1/9/25, 6:58 PM The Influence of Individual Differences

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The Big Five Personality Traits

A small cluster of fundamental traits does a good job of describing the broad themes in behavior, thoughts, and emotions that distinguish one person
from another (Costa et al., 2019). These key characteristics are called the Big Five traits by personality researchers, and they differ in their influence
on our intimate relationships. Which of these traits do you think matter most?

Open-mindedness—the degree to which people are imaginative, curious, unconventional, and artistic versus conforming, uncreative, and stodgy.

Extraversion—the extent to which people are gregarious, assertive, and sociable versus cautious, reclusive, and shy.

Conscientiousness—the extent to which people are dutiful, dependable, responsible, and orderly versus unreliable, disorganized, and careless.

Agreeableness—the degree to which people are compassionate, cooperative, good-natured, and trusting versus suspicious, selfish, and hostile.

Negative Emotionality—the degree to which people are prone to fluctuating moods and high levels of negative emotion such as worry, anxiety, and
anger.

The five traits are listed in order from the least important to the most influential (Malouff et al., 2010). People are happier when they have
imaginative, adventurous, sociable partners, but what you really want is a lover who is responsible and reliable, generous and thoughtful, and
optimistic and emotionally stable. And after you’ve been together for 30 years or so, you may find that conscientiousness becomes particularly
important (Claxton et al., 2012); dependable partners who keep all their promises are satisfying companions (Williams et al., 2019).

The most influential Big Five trait, however, is the one that has a negative impact: negative emotionality (Malouff et al., 2010). High scorers are prone to
anxiety and anger, and those unhappy tendencies tend to result in touchy, pessimistic, and argumentative interactions with others. In fact, a remarkable
study that tracked 300 couples over a span of 45 years found that a full 10 percent of the satisfaction and contentment spouses would experience in their
marriages could be predicted from measures of their negative emotionality when they were still engaged (Kelly & Conley, 1987). The more optimistic,
positive, and emotionally stable the partners were, the happier their marriages turned out to be, and that’s a result that has stood the test of time (van
Scheppingen et al., 2019). Everyone has good days and bad days, but some of us chronically have more bad days (and fewer good ones) than other people
(Borghuis et al., 2020)—and those unlucky folks are especially likely to have unhappy, disappointing relationships. (Do take note of this when you’re
shopping for a mate! And assess your own Big Five traits, if you like, with the scale in Table 1.3.)

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TABLE 1.3. The Big Five Inventory–2 Extra-Short Form

These 15 items provide a very efficient way to reliably assess our Big Five traits (Soto & John, 2017). To which trait does each item pertain? Which of the Five characterize you best?

Here are a number of characteristics that may or may not apply to you. For example, do you agree that you are someone who likes to spend time with others? Please write a number next
to each statement to indicate the extent to which you agree or disagree with that statement.

1 2 3 4 5
Disagree strongly Disagree a little Neutral; no opinion Agree a little Agree strongly

I am someone who...

1. ____ Tends to be quiet.

2. ____ Is compassionate, has a soft heart.

3. ____ Tends to be disorganized.

4. ____ Worries a lot.

5. ____ Is fascinated by art, music, or literature.

6. ____ Is dominant, acts as a leader.

7. ____ Is sometimes rude to others.

8. ____ Has difficulty getting started on tasks.

9. ____ Tends to feel depressed, blue.

10. ____ Has little interest in abstract ideas.

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