How to text girls [Guide + Personal tips]

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I want to start by saying if you want to get better at texting girls (or get better at almost anything)
you have put in the reps (practice). If you aren't willing to fail, task risks and put in the time to try
new things then this isn't the guide for you.
Disclaimer: This guide is not a quick fix that will make every girl fall in love with you through text
guide, it's a this is how I think it should be done and how I get success with texting girls guide.

Why do we text?
Texting is a form of communication to stay in contact with someone. Texting isn't meant for
"getting to know people" that's what dates are for. Face to Face interactions will always be better
than texting. You should be texting to set up dates, build interest between you and a girl. You
shouldn't be having a full conversation through text, you should be saving that for when you're in
person.

When do I text a girl after getting her number?

I highly recommend not waiting longer than a day or two. If you wait too long (3+ days) she may
think you're not interested or even worst forget about you. If you text her the same day you may
come off as desperate or needy. During the evening time is usually best to text someone.

What should my first text be?

"Hey, what's up" or "hey how are you" are some of the worst first texts that you can send. They
are basic and overused. If she replies that text then it will lower the initial interest level she had
and it will leave more work for you to do later. You want to reference something she bought up
when you first met her. If she talked about how she thrifted her outfit and she enjoys going to the
thrift store. Your first text could be something like "where was the thrift store you mentioned
earlier? I want to check it out"
Jokes, memes are anything clever things you can think of is also good. Don't overthink it. With
the first text, you just want to give her something to reply to. Don't text her anything like "hey do
you remember me from blah blah blah?" when you first met her you should have also given her
your number to avoid the awkward "hey, who's this." If still get a who's this after you told her to
save your number. I wouldn't even text back because she's not interested enough or doesn't
care.

What should I do after the first text?

If she replies I would assume her interest level is about 40% to 90%. If she's already at 90% then
just don't have to tell her dumb things like you're not over your ex, you're a bum and you're an
emotional wreck. If she's already at 90% this part is about laying a strong foundation. If she's less
than 60% you have some work to do. You need to get her to at least 70% to reduce flaking. HoW
Do i KNoW WhAt % iS ShE At? we'll get to that. If she's doesn't text back after the first text
deletes the number and move on. Work on your approach and focus on building a better
connection next time.
At this part, you want to ask questions during the "warming up" phrase. These are essential to
building enough trust and comfort, so she'll be more than willing to go on date with you. You want
her excited to get it to know you and see you face to face. These questions are where you start
screening her and seeing if you're even interested in her. Remember you are the prize and she
should also be trying to earn this date with you. Don't try to take her on a date just to take a girl
out on a date. You don't need to take girls on dates to get laid. Dates with no excitement or spark
end in the friend zone or your texts will get ignored after the date.

What do I do during the "warming up" phase?

You need to ask her that ask where is she from, Where does she do for a living, if she goes to
school ask what's her major. Ask where has she traveled. If she doesn't travel ask where she
wants to go. Everyone has a story and everyone wants to travel. She should be excited to tell you
these things if she's interested in you. There must some type of back and forth. If she's not asking
questions back her interest level is too low. During this process, you need to make mental notes
and notice what she is receptive too. Do you best to make sure they are open-ended questions.
There's a difference between "what's it like growing up in California?" and "Where did you grow
up?"
(if you already asked these questions before you got her number, good conversation starters can
be about things you remember her mentioning. You can skip a lot of the warming phase if your
approach was good, but you still want to screen her, before asking for a date)
The part when you're asking her questions is to make conversations out the questions. Again
there should be a good back and forth. You should be making jokes and asking questions about
things that genuinely interest you about her. Most importantly you should be flirting and finding
out what you have in common. When you find out things you share in common make that a topic.
If you both like books. See if you like the same books and authors. Ask her to recommend a
book. Find out what her favorite books are etc. etc. Don't agree with everything she says or try to
say you like all of the same things. Be genuine and don't be scared to disagree.

How do I flirt over text?

Use emojis. I'm serious. Texting is disingenuous and emotionless. 🥰😍😘😏😉❤️🔥🍆 you know
what these mean and she knows what they mean. These make it obvious that you're flirting with
her and that you're interested in her. Emojis convey emotions (in a way) you want her to feel a
certain way about you and this one way to do it.
Use words like "us" "we" and "together" if you use these world you let her you want to be with her.
If she doesn't like it when you use these words her interest level is too low drop her and move on.
If she says that she's hungry you should joke that she could come over to eat because you cook
a good microwave dinner. Allude that you want to meet up and hang out together.
Tease her. You don't want to be like every other guy texting how beautiful and sexy she is. Make
fun of something and do in a nonhurtful way using emoji can help show that you're only joking.
Don't say mean things or talk about things she's insecure about just make a light joke.
If she's flirting back and doing the same things like teasing and using emojis back her interest
level could be anywhere from 70% to 90%. When you feel like her interest level is at least 70%
then you should be asking her out on a date. Can you ask a girl out on a date if she's at 40% or
60% yes, but the chances of her flaking will be very high.

How do I ask her out on a date?

First, you need a plan for the date. If you've been asking her questions and learning things about
her you should know what would interest you both. Day one of texting you should already be
thinking of a date plan. My go-to dates: if she's competitive I'll choose the arcade, mini-golf, or
dave & busters. If she's into music/artisy I'll choose a piano bar, the museum or people-watching
at the karaoke bar. you want to have a few options on where you want to take her out to.You
want to ask when you feel like her interest level is peaked.
You also want to have an idea of when, and where. If your texting has been solid you should
know what her schedule is like. If she likes you she will have no problem telling you what her
schedule is like. When you ask it should be something like "I know you said you've always
wanted to try Chinese food, how about WE (keyword) go this restaurant I know across town on
Tuesday?" You want to go to multiple places on the first date. Give her a fun experience. Keep
the first dates cheap and do your research on free activities in your area.
You want her to reply with "Yes! I would love to meet up with you at blah blah blah on Thursday."
Some bad replies: "I'm too busy" or "I'll let you know" or "ill think about it." If you get any of these
you probably asked too late or too early and I recommended just not texting her again unless she
texts first. I want to add there's a difference between "I'll let you know when I'm free" and "I get
my work schedule on Wednesday, so I'll know then" girls that are eager for the date or happy you
ask usually have very high interest.
After asking her on the date you will need to remember to send a confirmation text. "We still down
for bowling at 7?" and if she says yes then get prepared for your date. If you get a "ummmm I
don't know now" then you're getting a little last-minute resistance. Tell her that's she'll have fun
and there's no pressure. "we are just gonna grab a drink and chat" claim her down and don't
allow her to overthink. Don't allow yourself to come off as angry or flustered.

what do I text after the date?

Don't text her immediately text after the date. It will come off as needy and desperate. Wait until
she texts after the first date. if she doesn't text in 3 days prepare to get friend-zoned. if you text
her first and she doesn't reply prepared to get friend-zoned. On day 3 after the date, you should
text her and make a joke something you talked about on the date or start a new conversation. If
she had fun on the date she'll let you know and you should start planning the next one.
Don't ask if she had a good time on the date.If she says she had a good time that means she'll
want to see you again and from now on you must stay consistent with your texting. if you text her
10 to 20 times every couple days keep it at that rate. You don't want to start texting her less and
making her overthink or think that you're boring. Again don't an open book and share everything
about you. Have some mystery to yourself to keep her interest high.

What do I do if she flakes on the date?

Context matters in this situation. If she goes radio silent for days, then don't reply if she texts you
again. She has no respect for you. If she says "I have an exam or group project" or anything
dealing with work/school then try to reschedule. Don't immediately assume she's lying or get
mad. Some girls just get nervous and need a few more days to mentally prepare. Emergencies
do happen, and shit does happen. it's no big deal. If you have to reschedule don't slip up by
making yourself seem too available and trying to plan another then and there, give it a day or two.

How do I know her interest %?

if she replies quickly, asks you questions and make conversations flow well/makes them fun -
70% to 90%
short text and long periods between - 40% - for these situations try to text her again in a couple of
days. If she still takes forever to reply drop her
Leaves you on read - 0% - move on and drop her - if she leaves you on read more then once she
doesn't respect you. move on
Texts you first - 90% - you should be closing or asking her on a date the same day
Doesn't text first and barely replies when you do text - 40% to 0% - drop her and move on
Doesn't text first, but has great conversations when you do text - 60% - don't ask her on a date
until you feel like her interest is around 70% to 80%
one word replies - 0% - stop texting her and move on
she randomly sends pictures of herself - 90% - you should be asking her on a date quickly
if she replies to with exclamation marks and emojis. - 80% - she excited or happy that you texted
her. You should be asking her out on a date.

TEXTING DON'TS:
Do not text her all day. You don't want to think of you as one of her girlfriends or texting buddies.
The goal of texting is to keep her interested and meet up with her. Leave some mystery to
yourself make her have to see you if she wants to get to know the good stuff about you.
Don't text her "hey, what's up?" if you've done it once don't do it again. When you text her have a
plan and topics. "Hey, how are you" and "what are you doing" can hard to form conversations out
of it. If you make a habit out of it when will she stop replying to you.
reply with a one-word text. If you're ending a conversation that's okay but you don't want to make it
hard for her to reply.
Don't go overboard with the emojis one or two is all you need.
Don't go into interview mode. When you're asking questions don't ask a lot of them back to back.
Ask questions that lead to conversations.stay away from questions like "tell me about yourself" or
"what do you like to do for fun?" ask about things that interest you. Ask about things that matter to
you. Make assumptions to create conversations.
"Whenever you're free" don't EVER EVER EVER leave it up to her to the set the plans. You will
come off as too available. Girls want you to have a plan. If she's not free the day you have
planned then try to reschedule a day you're both free. Again if she likes you she'll let know when
she's free.
Don't text girls for longer than a week and a half without a date planned. Don't let her "I'll let you
know" or "we'll see" you forever. Look at a girl's actions. If she flakes more than once or doesn't
reply to the question when you ask her out on a date then stop texting her. If she's interested
she'll want to go on a date.
Long text. If it's a long paragraph reply leave it for when you're on the date or just call her. (Yes,
girls still like it when you call them.) 3 to 5 sentences max. You don't want to give her too many
questions to answer at once and you don't want her not to be able to interpret all you're saying.
Keep it short, sweet and to the point.
Double texting. have no shame in double texting if it's during a conversation. If you text her, hey
and she's doesn't reply don't text her hey again. it's over. move on.
Don't ask deep questions. Leave that for in person. Don't ask about her opinion of the current state
of the world. Don't ask her to explain if she thinks there are flaws in Einstein's theory of relativity.
This can creep her out or just lead to long messages that can get misinterpreted.
Don't text girls that frustrate you. if she's making you mad through text it's your fault for not deleting
her number yet. Stop acting entitled. she doesn't have to text you back. Move on and work on
yourself. Don't sit around waiting for a reply and stay busy by doing other things.
Don't text her basic stuff like: good morning, hey beautiful, you there?, ???, don't send dick pick,
etc.

PERSONAL TIPS
I highly recommend texting more than one girl. I'm not saying text more than one at a time. I'm
saying have multiple girls to text. A minimum of 3. Let's say you want a girl you want to invite a
girl to come over to watch a movie. You text girl #1 and she doesn't reply. instead of getting angry
and having an emotional response you text girl #2. Girl number #2 says sorry I'm busy, but let's
go to the movies on Tuesday at 8. Then let's say you text girl #3 and she says I would love to
come over and watch a movie. Instead of getting annoyed/feeling frustrated, you got a date and a
girl to come over to watch a movie.
When you have more than one girl to text you instantly get more relaxed. you're able to take more
risks because you have more girls in your life. Clinginess and neediness are some most
unattractive qualities you can have to a girl. You should be doing anything that makes you less
needy.
Since I mentioned taking a risk you should have any shame in turning conversations sexual. You
must take risks with girls. If you're not trying to flirt or ask her on a date you will get friend zoned.
When you're on the date you should be trying to hold hands and kiss. The risks create sexual
tension and the spark that girls are looking for.
You should be working towards being able to FaceTime with her (if you have an iPhone of
course) it’s a great way to connect. If she gets the point to where she wants to sit on FaceTime
with you and just looks at you all day, then you’re in a very good position. Facetiming can be a
good replacement for texting. I recommend facetiming once she feeling comfortable with you after
met up with her a couple of times.
Send Memes. Memes can be funny and every better they can be relatable. The more things you
find that that you both have in common the better. Having a similar sense of humor is a good
thing to find out. Sending memes can also be a way to turn conversations sexual.
Don't waste your time. If she takes forever to reply or rarely does at all delete her number. If she
leaves you on read multiple times delete her number. Stop wasting your time on girls that aren't
interested. Go out and find girls that are interested. Most of you guys don't have bad "text game"
you're texting girls THAT AREN'T INTERESTED. When a girl is interested in you she will make
things easy.
Don't be overly persistent with girls. Take it from a guy that used to pride himself on "not giving up
on girls" you don't want to force the attraction. You give up too much power and you only get
desperate girls. You attract what you are. Have self-respect and don't blow up her phone trying to
get her to like you. Even if you get her out on a date it will be out of pity or boredom.
Make texting fun! Too many guys try to hard to entertain girls through text. Let things flow and
don't overthink your texts. Say what comes to your mind. Talk about things you want to talk
about. If she wants to talk about things then she'll bring up new topics. Make yourself laugh.
entrain yourself. Too many guys put to much pressure on themselves to always have the perfect
text. Just text her.

Getting reps: in the beginning, I mentioned getting reps and practicing. I got the majority of my
texting skills sending 1000s texts a month in middle school/high school. I also got my practice in
other ways.
imvu - this "game" is full of chat rooms and you get a 3D avatar that you can customize. I learned
how to flirt and roast here. I spent a couple of years here making online friends and getting
"girlfriends"
Skout, pof - these are dating sites that I recommend because you don't have to get matched with
a girl to message her.
chatroulette, omegle - both link you up with random strangers to video chat with or message with.
I want you to use these sites and get practice. Don't just talk to girls talk to everyone. When you
talk to a girl learn how to start a conversation and see how receptive she is when you flirt. if you
say something creepy or weird trust me she'll stop replying, but they are low-pressure situations
to experiment. on the dating sites don't message local girls if you're not ready. Message girls
100s of miles away. Trust me a lot of girls on there will like the attention you give them. The best
way to learn is by failing. It's much easier to figure out what doesn't work than what does work.
As you're messaging girls I want you to focus on developing to-go topics. Learn what you like to
talk about and what girls like to talk about. Maybe after experimenting, you'll find out plenty of
girls like talking about video games and sports. You might find out girls don't like talking about
dinosaurs or evolutionary psychology.

Conclusion
Don't ever send emotionally charged messages to girls. Women can be too nice and do a lot to
protect the fragile male ego. Some girls are bad at texting and there are girls that are simply not
interested, but they like attention. Being able to tell this difference comes with experience.
This guide should help you waste less time texting girls and understand what you need to know.
Texting girls should be fun. You should be only texting girls that make it fun and reply. I've wasted
so much time texting girls that only wanted attention. I wasted so much time texting girls that I
was trying to force interest with. I wasted months texting girls, calling each other baby, just to get
friend-zoned after we finally went on a date. No one is "too busy" replying to a text takes 1 minute
tops. Don't waste a second thought on someone who won't give you a minute of their time.

EDIT: formatting.
I smiled many times while reading this long ass post..
Hi female here.. this is the most accurate thing I’ve ever read consisting of “how to: girls”. But I
would like to add a few things
1. To add on to the “don’t become an interviewer” part: when asking questions over text like
the examples given above, let that guide your conversation but don’t become focused on
asking questions. When you ask a question and it sparks up a conversation stay with that
topic until you one of you can’t think of a response/anything more to add..then go back to
asking another question and so on and so forth..
2. Almost every time I will wait for a guy to text me after a date bc to me that’s my way of
seeing if he’s interested or not.. unless I’m at 100% with him and want him to be my
boyfriend immediately, I’ll wait. But again that’s just me.
3. This might sound weird but if one of us stops responding without ending the conversation
(we fell asleep, etc.) that to me means they are the next one up to say something and
sometimes that helps instead of the “he/she never texts me first”.. if it’s open ended and I
didn’t respond then I’m up next!
4. I’ll be honest I can’t tell if I’m turned on or turned off that you’ve got “how to win a girl over”
down to a science lmao
5. Speaking from personal preference.. don’t use too many emojis! (And definitely not the
eggplant emoji right off the bat unless she is being overtly sexual) If it’s a text that could
use an emoji to better portray the tone behind it then by all means! But please do not put
an emoji or two in every. damn. text. It’s a bit “overzealous” and can turn a girl off.