Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models DEBBIE OLLAThe Five Ws and One oy Planning a Retreat ‘A retreat is time away, a withdrawing from worldly activities for spiritual recollection, study, and fellowship. It's a retreat from ordinary routines and surroundings to regroup, reenergize, and to experience and celebrate faith. Retreats for young people generally focus on themes that relate to experiences in their lives. The primary goal is to help teens step away from normal daily life to focus on their spiritual growth and to integrate faith with lived experiences. To develop an effective retreat for young people, it is important to do some groundwork. Begin by asking the five Ws and one H—Who? What? Why? Where? When? and How? WHO? ‘The question Who? has two parts. First, Who is the target group or audience? Is it the ninth-grade youth group? Or is it everyone who participates in the high school youth ministry program? Or is it 1 group of parents and teens? Deciding whom you are preparing the retreat for will help you meet the needs of the group. Where are they spiritually? What are their faith needs? The second part of the question is, Who is needed to make this retreat happen? Your list may include a guest speaker, someone to share a witness talk, a person to be in charge of the food, small group leaders, and other adult helpers. The list you make here will probably change and take shape as you answer the other questions. Each retreat experience is unique because the Who?—who isthe target group, and who is helping— is different. Each person brings his of her own personality and faith experiences to the retreat. So even if you did a retreat on peer pressure last year, this year’s will be different because the Who? has changed. WHy? Why would this group benefit from a retreat? Does - this group need to have a retreat experience as part {3 of their preparation for Confirmation? Or would a retreat help to build community within a newly formed youth group? ce o INS SW 6 Retreats for TeensWHAT? The question What kind of retreat should be offered? has three parts. 1. Theme ‘What theme is appropriate for the target group? Preparing for Confirmation? Understandi maintaining relationships? Building community? Strengthening family? 2. Purpose and Objectives What is the purpose for having this retreat? The objectives will flow out of the purpose. Tf the purpose of the retreat is to improve communication between parents and teens, the objectives may be to present guidelines for effective communication and to give families opportunities to practice using these guidelines. 3. Format ‘What will be the most effective format for the retreat? Should the retreat involve a couple of hours, the better part of a day, or an entire weekend? Should it include an overnight? WHEN? Answering the question When? involves looking at the target group and discovering what else is competing for participants’ attention and time. School? Parish life? Community involvement? Jobs? Sports? You would not want to plan a family retreat for the evening when parent/teacher conferences are scheduled in the parish school or local school district. Obviously, you would not schedule a retreat for high school juniors on the weekend of the high school formal dance. WHERE? Where should the retreat be held? The parish complex? A retreat facility? A rented hall? A campground? Sometimes the Where? is driven by the When? You may choose to hold the retreat in May because that timing works best for your programming and for the target group. But when you check the date on the parish calender, you find that the parish complex is reserved for a fund-raising auction ‘This event will also involve many of the parishioners who would volunteer to help you. You'll probably need to look at rearranging your schedule so that the retreat can be held at another time, Cost can also affect where the retreat will be held. You may want to hold a day of reflection at a retreat facility to take advantage of the beauty of the setting and to create the feeling of moving away from everyday life, But the cost of renting the facility may be too much for your budget and for you fo pass along to those attending. In deciding where to hold the retreat, it’s important to consider the nature of the retreat you have planned, For an ovemight or weekend retreat, you'll need a facility that provides adequate sleeping quarters, showers, kitchen facilities, and recreational opportunities. That means the parish hall wil not be the right setting for an overnight retreat, but it would be ideal for an afternoon family retreat. ‘The location for the retreat is an important part of the overall retreat experience. On the next page, there’s a list of questions to help you decide Where?General Questions + Where is the facility? Will you need to provide maps or directions? + Do any of the retreat participants have physical disabilities? If so, check with them to find out what accommodations they require. Will the facility be fully accessible for therm” ‘What is the cost? How and when does the facility require payment? How many and what size rooms are needed? Are these rooms available? Is there a separate chapel? Quiet space? Is there a room suitable for large-group work? Are there areas for small groups? How are the rooms furnished? What is the lighting like? Is there a place for indoor recreation? Outdoor recreation? Does more than one group use the facility at the same time? If so, how is time for the spaces scheduled? + What equipment and supplies are available? What will you need to bring? + Isthere an indoor fireplace or an outdoor firepit? + Does the facility provide snacks and meals? Can we choose to provide our own meals? What kind of cooking and dining facilities are available? Is there a refrigerator for storing soft drinks and snacks? In what areas of the facility are food and beverages allowed? Is there shopping nearby? Is there a pizza place nearby? Do they deliver? ‘Are there extra charges for equipment, supplies, and materials used? ‘Are there first-aid supplies available? Is there a hospital nearby? ‘What are the retreat facility's rules? What will your group be responsible for? Does the facility have an on-site contact person? Does the facility require proof that your group is insured by your parish or diocese? (For information about this, check with the parish business manager or administrator.) «= How will the group get to the facility? How much will transportation cost? Questions for Overnight Retreats + How are the sleeping areas set up? What is the capacity? + How are the areas separated for a coed group? + What is provided for sleeping—beds, cots, bedding, pillows? + Are towels provided? + How many showers and sinks are available? Is this adequate? Or will you need to build extra time into the schedule so everyone will be able to use the showers? TT Retreats for TeensThings to Keep in Mind + Not all retreat facilities cater to youth and the ones that do are in demand. You may need to book a facility as much as a year before your retreat. _ + The facilily that sounds like a good thing over the telephone or looks good on a full-color ‘brochure might be deceiving, It is always best to visita facility before you book it. Call - ahead to make sure someone will be aroynd to Ict you in and show you around. Make sure you inquire about any extra costs—rental fee for the TV or VCR, charges for providing bed linens, towels. . HOw? How? needs to be asked in every stage of your planning. Along with asking, Who is the target group? you'll want to ask, How will the target group learn ahout the retreat? How will it be publicized to them? When you ask, Who is needed to help? you'll also need to ask, How will volunteers be recruited? Here are some other How? questions you'll want to consider. + How can the parish be involved in the retreat? Ask parishioners to say prayers for a successful retreat and to write letters of affirmation to Participants in the retreat. You may also need fo ask parishioners for financial help. + How can we involve the families of those attending the retreat? Provide parents with information about the retreat by sending them letters or by inviting them fo a meeting. You may also ask parents and other family members for prayers and letters for retreat participants. + How will we extend the benefits of the retreat beyond the initial experience? It is important for the retreat team to make plans not only for the retreat, but also for follow- up events and activities. + How will we handle discipline? For suggesiions for retreat guidelines, see Appendix page 94. Make sure you inform young people about any rules or guidelines that the retreat facility may have. + How will the group get to the retreat facility? Can you ask parents to provide transportation? Will you need to rent a bus? + How will it all come together? You will need to do your best with the planning and then place the retreat in God's hands. Remember, prayer is key to the success of a retreat, ‘The most important How? question is, How will the purpose and objectives of the retreat be accomplished? Your answer to that question will he the content of the retreat—the components you put together to create an effective retreat. Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested ModelsFive Focus Areas ‘The content of a retreat focuses on five areas: 1. Community Building 2. Message 3. Response 4. Prayer and Worship 5. Follow-up Here are suggestions for covering these focus areas. Feel free to use and adapt these ideas to fit the needs of the target group and the skills and creativity of the retreat team. In determining the content of a retreat, it is impossible to overestimate the importance of good planning. The quality of the retreat’s content will reflect the quality of the preparation. For a checklist to use in your planning; see Appendix page 71. FOCUS AREA #1—COMMUNITY BUILDING Community building can happen in many ways throughout a retreat. Use community-building activities to: + Help young people feel comfortable with one another at the beginning of the retreat, (You've no doubt heard of “icebreakers," but one of the young adult leaders I work with likes to call them “fire-starters.”) + Refocus the group after a break or meal. + Set up the next activity, + Teach a skill. ‘Community-building activities can be very simple, requiring no materials or setup, or very elaborate, requiring supplies, props, and time-consuming setup. The following list is to help you plan any activity, whether it is for community building or for another focus area. Things to Keep in Mind Is the space suitable for the activity? an everyone participate? Will this activity embarrass anyone or make anyone stand out in a negative way? Is the activity safe? ‘Remember to EXPLAIN the activity, DEMONSTRATE what to do, and ASK if there are any questions. Be prepared to repeat your explanation if there are many questions. + Ifthe explanation of an activity takes longer than the actual activity, you may wantio. finda better way to explain it, simplify the activity, or choose another activity. ss TSE an RE ES STS 10 Retreats for TeensCommunity-Building Activities Icebreakers ‘Use these activities to help group members get to know and feel comfortable with one another. You can also use icebreakers to energize a group and to help them learn to work as a team. Suggestions for icebreakers are included in the retreat models in this book, but you can also find one hundred icebreakers in Getting Started: 100 Icebreakers for Youth Gatherings. See Appendix page 96. Songs Use songs, ranging from silly to reflective, to: + Reflect the theme of your retreat. A song that expresses the theme can be taught to the group carly in the retreat and repeated at various times during the retreat. + Emphasize a message that was shared. + Introduce or serve as prayer. Worship songs can be upbeat and lively or reflective to fit the mood of the group, + Break the ice, refocus the group, lead into an activity, or lighten the mood. Silly songs—irom commercials, TV theme songs, camp songs, children’s songs, movie soundtrack songs—fit these purposes perfectly. Music Videos Music videos of popular songs or music videos such as VeggieTiles can be used as community builders. Just as with songs, you can use lighthearted music videos to change the mood, to help people to be comfortable with one another, to introduce an activity, or to present a message. If you are using a song to support the retreat’s theme, you can use the music video of the song to reinforce its meaning. Letters and Affirmations There are many ways to use letters, notes, and written or spoken affirmations in building community. Letters and affirmations work best on a retreat in which the community has been gathered for a significant amount of time, such as an overnight or weekend retreat. + “My Christ” T would like to explain this activity by telling you my own story about the first retreat that I experienced as a teen, We all put slips of paper with our names written on them into a bowl. Then each of us picked a name. Naturally, if you picked your own name, you put it back and picked again. You were not to tell anyone whose name you picked. You were to regard the person whose name you had selected as “My Christ.” Throughout the retreat, you were to try to see Christ in this person and to be Christ for this person. The retreat leaders suggested nice things we could do—sit with the person at a meal or in Large-group sessions, open a door, ask the person to join in a game, spend time with the person during a break. Later in the retreat, each of us wrote an affirmation letter ta “My Christ.” In our letters, we were encouraged to share how we saw Christ present in our “My Christ,” what the retreat meant to us, what insights we were gaining from it, plus our hopes and prayers for our “My Christ.” The letters were to be positive and uplifting, with no put-downs or snide remarks even if we knew our “My Christ” very well and were only kidding. Each of us sealed the affirmation letter in an envelope. The envelopes were collected and distributed during the final prayer service. Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models "11 still have my letter from that first retreat. It meant a lot to me af the time and still does today, Since then, Ihave used this activity many times and find that the experience can be powerful if teens approach if seriously. Another option for picking “My Christ” names, particularly for retreats involving large numbers of participants, is for members of each small group to pick names within their own group. ““My Christ” letters can be distributed at the closing service of the retreat, Thave also incorporated the exchange of “My Christ” letters into the closing Liturgy on a weekend retreat. In either case, set aside time for participants to talk about their retreat experiences. The retreat director begins the sharing and then calls on a team member. The team member shares and then calls on his or her “My Christ.” The “My Christ” comes forward, receives his or her “My Christ” letter, shares retreat experiences, and calls on his or her own “My Christ.” This process continues until all have shared, If teens picked “My Christ” names within their small groups, the retreat director can call on small-group leaders to begin sharing, But whatever way you choose to distribute the “My Christ” letters, ask teens to wait until everyone has received a letter before they open and read their “My Christ” letters, + Care Letters Building community within families can happen even when all family members are not present for a retreat. To connect families with the retreat, ask parents or other family members to write letters to the participating teens. It usually takes some coordination to urrange parent/family letters, but the results are well worth the effort. I still cherish a letter I received from my mother during my first retreat, For a sample letter requesting and explaining parents/family letters, see Appendix page 87. Although sharing parent/family letters with teens can be part of any retreat, itis probably best suited to weekend retreats and is frequently a part of Confirmation retreats These letters can be distributed in many different ways. The parent/family letters can be handed out after affirmations done in the small-group setting. Or distributing the letters can be part of a prayer service. Whatever way you choose to distribute the letters, it is important to allow Participants time to read their letters privately. Plan to have tissues on hand because you will probably see some tears. Teens are often genuinely moved by what is said in these letters. ‘A word of caution: In all the years in which Ihave been involved in retreat ministry, either as a professional or as a volunteer, there have been only two incidents in which a participant received a negative letter from a parent. But you should have a plan in place in case it happens. You and the other adults who are helping you will want to be alert to anyone who may be having difficulty with what was written—positive or negative, * Write-Back Option To continue the retreat-to-home connection, eacourage retreat participants to write letters back to their parent, parents, or family. Participants may want to hand-deliver these letters, or they may prefer to have you mail the letters.+ Other Options for Letters of Affirmation For a retreat or day of reflection for Confirmation candidates, consider asking sponsors to write encouraging letters to their candidates. | also like to invite family members other than parents to write letters. 1 do this in my letter to parents, encouraging them to ask other family members or friends to write letters to the participants. See the sample letter for parents, Appendix page 87. You may also wish to invite members of the church community—pastor, parish council members, staff members, senior citizens’ group, and so on—to write to retreat participants. When there are affirmation letters for the participants from family members, parish members, and sponsors, I like to have participants receive the letters from their parents before the others so that their parents’ letters stand out in their minds. * Affirmation Notes, or Palanca first heard the word palanca on my first retreat, I still remember the explanation of the word. Palanca is a Spanish word meaning lever. A lever is used to lift or move something heavy. For our purposes, a palanca is a lever to help lift us spiritually or emotionally, to help us recognize the gifts we possess and the gift that each of us is. There are a variety of ways to do palancas, or affirmations, Palanca Bags Materials: A paper lunch bag ora medium-sized manila envelope for each person * smalll slips of paper » pens or pencils, one for each participant Preparation: Label each bag or envelope with a participant’s name, Do this ahead of time, or have participants label their bags or envelopes. Directions: First explain palancas and give an example or two. Then explain that participants will be giving one another affirmations throughout the retreat, For very small groups, between ten and fifteen people, participants could write an affirmation for each person on the retreat. For larger groups, participants could write one affirmation for each person in their small group, including the group leader. After participants have written one palanca for each member in their small group, encourage them to write one for anyone else they would like to. Each affirmation should be addressed to the person for whom it is intended and must be signed by the writer, Affirmations are to be positive and uplifting. They are not to have a negative tone or include put-downs or snide remarks, even if participants know one another well and are only Gdding. Affirmations can be written during breaks and free time and put into the bags or envelopes. Ask participants not to look in their own bags or envelopes. ‘They will be given time to read palancas later in the retreat. Note: Check the bags or envelopes periodically to make sure that everyone is receiving affirmations. Affirmation Papers Materials: a 8 '4" by 11” sheet of paper and a pen or pencil for each person _ Directions: This activity works best for small groups, Have each participant write his or her seme at the bottom of a sheet of paper and pass the sheet of paper to the person on his or her ‘Ssht. Participants are to write an affirmation for the person whose name is on the bottom of the ‘Peper they receive. Make sure participants know that what they write is to be positive and uplifting. Strategies and Tecn-Tested ModelsNo put-downs or snide remarks are allowed, even if participants know one another well and are only Kidding. The first person to receive a sheet of paper begins at the top of the sheet. After writing an affirmation, he or she folds the paper down to cover the affirmation and passes the paper to the right again. The next person writes his or her affirmation for the person at the “new” ‘op, ditectly below the fold. The process continues until the papers return to their original owners. Variation: Give group members one slip of paper for each person inthe small group, Have participants label each slip of paper with the name of a person in their small group and write an affirmation on each slip. These slips of paper can then be given to the person they are intended for. After each person has received his or her own sheet of paper or slips of paper, allow time for participants to read the affirmations they have received, either out loud to the group or to themselves, * Verbal Affirmations ‘We seldom hear verbal affirmations of others or of ourselves. Far too often, we hear the quick criticism, put-down, snide remark, or negative comment, ‘Verbal affirmation is a skill we need to learn. It should become commonplace in our conversations with and about others. So it’s important for us to practice affirmations. * Affirmation Circles This activity works best in small groups and probably at the end of the retreat, after participants have had a chance to get to know and feel comfortable with one another. Introduce the activity in the large-group setting. Explain the need for verbal affirmation. Point out that in giving affirmations, it is important to speak directly to the person being affirmed, to use the first person (“I”), and to be specific. It is equally important for the person being affirmed to accept the affirmation without commenting on it in any way, except to say “Thank you.” Give real examples of how to affirm someone verbally. For example, the retreat director may affirm members of the retreat team. The persons affirmed can provide examples of how to respond. To practice verbal affirmations, ask teens to join their small groups, Have each group sit in a circle on chairs or the floor. Option 1 Assign one person to the “hot seat,” the middle of the circle. This person moves around the circle, facing one person at a time. The person in the circle affirms the person in the hot seat. Each member of the group, including the small-group leader, takes a tum in the hot seat. Option 2 Provide a small lighted candle for each group. Hand the candle to one person and ask the rest of the group to affirm that person. When this person has received a verbal affirmation from each member of the group, he or she passes the candle to the next person. The process continues until each person has been affirmed, Option3 Have participants write affirmations on slips of paper, one slip for each person in the group. Participants can take turns verbalizing and distributing each affirmation to the person for whom it was written. This is a good way for a group that has a hard time being spontaneous to do verbal affirmations. ES ASS IRE ETE 14 Retreats for TeensFree Time and Breaks ‘These terms, free time and breaks, are sometimes used interchangeably. Both free time and breaks are planned time to allow for a break from the regular schedule. Both provide opportunities for participants to unwind, relax, and to build community in an informal manner. Free time is generally a longer period of a more unstructured nature. In bailding free time and breaks into a retreat, you need to find the right balance. Too much free time can break the flow of the retreat. But if teens are given too little free time, they may become distracted and misbehave. A good rule of thumb to follow is that the longer the retreat, the more free time and breaks need to be scheduled. Organized Free Time and Breaks + Snack Breaks Fifteen- to thirty-minute breaks for drinks and snacks. + Activity Breaks Fifteen- to thirty-minute breaks for a change of pace: noncompetitive games, structured outdoor or gym time, competitive games between small groups—board games, card games not connected to gambling, friendly games of volleyball, basketball, and so on. Non-organized Free Time and Breaks * After-Meal Breaks Fifteen- to thirty-minute breaks to allow time to freshen up, do after-meal clean-up, and take restroom breaks. + Free Time ‘Thirty-minute to wo-hour breaks to nap, go to the gym, play games, watch a movie, have a snack. Note: For free time or breaks, be sure to list options for activities and give guidelines as needed. During a weekend retreat, allow for a longer period of free time on Saturday. Weather and facility permitting, encourage teens to spend some time outside. Announcements Itis important to provide basic information before sending participants into an activity or break. Announcements should be short, to the point, and made at appropriate times. For example, at the beginning of the meal, you might need to announce that no one is to leave the dining arca until announcements are made. Then, at the end of the meal, you can announce what time participants are to meet and where, what group is responsible for meal clean-up, and options for activities. Note: Sometimes it helps to have the participants repeat the meeting time to you before they leave for their break. Be YSs Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models 15FOCUS AREA #2—MESSAGE ‘The message is the heart of the retreat. Because we all learn in different ways and at different paces, use a variety of methods to present the message. Make use of presentations, activities, dramas, skits, listening, singing, discussing, observing, writing, and other creative approaches of your own. Things to Keep in Mind + ‘Use the length of the retreat to determine the number and variety of methods to include. Be realistic. Resist the urge to add activities just because they ate good or enriching. + Focus on the message. Make sure the message remains consistent when you combine different methods. + Activities provide experiences that lead (o understanding, Quiet activities provide.time for participants to reflect on what they are learning, time to be with God, end an atmosphere that encourages all to share. Methods Presentations Use brief structured talks to convey specific information on a particular topic. Any qualified member of the retreat team can give these presentations. Witness Talks ‘Witness talks, usually between fifteen and thirty minutes long, support factual presentations with personal stories of faith. Anyone involved in the retreat may be invited to prepare and give a witness talk. Encourage teens to participate. For suggestions on preparing witness talks, see Appendix page 74. Things to Naan taMind + Presentations and witness talks should have a scriptural focus. Select at leust one passage from Scripture that connects with the retreat’s message or is the basis of the message.. "This passage should be read and referred to during presentations and witness talks. + Speaking in the first person (“T’) will keep presentations and witness talks from becoming preachy. + Presentations should include examples of firsthand personal experience. People listen ‘more carefully when we share our own stories with them. These stories should fit the theme of ie pesemation of vines alk; and they shouldbe trae."T6 use a popular” expression, teens can" me a phony a mieFilm and Video Use these effective teaching tools to: + Introduce the theme of the retreat. + Enhance a talk or teaching. + Emphasize a point. Panel of Speakers Invite a panel of speakers to share their lived experience on the retreat theme, The speakers can ‘present information or personal testimony or take questions ftom retreat participants. This approach can challenge and broaden participants’ views. Skits Having participants create skits, dramas, role-playing situations, and radio ané television commercials can deepen learning, support the retreat theme, build community, set the mood for another activity, or provide an outlet for energy or a means of entertainment, << Stories ‘Use stories to: = Introduce a retreat theme or activity. * Convey a message. = Emphasize a point. + Set a mood. = Make connections between the retreat theme and lived experience. Strategies and Teen-Tested ModelsSources for stories include: + Poms * Fiction + Songs * Children’s stories + Stories from real life + Stories from magazines and + Stories written by teens newspapers ‘You'll find twenty-five stories, complete with questions for reflection and journaling, in Making Connections: 25 Stories for Sharing Faith with Teens. Sce Appendix page 96. Sending Forth ‘Al the end of a retreat, it is important to wrap up the experience for the teens and to “send them forth.” This wrap-up serves to: + Summarize the message of the retreat, + Challenge participants to act on the retreat message. + Help participants to own the experience and grow from it. ‘This can be done by creating a ritual or activity with the sending forth in mind or by asking participants to take turns sharing their reactions to the retreat. 18 Retreats for TeFOCUS AREA #3—RESPONSE Offering activities to help participants respond to the message of the retreat helps to deepen the message in their hearts. This also gives teens the opportunity to begin thinking of ways to make practical changes in their lives. Giving teens the message “Just say ‘No’ ” to deal with the issue of premarital sex doesn’t help them to develop the skill to do so, The message would be much more effective if it were supported by exercises to help teens gain the necessary skills to put the message into practice in their lives. Here are examples of activities to help teens respond to a message. Reflection Questions Reflection questions are a good tool to help young people focus on and relate a message to their own lives. The most effective reflection questions are open-ended and prepared ahead of time. Use reflection questions: + after a presentation or witness talk. before a topic is to be discussed. + inconjunction with a video or portion of a video. + 10 stimulate small-group discussion. Journaling Journaling is a good way for young people to create a record of their responses. If you plan to include journaling in the retreat schedule, be sure to provide notebooks. If the budget will allow it, provide attractive notebooks that teens will find appealing and that they will want to keep. [ find it works well to give teens time for journaling after a presentation or witness talk, just before they go into their small groups for discussion. Provide reflection questions and ask teens to respond to these questions in their journals. ‘You may want to use a joumaling activity to open a weekend retreat. Give each participant a journal ornotebook. Ask each to write the name and date of the retreat on the first page. For the first journal entry, ask each teen to write about the gift he or she would like to receive from the Lord by the end of the retreat—a better self-image, a deeper assurance of God’s love, and so on, Then ask teens to journal about how they need to cooperate with the Lord in order to receive this gift. Before they begin writing, point out that they will need to be open to and involved in the retreat experience. When leading a retreat, ike to share with teens these thoughts, which I heard on my first retreat: ‘A retreat isn’t something that is done to you, it is something that involves you. What you put into a retreat is what you get out of it. Be sure to ask teens to review this journal entry at the ond of the retreat to evaluate how open they allowed themselves to be to the retreat and to the possibility of receiving the gifs they want. Be sensitive to the fact that, at the end of the retreat, teens may or may not feel that they have received these gifts. You may need to point out that the Lord may still be giving these gifts to them. They may need to continue to be open to receiving the gifis, in the Lord’s time and in the Lord's way. Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models 19Letters to Jesus Ask young people to write letters to Jesus about the areas of their lives that were addressed by a presentation or activity. Consider giving teens an opening line to help them get started. After a presentation or activity on self-image, you may ask teens to begin their letters to Jesus with this or a similar sentence: Dear Jesus, When t look at myself in a mirror, what I see is... Writing letters to Jesus can also be part of a reconciliation service. Teens can focus on telling Jesus about the ways in which they have sinned and asking him for forgiveness. Note: Writing these letters in 4 reconciliation service should never take the place of or be seen as equivalent to celebrating the sacrament of Penance Large-Group Sharing Some retreat themes and presentations lend themselves to large-group sharing. Successful large- group sharing requires advance preparation. Prepare open-ended questions that will challenge the young people to be candid. Encourage all to participate. Another way to prepare for large-group discussion is to have young people write and turn in questions anonymously. This can free young people to ask questions without fear of embarrassment. You will want to read the questions before you use them with the group. Because the questions are anonymous, some young people may write questions with some shock value. For large-group sharing on sensitive topics, such as sexuality or relationships, have participants form two same-sex groups. Ask each group to write their questions and put them into a box for separate discussions. Before using the questions for large-group sharing, sort them into topic areas. Tusually make copies of the questions for members of the retreat team. Then during a break, the team meets to review the questions. We diseuss questions that we feel we might have trouble answering. If we can, we try to find answers for these questions. If there are questions that we can't answer, we admit that to the group. We volunteer to find the answers after the retreat and invite teens to contact us later. Small-Group Sharing Small groups can provide an atmosphere that encourages teens to share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences about the main messages of the retreat. For successful small-group sharing, form the groups at the beginning of the retreat. Try to split friendship groups to encourage teens to get to know other participants. Allow teens and leaders to remain in the same small groups for the duration of the retreat. Ideally, small groups should have a minimum of five members and a maximum of nine members, with competent and caring adults or young adults serving as leaders. Ideally, these leaders should be trained in directing small groups. Tis also very beneficial to have trained peer leaders serve as co-leaders. Small-group leaders should participate as well as lead the groups, Small groups are effective in processing the message of the retreat. The most important questions involved in the message will probably be handled in small groups, Prepare open-ended questions that will challenge the young people. 20 Retreats for Teens‘Begin with an introductory small-group activity to build community and trust and to help participants and leaders get to know one another. Things to Keep i w Mind “+ Introduce the retreat director and retrest team members, ‘+ Establish the small-group leaders’ authority, + Make sure everyone is comfortable. Group members should be seated on the same level, ‘either on chairs oF on the floor, able to make eye contact with one another. Make sure no ‘one is sitting outside of the group. + Encourage all—teaders and participants—to relax and be themselves. + Set guidelines for sharing, ideally allowing participants lo suggest at least some of these. ‘For example, anything shared in the small group is not to be repeated Outside that group, _ unless permission is given to do so. : + Enoourage all members of the group to make a commitment to following the guidelines, ‘You may even want to have group members sign simple contracts, promising to observe “these guidelines, ‘+ Leaders need to stimulate discussion and invite everyone to participate without dominating the discussion, *+ Leaders should be as open to sharing as they ae encouraging members of their group to be. + Aleays open and elose the small-gronp shacing with prayer. Encourage group members to take tums offering simple spontaneous prayers. : ‘Noie: If, during small-group sharing, a group oe that a teen is dealing with a harmful or potentially harmful situation, the leader needs to handle the information in a responsible manner that respects confidentiality. The group leader will probably want to speak privately with the teen to verify the information, but should not promise to keep secret the situation or the identity of the teen involved. In fact, the group leader is responsible for making sure that there is an appropriate follow-up. He or she should encourage the teen to talk to the retreat director. If the retreat director is not the parish contact for the retreat group, then the Jetrea director is responsible for finding the proper conact and making sure that appropriate action is ee and provide help. Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested ModelsPersonal Prayer Time Isce a great benefit in providing time for personal prayer, especially on a weekend retreat. Personal Prayer can take many forms and be either directed or undirected. It is helpful to give a brief presentation on prayer and to suggest prayer options the teens could try. For prayer options, see Appendix pages 76 and 81. Emmaus Walk Luke 24:13-35 is the scriptural basis for this activity. In this passage, two men are walking on the road to Emmaus, talking about the death of Jesus when the resurrected Christ joins them and they fail to recognize him, Have the young people pair up, and give each pair a question designed to help them share with each other how the message of a presentation applies to them. Before sending the pairs off on an actual walk, give them guidelines for where to walk and how to share. For cxample, for ten minutes, one person interviews and the other person answers the question, Then when they turn around and walk back, the partners switch roles. Before the pairs begin their walk, offer a brief prayer asking Christ to walk with them as he did with the two men on the road to Emmaus. Dramas and Skits Use dramas and skits to help teens respond to a message. Here’s an example of how a skit can support other methods of responding to the message, | 2 Theme of Retreat: Unity in the Body of Christ Presentation: Based on 1 Corinthians 12, Response: Silent reflection and journaling on reflection questions based on the presentation. Response: Small-group discussion of the reflection questions Response: Small groups work to create skits on unity. Each group can take a different focus on unity—school, family, friendship group, community, Church community, Hands-on Activities Participating in hands-on activities can help teens gain insights into themselves and share these insights with those around them. When you're considering using a hands-on activity, ask: + Is the activity just keeping us busy, or is it helping to deepen the message within us? + Is the space available conducive to doing this activity? + Are the materials readily available? + Will there be a cost involved in doing this activity? If so, do we have the financial resources to cover the cost? Here are suggestions for hands-on activities. + Draw it, (Draw an image that depicts the retreat message for you.) + Mold it. (Make a symbol of the retreat message out of modeling clay.) * Write it. (Write a poem, prayer, personal creed, or story that expresses the message for you.) nS TSE Sw 2 Retreats for TeensFOCUS AREA #4—PRAYER AND WORSHIP Prayer and worship are significant parts of any retreat experience. Opportunities for prayer and worship help to build community within the group, and participants’ personal contributions bring a sense of ownership to prayer experiences. Prayer can be as simple as a meal prayer, taking time to thank God for food as nourishment and to acknowledge food as a blessing. Prayer can be more elaborate, involving, for example, a reconciliation service. Some prayer experiences may need to be prepared well in advance, as with a reconciliation service. Other prayer and prayer experiences can be prepared by participants during the retreat, Participants, either as individuals or in groups, can be responsible for meal prayers and portions of prayer services or Liturgies. Use these questions to guide your planning of prayer and worship experiences for a retreat. + What prayer experiences do we want or need to have? + Whom do we need to make this happen? (If the retreat team wants to include a reconciliation service that involves celebrating the sacrament of Penance or if the team wants the retreat group to celebrate a Liturgy, the team will need to make sure that a priest will be available.) + Have we contacted and scheduled all the people we will need to help us? + What materials and supplies will we need for our prayer experiences? + Are we using music in an order of worship? (If so, the team will need to request copyright permission or contact the parish liturgist to see whether the parish has contracts with music publishers that will allow reprinting music.) Here are some suggestions for prayer experiences for retreats. Meditation and Journey Prayer ‘This type of prayer experience requires that participants relax their bodies, close their eyes, and use their imaginations to take a journey through prayer. The journey will help participants look at various questions and situations in their lives. In most prayer journeys, participants meet Jesus, who speaks to them, asks them questions, or has them think about issues. Participants imagine how they would respond to Jesus. ‘When the meditation or prayer journey is over, participants process ) their experience. I find it beneficial to have them journal about their experience before they discuss it. If you choose to ask participants . J to do this, have journaling questions posted where everyone can see them. Many resources provide meditations and journey prayers, including Paths of Prayer: A Textbook of Prayer and Meditation. See Appendix page 96. é ™ Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models 23PRAYERS AND BLESSINGS Opening Prayer A retreat usually opens with a prayer or prayer service that inchides a clear statement of the theme and Scripture readings that support the theme. Within the opening prayer, you may want to ask for a blessing upon all who are gathered for the retreat Closing Prayer Close the retreat with a prayer or prayer service that reviews the theme of the retreat, repeats the Supporting Scripture, and summarizes the message of the retreat, Send all forth with a blessing, Prayer Before a Presentation Begin presentations by asking all to join you in prayer for the person who is speaking and for those who are listening. Prayers for the Retreat Team As the team meets to plan the retreat and before the retreat begins, gather the retreat team for prayer. Schedule time for the team to pray together during a weekend or overnight retreat. Small-Group Prayer Encourage small groups to open and close with a prayer each time they meet Meal Prayers Ask for volunteers to lead meal prayers. Team members can work with the volunteers to make them feel mote comfortable. Encourage teens to use “fun” prayers they may have learned at summer camp or at youth ministry gatherings, PRAYER SERVICES On overnight or weekend retreats, begin and close each day with community prayer times, You will probably want to include music, activities, and Seripture. Here's an example of a format for morning prayer that includes community building, movement to wake people up, and direction for moving into the next activity. * To get teens to move out of their friendship groups, begin with an icebreaker game such as “Back-to-Back, People-to-People” from Getting Started: 100 Icebreakers for Youth Gaiherings, Sce Appendix page 96, * After a minute or two, ask the partners to do a “mirror activity.” Suggest an activity to be acted out; peeling a banana, for example. Then have one partuer act out the activity while the other partner, as the mirror reflection, tries to repeat what his or her partner is doing as exactly as possible. Give both partners a chance to be the mirror reflection, * Ask partners to sit facing each other, closing their eyes, and holding each other’s hands, Each partner prays silently for his or her partner, who accepts the prayer. * Include a Scripture reading that fits with the activities of the upcoming day. * The retreat director or a member of the retreat team closes by praying out loud for the goals of the day. 24 Retreats for TeensHere’s an example of an evening prayer that relaxes and quicts people. By having people praying for one another, they are also building community. the Living Rosary Ask the group to sit in a circle, + Have members of the retreat team take turns leading the decades of the rosary, ‘+ The leader begins the decade with the Our Father. Teens pass a candle to symbolize Christ’s presence. The candle is passed before each Hail Mary. The person who has received the candle asks the group to pray for a specific intention, prays the Hail Mary, and passes the candle. The leader closes the decade with the Glory Be to the Father. + The leader of the next decade begins with the Our Father, and the process is repeated. + Ifthere are fewer than fifty people in the group, each person may receive the candle twice. If there are more than fifty people in the group, each person should still receive the candle once and have a chance to voice a prayer intention. Scripture Provide opportunities for young people to enter into Scripture by studying it, praying with it, and reflecting on it. Use these questions to guide your use of Scripture. + Will this be a small-group or large-group activity? + What Scripture will we use? + Will you begin or follow up with a presentation on the Scripture? + After teens have prayed and reflected on the Scripture, do you want them to share with partners? In their small groups? In the lange group? Here’s an example of an activity that encourages teens to work with Scripture. For a reproducible handout for teens, see Appendix page 76, ens of the Spirit + Begin with a brief prayer, asking the Holy Spirit to guide the group in reflecting on what the Lord is telling us in the Scripture. + Read or have a volunteer read the Scripture passage. + Reread the passage slowly. Ask teens to imagine that they are present at the scene in which the Scripture takes place. + Allow a minute or two for teens to reflect on what is said and done in the Scripture. + Ask teens to journal their responses to these questions. ‘What is the image of God I see in this passage? ‘With what person or event do I identify most in this passage? In this passage, what do I feel the Lord is telling me? Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested Models 28 ey SeepLiturgical Prayer In preparing liturgical prayers, give attention to the norms and guidelines established for theit celebration. When planning a Mass or a reconciliation service that includes celebration of the sacrament of Penance, it is helpful if the priest is involved in the planning or is at least aware and accepting of what is planned. + Reconciliation and Healing Services Because the purpose of reconciliation and healing services is to allow Christ's love to free people from the barriers and burdens they bring to the retreat, these services are appropriate to any retreat, no matter what the theme. + Eucharistic Liturgy Celebrating Mass together can be a memorable experience for a group gathered for a retreat. The retreat team can plan the Mass before or during the retreat. If you decide to plan the Mass during the retreat, you can involve everyone in the planning. The small groups can take responsibility for different areas of the planning: music, environment, writing prayers of the faithful, writing prayers of thanksgiving, preparing and doing the readings, preparing and distributing an order of worship. You will need to consult with the priest during the planning, d 0 26 Retreats for TeensFOCUS AREA #5—FOLLOW-UP ‘A retreat is just a beginning, the place for new growth to start, This growth needs to be encourazed, To keep a retreat from becoming an isolated event, plan follow-up activities and events as you the retreat, Integrate these activities into the existing parish youth ministry programming or the high school campus ministry plan. Evaluations Requiring participants—both team members and teens—to do an evaluation provides a way to determine whether the purpose and objectives of the retreat have been accomplished. Honest evaluations will enable planners to enhance the next retreat experience. For a sample of an evaluation, see Appendix page 85. Things to Keepin Mind = The most beneficial evaluations ate written and anonymous. In general, anonymity allows for honest responses. Be aware, however, that anonymity also allows some teens {0 take an immature approach to the evaluations. + Some negative comments will need to be taken with a grain of salt, but negative comments should not be ignored. i + The value of conflicting comments will need to be weighed by retreat team members. For ‘example, one toon may think there was too little free time given. Another feen may think there was too much free time. ‘The retreat team should be able to set these two comments. into perspective. a + Receiving one or two negative evaluations does not mean the retreat was not effective. Here are suggestions for other follow-up activities. Letters ‘Near the end of the retreat, have young people write letters to themselves. Ask them to include their thoughts about what they are taking with them from the experience—what they want to remember, how they have grown, how they experienced God, and other thoughts they want to include, Assure them that no one will see their letters. When everyone has had a chance to finish writing, provide envelopes for their letters, Ask teens to address the envelopes to themselves and seal them. Collect the envelopes and tell teens that you will mail their letters to them in about four months. Follow-up Letters About two months after the retreat, send letters to those who participated. Personalize the letters if you can, Include stories of things that happened on the retreat and copies of the group picture if one was taken, Restating the theme of the retreat may help to remind participants of the challenges presented during the retreat and the growth they experienced. It would be ideal if these letters could also serve 1s invitations to or reminders of a follow-up event. The letters could be sent via snail mail or e-mail. Planning Strategies and Teen-Tested ModelsFollow-up Activities * Pizza Panty Have a gathering a few weeks after the retreat to Provide an opportunity for participants to socialize and for you to announce the schedule of follow-up activities, * Bible Study and Faith-Sharing Groups Offer teens the chance to participate in Bible study or faith-shating ‘groups. You will want to plan for these groups while you are planning the retreat so that you can snnooace tentative schedules + Day of Recollection As you are planning the retreat, plan a day of recollection to follow-up on the retreat. Announce this event at the end of the retreat. * Youth Group {there isan active youth group in your parish, invite members ofthe retreat group to participate, IE there is no youth group, invite reteat participants to meet after the retreat to make plans for beginning a youth group * Catechetical Programs Ifthe retreat is part of your catechetical programming, consider how you can build on tor follow itup Thinterest in a particular topic surfaced on the evaluations, consider addressing that topic in future catechetical programming. meaningful activities for youth within the Parish, Retreats for Teens