Introduction to

  Premarital  Counseling  at  LBC  

We’re  very  excited  for  your  engagement  and  for  all  that  God  will  do  as  you  move  toward  
marriage.  Thank  you  for  the  privilege  of  assisting  you  and  your  fiancée  as  you  seek  out  premarital  
counseling  at  LBC.  What  you’ll  find  in  this  brief  introduction  is  a  short  guide  to  premarital  
counseling  at  LBC,  including  a  description  of  each session.

WHAT’S  THE  POINT  OF  PREMARITAL  COUNSELING?  

There  are  five  purposes  for  premarital  counseling.  

First,  we  want  to  help  you  build  a  solid,  biblical  foundation  as  you  start  your  marriage.    So,  we’ll  
spend  a  lot  of  time  in  Scripture  and  thinking  through  biblical  ideas  as  they  apply  to  marriage.  

Secondly,  we  want  to  help  you  begin  a  dialogue  about  your  marriage.  There  are  a  host  of  topics  
(communication,  finances,  sex,  parenting,  etc.)  that  we  think  are  important  to  consider  before  you  
get  married.  The  good  news  is  that  the  conversation  we  are  beginning  is  a  life-­‐long  process.  We’ll  
solve  some  problems,  but  many  others  will  be  left  for  you  to  work  though  over  the  course  of  your  
entire  marriage.  We’ll  start  the  dialogue,  and  leave  the  rest  to  you.  

Thirdly,  we  will  point  out  areas  of  concern  in  your  relationship.  We  are  all  sinners.  No  relationship  is  
perfect.  Despite  all  of  your  premarital  bliss,  you  are  going  to  have  problems,  conflict,  and  struggles  
in  your  relationship.  We  want  to  help  you  address  these  difficulties  sooner  rather  than  later.  So,  the  
more  honest  you  are  about  your  struggles,  the  more  you  will  facilitate  the  counselors' to help  you  
in  preparation  for  marriage.  

Fourthly,  we  want  to  preserve  you  from  temptations.  Lots  of  Christian  couples  do  a  good  job  of  
preserving  themselves  from  premarital  sex,  but  once  they  get  engaged,  they  let  down  their  guard  
and  begin  falling  into  sexual  temptation.  Men  and  women  rationalize  premarital  sex  with  thoughts  
like,  “We’re  engaged,  which  means  we  are  practically  married  already;”  or,  “We’ll  be  married  soon,  
so  what  does  it  matter?”.  Even  worse,  some  guys  feel  a  sense  of  entitlement  to  the  woman’s  body  
because  they  are  now  engaged.  We  want  to  help  you  fight  temptation  and  stay  pure  until  the  
wedding  day!  

Fifthly,  we  want  to  prepare  you  for  the  marriage,  and  not  just  the  wedding  day.  We  often  find  that  
couples  get  caught  up  in  the  frantic  details  of  preparing  for  the  wedding  day,  and  don’t  spend  much  
time  getting  ready  for  the  marriage.  Premarital  counseling  is  meant  to  slow  you  down  and  help  you  
think  about  the  relationship.  The  wedding  day  marks  the  beginning  of  your  life  together,  but  the  
marriage  will  last  for  the  rest  of  your  life.  So,  it  is  good  for  you  to  take  time  to  prepare  for  this  life-­‐
long  journey  together.  
 WHAT’S  INVOLVED  IN  PREMARITAL  COUNSELING?  

Premarital  counseling  involves  four  sessions  with  one  of  our  premarital counseling couples.    

Here  is  our  five fold  strategy  behind  the  premarital  counseling:  
READ:                  
You’ll  be  assigned  reading  from  Gary  &  Betsy  Ricucci’s  Love  that  Lasts  and  C.J.  Mahaney’s  Sex,  
Romance  &  the  Glory  of  God.      
STUDY:
In  each  session  you  will  study  Scripture  to  set  a  solid,  biblical  foundation.  
LISTEN:
Linked in each session,  you  will  find  sermons  that  relate  to  topics  covered  in  each  session.  To  
reinforce  the  material  we  are  studying,  we  will  encourage  you  to  listen  to  a  few  of  the  sermons.  
APPLY:
Each  session  has  application  exercises  that  apply  the  key  ideas  to  your  specific  relationship.  
TALK:                          
You   will   have   lots   of   conversations—with   your   future   spouse,   with   your counselors,   with  
your   parents,  and  with  other  couples  in  the  church.  These  conversations  will  both  prepare  you  
for  the  wedding  day  and  help  you  to  grow  in  godliness.  

PREMARITAL COUNSELING SESSIONS        

Introduction:  

• A  marriage  preparation  inventory. You will be emailed the inventory for you each to fill
out and send back to the counseling staff.

• After  the inventories are complete, you will be matched up with your counselors.

Sessions:

• There are  four  pre-marital  counseling  sessions.    Each  session  includes  a Scripture
Study  guide,  applications  exercise,  sermons  to  listen  to,  and  readings.

Session  1—A  Theology  of  Marriage

• Scripture  Study:  Genesis  1:26-28;  2:15-25;  3:1-24;  Ephesians  5:21-31

• Exercises:  Pt.  1  Questions  about  Leaving  your  Family  of  Origin  /  Pt.  2  Wedding
Vows  /  Pt.  3  Your  Strengths  &  Weaknesses
 • Sermons:  Mark  Dever  and  John  Piper
• Reading:  Ricucci’s  Love  that  Lasts,  chs.  1-­‐3

Session  2—A  Theology  of  Communication  

• Scripture  Study:  Matthew  12:22-­‐37;  Ephesians  4:17-­‐32;  James  3:1-­‐18;  4:1-­‐12

• Exercises:  Pt.  1  Communication  in  Proverbs  /  Pt.  2    Working  through  conflict
• Sermons:  Zach  Schlegel  and  Paul  Tripp
• Reading:  Ricucci’s  Love  that  Lasts,  chs.  4-­‐6

Session  3—A  Theology  of  Sex  

• Scripture  Study:  Song  of  Solomon,  1  Peter  3:1-­‐7;1  Corinthians  6:12-­‐20,7:1-­‐7

• Exercises:  Pt.  1  Sex  questions  /  Pt.  2  Interview  a  married  friend
• Sermons:  Al  Mohler,  Mark  Dever,  Thabiti  Anyabwile,  and  John  Piper
• Reading:  Ricucci’s  Love  that  Lasts,  chs.  7-­‐8,  CJ  Mahaney’s  Sex,  Romance  and  the
Glory  of  God

Session  4—A  Theology  of  Everything  Else:  Love,  Money,  Forgiveness,  and  Children  

• Scripture  Study:  1  Corinthians  13:  2  Corinthians  8:1-­‐15;  Matthew  18:21-­‐35;

Psalm  127
• Exercises:    Budget  &  Scheduling
• Sermons:  Al  Mohler,  John  Piper,  and  Andy  Davis
• Reading:  Ricucci’s  Love  that  Lasts,  Epilogue

EXPECTATIONS

In  order to make the most of your time in premarital counseling it will require putting in the work
between sessions to complete the assignments given to you by your counselors. Please be diligent to
complete the Scripture study, readings, sermon listening, and exercises assigned to you before each
session. These are meant to help you grow in understanding God's purposes for marriage and
potential obstacles that marriage might bring. Our hope is that you find this process helpful and
encouraging as you prepare to be married!

Blessings in Christ,

The LBC Counseling Ministry