How to have confidence in yourself

3 parts: Look confident Think with self-confidence Practice self-confidence

Self-confidence is something very, very complicated. It's very easy to depend on others to
feel good about yourself when in reality you should only depend on yourself. The good
news is that you are the captain of the ship of self-confidence and you are ready to sail the
seas.

Part 1

Look confident

1.
Dress for the occasion. Otherwise, fake it until you have self-confidence. If you know that
you look like a capable and confident person, you will eventually start feeling that way, too.
You should dress the way that makes you feel best, not the way you think a confident
person dresses. Try the following tricks:
• Spend a little time every day on your personal hygiene and make sure you
 look good.Shower every day, brush, floss , and groom your skin and hair.

• Dress for self-confidence. You don't need to buy a whole new wardrobe to
feel better in your clothes. As long as it's clean, comfortable, and feels good,
you're ready for self-confidence. After all, you wouldn't wear a three-piece
suit to deliver a pizza. If you think you look good, chances are you do.

2.

Perfect your posture. The way you carry yourself says a lot about you to others, so be sure
to let them know that you are confident and in charge. Keep your shoulders back, your spine
straight and your chin up. Walk with purpose instead of dragging your feet and sit up
straight. When you see yourself as a confident person on the outside, the world will see you
that way.
 Not only will you deceive others, you will also deceive yourself. Recent studies have
shown that body posture tells the mind to sit a certain way, so having a confident
posture will make you look truly in charge. And to top it all off, having confident
body language has been linked to lower stress levels . [1]

3.
Smile. Always have a smile on your lips. You'll be surprised how even the smallest smiles can
defuse any social situation and make everyone feel more comfortable. Can you imagine yourself
approaching someone with a frown? No, thanks.

• If you're worried that your smile looks fake, don't smile so much. A fake smile
can be recognized from afar. On the other hand, if you're truly happy to see
someone or just happy to be able to practice your new self-confidence skills,
then show off those pearly teeth!
4.
Establish eye contact . It's a subtle change, but it could greatly influence the way others
perceive you. Don't be afraid to look the other person in the eye: it will not only show them
that you are someone worth talking to, but it will also tell them that you respect them,
acknowledge their presence, and are interested in the conversation. You don't want to be rude,
do you?

• Our eyes are especially human. They are the window to the soul, if you like,
and show our attention and feelings. By establishing eye contact you will
improve the quality of your interactions as well as seem more confident. In
fact, you will seem more pleasant, trustworthy, and your interlocutors will feel
more valued. [2] If you can't do it for yourself, do it for them!
Your body language should be more approachable. If you see a person huddled in the corner
pretending to be playing on their cell phone, would you really go up to them and say hello?
Maybe not. If you want others to approach you, make sure you are approachable!

• Keep your body open. If you have your arms and legs crossed, you will be letting
everyone know that you are not interested in receiving them. The same goes for the face
and hands. If it's obvious that you're worried about something else (whether it's a
thought or your cell phone), others will take the hint.
5.
Keep your gaze. Now that you've mastered eye contact, it's time to put it into practice. Did
you know that others are just as shy as you when it comes to making eye contact? Try this:
look someone in the eyes and see who lasts the longest. Does that other person look away
before you? You see? It also feels uncomfortable!

• No, Hola magazine does not encourage its readers to stare at everyone. Staring at
someone until they feel your gaze and are embarrassed by the obvious discomfort is
not the goal. However, the goal is for you to realize that others get just as nervous as
you about the idea of looking someone in the eyes. If you get caught, just smile and
you'll get out of trouble.
Part 2
Think with self-confidence

1.
Recognize your talents, your qualities and write them down. No matter how down you
feel, try to cheer yourself up and remember what you excel at. Focusing on your attributes
will distract you from perceiving your flaws and increase your self-worth. Think about your
qualities in terms of your physical appearance, your friendships and, above all, your
personality.

• Remember the compliments that others have given you. What have they said about
you that you would never have perceived or recognized? Maybe you've been
complimented on your smile or your ability to remain calm and composed in
stressful situations.

• Remember your past achievements. It could be something others remember, like

when you were first in your class, or something only you know, like a silent act of
service to improve someone else's life. Be aware of how great it was. Come on!

• Reflect on the qualities you are trying to cultivate. No one is perfect, but if you are
actively trying to be a good and honorable person, give yourself credit for the effort.
The fact that you plan to improve yourself indicates that you are humble and kind-
hearted, those attributes are positive.
 • Now write down everything that comes to mind and read it the next time you feel down.
Add more elements as you remember them so that you can be proud of making them.

2.
Think about the obstacles that prevent your self-confidence. Take a piece of paper and
write down anything that you think prevents you from being a confident person, for example,
low grades, shyness, lack of friends, etc. Now ask yourself this: Is this valid, logical? Or are
they just my assumptions? FYI, the answers are “no” and “yes,” respectively. How do you
think that something can determine your personal value? Not at all!

• For example: you didn't get good grades on your most recent math test, as a
result you don't have enough confidence for your next test. But ask yourself
this: if you studied hard, together with your teacher, and prepared for the exam,
would you do better? Yeah! It was just a bad day and it has nothing to do with
you. You have no reason not to have confidence in yourself.
3.
Remember that everyone struggles with self-confidence. Some are very good at hiding it,
but almost everyone has struggled with their self-confidence at one time or another. You're
not alone! And if you can think of someone who is confident, chances are they don't have
that same confidence in every situation. Trust is rarely universal.

• This is a fact: most people are too concerned with how they project
themselves to constantly judge you. Have you not noticed how people love to
talk and see things in which they barely see themselves reflected? 99% of
people focus inwardly. Be relieved and recognize that you don't have to be
perfect all the time.

• Stop comparing yourself to everyone. Not everyone is in a competition and

seeing life that way will leave you exhausted. You don't necessarily have to
be the most popular, most beautiful, and smartest person to be happy. If you
have a strong competitive streak that you can't completely ignore, try to
compete with yourself and strive to keep improving.
4.
Look at the trust as If i were a process, not an achievement specific.
Have
Self-confidence is not a goal that you cross once, and the process will not always be
progressive; always there will be days in that you feel that you start
from scratch. Breathe
Deeply, remember the hurdles of self-confidence that you have successfully crossed and
resolve to move forward. In the hardest moments, it's good to force yourself to cheer up, even
if you haven't done anything.

• Chances are, you won't realize how confident you are until you are. Has there
been a day when you realized you were smart, funny, witty or punctual?
Maybe not. So if you don't see immediate changes, keep in mind that it's only
because you're viewing the scene from very close up. Like when the trees
don't let you see the forest. You get the idea.
5.
Remember that you were born with it. No, it is not a Maybelline advertisement. When you
were born, you didn't care in the slightest who heard you cry or how soft your head was. You
were just there. It was society that pointed the finger at you and made you feel like you had to
live up to things. It was something learned . And, you know what can be done with the things
learned: they can be unlearned .

• Exploit the confidence you were born with. It's there, it's just buried under
years of exposure to flattery, threats, and perceived judgment. Take everyone
out of context, because they are not interesting. They have nothing to do with
you. The only good thing is “you”. “You” exist apart from any other judgment.
6.
Get out of your head. Lack of confidence has nothing to do with the external world, so you
have to get out of your own mind. If you find yourself having an internal dialogue, stop .
The world revolves around you, so rotate with it. The only time that exists is now. Don't you
want to be part of it?

• Much of the world exists outside your mind (if we assume reality is what it
appears to be). Constantly thinking about how you feel or how you look takes
you out of the moment. Try to stop thinking about the past or the future.
Focus on what is in front of you, because there may be something exciting
about it.
Part 3
Practice self-confidence

1.
Take advantage of your hobbies. If you've always wanted to be good at a sport or hobby,
now is the time! Improving your skills will reinforce the idea that you are talented, therefore
increasing your confidence. Learn a musical instrument or another language, an artistic
expression, such as painting, start designing projects, anything that catches your interest.

• Don't be discouraged if you're not immediately amazing. Remember that

learning is a process, you should also learn for the small victories and for the
recreational time that relaxes you, not to be the best of all.

• Start practicing a group hobby. Finding people who think like you and share
your hobbies could be an easy way to make friends and boost your self-
confidence. Look for groups you can join in your community or look for
affinities with those who have the same
hobby.
2.
Talk to strangers. Seriously, self-confidence is more than a state of mind, it's a habit.
That's all humans really are. So for you to be self-confident, you must do things that require
security. One of them is talking to strangers. It is intimidating at first, but over time you will
become more and more brave.

• No, you won't scare anyone unless you're a Ku Klux Klan member who looks
like an aggressive Quasimodo and smells really bad. If someone suddenly
greeted you and asked if they should go to Starbucks or another coffee shop,
how would you feel? Probably fine. Everyone likes to be the hero, talk to
other people and be spontaneous . [3] You'll be brightening up their otherwise
monotonous day.

• So you don't have a chance, do you? What do you think of the waiter in your
cafeteria? The girl at the supermarket checkout? The strangers who pass by
you on the street?
3.
Don't apologize too much. Being able to apologize is a positive trait (and something that
too many people struggle with). However, try to say it only when necessary. Apologizing
for having slighted or made someone uncomfortable is polite, but apologizing when you did
nothing wrong could make you feel subordinate and like you need to apologize. Before it
leaves your lips, take a second to make sure that it is actually a situation that warrants an
apology from you.

• Use alternative routes. You will be able to express your compassion or regret
without actually apologizing. For example, if you're worried that you've
made someone uncomfortable, you might say, "I hope I haven't caused you
too much trouble" instead of automatically saying, "I'm sorry."

• Apologizing unnecessarily will make you seem insecure. It doesn't make

sense, because you are not inferior to anyone. Why should you apologize if
you haven't done anything wrong? After all, are you serious? And if you
apologize all the time, it will lose its value. Apologizing for everything
implies that you apologize for nothing. Think of the phrase “I'm sorry” as if it
were “I love you.” You just have to say it with intention.
4.
Accept compliments politely. Don't roll your eyes or ignore him, it's your compliment!
You deserve it! Make eye contact, smile, and say “thank you.” Being nice when someone
wants to compliment you does not compromise your humility; It shows that you are
educated and have strong personal value.

• Pay a compliment to the person who gave you one. If you're still
uncomfortable accepting compliments, try complimenting the person who
gave you one after accepting it. Doing so will help you feel that you are
“even” and that you haven't been too arrogant.
5.
Increase your self-confidence by helping others. Take the time to compliment someone or
do a good deed without announcing it. You will make their day special and you will feel
better about yourself. When you become a source of positivity, others will try to be with you,
thus reinforcing good vibes.

• Many people are not good at accepting compliments. Chances are, if you
compliment someone, that person will too. Just make sure you mean it, or you
might respond skeptically: “I love your shirt. Is it made in China?” might not
be the best answer.
6.
Throw away those who make you feel bad. It is difficult to have confidence in yourself
when you are with a group of people who, in your opinion, always judge you. You might be
the most outgoing, loud and confident by nature, but with these types of people, you will
become an ignored puppy. You will have to discard these people as you would a bad habit.
Right now.

• It is important that you surround yourself with those who, in your opinion,
make you feel like you are the best version of yourself. Only by surrounding
yourself with those people will you achieve the growth you want (and can!)
achieve.
7.
Go slow. Many people do not like large audiences and many fewer people like public
speaking. If you find yourself in any of these situations, it will be important to go slowly.
When we are nervous, we tend to behave quickly to get it over with. Don't do it, because it
will be an indication that you are nervous. And you'll be telling yourself you're nervous too!

• Point number one is breathing . When we breathe short and sharp, we are
telling our body that it has to prepare to fight or flee. Stop doing it and you will
see that you will automatically calm down a little. Fortunately, humans are not
as difficult as quantum physics.

• Point number two is to consciously slow down your actions. Imagine a 6-year-
old child who is hyperactive due to having consumed a lot of sugar: that child
is you. Match your actions with your breathing. Bingo. Serenity.
8. Onl
y
Expect success. Much of life is a self-fulfilling prophecy. When we think we will fail, we
don't try very hard. When we believe we are not good enough, we do not behave as well. If
you wait for success, you could be attracting it to you. Pessimism could actually undermine
your abilities. [4]

• Surely now you say: “I don't predict the future accurately! Expecting success
is illogical, weren't you advocating logic a second ago?!” Actually, yes, but
look at it this way: you often expect to fail, so why not expect success? Both
are possible circumstances and for the most part, one is no more likely than
the other. Point for us!
9.
Take risks. Sometimes the only way out is to take risks. In order to be good in life, you will
have to face experiences that force you to learn. You won't be able to be an expert right
away. If you keep doing what you've always been doing, you'll never be good at anything.
You will have to take risks to grow.

• Failures are inevitable. They always happen and it doesn't matter. The only
thing that matters is that you recover. Everyone suffers setbacks, but
overcoming them is what will boost your confidence. To achieve this, you
must first fail.

Tips
• You should look more confident in yourself. When you walk, focus on the
place
wherever you want to go. Make sure you sit down right.

• When you wake up in the morning, look at yourself in the

mirror and tell yourself what have you
You've come so far in life that you won't let anything or anything make you feel bad.
• Sometimes people say bad things out of envy. Remember to smile and enjoy life
because it is very short.
 • Speak in a positive tone. When you see that you are going to say something negative
about yourself, instantly replace that comment with a positive one.

• Stop being a perfectionist. Nothing and no one is perfect. High standards have their
place, but your daily life will have setbacks and flaws. Accept them as learning
experiences and move on.

• Remember to live each day as if it were your last. Nobody knows which one will be
the last. Who cares what other people think as long as you think positively and feel
good? Show them who's boss. Enjoying every day with a smile on your lips is the
best way to move forward.

• Be grateful for what you have. Many times, the root of insecurity and lack of
confidence is the feeling of not having enough, whether it be emotional validation,
good luck, money, etc. By recognizing and valuing what you have, you can combat
that feeling of being incomplete and dissatisfied. Seeking inner peace will do
wonders to improve your self-confidence.

• Set goals, not expectations.

• You are the only person who will always know you. Love yourself and others will
follow you.

• Retrain your inner voice. In situations where you think you lack
Confidence in yourself, realize that your inner voice tells you negative things. You
will need to retrain your inner voice to be positive on those occasions.

• Forget about what they will say. Your happiness is not anyone else's business, it's
yours alone.

Never forget
• Being arrogant and being self-confident are two very different things. Being
arrogant is a negative thing, while being self-confident is not. You must know how
to distinguish them.

• Your life's mission should not be to do everything to have self-confidence. You

should do things that make you happy. In happiness you will find self-confidence.