Neuro Linguistic Programming

NLP Techniques to Build Confidence,

Overcome Fear, and Create Permanent
Change Today
Table of Contents:

Introduction

1.) Neuro Linguistic Programming and You

2.) Setting the Stage for Confidence and Positivity

3.) Exercises to Re-Energize and Rise Above Challenges

4.) Take Charge & Kick Bad Habits

5.) Improve Your Productivity and Overcome Your Fears

Conclusion + Your FREE Audiobook!

Introduction

I want to thank you and congratulate you for downloading my book, “

Neuro Linguistic Programming - NLP Techniques to Build Confidence,
Overcome Fear and Create Permanent Change Today ” .

This book contains proven steps and strategies to improve your life
drastically, by giving you tools to succeed in whatever your version of
“success” entails. The information and techniques we’ll cover flexible
enough to apply to your own unique circumstances, need and goals.

Everything starts from your mind, and when you think big, you should also
begin to expect big. Success, wealth, and happiness are your birthright as a
human being—there is no need to expect, or settle for anything less. We
each deserve to live a life that we find rewarding, rich, and fulfilling. Using
the NLP techniques covered in this book, and my other NLP books, you’ll
learn to be in control of your mind, and ultimately, your life.

After reading this book, working through the examples, and experiencing
the power of NLP first-hand, positive change in your life will be inevitable!
You’ll have all of the tools you need to start making progress towards your
version of success immediately!

Thanks again for downloading my book, and I’m excited to explore the
fascinating and powerful world of NLP together! Let’s get started!
©
Copyright 2014 by Nicholas A. Moreno- All rights reserved.

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Chapter 1 – Neuro Linguistic Programming &
You

This book is intended to be jam-packed with particle examples and action

steps you can use to experience real, lasting change, and rest assured—we
will get there! Before we do, however, a basic understanding of NLP and its
core concepts will help you be more effective when putting the skills we
cover into practice. So, let’s begin with a quick primer on the basics of NLP.

What is Neuro Linguistic Programming?

Neuro Linguistic Programming, or NLP, includes a number of mental

processes and patterns that govern a person’s behavior, and also how
flexible the person ’ s mind is to change. NLP encompasses strategic
thinking combined with cognitive and mental processes which make up a
person ’ s behavior. By understanding the concepts and techniques, NLP
empowers you to develop your own state of excellence, while also creating
views and assumptions, and learning how to change and communicate
effectively with yourself, and your surrounding environment.

Neuro Linguistic Programming is about discovering yourself, your purpose,

and your identity, and then moving towards your state of true excellence.
NLP is quite powerful, but also a lot of fun to put into practice!

The Power to Change

With NLP, you’ll learn effective techniques to let go of everything in your
past that’s been holding you back (whether or not you realize it!) in order
for you to have complete control of your life, and your future.

Let’s try a simple exercise now. Start off with a few deep breaths. Allow
your muscles to relax, and as your mind and body are beginning to relax,
your eyes will become heavier with every breath you take.

Visualize yourself walking into a stream: you are surrounded by trees, and
the water is clear and clean. You are in a serene and tranquil place, all alone,
and completely safe from harm. Now, see yourself lying in the water as
your body begins to float. Your body weight is completely supported by the
water beneath you.

You begin to chant, “ I am safe, I am protected ”, and you start to notice the
sounds of a waterfall. As it comes into sight, you can clearly distinguish the
water cascading downwards, and you can feel the cool mist on your skin.
You now move under the waterfall and feel as light as a feather, lighter than
you have ever felt before, as you begin to let everything go.

Now, you start to focus on what is right in front of you, a stream of water
ready to continue the journey with you. The waterfall allows your focus to
move into the present moment as you repeat the mantra, “ I believe what I
do today has a direct influence on my future. I only think positive thoughts,
since I am in control of my own life. ”

As you come out of the water you notice something different about
yourself, your mood, and your mentality. You are starting to feel the energy
and power that will propel you onwards.
Now that you’ve completed that visualization exercise, take note of what
you learned about yourself, your views, your beliefs, and your inhibitions.
The more you practice this exercise, the more you’ll gain! Now, let’s learn
how to overcome a common fear: the fear of failure.

Overcoming a Fear of Failure

One of the most common inhibitors of success is the fear of failure—ironic,

isn’t it? The reality is, all fear is rooted internally; in your mind. This is
good for us, because it means we can also use our minds to overcome and
conquer this fear.

You must not allow fear to stop you from achieving what you are meant to
achieve. Once you release these fears, you’ll feel a weight lifted from your
shoulders, and you’ll feel completely free to succeed.

Let’s try another exercise: Begin by taking a deep breath. With every deep
breath, your body relaxes more and more. Let go of all the tension you have
in your muscles. Now, close your eyes while continuing to breathe deeply
and as slowly as possible and allow both your mind and body to achieve a
state of relaxation.

Next, picture yourself on a completely empty street. While you walk

around, take note of the structures and how neglected and dilapidated they
look. The buildings have no signs, and the windows show there’s nothing
inside. The buildings looks abandoned and dark. The wind starts blowing
all of the dust up around you and you start to feel a bit scared. There is
nowhere for you to hide; you stand there asking yourself how you even got
here in the first place.
Now, yo u sit down, and instead of being afraid you allow your mind begin
to think happy thoughts. You think back to a specific happy memory from
childhood, or from recently. Then, you start to think about how mesmerized
and amazed you were at the first magic show you ever saw. You now start
to think only positive thoughts as you start to open your eyes.

You are still in the middle of the empty street, but you are no longer afraid.
You know that this is not the destination you want, and it’s also not the
destination that you deserve, so without any more time, you begin to walk
straight ahead. Your focus is now completely absorbed in the path ahead of
you and you push your fear aside as you continue walking. Your heart beats
quietly as you see the emerging bright, new horizon.

Slowly, you see yourself entering a new street where everything is bright
and sunny. You see people laughing, talking and walking on the street.
When you look around again you see all of the buildings and offices are
bustling, full of people. You know in this instance that this is where you
want to be and you are no longer scared.

Patience is a Virtue

While NLP is effective at making quick mental changes, it’s still important
to realize and accept that everything in life is a process, and you need to
work for your own success. While you’re pursuing your goals, realize that
in most cases, they will not happen overnight. Making progress each day is
the best course of action—focusing on the bigger picture will help you
realize that each little setback is just that: a little setback in your grand
journey towards success. Adopting this mindset will put your mind at ease.

In order to utilize your patience, follow these proven steps:

Using breathing techniques we’ve practiced in the first 2 exercises, get into
a state of deep relaxation. Once there, tell yourself, “ I am patient and I
understand that only the present exists. Tomorrow, and the concepts of the
past remain elusive. ” This should then be followed by, “ I am patient. I let
go of the past as it can never be relived. The future is nonexistent so there is
no need or reason for me to worry about it. All that matters is what today
brings. ”

Be open with yourself and tell yourself, “ I am patiently developing and

creating my future with what I think and do today. I will enjoy every
moment. There is no reason for me to worry about my future. ” You need to
tell yourself that you are patiently living in the present, safe in the
knowledge that everything will come together eventually!

Feel Good About You

When you feel good about yourself, you stay positive when things don’t go
as planned. This is exactly what you need to focus on in order to attract
success into your life!

Picture yourself on a giant movie screen that is directly in front of you.

Look closely and visualize yourself clearly. Take in the color of your
clothes, your facial expression, watch what you are doing and take in the
scenery that is behind you. It is important for you to make all of the details
as real as possible.

Next imagine your “ screen self ” is feeling really good at this moment. See
yourself and this version of you on the screen merging into one and by
doing so you have allowed the real you to feel good too. Tell yourself, “ I
deserve to feel good and deserve this. ” Continue to tell yourself how
amazing you feel, reiterate and reinforce the ideal that you have never felt
happier! Today marks a new stage in your life, where each day is the
happiest one yet.

Whenever you feel down because of stress or disappointments, try

revisiting yourself on the screen, feeling fantastic.

Resolve to m ake today the start of a new you; let ’ s begin by imagining
you are standing in a fork in the road. Which direction will you choose?
Will you go down the path that leads to success or the path which will
ultimately lead you to failure? If you have chosen the former, don ’ t think
you are in for a worry and stress free life. The confidence that you are on
the path to success, however, makes any problem that arises into a minor
bump in your path to success. These little bumps might even make success
that much sweeter!

Let ’ s start as we mean to go on and learn a meditation technique to

achieve stillness and calm. This practice can be used any time, and for any
exercise in this book in order to get into a state of mental and physical
relaxation.

Start by s itting somewhere comfortable. Close your eyes and take deep,
slow breaths as you start counting down from 10 to 1, whilst accounting for
each number as follows:

10 – Allow your body to fully relax

9 – Begin to feel yourself let go

8 – See the number as you continue to immerse yourself deeper into

relaxation
7 – See the number clearly and let it go

6 – At this point you are relaxing deeply

5 – Take your time as you fall deeper and deeper into total body relaxation

4 – Rid your mind completely of any thoughts or outside noises

3 – See the number as you let everything go

2 – You are falling further and deeper into total relaxation

1 – You have now reached a state of complete, deep relaxation

Once you have completed the above exercise, you’ll be in a state where
your mind can accept anything you present it. You control all of your
thoughts, so you have the power to truly access and reprogram your mind.
Once in this state, the NLP techniques we cover will be even more effective
than when fully conscious!
Chapter 2 – Setting the Stage For Confidence &
Positivity

Many people allow themselves to lose their positive nature over time,
especially if life isn ’ t going to plan. Stress happens, and setbacks happen.
Everyone, even the most successful people, experience pain in their lives.
However, there is no reason to accept this state as permanent. You can help
yourself move through any situation. Every time you need a boost to your
confidence, simply breathe deeply and unleash your imagination!

Let’s try another exercise: Start by letting your mind relax, and take deep,
slow breaths. Once again, visualize yourself on a movie screen which is
directly in front of you. You have complete control over your movie-screen
self. Now, imagine that you are in a situation where you want to feel more
confident. Visualize yourself clearly. For example, if you want to be more
confident in order to present and pitch a project proposal to a group of
potential clients, picture yourself in front of the client. See all of the images
clearly: how you are dressed, your posture, what you are doing, the way
your audience is reacting, and how they are interacting with you. Make
these images vivid as possible.

Reinforce the following to yourself: “ I am doing well, I can handle this. I

feel great about myself, and I’m confident with all of the preparation and
work I have done for this project. ”

Reflect on what you see on the screen and imagine this all happening for
real. Congratulate yourself for a job well-done! Remind yourself how
confident you are in your skills and everything you are capable of
achieving.
Stay Positive

Understandably, there are and will be times when it is hard to stay positive;
particularly, if you are faced with a number of day-to-day challenges.
Realizing that you are in control of your thoughts, and that you have the
power to focus on, and manifest whatever you desire is one of the best parts
about NLP.

Understanding the way the mind works is key. If you were to compare your
body to a ship, you mind would be the captain that runs the ship. The
thoughts that you focus on will determine the way the ship will travel. And
sometimes, the captain allows the ship to go on auto-pilot, even if the ship
doesn’t realize it.

Feeding your mind with negative thoughts will only leave you negative and
afraid. Conversely, nurturing positivity will create a positive and happy life.
Which do you choose?

Let ’ s try another exercise: Imagine that your mind is a car that is running
on empty. The only way to reach your destination is to put some fuel in
your car. In the same way, by feeding your mind positive fuel (thoughts), it
will work in a far more positive, efficient manner. Positive fuel can take on
all manner of guises such as reading thought enlightening books, watching a
feel-good film, listening to upbeat music, meditating, sitting in the sun, or
playing with your family or pet.

Life is meant to be enjoyed! Think of all the things that make you happy
whether this be hearing your children laugh or tasting your favorite cake. It
really does not matter what reminder you use, providing it is something that
makes you feel happy. Tell yourself: “ This is a great day. Everyday is a
great day, and I am happy. I control my thoughts. I think positive thoughts,
and I feel spectacular. ” Always fuel your mind with positive words and
analogies. Always make sure that you are looking for things all of the time
that make you feel positive.

Creating and Organizing your Environment

Your mind is only completely clear when you are focused and organized.
The following is a great exercise in organization:

Begin by imagining yourself going into a home that is already well-

organized .Everything has a purpose and a place, whether it is functional, or
simply there to add beauty.

Hear yourself saying, “ This is who I am. I am an organized person who is

capable of creating this environment. ” Visualize yourself as you continue
to explore all of the areas of the home, and feel as the calm washes over
you. Tell yourself, “ I am an organized person and my whole persona and
environment reflect my simplicity and beauty. I happily commit to set 30
minutes a day to create this tranquil, calm environment.” Creating a
peaceful, clean, organized space can have a much greater effect on your
mood and productivity that you might think. Try it out and see!

Feeling Like You Don ’ t Matter

Many types of people put themselves down and belittle themselves,

particularly those who are poor and have little or no education. They feel as
though there is absolutely nothing they can do to improve their life; they
feel helpless.
If there are times when you feel as though you don’t matter, remember that
each of us has a special gift—it may just be that you haven’t found it yet.
The following exercise has been designed to help you understand you are
just as worthy as everyone else:

Get into your state of relaxation, using the breathing techniques we’ve
learned. Now, start to ponder this idea: Have you ever wondered how all the
stars in the night sky look the same, even though scientists have a name for
some and not others? The reality is that every star is different, in the same
way as every human is different. Even twins have their differences; this is
because each individual is unique.

You need to tell yourself, “ I am unique and there is no one quite like me. I
am perfect just the way I am. I may have minor flaws, but I also have many
of my own distinctive strengths. ” Remember, when others look down on
you this is merely a reflection of their own behavior and mindset.

How we view others is often a direct projection of how we view ourselves.

If anyone ever does treat you poorly, or as if you don’t matter, the
underlying reason is because that’s how they feel about themselves.

If you as a person remain poor, this is because you are not giving yourself
any kind of chance to improve your life. Repeat to yourself, “ I have my
own skill set and I am using all of my skills to improve my own life. ”

While some people view rich, wealthy people as selfish, another interesting
viewpoint is this:

Poor people are selfish. Anyone and everyone has a special gift that they
can become so good at, the world would pay them for their expertise in this
area. No matter what it is, someone out there will pay for it if you do it well.
Poor people are selfish because they haven’t started sharing their gift with
the world —they’re keeping it inside. Sharing your special gift—no matter
what it is—will release this selfishness and attract wealth and abundance.
Chapter 3 – Exercises to Re-Energize & Rise
Above Challenges

There is no doubt that the daily grind can be exhausting and leave you
feeling completely drained. This is one of the reasons why it is so important
that you take the time to re – energize in order to get back to your full
working potential without losing any time.

The following exercise will help you re – energize and be ready to move on
quickly:

Begin by imagining that you are walking on a picture-perfect sandy beach

surrounded by pristine waters. As you continue to walk further, you see that
it is almost sunset and you have reached a stunning lagoon. While you
watch the sun descending into the water you, stand and take in its total and
utter beauty.

You enter the water in the lagoon and feel the water lapping at your waist,
and as you sit down you begin to float. Let yourself go as you are floating
freely and your body begins to totally relax. You are now looking up into
the night sky and the stars are twinkling and shining brightly. You see the
Milky Way as it comes into full view, and you feel your body floating
towards it. You are now floating deep into the galaxy as you begin to feel
energized and completely relaxed.

You body now starts floating back into the lagoon, the water has gone cold
and you stand up feeling completely rejuvenated. You walk back along the
beach feeling totally rested, and as you look back at the lagoon, you commit
to memory the experience. You know that this is a place that you can come
back to whenever you feel the need to.

Rise Above the Challenges in Life

Everyone experiences ups and downs in life—we all know that! Nobody is
immune to bad things happening when they’re out of your control, but what
you can control is your reaction and your mindset. In a way, these bumps in
the road are a gift. When you are faced with obstacles and challenges, you
have to fight your way through and put in extra effort—it’s often that extra
push that gets you over the mountain!

The following exercises will help you rise above the challenges and get you
through whatever life decides to throw at you:

Picture yourself in a scenario with someone that you have had problems
working with. Think about just one situation where you had a disagreement
with this person. If a number of people and many situations spring to mind,
set these aside, as you need to focus on one person and situation in every
session.

Visualize a scene where the person approaches you and begins an argument.
As they continue to go on and on, imagine them shrinking until they stand
about three inches in height. As they are shrinking, their voice also becomes
more and more difficult to hear and understand. As the person shrinks, you
are growing taller and taller until such a point that you are looming over
them. You are now so tall that your head is almost in the clouds. Feel the
fluffy clouds that surround you, and take in just how blue the sky is.

Begin to tell yourself, “ I feel wonderful, I can rise above everything, I am

bigger than anybody who puts me down. I am bigger than any of my
problems, or any difficult situations that I may be faced with. ”

Again, it truly is all about your mindset and how you handle the ups and
downs of life. Will you accept the bumps in the road and allow them to
weigh you down, or will you see them as learning opportunities and try
something different to get to your goal? Knowing that the choice is yours is
quite empowering!

Fighting Stress

We all encounter things each day that could cause stress in our lives, if we
decide to let them. It’s important to recognize that we also have plenty of
things in our lives each day that bring us joy, fulfillment, and other positive
emotions. Cultivating the habit of focusing on the positives, rather than the
negatives will aid in fighting off stress in the long run.

That being said, even the most positive people will succumb to stress at
times. And that’s totally ok! Know that you are not alone, and that
tomorrow is a new day.

When you truly feel stress weighing down on you, u se the following
exercise. With each and every time you practice it, you’ll notice that you
remain positive more and more frequently, and stress rears its ugly head less
and less:

Tell yourself, “ Everything is working out exactly as it should. I remain

positive and calm. ”

Think about a time that you stayed positive, even when you were faced with
a large amount of work, or a particularly challenging situation. Realize that
when you stay positive, you are in complete control. You remain totally
focused on whatever task you have to hand.

By continuing to keep a positive attitude, you can think clearly and see the
most appropriate course of action for each individual problem. At this point,
remind yourself: “ I know that am capable of working through this. I easily
find the solutions to my problems, and I know exactly what I need to do and
have no reason to worry. ” Allowing yourself to take deep and easy breaths,
continue repeating this phrase until it sinks in. Eventually, you’ll it will
begin to feel natural, and you’ll feel confident in the truth of that statement.

Open up and Allow Yourself to Receive

The law of attraction states that what we focus on and what we expect,
becomes our reality. With this in mind, focusing on the positive outcomes
you want in your life— not the negatives that might happen— is far more
important than most people realize By staying positive, you attract even
more positivity into your life!

Think nothing but positive thoughts and reject any thoughts of poverty,
illness and sadness. Replace these with thoughts of good health, happiness
and financial security. There is nothing wrong with desiring wealth and
happiness—it is your right as a human being to experience the best life you
possibly can, and desiring to reach and exceed your true potential is not at
all selfish.

Tell yourself, “ I am open to everything that the world has to offer me; I am
open to good health and happiness. ” “ I am a money magnet and attract
wealth easily while remaining happy and healthy. Money, happiness, and
good health flow freely in my life, and I am sharing them freely with the
world.”
Being Grateful

Having a grateful attitude ensures that positive things continue to flow

towards you. Noticing when you are receiving, and being grateful in these
instances will ensure they keep coming. As you can see, grace ties in deeply
with the law of attraction!

If you find you need help feeling grateful, try the following:

Visualize yourself up on the peak of a mountain. take in the magnificent

view and revel in the beauty of the world around you. You have climbed to
the highest peak and are surrounded by beautiful clouds. You take a step out
onto one of the clouds, and it begins to move, carrying you safely along.
You know the cloud is taking you to a fabulous place where you’ll find total
calm and peace, you just don’t know exactly where yet. But, you’re excited,
and open to this opportunity to see what the universe has in store for you.

As the cloud transports you forward, you feel your body completely
relaxing. Now, you are sinking into the calm of this beautiful place where
the cloud has delivered you. The gentle breeze and the warmth of the sun
penetrate your skin. Tell yourself, “ I am truly grateful for this stunning
place, and I am so grateful to be right where I am, right in this moment. I
have gratitude for everything that is all around me. I relish the peace and
tranquility that I am experiencing at this point in my life. ”

While you marvel at the beauty of the nature all around you, think about all
of the good things that you currently have in your life. Think about your
family, friends, your business, your house and all of the other good things
that you can think of.
Now focus again and tell yourself, “ I am grateful for the gift that is my life,
my health, my spirit, my family, and my willingness to focus on myself and
continually improve. ”

As you continue to think of all of the wonderful things that you have in
your life, recite all of the things that you are most grateful for. Feel the
complete joy of being grateful for everything, big or small, that you have in
your life today.
Chapter 4 - Take Charge & Kick Bad Habits

A big part of feeling good is knowing that you look good—feeling

confident in your skin! For example, if you want to lead a healthy lifestyle,
but you are slightly overweight, losing the weight will help you feel good
both physically, and mentally. As we’ve learned, you have the power to
make this change, but also, the responsibility lies solely on your shoulders.
Start by congratulating yourself with a big pat on the back for making the
decision to take ownership and change your life in a positive way!

Try this exercise: Picture yourself walking in your local park. There are
many other people around who cannot help but look at you with admiring
glances and all of your friends are also taking notice of how great you look.
As you continue to walk, you feel lighter and bursting with energy. You feel
completely fabulous in your new body, and as you walk back to your house,
you catch sight of yourself in the glass window. You think and say to
yourself, “ I am fit, I am healthy, I love the way I look right now with my
new body. I am vibrant, I am happy, and I feel fabulous. ”

From this moment onwards you need to commit yourself to changing your
mentality to one where your health and confidence are priorities. Focusing
on losing weight can sometimes cause people to take drastic measures, such
as extreme dieting. These methods are short-lived, and often end in binging
on unhealthy foods, ending with feelings of guilt, remorse, and failure.

Instead, try changing your mindset to one that focuses on health and
confidence. Feeling physically good, looking good, and nourishing your
body appropriately are much more affective mindsets to adopt for long-term
success. I know, because I’ve done it!
Kicking Bad Habits

If you want to make improvements to your life, you need to learn how to
change your habits. Once you know how, it’s easy! For example if you want
to lead a healthier lifestyle, you’d need to quit smoking—breaking the habit
of reaching for a cigarette every time a certain emotion or thought arises.

In order to start kicking any bad habits you may have, you need to practice
the following:

Begin by practicing deep and slow breathing until your whole body is
completely relaxed. Think about the bad habits that you want to break in
order to achieve a healthier, happier lifestyle. If you have a number of
habits that you want to overcome, work through them one at a time.

Using the smoking example: Start by telling yourself, “ I don’t smoke. It’s
not who I am. I live a healthy lifestyle, and the thought of smoking disgusts
me. ” Visualize yourself throwing away any packets of cigarettes and
smoking paraphernalia, knowing that you are ridding yourself for good.

Tell yourself, “ I am far better off without these; I am healthy, strong and
happy, and in complete control of my life. Most importantly, I feel great. ”

Stop Procrastinating

Some people put off doing things until later because they fear being
criticized or failing. You can overcome this fear by thinking about all of
your capabilities and positive attributes. For example, if you were given an
assignment at work from your manager, instead of thinking “Why would
my manager pile all this work on me?” Try reframing the situation as such:
“My manager gave me this work because he knows, just as I know, that I
am capable, intelligent, and produce quality work. My manager is trusts me
and has faith in me to do a good job, and I know I can deliver and exceed
his expectations.”

Think about the first project that you completed and submitted to your
manager and how you were commended for it. Now, visualize yourself in
your daily routine. See yourself determined to finish whatever work you
have in hand. Regroup your mind and take control. Tell yourself, “ I am
finishing this work now. I have everything I need to finish my work now. I
will not slack off or disappoint my boss. I am the best at what I do. ”

Let Go of Your Emotions

It’s easy to let emotions get the best of you when you haven’t yet learned to
control them This can be an inhibitor at times, particularly when you need
to make a firm decision. You need to be able to let your emotions and think
rationally on demand.

Try this example the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed by emotion:

Practice deep, slow breathing and feel your body as it begins to completely
relax. Be completely aware of all of your feelings and think about the issues
that you have in hand. You must decide on something important right now,
but you cannot think clearly because your judgment is being overshadowed
by your emotions.

Continue relaxing, but become aware and in touch with that feeling whilst
you tell yourself, “ I am scared of making the incorrect decision. ”
Acknowledge this feeling. Now visualize yourself drifting into a dark room,
bringing your negative emotion with you. Begin to descend deeper and
deeper into the dark. Understand why you feel this way. Search within
yourself to find the source of your fear. Let your mind wander here.

Now, feel your body floating away from the dark room yet leaving the
negative emotions behind you. Feel your body going into a brighter room
feeling far more relaxed. Now you can see clearly as you have released the
negative emotion of fear and now you are ready to make that huge decision.
Tell yourself, “ I am calm, relaxed, and I truly feel great. ”

The Art of Negotiation

If you want to communicate and negotiate with other people effectively,

patience and understanding are valuable qualities to develop. When you are
involved in discussions or meetings, it is inevitable that you will have
disagreements along the way, where neither party is right or wrong: they
each simply have their own beliefs. Having an open mind, and
understanding and listening to what others have to say will help get you
there.

Repeat to yourself, “ I am open to other people ’ s opinions, I understand

where they are coming from and I am willing to listen. I already know my
own ideas, and it is time that I learn theirs, whether or not I end up agreeing
with them. ”

By undertaking this stance and seeing a situation through another’s eyes,

you can negotiate a solution that everyone can at least tolerate Portray your
position of power, the power of knowledge, respect, and inquisitiveness.
Ask questions and understand the views of others. All the time you are
asking questions, you are taking control and leading by example.
When others have finished speaking, repeat what they have told you to
ensure you have understood them. Although you are still in control, you
have shown others that they too have a say in the decision making process.

As you have exercised patience and open-mindedness, you can begin

negotiating from the “ position of knowledge. ” This is how you can
convince others to implement your ideal without appearing overbearing.
Chapter 5 – Improve Your Productivity and
Overcome Your Fears

Productivity creates a sense of accomplishment, boosts our self-esteem, and

has a ripple effect—making us want to be even more productive on a
regular basis, and making those around us want to be more productive as
well! To maximize productivity, becoming a master of your mind and
emotions is essential, so you can block out any distractions that might arise.

Let’s go over some NLP techniques that will help you shut off distractions
so you can stay completely focused on the task at hand:

Begin by reaching a state of total relaxation using the deep breathing

techniques discussed earlier. See yourself at your desk working on a project.
Watching yourself from a detached perspective, notice how you are fully
focused, yet completely calm and happy.

Tell yourself, “ I am productive and focus on one task at a time. I easily stay
calm and level-headed. I simply do things one at a time until I have
completed everything. I start with the most difficult or most important, and
I take time for short breaks but I easily return to the task when it’s time to
do so. I am happy working on my tasks, and with each and every one I
complete, I feel more energized and more productive. ”

Let Go and Stop Criticizing Yourself

Have you ever heard the term: “I am my own worst enemy”? It’s
unfortunate, but many people who don’t realize that we are in complete
control of our mind and emotional state feel they are victim to their inner
voice and self-criticism.

As we’ve discussed, this inner voice comes from deep-rooted beliefs that
we haven’t taken the time to truly understand and move past. When our
subconscious beliefs are in conflict with our conscious decisions or actions,
we hear this inner voice criticizing us. “I’m big-boned, and can never lose
weight”, or “I was born poor and will always be poor”. We use these as
excuses—a way to put off dealing with and resolving the deeper issues.

When we achieve a state of deep relaxation and interact with our

subconscious, we can ask it to help us in finding a permanent solution.
Because of the subconscious mind’s immense power, it is not uncommon to
resolve harmful beliefs in just a few sessions, or even in one session with
the help of a trained professional.

It’s very common for people to be overly-critical of themselves. However,

you need to understand that no one is perfect, and everyone makes
mistakes. As long as you learn from them, the mistakes are serving a
purpose and actually helping you get to your goal!

If self-criticism is something that you have difficulty with, try out the
following technique:

Begin by closing your eyes and achieving a state of deep relaxation. Revisit
a time when you were overcritical of something that you did wrong. Rather
than berating yourself for making the mistake, accept what has happened.
Resolve the thought into one or two take-away bullet points that you
learned from going through that issue. Now, visualize yourself floating far
above the scene, taking with you only a piece of paper with your bullet
points written down. Everything else about the situation is released and
beneath you.

Next, visualize yourself taking on a new project and completing it easily

and perfectly. Let go of any self-criticism, embrace your weaknesses and
enhance your strengths. Tell yourself, “ I am positive. I made a mistake, but
I have learned from it and I am easily moving on. ”

Reach Your Goals

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we
are powerful beyond measure. “ ~ Marianne Williamson

Take a look at the above quote and let it sink in for a few minutes.

Really think about this quote, and what it means to you. By understanding
how our minds work, and using NLP techniques, y ou can truly achieve
anything. Isn’t it interesting how it’s often the people who have the hardest
lives who rise to the top, and those who are born privileged and spoiled end
up wasting their lives away?

All you need to do is believe. You should never set limitations on anything
that you want to do. Begin by focusing on your goals; never lose sight of
your hopes and dreams. By remaining focused you will not settle for
anything less. It’s most often ourselves who set limitations, whether or not
we tell ourselves that it’s someone or something else that’s holding us back.

Tell yourself: “I can accomplish anything that I set my mind to, I am worthy
of getting everything from this world because I am a winner. I may fail now
and then with small things, but I will learn and rise again, and in the long
run, I will prevail. I will use obstacles that get in my way as stepping stones
to achieving my goals.”

Be Assertive

Your ideas are important, and they matter. Your voice and your opinion are
your birthright, never let anyone tell you otherwise.

Just because you are not the boss or in charge from a corporate standpoint,
this does not mean that your ideas do not matter. Just because you don’t
have a high-school diploma does not mean that you will never accomplish
anything with your life. Just because you’ve had a hard past doesn’t mean
you can’t create the future you desire and you deserve.

Tell yourself, “ I am as capable as everyone else. I am even more capable

that most people, because I understand the true power of my own mind. I
have no fear of voicing my opinions and sharing my ideas. I am excited
about learning new things and I impress others with what I can do. I am
worthy of success, and I am a leader.

Overcoming Fear

One of the most common phobias that people suffer from is the fear of
speaking in public. It’s actually the number one fear, above the fear of
death! Wow!

The reason people fail at anything is because they let their fear take over
and get the better of them. It is only natural to feel nervous every time you
need to speak in public. If you don’t feel a little nervous about something
big like an event or a presentation, it’s not very important to you. However,
if you have done the necessary preparation, there is absolutely no reason or
point in being anxious to the point where it takes a toll on your
performance.

The following words have been designed to help you overcome a fear of
public speaking:

After achieving a state of relaxation, t ell yourself, “ I am confident in my

abilities. I believe in myself, and people love me. People find me friendly
and warm, and they are drawn to me. These people respond to me because I
have integrity and they enjoy being in my company. As soon as I get up to
speak in front of people, they feel my warmth immediately. As I stand in
front of these people calm and poised, I am able to connect with them
deeply. I am confident when I deliver my presentation, and when I speak,
people listen. I speak with conviction and authority. ”
Conclusion

Thanks again for downloading my book!

I hope you’ve taken away an understanding of basic NLP principles, and why they’re so
effective in improving confidence.

Did you like my book or find it helpful? Leave me an honest Review on Amazon!

Thanks in advance :)

To your success,

John C. Stanford
P.S. Don’t forget your free bonus!

==> Click here to get your FREE Bonus: Life Mastery Toolkit
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