Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children

Author(s): SOL R. RAPPAPORT

Source: Family Law Quarterly, Vol. 47, No. 3 (Fall 2013), pp. 353-377
Published by: American Bar Association
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Deconstructing the Impact of
Divorce on Children

SOL R. RAPPAPORT*

I. Introduction

Through the news media, religious organizations, and talk shows,

American culture has convinced us that divorce has short-term and long
term negative effects on children. To suggest otherwise may create dis
comfort. Nobel Prize winner Daniel Kahneman described limitations in
thinking when he wrote that we have an "excessive confidence in what we
believe we know and our apparent inability to acknowledge the full extent
of our ignorance."1 Cognitive dissonance theory suggests that if we hold
a belief but are presented with information that contradicts that belief, we
must remove the discomfort we feel by either altering our belief system or
ignoring the new information. But what if the new information is accu
rate? What if divorce is not the main culprit in why some children have
difficulty postdivorce?
There is a significant amount of research on the impact of divorce on
children. Since the 1970s, there has been a tremendous increase in studies
focusing on children's adjustment to divorce. A search of the American
Psychological Association's PsycNET, a database of journal articles, dis
sertations, books and book chapters, yielded 203 publications using the
keywords divorce, adjustment, and children from 1980 to 1989, 239
between 1990, and 1999, and 125 from 2000 to 2009. In contrast, in the
1970s there were only twenty-five citations. Most of the early studies had
methodological flaws, which calls their results into question.2 Some flaws

* Clinical and forensic psychologist and partner in Counseling Connections, a group

private practice in Libertyville, Illinois. The author wishes to thank Dr. Bud Dale and Dr.
Jonathan Gould for their helpful comments on earlier drafts of this article.
1. Daniel Kahneman, Thinking Fast and Slow 14 (2011).
2. Richard A. Kulka & Helen Weingarten, The Long-Term Effects of Parental Divorce in
Childhood on Adjustment, 35 J. Soc. Issues 50, 51 (1979).

353

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354 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

led to inaccurate conclusions being drawn from the studies.3 For example,
many studies in connection with single parents do not distinguish between
families where there was a single parent due to divorce or where there was
a single parent due to death.4 Over the last few decades, researchers have
used more advanced methodologies and statistical procedures.5 The
advancement in methodologies6 and statistical analyses,7 combined with
the proliferation of research, has led to a more accurate understanding of
our knowledge of the impact of divorce on children.
Because many attorneys and judges have a limited understanding of the
scientific method,8 they have trouble evaluating whether research is of a
high quality or not. This limited understanding can lead to acceptance of
research results as fact, without a proper analysis of the underlying
methodology. Without knowledge about science, distinguishing fact from
advocacy becomes more difficult.9 A greater understanding of the process
of scientific research can lead to a more thorough understanding of how
to evaluate the quality of research and the conclusions drawn from the
studies.10
The purpose of this article is three-fold. The first goal is to help attor
neys and judges gain a greater understanding of scientific research by
addressing problems in earlier studies. Attorneys will be better able to
assess research as it may apply to individual fact patterns. Second, current
trends in the research will be presented regarding the impact of divorce on
children. Science-based conclusions about the impact of divorce on chil
dren have changed over time. Specifically, it is argued that it is not the
divorce itself that causes significant emotional difficulties post-divorce,
but five other factors that may be present concurrent with divorce. Third,
3. Paul R. Amato, Life-Span Adjustment of Children to Their Parents' Divorce, 4 Future
of Children 143,144 (1994).
4. See Kulka & Weingarten, supra note 2 (reviewing problems associated with several
studies).
5. See John W. Creswell, How Sage Has Shaped Research Methods: A 40-Year
History 16 (2009) (describing the progression of the advancement of research methodologies
over several decades).
6. See Amato, supra note 3, at 145 (providing a description of changes in methodology,
including the use of meta-analysis). See also E. Mavis Hetherington & Margaret Stanley
Hagan, The Adjustment of Children with Divorced Parents: A Risk and Resiliency Perspective,
40 J. Child Psychol. & Psychiatry 129,130 (1999) (describing methodological flaws of early
studies and advantages of recent studies).
7. See Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6 (describing the use of cluster analysis
and structural equation modeling).
8. Sophia Gatowksi et al., Asking the Gatekeepers: A National Survey of Judges on
Judging Expert Evidence in a Port-Daubert World, 25 Law & Human Beh. 433,454 (2001).
9. David L. Faigman, Legal Alchemy: The Use and Misuse of Science in the Law 54,
194 (1999). See also Robert F. Kelly & Sarah H. Ramsey, Assessing Social Science Studies:
Eleven Tips for Judges and Lawyers, 40 Fam. L.Q. 367 (2006).
10. C. R. Kothari, Research Methodology: Research Techniques 10 (2d ed. 1990).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 355

recommendations for attorneys and judges will be provided, including

changes in the legal process that may be used to decrease the negative
impact of divorce and its aftermath.

II. Better Research Design and Analysis,

More Trustworthy Conclusions
The conventional wisdom is that divorce has a severe negative impact
on children. This belief is prevalent and likely based on research con
ducted decades ago when many researchers concluded children were sig
nificantly harmed by divorce.11 E. Mavis Hetherington, a noted
researcher, stated that most researchers viewed the single-parent family as
pathogenic.12 This was at a time when researchers used less advanced
methodologies. Many early studies had methodological flaws.13 Some of
the studies were qualitative in nature,14 meaning children or their parents,
usually their mothers, were asked how they felt about the divorce or how
their children were coping with the divorce, but there was no quantifiable
measurement of the children's responses. Based upon these qualitative
answers, researchers concluded that divorce causes significant harm to
children.15 In addition to being difficult to replicate, these methodologies
relied heavily upon the accuracy of the parent's reports of their children's
difficulties, which may not be accurate representations of their prob
lems.16 Other researchers used quantitative rather than qualitative meth

11. E. Mavis Hetherington, Divorce: A Child's Perspective, 34 Am. Psychol. 851 (1979);
Judith S. Wallerstein & Joan B. Kelly, The Effects of Parental Divorce: Experiences of the
Child in Early Latency, 46 Am. J. Orthopsychiatry 31 (1976); Lawrence A. Kurdek & Albert
E. Siesky, Jr., An Interview Study of Parents' Perceptions of Their Children's Reactions and
Adjustments to Divorce, 3 J. Divorce 5 (1979); Arthur D. Sororsky, The Psychological Effects
of Divorce on Adolescents, 12 Adolescence 123, 134 (1977); Judith S. Wallerstein & Joan B.
Kelly, The Effects of Parental Divorce: Experiences of the Child in Later Latency, 46 Am. J.
Orthopsychiatry 20 (1976).
12. Hetherington, supra note 11, at 857.
13. See David H. Demo & Alan C. Acock, The Impact of Divorce on Children, 50 J.
Marriage & Fam. 619, 640 (1988) (describing limitations of prior research).
14. Kurdek & Siesky, Jr., supra note 11, at 6; Rhona Rosen, Some Crucial Issues
Concerning Children of Divorce, 3 (2) J. Divorce 19, 20 (1979); Wallerstein & Kelly, supra
note 11.
15. Wallerstein & Kelly, supra note 11. Judith S. Wallerstein & Joan B. Kelly, The Effects
of Parental Divorce: Experiences of the Preschool Child, 14 J. Am. Acad. Child Psychiatry
600,615 (1975).
16. See Berthold Berg & Robert Kelly, The Measured Self-Esteem of Children from Broken,
Rejected, and Accepted Families, 2 J. Divorce 363, 367 (1979) (discussing how parents of
divorced children may identify their children as having difficulties in order to get help for them
selves when the child may have no more difficulties than they did an at earlier point in time);
See also Carolyn Moore Newberger et al., Mothers of Sexually Abused Children: Trauma and
Repair in Longitudinal Perspective, 63 Am. J. Orthopsychiatry 92 (1993) (finding that there
was a significant discrepancy between mothers' reports of their children's symptoms and direct

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356 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

ods. These researchers compared children from divorced parents to chil

dren from married parents on a variety of behavioral and emotional meas
ures.17 These measures assessed features such as acting out problems,18
depression19 and self-esteem.20 While this methodology may be more
trustworthy than the qualitative method previously described, there were
limits to some of the analyses and research designs.21 Some of these early
studies did not take into account preexisting functioning of the children22
or control for other variables, such as socioeconomic status,23 that may
better explain why children of divorce showed more behavioral or emo
tional problems following the divorce than children in intact families.
Other studies used divorced families where a significant proportion of the
parents had serious psychological difficulties.24
Judith Wallerstein, one of the most well-known researchers and writers
on the impact of divorce on children, presents a good example of how the
field began to look beyond divorce as the cause for children's adjustment
problems. Wallerstein, using data from a study that began in 1971, sug
gested that there are long-lasting, serious problems for children of
divorced families.25 Several researchers, however, have found significant
flaws in her research design and interpretation that have led to her con
clusions being challenged.26 Wallerstein and Lewis's 2004 study, based
on forty-five families, has been described as stating the outcomes for chil

assessment of the children's functioning). See also Paul R. Amato, Reconciling Divergent
Perspectives: Judith Wallerstein, Quantitative Family Research and Children of Divorce, 52
Fam. Rel. 332, 333 (2003).
17. Andrew J. Cherlin et al, Longitudinal Studies of Effects of Divorce on Children in Great
Britain and the United States, 252 Am. Assoc. Advancement Set. 1386, 1387 (1991); K.
Alison Clarke-Stewart et al., Effects of Parental Separation and Divorce on Very Young
Children, 14 J. Fam. Psychol. 304, 310 (2000).
18. Alison Clarke-Stewart et al., supra note 17.
19. E. Mavis Hetherington, An Overview of the Virginia Longitudinal Study of Divorce and
Remarriage with a Focus on Early Adolescence, 1 J. Fam. Psychol. 39, 41 (1993).
20. Id:, Ingunn Storksen et al., Adolescents with a Childhood Experience of Parental
Divorce: A Longitudinal Study of Mental Health and Adjustment, 28 J. Adol. 725, 730 (2005).
22. See Amato, supra note 3, at 143 (reviewing problems with methodology); See Demo &
Acock, supra note 13, (describing methodological problems).
22. See Kula & Weingarten, supra note 2 (assessing premorbid functioning not done).
23. Id:, Rosen, supra note 14, at 19.
24. Judith S. Wallerstein & Joan B. Kelly, Effects of Divorce on the Visiting Father-Child
Relationship, 137 Am. J. Psychiatry 1534,1535 (1980).
25. Wallerstein & Kelly, supra note 15; Judith S. Wallerstein & Julia M. Lewis, The
Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: Report of a 25-Year Study, 21 Psychoanal. Psychol. 353, 367
(2004).
26. Amato, supra note 16, at 332; Andrew J. Cherlin, Going to Extremes: Family Structure,
Children's Well-Being and Social Science, 36 Demography 421, 423 (1999); Robert M.
Gordon, The Doom and Gloom of Divorce Research: Comment on Wallerstein and Lewis
(2004) 22 Psychoanal. Psychol. 450,451 (2005).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 357

dren of divorce as "doom and gloom." Wallerstein and Lewis attributed the
subsequent psychological problems in the children to the divorce, rather
than to the psychopathology of the parents, the trauma of the parenting, or
the conflict in the marriage.27 There are alternative hypothesis for why the
children from divorced families in their study showed more difficulties
than children whose parents did not divorce. A significant proportion of the
parents in Wallerstein's study had serious psychological problems at the
start of her study. Furthermore, there was no comparison group.28
Judges and attorneys need to be aware that a researcher's values and
conceptualizations about divorce impact research design.29 Much of the lit
erature on the impact of divorce on children appears biased and "ideologi
cally driven" towards focusing on the negative impact on children.30 Much
of the early research assumed that a two-parent family is necessary for suc
cessful socialization and that divorce is a traumatic event.31 If researchers
see divorce as a disaster for children, then their measurement strategies
may be biased toward this conclusion.32 Many researchers focus on the
negative impact of divorce on children and do not assess for strengths.33
Thus, assumptions or beliefs of the researchers about divorce impact their
research design, the questions posed, and the assessments used.
Over time, researchers have used more advanced analyses and research
designs when comparing children from intact families to children from
families where the parents divorced.34 Modern designs create data that
lead to more reliable analyses, resulting in more trustworthy conclusions.
Researchers began to better statistically control for factors that in prior
research were often not considered.35 For example, some earlier studies
concluded that divorce caused children to have higher rates of emotional
and behavioral problems, but failed to take into account the impact of high
levels of parental conflict.36 When parental conflict was statistically con
27. Gordon, supra note 26.
28. Amato, supra note 16, at 333.
29. Korrel W. Kanoy & Jo Lynn Cunningham, Consensus or Confusion in Research on
Children and Divorce: Conceptual and Methodological Issues, 7 J. Divorce 45, 46 (1984).
30. Demo & Acock, supra note 13, at 627.
31. Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6.
32. Kanoy & Cunningham, supra note 29, at 48.
33. Elaine Blechman, Are Children with One Parent at Psychological Risk? A
Methodological Review, 44 J. Marriage & Fam. 179,189 (1982).
34. See Amato, supra note 3, at 144 (discussing meta-analysis); See Hetherington &
Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6 (discussing the use of cluster analysis and structural equation mod
eling in recent research).
35. See Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6 (describing recent studies addressing
mediating and moderating variables).
36. See Demo & Acock, supra note 13, at 619; See Judith Desimone-Luis et al., Children
of Separation and Divorce: Factors Influencing Adjustment, 3 J. Divorce 37 (1979) (control
ling of parental conflict not conducted).

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358 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

trolled in studies, it became clear that much of the negative impact of the
divorce on children was a result of parental conflict, or other factors,
rather than the divorce itself.37 Yet, even when a factor is statistically con
trolled, or when matched controls are used (e.g., a family of divorce is
matched financially with an intact family, with the idea being that one can
conclude differences are not in part due to financial issues), it does not
mean that this factor can be entirely ruled out.38 While these advances in
design are an improvement over previous research designs, they are not
infallible.
Researchers may now find different results because of changes in soci
ety. Divorce has become more socially acceptable, and children may feel
less stigmatized. This, combined with it being easier to obtain help from
others in similar situations, may contribute to children's being less affect
ed by divorce now than in the past. With divorce being easier to obtain
now than in the past, it is likely that couples who divorced several decades
ago had more significant problems and conflict than do many divorcing
families today.39 Some of the earlier studies may have found children to
have more significant problems, in part, related to problems with research
design and, in part, related to differences in society when those studies
were conducted.
Attorneys and judges need to understand that how researchers design
and implement their study impacts the results and conclusions drawn from
their data. This requires an evaluation of the methodology the researchers
used before accepting the conclusions drawn. To assess whether conclu
sions of research are trustworthy, one must analyze the research design.40
Methodology in research design and analysis will continue to evolve over
time. As researchers have improved their methodologies over the past few
decades, the result has been a better understanding of the impact of
divorce on children.

37. See Paul R. Amato, The Consequences of Divorce for Adults and Children, 62 J.
Marriage & Fam. 1269 (2000); See Joan B. Kelly & Robert E. Emery, Children's Adjustment
Following Divorce: Risk and Resilience Perspectives, 52 Fam. Rel. 352 (2003).
38. Blechman, supra note 33, at 181.
39. Amato, supra note 3, at 149 (discussing that as divorce became more common, adults'
attitudes toward divorce are more accepting and, as a result, children feel less stigmatized. In
addition, the social and legal barriers to divorce were greater in the past and, thus, those who
divorced decades ago likely had more serious problems and higher conflict prior to separation.
Also, divorce was likely more acrimonious prior to no-fault divorces being allowed. As a result,
children of divorced parents may have been exposed to more problematic family systems than
many are today).
40. Kothari, supra note 10.

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 359

III. The Impact of Divorce on Children

Trends in the research suggest that several conclusions can be drawn
regarding the impact of divorce on children. First, divorce and the changes
associated with it are stressful to parents and children.41 If the stressors are
not compounded by ongoing or new stressors, children are able to cope and
adapt.42 Recent researchers report that initially children of divorced fami
lies do have more emotional and behavioral problems than children from
high-conflict, nondivorced families43 This is a function of stress related to
the initial divorce.44 As the stressors decrease and children adjust to the
changes in their lives, however, children's difficulties decrease. In fact, as
children adjust to the divorce, they do better as compared to children of
high-conflict, nondivorced families.45 When divorce involves a move that
lowers stress, these children appear as well adjusted as children in intact
families, who were not subjected to high levels of conflict, and they appear
better in some areas than children in high-conflict families where the par
ents remain married.46 Current trends in the research supports the notion
that divorce causes an increase in stress with a short-term negative impact
on children's functioning.47 This does not mean, however, that children
will have long-term psychological difficulties.
Second, while children may be impacted long-term by divorce,48 much
of the literature suggests that most children do not have long-term psy
chological difficulties49 and most children adjust and cope reasonably
well.50 In fact, most children of divorce are not distinguishable from their
peers whose parents did not divorce in regard to behavioral and emotion
al difficulties.51 Only 25% of children whose parents divorce have serious
long-term problems in adulthood (10% of children whose parents remain
married have long-term problems).52 Thus, 75% of children of divorce do
not have more emotional or behavioral problems than most peers from

41. Amato, supra note 3, at 147; Kelly & Emery, supra note 37.
42. Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6.
43. Id. (reviewing studies showing this effect).
44. Amato, supra note 37; Paul R. Amato, Research on Divorce: Continuing Trends and
New Developments, 72 J. Marriage & Fam. 650,656 (2010).
45. Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6, at 133.
46. See Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, supra note 6 (summarizing the research supporting
this).
47. See Amato, supra note 37 (reviewing the research on stress and divorce).
48. Kelly & Emery, supra note 37, at 359.
49. Id. at 357 (summarizing studies indicating that most children of divorced parents are not
different from their peers whose parents remained married).
50. Eileen Mavis Hetherington & John Kelly, For Better or For Worse: Divorce
Reconsidered 149 (2003).
51. See Kelly & Emery, supra note 37, at 352 (summarizing research on impact of divorce).
52. Hetherington & Kelly, supra note 50, at 150.

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360 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

nondivorced families. Of the 25% who do have difficulties, it is argued

that their difficulties are not solely due to divorce, but rather to factors
associated with the divorce. One study found that children whose parents
divorced were at risk for having problems post-divorce, but that by age
twenty-three, there was not much difference between them as compared
to other adults whose parents remained married.53 Specifically, 11% of
children whose parents divorced scored in the clinical range for mental
health problems at age twenty-three, whereas only 8% of children scored
in this range whose parents remained married; overall, a fairly small dif
ference. This suggests that children of parents who divorced do not have
a much higher frequency of mental health problems than their nondi
vorced counterparts. Overall, the majority of children of divorce fall in the
normal range on measures of psychological and cognitive functioning.54
Third, while children of divorce do not necessarily have more long
term psychological difficulties than children from nondivorced families, it
does not mean that they are not impacted by the divorce. Two researchers
state that, "painful memories and experiences may be a lasting residue of
the divorce."55 They add that, "it is important to distinguish pain or dis
tress about parental divorce from longer term psychological symptoms or
pathology. Clearly, divorce can create lingering feelings of sadness, long
ing, worry, and regret that coexist with competent psychological and
social functioning."56 Some authors have compared this to children who
lose a parent.57 Children who lose a parent may feel they missed out by
not having a parent available to them, but it does not mean they will grow
up with serious psychological difficulties. Many college students reported
painful memories and feelings about their parents' divorce, but also
reported having few psychological symptoms.58 Not having psychological
difficulties as a result of divorce does not mean that children are not

impacted by the divorce long-term. While most college students cope well
with divorce, it does not mean that they do not feel their childhood was
the same as their nondivorced peers.
Five factors have emerged to explain much of the variance in children's

53. P. Lindsay Chase-Lansdale et al., The Long-Term Effects of Parental Divorce on the
Mental Health of Young Adults: A Developmental Perspective, 66 Child Dev. 1614 (1995).
54. See Mary F. Whiteside & Betsy Jane Becker, Parental Factors and the Young Child's
Postdivorce Adjustment: A Meta-analysis with Implications for Parenting Arrangements, 14 J.
Fam. Psychol. 5 (2000) (reviewing prior studies and using meta-analysis of prior studies to
draw conclusions); Lisa Laumann-Billings & Robert E. Emery, Distress Among Young Adults
from Divorced Families, 14 J. Fam. Psychol. 671, 678 (2000).
55. Kelly & Emery, supra note 37, at 359.
56. Id.
57. See Amato, supra note 3, at 144 (reviewing research and discussing the impact of
parental death on children and its similarities to divorce).
58. Laumann-Billings & Emery, supra note 54.

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 361

adjustment to divorce. After coping with the initial stress of the divorce,
these five factors account for why some children have significant difficul
ty postdivorce. The divorce itself is not what causes long-term psycho
logical difficulties for some children. Four of the five factors are associat
ed with the divorce, while the fifth factor has to do with the individual dif
ferences of the children. The first factor is the level of conflict between the
parents, the children's exposure to the conflict, and the children's percep
tion of the parents' resolution of the conflict. The next factor is the men
tal health of the parents. The third factor is the involvement of the non
main caregiver. Fourth is the financial impact divorce has on the family.
The fifth factor is the children's own perception or appraisal of external
events. Two different children may appraise their parents' arguing differ
ently, and, as a result, respond to their parents' behavior differently.59 The
remainder of this section will focus on these five factors.

A. Parental Conflict
One of the most studied areas of divorce is the impact of parental con
flict on children. It is well documented that when children witness
parental conflict, it increases the likelihood of a child's having post
divorce adjustment issues.60 The more intense the conflict between the
parents, the more likely children are to have internalized (e.g., depression)
and externalized (e.g., acting out) problems.61 There also is evidence,
however, that it is not just witnessing conflict between parents, but being
put in the middle of the conflict that causes harm. Children whose parents
put them in the middle of ongoing unresolved conflict face an increased
risk of difficulties postdivorce. Research shows that the type of conflict,
the child's level of exposure to it, and whether the child is the focus of the
conflict affects a child's postdivorce adjustment. Marital conflict that
focuses on the child is more predictive of childhood adjustment problems
as compared to intense conflict that is not focused on the child.62 More

59. See E. Mark Cummings & Patrick T. Davies, Marital Conflict and Children:
An Emotional Security Perspective 1 (2011) (reviewing research and describing the impact
of children's appraisal of events).
60. See Marsha Kline Pruett et al., Family and Legal Indicators of Child Adjustment to
Divorce Among Families with Young Children, 17 J. Fam. Psychol. 169, 176 (2003) (review
ing the studies showing the impact of conflict and their results from the current study support
this).
61. See Cummings & Davies, supra note 59 (reviewing prior studies). See also Patrick T.
Davies & E. Mark Cummings, Marital Conflict and Child Adjustment: An Emotional Security
Hypothesis, 116 Psychol. Bull. 387 (1994) (reviewing eleven studies on the impact of marital
conflict).
62. Joan B. Kelly, Children's Adjustment in Conflicted Marriage and Divorce: A Decade
Review of Research, 39 J. Am. Acad. Child & Adol. Psychiatry 963 (2000). Id. (reviewing
research on the impact of conflict focused on children).

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362 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

recent research indicates that it is not just the conflict the children wit
ness or are in the middle of, but also how parents resolve their conflict.63
Children whose parents argue but can resolve the conflict positively do
better than children whose parents do not resolve the conflict well.64
Also, children's perceptions matter, irrespective of the actual conflict the
children witness.65 While parental conflict can account for many of the
postdivorce adjustment difficulties, it is not an entirely straightforward
construct.

Parental conflict also tends to be associated with other problems. For

example, parental conflict can be a precursor to poorer parent-child rela
tionships and, after divorce, is associated with less discipline.66 Intense
and persistent marital conflict undermines parenting, and hostile parent
ing styles can lead to more social, emotional, and behavioral problems in
children and adolescents.67 One study found that parental acceptance and
discipline were most affected by high levels of conflict. This association
was stronger for middle childhood children and adolescents than younger
children.68

One researcher reported on a number of studies comparing mothers in

low-conflict marriages to mothers in high-conflict marriages.69 Mothers in
high-conflict marriages were less empathie and warm to their children,
were less affectionate, were harsher and more coercive in their discipline,
and were more rejecting. In high-conflict marriages, fathers were more
likely to withdraw from parenting and from their children. Fathers' inter
actions with their kids tended to be more intrusive and insensitive. Also,
levels of interparental conflict have been found to be associated with
parental depression. Higher levels of interparental conflict may result in
increased parental depression, which, in turn, may negatively impact the
children.70 Interparental conflict that results in parental depression may

63. See Cummings & Da vies, supra note 59 (reviewing prior studies).
64. Id. (reviewing prior studies and explaining their results).
65. See id.
66. See Kelly, supra note 62, at 963 (reviewing research on the impact of conflict focused
on children and mediating variables).
67. See Joan B. Kelly, Risk and Protective Factors Associated with Child and Adolescent
Adjustment Following Separation and Divorce in Parenting Plan Evaluations: Applied
Research for the Family Court 49 (Kuehnle & Drozd eds., 2012) (reviewing research on the
impact of conflict on parents' functioning and its relationship to child outcomes).
68. Ambika Krishnakumar & Cheryl Buehler, Interparental Conflict and Parenting
Behaviors: A Metal-analytic Review, 49 Fam. Rel. 25, 30 (2000).
69. See Kelly, supra note 67 (reviewing research on the impact of conflict on parents' func
tioning and its relationship to child outcomes).
70. Katherine H. Shelton & Gordon T. Harold, Interparental Conflict, Negative Parenting,
and Children's Adjustment: Bridging Links Between Parents' Depression and Children's
Psychological Distress, 22 J. Fam. Psychol. 712, 720 (2008).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 363

limit a parent's ability to be responsive to the children.

The research is mixed as to the type of problems that result from high
levels of conflict. Studies have found varying effects of parental conflict
post-divorce on children. One study found that exposure to nonviolent
interparental conflict increased the likelihood of a young adult having
post-divorce problems related to depression and alcohol abuse, even after
controlling for demographic factors.71 Other studies have found some dif
ferential effects based on the child's age and gender,72 but there are not
consistent findings in this area. It also is likely that there are a number of
variables that impact how conflict may affect boys and girls differently,
as well as older and younger children. For example, Amato and Rezac
hypothesized that children's contact with nonresident fathers would
decrease child behavior problems when interparental conflict is low, but
would increase the behavior problems when conflict is high.73 Their
results gave support to this hypothesis for boys, but not for girls. Another
study found that parental warmth postdivorce had a positive impact on
reducing the incidence of a child's externalizing problems. However, the
relationship between mother and child warmth and the child's internaliz
ing problems varied as a function of parental conflict and the warmth
between the child and the other parent.74 Thus, research findings are at
times inconsistent because various moderating variables are used in dif
ferent studies. A variety of factors impact children beyond interparental
conflict, including a child's own appraisal of the conflict.75 Some studies
take some of these related issues into account, while others do not and
reach different conclusions. This leads to an apparent inconsistency that
does not exist. For example, if a study controls for parental conflict and
finds that children of divorced parents do not differ from children of mar
ried parents, and another study does not control for parental conflict and
finds that children of divorce have more behavioral problems than chil
dren of married parents, it may appear that there is conflicting research.
Paying close attention to the methodology will help clarify apparent
inconsistencies. In fact, these types of studies show the complexity of
how children are impacted by factors related to the divorce and not just

71. Heather A. Turner & Kathleen Kopiec, Exposure to Interparental Conflict and
Psychological Disorder Among Young Adults, 27 J. Fam. Issues 131 (2006).
72. See Krishnakumar & Buehler, supra note 68 (reviewing prior research and summariz
ing their meta-analytic results); Paul R. Amato & Sandra J. Rezac, Contact with Nonresident
Parents, Interparental Conflict, and Children's Behavior, 15 J. Fam. Issues 191, 203 (1994).
73. Amato & Rezac, supra note 72.
74. Irwin Sandler et al., Effects of Father and Mother Parenting on Children's Mental
Health in High- and Low-Conflict Divorces, 46 Fam. Cr. Rev. 282, 291 (2008).
75. See Cummings & Da vies, supra note 59 (reviewing the influence and impact of chil
dren's perceptions of parental behavior).

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364 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

the divorce itself. It also demonstrates the need for future research to

continue to decipher all of the different variables that impact children

post-divorce and how much each contributes to post-divorce adjustment.
It is not just direct conflict post-divorce that creates problems for chil
dren. Some studies have found that marital conflict predivorce is a better
predictor of post-divorce adjustment than post-divorce conflict.76 Overall,
there is a high level of consistency in the finding that parental conflict pre
and post-divorce that puts the children in the middle increases the likeli
hood that a child will have post-divorce adjustment difficulties. Research
has shown that exposure to high levels of parental conflict negatively
impacts children's internalized and externalized behaviors,77 shame,78
social skills, and distress.79 One can conclude that as the level of conflict
that children witness (pre- and post-divorce) and their involvement in the
conflict increases, there is an increased likelihood of post-divorce inter
nalized and externalized adjustment problems.

B. Parent's Mental Health/Parenting Style

A second consistent finding in the research, and one that helps explain
why children whose parents divorce may have more difficulties than par
ents who remain married, is related to their mental health and parenting
style. Divorce is stressful80 and parents often find they have less support
immediately following the divorce.81 They are adjusting to the changes
that have occurred. Parents often have to redevelop a sense of who they
are and learn to balance work, family, and social needs in a new manner.
Some parents may be returning to the work force for the first time in years,
while others find they need to work more to pay the bills. Parents who are
angry about the divorce, the change in their lifestyle, and are stressed and
overwhelmed, are more likely to have difficulty parenting their children
and monitoring them.82

76. Alan Booth & Paul R. Amato, Parental Predivorce Relations and Offspring
Postdivorce Well-Being, 63 J. Marriage & Fam. 197, 210 (2006); Marsha Kline Pruett et al.,
The Long Shadow of Marital Conflict: A Model of Children's Postdivorce Adjustment, 53 J.
Marriage & Fam. 297, 305 (1991).
77. Cheryl Buehler et al., Interparental Conflict Styles and Youth Problem Behaviors: A
Two-Sample Replication Study, 60 J. Marriage & Fam. 119, 125 (1998).
78. John H. Grych & Frank D. Fincham, Children's Appraisals of Marital Conflict: Initial
Investigations of the Cognitive-Contextual Framework, 64 Child Dev. 215, 227 (1993).
79. See Davies & Cummings, supra note 61 (reviewing the impact of conflict on children's
distress).
80. Hetherington, supra note 19.
81. Amato, supra note 37, at 1272.
82. E. Mavis Hetherington, Presidential Address: Families, Lies and Videotapes, 1 J. Res.
Adolescence 32, 3233 (1991).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 365

During the first two years post-divorce, parents may have deterioration
in their parenting which can negatively impact their children.83 One
researcher found that one year post-divorce mothers were more inconsis
tent in their discipline than nondivorced mothers. Given that studies often
include children whose parents have divorced in the past two years, it is
not surprising that children of divorce are reported to have more difficul
ties than children whose parents remain married. Furthermore, it is vital
to note that most studies are cross-sectional in nature, which means that
one cannot assume causality.84 That is, the results are typically correla
tional in nature, showing an association between factors, but that does not
mean they are causally linked.
Children whose parents have authoritative parenting styles, character
ized by warmth, supportiveness, and appropriate limit-setting and control,
have fewer difficulties than children of parents with an authoritarian or
permissive parenting style. Parents' parenting style post-divorce is relat
ed to child outcomes. For example, one study found in its meta-analysis
that authoritative parenting was positively associated with children's aca
demic success and negatively related to externalized and internalized
problems.85 One year later, other researchers also published results of a
meta-analysis showing that authoritative parenting styles for fathers were
associated with better child functioning.86 Parenting style and parenting
skills are clearly risk factors or buffers that can impact how children cope
with divorce. Others found that parents of to-be-divorced families, that is,
families not yet divorced, but eventually divorced, had more difficulties in
child-care practices before the divorce than parents who did not divorce.87
One study states that parents who divorce may have more difficulty in
their relationships with their children because marital discord may distract
parents, as well as cause them to be preoccupied and less emotionally
available to their children.88 Conversely, others found mothers who
encouraged their children's academic skills helped mediate the negative
impact of family transitions and that, generally, effective parenting medi
ated the impact of family transitions on children's emotional adjustment

83. See E. Mavis Hetherington et al., What Matters? What Does Not? Five Perspectives on
the Association Between Marital Transitions and Children's Adjustment, 53 Am. Psychol. 167
(1998).
84. See Amato, supra note 3.
85. Paul R. Amato & Joan G. Gilbreth, Nonresident Fathers and Children's Well-Being: A
Meta-analysis, 61 J. Marriage & Fam. 557, 568 (1999).
86. Whiteside & Becker, supra note 54, at 21.
87. Daniel S. Shaw et al., Parental Functioning and Children's Adjustment in Families of
Divorce: A Prospective Study, 21 J. Abnormal Child Psychol. 119, 131 (1993).
88. Paul R. Amato & Alan Booth, A Prospective Study of Divorce and Parent-Child
Relationships, 58 J. Marriage & Fam. 356, 363 (1996).

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 366 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

and acting out behavior.89 Part of the reason for some children having
more problems after the divorce may be related to their parents' style of
parenting, pre- and post-divorce. At the same time, good parenting prac
tices can help moderate some of the potential negative impact of divorce
related issues.

A parent's mental health, particularly for mothers, has been shown to

be related to the children's functioning. It has been well documented that
maternal depression is linked to increases in children's internalized and
externalized problem behaviors.90 One of the reasons mothers are often
studied is because they are often the main caregivers for children. This
does not mean that paternal depressive features do not impact children.
Both paternal and maternal depression has been linked with negative
childhood outcomes. However, the reason for the negative impact may be
different for mothers than fathers. There is evidence that maternal depres
sive symptoms affect children's internalized symptoms through problem
atic parenting, whereas paternal depressive symptoms contribute to
parental negativity, which contributes to maternal negative parenting. The
end result is that parental depression can increase in child internalizing
problems.91 While it is clear that children whose parents are depressed are
at risk for increased problems, those problem may be related to depressed
mothers' difficulties in parenting. This same study also found that a
father's negative parenting impacted children's asthma activity. While
mothers' depressive features impact children, fathers' behaviors impact
them as well, although it may not always be in the same manner.
As described above, parents with mental health problems often demon
strate poorer parenting. It is not the diagnosis that causes the problems,
but the impact the disorder has upon parenting. One study found that
maternal psychological symptoms were the best predictor of negative
changes in the mother-child relationship.92 Interestingly, this study found
that the best predictor of a negative change in the father-child relationship
was parental conflict. The results showed that negative changes in each
parent's relationship with their child was predictive of greater externaliz
ing and internalizing problems in young children. A subsequent study

89. Charles R. Martinez, Jr., & Marion S. Forgatch, Adjusting to Change: Linking Family
Structure Transitions with Parenting and Boys' Adjustment, 16 J. Fam. Psychol. 107, 115
(2002).
90. See Kristin Turney, Chronic and Proximate Depression Among Mothers: Implications
for Child Weil-Being, 73 J. Marriage & Fam. 149, 150 (2011) (reviewing research on the
impact of maternal depression on children).
91. Jung Ha Lim et al., Effects of Paternal and Maternal Depressive Symptoms on Child
Internalizing Symptoms and Asthma Disease Activity: Mediation by Interparental Negativity
and Parenting, 25 J. Fam. Psychol. 137, 144 (2011).
92. Pruett et al., supra note 60, at 176.

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 367

found that higher levels of paternal and maternal depression were associ
ated not only with marital conflict, but also with less parental warmth,
more psychological control in parenting, and higher levels of externalized
and internalized symptoms.93
Children whose parents divorce are at an increased risk for problematic
behaviors. The divorce itself, however, does not cause these difficulties;
rather, factors related to the divorce account for these outcomes.
Interparental conflict, as well as parenting styles and mental health can
negatively impact children. In summary, a parent's mental health impacts
children. The research suggests that problems in a mother's mental health
have a greater negative impact on children than their father's mental
health. This is likely because most studies include children that primarily
reside with their mother and, thus, are exposed to their mother and her
problems more. It is likely that, in families where fathers are the main care
giver for the children, it would be fathers' mental health that would have a
greater negative influence on children than their mothers' mental health. At
the same time, it is clear that parents' mental health impacts children as a
result of deterioration in parenting and exposure of children to conflict and
these issues impact how involved the children are with their parents. The
mental health of the parents is one of the main factors that impacts children
directly and indirectly post-divorce.

C. Father Involvement

Father involvement with his children post-divorce is one of the more

heavily researched areas in the past two decades.94 Father involvement,
rather than mother involvement, is often a focus of research since most
children post-divorce live primarily with their mothers and questions
frequently focus on how much to involve the nonresidential parent. If
society was different and most children lived with their fathers post
divorce, then understanding the impact of mother's involvement would
likely be a main focus. The importance of father involvement is not meant
to suggest or minimize the important role of the mother. Rather, there is a
great deal of research on how children function post-divorce when they
live primarily with their mother. Because this is still the standard in our
society, it is not typically considered a separate topic. On the other hand,
father involvement is. Unfortunately, early research often had poor

93. E. Mark Cummings et al., Towards a Family Process Model of Maternal and Paternal
Depressive Symptoms: Exploring Multiple Relations with Child and Family Functioning, 46 J.
Child Psychol. Psychiatry 479,482 (2005).
94. Robert D. Harris, A Meta-analysis on Father Involvement and Early Childhood Social
Emotional Development (2010), steinhardt.nyu.edu/opus/issues/2010/spring/father_childhood_
development.

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368 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

research designs and did not differentiate well between different types of
father involvement.95 For example, early studies did not differentiate well
between the effects of different amounts of father involvement. Some
studies simply assessed children's adjustment and sought to determine
how it correlated with frequency of visits without considering length of
visits.96 A father who saw his children three times each week, even if it
was just for dinner, was considered to have more visits and to be more
involved than a father who saw his children one to two times each week,
but each time included one to two overnight stays. Early studies failing to
adequately define father involvement make the results of these studies less
useful and trustworthy.
Recent studies have improved research designs. These studies have
done a better job of defining parenting time in a manner that is more con
sistent with a parent's actual involvement. Researchers have increased
their controlling of other variables, such as parental conflict and parental
mental health. These changes have led to recent studies being of higher
quality with results that can be more readily understood and applied.
These studies have found the amount and type of father involvement can
have a significant impact upon children post-divorce. Overall, the studies
show that when fathers are actively engaged with their children in a pos
itive manner and have sufficient time with them post-divorce, children are
likely to do better.97
Two questions are often asked regarding father involvement. Does the
amount of time matter? Or, is it the quality of the parent-child relationship
and paternal parenting? The answers are yes and yes. While some studies
have found that the amount of time is not related to childhood outcome,98
other studies indicate it is.99 When the studies are viewed as a whole, the
following conclusions can be drawn: First, without an adequate amount of
parenting time, it is difficult to develop and maintain a positive parent
child relationship. Parenting time is a necessary, but not sufficient, condi
tion related to adjustment for children post-divorce. Second, if adequate
parenting time is given and fathers are actively involved in their children's

95. See William F. Fabricius et al., Custody and Parenting Time: Links to Family
Relationships and Weil-Being After Divorce, in The Role of the Father in Child
Development 201 (Lamb ed., 5th ed. 2010).
96. See Joan B. Kelly, Children's Living Arrangements Following Separation and Divorce:
Insights from Empirical and Clinical Research, 46 Fam. Process 35, 44 (2006) (describing
problems with using frequency of parenting time, rather than amount of parenting time, to deter
mine parental involvement).
97. See Fabricius et al., supra note 95 (reviewing research on the impact of parental
involvement for children).
98. Amato & Gilbreth, supra note 85, at 557.
99. See Fabricius et al., supra note 95 (reviewing meta-analysis by Amato and other studies).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 369

lives in a positive manner, this may ameliorate some of the possible neg
ative effects found in children post-divorce.
Fathers who are actively involved with their children post-divorce have
children who are more likely to flourish in a variety of ways. A meta
analysis of sixty-three studies found that children who had a positive and
close relationship with their fathers benefitted from this relationship.
Specifically, when fathers were actively involved by helping with home
work, school projects, and providing authoritative parenting, children did
better, not just emotionally and behaviorally, but also academically when
compared to children whose fathers were not as involved.100 Another
recent study found that adolescents with weak ties to their mothers
showed fewer externalizing problems and were less likely to act out at
school if they had strong ties to their nonresident father than if they had
weak ties to both parents.101 There is a strong basis to argue that if a non
resident parent can provide authoritative parenting and is actively
involved in their children's lives, it helps children adjust post-divorce.
This does not mean that every child will benefit from having a more
involved father. Abusive and/or neglectful fathers that exhibit significant
deficits in parenting may not help children do better post-divorce and, in
fact, may contribute to their children having more problems post-divorce.
Children and adolescents frequently report wanting to be actively
involved with their fathers. One early study found the majority of children
reported the loss of involvement of the nonresident parent was the most
negative aspect of the divorce.102 More recent studies report similar find
ings. In an assessment of over 800 college students approximately ten
years after the divorce, researchers found many wished they had more
time with their fathers.103 Seventy percent said they would have preferred
an equal time schedule. Also of interest, 93% of children who had a
shared-parenting arrangement indicated it was the best for them. Three
years later, data showed that as children increased their feelings of close
ness with their father post-divorce (which was also associated with their
increased time with them), there was no decrease in their feelings of close
ness to their mother.104 As their time with their father increased up to 50%,
there was a decrease in their level of anger toward their father.
Interestingly, there was no relationship between these changes and their

100. Amato & Gilbreth, supra note 85, at 569.

101. Valarie King & Juliana M. Sobolewski, Nonresident Fathers' Contributions to
Adolescent Weil-Being, 68 J. Marriage & Fam. 537 (2006).
102. See Kelly, supra note 96, at 43 (reviewing studies supporting this claim).
103. William V. Fabricius & Jeff A. Hall, Young Adults' Perspectives on Divorce Living
Arrangements, 38 Fam. & Conciliation Cts. Rev. 446 (2000).
104. William V. Fabricius, Listening to Children of Divorce: New Findings that Diverge
from Wallerstein, Lewis, and Blakeslee, 52 Fam. Rel. 385, 389 (2003).

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370 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

level of anger toward their mother. As children spent more time with their
father and were less angry toward them, there was no increase in anger
toward their mother. Overall, when a parent has a child living with them
most of the time, increasing the parenting time for the other parent up to
50% is not related to any risk of harm to the first parent's relationship with
their child. In fact, increasing the less involved parent's parenting time is
correlated with improvements in that parent's relationship with the child
with no change in the residential parent's relationship with the child.105
Finally, research indicates that when fathers are more involved with
their children, they are more consistent in providing financial support to
their children. The reasons for this connection are unclear. It may be that
parents who pay more support are more likely to be involved with their
children, or that those parents who are more involved are more willing to
pay support. There may also be some unknown other factor that might
explain the association.106 Increasing children's finances has other benefits
to them besides more money.

D. The Financial Impact of Divorce and Its Effect on Children

When parents divorce, they are forced to create two households with
often no change in income. There are two mortgages or rent payments,
two sets of electric, gas, cable and water bills. Inevitably, many intact
families find it hard to survive on two incomes. Thus, the increased finan
cial pressures of supporting two separate households postdivorce (plus
paying legal bills) adds to parental stress. One study found that in
America approximately 55% of separated or divorced women with chil
dren under the age of six live below the poverty line.107 A more recent
study found that approximately one fifth (21.5%) of custodial mothers
who divorced in the prior twelve months live in poverty—and living with
them are children of all ages, not just children under the age of six, as
compared to 10.4% of married women. This is almost twice as high as the
overall poverty rate.108 Separating or divorcing mothers are 2.83 times
more likely to be below the poverty line than those that remain married.109

105. See William V. Fabricius et al., Parenting Time, Parent Conflict, Parent-Child.
Relationships, and Children's Physical Health in Parenting Plan Evaluations 188 (review
ing his previous studies and others).
106. Paul R. Amato et al., Changes in Nonresident Father-Child Contact from 1976 to 2002,
58 Fam. Rel. 41, 50 (2009).
107. Jay D. Teachman & Kathleen M. Paasch, Financial Impact of Divorce on Children and
Their Families, 4 Children and Divorce 63, 64 (1994).
108. Marital Events of Americans: 2009 U.S. Census Bureau 9 (2011).
109. Patrick F. Fagan et al., Marriage and Economic Well-Being: The Economy of the
Family Rises or Falls with Marriage, Marriage & Religion Research Institute Executive
Summary 2 (2011).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 371

Furthermore, following divorce, the parent with custody experiences a

significant decrease in family income.110 Clearly, parents have much
fewer financial resources available to them immediately after the divorce.
The increased stress that this creates adds to a parent's feelings of being
overwhelmed by all that is occurring.
Parents often cannot survive on their decreased income and often have
to work more. This results in children of divorce spending more time in
day care and being less likely to be taken care of by their father when their
mother is at work.111 Part of the negative impact some children experience
following their parents' divorce is a result of the added financial strain on
parents and a decrease in parental supervision and involvement. Not only
must parents work longer hours, but also children may have less opportu
nities for activities due to limited family resources to pay for them.
Results from the National Institute of Child Health and Human
Development study of early childcare lend support to the significan
impact economics have upon children post-divorce.112 This study consi
ed of more than 1,200 children, ages zero to three from intact, never ma
ried, separated, and divorced families. One aspect of the study, which
included 340 families, assessed how children were functioning at fifteen
twenty-four, and thirty-six months of age. The results showed significan
differences between children of divorced parents and those of intact fam
ilies.113 When family income and maternal education were statistically
controlled, however, children from separated or divorced families per
formed no worse than children from intact families at the age of thirty-six
months. Even at fifteen and twenty-four months of age, differences i
social ability, behavioral problems, and positive and negative behavio
with the mother were significantly reduced when maternal education an
family income were statistically controlled. Cognitive functioning a
fifteen and twenty-four months was the main variable that was still s
nificant at these ages, even after maternal education and family incom
were controlled. The divorced parents in this study divorced prior to the
child being thirty-six months of age. It is likely that the negative impac
on cognitive functioning of children at the ages of fifteen and twenty-four
months is more related to the divorce being more recent and to the sig
nificant changes the children were undergoing at the time.114 It should also

110. See id. (showing a 52% decrease in income); See also Marianne E. Page, Will You
Miss Me When 1 Am Gone? The Economic Consequences of Absent Parents 17 (200
(showing a 42% decrease in income).
111. See Pruett et al., supra note 60 (reviewing research).
112. Clarke-Stewart et al., supra note 17, at 304.
113. Id. at 321.
114. Id. at 322.

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372 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

be noted that the one significant factor that still remained, cognitive abil
ity, is something that can be quite variable among young children. The
results of this study support the argument that part of the negative impact
that children experience post-divorce is directly related to the economic
changes in the parents. These economic changes can lead to higher levels
of parental stress and less supervision or support for their children.

E. Children Have Their Own Contributions as

Well—Appraisal and Perception
Children respond in various manners to changes in their life, including
divorce. There are several reasons why children post-divorce may have
difficulty coping with the changes that have occurred. However, not all of
the reasons some children do well and others do not do well post-divorce
are a result of outside influences. Children, themselves, contribute to their
own functioning. Children bring their own coping skills and temperament
to dealing with the divorce. Children with better coping and stress man
agement skills and a better temperament are likely to have less difficulty
post-divorce than children with less developed skills and a more chal
lenging temperament.115 Some children handle transitions better than
others, regardless of the support given to them. These children will likely
handle the transitions between parents' houses better. Research has sup
ported that children who have an easy temperament, are competent, and
have other positive features are more likely to evoke support from others
and are more able to adapt to stressful life experiences.116
Although not directly related to research on children of divorce,
Cumming and Davies are two of the more prominent authors on children's
own perceptions, and their recent book provides an excellent summary of
the research in this area.117 They discuss some of the research on the
impact of children's exposure to conflict. They state that with "repeated
exposure to angry, hostile, and unresolved disputes between parents, chil
dren are thought to become increasingly likely to perceive parental con
flicts as threatening."118 It goes on to state that this increase in appraisal
of threat can predispose children to an increased risk for adjustment prob
lems. Further, "[increasing feelings of guilt, shame, helplessness, and
poor self-worth—outgrowths of these appraisal processes—may develop

115. See CUMMINGS & Da vies, supra note 59 (discussing the influence of children's percep
tion and temperament and the impact of these on children's adjustment to divorce).
116. Eileen Mavis Hetherington, Coping with Family Transitions: Winners, Losers, and
Survivors, 60 Child Dev. 1,11 (1989).
117. See Cummings & Da vies, supra note 59 (discussing children's perceptions and how
those perceptions impact their interpretation of events and functioning).
118. Id. at 47.

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 373

into broader patterns of adjustment problems."119 Extrapolating this to

divorce situations, children who tend to blame themselves more for the
divorce have an increased risk of adjustment problems. Other research has
shown support for their conclusions. For example, a recent study found
that adolescents' cognitive appraisals and coping strategies when exposed
to interparental conflict were related to internalizing and externalizing
problems.120 There are several other studies that also tie children's
appraisal and self-blame to adjustment problems.121 Optimism has also
been found to be a mediator between interparental conflict and child
adjustment.122 Children's temperament has been found to be related to
health. For example, a study of 413 fifth-grade students in Tehran found
that children's temperament and appraisal of interparental conflict
impacted their physical and psychosocial health.123
Studies directly related to divorce adjustment have also found that per
ception impacts functioning.124 For example, young adults were asked
about their spiritual responses to their parents' divorce.125 The authors
controlled for general religiousness and spirituality, and still found that
those young adults who perceived their parents' divorce as a desecration
or sacred loss reported higher levels of anxiety, depression and painful
feelings about the divorce.126 There is no reason to think that children and
adolescents would not have a similar response. Thus, children's own attrib
utes and perceptions impact how they respond to external situations. Yet,
this area of the research has not been studied as much. There is a wealth of
research on the impact of external factors on children of divorce, but much
less on what children themselves bring to the table and what contributions
they make in relation to how they cope with various external stressors. One

119. Id.
120. See Shelton & Harold, supra note 70, at 720-21. Katharine H. Shelton & Gordon T.
Harold, Pathways Between Interparental Conflict and Adolescent Psychological Adjustment:
Bridging Links through Children's Cognitive Appraisals and Coping Strategies, 28 J. Early
Adol. 555 (2008).
121. See Andree Siffert et al., Marital Conflict an Early Adolescents' Self-Evaluation: The
Role of Parenting Quality and Early Adolescents' Appraisals, 41 J. Youth Adolescence 749
(2012); Andree Fortin et al., Children's Appraisals as Mediators of the Relationship Between
Domestic Violence and Child Adjustment, 26 Violence Victims 377 (2011).
122. Julia Howe Robinson, Interparental Conflict and Child Adjustment: The Role of Child
Optimism, 71 Dissertation Abstracts Int'l 1353 (2009).
123. Fatemah Gharenbaghy & Maryam Aguilar-Vafaie, The Role of Marital Conflict and
Family Emotional Security in Children's Physical and Psychosocial Health, 15 Iranian J.
Psychiatry & Clin. Psychol. 359 (2010).
124. Heidi L. Warner et al., When Parents Break Sacred Vows: The Role of Spiritual
Appraisals, Coping and Struggles in Young Adults' Adjustment to Parental Divorce, 1
Psychol. Rel. Spirituality 233, 244 (2009).
125. Id. at 237.
126. Id. at 244.

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374 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

area that has only recently begun to be studied is that of genetics. Some
children may be genetically inclined to better respond to some situations
than other children. Regardless, children's and adolescents' appraisal of
events, as well as their temperament and coping skills mediate how they
respond to divorce and some of its associated features, such as parental
conflict and transitions.

IV. Conclusions

Over the course of history, divorce has been viewed as pathogenic for
children.127 For a variety of reasons, the media and the general communi
ty tends to view divorce as bad. Many people assume that divorce will
severely impact children in a negative manner. The research does not bear
this out. Is it possible the research is too simplistic, and more advanced
studies would show that more children are negatively impacted by divorce
than current research suggests? Yes. Is it possible that the general com
munity's and media's assumptions are wrong and that divorce does not
negatively impact nearly as many people as believed and not as severely?
Yes. So what's the truth?
Based on current research, it appears that about 20% to 25% of children
post-divorce have severe problems.128 Approximately 75% to 80% do not
have significant psychological difficulties. Most children do well post
divorce and do not seem different than their peers who are from intact
families. While children may still miss the ideal family and have some
negative feelings about their parents' divorce as Emery has found,129 this
is no different than children who experience other difficult childhood
events, such as the death of a parent. Having a stressful and challenging
event in childhood does not mean, however, that a child will develop sig
nificant psychological difficulties
The research on the impact of divorce on children shows that when chil
dren have difficulties post-divorce it is related to specific factors that are
associated with divorce, but are not a result of the divorce itself. When the
negative aspect of these factors is managed well, children will likely do
better post-divorce. While the main variables found in the research were
presented in this article, there may be other variables that also impact chil
dren post-divorce. For any given family, how much each factor impacts the
child will vary. For example, in high-conflict families, parental fighting
may have the greatest negative impact on the children. Whereas in anoth

127. Hetherington, supra note 11, at 857.

128. Eileen Mavis Hetherington, Social Support and the Adjustment of Children in Divorced
and Remarried Families, 10 Childhood 217, 220 (2003).
129. See Kelly & Emery, supra note 37 (reviewing research on the impact of divorce on
children).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 375

er family, where the parents get along well but reduced finances force them
to relocate to a less desirable area and a main caregiver must return to
work, financial issues may have the greatest negative impact on children.
Finally, if one accepts the research and belief that approximately 25%
of children from parents who divorce have problems and that only 10% of
children from intact families have difficulties,130 then what accounts for
the 15% differential? Based on a review of the research, it is clear that
whether children thrive or founder may not be due to the divorce itself, but
rather: (1) the level of conflict between parents, (2) children's exposure to
the conflict—including whether parents involve their children in the fight
ing, (3) parents' inability to meet their children's needs, (4) parents' men
tal health, (5) the financial impact of the divorce, and (6) children's own
perceptions about the divorce. If there is a 15% differential, then most of
this is likely accounted for by the above factors, the children's exposure
to it, leaving little left for divorce, in and of itself, as being a significant
cause of harm to children. Furthermore, as has been pointed out by oth
ers,131 most children of divorce are indistinguishable from their peers
whose parents did not divorce. In conclusion, it is argued that these five
factors account for why some children have significant emotional or
behavioral problems post-divorce and that it is not the divorce itself that
causes these difficulties.

V. Recommendations

First and foremost, it is vital that attorneys and judges educate parents
about the negative impact of conflict upon their children. Providing edu
cation to parents during divorce on a variety of issues is part of an attor
ney's and judge's responsibility. Attorneys might require clients to read
certain materials as part of the retainer agreement. For example, parents
may benefit from reading a book such as Mom's House Dad's House by
Isolini Ricci.132 While not every parent may benefit from this, some will
learn enough from it to alter how they interact with their spouse and child
post-divorce. Attorneys can also help their clients settle cases rather than
go to trial, as trials often result in increasing the level of conflict between
the parents,133 often to an irreparable degree. While parent education

130. Hetherington & Kelly, supra note 50, at 150.

131. See Kelly & Emery, supra note 37, at 352 (reviewing research of Amato, Chase
Lansdale et al., Emery, Hetherington, and others supporting this).
132. Isolini Ricci, Mom's House, Dad's House: Making Two Homes for Your Child 1
(1997).
133. David A. Sbarra & Robert E. Emery, Deeper into Divorce: Using Actor-Partner
Analyses to Explore Systemic Differences in Coparenting Conflict Following Custody Dispute
Resolution, 22 J. Fam. Psychol. 144 (2008).

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376 Family Law Quarterly, Volume 47, Number 3, Fall 2013

classes that many parents attend prior to divorce provide information on

conflict, this is not enough. Although parents do not always have the
financial resources, another recommendation, especially in high conflict
cases, is to have parents work with a parent coordinator, mediator, thera
pist or life coach that has both experience working with divorced couples
and knowledge of the legal system. If parents would meet with one of
these professionals post-decree, even if only once per month for three
months, it may lead to helping them not only work together, but also to
understanding more about how conflict harms children and help them
develop new ways for managing their conflict.
The use of a therapist can also be helpful to provide support for parents
going through divorce. As described in this article, parenting skills are
often diminished for a while post-divorce and having a professional not
only provide emotional support, but also give guidance for how to devel
op a functioning new household and manage the stress and new role that
he or she is encountering can help parents do their jobs better. Ultimately,
this will benefit children. Furthermore, for those parents with significant
mental health issues, having the support and help of a therapist during this
transitional time can provide not only a great deal of support, but also help
build parenting skills as well as coping skills. Aside from therapeutic
services, attorneys can support parents' involvement in support groups or
talk with them about the need to have a strong social support network and
the benefit this can have for them and their children.
Given that children's own appraisal of events impacts adjustment and
functioning, having children who are struggling post-divorce participate
in individual or group treatment can be beneficial. Programs have been
designed specifically to help children cope with divorce, and results are
positive for the impact of these programs on children.134 These programs
can assist children in altering their perceptions of events, improve coping
skills, and provide support during a time of transition.
Of great importance is paying closer attention to finances. Clearly, the
changes in parents' financial situations post-divorce impact both the par
ents' and the child's functioning. This is likely most relevant to the parent
who is the main caregiver for the child. Because of this, more attention
needs to be paid to making sure that the parent who is the main caregiver
has as much financial stability as possible. This can help reduce the par
ent's level of stress, which can have a direct effect on the parent's and
child's functioning. Furthermore, it may allow the main caregiver not to

134. See Rachel A. Haine et al., Changing the Legacy of Divorce: Evidence from Prevention
Programs and Future Directions, 52 Fam. Rel. 397 (2003) (reviewing the positive impact of
group treatment programs for parents and children).

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 Deconstructing the Impact of Divorce on Children 311

have to increase work hours. This can often mean fewer changes for the
child or children and more direct supervision by a parent.
A change in statutes can also have a positive effect on minimizing con
flict between parents. Parents often get caught up in the concept of joint
versus sole custody in regards to decision making. For purposes of this
discussion, joint and sole custody refers only to making major decisions for
children, such as health care, education, religious education, and after
school activities. Parents often argue about these issues. It is recommend
ed that statutes remove these terms from their vocabulary. Rather than call
one parent a sole custodian, or say both parents have joint custody, it would
be more helpful if statutes allowed parenting plans to describe which par
ent makes which decisions alone, which decisions must be made jointly
and which decisions are made by one parent, but with consideration of the
other parent's wishes. Often parents get hung up on having joint custody
when it's the phrase that means more to them than who actually makes the
decisions. Banning these phrases may help decrease conflict between par
ents and actually help attorneys resolve cases quicker.
Another term that should be banned is "visitation." Parents are often
insulted that they have visitation with their children. Children do not visit
their parents; they live with them at different times. The term "visitation"
is offensive to some parents and may make reaching a parenting plan
agreement more difficult. Attorneys often use technical legal terms in
agreements without realizing that these terms may actually slow the set
tlement process. It is better to use the term "parenting time," rather than
visitation. That way, each parent has parenting time with the children,
even if one parent has significantly less time. The same holds true for the
concept of "residential parent." There is not one residential parent. Both
parents are usually residential parents, but the amount of time each child
spends at the residence may vary. Again, rather than label one parent as
the residential parent, which may be required by statute or recommended
by attorneys, it would be better to outline the parenting time each child
spends with each parent without having to label one as the residential par
ent. This may mean altering statutes to remove this phrase.
Terms and phrases that increase conflict or interfere in parents' abilities
to reach agreements ultimately can negatively impact children. There is a
benefit to altering statutes to remove problematic phrases and changing
how parenting plans are written. This may help parents come to agree
ments sooner, decrease conflict between them, and contribute to the
parents being more likely to work together post-decree. Healthy parents
with healthy parenting styles contribute to children who adjust to the
divorce better and are higher functioning.

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