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Week 5 Picks:: Once U Go Stash U Neva Go Back vs. Goomba Stomps

The document provides weekly fantasy football picks and analysis for a league called RvP. It summarizes each matchup and predicts a winner based on the teams' records and players. Injuries, trades, and recent performances are considered in making the predictions.

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Dan Lewis
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48 views4 pages

Week 5 Picks:: Once U Go Stash U Neva Go Back vs. Goomba Stomps

The document provides weekly fantasy football picks and analysis for a league called RvP. It summarizes each matchup and predicts a winner based on the teams' records and players. Injuries, trades, and recent performances are considered in making the predictions.

Uploaded by

Dan Lewis
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Week 5 Picks:

I know that the picks and the draft video have been a massive part of what has made RvP special to
many of you, and I’ll do my best to try and get a few in this year despite being stretched rather thin. As
we enter into our 11th quest for the trophy (of which I’ve won 0!), I’d like to welcome new faces such as
AJ Sowers (yet another league member who’s kissed my sister...great) and the return of one of our
founding members, the man, the myth, the nemesis….Kenny!

Last week’s Extra Life goes to Micah, whose 18.39 point pickup and play of Kalif Raymond helped propel
him to victory! Honorary mention to me for a 33 point Sam Darnold pickup but he’s a QB and lets face
it...I still lost :( Last week’s Goomba Stomp Moment goes to CJ, whose embarrassment of riches
resulted in a 26.1 point benching of Corey Davis (and he still scored 180).

Rolando is the only one currently participating in the League Pick’Em, however, I will at the very least fill
that out for the rest of the season. So if you wanna go up against the master of RvP picks, join us and
submit your picks each week before Thursday Night Football!

Mario is a unique take on themes as it is the first time we’ve picked a theme where, despite a plethora
of content, there is almost no real dialogue. All I can say is, challenge accepted….HERE WE GO!

Once U Go Stash U Neva Go Back vs. Goomba Stomps:


This week in the battle of teams with running backs named J. Williams that aren’t very good…. Chris
enters this week with an identical record to me, this despite him being the 5 th highest scoring team and
me next to last (thanks for sucking more than me Kyle, you’re a true friend!). Chris’s posse of fantasy
goodness has cleared the 122 point mark every week of the season, while my team’s done that just
once. I’d love to open up my picks with a prediction of a win for myself, but lets be honest, the hope for
that is as slim as Mario’s chances of finding peach in a castle. Another year, another fantasy loss for the
Commish. Goomba Stomps with the W!

(Yes this one


was one
bonified
Mario
reference
and I blew it
in the first
pick of the
first
pick’em)
Bow Down to the Crown vs. Yeah! Waluigi’s the winner! :
It hasn’t been a banner start to the season for Kyle, and if he suffers yet another embarrassing defeat
(he’s yet to break 112 points) he may have to change his team name. Jenna is only 1-3 herself, but took
a tough luck loss on a high scoring week last week and her team is finally showing signs of life. I’m going
with the tried and true I’ll believe it when I see it when it comes to Kyle and winning, until then I think at
the very least he needs to change that exclamation mark at the end to a question mark! Bow Down to
the Crown with the W!

Hamma Jamma vs. Hurts like Bowser:


Kevin opened the season with a heart wrenching loss as he watched his
kicker leave him .12 points short of a week 1 victory on Sunday Night
Football. Although he enters the week at 1-3, that’s actually an
improvement for him after truly horrific freshman and sophomore RvP
seasons. He faces off against a Matt led team that’s always moving and
shaking, even if it isn’t always to his benefit. Despite being 2-2, Matt decided
to trade his opponent a starting player this week for a guy whose likely to sit
this week. Maybe Matt knows something I don’t or maybe he’s simply
playing the long game, regardless I gotta go with Hurts Like Bowser with the
W in this one!

Up we go! vs. Super Murray-o:


CJ opened the season by dropping 165 points...and losing by 30! After such a massive letdown his
fantasy squad rattled off two more losses before absolutely dominating his week 4 opponent in a 79
point route. Fittingly, there isn’t anywhere for Up we go! to go at this point but up! He faces off with
the better half of our Marty brother duo in Pat, whose had the benefit of far and away the easiest
strength of schedule in the league to this point and is sitting pretty at 3-1. I expect this one to be a
tightly fought battle, but fate and the gods owe CJ this one after what they did to him in week 1. Up we
go! With the W!

Triple Red Shells vs. Heavy-Blow Bros.:


195 – 140 – 95 – 84 . Ryan’s point path is clearly headed in the wrong direction after his 195-165 week 1
victory. He faces off with a Rolando led team that seems to literally never have a bad season. Rolando, I
just want you to know, I hate so much about the fantasy player you choose to be! My gut says Ryan will
pull this one out, but my asshole says that Rolando will do what he’s done to me time and time again
when I’ve picked against him….which in order to keep this PG I will picture below. Heavy-Blow Bros.
With the W!

(If you didn’t


figure it out
yet...Rolando
is Toad)

King Bomb-omb vs. ‘D’oh I Missed!’:


Bucking all of the recent trends when newbies who don’t know who F. Gore is join RvP, AJ is absolutely
dominating us. He not only has the #4 QB, he has the #1 and #2 WR’s and enters week 5 with 3 of his 4
totals over 150. I’d like to write something elaborate and clever here, but given Micah’s team is being
held together with gum and rubber bands… ‘D’oh I Missed!’ in a landslide!
(Even MacGyver points
the missle in the wrong
direction once in
awhile Micah)

It’sOnLikeNdamukong vs. Thwomped:


First off I’d like to take a moment and congratulate Scott, who if you don’t know, became a
father in Week 3! Scott enters a pivotal week 5 match-up against Kenny on a 3-game winning
streak despite the fact that Ronald Jones is one of his two starting running backs. You might
take that as me leaning Kenny, but (1) Jenna would murder me if I took the evil Kenny in my
debut picks and (2) Scott’s greasy little mullet toting tight-end is due for a breakout. That’s right
folks, Scott’s resident Joe Dirte tight end has been quiet to start the year but he and Trey Lance
look poised to correct that issue against a soft Seattle D. It’sOnLikeNdamukong with the W!

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