ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE INTERVIEW

with
Tulku Thondup

Interview with Tulku Thondup by Linda Sparrowe, editor in chief of Alternative Medicine
magazine. A portion of this interview appeared in the May 2006 issue of Alternative Medicine
magazine. For more information on the magazine, visit http://www.alternativemedicine.com.

1. Tibetan Buddhism often focuses on death and dying. That is a difficult

concept for Westerners, I think, who have a fear of death and a
preoccupation about it at the same time. Why does Buddhism focus so much
on death?

TT: The goal of Buddhism is to improve life. But for Buddhists, life isn’t just this one
life that we now see. “Life” includes our future lives too, for Buddhism believes in
reincarnation, and we see life from that broad perspective. So for us, death is a part
of life. It is the unavoidable transition that joins this life to the next.

When I lived in my monastery in Eastern Tibet, we used to contemplate our

mortality and the changeable nature of the world every morning. The purpose was
to keep us on track and anchored in reality. There’s nothing like the unavoidability of
death to focus the mind on what is truly important in life – spiritual values.

We have all asked ourselves: “What should I do with my life?” The fact that
we ask this shows that we have some notion that our time here is short and that we
should use it wisely.

When we understand our mortality and the speed with which life is passing --
not just intellectually, but from the heart, -- we will innately know what to do with
our time here. We will automatically want to deepen our spiritual qualities, for
everything else is left behind at death.

Death makes us realize how precious every moment is. We start to critically
examine everything we do in this light: “Will this activity further my spiritual
evolution and the evolution of all beings, or not?” If it does, we will spend more time
on it. If it doesn’t, we will waste less of our precious time on it, and perhaps even
eliminate it altogether.

Consider our situation from the perspective of death. Rich or poor, famous or
unknown, this body is just a guesthouse. It is our mind, consciousness, or soul that
will continue on, carrying with it nothing but its habitual patterns and spiritual
imprints of all the good and bad that we did in life. Buddhism teaches that our mind
will migrate and take rebirth in a new body. As anyone with children knows, they’re
don't come into this world as a fresh slate. Each of us has a long history going far
back in time.

Where we will reborn next and whether we will be happy or not, all depends
on the state of our mind now, the mental habits we cultivate, and what we do in this
life.

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 Buddhism explains that everything we think, feel, and do generates a
corresponding positive or negative imprint in our subconscious mind. Selfless,
peaceful, and joyful thoughts leave imprints that will give rise to the most wondrous
forms, sounds, and feelings in our future lives. Negative thoughts will give rise to
frightful sights, sounds, and experiences.

At this moment, we can’t see the imprints we have etched in our mind. But
we will see them when we leave our body at death, for then we will be nothing but
mind. The superficial layers of our mind will peel away, exposing the inner layers.
Whatever mental habits we sowed there will manifest and unfold as our new reality.
We will be reborn in a place that corresponds to our predominant mental habits.

If we cultivate a peaceful and joyful mindset now, we will be reborn in a world

of peace and joy after death. We might come back as a wonderful person. Or we
might go to a heavenly paradise of light and love, which Buddhists call “pure lands.”
If we go to these paradises we will become enlightened in that very lifetime.
Enlightened ones know every being's needs and can help each of them, if he or she
is open.

If, on the other hand, we are filled with, say, jealousy, we will be reborn in a
world that reflects that mindset: a competitive world where beings always try to
sabotage each other.

The beauty of life is that, like a rewritable CD, we can erase and create
whatever imprints we wish in our mind. By cultivating qualities like compassion and
peace we can wipe our negative imprints and replace them with positive ones. So we
control our future. Every moment is a fresh chance to imprint something new.

So, yes, death is a difficult topic. But thinking about it is so worthwhile.

Understanding death will transform how we live. We will instinctively know what’s
important and what’s not, and stop wasting time. We will want to cultivate qualities
that will make us blossom spiritually and radiate peace and joy for all – and not just
in this life, but also in the infinite future.

2. Doesn't focusing on death in your meditation make it more difficult to be

in the present, to be really living? Doesn't it take me away from my day-to-
day activities? Wouldn't such a focus add more stress to our lives?

TT: You might think that meditating on death and rebirth would be stressful.
However, stress – the bad kind anyway – usually occurs when we feel scared and
helpless.

Regarding feeling scared, we tend to fear what we don’t know, just as

children are afraid of the dark. But Buddhism gives us all the information we need
about death. Enlightened Buddhist masters going back to the Buddha have
described death and after-death in detail. Even today, clairvoyant Tibetan adepts –
including my own teacher -- can remember their past lives and see where others
take rebirth.

Tibet also has an amazing tradition of people who undergo prolonged near-
death experiences (they're called delog, returners from death). They travel
extensively through the next world until they revive, days later, to share vivid

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accounts of what they saw and learned. My book, Peaceful Death, Joyful Rebirth,
describes 11 such stories. Simply having all this information demystifies death and
helps reduce our fears.

As for feeling helplessness, Buddhism’s core message is that we can handle

death and our journey beyond. There’s no reason to feel helpless. No matter how
negative our life may be now, Buddhism shows us how we can dispel the nightmare
of our confusion and usher in the dawn of peace and joy when we die.

Also, if we believe in life after death, preparing for our next incarnation is the
ultimate insurance policy. It lets us rest easier and enjoy life more. It’s like students
before exams. They can’t feel confident unless they studied. Or it’s like stocking up
before a storm. If the refrigerator is full, we can relax despite the storm. So
preparing for rebirth should make us feel more confident and hopeful.

Now, if thinking about death just makes us worry without doing anything
constructive to improve our lives, then that’s not helpful and we should think less
about it, and try to improve our life.

Meditations on death and rebirth do not remove us from living fully in the
present. What is most important to living fully is not to be aware of every detail in
our surroundings. Rather, it is to be aware of the peaceful, joyful, devotional,
compassionate qualities in our own mind and heart.

That’s what most death and rebirth meditations try to do: transform
awareness from the inside. In many meditations, we imagine that we are in a
celestial paradise of light and love. We generate feelings of peace, devotion, joy,
love, purity, and respect, and contemplate in them. The purpose is to transform our
mind’s way of perceiving so that we see everything with peace, devotion, joy, love,
purity, and respect.

When that happens, we begin to really live life fully, bringing these amazing
mental qualities to everything we do, for the mind is the source of everything. As
our mind becomes more peaceful and joyful, whatever we say or do becomes the
expression of that peace and joy. We become a source of peace and joy for others.
And after we die, these inner qualities will manifest for us as a world of peace, joy,
and love, and we will be reborn in such a world.

As we develop these inner mental qualities, we experience everything -- from

washing the dishes to taking a walk -- as much more beautiful, vibrant, and open.
Why? Because when we transform our mind, we transform our perception of the
world -- and that is what fills life with meaning, richness, and wonderment.

Right now, we don’t control how we think and feel much. We mostly just react
to external events and our surroundings. If someone slights us, for instance, we
immediately feel hurt. If we live in an ugly house, we’re resentful. However, by
making our mind more peaceful and joyful, we eventually bring the celestial world of
happiness and peace into our own heart and mind. Then, even if we live in the same
house, we will be happy there.

Also, preparing for our next incarnation requires that we be always watchful
of what we’re thinking and feeling. We need to be able to catch our negative
thoughts and feelings and stop them, and then consciously replace them with

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positive thoughts and feelings. That’s how to wipe out old mental habits and etch
new imprints in our mind. So it takes a lot of being present in the moment to train
for death and rebirth properly.

3. Do you offer meditations on death and dying to those who are not
initiated into the Buddhist tradition?

TT: Actually, most Buddhist meditations on death and dying are for everyone. They
are intended to help us peel off the outer layers of our mind and bring us closer to
the amazing wisdom, peace, and joy that we possess in the core of our own minds.

My book, Peaceful Death, Joyful Rebirth, focuses on some of the most

accessible, yet also most powerful, death meditations in Tibetan Buddhism: those on
the Buddha of Infinite Light (Amitabha) and his pure land, or paradise. The only
condition is that we be open to them.

Here is the meditation in brief.

First, we visualize the Buddha of Infinite Light and his pure land (or paradise),
vast as the universe, in the sky before us. It is a beautiful world, made of colorful
rainbow-like wisdom light filled with infinite enlightened beings of light. They have
omniscient wisdom, unconditioned love as a mother to her only child, and the power
to fulfill all our wishes, if we are open for that. In truth, they are not someone else,
but the reflection of the enlightened qualities of our own mind.

Then, filling the whole universe with the celebratory sound of prayer, we chant
Om A(Ah)-mi-ta-bha hri (Oh Buddha of Infinite Light, please heed me!), again and
again. We visualize and feel that the wisdom, compassion, and power of the Buddha
and all the enlightened ones flood into our body and mind in the form of streams of
blessing lights - the purest qualities of the elements of earth, water, fire and air --
with blissful-heat. All our physical impurities are cleansed and we are transformed
into a pure body of light. Our mind is transformed into a mind with wisdom,
compassion, and power. We feel and enjoy the experience over and over. We then
share the blessing lights with all beings and the universe, especially the dying and
dead. Finally, we contemplate in the resulting feeling, relaxing in it without thinking.

If your faith permits it, you could incorporate this meditation into your own
tradition. Pray to the divinity or higher power of your faith, receive their blessings,
and contemplate in the feeling that results -- be it peace, joy, compassion, or
whatever other positive feeling you may have.

4. What can such a meditation teach us about who we are and how we are
connected to one another, to those who came before us and those who have
yet to come?

TT: Buddhism teaches that we were all each other’s parents or children in at least
one of our infinite lives. Anyone could be our son or daughter in the future. We are
invisibly linked in many ways.

Death meditations are much more powerful when we appreciate our

interconnectedness and generate love and the wish to help all beings. This caring

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attitude opens our mind. And it is the truth. According to Buddhism, we all share the
same foundation: we’re all basically good and enlightened. It’s our rigid mentalities
and negative emotional habits that trick us, like nightmares, into thinking that we
are separate from each other.

Meditations like the one on pure land help break the walls that separate us by
purifying negative emotions like hatred, greed, and jealousy and awakening
universal qualities like joy, peace, respect, devotion, openness, compassion, and
wisdom. We deepen the feeling of interconnectedness by imagining that we are
praying with countless other beings and by sharing blessing lights with all at the end
of the meditation.

Also, the reason we train to go to the pure land in the first place is to serve
others. Pure land beings have clairvoyance to see what others need and power to
help them – far more power than we have here. Once such beings attain
enlightenment, they become omniscient and can manifest what every being needs, if
he or she is open.

5. For those who are not Buddhists, can they enhance their own lives and
their own spiritual tradition by incorporating some of these practices?

TT: The meditations in my book can be incorporated into any spiritual tradition that
permits. You can substitute the Buddha of Infinite Light and his pure land for
whatever higher being and heavenly world that you believe in. Enlightened beings
and heavenly worlds transcend all boundaries of culture, language, and tradition.

All beings are enlightened in their true nature. Every one of us can unlock our
true nature that is preserved in the depth of our mind. The meditations I give are
essentially designed to help us uncover our enlightened nature, and refine and
perfect it so that it may shine forth to serve all beings with the same love we would
have towards our only child or our own parents. They apply to any tradition.

6. What are a few practices we can do to prepare ourselves for the death of
those we love as well as our own death?

TT: The death of someone we love is always difficult because we think it is the end
of our physical connection with them in this life. But death is not the end; there will
be life after death.

Still, to reduce the shock of death, we should get used to the idea that he or
she will die. Death is part of life. We are always losing things as we get older.
Understanding this will make it less shocking when it happens.

If we could feel confident that our loved one will have a better future after
death, that will bring joy and mitigate the pain of separation. So we should always
look out for our loved one’s spiritual wellbeing. Since the mind is the main source of
what happens after death, we should encourage whatever makes the person’s mind
more peaceful, joyful, and kind, as that will result in a happier rebirth for them. Even
if the person is still negative, feeling that we did our best for their future happiness,
that we made even a small difference, will be very healing to us psychologically and
spiritually.

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 We should remember that we are not helpless in the face of our loved one’s
death. The closer a person is to us, the more our prayers can make a difference for
them. The reason is that the closer people are, the more channels link them
together. So people dear to us will be more receptive to us spiritually. Knowing this
will help us channel grief in constructive ways and help us and them.

Lastly, we can pray that we, our loved ones, and all beings take rebirth in a
pure land, a paradise, when we die. The message of Buddhism is that we determine
where we go after death. The thought patterns we generate now will guide our
journey then. So if we prepare to go to a pure land, it is entirely possible to reunite
and become enlightened together there. We can do the pure land meditation I
described earlier.

Also, whenever we do anything positive, -- meditation, charity, whatever, -- we

can dedicate the good karma we created to all beings for their rebirth in a pure land.
Dedicating like this augments the positive force of our efforts to be reborn there
manifold.

7. Many people face the painful task of helping a parent or someone they
love when they are sick or at the end of their life. Does Buddhism have any
tools for us to become more present to those who are dying? Are there
rituals or meditations we can do if we haven¹t been initiated into the
secrets of Tibetan Buddhism?

TT: Caring for a sick or dying parent or loved one is an amazing spiritual practice.

It isn’t always easy, of course. In those moments we should remind ourselves

what a privilege it is to help another; what an opportunity it is to grow in patience,
compassion, strength, and love – extraordinary mental qualities that will become a
great source of good karmas for ourselves and others. So if we feel resistance, we
should try to break through it and feel thankful for the privilege of helping the person
during this hard time. The words “thank you” are magical in how they open our mind
and heart. If we approach the situation this way, every moment will be a blessing.

It is very important to prepare yourself spiritually and meditatively, as the

person nears the end of life. If your mind is peaceful, joyful, and energized with
blessings, your presence and whatever you say will help. If you are sad, nervous,
and shaky, your help will be less effective. So meditate and pray yourself. Try not
to lose your own spiritual ground. Instead extend your experience to the person.
Consider the mental, habitual and cultural background of the person and think about
what help would best suit them.

If it is proper, hold the dying person's hand. Look at them with kindness and
confidence. Give whatever advice is proper. Meditate and think that the blessing
lights and energies that you are experiencing are being transferred to them. Think
that all their fear, worry, and sadness are totally dispelled in the form of darkness
from their body and mind.

Don’t talk to the dying person about too many things, even if they are
profound, for as people prepare to leave, their minds become less sharp. Say less,
but make it meaningful. Just say something like, "Remember that the Buddha of

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Infinite Light [or whatever higher being the person believes in] is with you” or " Om
A(ah)-mi-ta-bha hri." Say this over and over. This is simple and easy to
comprehend. Repeating it with a gentle, strong voice makes it sink into the person's
mind and could remain with them through their journey.

How we speak to the dying person is as important as what we say. Everything

should be from the heart. Everything should be said calmly, truthfully, with
confidence. Do nothing that would hurt or upset the person. Say nothing that might
create anger, confusion, or attachment.

Keep reminding the person to pray to whatever higher power they trust in. If
you know whom they pray to, you can invoke them, too. If the person has no
tradition, but is open to prayer, you might ask if they would like to repeat a prayer
like, “God, please be with me all the time.” If the person is Buddhist, remind them to
pray to whatever Buddha they prayed to. You can use the meditation on the Buddha
of Infinite Light and his pure land described earlier.

8. Are there simple meditation practices we can do once someone has died
to help him or her and help ourselves in the grieving process?

TT: People who have just died may stay around familiar places and people for a few
days before continuing on. They have semi-clairvoyance to read others’ minds. So it
would be a great help if survivors refrained from thinking or saying anything impolite
about the deceased and postponed all thoughts of inheritance for some days.

In my book, Peaceful Death, Joyful Rebirth, I describe the prolonged near-

death experiences of 11 gifted Tibetans that offer an amazing insight into what it is
like on the other side. One woman said that after she died, she stayed in her house
for some time. Her grieving children’s tears felt like hail pelting her. Their cries
sounded like thunderclaps. But when friends came to pray for her, she felt immense
joy and peace. When one man visualized himself as the Buddha of Infinite Light, she
saw him as a translucent Buddha and experienced ineffable joy and security. Such
experiences are common, which is why Buddhists urge survivors to pray or at least
generate peaceful, celebratory feelings after someone dies.

When a person passes away, they are just mind. Whatever they think instantly
appears, their karma permitting. If the deceased could remember higher beings,
those beings would instantly appear, conjuring up all associated feelings of devotion,
love, peace, and joy. This experience would help them greatly in their journey.

That is why we could also remind our dying loved one: "You might see and hear
scary or beautiful images and sounds. If you do, remember that they are not real.
They are just the projections of your mind, like dreams. Don't get scared. Don’t get
attached. Just keep remembering the presence of the Blessed One (whomever the
person believes in). Keep praying to the Blessed One. Bathe in their blessings. That
will protect you. That will lead you to a wonderful place.”

For a simple meditation, think and feel that the room and house where the
body is resting is filled with peace and calm. Rest in that feeling as long as you can.
When your mind is peaceful, visualize and think that the deceased person is bathing
in that peace, over and over. Then think and feel that the room fills with light, light
of joy, and that the deceased is bathing in that light of joy. Stay in that feeling as

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long as you can. This meditation will help anchor the deceased’s floating mind, calm
their fear, and fill them with light and joy.

If you are religious, visualize and feel the presence of the Blessed One in which
you and the deceased have faith. Pray and ask the Blessed One to envelope the
deceased in blessings and feel the peace and light, as above, believing that it came
from the Blessed One. This will help the deceased and spontaneously ease your own
sadness and pain. Helping the deceased through prayer and meditation brings
consolation to your heart.

The following simple suggestions may also help with grief.

In your mind’s eye, see your grief as a huge, dark cloud. Feel that the whole
sky of your mind is covered with this heavy cloud of sadness. Then see an opening
in the clouds. A patch of bright blue sky and sunrays pour through it. The opening
gets bigger and brighter. Finally, all the clouds dissolve and fade away without
leaving a trace. Believe that your sadness dissolves with the clouds.

All you now see in the sky of your mind is the clear, clean, wide open, bright
blue sky and a magnificent shining sun, the sun of joy.

The open sky is the clarity and openness of your mind. The sun is the joy of
your mind. Feel the sun’s joyous rays shining on your face. Feel the clear, open blue
sky in your heart. Let yourself be in communion with the sky and sunlight. Know that
only joy and openness are in you.

Whenever we feel sad, we should remember that in its true nature, our mind
is totally peaceful, clear, clean, joyous, open, and wise. No matter what happens in
our life, this true nature is unstained. Simply remembering that we have these
qualities within us will give us strength, confidence, and hope.

If you can’t help feeling sad, give yourself permission to feel sad. Tell
yourself, “Of course I am sad. It’s okay to feel sad – something serious happened.”

However, instead of dwelling on the sadness, try to focus on whatever is

positive in the situation. Even if the picture looks 99% bleak and just 1% positive, if
you focus on the 1%, it will become bigger and stronger and may eventually
subsume the 99%.

So explain to yourself: "I am sad because of my love for this person. My tears
are the expression of my love. It is wonderful." The moment you see your sadness
as a positive, your mind will emerge from the negative clouds of sadness and
experience joy.

Try to recall happy memories. Think about the person’s good qualities.

Remember that sadness will pass. Nothing is permanent. Everything changes

momentarily. Time does heal. Tell yourself, “it will pass.” If you do, the burden of the
sadness will lessen. But if you tell yourself, “I’ll never ever get over this,” the
sadness will feel heavier.

We always want everything to be smooth sailing in life. That’s normal. But

difficult times are an amazing source of refining our lives, if we know how to use

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them. They help us grow even more than good times do. They make us realistic,
resourceful, wise, intelligent, and strong. So when you feel grief, remind yourself
that every trial has a treasure buried within it, and that you will see little shoots of
green grass beginning to sprout in your life.

9. The Tibetan system of bardos is also a difficult thing for most Westerners
to understand. Do we move through them only after death or during the
dying process?

TT: The bardo is the transitional passage between death and rebirth. When we die,
we lose consciousness. When we regain it, we find ourselves outside of the body and
our bardo journey begins. It ends the moment we reincarnate.

Our experience in the bardo is like a dream. It isn’t real. But we think it is, just
as we believe our dreams are real when we’re dreaming.

Our mental habits are all-important in the bardo. Without a physical body to
anchor us, we have little mental stability. So we fall back on our habitual mental
patterns. Our thoughts and feelings unfold as the terrain we experience in the
bardo. For one person it could be raining weapons; for another, flowers. It all
depends on what habits we sowed in our mind.

Jealousy and hatred will assume threatening, scary forms. Joy and peace will
manifest as loving, sublime beings who welcome us and lead us to happy rebirths.

Most of the people who had prolonged near-death experiences that I describe
in my book met divine helpers after death. They were all devout. One woman
encountered a female Buddha blazing in a sphere of light when she died, for
instance. This Buddha whisked her off to a pure land. Another woman was met by a
radiant male Buddha. Yet another person was overjoyed when he encountered the
historical Buddha.

We, too, can have wonderful experiences in the bardo, for we control our
destiny. Right now, with our mind anchored in this body, we can cultivate positive
mental habits through meditation. Doing so will enrich our life now, contribute to a
better society, and usher in the dawn of peace and joy for our future.

Death isn’t an easy subject. But there are few subjects that are as worth our
while to understand.