Self-Concept:

ACTUAL SELF—The self that reflects who we actually are, based on our thoughts, feelings, appearance,
and behavior. It is built on self-knowledge derived from social interactions. The actual self is our self
image.

Ideal Self—The self that reflects who we aspire to be, based on learned experiences, societal influences,
and personal aspirations.

Self-Concept— The awareness of oneself, negotiating between the actual self and the ideal self.

Negotiation —exists between the two selves which is complex because there are numerous exchanges
between the ideal and actual self. These exchanges are exemplified in social roles that are adjusted and
re-adjusted, and are derived from outcomes of social interactions from infant to adult development.

Alignment— The importance of alignment between the actual self and the ideal self for mental well-
being. Incongruence between the two can lead to distress or anxiety.

Personal Development— Aimed at increasing self-knowledge to enhance alignment between the actual
self and the ideal self.

Self-knowledge — is derived from social interactions that provide insight into how others react to you.
The actual self is built on self-knowledge.

Personal Effectiveness:

-Making use of all the personal resources talents, skills, energy and time, to enable you to achieve life
goals.

- Your knowledge of yourself and how you manage yourself impacts directly on.

-Being self-aware, making the most of your strengths, learning new skills and techniques and behavioral
flexibility are all keys to improving your personal performance.

- Depends on our Innate Characteristics, talent and experience accumulated in the process of personal
development. Talents first are needed to be identified and then developed to be used in a particular
subject area (science, literature, sports, politics, etc.).

-Knowledge is required for setting goals, defining an action plan to achieve them and risk assessment.
Skills also determine whether real actions are performed in accordance with the plan. If the same ability
is used many times in the same situation, then it becomes a habit that runs automatically,
subconsciously. Here are some skills that will greatly increase the efficiency of any person who owns
them:

1. Determination—It allows you to focus only on achieving a specific goal without being distracted by
less important things or spontaneous desires. It may be developed with the help of self-discipline
exercise.

2. Self-confidence— It appears in the process of personal development, as a result of getting aware of

3. Persistence— It makes you keep moving forward regardless of emerging obstacles - problems,
laziness, bad emotional state, etc. It reduces the costs of overcoming obstacles. It can also be developed
with the help of self- discipline exercise.

4. Managing stress— It helps combat stress that arises in daily life from the environment and other
people. Stress arises from the uncertainty in an unknown situation when a lack of information creates
the risk of negative constances of your actions. It increases efficiency in the actively changing
environment.

5. Problem-solving skills—They help cope with the problems encountered with a lack of experience. It
increases efficiency by adopting new ways of achieving goals when obtaining a new experience.

6. Creativity—It allows you to find extraordinary ways to carry out a specific action that no one has tried
to use. It can lead to a decrease or an increase of costs, but usually the speed of action is greatly
increased when using creative tools.

7. Generating ideas—It helps you achieve goals using new, original, unconventional ideas. Idea is a
mental image of an object formed by the human mind, which can be changed before being
implemented in the real world. For generating ideas you can use a method of mental maps, which
allows you to materialize, visualize and scrutinize all your ideas, which in turn contributes to the
emergence of new ideas. These are just some, but the most important personal effectiveness skills
which make the achievement of any goal easier and costly.

Three types of people in the world:

1. Moviegoer— Someone who feels like they have no control over their life and merely observes things
happening to them.

2. Actor— Someone who recognizes they have some control over their life and can influence outcomes
through their actions, but still feels limited by external factors.

3. Scriptwriter— Someone who actively shapes their own life by making choices and decisions, feeling
empowered to create their desired outcomes.

Developmental Stages:

-Human Development focuses on human growth and changes across the lifespan, including physical,
cognitive, social, intellectual, perceptual, personality and emotional growth.

-The study of human developmental stages is essential to understanding how humans learn, mature and
adapt. Throughout their lives, humans go through various stages of development.

-The human being is either in a state of growth or decline, but either imparts change. Some aspects of
our life change very little over time, are consistent. Other aspects change dramatically. By understanding
these changes, we can better respond and plan ahead effectively.

1. Pre-natal (Conception to birth)

-Age when hereditary endowments and sex are and all body features, both external and internal are
developed.

2. Infancy (Birth to 2 years)

-Foundation age when basic behavior are organized and many ontogenetic maturation skills are
developed.

3. Early Childhood (2 to 6 years)

-Pre-gang age, exploratory, and questioning. Language and Elementary reasoning are acquired and initial
socialization is experienced.
4. Late Childhood (6 to 12 years)

-Gang and creativity age when self-help skills, social skills, school skills, and play are developed.

5. Adolescence (puberty to 18 years)

-Transition age from childhood to adulthood when sex maturation and rapid physical development
occur resulting to changes in ways of feeling, thinking and acting.

6. Early Adulthood (18 to 40 years)

-Age of adjustment to new patterns of life and roles such as spouse, parent and bread winner.

7. Middle Age (40 years to retirement)

-Transition age when adjustments to initial physical and mental decline are experienced.

8. Old Age (Retirement to death)

-Retirement age when increasingly rapid physical and mental decline are experienced.

Robert J. Havighurst elaborated on the the Developmental Tasks Theory most systematic and extensive
manner continuous throughout the entire lifespan, occurring His main assertion in the is that
development is in stages, where the individual to the next resolution of problems or performance of
developmental tasks.

- Development occurs in stages throughout life

- Individuals progress by resolving problems or completing tasks typical to their culture

- Success brings satisfaction and societal approval

- Failure leads to unhappiness and difficulty with future tasks

- Individuals are portrayed as active learners engaging with their social environment

- Influenced by biological, psychological, and sociological factors at each stage

THE DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS:

Infancy and Early Childhood (0-5)

-Learning to walk
-Learning to take solid foods

-Learning to talk

-Learning to control the

-Elimination of body wastes

-Learning sex differences and sexual modesty

-Acquiring concepts and language to describe social and physical reality

-Readiness for reading

-Learning to distinguish right from wrong and developing a conscience

Middle Childhood (6-12)

-Learning physical skills necessary for ordinary games

-Building a wholesome attitude toward oneself

-Learning to get along with age-mates

-Learning an appropriate sex role

-Developing fundamental skills in reading, writing, and calculating

-Developing conceptsnecessary for everyday living

-Developing conscience, morality, and a scale of values

-Achieving personal independence

-Developing acceptable attitudes toward society

Adolescence (13-18)

-Achieving mature relations with both sexes

-Achieving a masculineor feminine social role Accepting one's physique

-Preparing for marriage and family life

-Preparing for an economic career

-Acquiring values and an ethical system to guide behavior

-Desiring and achieving socially responsibility behavior

Early Adulthood (19-30)

-Selecting a mate

-Learning to live with a partner

-Starting a family

-Rearing children

-Managing a home

-Starting an occupation

-Assuming responsibility civic responsibility

Middle Adulthood (30-60)

-Helping teenage children to become happy and responsible adults

-Satisfactory career achievement

-Achieving adult social and civic responsibility

-Developing adult leisure time activities

-Relating to one's spouse as a person

-Accepting the physiological changes of middle age

-Adjusting to aging parent

Later Maturity (61-)

-Adjusting to retirement and reduced income

-Adjusting to death of spouse

Establishing relations with one's own age group

-Meeting social and civic obligations

-Establishing satisfactory living quarters

THE PASSAGE TO ADULTHOOD: CHALLENGES OF LATE ADOLESCENCE

Physical Development:

-Most girls have completed the physical changes related to puberty by age 15.

-Boys are still maturing and gaining strength, muscle mass, and height and are completing the
development of sexual traits.

Emotional Development:

-May stress over school and test scores.

-Is self-involved (may have high expectations and low self-concept).

-Seeks privacy and time alone.

-Is concerned about physical and sexual attractiveness.

-May complain that parents prevent him or her from doing things independently.

-Starts to want both physical and emotional intimacy in relationships.

-The experience of intimate partnerships

Social Development:

-Shifts in relationship with parents and subordination to one that reflects the adolescent's increasing
maturity and responsibilities family and the community.
-Is more and more aware of social behaviors of friends

-Seeks friends that share the same values, and interests.

-Friends become more important.

-Starts to have more intellectual interests -Explores romantic and sexual behaviors with others.

-May be influenced by peers to trehavior behaviors (alcohol, tobacco, sex).

Mental Development:

-Becomes better able to set goals and think in terms of the future.

-Has a better understanding of complex problems and issues.

- Starts to develop moral ideals and to select role models.

Encouragement is the key ingredient for improving your relationships with others. It is the single most
important skill necessary for getting along with others so important that the lack of it could be
considered the primary cause of conflict and misbehavior. Encouragement develops a person's
psychological hardiness and social interest. Encouragement is the lifeblood of a relationship.

Encouragement is not a new idea. Its spiritual connotation dates back to the Bible in Hebrews 3:11
which states "Encourage one another daily." Encouragement, as a psychological idea, was developed by
psychiatrist Alfred Adler in the early 20th century and continued to evolve through the work of Adler's
follower Rudolph Dreikurs. However, even today, relatively few educators, parents, psychologists,
leaders or couples have utilized this valuable concept. Most of the time, people mistakenly use a
technique like praise in an effort to "encourage" others.

Half the job of encouragement lies in avoiding discouraging words and actions. When children or adults
misbehave, it is usually because they are discouraged. Instead of building them up, we tear them down;
instead of recognizing their efforts and improvements, we point out mistakes; instead of allowing them
to belong through shared decision-making and meaningful contributions, we isolate and label them.
Most of us are skilled discouragers. We have learned how to bribe, reward and, when that fails, to
punish, criticize, nag, threaten, interrogate and emotionally withdraw. We do this as an attempt to
control those we love, bolstered by the mistaken belief that we are responsible for the behavior of
everyone around us, especially our spouses and children. These attempts to control behavior create
atmospheres of tension and conflict in many houses.