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Awareness Attachment Styles

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hzade.lemann2002
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8 views

Awareness Attachment Styles

Uploaded by

hzade.lemann2002
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Attachment Styles

To follow is a simple and easy to understand overview of attachment styles. There is


much more information on how we attach in childhood and how it manifests our adult
relationships. This workbook will give you an introduction to the different styles and
what they may look like.

There are four different attachment styles:

Secure Avoidant
Attachment Attachment

Ambivalent
Disorganized
(Anxious)
Attachment
Attachment

The Paradise Process


Secure Attachment
Children who are securely attached can become visibly
upset when their caregivers leave and are happy when
their parents return. When frightened, these children
will seek comfort from the parent or caregiver.

Parents who are tactile, loving and caring are readily


accepted by securely attached children and they greet
the return of a parent with positive behavior. While
these children can be comforted to some extent by
other people in the absence of a parent or caregiver,
they clearly prefer parents to strangers.

Parents of securely attached children tend to play


more with their children. These parents react more
quickly to their children's needs and are generally
more responsive to their children than the parents of
insecurely attached children.

Studies have shown that securely attached children are more empathic
during later stages of childhood. These children are also described as
less disruptive, less aggressive, and more mature than children with
ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles.

AS CHILDREN: AS ADULTS:
Comfortable to separate from parents Have trusting, lasting relationships
Seeks comfort from parents when Have good self-esteem and self-worth
frightened or upset They share feelings with partners and friends
Are happy when their parents return They seek out social support
Prefers parents to strangers

The Paradise Process


Ambivalent (Anxious) Attachment
Children who are ambivalently attached tend to be
extremely suspicious of strangers.

These children display considerable distress when


separated from a parent or caregiver, but do not
seem reassured or comforted by the return of the
parent.

In some cases, the child might passively reject the


parent by refusing comfort, or may openly display
direct aggression toward the parent.

As adults, those with an ambivalent attachment style often feel


reluctant about becoming close to others and worry that their partner
does not reciprocate their feelings. This leads to frequent breakups,
often because the relationship feels cold and distant.These individuals
feel especially distraught after the end of a relationship.

AS CHILDREN: AS ADULTS:
They tend to be wary of strangers They are reluctant to become close
Become very distressed when to others
parents leave They worry that their partner does
They do not appear to be comforted not love them
when parents return They become very distraught
when relationships end

The Paradise Process


Avoidant Attachment
Children with avoidant attachment styles tend to
avoid parents and caregivers. This avoidance often
becomes especially pronounced after a period of
absence.

These children might not reject attention from a


parent, but neither do they seek out comfort or
contact. Children with an avoidant attachment
show no preference between a parent and a
complete stranger.

As adults, those with an avoidant attachment tend


to have difficulty with intimacy and close
relationships. These individuals do not invest much
emotion in relationships and experience little
distress when a relationship ends.

They often avoid intimacy by using excuses (such as long work hours) or
may fantasize about other people during sex. Research has also shown
that adults with an avoidant attachment style are more accepting and
likely to engage in casual sex. Other common characteristics include a
failure to support partners during stressful times and an inability to
share feelings, thoughts, and emotions with partners.

AS CHILDREN: AS ADULTS
May avoid parents May have problems with intimacy
Do not seek much contact or comfort Invest little emotion in social and
from parents romantic relationships
Show little or no preference for Unwilling or unable to share thoughts or
parents over strangers feelings with others

The Paradise Process


Disorganized Attachment
This is a combination of both the avoidant
and ambivalent attachment styles. They will
have a high percentage of both styles and
are not clearly one or the other.

This can be a very chaotic way of attempting


to attach to a partner because there is very
little perceived security and the person will
veer between the 2 attachment styles, which
can be very difficult for their partner to
understand or connect with.

The Paradise Process


Attachment Styles

Now it's your turn... Take some time to reflect on what you have learned. Which
characteristics resonate most with you?

The Paradise Process

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