THE MISER. (L'AVARE.

MOLIERE

PERSONS REPRESENTED

HARPAGON…………………………………….

CLEANTE………………………………………

ELISE…………………………………………..

VALERE ……………………………………….

LA FLECHE …………………………………..

MASTER SIMON …………………………….

MASTER JACQUES …………………………

FROSINE …………………………………..…

MARIANNE………………………………..….

BRINDAVOINE ………………………………

LA MERLUCHE ……………………………..

ANSELME…………………………………….
 THE MISER.
The scene is at PARIS, in HARPAGON'S house.

ACT I.

SCENE I.--VALERE, ELISE.

VALERE: What, dear Elise! you grow sad after having given me such dear tokens of
your love; Can you regret having made me happy?

ELISE: No, Valere, I do not regret what I do for you; Yet, to tell you the truth, I am very
anxious about the consequences; and I greatly fear that I love you more than I should.

VALERE: What can you possibly fear?

ELISE: Everything; the anger of my father, the reproaches of my family, the censure of
the world, and, above all, Valere, a change in your heart!

VALERE: Alas! Think me capable of everything, Elise, except of falling short of what I owe
to you.

ELISE: Ah! Valere, all men say the same thing; all men are alike in their words; their
actions only show the difference that exists between them.

VALERE: Then why not wait for actions, if by them alone you can judge of the truthfulness
of my heart? Do not suffer your anxious fears to mislead you, and to wrong me; but give me
time to show you by a thousand proofs the sincerity of my affection.

ELISE: Alas! I believe you; If I grieve, it will only be over the difficulties of our position,
and the possible censures of the world.

VALERE: But why even this fear?

ELISE: Oh, Valere! if everybody knew you as I do, I should not have much to fear. I find in
you enough to justify all I do for you; For me you neglect your parents and your country;
you give up your own position in life to be a servant of my father! How can I resist the
influence that all this has over me?

VALERE: You try in vain to find merit in what I have done; it is by my love alone that I trust to
deserve you. Of only I can find my parents they will soon be favourable to us. I am expecting
news of them with great impatience; but if none comes I will go in search of them myself.

ELISE: Oh no! Valere, do not leave me, I entreat you.

VALERE: Someone’s coming. I should go now, but not fot too long. Do not worry.

VALERE exits. Enters CLEANTE.

1
SCENE II.--CLEANTE, ELISE
CLEANTE: I am very glad to find you alone, sister. I longed to speak to you and to tell you
a secret.

ELISE: I am quite ready to hear you, brother. What is it you have to tell me?

CLEANTE: Many things, sister, summed up in one word--love.

ELISE: You love?

CLEANTE: Yes, I love. But, before I say more, let me tell you that I know I depend on my
father, and that the name of son subjects me to his will; that it would be wrong to engage
ourselves without the consent of the authors of our being; I know all this, my sister, and I tell
it you to spare you the trouble of saying it to me, for my love will not let me listen to
anything, and I pray you to spare me your remonstrances.

ELISE: Have you engaged yourself, brother, to her you love?

CLEANTE: No, but I have determined to do so; and I beseech you once more not to
bring forward any reason to dissuade me from it.

ELISE: Am I such a very strange person, brother?

CLEANTE: No, dear sister; but you do not love. You know not the sweet power that love
has upon our hearts; and I dread your wisdom.

ELISE: Alas! my brother, let us not speak of my wisdom. There are very few people in this
world who do not lack wisdom, were it only once in their lifetime; and if I opened my heart
to you, perhaps you would think me less wise than you are yourself.

CLEANTE: Ah! would to heaven that your heart, like mine....

ELISE: Let us speak of you first, and tell me whom it is you love.

CLEANTE: A young girl who has lately come to live in our neighbourhood, and who seems
made to inspire love in all those who behold her. Nature, my dear sister, has made nothing
more lovely; and I felt another man the moment I saw her. Her name is Marianne, and she
lives with a good, kind mother, who is almost always ill, and for whom the dear girl shows
the greatest affection. She waits upon her, pities and comforts her with a tenderness that
would touch you to the very soul.

ELISE: I see many things in what you tell me, dear brother; and it is sufficient for me to
know that you love her for me to understand what she is.

2
CLEANTE: They are not in very good circumstances and they have barely enough to cover
their expenses. Can you imagine, my sister, what happiness it must be to improve the
condition of those we love; skilfully to bring about some relief to the modest wants of a
virtuous family? And think what grief it is for me to find myself deprived of this great joy
through the avarice of a father, and for it to be impossible for me to give any proof of my
love to her who is all in all to me.

ELISE: Yes, I understand, dear brother, what sorrow this must be to you.

CLEANTE: It is greater, my sister, than you can believe. For is there anything more cruel
than this mean economy to which we are subjected? What good will it do us to have a
fortune if it only comes to us when we are not able to enjoy it; In short, I wanted to speak to
you that you might help me to sound my father concerning my present feelings; and if I find
him opposed to them, I am determined to go and live elsewhere with this most charming girl,
and to make the best of what Providence offers us. I am trying everywhere to raise money
for this purpose; and if your circumstances, dear sister, are like mine, and our father
opposes us, let us both leave him, and free ourselves from the tyranny in which his hateful
avarice has for so long held us.

ELISE: It is but too true that every day he gives us more and more reason to regret the death
of our mother, and that....

CLEANTE: I hear his voice. Let us go a little farther and finish our talk. We will
afterwards join our forces to make a common attack on his hard and unkind heart.

3
SCENE III.--HARPAGON, LA FLECHE.
HARPAGON: Get out of here, this moment; and let me have no more of your prating.
Now then, be gone out of my house, you sworn pickpocket, you veritable gallows' bird.

LA FLECHE: (_aside_). I never saw anything more wicked than this cursed old man; and
I truly believe, if I may be allowed to say so, that he is possessed with a devil.

HARPAGON: What are you muttering there between your teeth?

LA FLECHE: Why do you send me away?

HARPAGON: You dare to ask me my reasons, you scoundrel? Out with you, this
moment, before I give you a good thrashing.

LA FLECHE: What have I done to you? My master, your son, gave me orders to wait for him.

HARPAGON: Go and wait for him in the street, then; out with you; don't stay in my
house, straight and stiff as a sentry, to observe what is going on, and to make your profit
of everything.

LA FLECHE: How the deuce could one steal anything from you? Are you a man likely to
be robbed when you put every possible thing under lock and key, and mount guard day
and night?

HARPAGON: I will lock up whatever I think fit, and mount guard when and where I please.
Did you ever see such spies as are set upon me to take note of everything I do? Now,
aren't you a fellow to give rise to stories about my having money hid in my house?

LA FLECHE: You have some money hid in your house?

HARPAGON: No, scoundrel! I do not say that. I only ask if out of mischief you do not
spread abroad the report that I have some?

LA FLECHE: Oh! What does it matter whether you have money, or whether you have
not, since it is all the same to us?

HARPAGON: _(raising his hand to give LA FLECHE a blow)_. Oh! oh! You want to argue,
do you? I will give you, and quickly too, some few of these arguments about your ears. Get
out of the house, I tell you once more.

LA FLECHE: Very well; very well. I am going.

HARPAGON: No, wait; are you carrying anything away with you?

LA FLECHE: What can I possibly carry away?

HARPAGON: Come here, and let me see. Show me your hands.

4
LA FLECHE: There they are.

HARPAGON: The others.

LA FLECHE: The others? There they are.

HARPAGON: (_pointing to LA FLECHE'S breeches_). Have you anything hid in here?

LA FLECHE: Look for yourself.

HARPAGON: (feeling the knees of the breeches). These wide knee- breeches are
convenient receptacles of stolen goods; and I wish a pair of them had been hanged.

LA FLECHE: (aside). Ah! how richly such a man deserves what he fears, and what joy it
would be to me to steal some of his....

HARPAGON: Eh?

LA FLECHE: What?

HARPAGON: What is it you talk of stealing?

LA FLECHE: I say that you feel about everywhere to see if I have been stealing anything.

HARPAGON: And I mean to do so too. (_He feels in LA FLECHE'S pockets_).

LA FLECHE: Plague take all misers and all miserly ways!

HARPAGON: Eh? What do you say? What is it you say about misers and miserly ways.

LA FLECHE: I say plague take all misers and all miserly ways.

HARPAGON: Of whom do you speak?

LA FLECHE: Of misers.

HARPAGON: And who are they, these misers?

LA FLECHE: Villains and stingy wretches!

HARPAGON: But what do you mean by that?

LA FLECHE: Why do you trouble yourself so much about what I say?

HARPAGON: I trouble myself because I think it right to do so.

5
LA FLECHE: Do you think I am speaking about you?

HARPAGON: I think what I think; but I insist upon your telling me to whom you speak
when you say that.

LA FLECHE: To whom I speak? I am speaking to the inside of my hat.

HARPAGON: And I will, perhaps, speak to the outside of your head.

LA FLECHE: Would you prevent me from cursing misers?

HARPAGON: No; but I will prevent you from prating and from being insolent. Hold
your tongue, will you?

LA FLECHE: I name nobody.

HARPAGON: Another word, and I'll thrash you.

LA FLECHE: He whom the cap fits, let him wear it.

HARPAGON: Will you be silent?

LA FLECHE: Yes; much against my will.

HARPAGON: Ah! ah!

LA FLECHE: (showing HARPAGON one of his doublet pockets). Just look, here is one
more pocket. Are you satisfied?

HARPAGON: Come, give it up to me without all that fuss.

LA FLECHE: Give you what?

HARPAGON: What you have stolen from me.

LA FLECHE: I have stolen nothing at all from you.

HARPAGON: Are you telling the truth?

LA FLECHE: Yes.

HARPAGON: Good-bye, then, and now you may go to the devil.

LA FLECHE: (_aside_). That's a nice way of dismissing anyone.

HARPAGON: I leave it to your conscience, remember!

6
SCENE V.--_HARPAGON; ELISE and CLEANTE are seen talking together at the back of
the stage._
HARPAGON: (alone) Meanwhile, I hardly know whether I did right to bury in my garden
the ten thousand crowns which were paid to me yesterday. Ten thousand crowns in gold is
a sum sufficiently.... (ELISE and CLEANTE whisper) Good heavens! What do you want?

CLEANTE: Nothing, father.

HARPAGON: Have you been here long?

ELISE: We have only just come.

HARPAGON: Did you hear...?

CLEANTE: What, father?

HARPAGON: What I was just now saying.

CLEANTE: No.

HARPAGON: You did. I know you did.

ELISE: I beg your pardon, father, but we did not.

HARPAGON: I was only talking to myself about the trouble one has nowadays to raise
any money; and I was saying that he is a fortunate man who has ten thousand crowns in
his house. Would that I had them, these ten thousand crowns!

CLEANTE: I should not think that....

HARPAGON: What a capital affair it would be for me.

CLEANTE: There are things....

HARPAGON: I greatly need them.

CLEANTE: I fancy that....

HARPAGON: It would suit me exceedingly well.

ELISE: You are....

HARPAGON: And I should not have to complain, as I do now, that the times are bad.

7
CLEANTE: Dear father you have no reason to complain; and everyone knows that you
are well enough.

HARPAGON: How? Those who say it are liars. Nothing can be more false; and they
are scoundrels who spread such reports.

ELISE: Don't be angry.

HARPAGON: It is strange that my own children betray me and become my enemies.

CLEANTE: Is it being your enemy to say that you have wealth?

HARPAGON: Enough on this subject; let us talk of something else. (CLEANTE and
ELISE make signs to one another) What do you mean by those signs?

ELISE: We are hesitating as to who shall speak first, for we both have something to tell you.

HARPAGON: And I also have something to tell you both.

CLEANTE: We wanted to speak to you about marriage, father.

HARPAGON: The very thing I wish to speak to you about.

ELISE: Ah! my father!

HARPAGON: What is the meaning of that exclamation? Is it the word, daughter, or the
thing itself that frightens you?

CLEANTE: Marriage may frighten us both according to the way you take it; and our
feelings may perhaps not coincide with your choice.

HARPAGON: A little patience, if you please. You need not be alarmed. I know what is
good for you both. To begin at the beginning. (To CLEANTE) Do you know, tell me, a
young person, called Marianne, who lives not far from here?

CLEANTE: Yes, father.

HARPAGON: And you?

ELISE: I have heard her spoken of.

HARPAGON: Well, my son, and how do you like the girl?

CLEANTE: She is very charming.

HARPAGON: Her face?

8
CLEANTE: Modest and intelligent.

HARPAGON: Her air and manner?

CLEANTE: Perfect, undoubtedly.

HARPAGON: Do you not think that such a girl well deserves to be thought of?

CLEANTE: Yes, father.

HARPAGON: She would form a very desirable match?

CLEANTE: Very desirable.

HARPAGON: That there is every likelihood of her making a thrifty and careful wife.

CLEANTE: Certainly.

HARPAGON: And that a husband might live very happily with her?

CLEANTE: I have not the least doubt about it.

HARPAGON: There is one little difficulty; I am afraid she has not the fortune we
might reasonably expect.

CLEANTE: Oh, my father, riches are of little importance when one is sure of marrying
a virtuous woman.

HARPAGON: I beg your pardon. Only there is this to be said: that if we do not find as
much money as we could wish, we may make it up in something else.

CLEANTE: That follows as a matter of course.

HARPAGON: Well, I must say that I am very much pleased to find that you entirely agree
with me; I have made up my mind to marry her, provided I find she has some dowry.

CLEANTE: Eh!

HARPAGON: What now?

CLEANTE: You are resolved, you say...?

HARPAGON: To marry Marianne.

CLEANTE: Who? you? you?

9
HARPAGON: Yes, I, I, I. What does all this mean?

CLEANTE: I feel a sudden dizziness, and I must withdraw for a Little while.

HARPAGON: It will be nothing. Go drink a glass of cold water, it will set you all right again.

CLEANTE exits.

HARPAGON: As to your brother, I have thought for him of a certain widow, of whom I
heard this morning; and you I shall give to Mr. Anselme.

ELISE: To Mr. Anselme?

HARPAGON: Yes, a staid and prudent man, who is not above fifty, and of whose
riches everybody speaks.

ELISE: (_curtseying_). I have no wish to marry, father, if you please.

HARPAGON: (imitating). And I, my little girl, my darling, I wish you to marry, if you please.

ELISE: (_curtseying again_). I beg your pardon, my father.

HARPAGON: (imitating). I beg your pardon, my daughter.

ELISE: I am the very humble servant of Mr. Anselme, but (curtseying), with your leave,
I shall not marry him.

HARPAGON: I am your very humble servant, but (imitating) you will marry him this
very evening.

ELISE: This evening?

HARPAGON: This evening.

ELISE: (_curtseying again_). It cannot be done, father.

HARPAGON: (_imitating_ ELISE). It will be done, daughter.

ELISE: No.

HARPAGON: Yes.

ELISE: No, I tell you.

HARPAGON: Yes, I tell you.

10
ELISE: You will never force me to do such a thing

HARPAGON: I will force you to it.

ELISE: I had rather kill myself than marry such a man.

HARPAGON: You will not kill yourself, and you will marry him. But did you ever see such
impudence? Did ever any one hear a daughter speak in such a fashion to her father?

ELISE: But did ever anyone see a father marry his daughter after such a fashion?

HARPAGON: It is a match against which nothing can be said, and I am perfectly sure
that everybody will approve of my choice.

ELISE: And I know that it will be approved of by no reasonable person.

HARPAGON: There is Valere coming. Shall we make him judge in this affair?

ELISE: Willingly.

HARPAGON: You will abide by what he says?

ELISE: Yes, whatever he thinks right, I will do.

HARPAGON: Agreed.

11
SCENE VII.--VALERE, HARPAGON, ELISE.
HARPAGON: Valere, we have chosen you to decide who is in the right, my daughter or I.

VALERE: It is certainly you, Sir.

HARPAGON: But have you any idea of what we are talking about?

VALERE: No; but you could not be in the wrong; you are reason itself.

HARPAGON: I want to give her to-night, for a husband, a man as rich as he is good; and
the hussy tells me to my face that she scorns to take him. What do you say to that?

VALERE: What I say to it?

HARPAGON: Yes?

VALERE: Eh! eh!

HARPAGON: What?

VALERE: I say that I am, upon the whole, of your opinion, and that you cannot but be right;
yet, perhaps, she is not altogether wrong; and....

HARPAGON: How so? Mr. Anselme is an excellent match; he is a nobleman, and a

gentleman too; of simple habits, and extremely well richness. He has no children left from
his first marriage. Could she meet with anything more suitable?

VALERE: It is true. But she might say that you are going rather fast, and that she ought to
have at least a little time to consider whether her inclination could reconcile itself to....

HARPAGON: It is an opportunity I must not allow to slip through my fingers. I find an advantage
here which I should not find elsewhere, and he agrees to take her without dowry.

VALERE: Without dowry?

HARPAGON: Yes.

VALERE: Ah! I have nothing more to say. A more convincing reason could not be found;
and she must yield to that.

HARPAGON: It is a considerable saving to me.

VALERE: Undoubtedly; this admits of no contradiction. It is true that your daughter might
represent to you that marriage is a more serious affair than people are apt to believe; that
the happiness or misery of a whole life depends on it, and that an engagement which is to
last till death ought not to be entered into without great consideration.

12
HARPAGON: Without dowry!

VALERE: That must of course decide everything. There are certainly people who might tell
you that on such occasions the wishes of a daughter are no doubt to be considered, and
that this great disparity of age, of disposition, and of feelings might be the cause of many an
unpleasant thing in a married life.

HARPAGON: Without dowry!

VALERE: Ah! it must be granted that there is no reply to that; who in the world could think
otherwise? I do not mean to say but that there are many fathers who would set a much
higher value on the happiness of their daughter than on the money they may have to give
for their marriage; who would not like to sacrifice them to their own interests, and who
would, above all things, try to see in a marriage that sweet conformity of tastes which is a
sure pledge of honour, tranquillity and joy; and that....

HARPAGON: Without dowry!

VALERE: That is true; nothing more can be said. Without dowry. How can anyone resist
such arguments?

HARPAGON: Ah! I fancy I hear a dog barking. Is anyone after my money. Stop here,
I'll come back directly.

13
SCENE VIII.--ELISE, VALERE.
ELISE: Surely, Valere, you are not in earnest when you speak to him in that manner?

VALERE: I do it that I may not vex him, and the better to secure my ends. To resist
him boldly would simply spoil everything.

ELISE: But this marriage, Valere?

VALERE: We will find some pretext for breaking it.

ELISE: But what pretext can we find if it is to be concluded to-night?

VALERE: You must ask to have it delayed, and must feign some illness or other.

ELISE: But he will soon discover the truth if they call in the doctor.

VALERE: Not a bit of it. Do you imagine that a doctor understands what he is about?
Nonsense! Don't be afraid. Believe me, you may complain of any disease you please,
the doctor will be at no loss to explain to you from what it proceeds.

14
SCENE IX--HARPAGON, ELISE, VALERE.
HARPAGON enters.

VALERE: In short, if your love, dear Elise, is as strong as.... (Seeing HARPAGON) Yes, a
daughter is bound to obey her father. She has no right to inquire what a husband offered
to her is like, and when the most important question, "without dowry," presents itself, she
should accept anybody that is given her.

HARPAGON: Good; that was beautifully said!

VALERE: I beg your pardon, Sir, if I carry it a little too far, and take upon myself to speak
to her as I do.

HARPAGON: Why, I am delighted, and I wish you to have her entirely under your control.
(To ELISE) Yes, you may run away as much as you like. I give him all the authority over you
that heaven has given me, and I will have you do all that he tells you.

VALERE: After that, resist all my expostulations, if you can.

ELISE exits.

VALERE: I will follow her, Sir, if you will allow me, and will continue the lecture I was
giving her.

HARPAGON: Yes, do so; you will oblige me greatly.I am going to take a short stroll in
the town, and I will come back again presently.

VALERE: (ironically). Yes, money is more precious than anything else in the world, and
you should thank heaven that you have so worthy a man for a father.

HARPAGON: Ah! the honest fellow! he speaks like an Oracle. Happy is he who can
secure such a servant!

15
ACT II.

SCENE I.--CLEANTE, LA FLECHE.

CLEANTE: Things are worse than ever for us, and since I left you, I have discovered that
my own father is my love rival.

LA FLECHE: Your father in love?

CLEANTE: It seems so; and I found it very difficult to hide from him what I felt at such
a discovery.

LA FLECHE: He meddling with love! What the deuce is he thinking of? is love made
for people of his build?

CLEANTE: It is to punish me for my sins that this passion has entered his head.

LA FLECHE: But why do you hide your love from him?

CLEANTE: To make it more easy for me to fall back, if need be, upon some device to
prevent this marriage. What answer did you receive? Am i going to get the money?

LA FLECHE: Indeed, Sir, those who borrow are much to be pitied, and we must put up
with strange things when, like you, we are forced to pass through the hands of the usurers.

CLEANTE: Shall I have the fifteen thousand francs which I want?

LA FLECHE: Yes, but under certain trifling conditions, which you must accept if you wish
the bargain to be concluded.

“The lender has not in hand the sum required, and as, in order to oblige the borrower, he
is himself obliged to borrow from another at the rate of twenty per cent., it is but right that
the said first borrower shall pay this interest, without detriment to the rest; since it is only to
oblige him that the said lender is himself forced to borrow."

CLEANTE: The deuce! What a Jew! That is more than twenty-five per cent.

LA FLECHE: That's true; and it is the remark I made. It is for you to consider the
matter before you act.

CLEANTE: How can I consider? I want the money, and I must therefore accept everything.

LA FLECHE: That is exactly what I answered.

CLEANTE: Is there anything else?

16
LA FLECHE: Only a small item.

"Of the fifteen thousand francs which are demanded, the lender Will only be able to count
down twelve thousand in hard cash; instead of the remaining three thousand, the borrower
will have to take the chattels, clothing, and jewels, contained in the following catalogue,
and which the said lender has put in all good faith at the lowest possible figure."

CLEANTE: Stop right there, i do not want to hear any other word! Did ever anyone hear of
such usury? Is he not satisfied with the outrageous interest he asks that he must force me
to take, instead of the three thousand francs, all the old rubbish which he picks up. What
would you have me do? I need the money. Give me that memorandum that I may have
another look at it.

17
SCENE II.--HARPAGON, MR. SIMON (CLEANTE andLA FLECHE at the back).
MR SIMON: Yes, Sir; it is a young man who is greatly in want of money; his affairs force
him to find some at any cost, and he will submit to all your conditions.

LA FLECHE: (recognising MR. SIMON). What does this mean? Mr. Simon talking with
your father!

CLEANTE: Has he been told who I am, and would you be capable of betraying me?

MR SIMON: (to CLEANTE and LA FLECHE). Ah! you are in Good time! But who told you
to come here? (To HARPAGON) It was certainly not I who told them your name and
address; but I am of opinion that there is no great harm done; they are people who can be
trusted, and you can come to some understanding together.

HARPAGON: What!

MR SIMON: This is the gentleman who wants to borrow the fifteen thousand francs.

HARPAGON: What! miscreant! is it you who abandon yourself to such excesses?

CLEANTE: What! father! is it you who stoop to such shameful deeds?

(MR. SIMON runs away, and LA FLECHE hides)

HARPAGON: It is you who are ruining yourself by loans so greatly to be condemned!

CLEANTE: So it is you who seek to enrich yourself by such criminal usury!

HARPAGON: Get out of my sight, you reprobate; get out of my sight!

CLEANTE: Who is the more criminal in your opinion: he who buys the money of which
he stands in need, or he who obtains, by unfair means, money for which he has no use?

CLEANTE exits.

HARPAGON: Begone, I say, and do not provoke me to anger.

FROSINE enters.

SCENE IV.--FROSINE 1 and 2, HARPAGON.

FROSINE: Sir.

HARPAGON: Wait a moment, I will come back and speak to you.

SCENE V.--LA FLECHE, FROSINE 1 and 2.

18
LA FLECHE: (without seeing FROSINE). The adventure is most comical. Hidden
somewhere he must have a large store of goods of all kinds, for the list did not contain
one single article which either of us recognised.

FROSINE 1: Hallo! is it you, my poor La Fleche? How is it we meet here?

LA FLECHE: Ah! ah! it is you, Frosine; and what have you come to do here?

FROSINE 1: What we do everywhere else…

FROSINE 2: Busy ourselves about other people's affairs, make ourselves useful to
the community in general, and profit as much as we possibly can by the small talent
we possess.

FROSINE 1: Must we not live by our wits in this world? and what other resources
have people like us but intrigue and cunning?

LA FLECHE: Have you, then, any business with the master of this house?

FROSINE 1: Yes. we are transacting for him a certain small matter for which he is pretty
sure to give me a reward.

LA FLECHE: He give you a reward! Ah! ah! Upon my word, you will be 'cute if you ever
get one, and I warn you that ready money is very scarce hereabouts.

FROSINE 2: That may be, but there are certain services which wonderfully touch
our feelings.

LA FLECHE: You don't know Harpagon. He is the human being of all human beings the
least humane, the mortal of all mortals the hardest and closest. There is no Service great
enough to induce him to open his purse. There is nothing more dry, more baren, than his
favour and his good grace, and "_give_" is a word for which be has such a strong dislike that
he never says _I give_, but _I lend, you a good morning_.

FROSINE 2: That's all very well; but I know the art of fleecing men.

FROSINE 1: I have a secret of touching their affections by flattering their hearts, and
of finding out their weak points.

LA FLECHE: All useless here. I defy you to soften, as far as money is concerned, the man
we are speaking of. In short, he loves money better than reputation, honour, and virtue,
and the mere sight of anyone making demands upon his purse sends him into convulsions;
And if ... Here he comes again; I leave you.

19
SCENE VI.--HARPAGON, FROSINE.
HARPAGON: Well, what is it, Frosine?

FROSINE 1: Bless me, how well you look! You are the very picture of health.

HARPAGON: Who? I?

FROSINE 2: Never have I seen you looking more rosy, more hearty.

HARPAGON: Are you in earnest?

FROSINE 1: Why! you have never been so young in your life; and I know many a man
of twenty-five who looks much older than you do.

HARPAGON: And yet, Frosine, I have passed threescore.

FROSINE 2: Threescore! Well, and what then? You don't mean to make a trouble of that,
do you? It's the very flower of manhood, the threshold of the prime of life.

HARPAGON: True; but twenty years less would do me no harm, I think.

FROSINE 1: Nonsense! You've no need of that, and you are of a build to last out a hundred.

HARPAGON: Do you really think so?

FROSINE 2: Decidedly. You have all the appearance of it.Show me your hand.

HARPAGON: You know all about that, do you?

FROSINE 2: I should think I do. Dear me, what a line of life there is there!

HARPAGON: Where?

FROSINE 1: Don't you see how far this line goes?

HARPAGON: Well, and what does it mean?

FROSINE 2: There ... I said a hundred years;

FROSINE 1: But no, it is one hundred and twenty I ought to have said.

HARPAGON: Is it possible?

FROSINE 2: I tell you they will have to kill you, and you will bury your children and
your children's children.

20
HARPAGON: So much the better! And what news of our affair?

FROSINE 2: Is there any need to ask? Did ever anyone see us begin anything and not
succeed in it? We have, especially for matchmaking, the most wonderful talent. There are
no two persons in the world we could not couple together.

FROSINE 1: As we know the ladies very well, we told them every particular about you;

FROSINE 2: And we acquainted the mother with your intentions towards Marianne since
you saw her pass in the street and enjoy the fresh air out of her window.

HARPAGON: What did she answer...?

FROSINE 1: She received your proposal with great joy;

HARPAGON: You see, Frosine, I am obliged to give some supper to Mr. Anselme, and
I should like her to have a share in the feast.

FROSINE 1: You are quite right. She is to come after dinner to pay a visit to your daughter;

HARPAGON: That will do very well;

HARPAGON: But I say, Frosine, have you spoken to the mother about the dowry she can
give her daughter? Did you make her understand that under such circumstances she
ought to do her utmost and to make a great sacrifice? For, after all, one does not marry a
girl without her bringing something with her.

FROSINE 2: How something! She is a girl who will bring you a clear twelve thousand
francs a year?

HARPAGON: Twelve thousand francs a year?

FROSINE 2: Yes! She is a girl accustomed to live upon salad, milk, cheese, and apples,
and who consequently will require neither a well served up table, nor any rich broth, nor
your everlasting peeled barley; none, in short, of all those delicacies that another woman
would want. This is no small matter, and may well amount to three thousand francs yearly.

FROSINE 1: Besides this, she only cares for simplicity and neatness; she will have none
of those splendid dresses and rich jewels, none of that sumptuous furniture in which girls
like her indulge so extravagantly; and this item is worth more than four thousand francs per
annum.

FROSINE 2: Lastly, she has the deepest aversion to gambling; and this is not very
common nowadays among women.Five thousand francs a year at play and four thousand
in clothes and jewels make nine thousand; and three thousand francs which we count for
food, does it not make your twelve thousand francs?

HARPAGON: Yes, that's not bad; but, after all, that calculation has nothing real in it.

21
FROSINE 1: Excuse me; is it nothing real to bring you in marriage a great sobriety, to inherit a
great love for simplicity in dress, and the acquired property of a great hatred for gambling?

HARPAGON: It is a farce to pretend to make up a dowry with all the expenses she will
not run into. I could not give a receipt for what I do not receive; and I must decidedly get
something.

FROSINE 2: Bless me! you will get enough; and they have spoken to me of a certain
country where they have some property, of which you will be master.

HARPAGON: We shall have to see to that.

HARPAGON: I have nothing the matter to speak of, I am thankful to say. It is only my
cough, which returns from time to time.

FROSINE 1: That is nothing, and coughing becomes you exceedingly well.

HARPAGON: Tell me, Frosine, has Marianne seen me yet? Has she not noticed me when
I passed by?

FROSINE 1: No; but we have had many conversations about you.

FROSINE 2: We gave her an exact description of your person, and we did not fail to
make the most of your merit, and to show her what an advantage it would be to have a
husband like you.

HARPAGON: You did right, and I thank you very much for it.

FROSINE 1: I have, Sir, a small request to make to you. I am in danger of losing a lawsuit
for want of a little money (HARPAGON looks grave), and you can easily help me with it, if
you have pity upon me.

FROSINE 2: You cannot imagine how happy she will be to see you. (HARPAGON joyful)
Oh! how sure you are to please her, and how sure that antique ruff of yours is to produce a
wonderful effect on her mind.

HARPAGON: You send me into raptures, Frosine, by saying that.

FROSINE 1: I tell you the truth, Sir; this lawsuit is of the utmost importance for me.
(HARPAGON serious.) If I lose it, I am for ever ruined; but a very small sum will save me.

FROSINE 2: I should like you to have seen the happiness she felt when I spoke of you
to her. (HARPAGON pleased.)

HARPAGON: You have given me great pleasure, Frosine, and I assure you I....

FROSINE 1: I beg of you, Sir, to grant me the little assistance I ask of you. (HARPAGON
looks grave.) It will put me on my feet again, and I shall feel grateful to you for ever.

22
HARPAGON: Good-bye; I must go and finish my correspondence.

FROSINE 1: I assure you, Sir, that you could not help me in a more pressing necessity.

HARPAGON: I will see that my carriage is ready to take you to the fair.

FROSINE 1: I would not importune you so if I were not compelled by necessity.

HARPAGON: And I will see that we have supper early, so that nobody may be ill.

FROSINE 2: Do not refuse me the service; I beg of you. You can hardly believe, Sir, the
pleasure that....

HARPAGON: I must go; somebody is calling me. We shall see each other again by and by.

FROSINE 1: (alone). May the fever seize you, you stingy cur, and send you to the devil and
his angels! I must not drop the negotiation; for I have the other side, and there, at all
events, I am sure of a good reward.

23
ACT III.

SCENE II.--HARPAGON, CLEANTE, ELISE, VALERE, MASTER

JACQUES, BRINDAVOINE, LA MERLUCHE.
HARPAGON: Here, come, all of you; Brindavoine, La Merluche, to you belongs the duty
of washing the glasses, and of giving to drink, but only when people are thirsty. Wait until
you have been asked several times.

LA MERLUCHE: Shall we take off our smocks, Sir?

HARPAGON: Be very careful not to spoil your clothes.

BRINDAVOINE: You know, Sir, that one of the fronts of my doublet is covered with a
large stain of oil from the lamp.

LA MERLUCHE: And I, Sir, that my breeches are all torn behind, and that, saving your
presence....

HARPAGON: (to LA MERLUCHE). Peace! Turn carefully towards the wall, and always
face the company. (To BRINDAVOINE, showing him how to hide the stain) And you,
always hold your hat in this fashion when you wait on the guests.

HARPAGON: As for you, my daughter, you will see that nothing is wasted. Meanwhile get
ready to welcome my lady-love, who is coming this afternoon, and will take you off to the
fair with her.

ELISE: Yes, father.

HARPAGON: And you, my young dandy of a son to whom I have the kindness of forgiving
what happened this morning, mind you don't receive her coldly, or show her a sour face.

CLEANTE: I cannot promise you that I am very happy to see her become my stepmother;
but as to receiving her properly, and as to giving her a kind welcome, I promise to obey
you in that to the very letter.

HARPAGON: Be careful you do, at least.

CLEANTE: You will see that you have no cause to complain.

HARPAGON: Valere, you will have to give me your help in this business. Now,
Master Jacques, I kept you for the last.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Is it to your coachman, Sir, or to your cook you want to speak, for I
am both the one and the other?

HARPAGON: To both.

24
MASTER JACQUES 2: But to which of the two first?

HARPAGON: To the cook.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Then wait a minute, if you please.

(JACQUES _takes off his stable-coat and appears dressed as a cook_.)

MASTER JACQUES 2: Now I am at your service.

HARPAGON: I have engaged myself, Master Jacques, to give a supper to-night.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (_aside_). Wonderful!

HARPAGON: Tell me, can you give us a good supper?

MASTER JACQUES 2: Yes, if you give me plenty of money.

HARPAGON: Ah! I think they have nothing else to say except money, money, money!

VALERE: A clever man should talk of a good supper with little money.

MASTER JACQUES 1: A good supper with little money?

VALERE: Yes.

MASTER JACQUES 2: (_to_ VALERE). Indeed, Mr. Steward, you will oblige me greatly
by telling me your secret, and also, if you like, by filling my place as cook; for you keep
on meddling here, and want to be everything.

HARPAGON: Hold your tongue. What shall we want?

MASTER JACQUES 1: Ask Mr. Steward, who will give you good cheer with Little money.

HARPAGON: Do you hear? I am speaking to you, and expect you to answer me.

MASTER JACQUES 2: How many will there be at your table?

HARPAGON: Eight or ten; but you must only reckon for eight. When there is enough
for eight, there is enough for ten.

VALERE: That is evident.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Very well, then; you must have four tureens of soup and five side
dishes; soups, entrees....

25
HARPAGON: What! do you mean to feed a whole town?

VALERE: (to JACQUES). Has your master invited people in order to destroy them with
over-feeding? Go and read a little the precepts of health, and ask the doctors if there is
anything so hurtful to man as excess in eating.

HARPAGON: He is perfectly right.

VALERE: Know, Master Jacques, according to the saying of one of the ancients, "We
must eat to live, and not live to eat."

HARPAGON: (to JACQUES) Do you hear that? Remember to write down those words
for me. I will have them engraved in letters over the mantel-piece of my dining-room.

VALERE: I will not fail.

HARPAGON: Do so.

MASTER JACQUES 2: So much the better; all the less work for me.

HARPAGON: Now, Master Jacques, you must clean my carriage.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Wait; this is to the coachman. (JACQUES puts on his coat.) You say....

HARPAGON: That you must clean my carriage, have my horses ready to drive to the fair.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Your horses! Sir, they are not at all in a condition to stir.

HARPAGON: It won't be very hard work to go to the fair.

MASTER JACQUES 1: No, Sir. I haven't the heart to drive them; it would go against my
conscience to use the whip to them in the state they are in. They have not even
strength enough to drag themselves along.

VALERE: Sir, I will ask our neighbour, Picard, to drive them.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Be it so. I had much rather they should die under another's hand
than under mine.

VALERE: Master Jacques is mightily considerate.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Mr. Steward is mightily indispensable.

HARPAGON: Peace.

26
SCENE VII.--MARIANNE, FROSINE, MASTER JACQUES.
FROSINE 2: Do you know if your master is at home?

MASTER JACQUES 1: Yes, he is indeed; I know it but too well.

FROSINE 1: Tell him, please, that we are here.

MARIANNE: Ah! Frosine, how strange I feel, and how I dread this interview!

FROSINE 2: Why should you? What can you possibly dread?

MARIANNE: Alas! can you ask me? Can you not understand the alarms of a person about
to see the instrument of torture to which she is to be tied.

FROSINE 1: I see very well that to die agreeably, Harpagon is not the torture you would
embrace; and I can judge by your looks that the fair young man you spoke of to me is still
in your thoughts.

MARIANNE: Yes, Frosine; The respectful visits he has paid at our house have left, I
confess, a great impression on my heart.

FROSINE 1: But do you know who he is?

MARIANNE: No, I do not. All I know is that he is made to be loved; that if things were left to
my choice, I would much rather marry him than any other, and that he adds not a little to
the horrible dread that I have of the husband they want to force upon me.

FROSINE 2: Oh yes! All those dandies are very pleasant, and can talk agreeably enough,
but most of them are as poor as church mice; and it is much better for you to marry an old
husband, who gives you plenty of money. I fully acknowledge that the senses somewhat
clash with the end I propose, and that there are certain little inconveniences to be
endured with such a husband

FROSINE 1: But all that won't last; and his death, believe me, will soon put you in a position
to take a more pleasant husband, who will make amends for all.

MARIANNE: Oh, Frosine! What a strange state of things that, in order to be happy, we
must look forward to the death of another.

FROSINE 2: You are joking. You marry him with the express understanding that he will
soon leave you a widow; it must be one of the articles of the marriage contract.

FROSINE 1: It would be very wrong in him not to die before three months are over. Here
he is himself.

MARIANNE: Ah! dear Frosine, what a face!

27
SCENE IX.--HARPAGON, MARIANNE, FROSINE.
HARPAGON: (to MARIANNE). Do not be offended, fair one, if I come to you with my
glasses on. I know that your beauty is great enough to be seen with the naked eye; but, still,
it is with glasses that we look at the stars, and I maintain and uphold that you are a star, the
most beautiful and in the land of stars. Frosine, she does not answer, star, it seems to me,
shows no joy at the sight of me.

FROSINE: It is because she is still quite awe-struck, and young girls are always shy at
first, and afraid of showing what they feel.

HARPAGON: (to FROSINE). You are right. (To MARIANNE) My pretty darling, there is
my daughter coming to welcome you.

ELISE enters.

MARIANNE: I am very late in acquitting myself of the visit I owed you.

ELISE: You’ ve done what I ought to’ve done. It was for me to have come and seen you first.

HARPAGON: You see what a great girl she is; but ill weeds grow apace.

MARIANNE: (_aside to_ FROSINE). Oh, what an unpleasant man!

HARPAGON: (_to_ FROSINE). What does my fair one say?

FROSINE: That she thinks you perfect.

HARPAGON: You do me too much honour, my adorable darling.

MARIANNE: (_aside_). What a dreadful creature!

HARPAGON: I really feel too grateful to you for these sentiments.

MARIANNE: (_aside_). I can bear it no longer.

CLEANTE enters.

HARPAGON: Here is my son, who also comes to pay his respects to you.

MARIANNE: (_aside to_ FROSINE). Oh, Frosine! He is the very one of whom I spoke to
you!

FROSINE: (_to_ MARIANNE). Well, that is extraordinary.

HARPAGON: You are surprised to see that my children can be so old; but I shall soon get
rid of both of them.

28
CLEANTE: Madam, to tell you the truth, I little expected such an event; and my father
surprised me not a little when he told me to-day of the decision he had come to.

MARIANNE: I can say the same thing. It is an unexpected meeting.

CLEANTE: Madam, my father cannot make a better choice, and it is a great joy to me to
have the honour of welcoming you here. But this marriage is repugnant to me. With my
father's permission I hope you will allow me to say that, if things depended on me, it
would never take place.

MARIANNE: I must tell you that things are much the same with me, if you have any
repugnance in seeing me your stepmother, I shall have no less in seeing you my stepson. I
should be grieved to cause you sorrow, and unless I am forced to it, I will never consent to
a marriage which is so painful to you.

HARPAGON: Well, a foolish speech deserves a foolish answer. I beg your pardon, my love,
for the impertinence of my son. He is a silly young fellow, who has not yet learnt the value
of his own words.

MARIANNE: I assure you that he has not at all offended me.

HARPAGON: It is kind of you to excuse him thus. You will see that his feelings will change.

CLEANTE: No, they will never change; and I earnestly beg of you, Madam, to believe me.

HARPAGON: Did ever anybody see such folly? He is becoming worse and worse.

CLEANTE: Would you have me false to my inmost feelings?

HARPAGON: Again! Change your manners, if you please.

CLEANTE: Since you wish me to speak differently… Forgive me if I tell you that I never saw
in the world anybody more charming than you are; that I can understand no happiness to
equal that of pleasing you, and that to be your husband is a glory, a felicity, I should prefer
to the destinies of the greatest princes upon earth. There is nothing I would not do for so
precious a conquest, and the most powerful obstacles....

HARPAGON: Gently, gently, my son, if you please.

CLEANTE: These are complimentary words which I speak to her in your name.

HARPAGON: Bless me! I have a tongue of my own to explain my feelings.

FROSINE 1: I think it is better for us to go at once to the fair.

HARPAGON: (to BRINDAVOINE). Have the carriage ready at once.

29
SCENE XII.--HARPAGON, MARIANNE, ELISE, CLEANTE, VALERE, FROSINE.
HARPAGON: (to .MARIANNE). I hope you will excuse me, my dear, but I forgot to
order some refreshments for you, before you went out.

CLEANTE: I have thought of it, father, and have ordered to be brought in here some
baskets of China oranges, sweet citrons, and preserves, which I sent for in your name.

HARPAGON: (_aside, to_ VALERE). Valere!

VALERE: (_aside, to_ HARPAGON). He has lost his senses!

CLEANTE: You are afraid, father, that it will not be enough? I hope, Madam, that you
will have the kindness to excuse it.

MARIANNE: It was by no means necessary.

CLEANTE: Did you ever see, Madam, a more brilliant diamond than the one my father
has upon his finger?

MARIANNE: It certainly sparkles very much.

CLEANTE: (_taking the diamond off his father's finger_). You must see it near.

MARIANNE: It is a beautiful one; it possesses great lustre.

CLEANTE: . No, Madam, it is in hands too beautiful; it is a present my father gives you.

HARPAGON: I?

CLEANTE: Is it not true, father, that you wish her to keep it for your sake?

HARPAGON: (_aside, to his son_). What?

CLEANTE: (to MARIANNE). A strange question indeed! He is making me signs that I am

to force you to accept it.

MARIANNE: I would not....

CLEANTE: (_to_ MARIANNE). I beg of you.... He would not take it back.

MARIANNE: It would be....

CLEANTE: (still hindering MARIANNE from returning it). No; I tell you, you will offend him.

MARIANNE: Pray....

30
CLEANTE: By no mean. He is perfectly shocked at your refusal.

HARPAGON: (_aside, to his son_). Ah! traitor!

CLEANTE: (_to_ MARIANNE). You see he is in despair.

HARPAGON: (_aside, to his son, threatening him_). You villain!

CLEANTE: It is not my fault. I do all I can to persuade her to accept it; but she is obstinate.

HARPAGON: (_in a rage, aside to his son_). Rascal!

CLEANTE: You are the cause, Madam, of my father scolding me.

HARPAGON: (_aside, with the same looks_). Scoundrel!

CLEANTE: (_to_ MARIANNE). You will make him ill; for goodness' sake, hesitate no longer.

FROSINE: Why so much ceremony? Keep the ring, since the gentleman wishes you to.

MARIANNE: I will keep it now, Sir, in order not to make you angry, and I shall take
another opportunity of returning it to you.

BRINDAVOINE enters.

BRINDAVOINE: Sir, there is a gentleman here who wants to speak to you.

HARPAGON: Tell him that I am engaged, and that I cannot see him to-day.

BRINDAVOINE: He says he has some money for you.

HARPAGON: (_to_ MARIANNE). Pray, excuse me; I will come back directly.

CLEANTE: Father, I will do the honours of the house for you, and take this lady into
the garden, where lunch will be brought.

HARPAGON: Valere, look after all this; and take care, I beseech you, to save as much of
it as you can, so that we may send it back to the tradesman again.

VALERE: I will.

31
ACT IV.

SCENE I.--CLEANTE, MARIANNE, ELISE, FROSINE.

CLEANTE: Let us come in here; we shall be much better. There is no one about us that
we need be afraid of, and we can speak openly.

ELISE: Yes, Madam, my brother has told me of the love he has for you. I know what
sorrow and anxiety such trials as these may cause, and I assure you that I have the
greatest sympathy for you.

MARIANNE: I feel it a great comfort in my trouble to have the sympathy of a person like
you, and I entreat you, Madam, ever to retain for me a friendship so capable of softening
the cruelty of my fate.

FROSINE 1: You really are both very unfortunate not to have told us of all this before.
We might certainly have warded off the blow, and not have carried things so far.

CLEANTE: What could I do? It is my evil destiny which has willed it so. But you,
fair Marianne, what have you resolved to do? What resolution have you taken?

MARIANNE: Alas! Is it in my power to take any resolution? And, dependent as I am, can I
do anything else except form wishes?

CLEANTE: No other support for me in your heart? Nothing but mere wishes? No
pitying energy? No kindly relief? No active affection?

MARIANNE: What am I to say to you? Put yourself in my place, and judge what I can
possibly do. Advise me, dispose of me, I trust myself entirely to you, for I am sure that
you will never ask of me anything but what is modest and seemly.

CLEANTE: Alas! to what do you reduce me when you wish me to be guided entirely
by feelings of strict duty and of scrupulous propriety.

MARIANNE: But what would you have me do? Even if I were, for you, to divest myself of
the many scruples which our sex imposes on us, I have too much regard for my mother, for
me to give her any cause of sorrow. Do all you can with her. I give you leave to say and do
all you wish; and if anything depends upon her knowing the true state of my feelings, by all
means tell her what they are.

CLEANTE: Frosine, dear Frosine, will you not help us?

FROSINE 2: Indeed, we should like to do so, as you know. We am not naturally unkind.

FROSINE 1: Heaven has not given us a heart of flint, and we feel but too ready to help
when we see young people loving each other in all earnestness and honesty.

FROSINE 2: What can we do in this case?

32
CLEANTE: Try and think a little.

MARIANNE: Advise us.

ELISE: Invent something to undo what you have done.

FROSINE 2: Rather a difficult piece of business. (To MARIANNE) As far as your mother is
concerned, she is not altogether unreasonable and we might succeed in making her give
to the son the gift she reserved for the father.

FROSINE 1: (To CLEANTE) But the most disheartening part of it all is that your father is
your father.

CLEANTE: Yes, so it is.

FROSINE 1: I mean that he will bear malice if he sees that he is refused, and he will be in
no way disposed afterwards to give his consent to your marriage.

FROSINE 2: It would be well if the refusal could be made to come from him, and you
ought to try by some means or other to make him dislike you, Marianne.

CLEANTE: You are quite right.

FROSINE 2: Yes, right enough, no doubt. That is what ought to be done; but how in
the world are we to set about it?

FROSINE 1: Wait a moment. Suppose we had a somewhat elderly woman with a Little of
the ability which I possess, and able sufficiently well to represent a lady of rank, by means of
a retinue made up in haste, and of some whimsical title of a marchioness or viscountess,
whom we would suppose to come from Lower Brittany.

FROSINE 2: We should have enough power over your father to persuade him that she is
a rich woman, in possession, besides her houses, of a hundred thousand crowns in ready
money; that she is deeply in love with him, and that she would marry him at any cost, were
she even to give him all her money by the marriage contract.

FROSINE 1: I have no doubt he would listen to the proposal. For certainly he loves you very
much, my dear, but he loves money still better. When once he has consented to your
marriage, it does not signify much how he finds out the true state of affairs about our
marchioness.

CLEANTE: All that is very well made up.

FROSINE 2: Leave it to us.

CLEANTE: Depend on my gratitude, Frosine, if you succeed. But, dear Marianne, let us
begin, I beg of you, by gaining over your mother; it would be a great deal accomplished
if this marriage were once broken.

MARIANNE: I will do all I can, and will forget nothing.

33
SCENE II.--HARPAGON, MARIANNE, ELISE, FROSINE.
HARPAGON: (aside, and without being seen). Ah! ah! my son is kissing the hand of his
intended stepmother, and his intended stepmother does not seem much averse to it!
Can there be any mystery in all this?

ELISE: Here comes my father.

HARPAGON: The carriage is quite ready, and you can start when you like.

CLEANTE: Since you are not going, father, allow me to take care of them.

HARPAGON: No, stop here; they can easily take care of themselves, and I want you.

MARIANNE and ELISE exits.

SCENE III.--HARPAGON, CLEANTE.

HARPAGON: Well, now, all consideration of stepmother aside, tell me what do you think
of this lady?

CLEANTE: What I think of her?

HARPAGON: Yes, what do you think of her appearance, her figure, her beauty
and intelligence?

CLEANTE: So, so.

HARPAGON: But still?

CLEANTE: To tell you the truth, I did not find her such as I expected. Her manner is that of
a thorough coquette, her figure is rather awkward, her beauty very middling, and her
intelligence of the meanest order. Do not suppose that I say this to make you dislike her; for
if I must have a stepmother, I like the idea of this one as well as of any other.

HARPAGON: You spoke to her just now, nevertheless....

CLEANTE: I paid her several compliments in your name, but it was to please you.

HARPAGON: So then you don't care for her?

CLEANTE: Who? I? Not in the least.

HARPAGON: I am sorry for it, for that puts an end to a scheme which had occurred to me.
Since I have seen her here, I have been thinking of my own age; and I feel that people
would find fault with me for marrying so young a girl. This consideration had made me
determine to abandon the project, and as I had demanded her in marriage, and had given
her my promise, I would have given her to you if it were not for the dislike you have for her.

34
CLEANTE: To me?

HARPAGON: To you.

CLEANTE: In marriage?

HARPAGON: In marriage.

CLEANTE: It is true she is not at all to my taste; but, to please you, father, I will bring
myself to marry her, if you please.

HARPAGON: If I please! I am more reasonable than you think. I don't wish to compel you.

CLEANTE: Excuse me! I will make an attempt to love her.

HARPAGON: No, no; a marriage cannot be happy where there is no love.

CLEANTE: That, my father, will, perhaps, come by and by, and it is said that love is often
the fruit of marriage.

HARPAGON: No, it is not right to risk it on the side of the man, and there are some
troublesome things I don't care to run the chance of. If you had felt any inclination for her,
you should have married her instead of me, but as it is, I will return to my first intention
and marry her myself.

CLEANTE: Well, father, since things are so, I had better be frank with you, and reveal our
secret to you. The truth is that I have loved her ever since I saw her one day on the
promenade. I intended to ask you today to let me marry her, and I was only deterred from
it because you spoke of marrying her, and because I feared to displease you.

HARPAGON: Have you ever paid her any visits?

CLEANTE: Yes, father.

HARPAGON: Many?

CLEANTE: Yes; considering how long we have been acquainted.

HARPAGON: You were well received.

CLEANTE: Very well, but without her knowing who I was; and that is why Marianne was
so surprised when she saw me today.

HARPAGON: Have you told her of your love, and of your intention of marrying her?

CLEANTE: Certainly, and I also spoke a little to the mother on the subject.

35
HARPAGON: Did she kindly receive your proposal for her daughter?

CLEANTE: Yes, very kindly.

HARPAGON: And does the daughter return your love?

CLEANTE: If I can believe appearances, she is certainly well disposed towards me.

HARPAGON: Now, look here, my son, I tell you what. You will have, if you please, to get
rid of your love for Marianne, to cease to pay your attentions to a person I intend for
myself, and to marry very soon the wife I have chosen for you.

CLEANTE: So, father, it is thus you deceive me! Very well, since things are come to such
a pass, I openly declare to you that I shall not give up my love for Marianne.

HARPAGON: What, rascal! You dare to trespass on my grounds?

CLEANTE: It is you who trespass on mine. I was the first.

HARPAGON: Am I not your father, and do you not owe me respect?

CLEANTE: There are things in which children are not called upon to pay deference to
their fathers; and love is no respector of persons.

HARPAGON: My stick will make you know me better.

CLEANTE: All your threatenings are nothing to me.

HARPAGON: You will give up Marianne?

CLEANTE: Never!

HARPAGON: Bring me my stick. Quick, I say! my stick!

36
SCENE IV.--HARPAGON, CLEANTE, MASTER JACQUES.
MASTER JACQUES 2: Hold! hold! Gentlemen, what does this mean? What are you
thinking of?

CLEANTE: I don't care a bit for it.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (_to_ CLEANTE). Ah! Sir, gently.

HARPAGON: He dares to speak to me with such impudence as that!

MASTER JACQUES 2: (_to_ HARPAGON). Ah! Sir, I beg of you.

CLEANTE: I shall keep to it.

MASTER JAQUES 1 (_to_ CLEANTE): What! to your father?

HARPAGON: Let me do it.

MASTER JACQUES 2: (_to_ HARPAGON). What! to your son? To me it's different.

HARPAGON: I will make you judge between us, so that you may see that I have right on
my side.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Willingly. (_To_ CLEANTE) Go a little farther back.

HARPAGON: There is a young girl I love and want to marry, and the scoundrel has
the impudence to love her also, and wants to marry her in spite of me.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Oh! he is wrong.

HARPAGON: Is it not an abominable thing to see a son who does not shrink from becoming the
rival of his father? And is it not his bounden duty to refrain from interfering with my love?

MASTER JACQUES 1: You are quite right; stop here, and let me go and speak to him.

CLEANTE: (to MASTER JACQUES). If he wants to make you a judge between us, I have
no objection.

MASTER JACQUES 2: You do me great honour.

CLEANTE: I am in love with a young girl who returns my affection, and who receives kindly
the offer of my heart; but my father takes it into his head to disturb our love by asking her
in marriage.

MASTER JACQUES 1: He certainly is wrong.

37
CLEANTE: Is it not shameful for a man of his age to think of marrying? I ask you if it is
right for him to fall in love? and ought he not now to leave that to younger men?

MASTER JACQUES 2: You are quite right; he is not serious; let me speak a word or two to
him. (To HARPAGON) Really, your son is amenable to reason. He says that he is
conscious of the respect he owes you, and that he only got angry in the heat of the
moment. He will willingly submit to all you wish if you will only promise to treat him more
kindly than you do, and will give him in marriage a person to his taste.

HARPAGON: Ah! tell him, Master Jacques, that he will obtain everything from me on
those terms, and that, except Marianne, I leave him free to choose for his wife
whomsoever he pleases.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Leave that to me. (To CLEANTE) Really, your father is not so
unreasonable as you make him out to me; and he tells me that it is your violence which irritated
him. He is quite ready to grant you all you want, provided you will use gentle means and will
give him the deference, respect, and submission that a son owes to his father.

CLEANTE: Ah! Master Jacques, you can assure him that if he grants me Marianne, he
will always find me the most submissive of men, and that I shall never do anything
contrary to his pleasure.

MASTER JACQUES 2: (to HARPAGON). It's all right; he consents to what you say.

HARPAGON: Nothing could be better.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (to CLEANTE). It's all settled; he is satisfied with your promises.

CLEANTE: Heaven be praised!

MASTER JACQUES 2: Gentlemen, you have nothing to do but to talk quietly over the
matter together;

38
SCENE V.--HARPAGON, CLEANTE.
CLEANTE: I beg your pardon, father, for having been angry.

HARPAGON: It is nothing.

CLEANTE: I assure you that I feel very sorry about it.

HARPAGON: I am very happy to see you reasonable again.

CLEANTE: How very kind of you so soon to forget my fault.

HARPAGON: One easily forgets the faults of children when they return to their duty.

CLEANTE: What! you are not angry with me for my extravagant behaviour?

HARPAGON: By your submission and respectful conduct you compel me to forget my anger.

CLEANTE: I assure you, father, I shall keep in heart the remembrance of all your kindness.

HARPAGON: And I promise you that, in future, you will obtain all you like from me.

CLEANTE: Oh, father! I ask nothing more; it is sufficient for me that you give me Marianne.

HARPAGON: What? Who talks of giving you Marianne?

CLEANTE: You, father.

HARPAGON: I? is it not you who promised to give her up?

CLEANTE: Certainly not.

HARPAGON exits.

39
SCENE VI. CLEANTE, LA FLECHE.
LA FLECHE: (leaving the garden with a casket). Sir, you are just in time. Quick! follow me.

CLEANTE: What is the matter?

LA FLECHE: Follow me, I say. We are saved.

CLEANTE: How?

LA FLECHE: Here is all you want.

CLEANTE: What?

LA FLECHE: I have watched for this all day.

CLEANTE: What is it?

LA FLECHE: Your father's treasure that I have got hold of.

CLEANTE: How did you manage it?

LA FLECHE: I will tell you all about it. Let us be quiet: I can hear him calling out.

40
SCENE VII.--HARPAGON, _from the garden, rushing in without his hat, and crying_--
Thieves! thieves! assassins! murder! Justice, just heavens! I am undone; I am murdered; they
have cut my throat; they have stolen my money! Who can it be? Stop! (To himself, taking hold
of his own arm) Give me back my money, wretch.... Ah...! it is myself.... My mind
is wandering, and I know not where I am, who I am, and what I am doing. Alas! my poor
money! my poor money! my dearest friend, they have bereaved me of thee; and since thou
art gone, I have lost my support, my consolation, and my joy. All is ended for me, and I
have nothing more to do in the world! Without thee it is impossible for me to live. It is all
over with me; I can bear it no longer. I am dying; I am dead; I am buried. Is there nobody
who Will call me from the dead, by restoring my dear money to me, or by telling me who
has taken it? I must go. I will demand justice, and have the whole of my house put to the
torture- What a crowd of people are assembled here! Everyone seems to be my thief.
Quick! magistrates, police, provosts, judges, racks, gibbets, and executioners. I will hang
everybody, and if I do not find my money, I will hang myself afterwards.

41
ACT V.

SCENE I.--HARPAGON, A POLICE OFFICER:.

POLICE OFFICER: Leave that to me. I know my business. Thank Heaven! this is not the
first time I have been employed in finding out thieves; and I wish I had as many bags of a
thousand francs as I have had people hanged.

HARPAGON: Every magistrate must take this affair in hand; and if my money is not found,
I shall call justice against justice itself.

POLICE OFFICER: We must take all needful steps. You say there was in that casket...?

HARPAGON: Ten thousand crowns in cash.

POLICE OFFICER: Ten thousand crowns! A considerable theft.

HARPAGON: There is no punishment great enough for the enormity of the crime; and if
it remains unpunished, the most sacred things are no longer secure.

POLICE OFFICER: Whom do you suspect of this robbery?

HARPAGON: Everybody. I wish you to take into custody the whole town and suburbs.

POLICE OFFICER: You must not, if you trust me, frighten anybody, but must use gentle
means to collect evidence, in order afterwards to proceed with more rigour for the recovery
of the sum which has been taken from you.

42
SCENE II.--HARPAGON, THE POLICE OFFICER, MASTER JACQUES.
MASTER JACQUES 1: (at the end of the stage, turning back to the door by which he came
in). I am coming back. Have his throat cut at once; have his feet singed; put him in boiling
water, and hang him up to the ceiling.

HARPAGON: What! Them who have robbed me?

MASTER JACQUES 2: I was speaking of a sucking pig that your steward has just sent
me; and I want to have it dressed for you after my own fancy.

HARPAGON: This is no longer the question; and you have to speak of something else to
this gentleman.

POLICE OFFICER: (to JACQUES). Don't get frightened. I am not a man to cause
any scandal, and matters will be carried on by gentle means.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (to HARPAGON). Is this gentleman coming to supper with you?

POLICE OFFICER: You must, in this case, my good man, hide nothing from your master.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Indeed, Sir, I will show you all I know, and will treat you in the
best manner I possibly can.

POLICE OFFICER: That's not the question.

MASTER JACQUES 1: If I do not give as good fare as I should like, it is the fault of
your steward, who has clipped my wings with the scissors of his economy.

HARPAGON: Rascal! We have other matters to talk about than your supper; and I want
you to tell me what has become of the money which has been stolen from me.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Some money has been stolen from you?

HARPAGON: Yes! And I'll have you hanged if you don't give it me back again.

POLICE OFFICER: (to HARPAGON). Pray, don't be hard upon him. I see by his looks that
he is an honest fellow. Yes, my friend, if you confess, no harm shall come to you, and you
shall be well rewarded by your master. Some money has been stolen from him, and it is
not posible that you know nothing about it.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Sir, since you want me to tell you what I know, I believe it is
your steward who has done this.

HARPAGON: Valere?

MASTER JACQUES 2: Yes.

43
HARPAGON: He who seemed so faithful to me!

MASTER JACQUES 1: Himself. I believe that it is he who has robbed you.

HARPAGON: And what makes you believe it?

MASTER JACQUES 2: What makes me believe it?

HARPAGON: Yes.

MASTER JACQUES 1: I believe it...because I believe it.

POLICE OFFICER: But you must tell us the proofs you have.

HARPAGON: Did you see him hanging about the place where I had put my money?

MASTER JACQUES 2: Yes, indeed. Where was your money?

HARPAGON: In the garden.

MASTER JACQUES 1: Exactly; I saw him loitering about in the garden; and in what was
your money?

HARPAGON: In a casket.

MASTER JACQUES 2: The very thing. I saw him with a casket.

HARPAGON: And this casket, what was it like? I shall soon see if it is mine.

MASTER JACQUES 1: What it was like?

HARPAGON: Yes.

MASTER JACQUES 2: It was like...like a casket.

POLICE OFFICER: Of course. But describe it a little, to see if it is the same.

MASTER JACQUES 1: It was a large casket.

HARPAGON: The one taken from me is a small one.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Yes, small if you look at it in that way; but I call it large because
of what it contains.

HARPAGON: And what colour was it?

44
MASTER JACQUES 1: What colour?

POLICE OFFICER: Yes.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Of a colour...of a certain colour.... Can't you help me to find

the word?

HARPAGON: Ugh!

MASTER JACQUES 1: Red; isn't it?

HARPAGON: No, grey.

MASTER JACQUES 2: Ha! yes, reddish-grey! That's what I meant.

HARPAGON: There is no doubt about it, it's my casket for certain. Write down his evidence,
Sir! Heavens! whom can we trust after that? We must never swear to anything, and I
believe now that I might rob my own self.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (to HARPAGON). There he is coming back, Sir; I beg of you not to
go and tell him that it was I who let it all out, Sir.

45
SCENE III.-HARPAGON, THE POLICE OFFICER:, VALERE, MASTER JACQUES.
HARPAGON: Come, come near, and confess the most abominable action, the most
horrible crime, that was ever committed.

VALERE: What do you want, Sir?

HARPAGON: What, wretch! you do not blush for shame after such a crime?

VALERE: Of what crime do you speak?

HARPAGON: Of what crime I speak? Base villain, as if you did not know what I mean! It is
in vain for you to try to hide it.

VALERE: Sir, since everything is known to you, I will neither deny what I have done nor will
I try to palliate it.

MASTER JACQUES 1: (_aside_). Oh! oh! Have I guessed the truth?

VALERE: I intended to speak to you about it, and I was watching for a favourable opportunity;
but, as this is no longer possible, I beg of you not to be angry, hear my motives.

HARPAGON: And what fine motives can you possibly give me, infamous thief?

VALERE: Ah! Sir, I do not deserve these names. I am guilty towards you, it is true; but,
after all, my fault is pardonable.

HARPAGON: How pardonable? A premeditated trick, and such an assassination as this!

VALERE: When you have heard all I have to say, you will see that the harm is not so
great as you make it out to be.

HARPAGON: The harm not so great as I make it out to be! What! my heart's
blood, scoundrel!

VALERE: Your blood, Sir, has not fallen into bad hands. My rank is high enough not
to disgrace it, and there is nothing in all this for which reparation cannot be made.

HARPAGON: It is my intention that you should restore what you have taken from me.

VALERE: Your honour, Sir, shall be fully satisfied.

HARPAGON: Honour is not the question in all this. But tell me what made you commit
such a deed?

VALERE: Alas! do you ask it?

46
HARPAGON: Yes, I should rather think that I do.

VALERE: A god, Sir, who carries with him his excuses for all he makes people do: Love.

HARPAGON: Love?

VALERE: Yes.

HARPAGON: Fine love that! fine love, indeed! the love of my gold!

VALERE: It is not your wealth that has tempted me; and I swear never to pretend to any
of your possessions, provided you leave me what I have.

HARPAGON: In the name of all the devils, no, I shall not leave it to you. But did anyone
ever meet with such villainy! He wishes to keep what he has robbed me of!

VALERE: Do you call that a robbery?

HARPAGON: If I call that a robbery? A treasure like that!

VALERE: I readily acknowledge that it is a treasure, and the most precious one you have.
But it will not be losing it to leave it to me. I ask you on my knees to leave in my
possession this treasure so full of charms; and if you do right, you will grant it to me.

HARPAGON: I will do nothing of the kind. What in the world are you driving at?

VALERE: Yes, we are engaged to each other for ever.

HARPAGON: I know pretty well how to disengage you, I assure you of that.

VALERE: Nothing but death can separate us.

HARPAGON: You must be devilishly bewitched by my money.

VALERE: I have told you already, Sir, a nobler motive inspired me.

HARPAGON: We shall hear presently that it is out of Christian charity that he covets
my money! But I will put a stop to all this, and justice, impudent rascal, will soon give
me satisfaction.

VALERE: You will do as you please, and I am ready to suffer all the violence you care to
inflict upon me, but I beg of you to believe, at least, that if there is any harm done, I am
the only one guilty, and that your daughter has done nothing wrong in all this.

47
HARPAGON: I should think not! It would be strange, indeed, if my daughter had a share in
this crime. But I will have that treasure back again, and you must confess to what place you
have carried it.

VALERE: I have not carried it off, and it is still in your house.

HARPAGON: My treasure has not left my house?

VALERE: No, Sir.

HARPAGON: Well, then, tell me, have you taken any liberties with...?

VALERE: Ah! Sir, you wrong us both; the flame with which I burn is too pure, too full
of respect. Dame Claude knows the whole truth, and she can bear witness to it.

HARPAGON: Hallo! my servant is an accomplice in this affair?

VALERE: Yes, a witness to our engagement; and it was after being sure of the innocence
of my love that she helped me to persuade your daughter to engage herself to me.

HARPAGON: What rubbish are you talking about my daughter?

VALERE: I say, Sir, that I found it most difficult to make her modesty consent to what my
love asked of her.

HARPAGON: The modesty of whom?

VALERE: Your daughter; and it was only yesterday that she could make up her mind to
sign our mutual promise of marriage.

HARPAGON: My daughter has signed a promise of marriage?

VALERE: Yes, Sir, and I have also signed.

HARPAGON: O heavens! another misfortune!

MASTER JACQUES 2: (to the OFFICER). Write, Sir, write.

HARPAGON: Aggravation of misery! Excess of despair! (To the OFFICER) Sir, discharge
your duty, and draw me up an indictment against him as a thief and a suborner.

MASTER JACQUES 1: As a thief and a suborner.

VALERE: These are names which I do not deserve, and when you know who I am....

48
SCENE IV.--HARPAGON, ELISE, MARIANNE, VALERE, FROSINE, MASTER
JACQUES, THE POLICE OFFICER:.
HARPAGON: Ah! guilty daughter! unworthy of a father like me! You give your love to
an infamous thief, and engage yourself to him without my consent! But you shall both
be disappointed.

VALERE: Your anger will be no judge in this affair, and I shall at least have a hearing before
I am condemned.

HARPAGON: I was wrong to say gallows; you shall be broken alive on the wheel.

ELISE: (kneeling). Ah! Father, be more merciful. He is not what you imagine, and you will
think it less strange that I should have given myself to him, when you know that without
him you would long ago have lost me for ever. Yes, father, it is he who saved me from the
great danger I ran in the waters, and to whom you owe the life of your daughter who....

HARPAGON: All this is nothing; and it would have been much better for me if he
had suffered you to be drowned rather than do what he has done.

ELISE: My father, I beseech you, in the name of paternal love, grant me....

HARPAGON: No, no. I will hear nothing, and justice must have its course.

FROSINE: What a perplexing state of affairs!

49
SCENE V.--ANSELME, HARPAGON, ELISE, MARIANNE, FROSINE, VALERE,
THE POLICE OFFICER:, MASTER JACQUES.
ANSELME: What can have happened, Mr. Harpagon? You are quite upset.

HARPAGON: Ah, Mr. Anselme, you see in me the most unfortunate of men; I am attacked in
my property; and you see there a scoundrel and a wretch who has violated the most sacred
rights, who has introduced himself into my house as a servant in order to steal my money,
and seduce my daughter.

VALERE: Who ever thought of your money about which you rave?

HARPAGON: Yes; they have given each other a promise of marriage. This insult
concerns you, Mr. Anselme; and it is you who ought to be plaintiff against him, and who at
your own expense ought to prosecute him to the utmost, in order to be revenged.

ANSELME: It is not my intention to force anybody to marry me, and to lay claim to a heart
which has already bestowed itself; but as far as your interests are concerned, I am ready
to espouse them as if they were my own.

HARPAGON: This is the gentleman, an honest commissary, who has promised that he will
omit nothing of what concerns the duties of his office. (To the OFFICER, showing
VALERE) Charge him, Sir, as he ought to be, and make matters very criminal.

VALERE: I do not see what crime they can make of my passion for your daughter…

HARPAGON: I don't care a pin for all those stories.

VALERE: Know that I am too upright to adorn myself with a name which is not mine, and
that all Naples can bear testimony to my birth!

ANSELME: Softly! Take care of what you are about to say. You speak before a man to
whom all Naples is known, and who can soon see if your story is true.

VALERE: (proudly putting on his hat). I am not the man to fear anything; and if all Naples
is known to you, you know who was Don Thomas d'Alburci.

ANSELME: Certainly; I know who he is, and few people know him better tan I do.

HARPAGON: I care neither for Don Thomas nor Don Martin. (Seeing two candles
burning, he blows one out.)

ANSELME: Have patience and let him speak; we shall soon know what he has to say of him.

VALERE: That it is to him that I owe my birth.

ANSELME: To him?

50
VALERE: Yes.

ANSELME: Nonsense;Try and make out a more likely story.

VALERE: It is no imposture, and I say nothing here that I cannot prove.

ANSELME: What! You dare to call yourself the son of Don Thomas d'Alburci?

VALERE: Yes, I dare to do so.

ANSELME: This audacity is marvellous. Learn to your confusion that it is now at least
sixteen years ago since the man of whom you speak died in a shipwreck at sea with his
wife and children, when he was trying to save their lives from the cruel persecutions which
accompanied the troubles at Naples, and which caused the banishment of several noble
families.

VALERE: Yes; but learn to your confusion that his son, seven years of age, was, with a
servant, saved from the wreck by a Spanish vessel, and that this son is he who now
speaks to you.

ANSELME: But what other proofs have you besides your own words that all this is not
a fable based by you upon truth.

VALERE: What proofs? The captain of the Spanish vessel; a ruby seal which belonged to
my father; an agate bracelet which my mother put upon my arm; and old Pedro, that servant
who was saved with me from the wreck.

MARIANNE: Alas! I can answer here for what you have said; that you do not deceive us;
and all you say clearly tells me that you are my brother.

VALERE: You my sister!

MARIANNE: Yes, my heart was touched as soon as you began to speak; and our
mother often told me of the misfortunes of our family.

ANSELME: Come to my arms, my children, and share the joy of your happy father!

VALERE: You are our father?

MARIANNE: It was for you that my mother wept?

ANSELME: Yes, my daughter; yes, my son; I am Don Thomas d'Alburci, whom heaven
saved from the waves, and, after sixteen years, believing you all dead, was preparing to
seek the consolations of a new family in marrying a gentle and virtuous woman. I settled
here under the name of Anselme. I wished to forget the sorrows of a name associated
with so many and great troubles.

51
HARPAGON: (_to_ ANSELME). He is your son?

ANSELME: Yes.

HARPAGON: That being so, I make you responsible for the ten thousand crowns that he
has stolen from me.

ANSELME: He steal anything from you!

HARPAGON: Yes.

VALERE: Who said so?

HARPAGON: Master Jacques.

VALERE: (_to_ MASTER JACQUES). You say that?

MASTER JACQUES 1: You see that I am not saying anything.

HARPAGON: He certainly did. There is the officer who has received his deposition.

VALERE: Can you really believe me capable of such a base action?

HARPAGON: Capable or not capable, I must find my money.

CLEANTE enters.

CLEANTE: Do not grieve for your money, father, and accuse any one. I have news of it,
and I come here to tell you that if you consent to let me marry Marianne, your money will be
given back to you.

HARPAGON: Where is it?

CLEANTE: It is in a safe place, and I answer for it; It is for you to decide, you have
the choice either of losing Marianne or your cash-box.

HARPAGON: Has nothing been taken out?

CLEANTE: Nothing at all. Do you agree to this marriage, and to join your consent?

MARIANNE: (to CLEANTE). But you do not know that this consent is no longer sufficient, and
that heaven has given me back a brother (showing VALERE), at the same time that it has given
me back a father (showing ANSELME); and you have now to obtain me from him.

52
ANSELME: Heaven has not restored you to me that I might oppose your wishes. Mr.
Harpagon, come, now, do not force people to say to you what is unnecessary, and
consent, as I do, to this double marriage.

HARPAGON: In order for me to be well advised, I must see my casket.

CLEANTE: You shall see it safe and sound.

HARPAGON: I have no money to give my children in marriage.

ANSELME: Never mind, I have some; do not let this trouble you. Are you satisfied?

HARPAGON: Yes, provided you order me a new suit of clothes for the wedding.

ANSELME: Agreed! Let us go and enjoy the blessings this happy day brings us.

POLICE OFFICER: Stop, Sirs, stop; softly, if you please. Who is to pay me for my writing?

HARPAGON: We have nothing to do with your writing.

POLICE OFFICER: Indeed! and yet I do not pretend to have done it for nothing.

HARPAGON: (showing MASTER JACQUES). There is a fellow you can hang in payment!

MASTER JACQUES 2: Alas! what is one to do? I receive a good cudgelling for telling
the truth, and now they would hang me for lying.

ANSELME: Mr. Harpagon, you must forgive him this piece of imposture.

HARPAGON: You will pay the officer then?

ANSELME: Let it be so. Let us go quickly, my children, to share our joy with your mother!

HARPAGON: And I to see my dear casket.

*** END OF THE MISER ***

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