Monster-Cooking Rules

E
VER WONDER WHAT IT MIGHT BE    like Fiends usually dissolve into foul ichor when slain outside of
to eat a monster? Don't lie, of course you their native plane, so a prospective fiend-eater will have to
have. If you have proficiency in Cook's travel to the lower planes and eat a fiend there. If you
Utensils, and a suitable corpse that hasn't somehow manage to pull this off, which is an extremely bad
been rendered inedible, you can spend an idea, take 8d6 necrotic damage. You gain one casting of
hour cooking the monster. Roll 2d4 to Summon Greater Demon as a 4th-level spell, which must be
determine the amount of monster meat used within the next 24 hours. The demon is immediately
produced. This number cannot exceed the maximum number hostile upon summoning, and lasts for an hour or until
of servings. reduced to 0 hit points.
Giants are at least somewhat intelligent, but ogre meat is
Servings by Creature Size too good for you to question if this is cannibalism or not. Gain
Size Servings +2 hit points for every hit die used during a short rest, and you
Tiny 2 or less gain one casting of Enlarge/Reduce, which must be used
within the next 24 hours. You can only use this spell to cast
Small 4 Enlarge, and can only target yourself.
Medium 8 Humanoids definitely count as cannibalism, so you must
succeed on a DC 10 Charisma saving throw or vomit up the
Large 16 meat (assuming you are in fact a humanoid). Gain +2 hit
Huge 32 points for every hit die used during a short rest, if you pass.
Monstrosities make up the bulk of a monster cook's dishes.
Gargantuan 64 or more Gain +2 hit points for every hit die used during a short rest.
Oozes are inedible, and usually corrosive. Don't try.
Monsters can be eaten during the same rest in which they Plants are an extremely normal meal. Somewhat less so if
were cooked, or saved for later. They must be consumed they were just alive and thrashing about. +1 hit point for every
within 3 days of killing, or the meat will go bad. hit die used during a short rest.
Monster Types Undead are disgusting and inedible, unless they were alive
until very recently (and are still corporeal). In this case, use
Some types of monsters are more suited for consumption the rules for whatever it was in life, and take 2d12 necrotic
than others. damage.
Aberrations are not meant for mortal stomachs. Make a
DC 15 Wisdom saving throw. On a success, you gain 60ft. Monster Meat in the World
telepathy for the next 24 hours, and +1 hit point for every hit Non-humanoids consuming monster meat might experience
die used during a short rest. On a failure, take 2d6 psychic different effects. Most monsters have no qualms about eating
damage and gain a random form of long-term madness, as humanoids, for instance. A fiend or undead consuming a
described on page 260 of the DMG. celestial might make it more powerful, or it could cause the
Beasts make nice, normal meals, that normal people eat. creature to explode. A construct such as a flesh golem or a
Gain +1 hit point for every hit die used during a short rest. modron may be able to convert monster food to energy.
Celestials are nearly impossible to eat, and extremely not Monster meat is considered a delicacy by a rare few, and
recommended if you somehow manage it. What's wrong with players may be able to find a noble or two willing to pay good
you? Gain +3 hit points for every hit die used during a short money for it. Creatures like lizardfolk or the monstrous races
rest. You gain a number of temporary hit points equal to your rarely have qualms with eating monster.
level, and your alignment permanently changes to evil if it
wasn't there already. Celestials will recognize you as an enemy
on sight, forever. Additional Options
Constructs are inedible, unless you can eat rock or metal Your DM may choose to allow some of these
or whatever the construct happens to be made out of. additional options.
Dragons are the ultimate meat for any true monster chef. If Curing or otherwise preserving the dish can make
the dragon is a true dragon, regain all hit points, and gain a it last indefinitely. The cook requires dry salt or
one-use breath weapon equivalent to the dragonborn breath brine for meat preservation.
weapon of the same color. Otherwise, gain +3 hit points for Monster Eggs are often edible, should the party
every hit die used during a short rest. encounter a nest. Use the appropriate rules for the
Elementals are inedible. You can drink a dead water monster type. Eggs produce fewer servings than
elemental, but it won't confer any bonuses. fully grown creatures, but tend to be found in
groups.
Fey eat people all the time, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Seasoning, or adding certain herbs or spices to a
Gain +2 hit points for every hit die used during a short rest, dish, can enhance the taste of it. The dish restores
and you gain one casting of Misty Step, which must be used 1 additional hit point per hit die.
within the next 24 hours.

Monster-Cooking Rules, v1.0

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