Part 1

She was looking for fun. Random meaningless fun. It was why she had said yes to her friend’s
invitation to go clubbing tonight.
And yet as she stood leaning against the bar with a martini glass in her hand, faking one last small smile
to the guy who was trying to ask her to dance, she realized that fun was the only thing missing from her
night thus far.
Ironic, because she was doing everything that had summarized the word fun for her – things she knew
would usually cheer her up.
There was dancing, shouting, laughing with her now drunk friends, endless flirting and plenty of alcohol
to lighten her mood. And yet that feeling she was searching for seemed to be eluding her regardless of all
her fervent effort. It all seemed vain, empty. Almost as empty as her heart.
With a huff, she placed the glass on the bar and texted her friend that she was leaving. The group was
dancing so she figured they’d see her message sooner or later and she was too lazy to hustle her way
through the sweaty crowd to tell them in person.
I’m not even drunk, she thought regretfully to herself as she walked out of the noisy club.
Pulling her jacket closer to ward off the chilly night wind, she was about to hail a cab when she noticed
someone standing alone under the street light, away from the crowd.
She looked around, trying to find a group that the person could have belonged to. When she found none,
she decided that the person was probably waiting for someone else, a friend or a lover maybe.
She was about to turn her head in the opposite direction when the corner of her eye caught movements.
The person shifted, adjusted his jacket and brushed a hand on his hair. A man? Alone?
Here? At this hour?
Her eyebrows went up in question, observing this guy until the latter turned his head and their eyes met.
She wasn’t one to blatantly stare at strangers like this but those brown eyes captivated her. There was a glint
to them that she found mysterious yet familiar at the same time. A look that she felt like she had seen
somewhere before although she wasn’t sure where. Not in the people she was close with like family or
friends, and certainly not in those she allowed the privilege of entertaining or satisfying her.
She wondered whether that guy found her just as strange, especially since neither of them seemed to
want to look away.
The thought had barely left her mind when she saw him extending his hand out into the street.
She was puzzled for a second until she sensed bright lights coming up from behind her.
She turned around to see a cab pulling over right in front of the man.
The door was pulled open but the stranger didn’t go in. She kept her eyes on him, and after what felt like
ten minutes, his lips finally moved.
“Do you want to share?”
He must be out of his mind. Sharing cabs with strangers in the middle of the night? In front of a nightclub?
Is he suicidal? Or is he some deranged psycho that preys on innocent unsuspecting women like me? But
he’s too timid and cute to be a psycho. Heck, I’m even willing to bet that he’s just a college student judging
by his -…
“Do you want to share?”
The repeated question interrupted her musings and she found herself hesitating to say no.
“Hurry up, lady!”
She heard the taxi driver’s loud voice and for some strange reason, her gut told her that this could be
that little out-of-the-ordinary fun she was looking for all night. A little adventure, maybe?
Before her logic could even weigh her options or counter that little idea, her feet had moved,
walking towards the open cab door.
“Where to?” asked the driver curtly once the door had closed and the guy had taken his seat a distance
away from her, on the other end of the back seat.
“Where do you live?” the stranger asked her.
She gave the driver her address and watched the guy raise his eyebrows.
It was a reaction she knew very well. Her neighborhood was on the wealthier side of New York and she
never felt the need to hide her social status.
“Never expect someone who lives in that area to take a cab,” commented the guy as soon as the taxi
started moving.
“A friend drove me earlier,” she said, looking straight ahead.
“Where is that friend now then?”
“Still at the club.”
The stranger said nothing.
“Where do you live?” she asked.
“Not next to you, that’s for sure.”
She detected amusement, not sarcasm in the tone and words. “What were you doing standing alone
outside of a night club?”
The guy shrugged. “The night didn’t turn out like I hoped it would.”
She waited for more but that was it. She was contemplating on asking another question when she heard a
low chuckle.
“And to answer your next question, I was hoping that tonight would be different than just another night
out. Not boring. Adventurous. Fun.”
Adventurous. Fun.
The description the guy gave, albeit simple, somehow sounded exactly the same as how she had
wanted her own night to turn out – and what she was looking for.
“Is that why you offered a random stranger to share a cab?” she asked him, turning her head to see an
amused smirk accompanying the twinkling eyes.
“That was just me being nice. Besides, you don’t look like a criminal. Too pretty to look even mildly
delinquent.”
She raised her eyebrows. Is he flirting with me? “Yes.
I’m totally flirting with you.” Her eyes widened. “What
the…” The guy laughed.
It was an unusual chortle of a laugh but she found it charming and strangely contagious because she
found herself shaking her head while holding back a smile.
“So you read minds?” she asked.
The stranger shook his head.
“Am I that predictable then?”
“I don’t know. We’ve just met.” The guy tilted his head, looking at her with a gaze so intense yet playful
that she couldn’t help but blush.
It was different from the stares or the ogling the men back at the club did, or from what the countless others
had done before. Most just wanted one thing, she could see it in their eyes. There was nothing behind that
look of interest but lust, infatuation. She considered them airheads, uninterestingly empty inside. They were
so easy to cast aside after use.
“But you’re interesting, that I admit,” said the other person.
“Why? Because I didn’t run when you offered to share a cab with you?”
“That.”
There was something more and she knew it. But the guy said nothing else so she dared herself to ask. By
now, she had grown too curious about this person whose name she didn’t even know.
“And? What else?”
“That’s only for me to know.”
“Why can’t I know?”
“Because I can’t read minds. The best I could do is guess and my guess could be wrong.”
“What?” She was not getting any of this.
“Never mind.”
“So you’re not telling me?”
“What do you want me to tell you?”
“The other reason to why you find me interesting.”
“I think you know why.”
“I wouldn’t have asked if I knew.”
The guy smirked then scooted closer towards her, instantly causing her to tense.
She saw him cup her mouth with one hand and lean towards her ear.
“I can’t read minds,” whispered the guy. “But I can see you.”
The stranger’s hand moved away from her ear and touched her chin gently, turning it to face him.
She swallowed when she saw how close their faces were. “W-what are you doing?”
Surprisingly, she didn’t feel fear or dislike towards this person or his inexplicable behavior. She looked him
in the eyes and caught that glimmer yet again. Clearer, this time.
There was something behind those dark orbs. She felt like they could see through her even though all she
saw, physically, was her reflection in them.
Something inside her lurched when a soft thumb brushed her chin.
Another smirk appeared before the fingers abruptly pulled away and she found herself frozen in place,
watching him scoot back to the other end of the seat.
She spent the rest of the taxi ride silently trying to get herself together.
This mysterious stranger was confusing yet intriguing and his behavior brought out a mix of emotions she
couldn’t explain let alone understand.
Her chin never stopped tingling after the brief touch and she was sure that her ear was still red. She was just
glad that it was too dark for the guy to notice.
“What is your idea of fun?”
She heard him ask.
“Can’t answer that with just a few words, I’m afraid,” she replied.
“Is clubbing fun? Dancing? Drinking? Having sweaty strangers touch you and grope you?”
“Excuse me?” She turned her head, ready to counter the scrutiny, but saw him leaning against the
window instead, looking out into the night.
“Is it really fun? How is it fun?”
The guy finally looked at her and she saw sincerity.
Those questions were real questions, she realized in surprise. This person was asking her whether
clubbing was fun in general. He wasn’t judging her. “I don’t really know. I guess it’s just a way to let out
steam, to take a quick break from routine or a mundane life,” she answered.
“Really? Like… relaxing?”
She nodded. “Something like that.”
“Relaxing, huh.” The guy was now talking to himself, taking a moment to seemingly wrap his mind
around the idea. “Does it work that way for you too?”
“Depends. It could be fun when done with friends.” “So why
wasn’t tonight fun for you?”
The smirk and the glint returned, and she didn’t know what to make of it. “Why do you want to know?
Weren’t you also at the club?”
The stranger shrugged. “Like I said, the night didn’t turn out like I wanted it to. I just thought it was
the same with you. After all, misery loves company. Or so they say.”
She frowned but before she could say another word, the taxi had pulled over in front of her house.
“Here you are,” said the man.
“Thank you.” She moved to take out her wallet but a hand stopped her.
“No need.”
She saw him handing the driver a wad of cash. How much, she couldn’t see.
She was about to protest but the guy had opened the door and stepped out, leaving her flabbergasted,
scrambling to get out as well.
“Nice house,” said the stranger with his hands in his jacket as he stood in front of the gate, looking up at
the modern townhouse.
“Why…” She saw the taxi drove away. “Why did you do that?” she asked, moving to stand in front of
him.
“Taxi fares must be paid, you know. I really like your house.”
“But we’re supposed to share. And why aren’t you taking the taxi home?”
The guy stopped staring at the house and looked at her. “Do you want me to go home?”
“W-wh-what?”
The stranger leaned just a centimeter closer. Not enough to do anything but enough to send the other
person back a step. “Do you want me to go home?”
“W-wh-… why would I-… how… you can decide that on your own!” she finally said, hoping that her face
wasn’t turning as red as she thought it was. Why am I even blushing?
“What’s your name, by the way?”
“Tracy,” she answered without hesitation before silently regretting it. Last time she checked, she was sure
that she wouldn’t be giving her name and address to some stranger she met on the street but right now, she
couldn’t think of a reason why she should have done the same towards this very interestingly confusing
guy.
“Tracy? American?”
She nodded.
“Nice.”
The stranger took a step forward, backing her into the gate. “What’s your idea of fun,
Tracy? I know you probably didn’t find what you were looking for either tonight.
Otherwise, we wouldn’t be here.”
“I-I… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she stuttered, feeling her back pressing against the cold
hard metal.
“I think you do.”
She saw him tilt his head and felt that slight gentle touch on her chin for the second time tonight.
Her breath caught in her chest when she realized what the guy was doing. Yet her brain and her body
refused to work or move, and she found herself standing still, watching his face come closer and closer.
Then their lips touched.
“What were you looking for, Tracy?”
She heard him whisper, felt his breath on her lips.
She wanted to answer but somehow closed her eyes instead and let him kiss her again, and again, and
again.
She knew perfectly well what had happened when she woke up the next morning, alone in her messy bed.
There was another scent there, lingering on the pillows and sheets. A scent she apparently liked because
she couldn’t stop inhaling it, burying her face in the fabric.
She heard a ringtone and lazily dragged herself out of bed in search of her phone.
She found it in her purse that was lying on the living room carpet, where she had dropped it carelessly
hours ago.
The ringing stopped right when she was about to answer the call. It was her friend, the one whom she had
texted before she left the club last night.
Her thumb moved to unlock the screen but all intentions to call back or to message that friend disappeared
when she saw the note application open, displaying a short sentence on the screen.
“Did you find it, Tracy?”
Part 2

It had been a week since that encounter with the stranger outside the club. She regretted not asking
the guy his name or his phone number because she couldn’t stop thinking about him.
The note was still saved in her phone. She had read it at least twice a day but she couldn’t answer it
nor could she understand why it was left there.
She knew that it wasn’t just an ordinary one night stand. She had had her share of those and none
of it left her feeling this way.
By Saturday, she was already back at that club, searching for that mysterious figure.
Her friends wanted to visit a different club so she was alone tonight. Not that she minded. It was
better this way. She had more freedom and there would be no questioning from people or
mandatory yet awkward explanations.
After two hours and rejecting at least five men, she decided to get one last drink before going home.
It was disappointing, to say the least, but she knew that the chances of seeing her again was very
slim to begin with.
“I hope you’re not planning to drive home tonight.”
The whisper in her ear startled her, nearly making her spill her drink.
She quickly grabbed the napkin and wiped her mouth before swiveling on the leather stool to see that
same smirk from last week.
For a second, she didn’t know exactly what to say now that the person she had been looking
for all night had finally appeared in front of her, leaning against the bar.
“Where are your friends?” the guy asked.
“Um… they’re not here tonight.”
“Oh? I thought you said clubbing would be more fun when done with friends?”
“They wanted to go somewhere else,” she said. “Where are yours?”
“Not here, that’s for sure.”
“What?” She couldn’t hear him clearly thanks to the loud music.
The guy gestured for her to follow him as he pushed himself off the bar, walking towards the
back of the club, where the restroom was.
She frowned but followed obediently. Exactly like their previous encounter, there was
something about this guy that was mysteriously alluring.
Who are you?
The guy walked past the restroom doors, towards a corner at the back of the dimly lit
corridor. There he stopped, turning on his heels. “You were saying?”
She was still frowning a bit, coming to a halt a few steps in front of him. “I asked you where
your friends are.”
“They’re not here.”
“That’s strange. From what you said last week, I could have sworn that you’re not the clubbing
type so why are you here alone?”
“Probably for the same reason why you’re here.” The guy took a step forward. “Did you see the
note I left you?”
“Yes. You should learn social boundaries. Rummaging in other people’s bag is frowned upon.”
“Really?” The smirk reappeared as the stranger’s hand reached out for hers. “Then I
apologize. I couldn’t find any paper or pens so that was the next best thing.”
She swallowed when she noticed the rapidly diminishing distance between them and felt the warm
hand enveloping hers.
She wanted to ask his name but when her lips parted, no sound came out. Instead, she tilted her
head and welcomed the other pair, closing her eyes as she kissed him back.
Her body was spun and she held on to the back of his head, grabbing a fistful of hair just as her back
hit the wall.
She didn’t understand her own reaction to this person she didn’t even know. Or how she could be
so easily enticed by him.
And to make things weirder, none of it felt awkward. It was as if her body was gladly
welcoming the warm yet firm touches while her mind stood aside and watched, not
complaining even for a little bit.
She never experienced this with anyone before. Usually, one of the two would react, set barriers.
Whether it was the body or the mind, one would step up and protect the heart.
Not like this. Definitely not being as comfortably receptive as this.
She felt the other pair of lips pulling away and took the chance to inhale. Her grip on the light
brown hair loosened as she looked into the dark eyes, twinkling at her.
“Who are you?” she asked breathlessly.
“Who do you want me to be?”
“I-…” She forgot what she was about to say when a hot sloppy kiss landed on her neck, making her
arch her back and tilt her head back by reflex. Her eyes closed once again and it took everything in
her to not make a sound.
She felt a pull then realized that their bodies were now pressed flush against each other, arms
wrapping tightly around one another.
The long overdue moan finally left her mouth when the stranger nipped the skin he had been
sucking on for the past minute. Lips and tongue traveled up her neck, leaving a hot wet trail before
they stopped to nibble on her earlobe.
She sighed, feeling her eyes roll back into her head behind the closed lids.
She didn’t know why but this stranger seemed to know how to please her – which spots to touch,
caress or kiss. Just like last week.
She almost whined after that final flick of the tongue, instantly missing the warmth on her skin.
Until she felt her hot breath on her ear and shuddered.
“Are you driving tonight?”
“N-no.”
“Then I’ll take you home.”
–-
She wanted to scream his name. She really did.
It was simply the best she had ever had and it was different from anything she had experienced.
She never bothered giving proper reactions unless she had to. But with him? With him, it was
beyond ecstasy. With him, she wanted to swear, to scream, to bite her lip, to drag her nails down
that smooth milky white back and leave her mark.
She didn’t know why.
So as she lay there breathless for the second week in a row, reveling in the gentle kisses on her skin,
she forced her mind to work. To at least get an answer to that one nagging question.
“What’s your name?”
The kisses stopped and she watched him lift his head, hovering over her.
“Does it matter?”
“What kind of question is that? Of course it matters,” she said, surprised. “Unless you just want…
this.” Her arms dropped from around the sexy torso and she suddenly felt self-conscious as she
scrambled to cover herself with anything she could grab. Her cheeks burned red.
“Whoa. Hey.”
Hands grabbed her wrists, halting her movements.
She looked up and, for a split-second, thought that she saw something different in those
mesmerizing eyes. It was tender, fragile, and definitely not the confident mysterious sparkle she
had seen since their first meeting.
“You are beautiful, Tracy,” the guy said as he kissed both hands and placed them around his neck
once again. “Anyone who just wants this from you doesn’t deserve you.” He leaned down and
kissed her forehead before easing himself onto her, closing his eyes.
The answer and gesture caught her off guard but he wouldn’t let them distract her. “Then why won’t
you tell me your name?” Her hand played with his one ear as she stared into his closed orbs.

“What’s in a name?”
“What?”
“Can’t you just be with me without having to know my name?”
She frowned then shifted, pushing her up a bit. This was the first time anyone had ever been so
reluctant to say his name. “No,” she said, watching him open his eyes.
There it is again, that hint of vulnerability. Who are you?
“You haven’t even answered my question from last week.”
“If I answer you, will you tell me your name?”
The guy smiled. “Depends. If your answer’s no, then I’ll tell you to keep looking.”
“You’ll only tell me your name if my answer’s yes?”
The guy nodded then dipped his head down to kiss her shoulder.
“Why?” She squirmed and pushed him yet again, holding him up by the shoulders, trying to look
into those eyes. “Why all this mystery? Who are you? Why are you doing this?”
The guy smirked, kissed her then rolled off.
She sat up, pulled the sheets to cover herself and watched him get dressed. “That’s it? You’re
not going to answer me? You’ll just disappear again?”
“I’m not a ghost. I can’t disappear,” said the guy without looking at her. “What’s your favorite
dessert?”
She blinked when she heard the random question. “What?”
“Your favorite dessert. What is it?” asked the guy while buttoning his shirt.
“Why should I tell you? You won’t even tell me your name.”
“I like ice cream and cupcakes,” said the guy who finally turned around, meeting her eyes.
“O-kay?”
She really didn’t know what the sudden dessert talk was about.
The guy didn’t move or say anything for a while, seemingly waiting for a better reaction. But when
he got nothing else, he took a deep breath and exhaled. “Right.” He finished getting dressed instead.
“Why do you always talk in this mysteriously confusing way?” she asked the guy who merely
shrugged. “So you’re really not telling me your name? How am I supposed to address you then?”
“Tim,” the guy finally said.
“Tim?” she asked, watching him climb back onto the bed after putting his socks on.
“Yes. Tim,” said the guy as he stopped in front of her, not breaking eye contact for
even a second. “You can call me that if you want.”
“Tim…”
The guy nodded.
“That’s it? Only Tim? What’s the second syllable?”
There was a brief shift of the eyes before the guy called Tim scooted away without a word.
She watched this Tim pick up his jacket then took out a phone from one of the pockets.
“Can I have your number?” asked Tim.
“Can I have your full name?”
“You didn’t even give me yours.”
“Tracy Price or Trace in short. There. What’s yours?”
“I already told you what to call me.”
“I just gave you my full name!”
“I didn’t ask for it, did I?”
“Wha-… now that’s rude, Tim.”
The guy briefly smiled to himself at the sound of the short syllable. “Can I have your number,
please, Tracy?” he softened his tone then approached the bed, gesturing the phone towards Tracy.
She wished she could say no and bargain until she could get his full name but she was afraid that this
Tim would change his mind and walk away instead. As crazy as it was, she wasn’t ready to say
goodbye to this stranger yet.
“Here,” she handed the phone back to its owner after she had typed in her number. “Thanks.
See ya.”
He scooted off the bed, following the guy who was walking out of her room while wrapping the
sheets around herself. She watched him put his shoes on after picking them up from the living
room floor.
“Tim?” she called out before the guy could leave her house.
“Hm?” Tim reached out for the door handle, not turning around to look at her.
“Since you won’t tell me the second syllable, can I just call you Timmy?”
The guy froze.
“Does that sound too childish?” she asked when she saw the reaction – or lack thereof, to be exact.
“I’m sorry. I just suddenly… it just popped up in my head and I-…”
“Sure. Call me whatever.”
She blinked and the guy had disappeared behind the closed door before she could even utter a word.
“That’s… weird,” she mumbled to herself. “But then again, she’s always
been weird.”
Timmy. She smiled as she shuffled back inside the bedroom. Cute.
Part 3

“So who’s the new guy?”

Tracy looked up from her plate, chewing calmly while buying time to answer. “What new guy?” she
finally said after swallowing.
“Oh don’t play dumb. You insisted on going back to that club for a reason, didn’t you?”
She shrugged then continued eating.
“Come on. Who is it? You’ve been seeing him every weekend, haven’t you?”
“None of your business, Luke Riggin.”
The tall young guy raised his eyebrows. “Now this is a first. You usually don’t care enough to hide your
conquests from me.” He leaned forward, lowering his voice. “Is he that good?”
Tracy wanted to keep her face expressionless and say no, but the thought of the mysterious Timmy
involuntarily caused the corners of her mouth to twitch, forming a quick, small smile.
“Well, well… this is definitely new,” said Luke when he saw the split-second reaction. “Who is he?
When can I meet him?”
“You’re not meeting anyone.”
“Why are you so stingy? It’s just tradition. I’m not gonna steal him away from you or anything.”
“It’s not that. It’s just…” How do you explain that he’s merely a one night stand? She was okay with it but
somehow felt that her friend – or anyone else close to her, for that matter – would strongly oppose her
seeing another guy.
“What? It’s just what?” Luke was not backing down.
“Not yet, okay? I don’t want to rush things. Just let me enjoy it, will ya?”
Luke leaned back in his seat, furrowing his brows at his best friend. Tracy never hesitated to introduce
anyone to him like this before. In fact, they would usually have fun discussing the boy toy, down to every
little detail. “You’re acting strange. Is he married?”
“Wh-what?!” She almost choked on her drink. “Of course not! What do you take me for?!”
“Then why are you hiding him like this. I thought we made a deal? Share. Best friends share, Tracy.”
“I know. It’s just…” Tracy exhaled. “I don’t want you to judge me.”
“You know I won’t do that.” Luke’s tone softened. “Is it really that bad? Worse than
that ex guy?”
“No one could be worse than that one. Sigh… I don’t know. Just give me time? I’ll tell you about it in
due time, okay?”
“Hm… okay. Just be careful.”
“I will.” She smiled gratefully at her friend. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

–-

“So she’s seeing someone?”

“Yeah.”
“Who?”
“Not sure. She wouldn’t say.”
“She wouldn’t say? Really? That’s new. Is it serious then?”
“I don’t really know, Sir. It hasn’t been that long, I think. A month? Two tops.”
“I see. Other than that, is she alright? Did anything change?”
“Everything’s alright, Sir. There’s no change whatsoever.”
“Okay. Good. Let’s keep it that way. Please keep me updated, Luke.”
“I will.”
–-
“Timmy?”
“Hm?”
“Why do you do this? With me?”
The guy in his hold shifted and she looked up to see him staring at her.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you have a habit of sleeping with strangers you randomly meet on the street?” asked Tracy, making
the other person chuckle.
“No. I definitely don’t have that habit,” answered Timothy as he ran his fingers along the length of Tracy’s
back, feeling the latter shiver a bit.
“Then what are you doing with me? Is it just sex? Do you keep coming back just because of that?” She had
been asking herself that question since they began meeting regularly but this was the first time she dared
herself to voice it out. She didn’t want to drive this mysterious Timmy away no matter how crazy that
sounded.
“I think you know the answer to that,” whispered Timothy as he moved down to Tracy’s eyelevel
and kissed her tenderly.
She let herself melt under Timothy’s touches for a minute before she pushed him back. “I’m serious.”
“So am I. Do you feel that I’m only here for this?”
“No but… what else is there?”
“Well…” Timothy took Tracy’s hand in his and entwined their fingers. “I like talking to you.” He kissed the
back of her hand. “And I like listening to you talk.”
“Then can you tell me more about yourself?”
Tracy could feel Timothy hesitating like he always did whenever the question popped up.
Despite spending increasingly more time together, most of the stories and talk came from Tracy’s side.
Timothy mostly just listened. When he did talk, it was general, vague and not really telling much about
himself.
“See? This is why I thought it was only sex,” said Tracy when the other person couldn’t seem to say
anything.
“It’s complicated.”
“Why?”
“It just is.”
She sighed, dissatisfied by the answer.
As if apologizing, Timothy gently pulled Tracy closer and kissed her forehead. “You’re free to ask me
anything, you know.”
“Let me guess. I can ask but there’s no guarantee that you’ll answer?”
“I’ll answer.”
“Truthfully?”
“Maybe.”
She shook her head and pushed him away, rolling to the empty side of the bed, her back towards
Timothy.
She heard rustling of sheets and felt a hand on her thigh, the smooth palm gliding up until it reached her
waist. There was a kiss on her shoulder before the hand moved to the front, resting on her belly.
She felt Timothy’s legs pressing against the back of her own legs and almost sighed, loving these
tender gestures that no one had ever done to her before.
Timothy’s finger moved, tracing an invisible T on Tracy’s skin. His lips were still leaving kisses all
over Tracy’s shoulder and back. “Do you… like me… that much… Tracy?” he mumbled between the
kisses.
The finger traced a second T.
“Where’s the ‘and’?” Tracy suddenly asked.
“Huh?” Timothy lifted his head.
“You only wrote two Ts. Isn’t it supposed to be ‘T and T’?”
“W-what?”
Tracy turned to lie on her back and saw a pair of eyes staring at her in shock. “What? Did I say
something wrong?”
It took Timothy another second before he nonchalantly hid his previous reaction. “No. I just didn’t
understand what you were talking about.”
“T and T. Timmy and Tracy. Right?” she asked innocently. “Wasn’t that what you were writing? I mean,
two Ts can’t both be ‘Tracy’, right? It doesn’t make sense. Or are you just too narcissistic so you wrote
two ‘Timmy’s instead?” she teased.
Tracy didn’t get a reaction but instead watched Timothy’s jaws clenching and the brown eyes darkening.
“Timmy? You okay?” She pushed herself up and reached out, placing her hand on Timothy’s cheek.
“Yeah. I just-…”
A ringtone interrupted Timothy. He gently pried the hand off his cheek, kissed it then scooted off the
bed to get the ringing device.
Tracy propped her head on her elbow as she turned to one side, watching Timothy’s face darkening even
more when the latter looked at the phone screen. She raised her eyebrows when, instead of answering, the
other person just rejected the call and began typing furiously in his phone.
“I gotta go,” Timothy said.
“Oh.” She couldn’t hide her disappointment as she sat up, hugged her legs and leaned her chin on her
knees, keeping her eyes on the other person.
Timothy lifted his head from his phone and saw the look. “I’ll come by tomorrow.”
“Can we go out then? Have lunch or dinner maybe?”
“We’ll see.” Timothy placed the phone in his jeans pocket then started getting dressed.
Tracy heaved a sigh. This Timmy never seemed to want to go out with her and do something. Every time
she proposed the idea, she would get subtly rejected. Just like now. “If you’re not only after sex then why
can’t we go on dates?”
Timothy finished buttoning his pants then sat down on the bed, next to the sulking Tracy.
She kissed her cheek. “See you tomorrow,” he whispered before he left the room.
She let out a groan when she heard the front door opening and closing, then threw herself onto the
mattress.
“Why are you so mysterious, Timmy?”

–-

A young woman lifted her head when she saw the car screeching to a halt. “You’re late, Tim. You said
twenty minutes,” she told the person who stepped out of the vehicle, slamming the door behind him.
“What are you doing here?”
“You’re not even going to greet me properly?”
“Go away. Go far far away. Now.”
“I’m not here to bring you back.”
“Then why are you here? To help me?” he scoffed. “You’re their spy. Don’t pretend like you’re doing me a
favor. Go. Don’t tell them where I am. I still have a few months left and I plan to use every second of it.”
“They don’t even know I’m here. I didn’t tell them where you are.”
“How can I trust you?”
“Do you see anyone else?” The tall woman gestured around them.
He paused then shook his head. “How did you even find me?”
“You’re more predictable than you think, Tim.”
“Don’t use that word on me! You out of all people should know to never use that word on me!” he pointed
his finger at the tall young woman and gritted his teeth.
“I’m sorry.”
“Leave, Sab. Now. Don’t contact me. Don’t come looking for me. Just… go.” He spun on his heels and
stomped his way back into his car, driving away in a rage.

–-

The doorbell rang for the umpteenth time and she cursed at it while dragging herself out of bed.
Her drowsy sleepiness disappeared though, once she had seen the face in the small monitor and
buzzed the gate open.
“What are you doing here?” she asked the visitor as soon as she opened the front door.
“Showing you that it’s not just sex.”
“What?”
“Go change. We’re going out.”
“Wha-… At this hour?!”
“Yes.”
Tracy shook her head and almost closed the door in Timothy’s face if not for the latter’s hand holding it
open, palm flat against the thick wood.
“I’m serious, Trace.”
“It’s freaking 2 AM, Timmy!”
“So?”
“So you’re nuts!”
Timothy withdrew his hand and shrugged. “Okay then. Just remember that you’re the one who refused.
Don’t say I never wanted to take you out again.” He expected to have the door slammed in his face and
smirked when it didn’t happen, knowing that his plan had worked. “Well. See ya,” he nonchalantly saluted
Tracy before turning around, ready to leave.
“Sigh… I don’t know why I put up with this,” grumbled Tracy. “Get inside!” she called out to the person
strolling away towards the gate.
“Ssh! It’s late.” Timothy turned his head, pressing a finger to his lips.
“Just get. The hell. Inside.”
Tracy marched her way out of the door, grabbed Timothy by the collar then dragged him inside.

–-

She finally came down from her high and lay there spent, vaguely sensing lips on her skin and someone
lying down next to her.
“Did you like that?”
She heard the low whisper in her ear but couldn’t reply. Her eyes were still closed and she was still
breathing heavily.
A chuckle came next and she knew the other person was about to move to leave so she shot out her
hand, grabbing him.
“You want more?”
She heard the question and finally opened her eyes, turning her head to see her Timmy smirking at her.
All she could do was shake her head weakly and inch closer, draping her arm around the sexy damp torso
to prevent him from leaving.
The other person seemed to understand because the next thing she knew, she had her Timmy’s arms
around her body and his lips on her forehead. She snuggled close and tightened her arm, glad that she
was able to change his mind.
“Sorry we didn’t get to go out after all.”
She heard him mumble against her skin. “It’s okay,” she mumbled back. “Stay.”
“Okay.”
But she woke up to find him gone the next morning.
 –-

Tracy had to go a full week without a word from her Timmy ever since that day. She tried contacting him
but his phone was off. Her messages were never delivered and, since she didn’t know his workplace or
home address, she had no other means to get in touch with him.
Needless to say, she was seething.
Pride aside – she was usually the dumper not the dumpee – she missed him. Her body craved for him
and her heart felt like it missed a little piece of itself.
She didn’t know why. All she knew was that she was going crazy without that mysterious
handsome guy.
Her friends noticed the change but she didn’t tell them anything. Her best friend suspected and asked her
about it but she insisted that she was okay. She was still not ready to tell the world about this affair.
After the weekend had passed with no sign of Timothy – marking a full ten days of that guy being MIA
– she finally couldn’t take it anymore.
Something had to be done. That burning longing must be quenched and if that Timmy couldn’t do it,
then someone else would have to do.
Thus she found herself at the club on a Wednesday night, lazily eyeing the crowd. There were a couple of
men who had approached her but surprisingly, it was difficult to say yes. Because as much as she wanted to
be with someone that night, she knew that there was only one person that could fill that void.
She tried thinking things through, searching for possible reasons for her uncharacteristic behavior, going
over their encounters and conversations. In the end, she couldn’t figure it out. This Timmy was a paradox.
He was someone who felt so familiar, someone whom she felt strangely connected with and attracted to
right from the start. And yet, I don’t even know his last name.
Shaking her head at that thought, she emptied her glass in one go and got ready to head to the dance floor,
finally feeling desperate and loose enough to do something.
She barely lifted her body off the stool when she felt a hand on the small of her back and hot breath on her
right ear, causing her to flinch by reflex.
“Miss me?”
Her desire to slap whoever it was that dared touch her evaporated when she heard that voice.
The hand on her back moved to the side, taking hold of her waist, and before she knew it, she had sat back
down and was leaning on Timothy, inhaling his scent.
She felt a kiss on her hair and shuddered. “I hate you,” she said, then summoned her strength to
elbow the other person away.
“Why?”
There was that smirk again and how she wished she could wipe it off his face. But her hand couldn’t even
move let alone inflict damage on that somewhat cute grin. All anger was defeated by relief and want at the
sight of him. But she wouldn’t give him the pleasure of knowing that.
Thus, she clenched her jaws, got off the stool and tried to stomp away.
She wobbled instead. The continuous shots of alcohol had finally gotten to her head but she would keep
walking away if it was the last thing she did.
A pair of arms caught her when she felt one of her heels give way.
“Let’s go.”
She tried getting out of his hold but the firm arms had wrapped themselves around her, not giving her much
room to move.
“Let’s go home, Trace.”
That short sentence stopped her squirming. Tears suddenly filled her eyes and she didn’t even know what
was going on when she spun around, fisted the parted edges of Timothy’s jacket and kissed him
passionately.
Part 4

Her head hurt the next day but not bad enough to stop her from going to work albeit half a day late.
Timothy had spent the night, that much she knew. The spot next to her was still warm when her alarm
woke her up.
She was pretty sure they did nothing because she opened her eyes to find herself tucked under the
blanket, wearing her pajamas and with her phone neatly charged on the nightstand.
The most surprising thing though, was the lone cupcake next to her phone.
She remembered Timothy’s weird question after their second meeting about her favorite dessert but didn’t
understand why that treat was there. Especially since she knew that she hadn’t given him any answer.
Timothy didn’t leave a message or an explanation – not even in the note app in her phone.
“What’s with the cupcake?”
She messaged him on the way to work.
No reply came and by the end of her day, she swore that she would really slap him the next time she saw
him.
If there was one thing she hated, it would be the push-and-pull game. Unless she was the one doing the
pushing and pulling, of course.
When someone tried to do it to her, she’d leave him before he could even blink.
She wanted to do the same to this Timmy but, like last night had miserably proven, she just couldn’t.
Pathetic, she scolded herself as she slammed her car door shut.
She was about to walk towards her gate when she noticed that silver Mercedes she had come to know
well by now.
The luxurious car door opened and out stepped Timothy.
She scoffed and walked on, ignoring him, still feeling pissed that her message was left unanswered all
day long.
She knew that the other person was following her quietly, through the gate then the front door. How she
wished she could yell at him and tell him to go away but that little, inexplicable part of her heart was
secretly happy and excited to see her Timmy again.
Sensing the eyes watching from the bedroom door, she decided to have a little fun and get the upper hand
this time. Maybe even revenge.
Forget slapping him. Let’s make him suffer a bit instead.
She dropped her bag onto the carpet, pulled her hair up in a ponytail – displaying the back of her neck on
purpose – and let it down again casually, stretching as if no one was there.
Her hands then began unbuttoning the loose top she was wearing and took it off.
She cast the shirt aside before strolling towards her walk-in closet, discarding her jeans along the way.
After she had grabbed a towel, she walked out again, expecting to see her Timmy still standing at the
door, staring at her.
But there was no one there.
“Where the he-…”
She rushed out of the bedroom to find that guy, temporarily forgetting the fact that she was only clad in her
tank top and underwear. Her irritation had reached its peak and any intention to tease Timothy had
vanished, replaced by the pure urge to inflict some physical damage to the strange guy.
“Whoa there.”
She gasped when she heard the voice and felt the arms grab her from behind.
“Don’t walk around like that. Your neighbors might see you,” whispered Timothy in her ear.
“Get off me!” She broke free then pushed Timothy back, hating the smirk with a burning passion.
Her hand trembled. That was how much she wanted to slap that smug face. “What?” Timothy
innocently asked. “You want me to go? I can go. Goodbye.”
Before Tracy could stop herself, her hands had moved to clutch Timothy by the shoulders. That playful
twinkle stared back at her and she really hated herself for being this weak.
“Fine. Go. Good riddance.”
She withdrew her hands then crossed her arms to stop them from doing things without her permission
again.
“Are you sure?” asked Timothy.
“…”
“Are you really sure?” he asked again, leaning just a little bit closer towards Tracy.
She inhaled when she saw him closing in but tried her best to appear unaffected. “Yes.”
“Okay then. See ya next week.” Timothy straightened up then took a step towards the door.
“N-next week?” Without thinking, she quickly stood between Timothy and the door, preventing the
guy from taking another step. “Why next week?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” replied Timothy, grinning from ear to ear.
“Stop playing me!” She uncrossed her arms and shoved him. “I hate this! I hate you! You’re a selfish,
pretentious person, Timmy! I wish I’ve never let you come anywhere near me!”
She was surprised to see Timothy’s shocked look and instantly felt sorry although she wasn’t sure why.
She deserved to be pissed but she forgot all about it when she saw those eyes glistening.
“Hey… Wha-…”
But before she could finish her sentence, the other guy had rushed out of the door, closing it behind
her.
Her feet began to move, going after him, but luckily she remembered what she was wearing and
made a U-turn, running back inside her room to put her pants on.
She knew that Timothy could have driven away by the time he left the house but pushed that thought aside
and kept running.
As expected, there was no one outside. The gate was closed and everything was quiet.
She exhaled and shook her head, not getting any of this.
“I’m supposed to be angry at you, I deserve to be angry at you. Not feeling guilty like this,” she muttered
under her breath as she stopped at the gate. “I definitely should not be feeling guilty like this.” Then why
do I feel like I’ve hurt him more than I intended to?
–-
She sat staring at her phone for the longest time, waiting for it to beep or ring, for any news from her
Timmy.
Since that unpleasantly confusing last encounter yesterday, she had sent him multiple messages. One
was angry, one was questioning Timothy’s whereabouts and one to apologize. None was replied.
She couldn’t focus at work and ended up rereading that note left in her phone two months ago.
“Did you find it, Tracy?” it read.
“Find what, Timmy?” she mumbled to herself. The random fun she was looking for that night, the sense
of adventure, that something new and exciting? She found it to some extent, she guessed. Her meeting
with Timothy was definitely adventurous and exciting but it didn’t feel entirely new.
It was astonishingly not completely new.
Maybe because I’ve had one night stands before?
But he’s not just a one night stand. You know that. And the things he did were different.
He’s different.
So what is he? Who is he?

Then there was that matter of the cupcake. She didn’t understand why it was left there.
The treat was still in her fridge, where she had put it before she rushed off to work.
“Damn you, Timmy!” She grabbed her bag and decided to just go home, telling her boss that she was
not feeling well.
It was Friday anyway. No one would care.
She thought about doing something to distract her mind instead of going straight home. But that thought
vanished the moment she stepped out of the elevator because right there, leaning against the tall marble
wall of the skyscraper’s lobby, was the source of all her dilemma.
Timothy turned his head when he felt the burning eyes on him and cracked a small smile when he saw
Tracy. He pushed himself off the wall and lazily sauntered towards the obviously still pissed woman.
“What are you doing here?” Tracy asked when Timothy stopped in front of her.
“I thought you wanted to see me.”
She watched him wave his phone in front of her face, teasing her.
“You were looking for me, weren’t you?” said Timothy before he put the phone back in his pocket.
She scoffed then pushed him aside. “Arrogant little son of a-…”
“Now now, swearing at work might give a bad impression to your colleagues or boss,” remarked
Timothy casually as he grabbed hold of the other woman’s hand, startling her, making her stop in her
tracks.
She looked down at the hand casually holding hers, felt her heart twist happily, but yanked her hand free
the next second without so much as a smile. She was not going to let this Timmy play her like this
anymore. She was not going to lose. Not today.
There was an amused smile on Timothy’s face as he followed the woman quietly, out of the building and
into the streets of New York.
She was perfectly aware of the person trailing behind her but pretended not to notice him at all.
Deciding to go ahead and do whatever she wanted, she made a turn towards a nearby coffee shop.
She went inside, walking up to the counter to place her order.
While waiting for her coffee, she noticed Timothy also ordering something but didn’t stick around to find
out partly thanks to the cup placed in front of her by the barista.
She took her drink and chose a corner table, the one with a small two-seat sofa.
She sat down and placed her bag next to her, making sure that Timothy couldn’t sit there even if she
wanted to.
Leaning back, she kept her eyes on the large glass window in front of her and the quiet shop,
nonchalantly observing the people passing by and other patrons around her.
She didn’t even turn her head when she sensed the other person approaching, determined to ignore him
until he apologized or at least gave her an explanation.
A plate was placed on the table in front of her and she saw yet another cupcake.
Before she could react, her bag was moved, off the cushion and onto the chair that had been pulled up
from the empty table next to them.
“Don’t-…”
She didn’t have a chance to even finish that sentence when Timothy sat down and kissed her. Just like
that. No warning. No preamble. Just one pair lips pressed upon another.
She used her free hand to push Timothy back and involuntarily blushed when she noticed several people
staring at them in shock.
She then lifted the hand off Timothy’s shoulder, ready to slap. But the other guy took hold of it before it
could swing and placed a kiss on the back of the fingers.
The gesture subdued her anger and she found herself deflating, leaning back with a sigh. “Why, Timmy?
What do you want?”
Timothy didn’t answer. Instead, he took the cup from Tracy’s other hand, placed it safely on the table and
held the now empty hand. He placed yet another kiss on the back of that hand and brushed it with his
thumb, eyes not meeting Tracy’s.
“Do you like cupcakes, Trace?”
She was taken aback by the random questioning. “Err… yes? What’s with this obsession with cupcakes?”
Timothy lifted his head, meeting Tracy’s confused frown. “I’m not obsessed with cupcakes.”
“You left one in my room yesterday. And now this,” she gestured at the plate with her chin. “What’s
with these cupcakes?”
The look that met her was the same one she saw that night on their second meeting, when she asked
Timothy his name.
That vulnerability… but just now you were so annoyingly arrogantly…
“What’s your favorite cupcake?”
“What?”
“Chocolate? Plain vanilla? Red velvet?”
“I-I… All of them are okay, I guess.” She blinked. “Seriously. What is with you and cupcakes?”
“I like red velvet cupcakes.” Timothy looked down once again, at the hands he was still holding.
“Someone used to bake me batches of them a long time ago,” he said while his thumb brushed the skin on
Tracy’s hand.
It was then that Tracy realized that the cupcake left on her nightstand was indeed red velvet cupcake.
And so was the one on the plate right now.
She found her heart aching, feeling a sudden pain and deep sadness. She wasn’t sure why. It was merely
sympathy, she figured. An emotional understanding because of the loss she somehow sensed in that tone.
Funny. Never thought it could hurt like this to understand someone’s pain. It’s like I shared the exact same
sadness, went through the same thing – whatever that thing is.
“What do you want from me, Timmy?” she finally asked, gently. “Why do you do this?”
“Why do you let me do this?” countered Timothy, lifting his head to stare intently at Tracy’s eyes
once more.
“I… I don’t know.”
She thought she was being honest and that there wasn’t really that much between them anyway so the
flash of disappointment on the other person’s face was too obvious not to notice.
“What am I supposed to say then?” she said even though Timothy’s face had returned to its impassive
state. “You won’t even tell me your real, full name. How am I supposed to give you a proper, solid
answer when you won’t even start acting normal?”
Her anger gradually returned.
“You come and go as you please. You won’t reply my messages.” She withdrew her hands from Timothy’s.
“You won’t even answer my questions like normal, regular people. How am I supposed to give you a
reason?” She shook her head, exasperated. “I don’t know why I let you do this to me. I really don’t. I wish I
knew. I really wish I knew.”
Timothy didn’t move when Tracy reached out for her coffee and sipped it quietly.
“A person can only take so much, Timmy,” she spoke again after a while, lips still against the edge of the
cup. “It’s been months and you still won’t tell me your name let alone anything else about you. I know
I’m also at fault for letting you get this far but-…”
“Timothy.”
Her head turned when she heard it. “What?”
“Timothy. My name is Timothy.”
Her eyebrows shot up in shock. As glad as she was to finally get his full name, she couldn’t help but
feel surprised. She hadn’t expected him to give in so fast and so easily after months of stubborn refusal.
“Why are you so shocked? You wanted my name, right? Well there you go. You got your second
syllable.”
“Timothy?” she repeated carefully.
The guy nodded.
“Timothy…” she mumbled to herself, once again sipping her drink.
Why does that name sound familiar? Timothy. Do I know anyone else named Timothy? I don’t think so.
There’s Tyron, Tony and Thomas… but definitely no Timothy so far. No. I’m sure I’ve never met or heard
of anyone named Timothy before so why…

“Gotta go.”
The voice interrupted her string of thoughts and she looked up to see him standing up from the sofa.
“Where are you going?”
“I’ll come by tonight,” answered Timothy before he bent down to kiss the top of Tracy’s head.
“See ya. Eat your cupcake.”
And just like that, she was left staring at the handsome guy’s back, disappearing out into the busy street.
–-
“Hello?”
“Good afternoon, Sir. It’s me, Luke.”
“What is it, Luke?”
“There’s something you need to know, Sir.”
“Did something happen?”
“No, Sir, but the person she’s seeing…” he hesitated.
“Yes?”
He took a deep breath. “It’s him. He’s back.”
Part 5

“So he’s back, huh? How did he find out?”

“I’m not sure.”
“I have a guess,” said the tall young guy. “There was that huge event with one of our global clients and
a picture of Tracy and the celebrity guests was uploaded onto news websites.”
“I thought you knew better than to let such a thing happen, Luke.”
“I was in the restroom, Sir. Besides, I’ve run out of excuses to tell the press not to publish our account
executive’s photograph. Especially when she looks like that,” the young guy defended himself.
“What’s your excuse, Sab?” the man turned back towards the only woman in the room.
“He ran. Left without a word. He just hopped on a plane one day and disappeared.”
“How did you track him down then?”
“Where else would he be? It was a guess, honestly. My first and best guess.”
The man exhaled then leaned back in his large leather chair. “So now what? They’re back together?”
“Timothy said he’d keep his part of the deal. He knew he only had a few months left,” Sab said.
“And I don’t think Tracy knows who Timothy is,” added Luke. “So basically nothing’s
changed, Sir.”
“Timothy could tell her.”
“I don’t think he would,” said Sab. “He would only hurt himself and Tracy if the latter still couldn’t
remember.”
“And even if she did remember, what good would that do if Timothy had chosen to keep his part of
the deal?” Luke chimed in.
“True. But what if he ran? What if they both ran?” he asked.
“I’m afraid there’s always that possibility but I trust Timothy.”
“He ran from you, Sab.”
“He’d eventually come back, Sir.”
He tilted his head, staring at the firm young lady with slight amusement. “I guess it’s your job to make
sure that happens, isn’t it?”

–-

She had just finished washing her hands when the doorbell rang.
After wiping her palms on the apron around her waist, she literally skipped towards the little screen
on the wall and smiled when she saw the face.
She buzzed the gate open and ran to the door, opening it before Timothy had even reached it.
Timothy raised his eyebrows but didn’t comment when he saw the bright smile welcoming him. It
wasn’t until he noticed the messy pink apron that he finally opened his mouth. “What have you
been doing?”
“You’ll see.”
She pulled Timothy’s hands, dragging him inside, straight into the kitchen.
“Ta-da!” She proudly showed Timothy the tray in the middle of the messy counter, lined with six red
velvet cupcakes in purple and pink baking cups. “I’m not sure how they taste since it’s my first
attempt and all, but I hope they’re at least edible. Found the recipe online. I haven’t tasted them after
they came out of the oven though.”
Letting go of Timothy’s hands, she picked one cupcake up and showed it to him. “Look! I even found
purple and pink cups! Cute, isn’t it? You said you liked purple and I like pink so I-…”
She almost dropped the cupcake when Timothy pounced her, hugging her tight.
“W-whoa. Timmy? Are you okay?”
“…”
“Timmy? Timothy?” She wriggled one arm free and looped it around Timothy’s shoulder, her hand
gently stroking the soft brown hair. “Hey. You okay?”
This behavior wasn’t like the cool teasing Timothy she was used to. This was more along the lines of
the fragile vulnerability she sometimes – accidentally – saw. Either way, it was quite confusing and
unexpected.
When Timothy finally released her, she got yet another shock when she saw his wet eyes. “Hey, why
are you crying? You haven’t even tasted them. Are you sure they’re going to be that bad?” she joked,
smiling.
Timothy quickly wiped his eyes. “N-nothing. Sorry.” He kissed her. “I’m sorry. I’m really really
sorry,” he whispered between kisses, against her lips.
“What for?”
Timothy didn’t answer but kept kissing her instead.
She didn’t mind the constant kisses but she was curious so she pushed him away, creating some
distance between their faces. “Why are you apologizing? Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” Timothy had regained his composure. “Thanks.” He smiled as he took the cupcake from
Tracy’s hand. “For this.” he took a bite then offered it to her. “Wow. It’s good. Try it.”
She slowly bit into the treat, chewing carefully before grinning proudly. “It is good! Not bad for my
first try, huh?”
“Not bad at all.”
Timothy took another bite then let him finish the rest.
“You can take the rest with you,” she said after she placed the now empty paper cup on the counter.
“Later.”
She almost yelped when Timothy’s hands pulled her harshly, bumping their bodies together.
“Y-yah…”
Her protest was cut short when Timothy planted his lips on her neck.
“Timmy, let me shower first. I’m all sweaty from the baking,” she coaxed him to stop but was
ignored once again as Timothy continued sucking and licking, nibbling on her flesh.
She gasped when Timothy’s hands moved and felt her body being pushed to walk
backwards, towards the bedroom.
“Please let me shower first?” she asked after Timothy had pushed her onto the bed.
“No need.” Timothy climbed on the bed on his hands and knees, hovering over Tracy.
“But I’m-…”
“You’re perfect.”
She closed her eyes when Timothy leaned down and kissed her forehead gently.
“You’re perfect, Trace.”
She heard Timothy whisper and something inside her stirred, causing her to shiver and shake so
badly that her eyes flew open while her hands shot up, clutching the front of Timothy’s jacket until
the latter flinch.
Tears suddenly surged up, blurring her vision, but she didn’t know why.
She thought this was new because she didn’t remember experiencing this that night at the club thanks
to her excessive drinking. But there was no mistaken the familiarity of the feeling and the warmth –
the inexplicable warmth spreading inside her. From her toes to the tips of her fingers to the top of her
head.
What is this feeling? Why… how… what is this?
She saw Timothy looking at her and caught a sad smile before the latter kissed her.
That night she cried, screamed and even laughed.
It was very different from all their previous encounters. Timothy was different, more relaxed
and comfortable.
She could see it in him as they lay there quietly, just staring into each other’s eyes without a single
word. Those mysterious brown orbs still sparkled but in a different way. They had a more sincere look
to them, a happier shine, she thought.
“I never knew you could be funny,” she said, tracing Timothy’s torso while never
breaking eye contact.
“I’m not a comedian by occupation but I guess it won’t hurt to make you laugh every now and then.”
“If you’re not a comedian then what do you do, exactly?”
The twinkle disappeared and she saw those eyes darkening once again as Timothy turned his head
away, avoiding her gaze.
“Still won’t tell me?” She couldn’t help but feel disappointed.
She thought they had made progress especially after her effort with the cupcakes and what just
happened. She was convinced that Timothy had definitely opened up to her so this sudden setback was
frustrating, to say the least.
“Why won’t you tell me? Why do you like being so cold mysterious one second then all warm and
nice the next? Do you enjoy torturing me that much, Timothy Harbour?” Her volume kept rising.
Timothy let out a gasp and turned his head so fast that it could have easily snapped off. “What did
you call me?” he stared at Tracy with wide round eyes, like he had seen a ghost.
“Your name. Timothy Harbour.”
“I never told you my surname.”
“Oh?” That made her frown. “Huh. Weird. Must’ve heard it somewhere. I have a friend named Tony
Harbour so my brain probably just assumed that your surname is Harbour too. Besides, it sounds okay.
It fits,” she reasoned. “Is your surname Harbour then?”
“Y-yes.”
“Wow. I’m a good guesser,” she chuckled to herself, feeling strangely proud and happy.
Timothy didn’t move though. He didn’t even blink.
“Timmy? Are you okay?” She reached out, tucking the cupping his cheeks softly. “Oh can I
just keep calling you that, by the way? It’s cuter. I like it.”
“…”
“Hey. What’s wrong?” she asked, scooting closer when Timothy seemed to have frozen in place. “I
was just asking you an honest question. Why do you torture me like this? Coming and going as you
please? Do you even know what you’ve done to me?”
Timothy shook his head. “What did I do to you?” she finally asked.
“A lot of things.” she kissed him. “You make me feel so many things I can’t even name. And to
think that I didn’t even know your full name until today… it’s crazy. That’s the only word I know
for it.”
She pushed Timothy back, moving to lie on top of him with their mouths never parting, not even for a
second.
Fingers began to glide on her skin, followed by warm palms pressing down, fondling.
She smirked into the kiss. Revenge time, Timmy.
“Wha-…” Timothy was left speechless when Tracy abruptly pried his hands off, threw them aside
and got off the bed, strolling towards the bathroom and disappeared inside it.
–-
The next morning, she woke up to find Timothy still there and smiled to herself when she saw the
sleeping face next to her.
Timothy’s brows were furrowed and he looked restless so she did what came naturally, reaching out
to soothe the creases on Timothy’s forehead.
The young guy woke up with a start and nearly jumped out of bed.
“Hey hey, calm down,” she said, catching Timothy’s wrist to stop him from leaving.
It took Timothy a few seconds to finally relax, seemingly remembering where he was and whom he
was with. He sat back down on the mattress. “What time is it?”
“I don’t know.”
“What date and day is it?”
“Um… 28th, I think? It’s Saturday, that’s for sure. Why? You have an appointment?” “N-no. I
was just… Never mind.”
She finally saw Timothy easing himself, lying down once again. “Good morning,” she said as she
moved closer and placed a kiss on the guy’s cheek.
“Good morning,” replied Timothy with the biggest, sincerest smile Tracy had ever seen.
She giggled when Timothy nuzzled his nose in her hair then playfully bit the shell of her ear. “Are
you hungry?”
“A little.”
Tracy could only sigh contentedly when Timothy trailed kisses all over her body, curling her fingers
and toes thanks to the sensation. She loved this side of Timothy so much, even more than his alluring
mystery.
“I wish you’d be like this more often,” she mumbled half consciously.
“Hm?” Timothy lifted his head after placing one final kiss on Tracy’s ankle. He then moved back
up, retracing the trail he had left earlier.
“T,” said Timothy when he reached the belly, drawing the letter with his finger on Tracy’s skin. “And.”
he drew the ampersand. “T.” he finished with the second T and a kiss.
She looked down and saw Timothy looking up at her with glistening eyes. “Thanks for the ‘and’.” Her
hands reached out, cupping Timothy’s cheeks and pulling him up, closer to her. “Are you okay?”
Timothy nodded. “How do you wish me to be?”
“Hm?”
“You said you wished I’d be like this more often. Like what, exactly?”
“This. Like you right now.” She swept Timothy’s hair back, revealing his forehead. “Not flirty, not
mysterious, not cold, not quiet and definitely not disappearing somewhere.” She gave him a quick peck,
closing her eyes. “I wish you could be here with me more. Much more,” she whispered against his lips
and felt them quiver.
“W-why?” Timothy’s voice trembled.
“Why what?” She opened her eyes and moved her head back a bit.
“Why do you want me here?” asked Timothy with round, innocent eyes.
That caught her off guard. “I thought you’ve known that from day one. You asked me whether I
liked you that much. Well yeah. I do like you that much. Very much.”
“How much?”
“Huh?”
“How much? And why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you like me that much?”
“I…” She dropped her hands from Timothy’s face. “Why are you asking me all this?” She suddenly
didn’t understand where their conversation was going. It had started out random, she thought it was
random, but now there was something definitely serious behind Timothy’s tone and words. What it
was, she didn’t know.
Timothy took a deep breath and moved aside, lying down on his back. “Never mind.”
“You say that a lot. You should know that you could talk to me about anything. I told you stuff too,
didn’t I?” she said, turning to her side while propping her head on one elbow, observing the quiet
Timothy. “My best friend Luke said that we should share and I agree.”
She saw Timothy tensing.
“Luke is your best friend? Luke Riggin?” asked Timothy carefully, turning his head to look at
Tracy.
“Err… yes? I think I’ve mentioned him a few times before. Why? You know him?” She raised her
eyebrows, unsure why Timothy’s expression suddenly changed so drastically.
“Tall, dark skin, skinny Luke Riggin?”
“So you do know him.”
“How long have you been best friends with him?”
“Um… I’m not sure. Since… college? Longer than I care to remember, that’s for sure.”
She watched Timothy sit up, looking upset somehow, so she followed suit, sitting up and placing a
hand on Timothy’s thigh. “Hey. You okay? Your mood swings are really extreme, by the way. Don’t
get me wrong, I like the different sides of you but-….”
“Can you do me a favor, Trace?” Timothy suddenly asked, looking at her.
“Sure. What is it?”
“Can you not tell your best friend about me? This? Us?”
“What? Why? We share everything.”
“Have you told him then?”
“No. Not yet but… Why, Timmy?”
Timothy reached out, holding the hand on his knee. “Because I probably have to leave if he, or
anyone, finds out.”
“Wha-… Why?!”
“That’s just the way it is.”
“That doesn’t make sense. Come on. I thought I’ve told you that I prefer the sincere side of you?
Don’t act all mysterious again, please?” She scooted closer, wrapped her arms around the other
person and leaned her chin on his shoulder. “Please, Timmy? Don’t leave?”
She didn’t even know why she was now reduced to begging. She, Tracy Price , never begged. People
begged her. Yet here she was, pleading this person she had just met a few months ago to stay.
“I won’t if you promise not to tell anyone.”
“I can’t tell anyone? Not ever?”
“One day you can tell everyone. But not now. Just… keep this between us for now. For a few more
months. That’s all I’m asking from you.”
“You won’t tell me why?”
“You’ll know.”
“When?”
“In a few months.”
“Why not tell me now?”
Timothy heaved a sigh. “Can’t you just trust me?”
“How can I trust someone who can’t even reply my messages?” She withdrew her arms and lifted his
chin. “Or who won’t even tell me about himself or who’d disappear for days without a word only to
come back and turn everything upside down again?”
The feeling of frustration returned.
“I want to trust you, Timmy. But you’re not letting me. You should know by now that I like you. A lot.
I don’t know why, considering all you’ve done to me, but I just do.”
That made Timothy smile. “Okay. I’ll reply your messages and spend as many days here as you want.
How’s that?” Timothy reached out, patting Tracy’s hand to calm her down. “I won’t leave until I have
to.”
“You won’t act all cold and mysterious again?”
“Do you want me to do that?”
“It’s fun sometimes but not all the time, please.”
“Okay.”
“You’ll stay here for as long as I want you to?”
Timothy nodded. “I’ll send you off to work every morning and wait at the door for you every afternoon
like a puppy.”
She laughed at that. “A puppy, huh? A cupcake loving puppy?” Timothy

smiled. “Yes. I’ll be whatever you want me to be.”

Part 6

“Timmy!” she called out as soon as she opened the front door.
The person sitting on the couch turned his head and smiled. “Why are you shouting like that?”
She closed the door, took off her shoes and dropped her bag onto the carpet on the way to the couch. She
literally jumped on Timothy, nearly knocking the latter’s laptop to the ground.
“Y-yah! Careful!”
“Sorry. I just miss you,” she said, wrapping her arms around Timothy and showering his face with
random kisses.
Timothy had to chuckle. “I assume your day went well?” he asked as he set the laptop aside, putting it to
sleep.
“Hm,” she mumbled absentmindedly, too busy peppering the guy with kisses.
Actually, she had had a rough day at work. One of the clients raged at her for a mistake that wasn’t even
hers in the first place. Then her boss added to that by assigning her to yet another notoriously difficult
client for an upcoming project.
All she wanted – the only thing she had on her mind all day – was to come home and let Timothy help
her forget everything. To lose herself in him like she had been doing everyday this past month, ever
since Timothy decided to stay like he said he would.
It was officially the best month in her life.
There were no awkwardness and no fights over little things that people usually had at the beginning of
sharing a living space. If she hadn’t known better, she’d say that they had been living together for years
instead of weeks.
Timothy’s habits were acceptable. Some were surprising and a bit unusual, but acceptable nonetheless.
She found them easy to adjust to.
It appeared to be the same for Timothy since the latter never complained about anything.
There was still so much she didn’t know about her new roommate. His job, where he lived, his family
details and why he could easily put his life on hold to be there with her 24/7.
But Tracy realized one day that she didn’t need to know all that for now. She was happy to have Timothy
with her. Regardless of those unknown details, Timothy had already become an inseparable part of her
life.
“Hm as in ‘yes’ or hm as in ‘not really’?” mumbled Timothy after he had pushed the eager Tracy
back a bit.
“Hm as in ‘why are we still talking about this instead of making out’?” Timothy laughed.
She smiled when she heard the chortling, always finding it as amusing and contagious as the first time
she heard it.
“I swear, you laugh at the weirdest things,” she said, tapping Timothy’s nose with her finger before
getting off him to go to the kitchen.
“Name one,” replied the guy following behind her.
“Um…” She pulled the fridge open, in search of a snack. She thought she had a list of things to name but
strangely, she couldn’t remember at least one of them. It felt as if they were there, somewhere at the back
of her mind, but she just couldn’t retrieve them.
She ended up shrugging before continuing on her search.
Little did Tracy know that the person behind her was quietly clenching his jaws, feeling happiness once
again slipping just a little further away.
–-
The phone vibrated endlessly on the nightstand, waking her up with a groan.
“Timmy…” she whined.
There was rustling and shaking of the bed before a hand shot out from under the crumpled blanket,
searching for the source of the noise.
She was about to go back to sleep once the vibrating stopped but couldn’t do so since Timothy had
sat up abruptly then rushed out of the room.
“Timmy?” she opened her eyes lazily, squinting while taking her time to fully wake up.
She heard muffled voices – Timothy talking on the phone somewhere inside the house – and lay back
down.
She had seen Timothy taking mysterious phone calls, always leaving the room in a rush when he did.
She tried asking once, but Timothy said it was just business. What kind of business, Timothy wouldn’t
tell.
As she lay there in the quiet room, staring at the ceiling, she couldn’t help but wonder why she was doing
this. It wasn’t in her nature to act this way, to let someone in so fast and to cling to that person like fish to
water.
Yet that was exactly what Timothy was to her: something she realized she couldn’t live without.
If she hadn’t known better, she’d say that Timothy was the missing piece her heart had been looking
for all this time.
She scoffed at that thought.
Wow. Sentimental much? I was looking for fun, adventure, something extraordinary.
She is extraordinary though.That may be true but why can’t she tell me more about himself? Why this wait?
Why the secrecy?

With a huff, she closed her eyes again, hoping that going back to sleep would chase those haunting
questions out of her mind.

–-

“What do you want?” hissed Timothy into the phone as he leaned against the kitchen counter, eyes on
the doorway in case Tracy walked in.
“I just wanted to check on you, Tim.”
“Then just text me. There’s no need to call.”
“You won’t reply my messages. And you know what happens if I don’t update him your status.”
“Screw him. Tell him to go screw himself.”
“Tim…”
“I’m keeping my end of the deal, isn’t that enough? He owes me, okay? He hid this from me for so damn
long. You all did!” he balled up his fist, fighting the urge to punch something.
“We were just looking out for you, Tim. We wanted to spare you.”
“Yeah. Right. I find that hard to believe.”
“But it’s the truth. We didn’t want to see you hurt.”
“Oh and this doesn’t hurt me?”
“We thought you’d never find out.”
He shook his head. “Like I said, screw you all.”
He ended the call and gripped the device so hard, its case cracked.

–-

“Timmy?” She twirled the soft brown strand around her finger once more.
“Hm?” Timothy looked up.
“I’m bored. Can we go out?”
“But it’s late.”
“So? You came to pick me up after midnight once, saying you’d take me out. Where were you planning to
take me?”
“Nowhere in particular. I thought a quiet drive somewhere might be nice. There’s this building downtown
that I have all access to. If you had agreed, we would have gone up to the roof and stargaze. If there’s any
stars left in the sky, that is.”
She almost clapped her hands in delight. “Let’s go!”
“But it’s going to be windy and cold!”
She rolled Timothy off her. “Then we’ll bring thick jackets and blankets,” she said as she got up and went
to her walk-in closet.
“Trace…” Timothy whined, not moving from the bed. “It’s warm and cozy here. Why would you want
to go out into the cold?”
“Then why did you offer? Are you backing out on your word, Timothy Harbour?” Timothy
froze at that.
She continued to change her clothes, not even realizing the other person’s reaction until she turned
around to see him still splayed on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.
“Hey,” she grumbled, coming to stand at the doorway with hands still buttoning her pants. “Timmy, go get
rea-…”
“I’m sorry.”
She heard the shaky whisper and frowned, making her way back inside the bedroom. “What?”
“Sorry for backing out on my word. I’m sorry I broke my promise.”
“What?” She sat on the bed and saw Timothy’s eyes closed but there was no mistaking the glimmer of
tears on the eyelashes. “Hey, what’s wrong?” She lay down next to him and wiped his eyes with her
thumb. “You didn’t break any promise. I was just kidding. What’s wrong, Timmy?”
“…”
There were times when Tracy wasn’t sure what Timothy was thinking, saying or doing.
This was one of those times.
She knew that there was a reason behind Timothy’s sudden appearance in her life and everything that
guy did or said towards her. But she just didn’t know what it was and she had stopped trying to figure it
out after the first two months of living together. She chose to just enjoy her time with him because she
had grown to love this puzzle of a guy.
It was beyond crazy, she knew. But she couldn’t stop her heart. It had already fallen for Timothy even
before she knew his full name – that much she now understood.
And who ever said that love needs a reason, she thought one day.
“Do you wanna stay in?” she asked.
Timothy slowly opened his eyes and more tears flowed out, trickling down the sides of his face.
“Don’t cry, Timmy,” she said against Timothy’s neck when the latter locked her in an embrace,
arms tightly wrapped around her.
“I…” Timothy swallowed his next words and chose silence.
“Hm?” She looked up at him, into the eyes that seemed to be drawing her in, conveying a thousand
things she couldn’t understand yet felt perfectly.
She knew. She knew that Timothy loved her too.
It wasn’t in her nature to say it first or out loud. She couldn’t even remember saying it to anyone this way,
meaning it with every fiber of her being and every sound that came out of her mouth. But tonight, she
wanted nothing more than to make Timothy hear those words.
She felt that Timothy should hear those words.
“I love you,” she said, and saw the eyes widening for a few short seconds before they were flooded with
tears once again.
“Hey, Timmy.” She couldn’t help but panic when the guy broke down, sobbing against her chest
uncontrollably. “Timmy, please don’t cry.”
Despite her lack of understanding of the current situation, she couldn’t stop the sadness that began to
creep into her heart as she listened to the sounds of deep sorrow and regret, flowing from the person she
always regarded as strong, enigmatic, always in control.
What happened to you, Timmy?
Her hand never stopped stroking Timothy’s hair, gently soothing him until he calmed down.
“I’m sorry,” mumbled Timothy through his hiccups afterwards.
“It’s okay.” Tracy lifted Timothy’s face by the chin then smiled, kissing the damp and messy cheek.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Timothy meekly shook his head. “I can’t.” he wiped his nose with the back of his hand.
“I want to but I can’t,” he said, looking down as if in shame.
“Okay. Don’t worry about it,” she said, in spite of the slight disappointment that always arose every
time Timothy refused to talk.
“One day you’ll understand,” Timothy spoke again, still keeping his head down.
“It’s okay. I won’t force you.” She then hesitated a bit. “Do you… um… Do you feel the same way?” she
asked shyly. She knew the answer, of course. She just wanted to hear it. A small, selfish yet hungry part of
her wanted to hear Timothy say it.
Timothy instantly looked up, meeting her gaze.
The stare was so intense that she forgot why she had to ask in the first place. It was all there, loud and
clear for her to see and feel. Right there in those eyes that had mesmerized her since the first time she
looked into them.
“I love you more than life itself.”

–-

“Timmy!” She called out after slamming the door behind her but the house was quiet.
The person who usually greeted her wasn’t there.
“Timmy?” she called out again, walking into the bedroom. “Where did he go?” she mumbled to
herself.
She was about to call Timothy when she saw a note on the nightstand.
“Have an appointment. Will be back with dinner.” “Now that’s short,” she remarked casually, placing the
note back where she found it. “At least he’ll be bringing food home.”
–-
The two people straightened up when the silver Mercedes screeched to a halt, calmly watching the
driver step out of the car.
“I still have a month!”
That was the first thing that came out of Timothy’s mouth as he stomped his way towards the two.
“We know.”
“Then what’s with the threat?” he glared at Luke.
“It’s the only way we could think of to get you out of the house,” answered the tall guy, still in a
calm tone.
“Well I’m here now, so just say what you want to say and leave me alone for the rest of the month.”
“They’re speeding things up,” said Sab.
“W-what?!”
“They’re speeding things up. You have less than a month now.”
“B-but the deal was 10 months! I got 10 months!”
“I know, Tim, but they’re speeding things up. They need to get this over with as soon as possible. You
know how dangerous it is should it get leaked.”
“Nothing is leaking.”
“Yet,” said Luke. “But a press agency just submitted an inquiry about the project. It’s gonna leak soon if
we don’t speed things up.”
“One. Month.” She lifted a finger. “I have one month left. Four weeks. Thirty days.”
“Twenty days, Tim. Three weeks, give or take.”
“W-what?!”
“Sorry, Timothy.”
He was left speechless, mouth agape and eyes wide with shock and anger.
“SCREW YOU!”
–-
“You’ve been quiet,” she said to the guy sitting across from her.
Timothy looked up from his plate and smiled at her.
It was the fakest, saddest smile she had seen from the guy.
“Did something happen?” she asked.
Timothy shook his head and put another small piece of meat in his mouth, chewing
unenthusiastically.
“Come on, you can tell me,” she said as she reached out to place her hand on Timothy’s arm.
She was worried about him. Timothy barely said three words since he came home. The guy kept
avoiding her eyes and went about setting the table in utter silence.
“Timmy,” she called again.
Timothy met her gaze and placed the spoon in his hand down on his plate. He then covered Tracy’s hand
with his own. “Do you think you can take a short leave from work? Just for one or two weeks?”
“Huh? What for?”
“Let’s go on vacation.”
“What?”
“Let’s travel Europe for a couple of weeks,” said Timothy with a weak smile. “Visit Paris, Venice…
London, maybe? You get to decide.”
She was surprised by the sudden proposal but couldn’t deny that she liked the idea of traveling with
Timothy. They barely ever went out together and Europe did offer more freedom to be themselves
when they were out.
“It’s gonna be so expensive,” she said.
“Do not worry about money. Just ask for the leave. I’ll take care of the rest.”
“When do you plan to go?”
“Next week.”
“W-what?” She withdrew her hand from Timothy’s arm. “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious,” replied Timothy. “Promise me you’ll ask for that leave?”
“I’ll… try. But if my boss doesn’t approve-…”
“Ask for at least a week and two weeks tops. That’s all.”
“Okay. I’ll see what I can do.”
She finally saw Timothy smile his usual, happy grin, even though the eyes were still gloomy and sad
somehow.
Part 7

“One more.”
She heard Timothy say as the guy pulled her close once again, readying the camera in front of their faces
before taking another picture.
“You’re seriously going to take at least two pictures of the same pose for the entire trip?” she asked as she
watched him smile while checking the result in the digital camera.
Timothy nodded. “I plan to print them out in pairs so you and I can each have one.”
“You can just print the same photo twice you know.” Timothy froze before face-palming himself.
She laughed at him, pointing her finger at the sulking face before she kissed the pouting lips. “Cute.”
She smiled when Timothy’s arms went around her, not letting her go but deepening their kiss instead.
The past week had been sheer bliss. They were finally acting like a real couple, walking around, going to
the movies, have romantic dinners, sightseeing while holding hands and take endless pictures. They could
kiss, hug and basically do anything without anyone staring at them.
Tracy knew that Timothy always had that sadness hidden behind his excited front. Sometimes she’d catch
him staring at her with tears in his eyes or hugging her a bit longer than he should.
She didn’t mind a single thing that Timothy did. She just wished that the sadness would go away.
Timothy still wouldn’t tell her anything so she stopped asking. She figured that it’d eventually
come out when Timothy felt the time was right.
“I love you,” whispered Timothy against her lips after the kiss ended. “Please don’t ever forget that for
as long as you live.”
She opened her eyes. “Hey, don’t talk like that.”
There was something in Timothy’s words and tone that alerted her, evoking a subtle yet unsettling fear
inside, and she didn’t like that at all. “Don’t say that.”
Timothy merely smiled, took Tracy’s hand in his and resumed walking.

–-

“Trace, can you do me a favor?”

She turned her head, observing the side profile of the person she had grown to love so
much in such a short span of time. “Sure. What is it?”
Timothy kept his eyes on the dark water, dotted with the yellow reflection from the lights from the
buildings across the river. “Forgive me?”
“What? Forgive you?”
Timothy nodded.
“But you’ve done nothing wrong.”
She watched Timothy’s lips curve into a sad smile and finally met the pair of sad eyes when Timothy
turned his head.
“I have. I made a very big mistake.”
She heard him say.
“What? When?”
“A long time ago.”
“What?” She wasn’t getting any of this.
“You’ll understand one day. For now, can you do me that favor?”
She furrowed her brows. “Well, yeah, I guess I can but I don’t get it.”
Timothy merely smiled and kissed Tracy’s forehead. “Thank you for the best months of my life.”

–-

She crashed on the bed the moment they arrived back at her house, exhausted and jet lagged since she
couldn’t sleep on the plane. She was glad that Timothy had kept her company during the entire flight:
talking, watch in-flight movies with nonsensical commentaries, play random silly games; basically doing
anything to make sure she wasn’t bored.
But her body could only take so much. She could barely keep her eyes open when Timothy tucked
her in after taking her jacket and shoes off for her.
She remembered mumbling a thank you as Timothy kissed her forehead, right before she fell asleep.
“Trace…”
She vaguely heard the whisper, slowly bringing her out of her slumber.
“Trace…”
She heard it again and tried opening her eyes, turning her head to where the voice was coming from.
After blinking and squinting, her brain was finally working well enough for her to recognize
Timothy’s face smiling at her.
“What?” she mumbled drowsily, eyes dangerously coming to a close once again.
“I love you. Promise me you’ll remember that for the rest of your life?”
She frowned then forced her eyes open. “What?”
“Promise me?”
She nodded half consciously.
A kiss landed on her forehead, travelling down to her nose, cheeks and finally arriving at her lips.
“Remember that favor you said you’d do. Forgive me, okay?”
She felt more awake now so she tried to push herself up. “What are you talking about, Timmy?”
Instead of answering, Timothy only smiled then cupped Tracy’s face, kissing her for what felt like
forever before he finally let go.
“I have to go,” Timothy said. “Don’t wait up, okay? Go back to sleep.”
“Where are you going?”
“There’s an appointment I have to keep.”
Timothy slowly withdrew his hands and Tracy could see the tears flowing down Timothy’s face.
“Timmy…” She reached out to wipe the tears. “Why are you crying again?”
Timothy smiled, held Tracy’s hand then kissed it. “I’ll see you.” he let go, wiped his face then got up.
“Timmy.”
She rolled off the bed with a groan, taking a second to get herself together before she walked out of
the room, going after Timothy.
“Timmy!”
Timothy sped up, running out of the house without another word or even a glance behind him.
“Yah! Timmy! Slow down!”
She was fully awake now but by the time she reached the gate, Timothy had gotten inside his car and
driven away.
“What is wrong with him?” she muttered under her breath as she watched the silver sedan disappearing
around the corner.

–-

Timothy stepped out of the car, wiping his face once again, trying to look as calm as he could in front of
the tall woman.
“Tim…”
“Don’t, Sab. Just don’t,” he said as he took hold of the door handle and pulled it open to get inside the car.
Sab didn’t say another word, slipping into the driver’s seat instead and began driving.
Timothy kept his eyes on the window, half hiding his endless tears and half trying to imprint everything
that had happened these past months in his memory even though he knew it was futile.
When they had finally arrived at the small airstrip, he took out a small envelope and a flash drive from
his pocket and handed it over to Sab.
“One last favor I’ll ever ask of you,” he said. “Give the envelope to her and check the flash drive.”
“Tim…”
“It’s not gonna affect any of this nor will it get you in trouble. You’ll see. Just do it. Please?”
Sab took a deep breath and nodded. She understood Timothy’s pain. “I’m sorry, Tim.”
“So am I, Sab-ah.” Timothy reached up, patting the young woman’s cheek. “So am I.” he sadly smiled.
“Well, see ya.”
–-
She couldn’t go back to sleep after seeing Timothy run off like that. She tried calling but Timothy’s
phone was switched off. Her messages were left undelivered and she had a sinking feeling, a fear that
grew worse as every minute passed.
By sunrise, she couldn’t take it anymore and was planning to go out in search of Timothy but realized that
she couldn’t. She wouldn’t know where to look. She knew nothing about Timothy.
Feeling more desperate than she had ever felt in her entire life, she painfully waited for the sun to set before
she grabbed her car keys and drove to the club. She stayed there from opening until closing time but there
was no sign of Timothy.
She tried again the next day and the day after that, but Timothy was nowhere to be found and his phone
was never switched on.
The last drop finally came one night, after nearly a week of neglecting everything in her search of the
other guy, when she came home to an empty house. She could still see Timothy sitting on the couch,
smiling at her. She could hear his laugh echoing through every room.
But in reality, all that greeted her was dark empty silence.
Tracy found herself crying on the mat, right inside the door, finally feeling everything crumbling down.
She knew that Timothy was gone and it hurt. It hurt so much that she ended up wailing like a child on
the floor.
She had just found him and now she had to be without him.
“Did you find it, Tracy?”
She gasped when she remembered that question and finally realized what it meant.

“I did. I found it. I found you, Timmy. Why did you have to leave?”

–-

Luke looked up when the envelope was thrown onto the empty space next to him, only to see his
friend in the second worst state he had ever seen her in.
“What’s this?” he asked, taking the small rectangular paper in his hand after setting his iPad aside.
Tracy said nothing. She just sat on the other end of the bench, next to Luke, crossing her arms,
waiting.
The tall young guy opened the envelope and read the short handwritten note. He smiled despite
everything, recognizing the handwriting very well.
“Ask Luke. She’ll tell you everything,” it read.
“Well, I guess it’s indeed okay to tell you now,” Luke said.
“…”
Luke calmly returned the note to Tracy then reached for his bag, taking out a brown envelope. “These are
all that Sab and I could salvage. We did it without anyone knowing. If they had found out, I wouldn’t be
here right now. Heck, I’ve had this with me since forever and every day it felt like carrying a ticking time
bomb.” he slid the envelope towards his friend.
Tracy hesitated then slowly took it, opening it cautiously. She pulled out faded polaroids, handwritten
letters and something that looked like a recipe.
Her eyes widened when she recognized the people in the polaroids.
They were all pictures of her and Timothy – a younger version of them.
But she didn’t, she couldn’t, remember taking any of these pictures.
“What is this? Did someone photoshop this?” she asked Luke furiously. She then read the letters and
her eyes nearly fell out of their sockets.
They were love letters. Some were addressed to her from Timothy, while others were written by her
for Timothy.
“Wha-…”
She gasped when she saw the recipe. It was for red velvet cupcakes, written neatly in faded pink ink,
in her handwriting.
“You met Timothy in college,” began Luke. “Both of you were brilliant. So brilliant that you were
recruited by the government to help assist our strongest ally in a secret project.”
Tracy looked up from the paper in her hand and stared at Luke as if he was out of her mind. “What the
heck are you talking about?”
“The project was meant to strengthen our defenses against the North, to equip our intelligence and that of
the US at the same time. It was something straight out of a science
fiction movie,” continued Luke in the same calm tone.
“…”
“I don’t exactly know when you two fell in love,” said Luke with a smile. “You were always together from
the first time I met you and as time went by, I had experienced first hand how strong your bond was.”
The tall guy paused, inhaling. “I can’t tell you the details but the project involved tinkering with human
memory. The plan was to be able to reprogram spies and use them to infiltrate their own country.”
“What?”
“Yeah. Cool, huh?” Luke’s smile turned sad. “That’s how brilliant you two were.”
“I’m an account executive, Luke. And you’re the regional manager’s secretary,” said Tracy.
“I’ll get to that later. Anyway, you two did better than expected and one day even made a significant
breakthrough. Apparently, the programming could be done selectively too. You could erase or insert a
certain memory and leave the rest intact.”
Tracy’s jaw dropped, finding this more ridiculous by the second.
Luke kept going, ignoring his friend’s reaction. “Unfortunately, they didn’t allow you to test it because the
project was under scrutiny for horrible side effects. Several test subjects got their memory back but didn’t
forget the new ones so they clashed, causing these people to gradually lose their grip on reality. Others
began hallucinating, seeing things that weren’t there. It was considered too risky to continue with the
project so everything was put on hold.”
Luke took another deep breath of air. “This happened right when you guys made that discovery. Needless to
say, Timothy wasn’t happy. He tried to get them to test it just once. He tried to convince them that he had
also fixed the problem with the unforeseen side effect,” he said. “Unfortunately, it was a no go. They
wanted to shut the project down. So one day, without anyone approving, you two secretly did the test on
your own. You, Trace, were the test subject.”
“W-what?!”
Luke nodded. “I didn’t exactly know how it went since my technical knowledge is very limited but just as
the procedure began, some of those test subjects I mentioned went berserk. They were being transported to
a local mental hospital but somehow, a few got loose and began attacking the nurses and caretakers. A
huge riot ensued and, in the chaos, machines were destroyed, chemicals were spilled and fire began to
spread through the facility. I’m telling you, it looked exactly like one of those Hollywood movies. We
were going to go into automatic shutdown so we needed to get out of there.”
Heaving a sigh, Luke shook his head before solemnly continuing his story. “Timothy didn’t want to leave
you still unconscious at the table like that. But we made him. We literally grabbed him and carried him out
of there, screaming and crying for you.”
“In truth, we also managed to get you out of there but your memory…” Luke gulped.
“When you came to, you recognized some of us but not everyone. What’s worse, you didn’t
recognize Timothy when we showed you his picture.”
Tracy had her brows furrowed, trying hard to dig inside her mind to prove all this or to refute it. She
couldn’t remember any of it. There was no such event in her memory, no prior encounter with Timothy
before she saw him outside the club that night.
“We knew it would break Timothy’s heart if he knew that you couldn’t remember him so we told him that
you died, that we couldn’t save you,” explained Luke regretfully.
“It broke Timothy. He blamed himself. He almost went crazy at one point and we had to move him to
London, get him treated, to calm him down. After all, he was an asset to us no matter how degrading that
sounds. It’s politics. The higher ups thought it’d be best to keep him. Well, it finally worked. He seemed
to have accepted your fake death and went back to work for us from London, under strict supervision,”
said the tall guy.
“What happened to me then? Why can’t I remember any of this? You said there were people I
recognized. If that was true then I could have at least remembered being in a hospital or something,
couldn’t I?” asked Tracy.
“True but since your memory loss was a mess, to put it mildly, we took a chance and reprogrammed
everything using the new and improved method Timothy had indeed discovered.”
“W-what?! You messed with my brain?!”
“Sshh!” Luke put a finger to his lips. Although they were alone in that area of the park, he still didn’t
feel comfortable discussing everything too loudly. “We didn’t mess with your brain. We put the pieces
back together, leaving the ones there intact and inserting the ones you lost – for as much as we know.”
“Then why didn’t you put Timothy back in there?”
“We couldn’t restore anything related to your work for us. It’s highly confidential. And unfortunately,
that includes Timothy. Besides, we thought it would be best for him not to know that you were alive. We
couldn’t risk another breakdown from him.”
Tracy covered her face with her palms, unsure what to make of this craziness.
“Fast forward to last year. Remember that huge event where your picture was uploaded to news websites?
Timothy saw it. He immediately flew here, running off without telling anyone. In search of you,”
continued Luke.
“Then why did he leave again? He found me, didn’t he?” Tracy asked, taking her hands off her face.
“He had to leave. Not long before he saw your picture, the decision was made to shut down the project for
good. It was deemed too risky and dangerous – not to mention expensive. And thus, everything about it
must be destroyed. The documents and test subjects were gotten rid of quietly and easily. Yet there’s one
thing that’s hardest to erase.”
“Let me guess, the knowledge inside the staff’s brain? Timothy’s brain?” Luke
nodded.
“So what now? You plan to use that memory-programmer-whatever on him?!”
“On every civilian ever involved in the project, to be exact,” said Luke. “But it took time to carefully
reprogram and monitor every person so Timothy had agreed to be the last to go, in exchange for a new life
here, back in New York. He said he needed time to properly say goodbye to his memories of you anyway
so he didn’t mind the wait.”
“So the few months he said we had-…”
“Yeah. He had to keep his word and fly back to the States.”
“B-but… Wait. So what was he doing? Was he trying to make me remember him?”
“No.” Luke reached out for his tablet then handed it over to Tracy. “He wrote this to me and Sab. You can
read it.”
Tracy took the tablet and read the document.

“I feel like I owe you an explanation, Luke. You too, Sab. First of all, I know you were just doing your job
so I hope you could forgive me for yelling at you so much. You know how I get when it comes to her.
If anyone, including him, asks, I wasn’t trying to jeopardize the program or anything related to it. I
wasn’t planning on telling Trace anything about our past.
I just wanted to see her. But when I did, I got greedy. I still love her. I will forever love her, you know that,
right? Well, to see her right there within arms reach… what can I say? I lost it. I wanted her. Even if only
for a few months. Even if she couldn’t remember me, or us, I don’t care.
I found the file you hid from me, by the way. Her file. She could remember some things but she couldn’t
remember me. That hurt so much. But I blame myself.
I was probably too boring for her. Or too clingy? I don’t know. She once said that I was too
predictable. I told you that, didn’t I, Sab? And how much it pissed me off. Well, maybe those were the
reasons why I was so easily forgettable. Or so I thought.
In any case, I decided to be different. I wanted her to remember me this time. Although I couldn’t help
bringing up the cupcake. It was our thing, you know.
It worked, at first. But I guess the program was flawed after all, because she still unconsciously
remembered things.
She called me Timmy! That felt like heaven right there. I ran out of her house and cried for almost an hour
in the car.
Then she broke down twice when I called her ‘Trace’ and said the exact same words I once said to her
during some of our most memorable moments together. She even remembered that cheesy ‘T and T’ you two
used to hate so much.
She had also proven me wrong. She told me that she liked the real me better than the mysterious,
cool and suave me I tried to become.
Maybe she forgot me not because of who I was or what I did after all.
Anyway, we got to see Europe like we once said we would. And I got to hear her say ‘I love you’
again. You don’t know how happy that made me.
Please take care of her, Luke? I owe her the best years of my life. I love her more than life itself. Please
make sure she’s happy?
And should we meet again one day, all of us, any of us… please say hello? Befriend me again? I love
you two no matter how many times I’ve yelled at you.
Well, that’s all I have to say for myself. Tell him I’m sorry for running off like that and thank you for not
taking her away from me for the second time – thank you for the second chance. And for always keeping
an eye on my Trace.
Until we meet again, friends. Thank you.”

Tracy couldn’t stop crying when she read it. She hated the fact that she couldn’t remember how they were
but at the same time, she was glad that they had a second chance albeit short.
“So it’s true? That crap you just told me is true?” she asked through her sniffing.
“I’m afraid so. I’m not just the regional manager’s secretary, Tracy,” said Luke gently. “I’m assigned to
keep an eye on you for a few more years, to make sure you’re okay.”
“And to make sure none of the top secret information reappeared in my mind?”
Luke merely smiled.
“Who is this Sab?” asked Tracy.
“She’s assigned to Timothy.”
Tracy took a few minutes to calm down before asking her next question. “Why are you telling me all this
now?”
“My boss said that it was okay to tell you should you ask. I think he had predicted that Timothy would want
to explain things to you somehow. The project’s gone. All traces of it are gone. What’s left is hearsay,
rumor, speculations and conspiracy theories. Nothing could be proven so I’m free to tell you all this.”
“And should I decide to tell anyone, no one would believe me anyway?”
“Yeah.”
Tracy took a deep breath then returned the tablet to Luke. “Can I have a copy of that letter?”
“Sure. I’ll email it to you.” Luke tapped his tablet while letting Tracy digest everything quietly.
Tracy kept staring at the polaroids and letters. She finally noticed a heart drawn on the bottom of one of
the papers with a ‘T and T’ in the middle of it. Her heart ached again.
She felt guilty for forgetting Timothy, guilty for not realizing who Timothy was. She could only imagine the
pain Timothy felt and, suddenly, she knew that she was going to be able
to experience it herself soon.
“Luke…”
“Hm?” Luke looked up from his tablet.
“Where’s Timothy now?”
The tall guy smiled. “I knew you’d ask me that.” he reached into his bag and took out another, thicker,
envelope. “He told Sab to print these out and mail it to you next month. But since I’m meeting you now,
you can have it a month early.”
Tracy took the envelope and checked its contents. She inhaled sharply when she saw the pictures from
their trip to Europe.
“There’s also a note in there. She told Sab to print that one out too,” added Luke.
Tracy searched for the paper and found it at the bottom of the pile.
“Thank you for loving me. I hope you could forgive me. I will forever love you. Remember that for as long
as you live, okay? And please say hi should we ever meet again.”
Tracy bit her lip, suppressing another round of tears. “Where is he, Luke?”
“You’ll have to wait a few mo-…”
“Where. Is. he?”

–-

He was looking for a change of scenery, something new or different. It was why he had decided to work
at the café instead of at home.
And yet as he watched the passersby through the large window, with his laptop on the table and his
work half done, he realized that there was nothing new or different about his day thus far.
Ironic, because usually what he had with his now would be enough to cheer him up. There was calm jazz
music flowing through his earphones, his favorite coffee, his laptop, pencil and sketchpad, and not many
people around.
He had prepared everything yet nothing could suppress that feeling anymore. It all seemed vain,
empty. Almost as empty as his heart.
With a silent exhale, he gathered his stuff and decided to just go home. The café is closing anyway, he
thought before leaving the small establishment, waving to the waiter who greeted him, “Good night, Mr.
Harbour. Get home safely.”
He was a regular so every waiter there knew him.
Pulling his jacket closer to ward off the chilly night wind, he was about to hail a cab when he noticed
someone standing alone at the curb.
A woman with long jet-black hair.
Pretty side profile, he noted absentmindedly.
He was about to turn his head in the opposite direction when the corner of his eye caught movements.
His eyebrows went up in question, observing this girl until the latter turned her head and their eyes met.
He wasn’t one to blatantly stare at strangers like this but those brown eyes captivated her. There was a glint
to them that he found warm and familiar. A look that he felt like he had seen somewhere before although he
wasn’t sure where. Not in the people he was close with like family or friends, and definitely not in his exes
because he didn’t have many of those to begin with.
He wondered whether that woman found him just as strange, especially since neither of them seemed to
want to look away.
The thought had barely left his mind when he saw her extending her hand out into the street.
He sensed bright lights coming up from behind him and turned around to see a cab pulling over right in
front of the girl.
The door was pulled open but the stranger didn’t go in. She kept her eyes on him, and after what felt like
ten minutes, the stranger’s lips finally moved.
“Do you want to share?”
Epilogue

“What’s your favorite dessert?” she asked the guy lying under her.
“Huh?” Timothy’s eyes flew open. “Dessert?”
“Yes.” She kissed the surprised guy’s lips then moved to the corner of his mouth then to his cheek, leaving
smaller pecks on his jawline and ended up at his ear. She blew the shell and felt him squirm.
“W-why so random?” asked Timothy.
“I like cupcakes,” she whispered then flicked Timothy’s earlobe with her tongue, grinning to herself when
she heard a suppressed groan.
She couldn’t believe how shy Timothy was. It was nothing like the confident, mysterious person she met
that night outside the club.
She had asked Luke, and even Sab whom Timothy had introduced as his closest sister-slash-friend.
“That’s how he really is. That’s the Timothy we had gotten to know before it all happened,”
answered Luke.
“He’s, by nature, a timid and kind yet witty person. A bit dorky at times but definitely not flirty, rough or a
player,” added Sab.
Her heart broke when she heard that, realizing how bad it must have been for Timothy to change; and to
have to force himself to change again when he thought that the love of his life didn’t like his true self and
thus had forgotten him.
Since then, she had been trying to somehow make up for what happened even though she knew Timothy
would never realize it.
She didn’t care. She just wanted Timothy to feel her love. She wanted to show him how much she loved
who he was.
However, unlike their second time together, this third time went much slower.
They did end up in Timothy’s bed after that meeting outside the café but after that, Timothy freaked out
a bit and asked Tracy to take it slow. He said he wanted to keep seeing Tracy but he didn’t want it to just
be about sex.
Besides being unexpectedly shy, Timothy was also quite busy with his job at the university research
center so inevitably, they couldn’t spend as much time together as Tracy wished.
But Tracy would never stop trying nor would she leave. She would do anything Timothy ask of her to make
sure they stayed together this time.
“C-cupcakes?” stuttered Timothy when Tracy’s hand glided lower.
“Mmhmm. Red velvet cupcakes,” she whispered after she had released the flesh she had been nibbling on
and changed position, propping herself up with both arms by the sides of Timothy’s head, trapping the guy
under her.
“O-oh. That sounds delicious,” said Timothy, looking up at the eyes that he always considered
mesmerizing since the first time he looked into them that night outside of the café; that night when he
uncharacteristically went against his logic and took up the unknown woman’s offer to share a cab.
“I’ll bake you a batch tomorrow.” She then dove down to recapture Timothy’s lips.
Timothy’s hands hesitantly moved, landing ever so gently on Tracy’s backside, afraid to fully press his
palms on the skin.
She chuckled, broke the kiss and clicked her tongue jokingly when she felt the reluctant touch. “Timmy,
I’m disappointed.”
“Why?” asked the guy, eyes wide and sincere.
“You should know by now that you can do anything you want with me. That I’m all yours,” she said
as she resumed kissing him. “And that I’ll be anything you want me to be.”
“Anything?” mumbled Timothy into the kiss.
She released the meek guy’s lips. “Anything.” She gave him a smile and another gentle peck. “Don’t ever
change, okay? I love you just the way you are.”
Timothy’s eyes went round with shock, his mouth opening and closing without being able to make a sound.
“Y-you love me?” he finally managed to say.
Tears suddenly filled Timothy’s eyes and he looked confused by his own reaction although it
didn’t stop him from grabbing Tracy, kissing her passionately.
Tracy knew what was going through Timothy. It had happened to her as well.
There were triggers, unconscious little things that evoked unknown emotions.
Timothy cried when he first heard Tracy call her ‘Timmy’ although he didn’t know why. He had also
timidly asked Tracy, with burning cheeks, whether the latter had had a lot of experience in the bedroom.
Because he had never been with anyone who could elicit such reactions from him, or give him such
pleasure from the very first time.
Furthermore, Timothy was also very amazed to find himself very knowledgeable in that area despite his
lack of dating experience when he saw and heard Tracy scream, moan, squirm and basically just
ecstatically enjoying everything he did to her.
Other, smaller, triggers were less visible although Tracy could sense them. She had experienced
them herself, after all.
The way Timothy knew his way around Tracy’s house even though he never recalled being there before.
That time Timothy mentioned how he thought going to Europe together, on vacation, would be fun.
How Timothy sometimes – and suddenly – froze, frowned or looked confused when they were talking or
doing something together.
Tracy understood everything although she never said anything about it.
At the beginning, she had tried interrogating Luke and Sab for as much as she could about Timothy. So she
could get a better understanding of who Timothy was before and what she should do to best accommodate
him. But in the end, she decided to forget everything and start over, to get to know each other from scratch.
To start an entirely new life with Timothy. Create new memories. Happy memories.
“Don’t cry, Timmy,” she said, breaking the kiss to wipe the wet face.
“I love you too, Trace” Timothy said as he held Tracy’s hand and kissed it.
She smiled to herself when she heard Timothy call her that for the first time. Judging from Timothy’s
action, Tracy was sure that the teary guy didn’t even realize what he had just done.
“This might sound crazy since we’ve only been together for a few months but I love you very much. I
love you more than life itself,” continued Timothy.
She smiled when she heard that, recognizing the heartfelt words that never seemed to change no matter
how many times they had to restart everything. “Thank you.” She then moved off Timothy and settled
herself next to him, head on Timothy’s shoulder.
Her finger traced Timothy’s belly, drawing two Ts.
It wasn’t done to test Timothy. It was just something she unconsciously did because now she felt whole
and happy again.
“Where’s the ‘and’?” Timothy suddenly asked.
“Huh?” She looked up and saw him smiling at her with that twinkle in his eyes. Those same twinkling
eyes she remembered seeing in the stranger that had asked her to share a cab that night outside the club.
She almost gasped.
That look… do you remember, Timmy? Is it possible for you to remember at least this one thing?
“Timothy and Tracy. T and T. It sounds nicer than just T T or two Ts, right?” said Timothy as he
laid a gentle kiss on Tracy’s head.
“Yeah.” she smiled at him. “It does. It definitely does.”
“I think I have an answer to your question now,” mumbled Timothy into Tracy’s hair.
She looked up. “Did you find it, Timmy?”
Timothy smiled. “I did. I found it. I found you.”