would like to talk more.

You don’t let me talk!

8. I am bothered by your frequent lateness.

You come in here late all of the time!

9. I am concerned about your drinking habits.

You drink too much!

10. I worry that something may happen to you when you stay out late.
You could care less how I feel when you stay out late!

11. I am angry when I feel that you don’t care.

You don’t care about me!

12. I am disappointed over not receiving that last promotion.

You did not give me the promotion I wanted!

13. I am afraid that I won’t be able to please you.

No one will ever be able to please you!

37
Module 3B

COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Possible Topics for Discussion

• Conversation starters
• How to listen attentively
• How to let someone know in a nice way that you’re not interested in
talking to them.
• How to speak in a calm tone of voice
• How to initiate a conversation with a stranger
• How to ask for help/directions/assistance
• How to keep the conversation going
• How to end a conversation
• How to give constructive criticism or feedback
• How to respond to criticism or negative feedback
• How to disagree respectfully
• How to assert your point of view
• How to voice dissatisfaction
• How to ask the boss for a raise
• How to ask your supervisor for help
• How to discuss dissatisfaction with the job
• How to ask for a change of assignment
• How to politely state that you don’t discuss your personal life at work
• How to ask the boss for a vacation
• How to give and receive praise/compliments
• How to invite someone out for coffee, lunch, etc.
• How to say “no”
• How to talk to doctors and other authority figures
• How to talk with your kids
• How to tell someone “thanks,” but I am not interested.
• How to ask someone to stop yelling at you
• How to ask for clarification
• How to decline an unwanted offer
• How to discuss uncomfortable topics with others.

38
MODULE 3C

LIFESKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD

COMMUNICATION
INTERVIEWING

GOAL: This module allows each participant to role play an

employer or potential employee who is being interviewed
for a job. The wrong and right way to appear will be
reviewed.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• identify appropriate interviewing skills

• express themselves with greater clarity
• prepare a list of questions for an interview
• be prepared to answer stock employer questions

MATERIALS: Handouts: The Job Interview, Interview Tips, The Mock

Interview

39
Module 3C

THE JOB INTERVIEW

Few things are as frightening as public speaking and rock

climbing, but going to a job interview has to rank pretty high.

There is no escaping some anxiety around these activities. In fact

some anxiety is good in that we are energized and ready for the

challenge while experiencing some discomfort.

In terms of job interviewing, there is one main thing that we can do

to help minimize the pressure of performance anxiety. Nothing is

more reassuring than knowing something about the job or position

that one is applying to. It is even better, if we know the duties and

salary range for the position. It is therefore important to do some

background checking and perhaps speak to others who may know

something about the position. Being forearmed with as much

information as possible will help in the competitive job market.

40
Module 3C

INTERVIEW TIPS

Things to do and not to do:

• Know something about the company

• Know exactly how to get there
• Be prepared to ask some questions
• Be prepared to answer tough questions
• Arrive at the interview on time
• Give a good handshake and smile
• Listen to the question and answer it only
• Do not answer in monosyllables
• If you can’t answer a question be truthful
• Don’t talk negative about your last employer
• Don’t ask about money, vacation, benefits etc

41
Module 3C

THE MOCK INTERVIEW

Select pairs of one interviewer and one interviewee and role play an actual
job interview. Some pairs should display inappropriate attire and behavior
with poor responses.

1. Have the group select the types of jobs they would most likely be
interviewing for.
2. Have them volunteer for each role.
3. Give them time to come up with questions that pertain to the job
duties, and some answers to typical questions.

Interviewer Suggestions:

1. “Tell me about your work background?”

2. “I see a big gap between your employment periods, can you explain?
3. “What interests you about this position?”
4. “What would you say are your strengths and weaknesses?”
5. “How well do you get along with others like supervisors, and peers?”
6. “Why should I consider you for this position?”
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.

42
The Nuts and Bolts
MODULE 4A

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

MONEY MANAGEMENT

GOAL: This module is designed to deal with developing a

financial budget. Participants can expect to gain a good
perspective of their financial needs and resources. They
will be able to determine if changes in spending patterns
may help them.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• outline a monthly cash flow of income and expenses

• look at frequent/necessary expenses
• make decisions regarding savings/ purchases etc.
• develop a budget plan on a time frame
•

MATERIALS: Handouts: Money Management, Cash Flow, Savings,

Creative Ways To Increase Income

43
Module 4A

MONEY MANAGEMENT

There are certain topics that tend to make us feel uncomfortable and money

management is such a topic. The subject of money; how we use it, and

abuse it, is closely related to our style of functioning and has many

ramifications.

There are those who look at money as a tool for enjoyment and pleasure and

therefore spend little time planning for the future. There are others who fear

running out of money to the extent that they become penny pinchers and

don’t allow any expenses for self enjoyment without feeling guilty.

Most of us however, can relate to the anxiety around how we are managing

our money. No matter how small our income may be, the ability to know

what our expenditures are and how much can be saved or trimmed is

important to know. We need to take a serious look at our income and

determine our spending habits. We will then be able to decide where we

can cut back, save, or expand. In other words, we can learn to take better

control of the way we manage money.

44
Module 4A

CASH FLOW

At times it seems that money just slips through your hands and you don’t
know where it went. If this happens regularly, it indicates that you are not
keeping track of expenditures. This leads to overspending and missing
important payments. The suggestions below will help to lower frustration
around money management and increase the sense of control in this area:

• Know your monthly income

• Write a list of your regular monthly expenses including food,
gas, and clothing
• Know when you have special bills for insurance and taxes
• Are you spending less than you bring in?
• Work out a plan of savings

Income Expenses Savings

45
Module 4A Cont.

SAVINGS

If you completed your cash flow chart and there is no money left for a
savings, use this sheet to look at your expenditures to see what can be cut or
reduced until the desired amount is obtained.

THINGS THAT CAN BE CUT

Please list the item(s) that can be cut for the purpose of saving the desired or
needed amount:

Categories: Amount of Cost Amount Saved

1. Junk food
2. Clothing
3. Entertainment
4. Eating Out
5. Hair Appointments
6. Nail Appointments
7. Other
8.
9.
10. Total Saved _____

46
Module 4A

CREATIVE WAYS TO STRETCH INCOME

Examples:

• Barter (exchange) for services with your neighbors or at your

child’s school
• Child care or drop off children at school
• Tutoring parents and children in your area of strength
• House cleaning, grocery shopping or running errands
• Hair cuts, manicures / pedicures
• Collect and exchange manufacturer’s coupons with friends and
acquaintances
• Shop at supermarkets that offer double coupons
• Shop at stores that offer good discounts
• Purchase clothes at thrift shops/ exchange with a friend
• Save aluminum cans and glass bottles
• Plant flowers in a neighbor’s yard
• Paint house numbers on curbs using stencils for a price
• Save pennies in a piggy bank
• Wash cars for your neighbors and friends
• Seamstress services like hemming, mending and buttons
• Plan your daily driving route before you leave your home to
accomplish more than one thing to save gas
• Advertise the above services by giving out flyers in your
neighborhood and at school. Make your own business cards
and pass them out to anyone who may need your service.

47
MODULE 4B

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

TIME MANAGEMENT

GOALS: This module is designed to help participants design a

plan for the daily use of their time taking into account the
schedules of their families. Participants will be able to
have a realistic view of what their parameters are and
how they can reasonably achieve their goals within a
given time frame.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• outline their daily schedule

• determine how much time is needed for
educational/vocational goals
• plan ahead for future needs

MATERIALS: Handouts: Your Time Is Important, Daily Planner, Tools

To Start, Time Management

48
Module 4B

YOUR TIME IS IMPORTANT!

Time management is a carefully thought out plan of action aimed at

engaging you in activities that are focused upon goal attainment. There are

only so many hours in a day. But have you ever thought to consider that the

same hours you are given in a day to accomplish things are the same hours it

takes to be a doctor, writer, producer, or the president of a company? We

are all CEO’s over our lives. What are you doing with your given hours in a

day? Do you find that time slips away from you? Are you wasting time

with excessive TV viewing? Sleeping? Procrastinating? What are you

accomplishing in your 24 hours? Are you following through on major

projects? Are you satisfied with your leisure time? If you are like a lot of

people, you can make improvements in the area of time management.

One of the problems in this area may be a lack of knowledge about the tools

of management and how to use them. If you compare yourself to people that

seem to get an enormous amount of things done in a short amount of time,

you will find that their activities are typically focused and goal centered.

They typically have a plan that is flexible and workable. In short, they

pursue goals until the job is completed or the situation is resolved.

49
 DAILY PLANNER (A)
Use this calendar to record your regular activities for each day of the week.
To simplify your calendar use 1 or 2 word descriptions. Use down- point
arrows to illustrate the same action for extended periods of time.
Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday
6:00
AM
6:30
AM
7:00
AM
7:30
AM
8:00
AM
8:30
AM
9:00
AM
9:30
AM
10:00
AM
10:30
AM
11:00
AM
11:30
AM
12:00
PM
12:30
PM
1:00
PM
1:30
PM
2:00
PM
2:30
PM
3:00
PM
3:30
PM
4:00
PM
4:30
PM
5:00
PM

50
Module 4B Cont.

TOOLS TO START

• Evaluate your use of time.

• Focus on your goal, what you want to accomplish.

• Write down your steps and realistic deadline dates.

• Put away distractions and focus upon the task.

• Build in rewards for yourself when you complete aspects of the

project.

• Consult if necessary and seek advice.

• The more planning you put into it the better the outcome.

• Create more time for yourself and your project when possible.

51
Module 4B

TIME MANAGEMENT

Please discuss the following questions:

• Why is it important to manage time?

• How do you go about establishing goals?

• Why is it important to plan ahead? What can go wrong if you

don’t? Share a real life example.

• Why is it so important to write down what you need to do?

• Name three things that are your biggest “time wasters.”

• Describe the last time you successfully organized something?

• What are the ingredients to a successful outcome?

• Why is it important to set a time frame and stick to it?

• Describe how you managed a baby, housework, if relevant—school

and or work.

52
MODULE 4C:

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

DECISION MAKING

GOALS: This module is designed to make participants aware of

the process of decision making, which takes place from
moment to moment each day. They will learn helpful
strategies in improving their ability to make better
decisions. Participants will gain knowledge about how
to prevent repeating past mistakes.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• increase decision-making awareness

• learn to use decision-making strategies
• evaluate decisions and examine outcomes
• reward themselves and learn from mistakes

MATERIALS: Handouts: Preparing for a Decision, After the Decision

Has Been Made, and Decision Making Strategies, and
Decision Exercise

53
Module 4C

PREPARING FOR A DECISION

The difference between you and someone who seems to succeed most of

the time may just have a lot to do with preparation. People who habitually

make bad decisions usually lack sufficient information, and make

decisions based upon emotions or they may not be thinking clearly as a

result of drug/alcohol use/abuse. Other causes may have to do with

making spur of the moment decisions. Lastly, some people feel by not

making a decision, they are prolonging the inevitable, not knowing that

things not addressed can often get worse.

THINGS TO DO

1. Obtain as much information about the issue as you can.

2. Analyze the available information—learn as much as you can

3. Decide if the risk is too high

4. Determine what the opportunities would be and their value

5. Seek counsel if needed. Discuss your ideas with someone

who can be objective.

54
Module 4C

AFTER THE DECISION HAS BEEN MADE

Once you have followed the steps of preparation and you have made a

carefully thought out decision, you must learn to live with the

consequences of that decision. If there are things you can do to change it

and you so desire, follow the steps of decision-making and decide how to

proceed. Making good decisions up front brings good outcomes and the

good outcomes are experienced as rewarding. The more you make sound

decisions the more pleased you will be with the outcomes.

When we make hasty and bad decisions the outcome tends to be less than

desirable. However, when life throws us a curve ball and we make a bad

decision, we may have to live with it. It is to our advantage, if we learn to

accept the things that we cannot change. While we try to learn from our

poor decisions, sometimes it takes us longer to change. We must be patient

and remember, we are after all, only human!

55
Module 4C

DECISION MAKING STRATEGIES

Things to consider when making that next big decision:

1. Decide whether or not you need to make a decision at this time.

2. Rule out illegal, dangerous, or unethical options that can lead to

trouble.

3. Consider the advantages and the disadvantages of your decision.

4. Determine how your decision will affect others

5. Consider the advantages and the disadvantages of your decision.

6. View more than one solution to the dilemma, you may have over-
looked some things.

7. Compare the costs and potential gains as a result of your decision.

8. Know that once a decision has been made there is often little that
can be done to change it.

9. Remember, no decision is a decision!

10. Try to make decisions you can live with based upon your views
and values.

11. Learn from your decisions: Know what went right and what went
wrong, for the next time around.

56
Module 4C

DECISION EXERCISE

Using the directives for “Decision Making Strategies” and “Things to

Do,” partner in small groups to discuss important decisions that you have
made in the past. Think about those decisions that had good outcomes and
compare with those that had poor outcomes. Discuss in terms of the
differences between the two.

57
The Balancing Act
MODULE 5A

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE BALANCING ACT

SETTING PRIORITIES

GOAL: This module will focus upon the daily tasks and
activities that need to be completed in order to achieve
life goals. Participants will develop an activity list of
goals and objectives to be done on a daily basis. They
will learn to plan each day in advance.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• create a simple set of priorities each day

• develop three goals each day
• set priorities about what they want to complete
• focus upon keeping the “big picture in mind”

MATERIALS: Handouts: Setting Priorities, My Daily Schedule, Thing

That Must Be Done

58
Module 5A

SETTING PRIORITIES

Gone are the days when we could take out time and make a few important
decisions and feel confident that things are being taken care of. In today’s
world, we not only drive faster, eat our food by drive-by, and obtain vast
amounts of information via the internet; we have many more options to
consider. Our minds can quickly become overloaded with things to do,
places to go, and issues to be addressed.

The stress level of today’s society can be overwhelming. Worse yet, is to

forget something very important like paying taxes, or paying a traffic
ticket before it goes into a warrant, or getting that water bill in before the
water is shut off. There are doctor visits and school appointments for our
children, and countless other obligations that sweep quickly by. We are
amazed that things get done at all! What’s more curious is that we get to
do many of these things over and over again; bills are to be paid every
month and shopping has to be done on a regular basis etc.
In this morass of confusion, one might ask, “How Do I Balance All of
This Stuff?” One way to get started is to organize, organize, and organize!
The best way to organize is to set priorities. While there may be three big
things competing for your attention, there is usually one of the three that
has an early deadline. That’s the one that gets the attention first. It is as
simple as that. As you sit down and list the obligations that you have, we
make priorities based upon (1) importance, (2) consequences, (3)
resources and (4) self and family needs.

What is important to each person may differ because of our uniqueness,

but we can all agree that monthly responsibilities such as bills, grocery
shopping and making important appointments are a must. Indeed, if these
things go unmet we suffer consequences, some of which are very
devastating, such as a loss of housing and care of our children. Resources
can determine our ability to meet many of our obligations. For example, if
we don’t pay our car registration when due, we very well may pay more
when we are ticketed. If the citation is not taken care of in a timely
manner, it goes into a warrant and oh my! How the trouble has escalated!
We need to take the time to think about what is important to us, list the
duties that we have, and prioritize.
59
Module 5A

MY DAILY SCHEDULE

Write in your daily schedule

6AM

8AM

10AM

12AM

2PM

3PM

4PM

6PM

8PM

10PM
60
Module 5A Cont.

THINGS THAT MUST BE DONE

(A): From My Daily Schedule check off the most important things that
must be done.

(B): List 3 things that are a priority. There may be special bills to be
paid, there may be important doctor’s appointments, school visits,
employment interviews, upcoming exams, help for a relative etc.

1.

2.

3.

(C): List 3 things that you could put off for another day if necessary.

1.

2.

3.

61
MODULE 5B

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE BALANCING ACT

HOME/WORK/SCHOOL

GOAL: This module is designed to help participants sort out

the often times overwhelming task of balancing the
needs of the family with employment or educational
commitments.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• discuss concerns around the topic of employment or

school
• label barriers such as time, childcare, and support
• list responsibilities such as cooking, cleaning,
childcare, transportation, and coordinating family
schedules
• learn to delegate, organize and learn the value of
staying flexible

MATERIALS: Handouts: Balancing Home, Work, and School,

Organization and School, Organization and work,
Helpful Tips For Home, Work and School

62
Module 5B

BALANCING HOME WORK AND SCHOOL

Mary is divorced with an eighteen-month-old toddler and two grade
school children. She was excited to find a part time job at the college that
she attended. She wants to get a certificate in medical billing. She has a
very hectic schedule but manages to get by with the help of a sitter who
takes care of the toddler. The most stressful time for Mary is her
mornings. She feeds and prepares the children for school, and herself for
work, and school. Her evenings are a close second, because she has to
prepare meals, help with homework, and get them all bathed down and
ready for the bed. Even though Mary feels exhausted from her busy day,
she takes the quiet time in the evening to pay bills and study for her school
assignment. She hopes to get enough sleep so that she won’t be too tired
to get up and get everyone off and on time.

If this sounds like Mary could use some help. You are right! Will she get
it? That’s another story. She feels fortunate to have a reliable baby sitter
and she lives close to her children’s school. They have to ride the bus. She
has also applied for housing assistance and is looking forward to a bigger
place.

Mary copes with her hectic schedule, but feels overwhelmed when the
unexpected hits her tight schedule. For example, she receives a call from
her fourth grader’s teacher, saying her son is being disruptive in class and
there needs to be a teacher-parent meeting. In that same week she has two
exams that she cannot afford to miss, and her toddler has not been sleeping
well. She has been fighting off a sore throat. Balancing the needs of
home, work, school, and self can certainly be challenging! It is an on-
going process, and without help and support, it may mean that something
will go undone. In Mary’s case, she rescheduled her meeting with the
school, after her mother agreed to go see the teacher in her place. She
took her exams because she was near the end of the semester, and she
made a doctor’s appointment to find out why she was feeling sick. She
needed some help with chores and the children in the evening, and she was
able to get a friend to come over twice a week to help her. It is not easy
balancing such competing demands, the miracle is that so many parents
continue to do it, and many are successful.

63
Module 5B

ORGANIZATION AND SCHOOL

Answering these questions will help you decide if you have developed
good habits:

1. Do you have a set time for daily study?

2. Do you have a set place where you study?

3. Do you make regular deadlines?

4. Do you plan ahead without procrastination?

5. Do you write a daily list of things to do?

6. Do you record when assignments are due?

7. Does your work interfere with your study?

8. Are you easily distracted?

9. Do you let others know that you need quiet time?

10. Do you reward/praise yourself for completing your assignments?

64
Module 5B

ORGANIZATION AND WORK

• Write it down—make a list—don’t rely upon memory

• Remember that not all listed tasks have to be done at the same time

• Look at your To Do List and prioritize the task that are high
priority. Tasks that don’t have to be completed immediately,
remove from your list

• Decide what day you want to complete the tasks that are important
but are not urgent

• Divide up your tasks into segments and work on each piece of the
larger tasks until completed

• Make sure that your focused upon completing tasks that are
necessary and that lead directly to your goal completion

65
Module 5B

HELPFUL TIPS FOR HOME WORK AND SCHOOL

Below are some helpful suggestions in efforts to balance needs of home,

work, or school:

• Obtain trustworthy childcare

• Have a can-do spirit to look for creative solutions
• Seek help
• Delegate responsibilities
• Have a good emergency system in place where you can be reached
• Develop a good work relationship with at least one other person
whom you trust
• Be open with bosses or teachers when your are getting
overwhelmed. They may be able to make helpful suggestions
• Stay flexible. You may have to wait to finish a class, or you may
have to take time off to see to the needs of children
• Things you cannot change, you have to let go. There is always
tomorrow

66
MODULE 5C

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

THE BALANCING ACT

FAMILY/FRIENDS/MYSELF

GOAL: This module is designed to assist participants in

making time for the important people in their lives,
including themselves.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• discuss the importance of having some family time

together in making good memories
• learn to put time on the schedule to be with adult
company for entertainment and enjoyment
• build in self- pleasures by making a list of things
enjoyed, like reading, sewing, taking a luxury bath
etc.

MATERIALS: Handouts: Family, Self And Friends, Things I Like

To Do With My Family, With My Friends, Things I
Like To Do By Myself

67
Module 5C

FAMILY SELF AND FRIENDS

When we stop to think about the balance we would like to create between
our families, and friends, we can get discouraged and take the easy road of
just dealing with our children and spouses. This kind of isolation from
others may be at times comforting, but on a regular basis may not be best
for our children or us. There are times when family demands are there and
must be attended to because they are high on our priority list. Yet, there
are times when we need adult company and intellectual stimulation. Since
we only have a certain amount of time in a day, we have to be careful to
plan both quality time and quantity time with those we care about,
including ourselves. A useful concept that could help organize for quality
and quantity is the idea of making good memories.

If you stop to think about it, we seldom do things with our family and
loved ones in order to make good memories. We interact and travel
together, and do many things without stopping to think about the
memories that we are creating. To deliberately set out to plan something
significant and fun for our families takes some forethought and
imagination. There are some suggestions for building good family
relations such as having family conferences, eating dinner together,
sharing the trials and triumphs of the day, and asking for help and changes
to be made. Projects can be planned together. Even small children can
participate in things like putting a picture book together of old family
photos. The key to the planning is making it memorable.

Last but not least is oneself. We have to learn to put self first in terms of
our mental, physical, and spiritual health. We don’t think about self until
there is a breakdown in our system and we become debilitated in our
ability to function and do the things that we typically take for granted.
When for example, our health becomes affected we immediately notice
that we can’t do things the way we have always done them. We may
experience depression. It is only when there is an interruption in the things
that we take for granted, do we stop and think about self. Putting oneself
on a schedule may be a smart way to ensure that personal needs are taken
care of.

68
Module 5C Cont.

THINGS I LIKE TO DO

WITH MY FAMILY

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

69
 Module 5C Cont.

THINGS I LIKE TO DO

WITH MY FRIENDS

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

70
Module 5C

THINGS I LIKE TO DO

BY MYSELF

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

71
Module 5C Cont.

Addressing Substance Use/Abuse Issues

Relationships are difficult! The balance between taking care of self

and others can also be difficult at times. Yet it is important to work

toward addressing our needs in light of the needs of others. We can’t

achieve our life goals when we become too consumed with ourselves

as seen in alcohol and drug use. Likewise, if we ignore our needs for

the needs of others on a consistent basis, we will find ourselves in a no-

win situation, feeling angry and unappreciated.

TIMES WHEN MY FAMILY HAS BEEN AFFECTED BY DRUGS

OR ALCOHOL USE

1.

2.

3.

HOW DRUGS OR ALCOHOL HAVE AFFECTED MY

FRIENDSHIPS
1.

2.

3.

72
Time to Act/Stop Procrastinating
MODULE 6A

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

TIME TO ACT
STOP PROCRASTINATING

MY PERSONAL PLAN

GOAL: This module is designed to help participants design

their own plan of action. They will prioritize their life
goals and objectives. The plan of action will include
educational and vocational goals along with needed
social/emotional support systems

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• write down their educational goals

• write down their occupational goals
• identify plan of action, including which site they
will visit for additional information

MATERIALS: Handouts: Plan of Action, Plan of Action Resources,

Employment Resources, Where Am I Going To
Network, Employment, Search Log

73
Module 6A

PLAN OF ACTION

Goals and dreams are one thing, but to see them come to fruition, we need
a well thought out practical plan of action. This is especially true in the
area of employment where there are so many options and requirements. In
order to achieve your plan, begin to think of the steps involved. Ask a lot
of questions of yourself and others. Is this plan practical? Will you be
able to finance it? How long will it take to prepare for the job or the
career? Will it involve returning to school for a certificate, or a degree?
Do you have help or support to make this goal a reality, or are you
basically on your own? What are some of the things that will hinder you
and possibly interfere with your success? Is there a shorter way to get
what you want? How much are you willing to compromise? What are the
advantages and disadvantages to your family? Can you live with the
consequence of your decision if it does not work out?

People that go from day dreams to actually accomplishing their desires are
able to answer these questions. The first step is to ask the right questions,
seek information and advice, and listen to your own sense of reason in
how much you will be able to do. Perhaps your dream can be captured in
a longer period of time than you initially thought. With additional
information, you may even find that there is an even better idea than the
one you had.

If you have to scrap the dream once you have investigated it, don’t feel
that all is lost. You have saved you and your family a lot of hard work,
money and precious time on an endeavor that could not be completed at
this time. Remember, the future holds a lot of surprises and only informed
risk takers reach out to grab a hold of their dreams. Make sure you step
out loaded with questions and answers. Good luck!

74
Module 6A

PLAN OF ACTION RESOURCES

Places I need to go for additional information:

For Example:

• Speak to coordinator of CalWORKs program at a local

community college

• Stop by the One-Stop Center for employment information

• Interview a friend’s contact to ask questions about the

requirements of a particular job

• `

75
MODULE 6B:

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

TIME TO ACT
STOP PROCRASTINATING

DESIGN A RESUME

GOAL: This module helps the participant design his or her own
personal resume. The participant will be assisted in
designing their own unique script even if they have no
employment history. They will learn how to use
creative and alternative ways to share information
about their skills and interest.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• be creative in describing experiences and interests

• include coursework and certificates
• identify skills gained during volunteer work
• list positive personal characteristics
• include both paid and unpaid experience

MATERIALS: Handouts: Writing Your First Resume, A Fresh

Review of Your Talents, Action Verbs, Chronological
Worksheet, Chronological Resume, Functional Resume
Worksheet, Functional Resume, Hybrid Resume
Worksheet, Hybrid Resume, Cover Letter

76
Module 6B

WRITING YOUR FIRST RESUME

JITTERS!

There are those of us who would hear about a good job prospect but
immediately get cold feet when we learn that a resume is required. After
all, a resume is a listing of all of our jobs, right? Well, yes and no! Of
course if you have jobs and some of respectful duration, by all means
include them in your resume. But, what about the person who does not
have work experience and or may have only a short amount of time on
several jobs? How about the person with big gaps in employment, where
they have not worked at all? One can certainly get cold feet, when you
think about exposing what seems to be glaring weaknesses to a
prospective employer.

Given the anxious task of putting a resume together that displays our
strengths and not our weaknesses can be a challenging and exciting task.
Yes, with the proper tools and knowledge about what you want to display
and how you want to highlight your talents and interests, you too can be
competitive when it comes to designing your personal resume.

One way to view this process is to think about your own work history in a
different light. Perhaps you have been a volunteer at your child’s school.
You did not think about this activity as work because it did not pay a
salary. But, this experience can be emphasized to show your experience
and talents in a creative way. Let’s dissect all of the skills required for this
position: one has to be prompt, dependable, cooperative, knowledgeable
of school rules and discipline procedures. You would also be required to
be patient, yet able to set limits and create activities that can be engaged in
with a particular goal in mind. You are required to work well with
supervisors, peers and parents. And oh yes! You should be able to relate
well with young, energetic children. I think you get the picture!

Designing a resume may be surprisingly revealing of your life

experiences. When you view it from this perspective, you may be a bit
more excited about exploring this venture.

77
MODULE 6C

LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP

TIME TO ACT
STOP PROCRASTINATING

BRING IN THE
GUEST SPEAKERS

GOALS: This module will be informative in that various guest

speakers will be present to talk about what their agency
offers and answer questions from participants.

OBJECTIVES: Participants will be able to:

• hear guest speakers from different sites:
• talk to community college representatives
• get information on obtaining a GED
• attend a one-source center for orientation

MATERIALS: Handouts: City of L.A. WorkSource Centers by

Region, City of L.A. WorkSource Centers, L.A.
County One-Stop Delivery Career Centers, One-Stop
Locations & General Information

78
Appendix
 LIFE SKILLS SUPPORT GROUP
CURRICULUM

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

Modules 1A
Modules 1B
Modules 1C

Modules 2A
Modules 2B
Modules 2C

Modules 3A
Modules 3B
Modules 3C

Modules 4A
Modules 4B
Modules 4C

Modules 5A
Modules 5B
Modules 5C

Modules 6A
Modules 6B
Modules 6C

79
Module 1A

INSTRUCTORS GUIDE

MODULE

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

ATTITUDE

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Attitude Is Key,

Examples of Negative Thoughts…

ACTION PLAN: The first hour read and discusses the ideas and issue in
the article entitled, Attitude Is Key. Talk about how
negative thinking can affect the way we feel and
determine behavior. Give examples of how different
people can have the same experience but experience
different feelings and engage in different behaviors.
This is evidence that people process things in ways that
are helpful or destructive.

HOMEWORK: Write down negative thoughts and come up with an

alternative view that will be more helpful for you.

This module selection (attitude) requires an LPHA provider

80
Module 1B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

MOTIVATION

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Things That Interfere

with My Goals, My Life Has Meaning When…,
Things I Really Enjoy Doing

ACTION PLAN: Read and discuss the article, “Motivation.” Ask them
if they know what or who makes them want to
improve, and strive for goals. Have them read over
The Things That Interfere With My goals. Ask them if
they can identify with any items, and discuss. Have
them complete the worksheets on My Life Has
Meaning When, and Things I really Enjoy Doing.
They can share in teams or with the group at large.

HOMWORK: Encourage participants to engage in motivating

behavior and practice self rewards.

81
Module 1C

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE RIGHT FRAME OF MIND

RESPONSIBILITY

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Barriers In My Past,

Making Better Choices, and Addressing Subtance
Use/Abuse Issues

ACTION PLAN: In the first hour read and discuss the article,
“Responsibility.” Talk about how we at times try to
avoid it and how we at times feel overwhelmed with it.
Emphasize the payoffs involved in taking more
responsibility for our lives.

Have participants complete each exercise and discuss

in pairs, or small groups.

HOMEWORK: Pay attention to tendency to avoid talking

responsibility. Put the ideas in this module into
practice.

82
Module 2A

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Techniques For

Managing Negative Behavior, Making “I”
Statements, My Personal Strategy For Dealing
With Difficult People.

ACTION PLAN: Spend the first hour reading and discussing

the handouts. The second hour involves
getting the group to pair up to practice making
“I” statements. On an individual basis they
can complete the Personal Strategy for
Dealing with Difficult People. If some have
trouble with reading and writing, the group
leader should help them through.

HOMEWORK: Practice making “I” statements when working to

resolve conflicts

83
Module 2B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

DEALING WITH ANGER

TOOLS: Copies of handouts for the group: Article

on Anger, and Make A List Of Times
When Anger. . ., What Makes You angry,
Things I Can Do Or Change. . .

ACTION PLAN: The first 15 or 20 minutes read and discuss

the article entitled Anger. Give enough
time for participants to complete the three
exercises and discuss in large or small
groups.

HOMEWORK: Encourage participants to practice what

they have learned in today’s module.

84
Module 2C

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO HANDLE THE TOUGH STUFF

STRESS REDUCTION

TOOLS: Copy handouts: Stress Reduction,

Relaxation, Exercise, Eating Right,
Addressing Substance Use/Abuse Issues,
and Things to Put in My Stress-Quake Bag

ACTION PLAN: Read article on Stress Reduction and

discuss. Make a decision about what
material to share and have the group
complete the form entitled, “Things That I
Put in My Stress-Quake Bag.” If you
select the relaxation exercise, you may
want to play soft music.

HOMEWORK: Participants should be encouraged to make

changes in the way they respond to stress
by using the knowledge gained in this
module. They should prepare their stress-
quake bag at home and have ready for use.

85
Module 3A

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD

COMMUNICATION
NON-VERBAL

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: The interview

cartoon, Non-Verbal’s—You Are Seen Before
Heard, A Non-Verbal Sizing Up, and Role
Play Exercise, “Body Language Speaks.”

ACTION PLAN: Group leader reads article, “You Are Seen

Before Heard, and discuss issues with the
group for the first half hour. The remainder of
time should be used completing selected
exercises. A Non-Verbal Sizing Up can be
done individually and discussed in small
groups. Body Language Speaks is a fun
exercise for participants to do in front of the
group.

HOMEWORK: Pay attention to the body language of those

you communicate with. Turn the volume
down on the TV set and read the non-verbal’s.

86
Module 3B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD

COMMUNICATION
VERBAL

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Verbal

Communication, Making “I” Statements,
Communication Skills

ACTON PLAN: Spend the first hour discussing the handouts.

The second hour will be a group exercise
using the handout entitled, “Communication
Skills-Possible Topics For Discussion.” Have
two people role play selected portions on the
list.

HOMEWORK: Practice conversation starters in their circle of

friends; let the participant decide what they
would like to do on the list for homework.

87
Module 3C

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

HOW TO PUT YOUR BEST FOOT FORWARD

COMMUNICATION
INTERVIEWING

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: The

interview cartoon, The Job Interview,
Interview Tips, and The Mock Interview

ACTION PLAN: Use the first 15 minutes of group to go

over the article entitled, The Job
Interview. Read and discuss the article,
Interview Tips. Use the rest of the group
time to select pairs of interviewers and
interviewee’s to role play an actual job
interview. Listen to participants’
experience in the role plays, and discuss
the experience.

HOMEWORK: Participants can go over list of stock

interview questions and answers in
preparation of a job interview.

88
Module 4A

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

MONEY MANAGEMENT

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Cartoon,

Money Management, Cash Flow, Savings,
Creative Ways to Stretch Income

ACTION PLAN: Read and discuss the article entitled,

Money Management. Give participants
enough time to complete the cash flow,
and savings exercises. End by sharing the
list of Creative Ways To Increase Income.

HOMEWORK: Put what they learned today in action by

developing a budget and looking for
additional money sources.

89
Module 4B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

TIME MANAGEMENT

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Your Time

Is Important, Daily Planner, Tools to Start,
Time Management.

ACTION PLAN: Read and discuss the article entitled,

“Your Time is Important. Have
participants complete the “Daily Planner”
and discuss “Tools to Start,” in pairs.
Save time to read and discuss the article,”
“Time Management,” and discuss in the
big group.

HOMEWORK: Put at least two things learned today into

practice.

90
Module 4C

INSTRUCTORS GUIDE

MODULE

THE NUTS AND BOLTS

DECISION MAKING

TOOLS: Copy handouts: Preparing for a Decision,

After the Decision Has Been Made,
Decision Making Strategies, and Decision
Exercise

ACTION PLAN: Read and discuss the articles, Preparing

for a Decision, After the Decision Has
Been Made, and Decision Making
Strategies. The last half hour put
participants in pairs or small groups to
discuss their own experiences around these
issues.

HOMEWORK: Put into practice something learned from

this exercise for their next big decision.

Module 5A

91
 INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE BALANCING ACT

SETTING PRIORITES

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group on Setting

Priorities, My Daily Schedule, and Things
That Must Be Done

ACTION PLAN: Read and discuss the article on Setting

Priorities with group. Have them write out
their daily schedule. They are to note the
busiest times of the day, and the times
when things are not so hectic. Next,
participants should begin the process of
prioritizing their time by completing the
worksheet, Things That Must Be Done.

HOMEWORK Participants should begin to make plans

around their daily time schedule, keeping
in mind what can and cannot be changed.

92
Module 5B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

THE BALANCING ACT

HOME/WORK/SCHOOL

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Cartoon,

Balancing Home, Work and School,
Organization and School, Organization
and Work, Helpful Tips For Home, Work
and School.

ACTION PLAN: Spend the first hour reading the material

and discussing it. Last hour, participants
should answer the questions on the article
entitled, School and Homework
Organization. Even if they are not in
school they can answer most of the
questions. Discuss answers in the group.

HOMEWORK: Participants should use the suggestions in

the Helpful Tips For Home, Work and
School

93
Module 5C

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

FAMILY FRIENDS AND SELF

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group: Family, Self And

Friends, Things I Like To Do With My Family,
With My Friends, and Things I Like To Do By
Myself

ACTION PLAN: Spend the first hour reading and discussing the
issues in the article. Have them complete the
exercises on family, friends and self. Discuss
the results in large group.

HOMEWORK: Encourage participants to put into practice the

things they would like to do in each category.

94
Module 6A

IINSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

TIME TO ACT
STOP PROCRASTINATING

MY PERSONAL PLAN

TOOLS: Copy handouts for the group:

Cartoon, Plan of Action, Plan Of Action Resources,
Employment Resources, Where Am I Going To
Network? Employment, Search Log. If the material
is too much to copy, make one copy for the group in
a notebook that can be shared.

ACTION PLAN: Group leader reads the article on Plan Of Action to

the group and discuss the issues in the topic. Leave
time for participants to complete the Plan Of Action
Form, and complete the exercise entitled, Plan Of
Action Resources.

HOMEWORK: Visit some of the sites, begin to network, collect

information.

95
Module 6B

INSTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

TIME TO ACT
STOP THE PROCRASTINATION

DESIGN A RESUME

TOOLS: Copy handouts for participants: Writing Your First

Resume, A Fresh Review of Your Talents, Action
Verbs, Chronological Worksheet, Chronological
Resume, Functional Worksheet, Functional Resume,
Hybrid Resume Worksheet, Hybrid Resume, Cover
Letter

ACTION PLAN: Group leader reads article, “Writing Your First

Resume Jitters!” Discuss with the group briefly the
typical experience of anxiety around resume
preparation. Spend most of the time letting the
participants complete the worksheets dealing with the
type of resume they want to write. They should come
up with a rough outline of how their resume should
look. The group leader should help each participant.

HOMEWORK: Complete, or polish up the design of their resume and

try it out by sending it or leaving it with prospective
employers.

96
Module 6C

INTRUCTOR’S GUIDE

MODULE

TIME TO ACT
STOP PROCRASTINATING

BRING N THE SPEAKERS

TOOLS: Provide information regarding the various vendors in

the field of employment. Make a booklet containing
the handouts entitled, “City of L.A. WorkSource
Centers, L.A. County One-Stop Delivery Career
Centers, and One-Stop Locations & General
Information. Be creative, you may have a local
community college representative for CalWORKs
attend. Make sure that your guest speakers will show
up! A two hour group can have more than one speaker.
Make sure it is a person or organization that your
participants are interested in.

ACTION PLAN: If the worse happens, and your guest speakers don’t
show up. Go over each vendor in your packet. Some
of your participants have visited these places and can
add to the discussion. They could also go and visit the
vendors.

HOMEWORK: Encourage participants to visit vendors and other sites

on their own to find out more information.

97
REFERENCES
 SUGGESTED READINGS

Bourne, Edmund J. Progressive Muscle Relaxation Technique. The

Anxiety & Phobia Workbook. Oakland, California: New Harbinger .
Publications, 1996.

Ellis, A., and Harper, R. A Guide to Rational Living. North Hollywood,

California: Wilshire Books, 1961.

Los Angeles County Office of Education. Job Preparation Guide.

Downey, California: L.A. County Office of Education, 1997.

The California Institute for Mental Health. Improving Mental Health

Outcomes for CalWORKs Participants in Los Angeles County. Los
Angeles, California: California Institute for Mental Health, 2007.

98