for you i'd bleed myself dry

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/34413064.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Categories: F/M, M/M
Fandom: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Katelyn/Aaron Minyard, Aaron Minyard
& Andrew Minyard, Neil Josten & Aaron Minyard
Characters: Neil Josten, Aaron Minyard, Andrew Minyard, Nicky Hemmick, Katelyn
(All For The Game), Kevin Day, Matt Boyd, Allison Reynolds, Renee
Walker (All For The Game), David Wymack, Betsy Dobson, Danielle
"Dan" Wilds
Additional Tags: Neil Josten & Aaron Minyard Friendship, im so sorry about this, Angst,
Hurt, Trauma, Kidnapping, Violence, Rape/Non-con Elements, this
really hurt my heart, Hurt Neil Josten, he needs therapy so bad, Hurt
Aaron Minyard, Andrew Minyard Has Feelings, addresses nicky
assaulting neil, why does nobody ever address that in canon?, fuck it! i'll
do it myself, non-edited, Not Beta Read, trigger warning, seriously, No
major character deaths though, i hate major character deaths
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2021-10-10 Completed: 2024-01-21 Words: 33,198 Chapters:
15/15
 for you i'd bleed myself dry
by jcstcns

Summary

After their latest Exy game, Neil gets kidnapped alongside Aaron while trying to protect him.
The two suffer from hell and back together, and an unlikely bond forms as a result.

Andrew Minyard has never been good with feelings or with wanting, but he would be lying if
he said he wasn't scared to lose his family and that he didn't want them back.

Notes

Hey everyone! This is my first public aftg fic on my new account, and I wanted to warn that
it isn’t by any means going to be perfectly in-character or completely accurate; however, I
still hold this fic close to my heart and hope you all will as well. I’m typically more of an
angst writer so don’t come to my account expecting really happy and fluffy stories all the
time. Although, I will disclaim that I dislike major character deaths with a passion, so I will
not be writing those. Trigger warnings in this piece specifically for violence, kidnapping,
rape/non-con, and blood.

All credit goes to Nora Sakavic for the characters and universe. Do not steal or copy this
work to another site.
 Chapter 1
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

It had been a bad day for Andrew. Despite his own issues and struggles to even get out of
bed, he had somehow managed to scrounge up enough energy to participate in the second
half of the Foxes’ game against the Ravens.

Neil had a sneaking suspicion that Andrew’s involvement in the game today had only been to
ensure that the Ravens had lost. It had been only one year without Riko Moriyama, and yet
some of the players at the nest still harbored hatred and blame towards Neil.

Andrew did his best to shut down the goal without promises, deals, or even exchanged words,
but Neil knew that Andrew didn’t do anything he didn’t want to do. In fact, he could almost
hear Andrew’s voice correcting him that Andrew didn’t want anything at all.

Because it was a bad day for Andrew, Neil hadn’t even questioned his reluctance to go into
the locker rooms while the rest of the team was inside despite the stalls separating each
player.

A simple look into Andrew’s eyes had told him that today Andrew wasn’t wanting even Neil
to come close, so Neil had showered at the same time as the others and waited outside the
door for Andrew to finish up on his own.

All of the other players had already made their way to their respective cars excluding Aaron,
who was standing on the other side of the exit, likely waiting for Kaitlyn to finish up so the
pair could head back together.

Neil did his best not to look in his direction considering the rocky relationship between the
two. Despite his best efforts to mind his own business, Neil could not ignore the years of
intuition that he had gained while on the run from his father.

His eyes narrowed as he scanned the twin’s surroundings, his feet carrying him closer to
Aaron ignoring the exhaustion that dragged him down.

Aaron looked up to face Neil as he got closer, but the scowl on his face quickly faded out into
nothing. Aaron’s eyes slid closed causing Neil to sprint forward in order to catch him before
his lifeless body hit the cement.

Hands full with Aaron’s limp body, Neil had struggled to fight off the two attackers that had
quickly found themselves approaching. One of the two slid out from behind Aaron’s body
holding an empty syringe while the other had rounded the corner and made his presence
known.

Neil swung out his left fist to keep the attackers back but was ultimately blindsided by the
unknown presence of a man approaching from behind him. Neil found himself frustrated with
his lack of awareness of his surroundings for only a moment before a small prick in the back
of his neck left his limbs feeling too heavy to support.

He did his best to shield Aaron’s body on the way down and could only briefly make out the
pain of slamming into the cement before everything faded away completely.

--

Neil’s limbs screamed out at him before he had time to notice anything else. At the familiar
feeling of pain, a panicked feeling emerged suddenly as did the memories of what had
happened to him.

There was a small layer of crust coating his eyes when he tried to peel them open for the first
time, but Neil was able to force them open anyways.

The room he was being held in was cold and decorated with just enough light to make out
another hunched figure sitting opposite him in a chair. The blonde hair stood out brightly
compared to the dull colors in the room.

Neil glared at Aaron’s body to see if the other would make eye contact, but after a few
moments with nothing but the occasional rise and fall of his chest, Neil realized that he must
still be passed out.

Finally looking down to inspect himself, Neil focused on the restraints securing him to his
chair. He shifted his weight in the chair and used the momentum in an attempt to break
through the knotted rope but couldn’t help the frustrated grunt that escaped at the realization
that he was too firmly secured to just brute force his way out.

Neil allowed his chair to stop rocking and decided to sit still and assess the situation as best
as possible. He turned his head as far to each side as it could reach in order to fully examine
the room he was being held in. Out of the entire room, Neil was only able to find one exit,
which was positioned behind Aaron’s unconscious body.

Neil was in the middle of surveying the room for any potential vents or holes in the wall
when Aaron gasped awake from beside him and thrashed in his chair.

Neil’s eyes met his panicked expression quickly, but before he had the time to warn him to
stay quiet, Aaron thrashed against his restraints again and screamed out for help.

Aaron had only a few seconds to even consider screaming again before the door burst open
behind him. In any other situation, Neil might have found it amusing how quickly Aaron
whipped his head to try to see the door behind him. Neil imagined that if Kevin were here,
there would be some comment about how Aaron never reacts that quickly for Exy.

Three figures stepped forward into the room and shut the door behind them. The shorter of
the three, the syringe man from the initial attack, pulled on a hanging string between Aaron
and Neil and effectively turned on a light above them.
Both Neil and Aaron found themselves wincing at the sudden brightness despite their best
efforts. It had taken a moment for his vision to readjust, but Neil’s eyes were focused on the
three men as soon as he could open them again.

“I have to admit, Andrew. It was hard to find you again after everything, but we did some
searching online after Drake was murdered and eventually realized you had found yourself in
the spotlight.”

Neil’s mind worked quickly to catch up with what was being said. These guys thought they
had Andrew? How did they know Andrew? What had they known about Drake?

One glance at Aaron revealed his apparent struggle to put the pieces together himself.
Luckily for them both, syringe man was stupid enough to explain.

“What is it Andrew… you don’t remember us? I know Drake didn’t let us take turns often,
but I thought you would at least remember your foster brother’s best friends.”

“Those ropes sure do feel familiar Andrew, don’t they? Steven learned how to do several
different kinds of knots since we’ve last seen you. We wanted things to be even more
memorable for you this time around. Although, I’m sure that won’t be a problem considering
your little friend here. Did you get yourself a boyfriend Doe? I always knew you were into
it.”

The stronger looking man, Steven - according to the syringe guy, stepped closer to Aaron and
reached his hand out to cup his cheek. Aaron jerked back in his chair, and it would have
tipped over if it wasn’t for the third guy catching him.

“Just as responsive as ever, huh Andy? I admit we were a little worried about coming for you
after realizing what you had done to Drake, but we couldn’t resist after seeing those pictures
of you online. You’re much bigger now, but I bet you’re held down all the same.”

Neil felt himself becoming increasingly angrier as he noticed the horror on Aaron’s face. He
slammed forward into his chair in an attempt to steal the attention away from Aaron. While
the two had never been close personally, Neil knew that Aaron was important to Andrew. By
default, that meant Aaron was important to Neil as well. Asshole or not, Neil would protect
him with his life.

His plan worked like a charm, and Neil briefly heard a quick “Neil-” from Aaron’s direction
before his own head was smacked to the side. The blow itself hadn’t been too powerful. After
all, Neil had grown up with people far stronger and crueler than Steven, syringe guy, and
their third companion.

A sick smile found its way to Neil’s lips and somewhere deep inside of his head, a voice
whispered to him that the Butcher would be proud.

“Oh, well isn’t this fascinating…” syringe boy teased, tapping his finger lightly against his
chin.
“Neil, was it?” He said while grabbing a fistful of Neil’s hair and yanking it until he was
looking into the man’s eye. “I think this might end up being more interesting than even I
could predict.”

The three men all glanced at each other briefly before leaving the room, Steven pulling Aaron
down into a forceful kiss before he closed the door behind him.

Both Aaron and Neil sat quietly for a moment as they listened to the sound of three retreating
pairs of footsteps from outside the door. Neil kept his eyes closed in focus until he couldn’t
hear anything anymore. Aaron must have had a similar idea because they both spoke at the
same time.

“Are you okay-” Neil began while Aaron scowled out a short “You didn’t have to do that.”

Neil scrunched up his face, not entirely catching onto the conversation. This seemed to
irritate Aaron even more than before because he rolled his eyes in Neil’s direction.

Aaron leaned forward in his chair despite not being able to go anywhere.”You don’t need to
protect me, Josten. I saw what you did by making noise. You don’t owe me anything.” His
words were hard, but Neil could sense the relief in his tone.

“I know I don’t owe you anything,” Neil repeated the same phrase back, “neither does
Andrew. I still won’t sit back and let something bad happen to you.”

A glimpse of surprise graced Aaron’s features before he disguised it with a quick scowl.
“Andrew was right… you are a martyr.”

The comment was as much of a thank you as Neil assumed he would receive, so he nodded
his head to signal he got the message before letting the conversation drop. Aaron could be
seen chewing aggressively at his lips from across the space, and Neil could only hope that
rescue would come soon.

--

Neil wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but not much had changed since their arrival.
Aaron had suggested a while ago that some time must have gone by because he was starting
to feel hungry and exhausted.

In turn, Neil suggested that the two took turns sleeping in case something significant were to
happen with the three from before.

It had seemed like the group was following some sort of schedule. Justin, which Neil had
learned was the name of syringe guy, had come in occasionally with a bottle of water and had
only given any to Aaron or Neil if they allowed him to force it into their mouths with a kiss.

So far neither of the boys had accepted the proposal, but Justin didn’t seem to mind. He
stated he was glad to wait them out until they were begging for it, and then he made some
remark about how much he had missed Andrew’s pleading and begging, which had led to
Neil lashing out and kicking him in the back of the leg.
This action had earned Neil some alone time with Steven, who so far had mostly come inside
to punish Neil when he said or did something that needed punishment. Neil took all the
beatings quietly and continued to act out in order to distract the three from approaching
Aaron.

Neither Neil nor Aaron had picked up on goon three’s name, but they mutually decided to
give him the nickname dickhead because Neil thought it was funny and fitting. After the past
few hours (?), days (?) that they had suffered through, Neil thought the least he deserved was
a little bit of fun.

--

It had taken them a while to get released from the chairs, but eventually Steven, Justin, and
Dickhead had shown up with a knife and cut their restraints. In another world, Neil would
have thought about using the time to escape, but he and Aaron were outnumbered, severely
exhausted, and unhealthy from not properly eating or sleeping.

Dickhead seemed to be the least intense of the three, and Neil filed that information in the
back of his head for later. He never knew when an opportunity to escape would arise, but he
knew enough from his life that he knew it might not come again.

Neil must have dozed off while sitting down because a soft touch to his head startled him
awake. Aaron flinched back just in time to avoid Neil’s swinging arm.

“Sorry,” Neil grumbled after a few seconds, “I must have fallen asleep.” Aaron nodded his
head in response and slowly lifted his arm towards Neil’s head again, making sure his
intentions wouldn’t catch the man by surprise.

Neil hid the grimace from his face when Aaron’s fingers softly poked at the wound on his
forehead.

Neil had a hard time keeping track of what earned him which injuries, but he definitely
remembered that one being a result of spitting the water shoved down his throat back into the
face of Justin.

He hated to admit it, but Neil couldn’t help but see Nicky in the man. Flashes of Neil’s first
night at Eden’s rang back in his mind causing Neil to feel more discomfort for his friend than
ever before.

At least Justin had been so caught up in his rage that he forgot to take the rest of the water
bottle from the room, providing Aaron and himself with their first real tastes of water since
they had arrived.

--

It had been quiet for a while, so Neil and Aaron had passed the time however they could. It
started off slightly awkward between the pair, but after tending to so many of Neil’s wounds
that Aaron knew were because of him, the two formed something resembling a mutual
understanding and bordering the lines of friendship.
Neil personally thought he would never see the day where he didn’t mind Aaron’s company,
but considering the circumstances, neither of them seemed to care about their previous hatred
anymore.

Neil kicked out his foot in an attempt to keep his legs awake. At this movement, Aaron
turned to face him from where he was sitting on the cold floor beside him.

Neil’s throat was dry, but one glance at the water bottle showed that they had reached their
last drink. Neil picked up the bottle and handed it over to Aaron, ignoring his shocked
expression.

Aaron looked down at the bottle in his hands with a grimace. He didn’t want to take the last
drink after Neil had been the one to suffer while getting it for them.

“I didn’t give it to you to stare at,” Neil’s voice rang out, pulling Aaron from his internal
debate. Aaron rolled his eyes and opened the cap before slowly sipping the last of the water.

His voice sounded more defeated than he liked when Aaron spoke, “Have you been thinking
about them? How they’re doing. If they’ve even noticed that we were missing?”

Neil stayed quiet for only a moment before responding. “They noticed. You know they did.”

Aaron nodded his head, feeling more sure of it now that Neil had confirmed it too. “I can’t
stop thinking about Andrew…” he admitted. “Everything they’re saying and trying to do. He
was only a child.”

Aaron assumed the silence meant the end of their conversation, so he was surprised to hear
Neil speak again a few moments later.

“I can’t stop thinking of Nicky.” Neil admits, hating the way the truth startles even him. He
kicked himself even more for the burst of honesty even more when Aaron’s head snapped
over to meet his eyes. Confusion was written all over the twin’s face, and Neil figured he
might as well continue now anyways.

“He kissed me that first night at Eden’s. I hate thinking about him that way, but every time
Justin comes in with that water bottle, all I see is Nicky. All I can feel is his tongue shoving
that cracker dust down my throat.”

There was a time before when Aaron would have defended Nicky. There was a time before
when he wouldn’t have cared how Neil felt. Now, he couldn’t help but feel guilty for the
events he didn’t even realize had occurred. Now, he couldn’t help but remember how
invading Steven’s lips were on his that very first day.

“He shouldn’t have done that,” was all Aaron said in response. It was a brief comment, but
the words seemed to echo throughout the room for hours.

--

A door slamming nearby set off all of Neil’s panic bells. Something was wrong. He took a
quick look at Aaron’s sleeping figure and positioned his body in front of him as a shield.
Aaron jumped awake when their door had been slammed open as well. Steven stood in the
doorway, and his crazed eyes locked with Neil’s for a brief second before he looked behind
him at Aaron’s defensive posture.

HIs lips quirked upwards taking in Aaron’s expression, and Neil knew right then that
something bad had happened. Had they finally discovered that they had Aaron instead of
Andrew? Had they gone back to Palmetto and hurt one of the Foxes?

Justin stood behind Steven, holding the door open for him. Neil could see the hallway behind
their food for the first time, and he counted two different doors that were connected to it.

“We’re done waiting, Andy. Get up or I will drag you out myself. I know you missed us too.
You don’t have to pretend.”

Neil had dealt with a lot of trauma in his life, but for once he was mostly out of his element.
He didn’t know what to do. Despite this, all it took was Aaron sucking in a nervous breath
behind him to motivate Neil.

“Fuck off Steven.” Neil’s voice came out sharp. It was like a flip had switched and suddenly
two pairs of eyes locked onto Neil as if finally realizing his presence.

Good. If they were focused on him, then they would leave Aaron alone. Neil could hopefully
provoke another beating if he chose his words carefully enough.

“Like anyone would be desperate enough to miss you or enjoy your company. Tell me, do
you ever get tired of having to force your way with other people? Does it even bother you
that nobody can stand being close to you unless it’s against their will? It must be tiring being
so fucking useless, unwanted, and unmemorable.”

Neil could hear Aaron squeak out something behind him, but he kept his focus on Steven. His
eyes were darker now than Neil had ever seen them. His fists were clenched so tightly by his
sides that they were almost completely white. This was going to hurt.

Steven stormed forwards toward Neil and Aaron’s bodies pressed closely on the floor. Steven
grabbed the front of Neil’s shirt and went to yank him off the floor, but Aaron held tightly on
the back of his shirt.

When Neil was pulled upwards, his shirt tore open. Neil knew that he was short, but even he
was thrown off by Steven lifting him up with one arm and reaching his foot under Neil’s legs
to kick Aaron.

Aaron grunted and flinched back into the wall, cradling the side of his face. Neil shifted in
Steven’s grip, trying to turn back and make sure that Aaron was okay.

He was sure that Steven would have continued his assault on Aaron if it wasn’t for Neil’s
shirt ripping further causing his body to slip some from Steven’s grasp.

Steven barely had enough time to catch Neil before he slid down to the floor. He had dropped
the small part of Neil’s shirt that had ripped off and grabbed him by his hair just in time.
Neil couldn’t help but scream out as his hair was yanked, and his arms scrambled up to claw
at Steven’s hands.

Steven let go of Neil’s hair and instead grabbed him by the throat. Before Neil even had time
to react, he was slammed backwards into the wall.

A strangled noise could be heard leaving his throat, but Steven’s hand around his throat kept
it from being too loud. When Neil lifted his arms again, his shirt slid down his shoulder some
due to the fabric being so ripped and stretched.

The air felt cold on his shoulder and seemed to sting where his scars were exposed. One of
Steven’s arms pulled back as if to punch Neil in the face while his other held tightly at Neil’s
throat.

His eyes began feeling heavy as it got harder to breathe, but Neil kept them firmly locked
onto Steven’s defiantly.

It all seemed to happen in slow motion. Steven’s arm pulling back further, Aaron screaming
out from below them, and then a voice coming from the hall outside.

“Stop,” Justin called out firmly. Steven’s hand froze where it was in the air causing Neil to
quirk an eyebrow at him. The hand around his neck loosened just enough so that he could
finally suck in a breath, and Neil was so distracted by this fact that he didn’t see as Steven’s
eyes roamed over his raised skin in appreciation.

“Bring him,” Justin ordered, “he will be fun to break.”

--

It had taken a while for Aaron’s vision to stop spinning after being kicked in the head, but
when it finally did, the absence of a fiery redhead was apparent almost immediately.

Aaron swiped a hand under his nose and cursed when blood smeared onto his fingers.
Despite his pain and difficulty breathing, he spit out a clump of blood from his mouth and
shakily made his way to his feet, grabbing the wall for support.

Aaron knew that he was currently stronger than Neil, which did nothing to calm his nerves.
Neil had been giving him much more of the food and water than he had taken for himself,
and he allowed Aaron longer rests to sleep.

If Aaron was in such bad shape after being prioritized, then he didn’t even want to imagine
how Neil must be holding up.

Aaron stumbled towards the wall he had last seen Neil on and picked up a torn piece of fabric
from his ripped shirt. The fabric felt like fire in his hands, but Aaron only held on tighter.
Why wasn’t he strong enough to protect Neil how he had been protecting him?

His thoughts had been cut off by echoes of screams that must have been coming from the
other room. Aaron pressed his ear against the wall and flinched back when he heard fighting
on the other side.
Neil, his mind provided. A reminder of the last words he remembered hearing ran throughout
his head like a warning, and Aaron dropped the fabric that he had been clinging to like it
burned him.

“Move your hand. I want to hear him scream.” The words came from the other side. The
walls must have been thin because Aaron could hear every movement and noise from the
other side, including a hand moving from Neil’s mouth and the small “fuck you” that came as
a response.

His ears started ringing again when he heard another scream, and Aaron sunk down to the
floor once again.

He cupped his hands over his ears tightly to try to muffle the sounds, but this only worked for
a few minutes before he was shocked out of it by a bloodcurdling scream on the other side.

“Say it!” A voice demanded from the other side. Aaron couldn’t tell if it had been Justin or
Steven speaking, but the fear burst through his chest regardless.

“Get off of me-” Neil croaked, his voice dying out from screaming so loud. Aaron didn’t
know when it had happened, but he found himself pressed closely to the wall again.

“Say it!” The voice from before screamed once again. A loud slapping noise followed and
Aaron flinched back from the wall like he had been hit.

“I can’t,” Neil’s voice whimpered. “I won’t say it. He doesn’t like that word. I won’t say it.”
He repeated, his voice sounding more broken and defeated than Aaron had ever wanted to
hear.

Aaron pushed himself as far from the wall as possible, not wanting to hear anything else. He
cupped his hands over his ears once again and began rocking back and forth in an effort to
block out the crying and screaming from the other room.

--

When the door opened and Neil’s body had been thrown onto the floor before him, Aaron’s
face had gone paler than he thought humanly possible.

Neil wanted to laugh. He wanted to make fun of Aaron. He wanted to reassure him. He
wanted to do anything.

He couldn’t.

Neil’s eyes looked up towards the door he had been thrown in from. Steven and Justin stood
side by side looking down at him. Neil away from them, knowing he wouldn’t like the look
in their eyes.

When he saw the two pairs of feet step into the room and walk past his crumpled frame, Neil
forced himself to sit upwards. Behind him, Aaron pushed himself as far into the wall as he
could reach.
The look on his face was one of a haunted man, and Neil couldn’t help but recognize the fear
in his eyes as the same one that Neil had seen in Andrew’s all those months ago. The same
one he bet had been in his no longer than an hour ago.

Neil forced a dry laugh out of his throat. Both heads turned to look at Neil once again.
Neither of the two had been able to contain their shock at Neil’s sudden participation.

“Give up already,” Neil spoke. His voice was raspy and quiet, but everyone in the room clung
to the words he spoke like they were the first they’d ever heard.

“You won’t touch him. You won’t break him.” Neil hoped Aaron read into these words and
heard the honesty behind them. “You won’t break him just like you didn’t break me. Do you
remember what I said earlier, Steven? I was right about it. You really are unmemorable.”

Steven sped towards where Neil was half-sitting, half-laying on the floor and crouched down
in front of him. Neil braced himself for the pain, but he couldn’t help but panic when he
noticed that Justin still stood over Aaron’s body.

Steven ran his hand down Neil’s bare stomach and lightly touched at a bruised piece of skin
right above his waistline. Neil flinched back at the feeling, remembering how Steven’s mouth
had occupied the same space not even an hour earlier.

Steven leaned in close and layed a kiss on the side of his neck before tilting his head up to
Neil’s ear. “Your mouth says one thing,” he teased, “but your body says another.”

Neil squeezed his eyes shut at the words and the truth that even he couldn’t manage to bury
with lies. He felt Steven back off of him slightly but didn’t dare open his eyes quite yet.

Of course, Neil hadn’t exactly accounted for Aaron screaming out his name in warning and
shocking him out of his mind. As if Aaron’s scream wasn’t startling enough, the first sight
upon opening his eyes was that of a knife plunging towards his abdomen.

Neil didn’t as much feel the pain of the knife as he did remember it. Suddenly, he was 8 years
old again and locked in his father’s basement with Lola while she scolded him about not
being strong enough or accurate enough when fighting.

Neil shoved the memories out of his head and blinked back into reality. His eyes moved
slowly to track Steven as he retreated and watched as he shuffled over towards Aaron once
again.

His distraction didn’t work. Neil hadn’t been able to save him. If something were to happen
to Aaron now after everything that Andrew had sacrificed to keep him safe, Neil didn’t know
that he would ever be able to look at either of the twins again.

“Stop,” he cried out. Neil shoved the pain as far away as he could. “Don’t touch him. Leave
him alone. I’ll do anything just-” Neil cut himself off and looked up into Justin’s eyes.

“ Please . Don’t hurt him.”

Justin froze where he was standing and then broke out into a grin. “I knew you would be
pretty when you begged,” he stated.

Neil hadn’t even known what he would be sacrificing when he said it, but as Steven turned
his back on Aaron once again, Neil knew that whatever it was, it would be worth it.

Steven’s walk over to Neil had been slower than he could imagine as he sat in anticipation of
what would happen to him. Neil held his arms to his abdomen where the knife still stuck out
of him in a painful, awkward fashion.

Neil ignored the steady drips of blood and instead locked eyes with Aaron. Neil nodded his
head slightly and forced his face to form a small smile, hoping to convey that it was alright.
Aaron shook his head in response and paused for a moment seemingly making a decision.

Neil let himself be pulled up by Steven. His hands were rough and hot where they grabbed
his hips, but Neil wasn’t sure he could stand on his own anyways.

Justin, too, began turning away from Aaron and heading towards the door Neil was being led
out of when Aaron kicked out his foot and tripped him up similarly to how Neil had done
what had seemed like ages ago. Neil could sense, then, what was going to happen next as
Steven began turning their bodies back to facing Aaron.

It took one brief glance at Aaron’s body thrown over Justin and trying to slam his head into
the ground for Neil to make up his mind about his options.

With his right arm, Neil ripped the knife out of his abdomen and slit Steven’s throat in one
quick move.

Without anyone to support his weight, Neil slid down to the floor with him as Steven’s body
hit the ground.

Neil knew he had killed Steven. He knew this the same way he knew that he would begin
bleeding out faster. He knew these things because Neil knew knives, and Neil knew pain.

He knew exactly how hard he had to throw the bloodied knife that was still gripped tightly in
his hand in order for it to reach Justin. He knew exactly where to throw this knife in order to
take him out as quickly as possible.

He knew the second the life had drained from Justin's eyes, and he knew that he wouldn’t
have long before his own eyes followed suit. Neil knew these things as well as he knew
Andrew and as well as he had known himself.

With a choked breath and the rest of his strength, Neil shoved Steven’s lifeless body off of his
own and pushed down hard on his wound, ignoring the burning pain as he did so.

“Neil-” Aaron’s voice called out from the other side of the room. “Neil, fuck! What did you
do-”
 As Neil’s eyes were slowly closing, he couldn’t help but wonder about the third guy. Where
had the third guy gone? Neil hadn’t seen him all day?

Neil tried to warn Aaron, but he could only manage a cough instead. When Neil finally
allowed himself to succumb into his pain, he could only hope that Aaron had somehow
remembered too.

Chapter End Notes

This chapter broke my heart into a million pieces, so I hope my writing did it justice. I
know that canonically Aaron and Neil aren’t on very good terms, but lately I’ve found
myself more and more intrigued by their dynamic and mournful of their lack of a
relationship. Anyways, I decided to write it myself because Aaron and Neil friendship is
so personal to me <3 This fic isn't completely finished yet, but I'm super excited to
continue writing and already have so many ideas about the next chapter.
 Chapter 2
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Aaron had gone into shock. This much was apparent by the foggy feeling in his mind and the
little medical knowledge he could remember off of the top of his head.

Part of him had remembered the feeling of Justin’s body slumping down and out of his grasp
as Neil’s knife made contact with his neck. Part of him remembered the warmth of his blood
as it sprayed across Aaron’s face and into his mouth. Part of him remembered the feeling of
Neil’s weakening pulse under his fingertips. Part of him remembered hearing the voice of the
9-1-1 operator calling out to him from the other side of the phone that Aaron had pried from
Justin’s cold and unmoving body.

Aaron did not remember how it felt to talk.

There was no way of telling how much time had passed from when the police and medics had
arrived at the building Neil and Aaron had spent their last week trapped in or from when the
pair had arrived at the hospital.

Neil was immediately rushed into the emergency room and out of Aaron’s sight. Aaron
vaguely remembered the nurse in front of him asking for his name and for Neil’s name, but
Aaron had only stared back at her in response.

The people had moved around him and checked him into a room of his own. Aaron wanted to
ask about Neil or to scream out for someone to find Andrew, but he couldn’t bring himself to
talk.

Aaron looked down at the blood still clinging to his fingernails. No matter how much the
nurses had tried to clean his face and hands of the blood, it still burned into his skin anyways.
Aaron felt that no amount of cleaning could ever make the red stain go away.

He watched as his fingers moved and stretched out one by one, not even raising his eyes to
the women standing in front of him talking.

“Definitely has a concussion-” Aaron stretched his fingers far apart and wiggled them. “I
don’t know. He hasn’t said anything since he got here-” Aaron flipped his palm over so that it
was facing him. “I think we need to call in a psychologist. I know Tam is out right now, but I
have a friend from college-” Aaron squeezed his hands together into a ball and watched as
the skin turned white.

His hands started shaking at the memory of Steven and his anger. Aaron squeezed his fist
tighter. He could feel the skin on his palm split open from the pressure. A nurse reached
towards him to grab his hands, and all Aaron could see was Steven and Justin.

He slammed backwards into the bed and lashed out in front of him. A beeping noise beside
him grew increasingly louder, but he didn’t take his eyes off the entrance to his room as
several more people rushed inside.

“Calm him down!” Someone shouted from beside him. “I don’t know what happened, he just
started freaking out.” The nurse in front of him panicked.

“Push the drugs. We need to calm him down before he hurts himself any more.”

Drugs? No. Aaron didn’t want drugs again. He tried to reach his arm up and grab the nurse in
front of him, but it felt heavy and disconnected.
He pushed himself further up in his bed and reached out again, his arm swinging out of
control as it went. A cold piece of metal pressed itself into his wrists, and Aaron flinched
back as it clicked against the side of his bed, locking him in place.

His panic only lasted a few seconds before his vision faded away once again and his body fell
backwards into the bed. Aaron was really beginning to hate the feeling of that.

--

“I don’t know. He came in with another boy all bloody and in shock. I haven’t been able to
get a single word out of him, and his friend is still unconscious and recovering from his
operation. Right now they’re both recorded as John Doe. His medication should be wearing
off any second now. I was hoping you might be able to reach him. It is obvious these two
have suffered some sort of trauma. The other one had countless bruises, wounds, scars, and
signs pointing to sexual assault. Something really bad must have happened in that building.”

Aaron blinked his eyes open slowly, trying his best not to wince at the bright light. He moved
his hand to scratch at the itch on his head, but was met by a harsh pull on his wrists that
limited his movement.

The clang from the handcuffs must have gotten the attention of the two people quietly
conversing outside of his room. “Sir,” a soft voice began.

“I have my companion here. She is a psychologist, and we are hoping she might be able to
help you some. I’m going to pull back the curtain so we can see you, so try not to panic at the
sudden movement. I promise we won’t hurt you.”

Aaron froze up at the words but allowed himself to sink back into his bed once again. His
eyes tracked the movement from the other side of the curtain and eagerly followed the fabric
as it pulled back to reveal two women.

The nurse from before and…. Betsy?

Betsy was unable to hide her shock at Aaron’s appearance and shoved her hand over her
mouth to contain a gasp.

“Oh my god, Aaron.” Betsy cried out. She reached forwards towards his bed and then paused
as if considering her movements. Relief flooded through Aaron at the sight of a familiar face,
and his name acted as a bucket of cold water being poured over his head.
Aaron. His name was Aaron Minyard. He came here with Neil Josten after they saved
themselves from their kidnappers. He had been missing for roughly a week, he was
concussed and in shock, his hands were bloody, but even then, he was relieved at Betsy’s soft
smile.

Betsy allowed her tears to finally flow out when Aaron released a shaky breath. “Aaron, let
me get these handcuffs off of you, okay? I won’t touch you without your permission, I
promise. These restraints were just the doctors trying to keep you from hurting yourself. You
were pretty out of it from what I’ve heard. Is that okay with you, if I take them off?”

Her voice was stable and loving, and Aaron clung to every word she said greedily. Things
were going to be okay now. He wasn’t in danger anymore. Neil wasn’t in danger anymore.
They were safe with Betsy.

Betsy was careful to wait for Aaron’s nod of approval before moving towards him with the
keys. As much as it pained her to see Aaron like this, she needed to be careful with her words
and actions. After hearing the little bit that she had, Betsy wasn’t sure what Aaron had been
through the past week, so she would treat him with as much kindness as possible and make
sure he knows that he has a choice in what happened to him.

If Betsy noticed Aaron’s small flinch at the release of the handcuffs, she didn’t comment on
it. Instead, she offered Aaron another kind smile and willed the tears out of her eyes.

Betsy turned to the nurse in the room, who was currently standing off to the side with a
confused expression.

“Forgive me,” Betsy apologized, “I actually know this man. His name is Aaron Minyard, and
he is one of my patients at Palmetto State. He and another companion have been missing for
well over a week. Aaron isn’t a threat to anyone here. He is a good kid.”

The nurse nodded at Betsy’s words and spared Aaron one more glance before excusing
herself from the room with a promise to come back later.

“Aaron, is it okay if I call Andrew and let him know that you’re here? He has been really
affected by your disappearance, and I know it would be good for all of the Foxes to know
you’re okay. I’m sure Katelyn would want to see you too.”

Aaron couldn’t help the sob that broke free at the reminder of his family. For the first time in
several days, Aaron nodded with the feeling of hope in his chest and let his tears flow.

Betsy left him with a box of tissues and stepped to the other side of the room to call Andrew,
who she trusted enough to spread the word of Aaron’s current location.

After a few moments of trying to collect himself, Aaron took a small sip from the water
bottle next to his bed and pushed away the memory of Justin shoving water down Neil’s
throat against his will.

“Aaron,” Betsy’s voice cut in, “do you want to talk to me some about what happened? I know
it’s going to be hard to talk about, but it is something that the police will need to know about
eventually. It’s perfectly okay if you want some time to yourself first. If that’s the case just let
me know, and I’ll tell those cops to give you a while. If not, I’d be happy to read you all the
questions that they’ve written down and record our conversation.”

Aaron peered at Betsy from over his water and met her gaze with hesitance. Betsy’s blind
courage, support, and loyalty gripped at him like a warm hug encouraging Aaron to set the
water back beside him and speak his first words since the escape.

“I think I would like to tell you about it.”

--

It had taken about 3 hours for Aaron to go over nearly everything with Betsy, leaving out
small parts and pieces when it was too much. Betsy encouraged him the whole way through
with kind words and small gestures to show that she was listening.

Aaron had stumbled his way through the events even though it was hard to even think about,
utilizing Betsy’s gentleness and familiarity to get him through it. Once Aaron was done
telling Betsy as much as he could, he found himself reaching out to her and pulling her into a
hug without even thinking.

At Betsy’s shocked reaction, Aaron immediately pulled back, kicking himself for not being
more considerate of other people’s space especially after what he and Neil had just suffered
through.

“I’m sorry,” Aaron apologized, letting out a bitter laugh. “I didn’t mean to grab you like that.
I know it’s unprofessional and-”

His words were cut off by Betsy pulling him back into her body and wrapping her arms
around him. Betsy held on tight, and Aaron allowed himself to be held. He allowed himself
to feel hurt and allowed himself to let his guard down.

His body melted into Betsy’s embrace, and Aaron let himself feel the differences between her
warm touch and Steven’s harsh one. He let himself breath out and release all of the fear and
hurt from this past week.

Betsy had eventually pulled back with an apology at the sound of her phone ringing and
pressed the phone up to her ear.

“I can come get you in a minute Andrew, I just need to make sure that Aaron is okay with
seeing everyone first.”

Aaron’s head snapped up at the mention of Andrew and suddenly the panicked feeling from
earlier had started crawling its way back up. As if Besty could suspect this, she sent a small
nod towards Aaron before continuing on with her conversation.

“I understand that Andrew, and I appreciate you trusting me with that honesty; however, right
now I will not compromise Aaron’s trust or wants for your benefit. I cannot allow myself to
do that no matter the circumstances. I will talk to him quickly and come see you as soon as
we are done.”

Betsy laughed at whatever response Andrew gave her and then simply ended the call and shut
her phone.

“Yes.” Aaron had admitted before Betsy even had the chance to ask the question. “Yes. I
want to see Andrew. Yes I want to see Katelyn. I want to see everyone. I need-”

Betsy grabbed Aaron’s hand in hers to stop the shaking and nodded her head at him before
getting up from her seat and moving to leave the room.

Aaron gripped tighter at her hand, effectively stopping her in her tracks, and then released her
hand at the realization of what he did.

A thousand words swam through Aaron’s head at once: an apology, a dismissal, an

admission, the truth. Aaron settled on the last one before giving himself any time to talk him
out of it and spoke.

“Can you stay?” he whispered, his voice feeling tinier than it had since the two started
talking. “I’m okay if they come see me, but I just-” Aaron stumbled over his words for a
second, “I don’t want to be alone right now.”

Without even a second of hesitation, Betsy moved to sit back down beside Aaron and took
her hand into his once again. She pressed a small button beside his bed to call in a nurse and
explained to her where to find Andrew and the others in order to guide them to Aaron’s room.

Aaron and Betsy sat quietly while they waited, but Betsy’s firm grip in his hand helped to
squash all of the doubt and worry that Aaron faced about finally seeing his family again.

--

Andrew’s entrance into the room had startled Aaron as soon as he slammed his way inside.
Aaron flinched as the door bounced off the wall, but a small hand shot out to catch the door
before it had the chance to bounce back closed again.

Aaron sat completely still at the sight of his twin. Bags and dark circles hung heavy under
Andrew’s eyes indicating that sleep hadn’t come easy to him either lately. Andrew’s
eyebrows were furrowed causing Aaron to realize for the first time in forever that Andrew
must have been worried about him being missing.

Andrew’s body blocked the other figures still standing in the door, but Aaron found that he
didn’t mind.

“What happened?” Andrew’s voice questioned. Aaron tried not to focus on the small crack in
his voice that pushed forward as Andrew had spoken and instead looked to Betsy for help,
knowing he couldn’t possibly explain everything again on his own.

Andrew’s eyes followed Aaron’s as they shifted in the psychologist's direction. Andrew
leveled a glare in Betsy’s direction, but she didn’t react to his anger and instead spoke out
with a calm voice.

“Why don’t you make room for the others to come in, Andrew. I’m not sure Aaron would be
comfortable explaining these past events individually each time. It would likely be easier for
everyone if it was just explained once.”

Andrew looked conflicted at Betsy’s words but stepped further into the room allowing Nicky,
Katelyn, and Kevin to finally follow him in. Aaron tried to keep himself from getting choked
up again at the sight of his family.

Katelyn, upon seeing Aaron for the first time, cried out at his appearance. Aaron could feel
the bruise on his head and the blood on his skin more now than ever as he twisted himself
further into the bed to hide the extent of his injuries.

A small huff could be heard from the other side of the room at this behavior, but Aaron
ignored it and instead released Betsy’s hand to grab ahold of Katelyn’s. Andrew took the
other seat beside Aaron’s bed with Betsy standing behind his chair and Nicky and Kevin
standing slightly further to the right.

Aaron let himself be calmed by the feeling of Katelyn’s nails softly tracing over the skin on
his hand as Betsy vaguely told the group of people within the room what had happened.

This time around, Betsy left out all non-essential details so that Aaron and Neil could decide
themselves what exactly they told the others and who they even decided to tell.

Betsy simply repeated the information Aaron had told her about how Aaron and Neil were
kidnapped and eventually working her way up to who exactly had kidnapped them. Not once
had Betsy mentioned what happened during the week even though Aaron knew she was
aware of almost everything.

As soon as the names Steven and Justin were announced, Andrew went rigid. Betsy stopped
talking and instead turned to look at him directly when she spoke.

“There was another person there with them, but neither Aaron nor Neil were able to figure
out his name.” Betsy spoke out carefully and slowly.

None of the others reacted for a moment, all looking around at each other trying to figure out
what those names meant and why they were significant enough to earn a pause in the story.

Andrew jumped up from his chair and searched between Aaron and Betsy’s expressions
trying to figure something out. “Tell me you’re lying.” Andrew demanded, his voice stern
and strong like he was willing it not to be true.

Betsy shook her head softly in response and reached her hand out towards Andrew’s
shoulder, giving him enough time to refuse her touch.

Andrew nearly tripped backwards over his chair trying to avoid the hand, so Betsy retracted it
without a word and instead faced the others with an explanation on her tongue.
“I don’t understand-” Katelyn shook her head. “Who are those people? Did you know them
Aaron?”

Aaron shook his head in response, not letting his eyes leave his brother’s panicked frame.
Andrew was frozen in place and so tense that Aaron wondered what he was thinking. Aaron
didn’t offer up any further explanation, knowing this wasn’t one of his secrets to spill.

“They were Drake’s friends,” Andrew admitted after a moment. The words cut through the
room and seemed to suck all of the air out along with it.

Everyone around the room looked to Andrew for more information, but he didn’t offer
anything further, instead choosing to let the dread suffocate him. Gears turned in everyone’s
heads as they pieced together what this new information meant. Drake’s name meant that
Andrew was involved. Drake’s name changed the meaning of the kidnapping. Drake had a
reputation for how he had hurt people.

Katelyn’s head whipped suddenly from Andrew’s face back to Aaron’s and she opened her
mouth to say something before choosing to close it again.

A loud bang broke up the sudden wave of silence causing nearly everyone in the room to
jump. Aaron looked over towards the sound where he now saw Andrew cradling his hand
close to him, the skin red from punching the table beside him.

Betsy’s calm voice once again worked to release tension from the room. “Katelyn, Kevin,
why don’t you two come with me to go update the others? I’m sure they would love to see
you both and hear about Aaron since they aren’t all allowed inside right now.”

Kevin scurried out of the room without a word. Betsy placed her arm on Katelyn’s now
shaking form and escorted her out of the room as well.

As soon as the door shut behind them, Aaron spoke. It was the first time either Andrew or
Nicky had heard his voice since the game, and the sound immediately caught their attention.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Aaron spoke definitively, leaving no room for doubt.

It was important to Aaron that Andrew knew that he wasn’t to blame. “It wasn’t your fault
back then, and it isn’t your fault now.” His voice was confident and firm as he continued,
“Andrew, you cannot control what other people do to me the same way you cannot control
what they did to you. Nobody blames you for this, especially not me.”

Andrew seemed surprised by Aaron’s admission and immediately asked his question now
that the other prying ears were gone.

“Did they?” Andrew began, choosing his words carefully as he continued. “Did they do to
you what they did to me?”

Aaron looked into Andrew’s eyes at all of the emotion and shook his head. The tension from
before seeped from his shoulders, and Andrew slipped back into the chair once again.
Nicky crawled from his spot further away closer to Aaron and sobbed quietly in relief or in
pain, Aaron didn’t know.

“Neil didn’t let them hurt me.” Aaron offered, solidifying his previous response verbally this
time. He needed to make sure there wasn’t any room for confusion and that Andrew knew the
truth.

“I won’t lie and say they didn’t hurt me, Andrew. But it wasn’t like that at all. The closest it
ever got was a forceful kiss on the first day. Nobody touched me after that, not that way.”

Andrew sucked in a breath at the admission and snarled out a small “Steven?” which Aaron
only confirmed with a shrug. The fact that Andrew knew exactly who was responsible based
on what he was told made Aaron’s chest feel heavy. His brother hadn’t deserved this. Nobody
did.

Aaron pushed the hurt feeling away and repeated it once more out loud just to be sure
Andrew truly heard him. “He only kissed me once. Nobody touched me like that... They
didn’t assault me or anything. I promise.”

Andrew scoffed at Aaron’s words, and his hands fiddled with the edge of his armbands.
Aaron wasn’t sure if he was tracing his knives or scars, but he didn’t care anyways. Andrew
wasn’t a threat to him. Aaron realized now that Andrew never had been despite Aaron’s
previous assumptions.

Nicky sobbed out in response to Aaron’s words, reminding Aaron of his presence once again.
“It doesn’t matter that they didn’t do more,” Nicky said in between cries, “they kissed you
without your consent or permission. That is assault, whether you realize it or not.”

Aaron waited for Andrew to correct Nicky and tell him to stop being so dramatic, but when
he made no move to speak, Aaron swallowed the lump in his throat.

Before he had a chance to respond, Nicky cried out once more and jumped into Aaron’s arms
before either Aaron or Andrew had realized what was happening. “I’m so sorry that this all
happened to you Aaron. You didn’t deserve any of this-”

Aaron was surprised to find it was his arms that cut off Nicky’s speech by shoving him
instead of Andrew’s. A bitter feeling erupted in Aaron’s chest and before he had the chance to
think things through, he exploded.

“Oh, would you fuck off Nicky” he yelled, pushing his body back again. “Of course nobody
deserves to be assaulted. Don’t come crying to me about how you’re sorry knowing you did
the same fucking thing to Neil when you shoved that cracker dust down his throat with your
tongue. Spare me your guilt and get the fuck out of here.”

Aaron’s anger had consumed him. No longer caring about letting someone else’s secret slip.
Nicky’s hypocrisy had been the final blow that caused him to explode, but in reality Aaron
was finally starting to feel the pain and fear again. What he really needed was to see Neil.
 Andrew’s glare burned a hole through the door where Nicky had just run out crying. On any
other day, Andrew would have immediately ran after him and demanded answers, but today
he just turned his head back towards his twin and forced the distaste from his face.

“I’ll send your girlfriend in,” Andrew said, shocking Aaron.

Aaron opened his mouth to thank Andrew but was interrupted by Andrew scowling a small
“shut up” in his direction before nodding his head and walking over to the door, not leaving
Aaron alone until Katelyn had walked into the room to take his place.

He watched through the window of his room as Andrew walked away, pulling Bee from
where she was talking to Wymack in the hall. Andrew had only said one word to her before
walking in a different direction, but Betsy followed urgently without even dismissing herself
to Wymack.

Katelyn’s sigh pulled his attention from the emptied hallway and instead over to his
girlfriend.

For the second time today, Aaron let himself break down as he pulled Katelyn onto the bed
beside him and tucked himself into her shoulder. Katelyn cried softly as well, clutching
Aaron’s body as close to hers as possible. She held him as he cried for about half an hour and
continued holding him until he eventually fell asleep.

It wasn’t until his breathing finally evened out that Katelyn allowed herself to truly break.
She had gone days without the most important person in her life, and the only person who
truly understood her pain was the same person who, up until this week, Katelyn thought
hated her guts.

When the nurse walked back in later to inform Aaron that Neil would be awake soon and saw
the couple both sleeping with tear stained faces, she only smiled at them before closing the
door once again and letting herself out.

Chapter End Notes

I struggled a little with writing this chapter because there was so much I wanted to get
done, and I wasn't sure how to pace everything, but I'm content with how it turned out
and hope you all are too. It's a bit ooc, but that was unavoidable considering how the
books didn't let Andrew feel often and didn't quite show how Aaron would respond to
trauma. I hope y'all don't mind much considering the whole idea about Aaron and Neil
being friends is ooc anyways though.

Chapter 3 definitely won't be getting released as quickly because I do not have most of it
planned out in my head like with this one, but I will work to get some stuff done
whenever I have time! Once again, kudos and comments are appreciated if you're
enjoying the story.
 Chapter 3
Chapter Notes

So sorry for the delay y'all... I really have nothing good to say as an excuse, but as I
warned chapter updates are not always going to be super quick, so I hope that's okay. As
if that wasn't bad enough, this chapter is *especially* unedited. I literally didn't even re-
read this to make sure there weren't any spelling errors or anything haha.

Also, if you haven't noticed, this chapter is pretty fucking short. I was debating a lot on
how to separate these upcoming events and figured it would be better to split it into
multiple chapters as opposed to making everyone wait a super long time because I still
don't know how to handle the next step of this story.

As always, I hope you enjoy! Comments and Kudos are both greatly appreciated and
very inspiring if anyone is interested O-O Constructive criticism and kind words
only!!!!! Hate is not tolerated <3

When Neil awoke, there were three things that he was painfully aware of.

Neil was aware of the familiar bandaging that usually followed a stab wound located on his
abdomen, a foreign yet uncomfortable feeling in his lower back, and the crushing panic in his
chest upon realization that he didn’t remember what happened after he passed out.

It took all of three seconds for Neil to scan the room he was in and come up empty. There
was nobody present with him in the room, not doctors, not police, and not companions. A
quick look around signaled that the curtains were drawn shut beside his bed keeping him
from seeing through the windows surrounding him.

Quietly and meticulously, Neil lifted himself into a sitting position on the bed, ignoring the
wave of nausea and exhaustion that pulled at him forcefully as if trying to keep him pinned
down.

Neil scrambled, then, to sit up as quickly as possible, struggling with the sudden thoughts that
crowded his mind. The reminder of hands and lips on his body ignoring all his screams and
shouts of protest washed over him like a plague.

Before Neil had time to even process what was happening, he leaned over his bedside railing
and threw up whatever had managed to remain in his stomach from his time locked up with
Aaron. His eyes were still watering when he was pulled back into reality by the sound of a
door slamming open.

A tall man stood frozen in the doorway, and Neil did his best to size him up by puffing out
his chest in what he could hope was a threatening manner. He wasn’t sure that the
intimidation was very effective considering that there was still remains of watery bile running
down his shirt, but the man only offered Neil a sad smile before backing up and walking out
the door.

He wasn’t sure what about the interaction had set him off, but Neil found himself suddenly
feeling incredibly nauseous again.

Neil didn’t have much time to deliberate over his shaky state of mind before the door was
opened once again. This time, Neil was shocked to see the familiar face that walked through
the door.

Betsy stood waiting in the doorway with another small woman standing behind her with
scrubs, but she made no movement to enter the room despite the nurse standing behind her
with a bucket in hand and a scowl on her face.

Neil took in the scowl for a quick moment, before flashing one of his own back, debating on
making himself throw up once again just to make the nurse’s life harder.

Rather than putting his plan into action, Neil let the exhaustion overtake him momentarily
and sunk back into his sitting position on the bed, allowing the familiar face of Betsy to
subdue him just enough to withhold any fight he might have had still in him.

Neil wasn’t sure what the first words out of Betsy’s mouth might be, but he was relieved for
once that the therapist could somehow pick his brain enough to know what he needed to hear
when Betsy spoke.

“Aaron’s okay,” she stated simply, not bothering to fill in all the missing details about what
had happened in case Neil wasn’t quite ready to hear them. Neil narrowed his eyes at the
woman, searching for something in her expression to indicate a lie, but he came up empty
and settled for nodding his head in response.

Neil watched as the older woman stood still in the doorway, focusing on her unchanging
expression as she stared him down. Ignoring the pull of her eyes, Neil found himself studying
the worry lines above her eyebrows instead.

Before, Neil had seen Betsy as nothing more than a therapist who was plotting to expose his
deepest secrets and fears or who would finally reveal that he couldn’t keep the Foxes and that
staying at Palmetto was too dangerous for those she cared about.

Now, Neil couldn’t recognize anything on her face that indicated a threat. All he could see
was the subtle crease between her eyebrows, unrecognizable to anyone else that hadn’t grown
up depending on reading other people’s expressions to survive; the tiredness in her eyes that
stemmed from more than old age; and the unwavering realization that one day Betsy, too,
would be gone from his life.

Neil felt, then, all of the burden from his life: the loss of his mother, the loss of his childhood,
and the inevitable loss of Andrew once he realized that Neil hadn’t been able to protect
Aaron like he should have.
Neil huffed out a ragged breath of hot air. Realistically, he knew that Betsy hadn’t been able
to see or feel his shaking hands from their position in his lap, but he sensed her years of
experience with traumatized individuals had acted as warning enough for his incoming
breakdown.

Her hesitation was so brief, Neil had practically missed it between the blurriness gathering in
his eyes. The sensation of the tears stung as they travelled down his face, curving around the
already marred skin as they fell down.

Betsy rushed around the end of his bed, moving quickly to stand beside him in the area not
littered with puke. A hand was held out silently in offering, but Neil only shook his head at
the sight. He didn’t deserve that kind of comfort or support.

Betsy dropped her hand immediately, and Neil was so busy forcefully wiping the tears from
his eyes that he missed the sincere frown that momentarily overtook the woman’s features.

“I’m sorry,” Neil tried to laugh. The noise came out sounding more like a bitter sob than
anything. Neil ignored this fact the same way he ignored the true meaning behind his words.

“I didn’t mean to start-” Neil froze, not even sure how to address the foreign reaction from
moments before. Without even being able to continue on with his apology, Betsy’s steady
voice had cut him off.

“It isn’t your fault, Neil,” she stated simply. Neil was baffled at her ability to sound so
genuine. “It’s normal to have strong reactions after experiencing a trauma,” Betsy explained
further. “You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for.”

Neil’s body gave in at the words. Overrun by a sudden multitude of emotions, Neil shot out a
small protest at the words trying to settle on an appropriate response.

“Fuck you,” he spit out instead. The only two people who reacted to this outburst were Neil
himself and the nurse on the other side of his bed, who was currently tasked with mopping up
his mess from moments before.

Betsy didn’t offer any kind of indication of hurt or anger at Neil, which only fueled the
previous nauseous feeling once again. Why isn’t anyone yelling at him or upset with him?
Neil didn’t understand, he couldn’t. Aaron was hurt because Neil wasn’t strong or smart
enough to protect him.

“I understand you don’t mean that Neil, so don’t worry about hurting my feelings. Aaron has
told me some of what happened while you were still being treated, and I cannot begin to
imagine how you feel right now.”

“I understand your anger and frustration with the situation and possibly even yourself if I am
reading into things properly; however, I need you to know that nobody is mad or angry with
you for being hurt. You did a lot of brave things in that building, Neil, but you aren’t in
danger anymore, so you’re allowed to stop fighting now.”
The shaking of his head came immediately as a response. Neil didn’t even register he was
doing it until he glanced up and met Betsy’s curious eyes. Knowing that she wasn’t one to
push unless given direction or an implication that it was allowed, Neil decided to take the
first leap in the conversation.

“I couldn’t protect him.” The words felt like rubber in his mouth, and Neil hated the aftertaste
that the truth held now more than ever.

Betsy reached her hand out again, and this time, Neil leaned slightly into it. Her hand was
warm against his shoulder, but the touch wasn’t overbearing or forceful like Neil worried it
might be.

It had been quiet for a few moments when Betsy’s voice cut through the silence in the room.

“You weren’t the reason that Aaron got hurt. Nobody is to blame for his injuries except for
the people who did this to you two. It isn’t your responsibility to protect anybody except for
yourself, honey. I know that Aaron and probably several other people are grateful for what
you did, but I hope you realize that nobody was expecting you to do those things. I know that
you’re very strong and very brave, Neil, but you aren’t the cause for every bad thing in the
world, and you don’t have to take all of the burden yourself.”

Neil let the words ingrain themselves in his mind. The idea of prioritizing himself even a
little felt foreign to him, and the pain in his body and chest were still apparent, but in this
moment Neil could feel the storm slowly working to dissolve.

This time, Neil nodded at the words from the therapist. The pair sat in silence for a while up
until Neil became aware of the tug of his eyelids attempting to slam close in exhaustion. With
Betsy’s previous words in his mind and his hand still tightly gripped in hers despite
everything, Neil allowed himself the momentary peace that came with utter sleep deprivation
and the neglect of one’s health.

Unaware of the careful yet sharp, scrutinizing stares from the now open hallway door, Neil
fell into rest.
 Chapter 4
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

This time, when Neil woke, he wasn’t met with an empty room.

The small body of the sleeping therapist resting in the chair beside him caused a panicked
feeling to arise in Neil’s chest for only a few moments before his mind caught up with the
fact that she was there when he had fallen asleep.

What Neil hadn’t noticed was a shorter body wedged awkwardly between the door and a
table in his hospital room.

Andrew kicked his foot into the door quietly, making just enough noise to notify Neil of his
presence without risking waking up the sleeping Bee. Neil’s head whipped over to the noise,
and Andrew watched as his eyes went from alert, to relieved, and then confused.

“You’ve been hogging my shrink, Josten.” Andrew said blankly.

To anyone else, the words were safe from exposing any information about Andrew’s current
state of mind. Andrew knew, however, that Neil wasn’t just anyone else, no matter how hard
he tried to deny that fact.

Andrew’s comment peeled back every metaphorical piece of armor he was shielding himself
with and cautiously revealed how hard it truly had been for him with both Neil and his
brother missing for a week.

Somewhere deep in Neil’s head, he picked up on the hidden truth that Andrew had offered.
He realized the double meaning behind Andrew’s words signifying that something was
wrong enough with Andrew that he needed someone else’s support. Perhaps if he was in his
right mind, Neil would have been able to easily pick up on the unsaid ‘I was worried about
you,’ but a tight feeling in his chest distracted him enough to keep him from making the
connection.

Neil pushed away the sick feeling in his gut at finally seeing Andrew again and tried his
hardest to focus on Andrew’s words rather than the memory of what Steven and Justin had
whispered about him in Neil’s ear.

Andrew narrowed his eyes in Neil’s direction when he noticed the smallest shake of Neil’s
head. It wasn’t an obvious action, and it was only made more difficult to spot by the
countless bruises littering Neil’s face; however, Andrew was able to catch it anyways when
Neil flinched away from the empty space beside him for the second time.

“Junkie,” Andrew tested, looking over to see if Bee had awoken yet as he spoke, not quite
liking the look in Neil’s eyes.
The therapist remained seated in her chair, eyes still shut and mouth opened slightly as she
breathed out rhythmically.

With careful movements, Andrew lifted himself from his position and slowly walked over
towards Neil’s bed.

Neil didn’t raise his eyes to track Andrew’s movements or react in a manner that would
suggest he was aware of anything at the moment. A heavy lump made its way into Andrew’s
throat, and the once unfamiliar feeling of worry bombarded him yet again.

His feet carried him softly over to where Neil was sitting, eyes glossed over and staring out
into space. Andrew pulled his hand up gently in front of Neil’s face and waved in front of his
eyes while calling out his name. When that didn’t earn him a reaction, Andrew moved closer
and instead raised his hand next to Neil’s head and snapped in his ear. Still, Neil’s face
remained blank.

Despite his lack of response, Neil subconsciously leaned closer towards Andrew’s body,
seemingly reacting to the familiar and comforting scent he had grown accustomed to.

While Andrew hadn’t initially been close enough to touch Neil, the small movement was just
enough to cause their arms to brush, and Andrew’s quick-acting brain had caught up a
moment too late when Neil snapped out of his trance and lashed out at Andrew, catching his
eye as he desperately swung out in an attack.

Andrew staggered back in shock at the blossoming pain he felt at the tip of his eyebrow
where Neil had targeted all of his strength. His body smacked into the empty chair beside Bee
as he struggled to regain his balance, surprised that he had let his guard down enough that he
was left defenseless to an attack.

Neil snapped back into reality instantly at the feeling of pain erupting throughout his body.
The quick movement from before now rendering his body useless as a result of exerting his
already weak frame.

Betsy awoke suddenly at the sound of something crashing beside her and was immediately
met with the blank, one-eyed stare of Andrew Minyard, his other eye covered by one of his
hands.

Betsy took a second to wake up properly before she remembered the setting and quickly
straightened herself up. Neil was pushing as far back into the bed as possible and attempting
to hide a wince from his features. A few steps back from the bed, Andrew was cradling his
eye and staring directly at Neil, who was avoiding his gaze.

Betsy huffed out in disappointment at the realization that Andrew had ignored her
instructions to stay out of the room until Neil was awake and had approved of him coming
inside.

“Andrew,” Betsy scolded, gaining both of the boys’ attention. “I told you to wait outside and
let me talk to Neil first before coming to see him. I know you have expressed your feelings
on the topic of the kidnapping, but you should not have disregarded what I said.”
Andrew only shrugged in response to Bee’s words and then pulled his hand from his eye,
removing the comforting heat that it provided. The two events may have seemed unrelated to
anyone else, but Betsy knew Andrew well enough to know that this was his way of punishing
himself for accidentally breaking someone’s boundaries and pushing too far.

Her head dropped down slightly at the revelation, but she didn’t have the time to analyze and
discuss this behavior seeing as there was currently a more pressing matter at hand.
Somewhere deep in her head, Betsy found herself wondering how the world could throw
such cruel monsters at the two boys in the room.

“Neil, is it okay if you could talk to me and explain what just happened? I can have Andrew
leave the room if that would make you more comfortable. Anything you might need, I can do
my best to arrange.”

Neil cleared his throat roughly and looked over to where Andrew stood stiffly before
frowning and returning his gaze to Betsy’s.

“He can stay. I don’t mind.” Neil spoke, his voice sounding rough on Andrew’s ears.

Betsy nodded her head in response and then motioned for Andrew to sit in the chair he was
standing beside. Neil didn’t say anything, but he appreciated the gesture when Andrew
slouched down attempting to get comfortable. He hated to admit it, but the sight of Andrew
just standing and hovering next to his bed put Neil on edge.

It was as if Neil was waiting for the other shoe to drop, he realized with a start. Hating the
path of his thoughts, Neil looked up to meet Betsy’s calculating gaze and avoided any
mentions of Andrew repeating throughout his brain.

Andrew, on the other hand, stared directly towards Neil’s stiff frame almost daring him to
make eye contact.

Before the kidnapping, Neil was the only one not afraid of Andrew and the way he expressed
himself. Now, however, Neil seemed to be avoiding Andrew’s existence as much as possible.
The realization felt tight in Andrew’s throat as he wondered what had changed the Junkie’s
mind.

Somewhere deep inside, Andrew’s inner voice reasoned that it was only a matter of time
before Neil finally realized all the pain and destruction that being close to Andrew would
bring and that, really, he was lucky it lasted this long at all. Andrew did his best to fight the
idea off.

Betsy and Neil both remained quiet for a few seconds, the only sound in the room being the
beeping of the machines Neil was hooked up to.

Eventually, Betsy effectively brought Neil back to the present once again by calling out for
him.

Neil sighed at the sound of his name, not quite liking the way it sounded so suffocated in
emotion. There it was again... the sick feeling in his stomach.
The cup shook in Neil’s hand as he picked it up from the table beside him, but the water
effectively drowned out the crawling heat in his throat anyways.

This time, when Neil spoke there was more of a fire to his voice than before. Andrew
couldn’t let himself be shocked by the quick switch of mood coming from the scarred body
before him. After all, Neil had always been interesting.

Betsy ignored the slight tilt of Andrew’s head as he studied Neil’s expressions and instead
focused on what Neil was saying himself.

“I don’t know what happened,” Neil huffed out, ashamed. “I couldn’t get out of my head I
guess. I got too caught up in my mind and became unaware of my surroundings.” The words
felt practiced and overused. Betsy wondered briefly if this was something Neil had said
before.

Neil paused a moment, scowling at himself before positioning himself up right further and
speaking again. “It won’t happen again.” he reassured, speaking more to himself than to Bee
this time.

Betsy couldn’t help the small squint of her eyes at his confidence. She made sure her voice
was as gentle and understanding as she could manage when Betsy made her move to push for
more information.

“Neil,” she spoke steadily. “I’m not sure if this has been a common theme in your life, but I
want you to know that you don’t need to push your thoughts and struggles away. In fact, I
would rather you learned to embrace them and eventually heal around them. Pushing
everything aside and trying to ignore the problem usually makes things worse when the
build-up eventually becomes too much to handle.”

Neil said nothing at Betsy’s words, but Andrew let out a small grunt at the familiar speech he
had received a number of times himself.

As if the small noise had reminded Neil of his presence once again, Neil’s head snapped over
to meet Andrew’s scrunched up body, which was packed tightly against the plastic hospital
chair that he had fallen into earlier.

Andrew glared back in Neil’s direction, trying his best to ignore the irritation that sprouted
upon seeing the bruised skin resting just beneath Neil’s already scarred cheek or the way that
his fingers seemed to twitch every few seconds despite the rest of his body being still.

Betsy leaned back where she was sitting in her chair, finally giving in to the urge to allow this
explosive exchange to play out despite the knowledge that it could go terribly wrong.
Andrew, as perceptive as ever, noticed her behavior and decided to take it as the closest thing
to an invitation he would receive.

Unlike the others, Andrew’s voice was void of any traceable emotion when he spoke.

“You’re angry,” he mused. The words were only a whisper, but they carried so much further
that they seemed to envelope the room as a whole. Neil huffed out at the realization that as
Andrew spoke, it came out as a statement rather than a question, and his heart skipped a beat
at the terrifying, unfamiliar feeling of being known.

“Yes.” Neil confirmed easily, for once deciding not to hide behind an easy lie. After
everything he had put Andrew through, Neil didn’t want to mess with him anymore.

A moment of silence passed as everyone in the room seemed to take in Neil’s words in their
own way. Neil, of course, knew the truth behind his anger already, but to Andrew, the
confirmation only confused him further.

Betsy pushed back in her chair, bracing herself for the conversation to continue, somehow
already knowing what route things were heading down.

Andrew glared at Neil harder for a moment, seemingly trying to choke the words out of him
with a heavy glare. The silence ticked on as nobody made a move, and Andrew could feel his
fingers starting to twitch, looking for the familiar comfort of his knives.

Andrew knew that questioning Neil again seemed pushy and desperate, which was out of
character for him, but the lack of communication only fueled the suffocating thoughts in his
head that Neil blamed Andrew for whatever had happened to him, so he spoke anyway.

“It isn’t my fault,” Andrew spat out, the fire behind his eyes growing stronger than before.
Betsy knew, then, that if it was anybody except Neil, they would have a knife to their throat
already. She tried not to smile at the realization that opening up like this wasn’t something
Andrew would even consider doing a few years ago.

Neil’s head snapped up suddenly, shooting straight towards Andrew in surprise. The look on
his face was pure astonishment and utter confusion. Andrew squinted his eyes in response
and pressed his lips together.

“Who told you it was your fault?” Neil exclaimed angrily, not yet having caught on to the
obvious misunderstanding and miscommunication that had taken place only moments before.

Andrew didn’t bother responding to Neil’s question and instead examined the fiery
expression on his face and the small scrunch on Neil’s nose. This was the most energy that
Andrew had seen from Neil since the night he had gone missing, and Andrew filed the sight
away immediately, making sure he would never forget the lively expression.

Neil was sitting impatiently, still waiting for Andrew to answer his question despite the fact
that Andrew seemed content as is, when Betsy decided to intervene.

“Neil,” she spoke, with just enough force to catch his attention. “Perhaps there was a
misunderstanding about your anger. It seems to me as though Andrew was under the
impression you were angry with him. After hearing your response, I’m not sure this is true.
Would you mind explaining what you meant when you said you were angry?”

Neil sat up quickly at the information, then flinched as his body vibrated with pain. The
monitor beside him hissed angrily at the movement, so Neil carefully lowered himself back
down.
“Why would I be angry with Andrew? If anything, he would be angry with me,” Neil huffed.
He
fidgeted with his scarred hands for a few seconds as he contemplated revealing more.

As if knowing that Neil still had more to say, Betsy stuck a hand out, silently asking Andrew
to give Betsy a few more seconds.

“Why would Andrew be mad at you?" she questioned, "I wasn’t under the impression that
you did anything wrong.”

Neil shrugged his shoulders and began poking at a large bruise on his arm. Andrew couldn’t
see the bruise from his position, but Betsy could tell there was an angry handprint pressed
into his skin from being grabbed too roughly.

“I guess I don’t know if he is angry or not, but I wouldn’t be upset if he was. I should’ve
done a better job at protecting Aaron. I should have noticed the danger quicker outside… I
should have planned an escape earlier on… I should have killed that guy the second he
touched Aaron… but I was too weak to protect us.”

Despite her best efforts to compose herself, Betsy’s frown was visible at Neil’s words. The
boy in front of her was retreating back into himself again, and Betsy didn’t want Neil to lose
the progress he had worked so hard for since arriving at Palmetto.

Finally deciding he had enough of the words coming from Neil's mouth, Andrew spoke up, “I
don’t know where you got all of that from, but that wasn’t how Aaron remembered it. He told
me that you wouldn’t let anyone hurt him," he said, a hint of annoyance on his tongue.

Betsy reached her hand out to where Neil was still prodding at his bruise and very slowly
lifted the sheet until his arms were mostly covered, and the handprint was out of his sight.

“Neil,” Betsy spoke, “while we all appreciate the sacrifices you made in order to protect
Aaron, I need you to know that you don’t always have to save everyone. I know it can be
hard to prioritize yourself or to allow yourself security and safety,” she continued, flicking
her eyes over to Andrew’s direction briefly, “but you need to take care of yourself too.”

Neil nodded his head at the words, not quite processing them entirely, but still taking some of
the information in.

Betsy went to speak again before being interrupted by a small knock on the door. The noise
immediately caught both Neil and Andrew's attention, putting them on edge; however, it
seemed Betsy had been expecting the interruption, as she only checked her watch and sighed
at the numbers that stared back at her.

"I'm afraid Andrew and I must leave for a while, Neil," Betsy said apologetically. "The nurses
told me they would need to come by and perform some tests on you a while back, but I didn't
realize so much time had passed already. I apologize."

Andrew glared over at Betsy as if daring her to try to make him leave when Neil found his
voice and decided to respond.
 "That's okay..." Neil forced out, glancing between Betsy and Andrew, as the two stared each
other down. "Would you guys mind going to check on Aaron for me? I know he probably
isn't alone, but I would feel better knowing someone I trust is with him," Neil stated calmly.

Andrew hated the way the words made him feel, so he forcefully rolled his eyes to show his
frustration and stomped out of the room, willing his breathing to return to normal as he made
his way towards his brother's room.

Chapter End Notes

... Hey guys

Listen, I want to start this note by apologizing because I am so so beyond sorry for
disappearing for so long! It was never my intention to take this long writing the next
chapter, but I had quite a lot of stuff going on that was unavoidable :(

I ended up getting c*vid and lost my ability to form coherent thoughts for about two
weeks. Obviously, I didn't want to write during that time and end up releasing something
really shitty or confusing, so I planned to wait until I was better and then write and
publish this chapter; however, as seen by the horrifically long wait, that did not happen.

I cannot apologize enough for everything, but I hope nobody is too upset with me. I did
end up writing this chapter decently sized and kind of pretty good quality (i think?) in
my opinion. Although, I will admit that I haven't proof read this chapter in an effort to
finally get it out, so please do not hesitate to let me know if there are any horrible errors
or something.

As always, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated and motivating <3

Much love,
jcstcns / vee.
 Chapter 5
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

When Andrew entered Aaron’s hospital room alongside Bee, he was surprised to see that
Aaron was already sitting up and awake. Last he had heard from the cheerleader, Aaron
passed out after his private inspection with a nurse.
Preparing a glare, Andrew shifted to face Katelyn and question why he hadn’t been informed
of Aaron waking when he noticed that she was snoring softly into an extra pillow in her chair.

The bitterness in his chest faded some as he remembered all the long nights the two had spent
holed up together at Wymacks with Bee and Abby since the kidnapping occurred. Andrew
was sure that if he were to look into a mirror anytime soon, his eye bags would mirror the one
on Katelyn’s face. Understanding her exhaustion better than anybody, Andrew pushed away
his frustration and settled for nodding towards his brother in greeting.

Betsy tried not to analyze the way Aaron was reacting to Katelyn, but she noticed
immediately that he had been pushed as far to the other side of the bed as he could have been
without falling off.

If Andrew noticed this small detail, he did not show it. Instead, Andrew positioned his chair
farther from the cheerleader’s sleeping frame and sat down so quietly that Aaron wouldn’t
have noticed his presence if he wasn’t staring directly at him.

Aaron opened his mouth slightly to speak, then froze as if remembering the other people in
the room. Betsy lifted her cheeks into a smile as Aaron’s gaze slowly shifted over to her.

Aaron paused momentarily before dismissing his earlier comment in favor of switching to
another topic.

“So…” Aaron drawled out, his eyes locked onto the sheets half covering his body as he
avoided risking eye contact with either the therapist or his twin, “how was the cafeteria
food?”

The words fell flat in the room, and even Betsy couldn’t contain her confusion at the
inappropriate and unusual comment.

Andrew quirked an eyebrow at this behavior and shifted closer to Aaron’s bed to study his
hidden expression. Betsy’s eyes darted between the two boys, waiting to see which would
break first before scolding herself for the thought.

Betsy pulled the third chair in the room slightly closer to Aaron’s bed and reached a hand out
to the sheets, gaining his attention. Aaron only offered an annoyed shrug at her questioning
eyes before looking downwards again.
Betsy made sure to sound as harmless as possible when she spoke, “Aaron, I think you had
something else to say just then. It’s alright if you don’t feel comfortable sharing; however,
neither Andrew nor I will judge you for whatever you have to say, especially considering the
upsetting circumstances as of late.”

Aaron straightened himself up where he sat in bed, still pushed to the edge furthest from his
girlfriend’s sleeping frame.

“I would like to see Neil… for myself. The nurses told me he was okay and that he was doing
fine, but-” Aaron gestured his hands around in a circle, struggling to find the words he was
looking for.

Andrew hesitated, not wanting to fall into twin stereotypes, especially in front of his
therapist, who would never let him live it down, but ultimately decided he was tired of seeing
Aaron flail his hands around aimlessly.

“Neil’s never fine.” He stated, finishing Aaron’s delayed sentence. “You can come with us to
see him after he finishes his check up.”

Aaron whipped his head in Andrew’s direction, flinching as his skull began to throb at the
sudden, aggressive movement. Out of the corner of his eye, he could almost imagine Steven’s
boot whipping towards him, his arms occupied with holding Neil up as he struggled in the
firm grasp.

Aaron choked out at the memory and scrambled to grab the water from beside his bed in
order to mend his, now, dry throat.

Betsy carefully handed the bottle to him already opened, somehow understanding that his
hands were too shaky to twist the cap off himself.

Two pairs of eyes followed Aaron’s every movement, one pair soft and understanding, and
the other cold and calculating, pushing to gain any information about the events that had
happened during the past week more than the brief overview he had heard from Betsy.

Aaron didn’t notice their gazes until his mind stopped replaying the way Neil sounded as he
screamed and the way the torn scrap of Neil’s shirt felt in his hands. He wasn’t sure how
much time had passed while his mind had taken him captive, but by now Andrew was
standing in the corner of the room, a furious expression on his face, and Betsy was stroking
his hand softly.

Betsy called out to Aaron, questioning if everything was alright, and even though her voice
still sounded far away and muffled, Aaron nodded his head slowly.

At his approval, Betsy removed her hand from where it laid above his and stood from her
position in her chair. It was at this time that Aaron noticed Katelyn was no longer sleeping
beside him, and he tried not to focus on the relieved feeling that snuck up his chest at the
realization.
 “Neil’s awake.” Andrew stated, his anger still apparent by the daring look in his eye paired
with his defensive posture.

Aaron nodded slowly once again before pulling his sheet back and moving to get off of the
bed.

“Aaron,” Betsy interrupted, holding her hand out in front of his body right at the last second.
Aaron froze immediately at the sudden movement and cowered back slightly from her frame.

Betsy’s hand dropped as soon as she realized his fear, and she stepped back some, making
sure to put some room in between the pair.

It was at this time that Andrew had finally snapped and decided to storm out the room. Aaron
wished with everything in him that he could follow directly behind him and march right into
Neil’s room, but was ultimately still frozen after the sudden movement from seconds before.

“I apologize Aaron,” Betsy frowned. “I shouldn’t have stuck my hand in front of you like
that, it was inconsiderate of me. I didn’t mean to startle you any, but I wanted to ask you
something before we went to see Neil.”

The breath of relief hit instantly as Aaron comprehended that he was still able to visit Neil,
but the pounding in his chest didn’t falter as he was still waiting for the bad news that earned
an interruption at all.

“Your doctor has cleared you to travel to Neil’s room once, but she doesn’t want you
constantly moving around and exerting yourself until your concussion gets better and your
body catches up with both rest and food. Would it be alright with you if you were moved to
the extra bed in Neil’s room, or would you prefer if we kept you stationed in a room alone?”

Almost immediately, Aaron confirmed the change in rooms. This way, Aaron could watch
over and protect Neil the same way that Neil had watched over and protected him during the
kidnapping. Plus, it would do him a lot of good having a break from constantly being around
everyone.

Somehow, Aaron knew that Neil wouldn’t be acting as strange as all of the others. As much
as he loved Katelyn, he didn’t want to have to keep up his appearance for her. Neil had very
clearly seen him at his worst, and he would understand more than anybody why Aaron felt
the way he did.

Betsy grabbed his bag with a small smile and walked beside him as a nurse came to escort the
pair to his new room.

Aaron decided, as they all walked down the hall, that even with good intentions, he didn’t
like the way the nurse’s warm hands felt as he supported his weak frame.

Chapter End Notes

Not sure how I feel about this chapter to be honest....

I know it's pretty short and kind of boring but trauma doesn't always cause the same
reactions, so things are bound to differ chapter to chapter. Also, this chapter is sort of a
filler one to move the timeline along as I just needed to work towards Aaron and Neil
reuniting. This way, the stuff I have planned can actually take place next chapter instead
of being prolonged even further. That being said, sorry but not sorry ?

I hope you all enjoyed nonetheless. ALSO nobody comment if Aaron's room being
switched is inaccurate... I am very clearly not a doctor and do not work in a hospital so
I'm just kind of making stuff up as I go in that sense.

Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated!!! I'd love to hear your thoughts and
reactions. Until next time B)
 Chapter 6
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Aaron’s shoes stuck to the floor as he moved closer and closer to Neil’s room… to his new
room. The nurse guiding him down the hall wasn’t put off by the way Aaron slowed more
and more as they approached. Instead, the nurse only tightened his hold and continued
dragging Aaron along.

Aaron’s head was pounding, now, and he wasn’t sure if it was his concussion or nerves that
inspired the feeling, but he knew that he didn’t like it. The floor was sticky, the lights were
too bright, he could feel the weight of his nightgown as it clung to his skin, and the hands on
his skin felt raw and wrong every time they made contact.

Betsy watched with careful eyes as Aaron grew more and more tense the closer they got to
Neil’s room, trying to focus on the small signs of an incoming breakdown but ultimately
growing overwhelmed by the mixed signals his body was giving off.

One signal she immediately caught onto was the way that Aaron continuously flinched
further away from the nurse helping him along. With a small huff, Betsy pretended to drop
the bag she was carrying, and pushed the guilt away when she noticed the small jump Aaron
tried to hide at the sudden noise.

“Oh my,” she huffed, wiping a hand over her forehead. “I’m sorry boys, it seems my frail, old
arms are struggling a bit with carrying this bag. Perhaps we could switch for a moment
dear?”

Betsy offered the nurse an apologetic smile and watched as his eyes lit up at the possibility of
helping an older woman with something she very clearly couldn’t handle on her own. A
small pat on his arm as the two switched positions was all she offered the nurse, immediately
moving to continue on walking and put some space between Aaron and the nurse, who was
now struggling to grab the bag Betsy had previously been responsible for.

Aaron tuned out the voices of passing nurses as he walked, instead, choosing to focus on the
slow decrease of approaching room numbers.

The last few steps before reaching Neil’s room were quick.

Aaron paused to collect himself briefly before Betsy reached out towards the door. The
handle turned both much too slowly and much too quickly for his liking. Time seemed to
freeze entirely as the door swung the rest of the way open, and Aaron found himself meeting
eye to eye with Neil, whose frame was somehow more bruised and broken than Aaron had
remembered.

Aaron watched as Neil sucked in a sharp breath and immediately raked his eyes over Aaron’s
body to check for injuries. Aaron wanted to move, but found that his feet were stuck to the
floor where he stood as he took in Neil’s condition.

Betsy and the nurse both stood behind Aaron in the doorway while Andrew was stretched out
in the chair located in the corner of the room. Neither Neil nor Aaron paid them any attention,
instead, choosing to focus on each other.

Neil, seemingly content with what he observed, let himself relax at the knowledge that Aaron
hadn’t received any new visible injuries from when he had seen him last.

Aaron, on the other hand, couldn’t begin to feel any sort of relaxation while looking at the
broken man before him. How could Neil be so content at a time like this? Why didn’t Neil
look upset? Wasn’t Neil regretful or angry about what happened to them?

Nobody noticed as Aaron’s mind dragged him back into the building they were held hostage
in and replayed the scene of Neil falling unconscious in his arms, blood pouring out of his
abdomen.

After a few seconds, the scene faded out in his head, and Aaron watched, in real time as Neil
blinked slowly and offered a small tilt of his head in Aaron’s direction.

The sight irked Aaron to no end. He fought to get the feeling of Neil’s blood on his hands out
of his mind. He fought to get the reminder of Neil’s skin running cold out of his mind. He
fought to get the sound of Neil’s breathing getting fainter and fainter out of his mind, but it
wouldn’t go away.

With all of these thoughts racing through his head, it only took one more look into Neil’s eyes
for Aaron to break. Snapping out of his trance, Aaron marched forward and pulled his arms
back before throwing them forward into Neil’s chest, slamming him into the bed and holding
him there.

It was relatively easy to pin Neil considering his extensive injuries and inability to defend
himself. Aaron’s voice felt raw and scratchy as he spoke, “Why would you do something so
stupid? You nearly died, and for what? I had it under control, Neil. I was going to stop him
myself and you-”

Aaron’s grip on the frail boy tightened, and the sound Neil let out at the harsh movement was
one entirely familiar to Aaron after their past week together.

Andrew stood from his chair aggressively, and Betsy could be heard gasping from behind
him, but Aaron had already released his hold, feeling the fight drain out of him.

His body fell slowly, but Neil somehow managed to catch Aaron as he collapsed down
towards the bed. How was Neil always there to save him? Why couldn’t Aaron have saved
Neil?

“I’m so sorry,” Aaron rasped, his breathing starting to catch in his throat and tears starting to
form in his eyes.
The image of Neil started to become blurry as the tears overflowed, but Aaron only pulled
Neil closer and sobbed into his chest, breaking down completely.

Andrew stepped forwards, conflicted, but was ultimately rejected by the shake of Neil’s head
and the frown on his face as he held the sobbing twin in his arms. Andrew tried to push the
tightening out of his chest at the sight, but remained unsuccessful.

He tried not to imagine all that could have happened in one week, especially with monsters
such as Steven and Justin, but he knew better than anybody just how cruel the world could be
to those unable to defend themselves. With these painful thoughts and ideas in mind, Andrew
was guided out of the room by Betsy to allow Aaron and Neil some privacy.

Andrew thinks he has never hated Betsy’s respect or consideration more than he does now.

He didn’t look back as he was pushed out of the room, but Andrew didn’t need to. The sight
of his brother completely losing it in Neil’s shaking hands would be etched into his brain
permanently.

It took a while for Aaron to calm down enough to become aware of his surroundings again,
but he was too exhausted to comment on the two other people missing from the room.

Neil stared down at Aaron awkwardly, not quite sure how to handle someone being this
emotional as he had never experienced it before.

Aaron almost snickered at the lost look on Neil’s face before his eyes caught sight of a dark
hand-shaped bruise located on Neil’s neck, effectively smothering any humor on the spot.

Neil was shocked to hear Aaron speak as the twin pulled himself up from his position beside
him. He was more shocked, however, by Aaron’s words.

“Why did you do it?”

Neil tried to scrape his brain for an adequate answer, but couldn’t find the words. Instead,
Neil attempted to throw out a joke and deflect the seriousness of the situation. “What’s one
more scar?” he quipped, his voice falling flat as if hating the truth behind the words.

Humor had been common among the two while they were being held, but Aaron didn’t react
this time. Neil hesitated briefly before speaking again.

“I just…” Neil paused, struggling to collect his thoughts. “All I’ve ever known is hurt. My
entire life up until coming here has been nothing but fear and loss and hurt. Nobody deserves
to go through that.”

Aaron squinted his eyes, trying to piece together Neil’s admission. “Neil,” Aaron sighed,
“you don’t have to protect me. You don’t owe me anything. Hell, I never would have done
the same for you.”
Aaron expected the words would have some effect, but Neil only shrugged in response. “I
don’t think I could live with myself if someone else got hurt because of me. I brought enough
pain and suffering to the Foxes between my father and the moriyamas. I figured I could make
up for it at least.”

The comment was mostly a lie, and Neil knew that Aaron could sense this, but he sure as hell
wasn’t going to break Andrew’s trust and admit how much Andrew had once sacrificed to
save Aaron from these exact dangers or to expose how deep his feelings for Andrew and the
Foxes ran.

Aaron nodded at the spoken words, acknowledging them, and embraced the unspoken words,
knowing that Neil didn’t owe him any truths. If anything, Aaron felt he was the one indebted
to Neil for all of his protection.

Knowing Neil would beat his ass had he discovered this feeling, Aaron shook the thought
from his head. Neil didn’t protect Aaron to gain power over him. Neil just protected him to
protect him. For Aaron, this was enough.

Andrew sat completely still as he waited in the cafeteria for Neil and his brother to be done
with their alone time.

The hospital was full with doctors, nurses, sick, injured, and grieving family. The whole place
felt suffocating and exposed, and Andrew hated every single second of it.

The cheerleader sat at the table across from him, picking at her salad in silence. Andrew
glared down at her fork as it pushed the lettuce around in circles before it became too much
and he shoved the salad closer to her body so she would actually eat it.

Katelyn startled at the movement before her brain caught up with what had happened. She
offered Andrew a tired smile, then turned back to her food. This time, her fork stabbed into a
piece of lettuce and carried it back up towards her mouth.

Andrew looked away.

It had been quiet for a while as Aaron and Neil both took in each other’s company. Aaron felt
he had been repeating “we are safe now” in his head since their arrival. Neil, on the other
hand, still wasn’t entirely sure of their security, considering the third kidnapper was still
unaccounted for.

Aaron’s sigh broke through the tense mood of the room as he figured that they could no
longer put off the impending conversation.

“I told Betsy most of what happened. She knows about… you know” Aaron confessed,
fidgeting with his hands, ashamed.

Neil nodded his head in understanding. “I assumed as much.”

 A few beats passed before Neil spoke again, shoulders tense, “Andrew doesn’t know.” Neil
stated, an observation rather than a question.

Aaron nodded his head in confirmation, even though he wasn’t being asked. “I told him that
you protected me but nothing else. He knows I was kissed that first day, but I didn’t want to
give anyone information without your input. It doesn’t really feel like my secret to share.”

Even though he tried hiding it, Aaron could see as Neil let out a breath of relief at his words.
Neil tried to shrug it off as disinterest, but it was obvious to Aaron that Neil’s assault was
something he wanted kept hidden.

Aaron didn’t quite understand where Neil was coming from, but he knew it wasn’t his place
to question the decision.

“I won’t say anything about it,” Aaron assured, voice sharp and honest. Neil offered Aaron a
soft pat on the back in return, which was somehow more meaningful than a smile for him,
seeing as touch probably didn’t come easy right now.

“You can talk to Betsy,” Neil offered after a few moments. “Talk to her about any of it. I
don’t mind her knowing everything as long as it helps. I figure we both need to talk to
somebody to get this shit,” Neil gestured to his head, “sorted out.”

Aaron couldn’t help but let out a snort at the realization that Neil Josten was finally admitting
to being mentally fucked up. Neil raised his lips slightly at the noise and pretended not to
notice Katelyn’s face pressed up against the glass on the door, trying to see through the
window before meeting Neil’s eyes and running off.

With one final glance over Aaron’s body to ensure safety, Neil let out a yawn and curled up
into himself, ignoring the loud beeps of protest as he shifted his position causing pain to
spike momentarily.

As if sensing Neil wanted some time to himself, Aaron slid off the side of his bed and instead
walked over to retrieve his bag of items that the nurse had dropped off when Aaron arrived.
A singular message was waiting on his phone screen when he picked it up.

Clicking on the notification from Katelyn, he was met with a picture of Andrew staring,
blank-faced at the camera from the seat across from her in the hall. It was easy for Aaron to
notice the lack of hatred behind his twin’s eyes as he stared in Katelyn’s direction, obviously
aware that she was taking a picture.

Deciding to take a page from Neil’s book, Aaron closed his phone, headed over to his own
bed, and curled up in his blankets, relishing the warmth and comfort that the bed provided. It
was nice to feel safe after so long, Aaron realized.

Chapter End Notes

Hello again !!! As you can see, I wrote another chapter for this fic; however, I'm not
entirely sure how i feel about it. I kind of hate some parts, but at the same time I sort of
like it? Anyways, I hope it isn't completely horrible. You might be able to tell but my
worst enemy at the moment is pacing my stories, so I apologize if things are moving too
quickly or too slowly. On a different note, I would love to hear how you all feel about
this story or this chapter specifically! I value all of your opinions and comments as long
as they are constructive, nice, and considerate. Interactions are both greatly appreciated
and inspiring if you're interested.

ALSO, I have a question for y'all if anyone is willing to answer. Do you guys prefer
reading shorter chapters at more frequent intervals, or would you prefer waiting a bit
longer for lengthier chapters? I have been struggling with this lately and wanted to get
an outside opinion.

Much love,
Vee.
 Chapter 7
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

It had been a few days since Aaron switched to Neil’s room, and so far both Neil and Aaron
were liking it better this way. While the two usually avoided talk of the kidnapping in order
to shield the other, they did, however, make conversation about other topics.

Surprisingly, one of the topics that Neil and Aaron had focused on quite a lot was how Aaron
currently felt different about Katelyn.

One late night when neither of the boys could sleep, too plagued by bad memories, Aaron
confessed that he was currently wary about being around Katelyn after what he had been
through.

The soft yet pained tone of his voice as he spoke about feeling too dirty to be with someone
so pure and good was something that Neil couldn’t have imagined ever hearing from Aaron
until now. Even when the pair were being held against their will and being treated cruelly
everyday, Aaron had never once sounded as defeated as he did then.

Neil tried to reassure Aaron that nobody was perfect and that Katelyn wouldn’t hold it against
him, but the words felt hypocritical knowing that Neil, himself, was struggling with similar
feelings towards Andrew.

It seemed obvious to Aaron that Neil was unsure of how to continue his already
unconventional relationship with Andrew. Before, Aaron had always assumed that the
relationship between the two was purely physical, but seeing how beat up Neil was about
how to continue on with Andrew after everything that happened, Aaron couldn’t help but
wonder how deep those feelings really ran.

Neil, of course, denied the statement when Aaron confronted him. Despite their shared
turmoil and struggles regarding their kidnapping, some things Neil wanted to keep strictly to
himself. It was hard not to share with Aaron after his confessions regarding his relationship
struggles with Katelyn; however, Neil knew that by admitting his true feelings, he would also
be exposing Andrew’s, and he didn’t want to breach his privacy like that even if it might help
better things for Neil.

How exactly would Neil be able to talk about how he was more worried about triggering
Andrew because of his past assaults by confirming that he, himself, had suffered the same
fate? How would Neil be able to explain that if Andrew knew the truth, he would be a living
reminder of all the bad things that happened in Andrew’s life?

By admitting these things to Aaron, Neil would be giving away secrets that weren’t his to
share, so Neil kept his thoughts hidden and pushed his conflicted emotions further inside his
head, willing them to go away.
–

The room was quiet as both Aaron and Neil were allowed time to get ready, each decidedly
ignoring the previous night where they had spent hours talking about anything but what had
happened to them. A nurse had just left their room after evaluating each of the boys and
checking to make sure that their recovery was on track, and the two were currently tasked
with getting ready for their first get-together with all the foxes since the kidnapping had
occurred.

Up until now, Aaron had mostly been visited by Betsy, his brother, and Katelyn. He had
briefly seen Kevin and Nicky that first day, but otherwise, nobody else was granted access to
visit him. Neil, too, had spent his time with Betsy and Andrew, but besides that, he had been
left to rest and recover alone.

Today was both exciting and nerve-wracking for the pair. Neil was in no means recovered
completely, and although his injuries weren’t as extensive as when returning from Baltimore,
he was still visibly banged up. After a few days, Aaron finally admitted to him that despite
being allowed to sleep now, the bags under his eyes still weren’t getting better.

It wasn’t surprising to either of them that sleep hadn’t been coming easy at night. After what
they had suffered through, it would be more of a shock for them to be able to rest. The first
few days upon arriving at the hospital, both of their bodies were far too exhausted to stay
awake, but now that they had caught up on missing hours of sleep some, pure exhaustion
wasn’t enough to keep them unconscious anymore.

With a huff, Aaron scowled out in Neil’s direction, growing exhausted with watching him
struggle to lift his arms to change his shirt. “Stop being so stubborn and let me help you, you
big baby,” Aaron complained, the harsh words not matching up with his obviously concerned
tone.

Aaron’s injuries hadn’t been as extreme. The worst of his problems were regarding his nasty
concussion and lack of food, water, and sleep. Neil, on the other hand, was suffering a
multitude of injuries. Aaron wasn’t quite sure how he had manipulated the nurse into letting
Neil change out without her help, but he couldn’t help but feel his stomach twist at the sight
of Neil’s bruised torso, which was scattered with new handprints and bite marks that filled
the few previously empty spaces on his battered body.

Neil huffed out a breath of hot air, frustrated with his body for not being able to push through
the pain as he once was able to.

Neil could tell that Aaron saw the angry marks on his body. For the first time in his life, Neil
felt a new, shameful pull relating to the marks on his skin. His past scars, earned through
violence, showed his survival and defeat over people such as The Butcher, Lola, Riko, and
anyone else who had hurt him.

It was hard to imagine what these new marks would signify considering Neil didn’t quite feel
like he survived anything this time around.
Ignoring the stinging sensation all over his body, Neil forced his arms up in a quick motion
and slipped his hands through the sleeves of his shirt. Aaron looked away as an angry bruise
flashed into his field of vision and tried not to comment on the way Neil’s whole body
seemed to freeze up at the pain of moving.

The silence as the pair finished getting ready was comfortable in ways that it never had been
before. While both Aaron and Neil were unsure of how this meeting would go, they were
confident that after everything, they still both had and understood each other.

Unity held the boys close despite their physical distance, and their agreement to keep quiet
carried them into the meeting with the Foxes courageously.

As expected, there were a lot of tears upon the initial re-introduction. The only ones in the
room with dry faces were Andrew, Aaron, Katelyn, Wymack, Neil, and Kevin. If Nicky were
there, Aaron was sure that he would be crying too, but the cousin remained outside, choosing
not to show himself. When Neil noticed his absence, he did his best not to focus on it.

Andrew sat in the singular chair between both Neil and Aaron’s bed, and nobody commented
on his choice. Neil noticed, of course, that Andrew’s frame was tense from the second that he
stepped into the door, but Andrew did all he could not to acknowledge Neil’s curious gaze.

It was obvious that all of the Foxes were concerned about Neil and Aaron, but the two boys
continued on like it was just another hang-out, ignoring the steady beeping of the machines
attached to Neil and the distant sounds of shouting and cries of grief from the halls.

It took a while for everyone else to adjust to the way things were going, but each and every
single one of them pushed through their negative emotions and fought to offer Aaron and
Neil the normalcy that they very clearly wanted and needed.

It was a few hours later when it happened.

By then, everyone had managed to slip into a somewhat comfortable mood despite the tense
pull of the atmosphere. Betsy, Abby, and Wymack were all standing off towards the corner
eating a pizza that Allison brought in and watching some trivia game show on the tv. Andrew
and Renee were speaking in a hushed tone, voices quiet enough for Neil or Aaron to listen in
on if they wanted, but secluded enough that nobody else could eavesdrop. Katelyn sat at the
bottom of Aaron’s bed, talking to him about this sweet lady that she met in the gift shop.
Kevin was sitting beside Neil, talking about exy games that Neil missed while he was away,
and the other upperclassmen were sitting back and soaking up the conversation, faces stained
with emotion.

The room quickly grew quiet when a nurse walked in with a clipboard. Andrew, Betsy, and
Abby all leaned forward some, signaling that they were listening, and the rest seemed to
follow suit.
The nurse walked over to Neil’s bed and leaned down to whisper something in his ear. Aaron
could sense Neil’s nerves at the closeness as well as he could sense his own. Aaron pulled
himself up from his sitting position at the lack of space between the two, readying himself to
step in if necessary. Before any interruption was necessary, Neil quickly held up a hand to
dismiss what the nurse was saying, and he backed away.

“It’s okay if they stay here while we do it, I don’t mind them being here,” Neil assured the
nurse. Aaron wondered if Neil truly meant his words, or if he just spoke as quickly as he
could to get some space between him and the nurse again. Either way, he felt himself relax at
the knowledge that Neil wouldn’t be so close to that man.

Neil figured that taking pain medication in front of his teammates wouldn’t really breach his
privacy or expose anything, so he assured the nurse that they were all fine to stay. Neil had
really missed their presence and wasn’t quite ready to give it up yet, even for a couple of
minutes to take his medication.

It’s the first time Neil has had this nurse since arriving here. Apparently his and Aaron’s
regular lady took the day off to take care of her sick daughter. Neil tried not to let his anxiety
get the best of him and reminded himself that this was just a normal man doing his job, but
his panic wouldn’t subside fully.

The Foxes continued to stare as the nurse went to retrieve Neil’s medication, desperate for
any new information or insight about his health that they could get. Neil didn’t seem to mind
the intrusion and instead turned to Kevin to continue their conversation.

The others seemed to take that as a cue to resume whatever they were doing before and
hesitantly took their eyes away from the nurse as he rummaged through his bag for the pills
that Neil would need.

When the nurse seemed to find what he was looking for, he let a large smile take over his
face, clearly proud of himself for finding anything in the disorganized bag before him.
Allison snickered slightly at his expression but quickly swallowed her snarky remark at a
stern look from Wymack.

The nurse dumped Neil a container filled with a couple of differently colored pills into Neil’s
hand and instructed him to take them. Neil glanced between his handful of pills and the
nurse, waiting for something to wash them down with when the nurse finally realized that he
was waiting for something.

“I’m sorry buddy, I have to wait until you take them to leave. It’s not that I don’t believe you
will, I’m just required to make sure” the nurse spoke, fidgeting with his hands.

Andrew snickered as the nurse completely missed the mark. Nobody even glanced in his
direction at the noise. Andrew thought he could see Neil smirk, but the look was wiped from
his face so quickly that it was hard to be sure of.

Neil blinked slowly at the obviously intimidated guy standing before him and cleared his
throat, preparing to swallow the pills dry until he was interrupted.
 The nurse’s head snapped to the side at the sound of a voice from the bed beside him. “Can
he possibly have some water with that?” Aaron requested, his voice slightly shaky from
nerves. Neil offered the twin a small nod as a thank you, understanding that it was hard for
Aaron to speak up given his fear.

“Oh wow,” the nurse chuckled, finally realizing his mistake.

“I’m sorry about that, I completely forgot a cup on the way over. Unfortunately it seems like
you’ve run out of them in here,” he continued, glancing over at the fallen pile of paper cups
from where Aaron and Andrew had a stacking competition earlier, “I can page someone
really quick to bring in one since I’m not allowed to leave you unattended with the
medicine.”

Neil thanked the nurse at the over-explanation, not even bothering to question what was
causing his nerves. The nauseous feeling in Neil’s stomach returned, and he was glad that
soon he would have some water to drown it out with.

Turning his head to the side, Neil opted to continue his exy-related conversation until his
drink arrived, and Kevin quickly hopped back into the discussion as well.

The nurse clicked his walkie-talkie and immediately spoke into the small machine, his words
clear and short, “water to room 303, please.”

The word acted as a vise around Aaron’s neck the second he heard it come out of the nurse’s
mouth. To everyone else, conversation continued flowing as usual, but Aaron couldn’t hide
the full body flinch that took over as he remembered the way that Neil sounded as he
screamed out in protest or the look on Steven’s face following Neil finally giving in and
begging.

It didn’t take a genius for Andrew to pick up on the large jerk from beside him or the way
that the sudden movement startled both himself and Renee. When his head turned to meet his
brother, a pale and shaken man stared back.

Ignoring the twitch in his own body at the word associated with so many memories, Andrew
stood from his chair suddenly, alerting everyone in the room that something was wrong as
Aaron curled into himself, hands shaking, and grabbed the railing of his bed like it was the
only thing keeping him from floating away.

Andrew stepped closer to his brother, watching as he flinched away from the movement and
looked around his body, barely acknowledging him, staring through every obstacle in his way
to reach Neil.

It was then that Andrew followed his panicked gaze to meet the frozen and empty expression
of Neil, staring blankly forward, no sign of being aware of those around him.

Andrew swallowed the bile that was rising in his throat.

Chapter End Notes

OKAY SOOOOO ..... this is a really quick update because I decided to write in class
today instead of studying for exams! I've been feeling especially mentally ill under
recent circumstances lately and boy is it doing wonders for my writing inspiration. I was
so excited to get this chapter out that I did not read over it a single time to check for easy
errors, so please (kindly) let me know if you see anything :)

Also, I just realized last night that I was spelling Katelyn's name wrong this whole time,
so I tried to go through and change some of those. Let me know if you happen to spot
any that I missed though ^-^

As always, hope y'all enjoy woooo :D I've been waiting to get to this part for a while
now. Hope you all love it as much as I do <3
 Chapter 8
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Betsy was the first to move. It wasn’t surprising to anyone else in the room how quickly she
had noticed something was wrong with both Neil and Aaron considering how attentive she
usually was. Andrew’s glare burned into the side of her face as she politely escorted everyone
else out of the room, somehow urging her to move faster so that she could do something.

In all his years and with all of his breakdowns, Andrew had never seen Aaron so distraught.
Katelyn had jumped off the bed to move closer to her boyfriend as soon as the bed started
wobbling from him shaking so hard, but he only backed further away from her.

Andrew was a few seconds away from throwing the girl off the bed for invading Aaron’s
space while he was clearly not okay when she finally realized she was out of her depth and
stepped back from his frame, tears in her eyes.

Andrew didn’t spare her a glance as the cheerleader walked out of the room, sniffling as she
went, clearly aware that she couldn’t be of any help right now.

“Excuse me,” the nurse called out, stepping forwards towards Neil, who was still completely
unresponsive.

Andrew whipped his head in Neil’s direction, overwhelmed with what to do as something
was clearly wrong with two of the most unmistakably important people in his life.

Stepping away from his brother’s bed, Andrew pushed forward towards Neil and stuck his
arm out, effectively stopping the nurse from reaching out for the pills that were, now,
scattered across Neil’s lap.

“Perhaps you should come back later,” Andrew scowled, everything in his voice screaming
out in warning. Even though the words he spoke gave the appearance of a choice, the nurse
glanced nervously between everyone in the room and nodded his head, staggering as he
practically ran out of the door, knowing that it was an order.

It was hard to remember his breathing techniques as everything was happening around him,
but Andrew did everything in him to calm himself down so that Bee wouldn’t be troubled
with one of his breakdowns on top of whatever was happening with Aaron and Neil.

Andrew stumbled through every explanation he could think of that would elicit a response
like this from either of the boys and sucked in a harsh breath at the idea that his brother lied
to him about what happened while they were missing.

Bee, having finally gotten everyone out of the room, scurried back inside, arms held close to
her body as she ran. The therapist took one look at both Aaron and Neil, too caught up in the
intensity of the moment to hide the wince from her features.
Andrew watched with narrowed eyes as she flickered her gaze between both beds before
ultimately making the decision to focus on Aaron first since he was beginning to trash around
more and more, hands clamped so tightly to his ears that the surrounding skin was turning
pink.

Neil was still completely immobile in his bed, and Andrew had to use every bit of control in
his body to keep himself from reaching out. This personal level of stillness from someone as
fidgety as Neil was unsettling in every way.

Andrew turned his head, instead, not able to handle Neil’s lifeless frame anymore. Pushing
away the feelings making their way into his chest, Andrew tried to focus on his brother, who
was now staring up at Betsy with obvious fear in his eyes.

Andrew watched as his brother shook his head rapidly, eyes staring directly into Betsy’s yet
lacking even a hint of recognition. Betsy called out to Aaron, but his hands were held so
tightly against his head that she knew he couldn’t hear her.

Andrew stood silently to the side, trying to regulate his breathing while ignoring the pull he
felt, daring him to look to the other side of the room.

He observed for a few moments as the therapist struggled to get through to his brother
vocally. Every word that left Bee’s mouth was spoken like an apology, and each delivery was
a punch to Andrew’s gut.

Andrew’s hands balled into fists where he stood, watching helplessly as his twin brother
deteriorated before his eyes. In an attempt to release some of the tension in his hand, he
shook out his fist in an aggravated fashion.

Andrew watched with guarded eyes as Aaron’s head whipped to the side at his small
movement. Somehow, the subtle action was the very thing to wake Aaron from his catatonic
state of rocking back and forth.

Betsy stepped closer to Aaron as he slowly peeled his hands from where they covered his
ears, and she reached forwards carefully to grab ahold of them and stop their shaking.

A choked sob broke the quiet throughout the room as Aaron collapsed forwards into Betsy’s
smaller frame. The therapist staggered slightly at the unexpected addition of weight but was
quick to readjust herself and wrap her arms around him.

Aaron let out a small curse, gripped the nasty bruise on his head, and shook the ache from his
head in one quick motion.

Andrew could tell the second that Aaron pushed his pain to the side and readjusted his
appearance so that he looked less shaken up.The realization that Aaron was hiding his
emotions the same way that he did snuck up on Andrew, causing distaste to fill his mouth.

Andrew huffed out a ragged breath and stormed over to the window where he could see
Wymack trying to subtly stare into the room and figure out what was happening. Andrew sent
him the flattest look he could muster up before pulling the curtains shut to create more
privacy.

Neil hadn’t reacted at all as Andrew stepped around his bed and pulled at the curtains, but
Aaron watched every movement of his brother, following Andrew’s body until his gaze
eventually caught on Neil.

As if a flip had been switched, Aaron leapt up from his seated position, causing Bee to
wobble to the side, nearly falling off of the bed.

Under any other circumstance, Andrew would have made some smart remark to tease Bee
about her clumsiness, but he found himself too intrigued by his brother’s strange behavior to
speak up.

A sense of dread washed over Andrew as Aaron approached Neil’s frozen body, and Andrew
filed away this new feeling as something he would need to unpack with Bee once there was
time to deal with his own problems.

Betsy walked over to where Aaron was stopped in front of Neil and stared, a confused
expression taking over her usually composed features. Andrew disregarded her presence and
stared directly into his brother’s eyes, trying to gain Aaron’s attention.

If Aaron noticed that Andrew was looking at him, he didn’t show it. Instead, Aaron stood
completely still, trying to comprehend that Neil was currently sitting in front of him in a
hospital bed, relatively safe, and not being held captive or beaten.

With stable hands, now, Aaron reached forwards and moved closer to Neil’s body. Both Betsy
and Andrew sucked in a breath at this movement, although Andrew concealed his much
better.

Aaron set one hand down beside Neil’s bed, leaning onto the railing for support while the
other snaked behind Neil’s head and gripped at the back of his neck, the movement practiced
and familiar after having used it the entire week they were missing.

As soon as Aaron’s hand made contact with Neil’s skin, his stiffness melted down and his
fingers twitched where they laid. Andrew’s head tilted up in surprise at the well-known
reaction, and Betsy narrowed her eyes as she looked between Neil and the twins.

Neil glanced around the room, eyes locking onto the exit for a brief second, before
dismissing all the information he gathered and letting out a dry, humorless laugh.

Andrew looked away from the dismissive action and instead let his eyes shift over to where
Bee stood, making sure she didn’t catch him in his moment of emotional vulnerability. Betsy
was staring towards Neil in a mixture of disbelief, confusion, and pity.

Andrew twisted his face until he was confident that it held a more composed and emotionless
expression, then he cleared his throat.

“Stop that.” Andrew spoke, as if it was a simple enough request.

 Aaron pulled his hand back from Neil like he was caught committing a crime, and Neil
scratched at his neck awkwardly, clearly scrambling to regain his own composure.

Betsy opened her mouth to talk, but Andrew sent her a firm look, effectively making her
freeze up. While he didn’t usually turn these dangerous expressions towards someone as
important as Bee, Andrew knew it was necessary at this moment.

“Tell me the truth,” Andrew demanded, looking directly towards Neil this time.

Neil held Andrew’s heated eye-contact and tilted his head at the threatening tone of his voice,
trying to figure out Andrew’s true motive.

A thousand answers popped into Neil’s head. Neil readjusted himself slowly, trying to avoid
quick, painful movements, then, Neil settled on one of them.

“No.”

Chapter End Notes

new chapter just dropped and can i just say thank GOD. i got so side-tracked every time
i tried to get any writing done for this chapter that i honestly wasn't sure it would ever be
completed. anyways, i tried to make this chapter pretty long but once again it is
currently unedited so feel free to leave a polite AND constructive comment if you see
any errors. there will probably be a few of them and hopefully i will catch them the next
few times i reread, but as you know i usually don't proofread before posting something,
so y'all might find mistakes before me. ALSO i hope you guys all liked this chapter.
despite my poor attention-span i really enjoyed writing this one. thank you so much for
all the comments, kudos, and support from on the last chapter. i greatly appreciate
everything you all do for me, and i hope you all like this chapter enough to continue
commenting and reading :D going to try to write some more pretty soon, so i don't keep
y'all waiting super long for the next chapter.

until next time,

vee <3

P.S. i keep getting repeat comments about translating this fic to make it more accessible
to others, and i want to post my response here so everyone can find it easier. i am fine
with people translating this fic as long as i am given FULL (!!!!) credit and recognition
as the author. additionally, i request that these translations are done as accurately as
possible in order to keep things the way i intended when writing :) okay yes that is all
for now.... anyways BYEEEEEEEEE
 Chapter 9
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

The pills were now cleared from the bed, where they had been previously scattered in the
heat of a breakdown.

Neil, Aaron, Betsy, and Andrew all sat quietly in the room, neither of them making a move to
speak. Andrew’s glare was fixated on Neil, his frustration at its highest since choking out
Kevin in Baltimore.

Neil didn’t falter under the expression. While he wasn’t as used to Andrew’s animosity as
others were, Neil wasn’t new to being threatened or being the target of someone’s anger.
Aaron, on the other hand, who was relatively familiar with Andrew’s current state, sat
confused about what had encouraged his mood this time.

For the first time in many years, Betsy felt out of her element. While she was familiar with
Andrew and relatively comfortable with Aaron, Neil was someone she had never been too
close with. With all three boys struggling with something different at the exact same time, she
wasn’t sure how to approach the situation in order to make everyone feel safe and heard.

Aaron was the first to break the awkward silence. His voice was raspy when he spoke, but he
only swallowed the pebbles in his throat and continued on anyway.

“What are we doing?” he spoke, exasperated and tired in all the worst ways. “I can’t stand
sitting here and pretending like nothing happened. We have been gone for a week, and now
we are wasting our freedom by ignoring each other and pretending nothing ever happened.”

Betsy stood taller at Aaron’s initiative to start a conversation, Neil let his stiff posture sink
down slightly at the realization that he was hurting those around him, and Andrew tried to
hide the shock from his expression at how defeated his brother sounded.

It was easy for Andrew to pick up on the changes in his twin’s behavior. While Aaron had
once been angry and opinionated with every thought he possessed, now, he was simply
resigned.

Andrew found relief in the reminder of Aaron speaking out for Neil earlier. The feisty,
resilient energy was proof that his spark was still there. It was trapped and buried beneath
layers and layers of hurt, but it was still there deep down, unlike Andrew’s.

Betsy rose to her feet, immediately gaining everyone’s attention.

“I agree with your comment, Aaron. It isn’t helping to ignore what happened. In fact, I think
we would all benefit from talking about it some. How about I call Katelyn and Nicky inside,
and we can all settle down and have a discussion.”
Aaron and Andrew both scrunched up their eyebrows at the mention of their cousin and were
quick to speak up in disagreement about him coming inside. Betsy didn’t acknowledge either
of the twins and, instead, turned to face Neil head-on.

A small nod from Neil was all it took to silence the room once again. Both Andrew and
Aaron stopped their commentary and forced themselves to relax back into their seats.

It had been about ten minutes since Nicky and Katelyn had entered the room, and so far
nothing had been said.

Neil was still stuck in his hospital bed, too injured to move around a lot, but Aaron had left
his spot open for Katelyn and, instead, taken a position in a chair between the two beds.
Andrew sat closest to the door while Nicky sat as far away from everyone as possible.

Betsy took a small look around the room at everyone’s expressions before hopping upwards
onto the bottom of Aaron’s bed, a few feet away from Katelyn’s legs.

“I think it would be good for us to start this conversation now so we can talk before everyone
gets too tired. Is that okay with you guys?” Betsy questioned, focusing her question mostly
towards Neil and Aaron.

After receiving a shrug from Neil and a nod from Aaron, Betsy folded her hands and made
herself more comfortable.

“I think it would be best to address the tension in the room if you are all fine with starting
there. I talked to Nicky a little bit before coming inside, and I think he would really like to
say something to Neil if you’re willing to hear him out.”

Neil didn’t respond for a moment, and Nicky took that as his cue to continue on. Clearing his
throat, Nicky called out to Neil, effectively gaining his attention.

Nicky’s assumption about being able to talk was very quickly denied by Andrew. “A lack of
response isn’t considered approval, Nicky.” His voice was firm as he spoke, and Nicky nearly
jumped out of his chair trying to correct himself.

Neil looked over to Andrew for the first time since he had spoken to him earlier and tilted an
eyebrow in his direction. Andrew did not offer Neil a response, so Neil simply redirected his
gaze towards Nicky and offered him a small, forced smile.

“Yes, Nicky. You can talk.” Neil spoke, somehow still genuine and caring even though Nicky
had hurt him.

“Neil, I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am,” Nicky said, his eyes watering as soon as
he began talking. “I don’t have any reason or excuse for… you know? forcing myself on you
like that at Eden’s. I should have apologized a long time ago, but I didn’t even realize how
bad it was until Aaron mentioned being assaulted while you two were gone.”
Neil nodded his head and offered Nicky another smile, this one stretching a bit higher on his
cheeks and pulling his scar in a weird way.

Andrew scrunched his eyes in Neil’s direction before looking back at Nicky again and
relaxing back into the chair. While Andrew would not be able to excuse or forgive Nicky’s
actions, Neil was clearly relieved to have received an apology and have this issue recognized.

Betsy waited a few seconds for Nicky to collect himself. When she was sure that he had
calmed down slightly, she pushed forwards to the next conversation topic, desperate to help
move everyone forward as quickly as possible, not being able to handle seeing her boys all in
so much pain at the same time.

“I think things are going well so far, and if everyone is comfortable, I think we should
continue on by talking about the time when Neil and Aaron were missing. I know that you all
had different experiences during that week, but if you’re comfortable it could be beneficial to
talk about it. Considering everyone here is all very close, I truly believe you can become a
beneficial tool for each other and help with the healing process. A good support system is
really important in situations like these.”

Aaron ducked his head down, suddenly intimidated by the suggestion that he had initially
made to talk about things. How was he meant to describe something to Nicky and Andrew
when he still hadn’t been able to process or understand it fully himself?

Nicky, sensing his cousin’s discomfort and still feeling like he needed to make up for his
gross behavior, took the lead and started things off.

“I’m not even sure I remember what happened at the beginning. I left the game already and
headed back to fox tower with some of the upperclassmen to go eat after our game. I knew
Neil, Aaron, Katelyn, and Andrew were going to catch up later, so I left without thinking
about it.”

Nicky scratched at the back of his head uncomfortably and glanced over to Andrew who was
purposely glaring at the tiled floor in the room.

“It was about an hour later, I think, when I got the call from Andrew. He sounded… different.
He asked where Aaron and Neil were, and I told him they were still at the court. Andrew
hung up immediately, so I called back, but it kept going to voicemail. I guess I could tell that
something was wrong even then, but when Katelyn walked through the door alone, struggling
to carry Aaron’s bag, my heart dropped.”

“We didn’t know at the time if it was someone from Neil’s past, but Wymack called the
police as soon as he heard you two were missing. It took a couple hours, but the police had
discovered it was a forceful kidnapping based on a security camera in the parking lot.”

Nicky sighed and let his shoulders fall. “It all gets a bit blurry after that. It was just…. hard
without you two here” he eventually chokes out.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget it,” Nicky said, his voice lowering in volume, “I’m
not even sure if I want to forget it. One thing I am sure of is that I’m scared, and I’m tired of
being scared. After everything that happened, I really just need for you all to be okay. I need
for us all to be okay.”

Aaron raised his head again and looked into Nicky’s blurry eyes, tears starting to gather in his
own. With an annoyed and embarrassed expression, Aaron forcefully wiped the lone tear that
managed to escape down his cheek.

“I don’t know what to say,” Aaron admits.

Katelyn looked around the room waiting to see if anyone else was going to speak up.
Realizing nobody else was making a move, she raised her hand hesitantly.

Under any other circumstances, Andrew would have mocked her for the action, but he
decided to smother the sarcastic comment that was bubbling in his throat for his brother’s
best interest.

“I cried a lot while you were gone,” Katelyn admits.

“I was scared for you, and I missed you so much. I didn’t know what was happening to you,
Aaron. I still don’t entirely know what happened, and I understand that you might not want to
tell me, so I want you to know that you don’t need to until you’re ready.”

Katelyn stopped talking then, and Andrew looked over to her expectantly, which caught both
Aaron, Neil, and Betsy’s attention.

Andrew flicked his hand out dismissively, gesturing for her to continue on talking. Katelyn
looked up at Andrew in disbelief before huffing and giving in to their silent conversation.

“There was also a time…” Katelyn drawled out, “where I struggled with keeping myself
involved. I stopped leaving my bed for a few days and I wasn’t eating much, but Andrew
stopped by one day and made sure I started taking care of myself again.”

Aaron didn’t even attempt to hide his surprised expression. Andrew nearly snorted at the
complete astonishment on his brother’s face.

“You’ve been begging me to be nicer to her for months, did you change your mind?” Andrew
shrugged, hoping to divert Aaron’s attention.

Neil watched as Aaron’s eyebrows scrunched up in frustration and felt the corner of his
mouth twitch upwards at Andrew somehow managing to get back under Aaron’s skin almost
immediately. The whole thing felt nice. It felt normal.

That is, it felt normal for about two seconds before Betsy motioned for Aaron to talk now,
knowing Andrew and Neil would probably be the most stubborn.

Aaron took a minute to organize his thoughts and prepare himself.

“I’m not entirely sure of everything yet. When it first happened, I was terrified about what I
was injected with. That fear lasted up until the time when I woke up tied to a chair opposite
of this idiot,” he said, pointing over at Neil.
“I tried to scream out for help at first.” Aaron watched as Neil winced in his bed at the
reminder.

“I quickly realized that all that did was let Steven, Justin, and Dickhead know we were
awake. They came to visit us, then, and that was when I realized that they thought they had
Andrew instead of me. Then, Steven kissed me and everything just kept getting worse from
there on out."

Andrew leaned forward in his chair, waiting for Aaron to continue on. It took him a few
seconds to talk again, and Andrew hated how Aaron’s hand shook as he spoke.

“Things changed after that. They kept us from eating anything or drinking anything until our
bodies were too weak to function. That was when they finally released us from the chairs and
ropes. Things were pretty blurry for a while because of how dehydrated and hungry we were,
but eventually they started feeding us really small portions to keep us alive.”

“They gave us water on the condition that we had to kiss them before getting it. We held off
on that one as long as possible, but one day Justin just…. kept pushing until it happened. Neil
managed to steal the whole bottle when he wasn’t looking. It was better for us after we had
some water to drink.”

Neil simply nodded his head in agreement, not pitching in any other details.

“It was manageable for a while. Obviously, it was still hard living off of so little substance,
but they weren’t drugging us anymore, we weren’t tied up, and they were leaving us alone for
big portions of time. Plus-”

His explanation was interrupted by Andrew cutting him off.

“What happened during the time that they didn’t leave you alone?” While Andrew’s voice
was flat, Aaron knew that if he was asking at all, it was important to him.

Aaron quickly shot his eyes over at Neil waiting for an objection, a comment, or even an
acknowledgement, but he was only met with a blank face and a quiet mouth.

“Sometimes they would taunt us. Steven liked to try things. He wanted to get alone time with
me and do things… but nothing ever happened outside of a kiss. Whenever he got close
enough, Neil would do something to distract him.”

“What happened after that?” Andrew pushed.

Aaron was quick to take the bait this time, not even sparing Neil a glance as he answered.

“He would just get angry, really angry. Neil took a lot of beatings to protect me. He made
sure nothing more than a kiss would ever happen. I patched him up the best I could when
things were bad enough.”

“We were taking turns sleeping for a while as well. Neil thought of the idea after both of us
woke up to Justin screaming at us one day. It was harder to fight back when we were both
half-conscious. Rotating rest times helped a lot. We didn’t get caught off guard much after
that.”

Betsy smiled at Aaron’s words and wiped a small tear from the corner of her eye with a tissue
that seemed to appear out of thin air.

Andrew paid no attention to Nicky or the cheerleader, too enthralled by all the information he
was currently getting.

Aaron hesitated for a minute and subconsciously balled his fist.

“At the end, we could tell something was wrong. Steven and Justin both stormed into our
room screaming. They looked pissed. Steven’s fists were clenched so tight that his hand was
turning white. Both of their faces were red, and as soon as I jumped awake I could tell it was
going to be bad.”

“Neil was positioned in front of me already since he was the one staying awake at the time.
Steven looked right through him and straight at me. He told me that he was done waiting and
that my time was up. He wanted to hurt me, and Neil stepped in again, like he had been doing
the whole time.”

“Things went differently this time though.”

“When Neil insulted Steven this time he looked like he was going to kill him. I for sure
thought this was it, so I held onto the back of Neil’s shirt and when Steven tried to yank him
up, the shirt ripped from the force.”

“I don’t know how Neil got so high up, but Steven reached a leg under him and kicked me
for trying to intervene. As soon as his foot made contact, I knew that I had a concussion. My
head hurt so bad that I blacked out for a few seconds,” Aaron admitted.

“My brain must have known that Neil was in danger though, because I came back even
though I was in so much pain. When my eyes opened again I could faintly make out Steven
choking Neil where he had him pinned against the wall.”

Everyone in the room turned their head to look at the bruises around Neil’s neck, still angry
and red from being held so tightly.

“I could see Neil’s face lose its color and his lips turn blue. Steven went to punch him, then,
but Justin finally stopped him. As soon as Justin spoke out, Steven let Neil go so that he
could get some more air.”

“What happened next?” Katelyn asked, fear in her voice.

Aaron looked over to Neil, now, and the two held eye contact as Aaron spoke.

“They took him.”

Katelyn and Nicky both visibly reacted to the news, but neither Aaron or Neil noticed past
their eye contact with each other.
 “I finally passed out from the pain, and when I woke up again, he was gone.” Aaron
explained, finally looking away from Neil.

It took Andrew only a few seconds to process the words before he whipped his head in Neil’s
direction.

The two locked eyes for a brief moment before Neil pointedly looked away, and Andrew
closed his eyes in response, hating the way his heart was pounding and his breath caught in
his throat.

The silence in the room was louder than it had ever been before.

“Perhaps we should take a break,” Betsy suggested, standing from her seat to go hand Nicky
a tissue.

Chapter End Notes

okay......... HI

how did you like this chapter? i know it might seem a bit ooc for everyone to talk out
their problems so quickly, but i really wanted to grasp the desperation that Aaron and the
others have to move on and get back to normal because i know that is a common
response to trauma, and i just want them to be happy and healthy so i'm forcing it...
sorry not sorry :P

anyways, i think i like the way this chapter came together. i ended up writing it over
multiple different days with big gaps in between, so i have no clue if everything flows
well or not, but i was too excited to finally post something again and i did not look
anything over (surprise surprise.... i do not proof read). on that note, please feel free to
NICELY let me know if there are any mistakes or errors that you can find.

P.S. life has been crazy lately, so i apologize for such an inconsistent and strange writing
schedule, but to be fair i did warn you all at the very beginning that i don't have a set
schedule.

thanks again for all the love and support :D your comments and kudos inspire me more
than you know <3 keep being awesome y'all !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 Chapter 10
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

It had been hard to focus on anything over the sound of his heart beating out of his chest and
the suffocating, heavy lump in his throat, but Andrew could see Neil’s shaking hands from
the corner of his eye.

It had been about five minutes since Betsy had put an abrupt halt in the conversation, sensing
things were only going to get worse from this point forward. The room was still silent outside
of beeping hospital machinery and the occasional sound of Katelyn’s mug hitting the table
after another small sip of tea.

The quiet did nothing to calm Andrew’s mind or racing heart. In fact, the quiet somehow
made his thoughts louder and more graphic than he suspects they would have been otherwise.

Betsy, seemingly picking up on the tension in the room, makes the decision to continue the
conversation from before. Her eyes flicker from person to person and when Katelyn gestures
to the door, Betsy gives a small nod signaling she is allowed to leave.

Katelyn doesn’t say a word as she rises from her seat, but she raises her hand to Aaron,
waving goodbye for the time being.

As soon as the door closes behind Katelyn, the entire room shifts. Aaron lets himself his
shoulders drop down and sinks into his seat, Betsy lets out a small breath, Neil raises his head
for the first time, and Andrew leans forward, anxiously waiting to hear what happened next.

“So, they took Neil into the other room?” Betsy questioned even though Andrew assumed
she already knew the answer.

Aaron did his best to nod his head, not quite trusting his voice in the moment. Neil remained
still, trying his best not to give anything away at the words.

Betsy turned to Neil, then, giving him her entire attention. When she spoke this time, her
voice was quieter and as kind as Andrew had ever heard it before.

“Neil, do you want to talk about what happened next or would you prefer not to say
anything?”

Neil shrugged at her words, assuming that it would be an accepted answer. After a few
seconds passed and Betsy had not looked away from him, Neil licked his cracked lips and let
his voice slip through.

“I don’t know what to say” he admitted, the vulnerability seeping from his body.

Betsy nodded in understanding, “Do you not want to say anything, or do you not know how
to communicate what you want to say?”
Neil took a second to consider the question before responding.

“I know it would help everyone if we talked about it, but I don’t know how to do that. I can’t
just talk about it like Aaron did.”

Betsy shook her head at his response, clearly disapproving of something he was saying. Both
Aaron and Neil stared at the therapist in confusion, obviously not understanding the issue
with what Neil said.

Betsy turned her head to glance at Andrew’s expression, curious as to how he reacted to her
actions. It was no surprise to her that Andrew had picked up on what Neil did wrong,
considering it was something Betsy had scolded Andrew for many times in the past.

“Neil.” Betsy said, turning to face him once again. “I need you to understand that you don’t
have to do anything you don’t feel comfortable with. It doesn’t matter if talking would help
everyone else if it might harm you. I do not accept helping others at the expense of yourself
during my sessions. If you aren’t comfortable talking about it just yet, then we can focus on
something else.”

Andrew didn’t miss the relief in Aaron’s eyes at the realization that Betsy wasn’t upset at
Neil. The fact that Aaron was even concerned about such a thing made discomfort rise in
Andrew’s chest. Aaron should know that Andrew wouldn’t trust Betsy if she was a bad
person.

“No,” Neil was quick to explain, “I think it might help me to talk about it too. I never really
got the chance to talk through things with people growing up. Obviously, ignoring and
running from my problems didn’t help. I don’t know… maybe this will.”

A small smile fought its way onto Betsy’s face at his growth, remembering how Neil had
been so against the idea of seeing her when he first arrived at Palmetto.

Accepting Neil’s words and trusting that he would stop if things weren’t going well, Betsy
continued on with the conversation.

“So you don’t want to talk about things like Aaron did. That is completely okay, Neil. Do you
have any ideas how it might be easier for you to communicate what happened in a different
way?”

Neil shook his head at her question, clearly defeated that he wasn’t sure what to do. Andrew
pushed the bittersweet feeling out of his chest and spoke, directing the attention of everyone
in the room towards him.

His voice was raw and his words were laced with thick emotion, “a truth for a truth?”
Andrew suggested.

While spilling his secrets in front of his twin brother was never something Andrew could
imagine himself doing, he knew that their little game was one way of communicating that
Neil had been comfortable with before.
 Neil was quick to meet Andrew’s eyes, clearly confused with his suggestion. Neil knew how
much Andrew valued his privacy and couldn’t understand why he was willing to sacrifice
that now, after everything.

Neil’s startled expression only got worse when Betsy admitted that she thought it was a good
idea.

“No,” Neil stated, in disbelief of Betsy’s approval. “You said that you won’t accept helping
others at your own expense. How is this any different?”

Betsy seemed slightly taken back by Neil’s fierce expression, not expecting such a response
from him at this moment. Andrew shook his head slightly, enamored by how strong Neil felt
for those around him.

“Junkie,” Andrew called, effectively gaining Neil’s attention back.

Neil’s eyes searched Andrew’s expression eagerly looking for any slight explanation. Andrew
shook his head in Neil’s direction, trying to signal that Andrew wouldn’t have suggested this
if he didn’t want to.

Neil let his head fall down, then, and sat silently contemplating the offer. His eyes were still
fixated on the ground when he spoke, muffling his voice ever so slightly.

“Truth for a truth” Neil agreed, hating how different things felt this time around.

Chapter End Notes

listen....... i think this is the shortest chapter i've ever written, and i hate that i couldn't
figure out how to make it longer BUT i assume (?) this next chapter will be lengthier
because it is finally where the big reveal / discussion happens and splitting that up into
multiple parts might mess up the flow.

also, its kind of weird to write a dedication at the end of a chapter, but i really wanted to
write something personal to show my appreciation for everyone who comments on my
fics!!!!!! i wouldn't have had the inspiration or motivation to write this chapter if it
wasn't for your kind words and support. therefore, this chapter is dedicated to my most
two recent comments on the last chapter ( lila and camilla ) <3 i appreciate the love
more than you all realize :D

p.s. i apologize for the delay in posting but real life has been kicking my ass lately and i
also forgot i had this fic published for about a month. lol..... my bad!!!!! i really want to
get better with posting but i kind of feel a depressive episode coming on so it could go
either way.

until next time nerds :p

 Chapter 11
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Aaron glanced nervously between his brother and Neil, overwhelmed by the silent stare down
they were having.

Neither Neil nor Andrew paid any attention to the other blonde in the room and, instead,
settled for studying each others’ expressions to see who would break first.

Andrew refused to break the silence first, already feeling too revealed after suggesting such a
vulnerable game.

Neil, on the other hand, didn’t mind speaking first if necessary but felt a spark of excitement
at the idea of a challenge for the first time since he returned.

Aaron cleared his throat, trying to get the attention back on the conversation and let out a
deep sigh at the realization that both Andrew and Neil had checked out for their game of
chicken. Turning his head towards Betsy, Aaron threw up his hands in defeat.

Betsy shook her head, a small smile on her face at his actions before tilting her head at him.

Aaron wasn’t completely sure what the head tilt meant, but he decided to interpret it as
permission to start the game that Andrew had suggested. Betsy didn’t object as Aaron
repositioned himself to face Neil and Andrew.

Betsy watched from the side as both Andrew and Neil shot their attention over to Aaron as he
spoke the first truth of the night.

“Truth for a truth… I feel too messed up to be with someone as perfect as Katelyn.”

Neil let his expression soften, finally hearing Aaron admit to his feelings directly.

“Truth for a truth,” Andrew jumped in, “she is just as messed up as you are. She just carries it
differently.”

Aaron couldn’t help scrunch his nose up in response, clearly not pleased with Andrew’s
suggestion.

Betsy was quick to hop in before an argument sparked up, “I think what Andrew is trying to
say is that everyone has their own issues and feels like they aren’t enough in some way. I
personally believe both you and Katelyn are lucky to have each other. It is very clear that you
care for one another deeply.”

Neil watched as the angry, confused lines on Aaron’s forehead slipped away the more that
Betsy explained. Andrew sat silently, clearly content with his addition to the conversation.
While Neil didn’t completely believe that Andrew’s truth was sufficient enough, he decided
to remain quiet about his opinion and continue on with a truth of his own.

“I don’t remember how many people I’ve killed anymore,” Neil admits. “I know that each
kill was out of self defense, but sometimes I still wonder if there was another option.”

Betsy tried not to let her eyes widen too much at the topic and instead sat silently, knowing
that this discussion was too important to interrupt.

Aaron spoke next, “I’m scared the nightmares won’t ever stop.”

Neither Neil nor Andrew responded to Aaron’s truth, both too familiar with nightmares to
offer any comfort.

Andrew tried not to let his fingers twitch as he grew impatient. Tilting his head back, feigning
nonchalance, Andrew gave away one of his more trusted secrets in hopes to get to the part of
the conversation he needed to hear.

“Truth for a truth. Drake was not the first person to assault me.”

Both Neil and Betsy were aware of this information already, however, it did nothing to
prepare them for Andrew revealing the fact to his brother so soon into the game.

Andrew ignored the shock on his brother’s face in favor of raising his eyebrows at Neil,
encouraging him to give a good truth back. In return, Neil scanned through his memories,
searching for something worthy enough to match Andrew’s reveal.

It took a few moments for him to find something, but the others all waited patiently as Neil
contemplated which truth to give away.

“I feel different now. It feels like things are heavier somehow… I don’t know if it makes
sense, but I think something about me has changed inside.”

Alarm bells rang in Betsy’s head at Neil’s words. Betsy wasn’t sure how to interpret what
Neil had said, but a few of the possible implications had her worried more than usual when it
came to Neil.

Before Aaron had the chance to give his next truth, Betsy cut in, searching for more details
from Neil to ensure he wasn’t a danger to himself.

“Sorry to interrupt, but would you mind elaborating on that for me Neil?”

Neil looked over at Betsy with annoyance clear on his face. For a second, he contemplated
telling her that he would mind, but one concerned look from Aaron stopped him.
Remembering back to Andrew’s truth, Neil decided he would be fine giving out a little more
information.

“I don’t know how to explain it really,” Neil said. “It’s like things are louder now. Bad
memories aren’t new to me, but it’s like… some memories are more upsetting now than they
used to be.”
Betsy let out a breath of relief at the fact that Neil wasn’t suicidal or planning to harm
himself, but his words did little to relieve her worries about his mental state.

Andrew, on the other hand, who had known about a lot of Neil’s bad memories, trauma, and
triggers, found himself irritated at the idea that Neil withheld certain things because he didn’t
deem them ‘as traumatizing’ as others.

A few seconds passed by before Aaron came forward with his next truth.

“Some fucked up part of me misses my mom, even after everything she did.” Aaron
mumbles, clearly ashamed for feeling this way.

Andrew completely ignored this truth, not regretting his actions at all if it meant protecting
his brother from any more abuse.

Neil nodded his head in understanding. After all, he missed his mom too even though several
people in his life considered her abusive, Andrew included.

Andrew didn’t waste a second before giving his next truth, clearly eager to move past his
turn.

“I feel angry at myself for what happened.”

Betsy deflated slightly at the admission, even though she had a feeling Andrew would be
blaming himself for his brother and Neil getting hurt.

Neil looked as though he wanted to ask for clarification but decided against it after Andrew
shook his head dismissively.

Neil looked around the room debating on which of his two truths to give up next. He knew
what really needed to be talked about, but Neil couldn’t bring himself to admit it quite yet.

“I don’t feel safe knowing the third guy is still out there somewhere,” Neil spoke. Aaron’s
face dropped at his words, remembering that they didn’t know what happened with Dickhead.

Neil almost felt guilty for reminding him, but being in such bad physical condition would
make it hard for him to defend Aaron, so Aaron needed to be prepared for the worst.

After regaining his composure, Aaron pulled at the edge of his shirt, attempting to figure out
what to say next. While he had lots of things to talk about, most of them were reliant on Neil
revealing what happened, and Aaron didn’t want to say anything if Neil wasn’t ready to face
it yet.

Aaron couldn’t think of anything on the spot, so he settled for an easy truth. Something
important but still simple.

“My head fucking hurts like hell,” Aaron scowled.

If anyone in the room was disappointed at his small admission, they didn’t show it. Instead,
Andrew continued on with the game using a truth he was nervous to expose.
“I wanted to hurt myself when I found out what happened,” Andrew muttered, hating the way
the words made him feel weak. Andrew then slid off his arm bands and turned his arms so
that his wrists were face up.

Neil inspected his arms eagerly, desperate for the confirmation that Andrew didn’t relapse
while he was gone.

Aaron sat shocked at the blunt honesty his brother was showing. He pushed aside the urge to
walk over and lay his hands over the scars.

Andrew threw his armbands towards Neil, choosing not to put them back on for the night.

Neil let the fabric fall in his lap, his body too drained to try to catch them. Relief shot up at
the realization that there were no knives inside the armbands. Neil wasn’t sure how he would
feel seeing them just yet.

The stab wound in his gut pulsed uncomfortably, and Neil redirected his pain. HIs panicked
eyes met Aaron’s and Neil took a deep breath.

“Steven and Justin,” Neil spoke, his voice shaky and uneven “They hurt me. The entire time I
was there, they were constantly hitting me… and then they stormed in that last day, and I
could tell something was different almost immediately.”

“Up until then, it had only been the beatings and the occasional forced kiss, but I pushed too
far trying to distract them and I guess they didn’t like what I had to say” Neil scoffed.

“They took me into the other room and they started hitting me and hitting me more. They
kept going until I couldn’t fight back anymore. Then, Steven tied me up and they ripped open
my shirt. I tried to fight back at first, but eventually I realized there was nothing I could do to
get untied.”

Andrew averted his eyes, choosing to focus on the floor rather than Neil or his brother.

“At first it was just a few small touches and kisses, but they wanted more and I wasn’t
interested in giving it to them. I wasn’t following their orders, so they made me pay. You
always said my mouth would get me into trouble… I guess you were right” Neil finished, his
words bitter as he forced them out.

The room was uncomfortably still.

Betsy wiped a singular tear from her eye before it had the chance to fall. Aaron stared up at
Neil, his face haunted as he remembered hearing Neil’s broken screams from the other room.

Andrew turned his head to face Neil suddenly, a fire in his eyes.

“They raped you. Yes or no?” Andrew asked, desperate to be hearing Neil’s words wrong.

Neil whipped his head to face Andrew, flinching as the word seemed to echo around the
room. Andrew’s hands were shaking violently and Neil watched as his eyes grew glossy. Neil
felt his throat dry up at the sight and rushed desperately to comfort Andrew.
 “Andrew,” Neil breathed out, “It’s fine. I’m-”

Andrew slammed his fist into his thigh, ignoring the way everyone in the room flinched back
at the sudden movement.

“Do not tell me that this is fine, it is not fine!” Andrew yelled, furious at Neil for even
implying such a thing.

“They raped you… yes or no?” he asked again, his voice even more broken than before.

Neil let his shoulders drop from where they were wound tightly. He let his head hang down,
not daring to make eye contact with anyone

“Yes,” Neil admitted, his voice quiet and small in all the worst ways.

The room went still. Andrew took the words like a punch in the gut and shook his head
willing his thoughts to disappear.

“Truth for a truth,” Andrew choked out, voice shaky after finally hearing what happened, “I
hate you.”

Neil tried not to flinch at the pain in his voice as Andrew spoke. He watched, then, as
Andrew rose from his chair, hands shaking and breathing erratic. Neil couldn’t turn his head
away from the sight of Andrew stumbling out of the room.

Neil didn’t turn his head to see Aaron’s reaction to the situation or let himself get distracted
by Betsy running out of the room after Andrew.

Neil’s voice was unrecognizable when he finally uttered out his last truth of the day.

“I know.”

Chapter End Notes

.............. hey guys

been so nervous to share this chapter with you guys that i was honestly debating on
completely deleting this entire fic and pretending like it never happened. despite that
anxiety, i powered through and wrote probably one of if not the most heartbreaking
chapters yet (chapter 1 was also pretty devastating so idk).

i would like to say a HUGE thank you yet again for all the kudos, comments,
bookmarks, subscriptions, and support. the response to this fic so far has been so
incredibly overwhelming and i cannot thank you all enough for that. as you all probably
know, i usually don't update really quickly, however, i felt so inspired and loved looking
back on all the nice comments that i've received on this story that i wrote this entire
chapter in like 3 days.

speaking of this chapter..... ahah are you guys okay? i think that last scene was a bit sad
even for me, but i couldn't help myself. this chapter covered a lot so hopefully it isn't too
overwhelming. it is one of the longer chapters i've written in a while, and i couldn't be
happier with how it turned out.

please please please feel free to comment any thoughts or feelings, it inspires me more
than you know.

much MUCH love,

vee <3
 Chapter 12
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Andrew hadn’t returned to the hospital room for the next few hours, the next day, and then
for a week following that. Neil was aware that he was still checking in on Aaron due to the
constant annoying chime of his phone, a ringtone that was specific to his twin, but Neil
himself had received nothing but radio silence.

Betsy continued frequent trips to the hospital to visit Aaron and Neil, encouraging both boys
to talk about the horrors of what had happened to them for the week they were away. Neil
was never one to participate in therapy, but Aaron had pleaded with him on a night they were
both plagued with nightmares, and Neil found himself making a promise that he intended to
keep.

It didn’t matter to Neil that he didn’t believe talking to Betsy would help. Aaron had asked
him to participate in their conversations, so Neil started doing just that. Session by session,
Neil would begin willingly sharing his own input and details when Aaron couldn’t quite get
the story out by himself, and over time, Neil began talking completely on his own accord.

While he would never admit it out loud, it felt good to unburden himself of his secrets. After
a week had passed with Andrew not coming around, Neil longed to relieve himself of a few
truths even if that meant voluntarily talking to a shrink.

So far, during their sessions, both Aaron and Neil had discussed several details of their lives
and how they were feeling about it now. Betsy had a way of getting information out of people
without them realizing what they were giving up and she smirked at Neil everytime he caught
her doing it.

For their first serious talks, the boys avoided the kidnapping entirely, instead, choosing to talk
about past injuries resulting from their childhoods. Aaron admitted this wasn’t his first time
having a concussion and consequently, Betsy eased them both into discussing the violence
they faced at the hands of their mothers throughout their adolescence.

Neil had been told before that his mother wasn’t everything Neil made her out to be. Andrew
used the word abusive more than a few times, yet Neil still denied the claims entirely. Betsy
of course was quick to pick up on Neil’s contradicting opinions about the situation and how
he was treated.

Anyone who looked close enough could see the amount of respect Neil had for his mother. It
wasn’t until you looked a little closer that you would notice the fear that Mary beat into her
son as well.

It turned out that Aaron and Neil were quite alike in the sense that they both cared for and
defended their mothers despite the hurt both women had caused them. And it turned out that
both of them received absolutely zero sympathy about their conflicting feelings from
Andrew.

Aaron couldn’t help but wonder how he had so clearly missed the signs of his and Neil’s
likeness. He supposes it was too hard to see anything past his initial suspicion and hatred for
the fiery redhead.

The trio discussed their childhood violence for a few days, getting used to talking to Betsy
about personal matters before continuing on to more recent events. Starting with the drugs to
incapacitate Neil and Aaron, then moving to the initial kidnapping, the violence that
followed, and finally the assault and murders that led to their freedom.

Aaron talked about how he felt guilt for what had happened to Neil, despite Neil’s insistence
that it wasn’t his fault. He, then, admitted his lasting guilt about the way that Andrew grew
up and how he faced everything alone.

Neil was sure Andrew would smack his brother upside the head had he heard that Aaron feels
guilty for not being assaulted, but he didn’t have the energy to intervene in the conversation;
however, Betsy was quick to interrogate Aaron about his comment and eventually cleared the
idiotic train of thought from his head.

Neil had admitted that while the actual feeling of the assault was highly unpleasant, the worst
part was that he had his body and choice taken from him. Neil became used to physical pain
by a very young age, but losing control of himself was something that always haunted the
man. Betsy, annoyingly, pointed out how the lack of autonomy over his body and life as a
child strongly influenced Neil’s values even now.

Neil thinks he understands, now, why verbal consent is so important for Andrew in a way that
didn’t register for him before. It’s the same reason why Neil dislikes drinking and having
drugs in his system or grows eerie everytime his natural roots grow in. Control is important
to him - to them both – arguably more so than anything else.

At the thought of Andrew, Neil felt himself growing hollow inside. It had been too long since
he last saw man and even Betsy was avoiding the subject, only ever frowning in Neil’s
direction when he mentioned him.

The other Foxes had been stopping by often to hang out with Neil and Aaron, but things still
felt out of place. An integral member of their group was missing, and it bothered Neil most
that he didn’t know if Andrew was okay. .

It hit him on the fourth day without contact that he had truly lost Andrew. At first, he tried not
to jump to conclusions regarding his absence, but Neil couldn’t help but to think back to their
last conversation and how it all felt so final.

The realizations quickly followed that if Andrew was the one who helped Neil to become
real, and Neil lost Andrew, then it would only be a matter of time before Neil loses himself
too.

Neil Josten had never felt so defeated.

 –

Andrew was miserable for a completely different reason. It was almost laughable to him how
everyone who made their way into his life would quickly become hurt. How ironic it was that
he once thought Neil was the exception to this curse.

Andrew knew that the upperclassmen referred to him as a monster, but the words have never
rang so true in his own head. He didn’t need an eidetic memory to recall the different ways he
has ruined those around him.

Aaron had lost his mother because of Andrew, then he lost whatever little innocence he had
left when he was forced to murder Drake. Nicky lost both his youth and the chance to be with
Erik upon taking the twins under his wing. The upperclassmen lost their friend and their
teammate, Seth. And Neil lost nothing short of everything.

In Andrew’s head, all of it seemed to lead back to himself in some sense.

Neil’s entire life had been painful. The least Andrew could do now was spare him any
additional hurt on his end.

Betsy had always been so proud of Andrew for getting clean from his self-harm addiction. He
wonders if she knew that he just found a different sort of outlet to relapse with.

For all the woman’s supposed expertise, Andrew couldn’t help but feel angry at Betsy when
she didn’t pick up on all the hidden meaning behind his words and actions.

Staring down from his position on the hospital roof, Andrew flicks his unfinished cigarette
and watches it fall slowly down towards the cement.

The ghosts of Neil’s voice clouds the air around him, so Andrew takes one last look over the
edge before standing up and heading inside, leaving the whispers of past conversations
behind.

He follows the familiar route down the hospital hallways until arriving at his self-proclaimed
table, which was positioned perfectly to see Aaron and Neil’s door so he could watch as
people go in and out but far enough away that he is just out of their sight.

All Andrew had to do was crane his head just a little bit to the left and he would be able to
see Neil’s face in the window. He wonders if Neil could somehow sense his closeness or if
the junkie was none the wiser.

Chapter End Notes

.... HEY ! i know i haven't posted in a while but uhhhh life has been happening lately
and also i hit a fucking brick wall trying to sort out what i wanted to do with this story
next. i think i've rewritten this chapter a total of three times trying to get something that i
deemed good enough to post, but if i don't update this now then i don't know that i ever
will XD

that being said, y'all know the drill: this chapter is embarrassingly short and absolutely,
completely, most definitely unedited. once again, i have yet to read through for basic
spelling and grammar errors and likely will make small changes throughout the week as
i go through and find them all. thank you so much for your patience and kindness
throughout this journey :D

this is my first aftg fic and i think i've begun figuring out how i want to eventually wrap
it up BUT don't fear as i plan on continuing to terrorize the fandom with my writing
once this fic ends (you're so welcome for that)

shoutout to all the persistent readers who continued commenting on this work despite
my inactivity, this one is especially dedicated to you guys <3

-vee
 Chapter 13
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

There wasn’t much else for Neil to do while recovering in the hospital, so he spent a lot of his
time talking to Betsy and allowing himself the time to truly mourn what had happened to
him, something which was completely unheard of for him up until this point in his life.

He continued feeling more secure the more the two talked and even began slowly working
his way through recognizing his triggers and boundaries from a lifetime's worth of trauma.
The therapist supported him every step of the way, offering Neil the chance to become more
comfortable and secure with allowing himself to be supported and helped by those around
him.

The therapist stared up at Neil from where she sat criss-crossed on the floor, having realized
early on that Neil responds better to therapy when it appears as less formal and clinical.
While she was sure this was something she could easily accommodate to moving forward,
her abilities to control the environment were limited considering Neil was still confined to
healing at the hospital. For now, she did her best to get comfortable and continued on with
their discussion

“Neil, we have made so much progress these past few days, but there is only so much I can
help you with if you aren’t being completely honest with me. I feel like I’m only working
with small pieces of the entire story. I really think we should talk about your current feelings
for Andrew..”

Neil didn’t acknowledge Betsy’s words, still hesitant to think about or discuss Andrew after
the last explosive conversation the two had.

Betsy continued to pry despite the previous lack of response.

“Neil, I know you have expressed before that you aren’t upset with Andrew, so why are you
pushing away an important support system? Help me understand. Is this a form of self-
sabotage?”

Rolling his eyes at the therapist’s words, Neil sent her a flat look, too warm to convey any
actual malice. Betsy tried not to show pride at his public display of emotions, knowing how
hard vulnerability has been for Neil in the past.

“You care about him,” Betsy stated, not leaving any room for Neil to confirm it, both clearly
aware of how obvious a lie it would be if he tried to deny the claim.

“And he cares about you,” she reminded.

This elicited a scoff from Neil.

“He hates me,” Neil parroted, reminding Betsy of the last words the two had shared.

Betsy couldn’t hide the frown that graced her features. Her voice was gentle when she spoke
again, “I don’t think Andrew was being entirely honest about his feelings there-”

Before having the chance to continue on with her words, Neil cut her off, quick to defend
Andrew’s honor despite the current tension between the two.

“Andrew doesn’t lie and it would be incorrect to suggest otherwise… you should know better
than that.”

Betsy smiled at Neil’s sudden spark of energy, admiring the lengths he will go to defend
those important to him.

“I know how much Andrew values honesty, Neil, and I didn’t mean to imply otherwise. I just
don’t think Andrew quite understands, himself, how he feels right now. Part of me knows you
understand this too as you’ve been very careful not to take Andrew’s words directly at face
value before, so I would like to understand what is different this time around.”

Ahh, and there it was.

“It just is different this time around.”

And okay, this had piqued Betsy’s curiosity. She leaned forward some, encouraging Neil.

“You have faced bad situations together before and come back twice as strong. Is there
perhaps a change in your orientation since the kidnapping? It isn’t rare for assault victims to
experience hyposexuality after such traumatic events. Yours and Andrew’s relationship has
never been conventional between all of the precautions you two have to take, I have no doubt
that you two would overcome such an issue.”

Neil stared at Betsy flatly, vexed at her ability to be so far from the truth.

Frustration growing, Neil snaps out angrily, “I thought you would know better than to
assume you understand someone else’s feelings better than they do. I’m not experiencing
hyposexuality or whatever else you might be thinking. I’m still attracted to Andrew and it’s
still a yes with him on my end.”

Ignoring the outburst, Betsy leaned into the small truth Neil revealed about his relationship.

“Are you worried about Andrew?”

At Neil’s silence, Betsy continued on with sad eyes, finally coming to a realization.

“It’s not that you don’t want to be around him, you just don’t think it is still a yes on his end…
that this somehow changes something for him?”

Neil didn’t have to confirm what she had said, Both Betsy and himself had known it was true.
 “This should change things for him,” Neil urged, “How could he possibly be near me
knowing that the same thing happened to us both. I won’t allow myself to be a walking trigger
constantly reminding Andrew about some of the worst moments in his life. We both know he
deserves better than that.”

Betsy nodded her head in agreement, but before she had the chance to speak to Neil further,
Aaron rolled over from where he was previously sleeping in his bed.

Both Neil and Betsy looked over at Aaron’s disheveled frame, still carrying the weight of
sleep on his face.

Aaron mumbles out, grumpy about being woken up, “what Andrew deserves is to make his
own decisions. Can you two please just fucking talk… all this inner turmoil is slowing down
my healing process, and I don’t think I can handle putting up with either one of your sulking
anymore.”

Betsy scrambled to contain her shock about Aaron eavesdropping on their conversation. She
took a second to collect herself, about to scold the Minyard for invading on a private
conversation before Neil’s small choked out laugh got her attention.

When she turned her head, Neil was staring over at Aaron with amusement in his eyes,
clearly not upset at all about his intrusion.

Betsy nodded her head at Neil and slowly propped herself up from where she was sitting,
ignoring the cracking of her knees as she unfolded them. Without a verbal departure, Betsy
waddled her way out of the room and towards the chair where she knew Andrew was hunched
over in, a clear mission on her mind.

Chapter End Notes

hey everybody B) it's me again.

sorry for disappearing i have been living life and such (gags) college started up again
today after a beautiful summer of relaxation, so i'll hopefully be writing more in
between classes and such.

sorry for the short chapter... i rewrote this on many occasions and didn't want to
overwhelm Neil's personal breakthroughs in this chapter with Andriel having yet
another angsty talk, so i decided to end this chapter where i left it. i'm slowly starting to
see an endgame in mind and i can't help to feel both excited and incredibly sad about it
because i don't want this fic to end :(

however, i also have a bunch of new fic ideas brewing in the depths of my brain so
mayhaps something new will be coming after i finish up here
as always, thanks for the kindness and all the kickass support.
until next time, vee <3
 Chapter 14
Chapter Notes

it's alive.......

rushing to post this because I'm quite literally about to leave for work, but HEY ! i wrote
another chapter.

life has been fucking crazy lately and i cannot even begin to explain it. i've somehow
become one of those walking "hey sorry i didn't update for a few months *insert terrible
event* happened" memes

anyways, i promise i didn't forget about this work. no matter how slow my updates are, i
would hate myself if i didn't finish this piece because it means a lot to me <3

that being said, i'm not entirely sure there is anyone actually reading this thing anymore
T-T from what I remember, the interactions on the last chapter weren't as high as they
usually are.... but regardless, if anyone *is* out there then thank you for being amazing.
leave a comment if you can, i love hearing from y'all !!!!

this is unedited, as all my chapters are... i'm going to try to remember to go through and
reread after my shift tonight but honestly i have the memory of a hamster so who knows
anymore.

ANYWAYS.... thanks for being awesome (as usual)

see you all next time B)

-vee

Betsy closed the door to Neil and Aaron’s hospital room behind her, deciding this tension had
gone on long enough.

Andrew pretended not to notice as the therapist left the room, still dedicated to his pretend
disinterest; however, when she closed the door his eyes snapped up to meet hers dangerously.

He wouldn’t offer her the satisfaction of getting up to open the door again, even though it
would give him his line of sight back, but he did glare at her as she made her way to the chair
next to him.

Betsy sat down beside him with a huff, decidedly ignoring his pointed glare. Andrew’s head
tilted slightly to the left, a subconscious indicator that he was growing frustrated. Betsy
thinks that only herself and Neil had been able to pick up on the action, Andrew himself still
unaware of his give away.
“What now?” Andrew grumbled out, clearly aware something was going through the
therapist’s head.

Betsy looked in his direction, feigning ignorance. Andrew’s gaze darkened further in
response.

“Betsy.” Andrew demanded, nodding his head to the door where his brother and Neil were
now blocked by.

“Oh, that. Silly me…. I just figured the boys could go for some peace and quiet. You know
how loud it is out in these halls I’m sure”

“Is everything okay?” Andrew forced out, hating the way concern creeped into his voice.

“Aaron is managing, he is just resting his eyes trying to regain some much needed energy
before his big departure. Did he tell you he is getting released soon?”

And oh, wasn’t this a dangerous game. A very uninteresting and unappealing, dangerous
game. Andrew had bumped heads with Betsy on a few occasions, but this was a new tactic
from her.

“And Neil?” Andrew forced out, narrowing his eyes when he noticed a small smirk on
Betsy’s face.

“Yes,” Betsy supplied, “Neil is in there too. I’m sure he is going to be bored out of his mind
when Aaron leaves, you know. Such a shame he has a few more days before he can be
reevaluated for release.”

It was clear that Betsy had been spending far too much time with Neil because she had
developed quite an attitude that reminded him far too much of his little rabbit.

“Careful Bee,” Andrew snapped, “your stinger is showing… you know very well what
happens when tiny little bugs decide to put up a fight”

“There you are Andrew, I knew we had a stronger connection than the indifference you’ve
been hiding behind. I quite enjoy our talks and the moments we share, I’m not sure why
you’ve been holding back on me” Betsy smiled, all genuine despite Andrew’s previous
threat.

At this Andrew resigned. He both respected and hated the way Betsy was able to understand
him.

“How is Neil?” Andrew finally asked, his voice quiet as if anyone else could hear him in
such a noisy place.

“Neil is healing well physically. As we all know, he is no stranger to injury… this is no

exception.” The therapist explained.

“And mentally?” Andrew piqued, picking up on Betsy’s specific choice of words.

“You know I’m unable to supply you that information Andrew. It’s the same reason I will not
share information about our own confidential sessions with others.”

Andrew stayed quiet, and Betsy jumped on the opportunity to check in.

“Speaking of our sessions, it has been a while since we have talked. I understand this
situation is very troubling for everyone involved, and I apologize for not having much of a
chance to talk with you privately.”

Andrew shook his head slightly, uninterested in her apology when he deemed there were far
more important issues at hand.

“Can we take a moment to discuss your well-being? I’ve been quite worried about how
you’re managing everything, especially considering you don’t currently have a support
system with Nicky, Aaron, myself, and Neil all out of the picture for one reason or another.”

A frown appeared on Andrew’s face at the mention of Nicky. “Nicky is nothing to me,” he
barked out.

Betsy took a moment to formulate her thoughts before speaking again.

“I know what was revealed about Nicky and his assault on Neil is very upsetting and
probably even feels like a betrayal, but I also know that he is one of the few people you
consider family and that you have a lot of strong feelings about him. We have talked before
about your appreciation of him taking in you and Aaron, and we both know what you did to
protect Nicky in the alley. I imagine this is very conflicting for you, having the problem be
one of your own for the first time.”

Andrew shrugged and thought over Betsy’s words. “I have conflicted feelings and that makes
me angry because I know objectively what I should feel and it isn’t that simple for my brain
apparently” he admitted sullenly.

“I imagine these conflicted emotions are making it very difficult for you. Can you think of
any immediate actions we can take to lessen the strain this is causing?”

Andrew’s head fell back in his chair, signaling his defeat. “I know I need to talk about it with
you, but I don’t quite feel ready yet. There is too much else going on and I don’t think I’ve
had the time to actually feel my emotions yet.”

“Andrew, I’m very proud of you for telling me that,” Betsy smiled brightly, “I know we
talked about coming to peace with our feelings before addressing them and it shows great
progress that you’ve been able to apply that principle to this situation. I would be glad to set
aside some time to discuss Nicky and what he did in more depth whenever you’re ready, but I
do think there is a more pressing issue on your mind right now that perhaps we should
discuss now.”

Andrew glanced over to the hospital door, unsurprised by the fact that it was still closed.
“Aaron is getting out soon and Neil will eventually be released too, should we perhaps start
preparing for when this is to happen?” Betsy encouraged.

Andrew raised his eyebrows, intrigued by her failed attempt to be subtle.

“What is there to prepare, Bee? I don’t quite think anyone is interested in a welcome home
party” he shot out sarcastically.

Betsy gave the twin a flat look. “I suppose you’re right about that Andrew, but I believe it
would be better for everyone to know explicitly what is going to happen upon Neil’s release,
don’t you?”

“As it is now,” Betsy started, “you told Neil that you hated him and have since not talked to
or even faced him directly. I’m sure Wymack would easily move him into his place for at
least the time being, but that is something that needs to be prepared in advance.”

Betsy held back a smirk at the dumbfounded look on Andrew’s face. Finally, she thought, she
was making some real progress.

“He-” Andrew huffed out, shaking his head. “Neil isn’t going anywhere. He is staying with
me… with us.”

“I’m sorry Andrew, I was unaware this had already been discussed and established,” Betsy
spoke softly, hands positioned in the air as a form of surrender.

“It doesn’t need to be discussed… for fuck’s sake he belongs with us, he always has.”

“I don’t like these guessing games Bee, did he say something to you that suggests
otherwise?” Andrew demanded, clearly growing more and more frustrated with Betsy’s half
answers.

Betsy gave Andrew a moment to collect himself before speaking again, aware he was
reaching his limit.

“I didn’t mean to insinuate anything Andrew, but Neil has just faced a very large change and
perhaps the current arrangement is no longer effective anymore… for either of you. You have
both shown great reaction to the situation at hand and to be honest, you haven’t interacted
with each other since the truth was revealed. Do you feel comfortable sleeping besides Neil
knowing what happened? Does he feel comfortable sleeping near you? These are all
important questions Andrew.”

Andrew scoffed at Betsy’s suggestion, hating that she was right. “Of course I feel
comfortable sleeping beside Neil, he is still Neil. What happened doesn’t change that, it
doesn’t change anything for me.”

“Does Neil know that?” Betsy said softly.

Andrew tried to imagine things from Neil’s side and how he might think of Andrew’s
reaction. Did Neil not know that they still had their ‘nothing’, that Andrew had wanted their
‘nothing’.
that it was never really ‘nothing’ to either of them.

And this… this is something Andrew had neglected to think about. Damn Bee for getting into
his head and making him leave his comfortable bubble of self-guilt.
 Chapter 15
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

If the nervous jump was anything to go by, Neil wasn't expecting to have any visitors while
Aaron and Betsy were away.

The two were currently in an examination room down the hall confirming the details of
Aaron’s release with a few final brain scans.

Aaron assured Andrew it was just common procedure after a patient experiences a head
injury, and Andrew had no choice but to believe him due to his own limited knowledge of the
topic. If he had ordered a few medical textbooks from the school library website, nobody else
needed to know about it.

Neil hated the way his body relaxed once he realized it was Andrew despite the two not
seeing or speaking to each other in well over a week.

“Aaron isn’t here right now-” Neil began, stopping once he realized Andrew must have
already known that if his forced disinterest was anything to go by. Neil, of course, knew
better than to believe the expression, but he was no longer sure if he had the right to comment
on it considering Andrew’s anger towards him.

Andrew paused for a second, caught off guard by the familiar sound of Neil’s voice, hearing
it for the first time since their last talk. Working to compose himself, Andrew closed the door
behind him and hoisted himself up onto Aaron’s currently unattended hospital bed.

“Did you need a minute? I can’t get off these machines completely quite yet, but I can
unhook myself and go into the hallway for a few minutes,” Neil spoke genuinely.

Andrew huffed and rolled his eyes at the comment, “Don’t be stupid, rabbit.”

A small smirk graced Neil’s face at the nickname and Andrew hated the way the redhead
tried to hide it once he realized it was there.

“We haven’t talked in a while,” Andrew stated dully, “and the ever annoying Bee has brought
something to my attention.”

Neil listened to Andrew’s words intently, nodding to encourage him to continue.

“Aaron is getting out soon, and you will follow not long after.”

Neil pushed down the sense of panic at the twin’s words, always hating the reminder that
soon he would be in here all alone.

Before Neil had the chance to inform Andrew that Matt, Allison, and Dan promised to visit
as often as possible, Andrew spoke again.
“Where will you go once you get released?”

And that wasn’t exactly what Neil was expecting to hear. It was something he had tried not to
dwell on whenever the thought crossed his mind.

With Andrew hating him now, Neil knew he wouldn’t be able to stay with him anymore. He
knew it would be hard for Andrew to be in the same room as him- let alone the same bed,
especially after what happened during his and Aaron’s kidnapping.

He had slept in many different places throughout his years, but none of them gave the same
feeling of protection and safety as the dorm. Neil knew Matt or Wymack would gladly have
him back at their place, hell they had both already offered, but Neil was defeated because
despite their kindness and Neil’s comfort with them, it wasn’t home.

“I-” Neil stuttered, searching for the appropriate words.

Andrew scrutinized Neil as he paused, trying to intercept any possible emotion coming from
the younger boy’s face.

“I can have one of the upperclassmen go grab my duffel from our… from your room. As for
the rest of it- uhh,” Neil scratched his head, struggling to think of a plan.

“Neil”

“Well I can come by and grab everything else once I get released, but it won’t be for a few
more days at least-” Neil continued his ramble.

“Neil”

“or maybe Kevin wouldn’t mind dropping it off at the court temporarily-”

“Neil.” Andrew snapped, his tone dangerously low.

Neil whipped his head up at this, his head tilting slightly to the side confused about the
source of Andrew’s irritation. Had he said something wrong?

“Where do you want to stay?” Andrew questioned, eyes narrow.

Neil’s mouth dropped open, visibly thrown off by the question. He looked into Andrew's
eyes, then, expecting anger, but all he could see was anticipation and intrigue. Neil was
confused, was Andrew upset with him or not?

“Where do you want me to stay?” Neil cleared his throat.

Andrew gave him a flat look and Neil hated the way his heart did a somersault at the action.

“Don’t ask stupid questions. You know I don’t want anything.” Andrew tensed as he spoke,
the words sounding less and less true the more he said them.
“You don’t have to switch dorms,” he tried instead, a statement rather than an offer this time.
“If you want to stay with us, you can,” Andrew declared.

Neil’s eyes widened at Andrew’s words.

He allowed himself to smile for only a brief moment before his face fell once again. Andrew
decided that he hated the sight.

“No… I- Andrew. That dorm is your space, it is where you deserve to feel safe. I won’t let
you throw that out the window for my sake.”

Andrew’s eyebrows scrunched up, “I wouldn’t have offered it if I wasn’t sure. You don’t
make me feel unsafe. If I thought you were a threat to my people or to myself, I would have
dealt with you a long time ago.”

Neil sat before him dazed. Andrew wished if only just this time that Neil would read in
between the lines.

“You said you hated me,” Neil remarked, as if that was all the explanation that was required.

“I hate a lot of things, Abram, but you haven’t been one of them for a very long time. I was
pissed off, yes, but it wasn’t you that I was hateful towards, it was myself.”

“No,” Neil rejected, “I won’t accept that. It doesn’t make any sense, you didn’t do anything
wrong. And it doesn’t even-” Neil shook his head, exasperated.

“Why did you ignore me all that time if you didn’t hate me, if you weren’t upset with me?”
He settled on, now both angry and confused.

Andrew stilled at the question, his vulnerability eating him alive.

“I felt… I feel,” Andrew corrected, “guilty about what happened. The only reason you and
Aaron were taken was because of me. It’s my fault that those things happened to you, and
you don’t need the added danger of being around me, not after you already survived so
much.”

“The upperclassmen call me a monster for good reason.” Andrew snarled. “Everyone who
gets close to me pays the price.”

Neil pushed forward from where he was laying back in his bed, “You still think that this
could be in any way your fault? Andrew, those people came for us because they’re sick fucks
who like to hurt people. You can’t control that and neither can I. We have both seen our fair
share of monsters in this world so don’t you dare think about grouping yourself in with those
nutjobs. I know you, you’re not like them.”

Andrew shook his head at Neil’s words.

Neil fumbled with his blanket before ripping himself out of bed. He limped over towards
Andrew and stopped inches in front of him.
“Go ahead, then. If you’re such a bad person then prove it. Hurt me.” Neil scoffed, head tilted
back in annoyance.

And, well… Andrew wasn’t expecting this response.

Growing up, people didn’t listen to what Andrew had told them, no matter how steady his
voice. So Andrew worked hard to make himself untouchable, perfecting his reputation by
always hitting first.

Fuck Neil for looking so trusting; for looking like he actually believed the words he spoke.
That Andrew was somehow not the villain that everyone painted him to be. That they were
both just victims of a cruel world forced to hide behind a false facade of invincibility.

“It was never your fault. It could never be your fault, Drew.” Neil whispered, a step closer
than Andrew had remembered him being.

Andrew’s head turned to the side unconsciously, a futile effort to hide himself from the
broken boy in front of him.

“Listen to me, Andrew. I’m not a liar anymore. I said this wasn’t your fault and I meant it, so
stop trying to make up my mind for me. I told you it was yes with you a long time ago and
you believed me then so why can’t you believe me now?” Neil huffed out, completely
exhausted.

“Your name is Neil Josten,” Andrew begins,

“You are a striker for the Palmetto State Foxes and you are safe,”

“You’re an exy junkie and a rabbit,”

“You are not a liar,”

“You are real,”

“And I believe you.” Andrew states, his voice growing shaky towards the very end.

Neil let out a breath and his body sagged, overwhelmed with relief.

Andrew moved slowly, then, careful that his moves were fully predictable and avoidable
when he advanced his hand towards Neil’s face.

“yes or no?” Andrew proposed, his voice weak as he spoke.

Neil stared up at him, eyes unsure and somehow so certain at the same time. And if that
didn’t sum up the anomaly of Neil Josten, then what did?

“Yes.”

And it didn’t matter then that things would be different. That they would face new triggers
and have to find new compromises.
 That they would still face challenges, such as the paranoia about the location of the third
kidnapper and every bad day ahead of them.

It didn’t matter to them, nothing did. Neil had taught Andrew how to be gentle when he
thought it impossible, so Andrew would stick by Neil’s side in return.

They had each other, after all. And that was all either of them truly needed.

Chapter End Notes

RAHHHH .

so this is it (?) i think this is where i feel comfortable ending this story.

i have always known that this story would have some loose ends, but it would be too
convenient for everything to wrap up perfectly. i have re-written the last page about five
times before finally settling on this sort of open ending, so i hope it isn't too unsatisfying
for y'all. as someone with commitment issues, i liked the idea of there being a little tag
to hang onto in case i ever wanted to revisit this idea and perhaps write a sequel or one-
shot in the far far future (MAYBE).

thank you all for taking this journey with me and for all of the support along the way <3
these past few years have been an absolute RIDE for me, so i hope this fic was able to
bring any of you comfort like it did for me. this silly little work reached a lot farther
than i ever could have anticipated... 20,000 reads and climbing since i last checked. the
appreciation i have for you all is unmatched. please feel free to comment if you have
anything you want to say- i love interacting with you guys.

i promise this will not be the last of my writing for this fandom.

thank you, you were amazing

- vee <3
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