11 J

11

9'
*^H

|,iFi.
, ]
L-vs v ■■ -::mi*m

M<lip- 1
i
•;x%w •■•
 Digitized by the Internet Archive
in 2011

http://www.archive.org/details/leathermanshandbOOtown
The

LEATHERMAN'S
LARRY TOWNSENR
COPYRIGHT © 1983, 1989, 1993 BY LARRY TOWNSEND

ALL RIGHTS RESERVES

PUBLISHES BY
CARLYLE COMMUNICATIONS, LTD.
462 BROADWAY
NEW YORK, NEW YORK 10013

PRINTED IN CANADA

ISBN 0503 09999 6

 !LIEATHERMAN'S HANDBOI DKII
CHAPTERER TITLE PAGE
INTRODUCTION n
1 Background, History and Definition 13
2 The Initial Seen and Oasie Equipment a
3 The Flexibility of Roles
4 Fetish and fantasy II
51
5 Master and Slaves 111
6 The Rasie Specialties 121
7 Tie Anal Specialties 154
S Setting the Scene 111
a The Castration Complex, Real and Symbolic 211
10 The Advanced Specialties, Croup 1 214
251
ii The Advanced Specialties, Group II
12 Permanent Piercings and
Other Rodily Adornments 275
13 Drugs, Booze and Health 217
14 The Maestro's Circular File 317
15 The Survey and the Future 345
 >
HI

by larry Townsend
INTRODUCTION

!n the early 70's, when I wrote the original Leatherman's

Handbook, the Gay Community was just entering a new era
of social and political freedom. For the first time in living
memory we were able to enjoy our own business establish-
ments without fear of police harassment, and openly hold
meetings to discuss the furtherance of our goals. At least we

IV
had achieved this in the cities where our numbers forced the
local politicians to hear us, due to our power on election day.
Gradually, over the succeeding decade, we made further in-
roads into the mainstream of American life. By the early 80's
we still had a long way to go, but we were "getting there."
Thus when I sat down to write the introduction to the original
edition of this sequel, I was able to express some satisfac-
tion at the progress we had made, and note how the improve-
ments inthe general social climate had affected those in the
Leather/SM community, as well. Assuming we were willing
to continue our vigilance— to safeguard the achievements we
had already made — and to continue pressing forward on other
issues, the future looked bright, indeed.
 But even as I blithely penned these lines, describing the
pleasures and pitfalls of various leather-SM activities, the
storm clouds were already gathering. The AIDS virus was
even then beginning its insidious encroachment. Several
hundred men had already fallen victim to this mysterious
malady, with thousands more about to be infected. No one
knew exactly why this was happening to us, and it was thus
impossible to advise people how to protect themselves. My
original comments were labeled "Kaposi's Sarcoma," and
within the text I referred to the general syndrome as "G.R.I.D.
or A.I.D.S." Such was the state or our knowledge at that point.
When the original press run for this book was sold out, the
publisher and I decided that it should be reissued with an
AIDS update. It then became a matter of deciding how to ap-
proach the issue of "safe sex." Although these restrictions
still permit a degree of pleasure that is certainly preferable
to "no sex at all," it is generally not the type of sexual activ-
ity that one is most apt to enjoy in his fantasies. Because of

VI
this, it has been my contention that fictional accounts of sex-
ual encounters should be written to permit the reader a full
range of mental images, even (or especially) if these images
exceed the limits of the practices that are considered safe
from the standpoint of minimizing one's chances of contract-
ing the AIDS virus. In a sense, we are responding to the same
expectation that dictates our choice of character descriptions
in a story. The reader may very well go home and have
glorious sex with a person who is considerably less attrac-
tive than a Colt model. But when he reads a story, he is much
more entertained if the protagonists are all beautiful beyond
any reality he is likely to encounter.
Based on the above philosophy, we have left the little sto-
ries and vignettes much as they were in the original, but have
added safe sex comments into the text before and/or after
them— wherever these seemed most appropriate. Just as the
writer of a murder mystery or a spy drama does not expect
his/her readers to go out and poison the vicar, or buy an

VII
Uzi to mow down suspected foreign agents, so I remind my
readers that any sexual exchange must take into account the
danger of contracting this terrible disease.
Because the threat is so real, and the potential result so
catastrophic, I am going to list the most important precau-
tions here, and reiterate them at the appropriate places in
the succeeding text. I am particularly concerned that you keep
these cautions in mind as you read the little stories, and not
get carried away with any ideas that could endanger your
health. You may have read it all before, but it is so important
that all of us not forget, let's run through it once again.
AIDS is caused by a virus. (Although there is a minority
opinion which suggests the virus might simply be present be-
cause some other factor makes it possible for it to exist within
the body of an infected person.) After questioning doctors
and other health workers, I am convinced that the prevailing
theory is correct. We are dealing with a very tiny infectous
agent that attacks the body's ability to defend itself against
a variety of diseases which would normally be no serious

VIII
threat. Although the virus seems unable to survive very long
outside the body, and can be obliterated by any number of
methods, it has so far eluded effective treatment once a per-
son has been infected. Nor is there a serum to immunize you.
The only way to prevent infection is to avoid contact with it.
I hope that the foregoing will soon be proved wrong, but at
the moment these lines are being written, that's the way it is.
AIDS is transmitted by the exchange of body fluids. This
happens most commonly during sex or by the use of unster-
ilized hypodermic needles. It has also happened to recipients
of blood transfusions, or from a mother to her unborn child.
Since these latter cases are less likely to be an issue for us,
I want to concentrate on the others— except to note that a
person who knows he carries the virus, or who has engaged
in activities that put him at risk should not, under any circum-
stances, donate blood.
The body fluids that are definitely capable of carrying and
transmitting the virus are blood, semen, urine and feces (shit).
Other debatable possibilities are tears, saliva and sweat.
(The results of some recent studies have implied that saliva

IX
may contain an element that retards the virus, but this is not
sufficient grounds to declare oral sex "risk free.") Because
the virus must somehow reach the recipient's bloodstream
to infect him, tears and sweat are unlikely means of transmis-
sion. We will go into more specific considerations at the ap-
propriate places in the book.
The two surest methods of passing the virus appear to be
anal sex (fucking) and sharing a hypodermic needle. Again,
I am going to pass on a detailed discussion of needles at this
point, because this activity is not often a leather/SM problem.
We'll take it up in the appropriate sections. Anal sex, however,
is very much in the mainstream of our behavior. The use of
a condom (rubber) is recommended as the principal means
of cutting the risk, but it is not 100% effective. Rubbers also
vary greatly in their abilty to confine the virus. We have listed
the results of some lab tests on various popular brands of
condoms in Chapter 13. We will also mention the specific
dangers and possible safety factors involved in the variations
of anal sex that are common in SM situations.
 Similarly, contact with bodily wastes may be more likely
to occur in certain SM situations than in more vanilla sex,
so we will comment on these specifics at the appropriate
point. We also use a lot more equipment than other people,
and there are various precautions we should take in assur-
ing that these do not become instruments of transmission.
I will try to cover all of these bases as well.
As a general comment, I simply want the reader to bear
in mind that however much one activity or another may ap-
peal to him, the basic safe-sex rules should always apply.
For a guy involved in SM sex, I recommend that you adhere
to the following suggestions.
1) Do not engage in any activity which results in the deposit-
ing of semen into the anal cavity.
2) Be selective in choosing a partner, and observe the nor-
mal standards of hygiene.
3) If you engage in any activity that draws blood (piercing,
flagellation, etc.) be sure that:
a) you do not ingest the discharge, either orally or
otherwise.

XI
 b) that the instruments you use are never used on
another person without a thorough cleaning with bleach or
alcohol. It is safest to either discard them, or to retain them
only for use on the same person.
4) If you fuck, use a rubber.
5) If you suck cock, do not take the discharge into your
mouth. If this should happen, rinse with alcohol (vodka or
whiskey
of infection. will do.) It's not 100%, but it will help cut the risk
6) If you are already infected, you should be especially
cautious to observe the safe-sex rules, and you should in-
form your partner.
I will try to add other precautions at the appropriate places,
but the first five rules will help to protect you— not 100%, but
they will cut the risk. Remember, you are playing with your
life and possibly with the life of your partner. Only total
abstinence (or solo JO) is total protection, and I assume you
want to know more about the scene than that. I will now try
to describe it for you, both the way it is, and the way it was.

XII
CHAPTER ONE— Background, History, and
Definitions
Lest anyone picking up this book for a quick newsstand
perusal be confused by the title, let me state that this is not
a treatise on how to make nifty little leather items like tooled
belts and ladies' purses. We are dealing with the subject of
mala-to-male, sado-masochistic sexual behavior. I will attempt
in the succeeding pages to explain exactly what we do, how
we do it, and, to the best of my ability, why we do it. I will
give as much historical background as possible in each par-
ticular;shall
I summarize the most popular (or unpopular)
psychological explanations and theories: I will try to point out
the best and safest techniques, as well as the pitfalls and
dangers; and I will provide the reader with a few illustrative
anecdotes and action vignettes. In doing this, I will use con-
temporary vernacular, scientific jargon, little words, big words,
four-letter words. If this proposal appeals to you, buy the book
and read it. Otherwise, please put it back on the shelf; the
last thing I want to do is upset anyone.
A little over ten years ago I signed a contract to write The
Leatherman's Handbook, promptly sat down at the type-

13
writer and completed the manuscript in just over six weeks.
Prior to this, I spent several months gathering various
bits of information, collating them, and making the outline
I would eventually follow. In other words, when I started the
actual writing, I knew exactly where I was going. No one had
ever done it before. It was a virgin field, wide open, and, ex-
cept for my disagreements with a few shrinks here and there,
the ideas I was suggesting were fresh and new. Of course,
I was also fresher and newer. Now, somewhat scarred (but
basically untarnished) by the ensuing decade, I'm about to
do it again.
This time, however, I am faced with a mountain of written
material expressing the opinions of a great many people. In
the course of our discussions, I will try to refer to the best
of these. But making the present task far more difficult than
the written words needing to be emphasized or disclaimed
is the enormous increase of people particpating in a very wide
variety of activities. SM has become a little like the practice
of medicine, where the general practitioners have given way
to specialists. Thus, the preparation for this attempt has re-
quired agreat deal of investigation and research (Some of
the research was wonderful!). I will now try to pick up the
varied and tangled threads from where I left off, and see if
it is possible to bring a little order to the wide range of sub-
jects we have to consider.
By rights, our first task should be to define the term "SM"
(or "S&M"). Although the letters "S" and "M" are easy to
translate— S being "sadist" or "sadism," and M being
"masochist" or "masochism," a proper explanation of the
combined initials is a little more difficult. In fact, SM has
become such a loaded term, it tends to have different
peripheral connotations, depending on the person using or
hearing it. When we add the concept of "leather," we fur-
ther complicate the problem. Not all people who wear leather
clothing are into SM— not by a long shot; nor do all SM peo-
ple necessarily wear leather. For a person involved in SM
practice, an accurate definition is probably not very impor-
tant, but for the novice or uninitiated it may be, and for them
I will try to untangle the web of confusion.
14
 If you read the original Handbook, you will notice that I used
the term "S&M" throughout the text. Ten years ago this was
the only proper way to write it. Since then, we have begun
to see "SM" instead. To me, the ampersand (&) implies a
dichotomy, i.e., two parts: Sadism and Masochism. SM would
more properly be read: sado-masochism. In surveying the
results of my recent questionnaire (see final chapter), I would
attach more than a casual meaning to this. In 1970 there was
a fairly distinct line between the group of men who normally
played the role of S and those who were exclusively M. Now
the majority are switch-hitters, neither pure S nor pure M,
but rather SM. At least this is my perception, determining my
present use and preference for the more current term.
Because I consider any attempt to define SM in a single,
concise phrase to be the ultimate exercise in futility— or
masochism— I shall forego the temptation to add yet another
version to the great discarded stack of unsuccessful, inad-
equate verbal garbage. Instead, let me suggest a short list
of characteristics I find to be present in most scenes which
I would classify as SM:
1) A dominant-submissive relationship.
2) A giving and receiving of pain that is pleasurable to both
parties.
3) Fantasy and/or role playing on the part of one or both
partners.
4) A conscious humbling of one partner by the other
(humiliation).
5) Some form of fetish involvement.
6) The acting out of one or more ritualized interactions
(bondage, flagellation, etc.).
There are surely other factors, including the real or pre-
tended use of force, some form of emotional attachment-
even a love relationship if the particular scene is one of a
series. But these will be less consistent than the six points
I've listed, and even these six are subject to dispute. Still,
if all six elements are present, I would feel fairly safe in stating
that we are describing an SM situation. Start taking some
away and it becomes "iffy." I am not going to attempt any
greater definition of SM, although you will find a few addi-
15
tional suggestions in the succeeding chapters.
To achieve a definition of SM that is going to be satisfac-
tory for you— your only real concern, anyway— I suggest you
consider your own behavior and fantasies in the context of
the many situations I shall describe, and decide for yourself.
As the learned Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart re-
marked intrying to rule oi\the obscenity or otherwise of the
French film The Lovers: "I can not define pornography, but
I know it when I see it." I think most of us are in the same
boat when it comes to defining SM.
Just to further orient the uninitiated, we should note that
the number of people involved in male-to-male SM is probably
less than their heterosexual counterparts, mostly because
bondage— one of our acknowledged components of SM—
seems to have taken on a new respectability in het circles.
You will find it included in several popular sex guides, and
it is safe to assume that a fair number of heterosexual couples
have tried it. Several suppliers of SM gear— the Pleasure
Chest chain being the largest and most notable example-
have made a great deal of money by offering female as well
as male clothing and toys. In fact, a couple of the Pleasure
Chest outlets (Chicago and one in New York) have an almost
exclusively heterosexual trade. However, this het community
is less visible than ours, because it tends to be more
closeted— as we were in the fifties and before. Yet witness
the fact that almost every "first class" bordello for centuries
has offered a flagellation and/or bondage specialty, and it is
difficult to deny the long-term existence of a strong heterosex-
ual interest. I'll have more to say about this later.
There are a couple more terms we should examine before
I start using them and confuse the uninitiated. Basic to most
SM relationships is the factor of dominance-submission. The
"S" or sadist is supposed to dominate, making him the
"Top," whereas the "M" or masochist submits, making him
the "bottom." As we shall see, there is some ambiguity to
these roles, but for purposes of our present, general discus-
sion they will have to do. The term SM itself produces some
confusion, because "S" could easily stand for "slave" and
"M" for "Master"; but I will not use them in this context. As
16
I was at some pains to note above, you will find the term also
written as S&M, implying a distinct difference between these
two sides of the same coin. I just wish to emphasize that my
use of this more newly popular term has to do with my latter
day perception of more and more people coming to embrace
both components.
As to the basic S and M, these are derived from the names
of two important historical figures. The Marquis de Sade is
the man from whose name the word "sadist" was formed.
Although he wrote many stories and vignettes extolling the
joys of bondage and discipline, plus a good many of the other
practices we will be exploring, his attempts to put these ideas
into actual practice landed him in prison for a major portion
of his adult life. France was on the verge of revolution, and
his family's relationship to King Louis XVI (who eventually
met his fate under the blade of the guillotine), made it
dangerous to have a man of de Sade's persuasions running
around on the loose. We might also note that Le Grand Mar-
quis did have a penchant for subjecting his victims to involun-
tary submission, which would get one into difficulties with the
law even in our more liberal contemporary society. Insensitive
as the French nobility were to the feelings of the masses, the
exotic behavior of this particular man went just a bit too far.
If you are interested in reading these orginial fantasies,
there are a number of good translations available. Be sure
to select an "unexpurgated" volume, since the others omit
exactly the material you are buying the book to read. The most
famous of de Sade's novels are: Justine, or The Folly of Vir-
tue; its sequel Juliette, or The Triumph of Vice; and The 120
Days of Sodom. In the first two stories, the heroines were
sisters, Justine being the poor sweet innocent to whom all
the terrible things happened, with her hating every minute
of it. As a result, she ended up a broken wreck in the gutter.
Juliette, who did all the same things and loved every one of
them, succeeded to all sorts of joy, wealth and power. There
are also several collections of de Sade's shorter writings,
some of which may be a little too rich even for our more
modern, sophisticated tastes, since he delves into coprophilia,
necrophilia, and various other subjects to a depth that
17
exceeds the limits of any current writer (but which also makes
one wonder if a definition of the "S" part of SM might not
be even wider than we are normally willing to acknowledge).
Leopold von Sacher-Masoch was an Austrian gentleman
novelist who came along about two generations after de Sade.
A much more refined writer, he extolled the virtues of pain
and suffering. Although he was very unhappy about it, Kraft-
Ebing used his name as the basis for the term "masochist"
whenlieassembted-his Psychopathia Sexualis. Von Masoch's
most easily obtainable novel is Venus in Furs— a wonderful-
ly insightful account of a man's complete submission to a
woman. (There's more to it than that, but for our purposes
the basic theme is enough.) This same work also sets forth
a philosophy of sexual freedom— very tame stuff to us, but
quite heady by mid-Nineteenth Century standards.
Gilles Deleuze, a professor of philosophy at the University
of Paris, does a comparative analysis of de Sade and Sacher-
Masoch in his book Masochism (George Braziller, 1971), con-
cluding that the two men lived in such different worlds (in time
and space as well as mentally) that the linking of their names
in the term "sado-masochist" is truly ironic. Yet there they
are, married for all time, immortal (some would say "im-
moral") and inseparable.
Unfortunately, both terms have fallen into a common usage
that distorts their true meaning and loads them with com-
pletely invalid connotations. A man who beats his dog, or
abuses his children, is called a "sadist," whereas a woman
who, out of love and a feeling of duty, devotes her life to the
care of her ailing parents, may be referred to as a "maso-
chist." Even with the emerging recognition of SM as an im-
portant part of many people's lifestyles, our media writers
refuse to acknowledge the difference between these situa-
tions and the overt sexual connotations of the terms. Perhaps
the "average man" is considered too stupid or ignorant to
appreciate the subtle variations. By most of our western
population, then, SM is regarded as something evil, sick,
etc.— at best the subject for idiots to joke about. Sound famil-
iar? It's the same attitude all gay people were fighting a few
years back, and that most "liberated women" still face today.
18
 The positive value of SM has never been properly under-
stood outside our own circles, except more recently by a
fringe of people who have taken the time to find out what the
practices are all about. Of course, the fear of SM will prob-
ably always be there, because the repressed SM component
within people's basic personalities is so nearly universal.
Recently, we have found some students of social science
recognizing SM practices as an enormous catharsis, the
healthy venting of energies that might otherwise prove
destructive. That is the answer if you really need one. But
just as sex in general can be analyzed into all sorts of exotic
motivations and results, or simply viewed as something peo-
ple do for pure enjoyment, so it is with SM. I doubt that very
many guys go to a bar or any other place to make an SM
contact with the idea of venting their energies in a sublimated
setting. They do it because they enjoy it, exactly as a man
and woman get it on, for no better reason than the fabulous
feeling it gives them both.
So don't be put off if I try to satisfy the curious by supply-
ing a bit of psychological jargon here and there. Basically,
we are dealing with a hedonistic pleasure, no better, no worse
than a person indulging himself in any other physical pastime
with a concomitant element of desirable sensation. "But the
things you do are pretty kinky," is the comment I so frequently
hear, and I do not try to deny it. Yet "kinky" generally refers
to the behavior of someone else, doing things we do not like
to do ourselves... or things we are afraid to do, despite our
own repressed desire to give it a try. Everything within an
SM exchange is done with the intent of producing physical
or emotional pleasure. This is the basis for the whole scene
and, simplistic as the statement may seem, it is the univer-
sal key to everything we are going to explore in the course
of this discussion. (If you want a greater expansion on the
philosophy of hedonism, read Jeremy Bentham's
monographs on Utilitarianism, which theories stem from the
early Greek philosophy of Cyrenaics as postulated by
Aristippus.)
In the opening moments of the film Lawrence of Arabia,
Lawrence holds a lighted match under his finger. The
19
sergeant tries it, and drops the charred remains with a cry
of pain: "That hurts!" When Lawrence agrees, the sergeant
asks, "But what's the secret?" and Lawrence tells him: "The
secret is not minding." Since movie directors are loath to
characterize their protagonists with more than mildly unsym-
pathetic traits, I think in the case of Lawrence we might be
justified in assuming his authentic response would have been,
"The secret is enjoying the pain." In our context, as in that
of Lawrence, outsiders perceive us as weird arid kinky sim-
ply because we seem to enjoy activities most people consider
negative.. .painful, undesirable, degrading, maybe even
disgusting.
When asked how I justify these things, my answer is, "I
make no attempt to justify them." They are activities I choose
to perform within the privacy of my own home, or some other
private setting. I do these things with willing adults, and I am
not particularly concerned with how the rest of society regards
me. Neither am I concerned about the behavior of the
heterosexuals who live next door, who surely engage in acts
I would find personally repugnant.
Ironically, the people who are actively concerned with "do-
ing something about us" are the very people whose political
philosophy demands less governmental interference in their
own lives. Somehow, sexual behavior appears to them to be
an area entirely different from any other, an exception to their
other concepts of freedom. By the same token, these self-
appointed guardians of public morality are often involved in
censorship, where books — even novels, which contain only
the printed word— dealing with sexual subjects are the targets
of their witch hunts. Yet they are perfectly willing to see stories
dealing with all manner of violence and life-threatening situa-
tions loaned out by the public libraries or splashed across
a movie screen in gruesome Technicolor. Only when the
adventure is sexual in nature is the story deemed obscene
and subject to censorship. So it is with their attitudes toward
our behavior, not only as practitioners of SM, but as gay men
in general. They see nothing wrong with a road race or hunt-
ing expedition, where accidents claim their share of victims,
but one of the arguments they often use against us is that
20
SM is a dangerous practice.
But such is the world we live in. The prejudice against us
is just one more in a long list of nonsensical inconsistencies.
The nice thing about prejudice, you see, is that it never needs
to be rooted in logic. I have been invited to participate in a
number of academic seminars and discussion groups, spon-
sored bya variety of organizations, ranging from universities
to local gay educational forums. I have always declined, sim-
ply because I refuse to be placed in a position where I have
to justify myself. I don't think it's necessary, because I sin-
cerely believe that whatever I do in private with another
consenting adult is my business. What you do is your
business. If you don't like what I do, don't peek in my win-
dow and you won't see it. If you don't like the things I write,
don't read them.
Just as a side note to all of this, have you ever catalogued
the responses you get from other gay guys when you first
admit your interest in SM? I find the two most common
remarks to be: 1) "I don't think I could ever let someone do
anything like that to me," or 2) "Oh, I could never do anything
like that to another guy." It's interesting insight into the other
person's head. Remember how he replied, should the occa-
sion ever present itself to introduce him to the pleasures you
would like to share.
I would like to return for a moment to a point I made in pass-
ing about the universal, repressed SM component in the
average person's psyche. Although the human animal has
evolved upward (we like to believe) from the primordial beast,
we tend to retain certain traits that existed as important defen-
sive components within the brains of our early ancestors. A
man who has never engaged in a phsyical altercation in his
life will still experience a surge of adrenaline when he is
threatened or placed in a situation he perceives as
dangerous. This involuntary response causes the body to give
off an odor which we have lost the ability to detect, but which
any animal trainer will tell you his charges can sense.
Likewise, buried deep within us, resides the complex of emo-
tional drives to protect ourselves, or to respond to a variety
of situations we are never likely to encounter. These

21
motivating forces, tempered by the conditioning of our en-
vironment (society), cause us to seek our particular modes
of sexual expression— "deviant" if they are not shared by
the majority. In this respect, I think it is probably fair to see
an SM person as functioning on a more primitive sexual level
than other people. Sexually "normal" people may react in
a more primitive mode than we do in other ways, and these
other ways can sometimes be far less healthy for the rest of
society. _,.
The innate need to dominate another person, or to be
dominated, is really quite basic in most men. When the situa-
tion arises for these personality components to reveal
themselves, they always seem to be there... more in some
people than in others, but present nonetheless. Consider what
happens when a man is taken out of his normal, protected
environment, suddenly uprooted and forced into the military,
or prison, or when he enters a rigid corporate structure.
These, and many more we have neither time nor space to
discuss, are situations where the dominant personalities often
become the successful D.l.'s, trustees, guards, or executives.
The submissive usually don't make it. Each of these situa-
tions is,in its own way, a jungle. And the jungle is where it
all began.
In our very complex society, it is not always possible for
a man to work himself into the professional or social situa-
tion where his dominant-submissive needs are fulfilled. Many
factors other than ability and emotional "set" contribute to
our place in life: family ties, educational opportunities,
socioeconomic status in the "family of orientation" (the family
where you are a kid), race, and just plain luck, to name a few.
The attendant frustrations can lead to a strong need to seek
some other outlet for the unfulfilled urgings of the individual's
mind and body. We have come to call this "escapism." Some
people read adventure novels, watch TV, go to the movies,
take up jogging or some other physical exercise program-
all in an attempt to work off the tensions arising from their
dissatisfaction with the "real world." (Apologies to the jog-
gers;know
I some of them do it because they think it's going
to keep them from getting fat and having a heart attack.)
22
 Other forms of escapism, usually chosen by people with
more intelligence and imagination (maybe in addition to some
of the above forms), include creative activities. Some become
collectors or engage in amateur theater, become amateur art-
ists. One of the most popular escapes is gardening. Plants,
after all, do not talk back. But for the select few, the great
escape comes in the blackroom, in bondage and discipline,
in SM and its many variations.
If you have been following my line of reasoning carefully,
you may have noticed that I have not leaned heavily on the
word "sex" as an important part of either the definitions or
escape activities. While for some it certainly is an escape,
it is not necessarily an overt component in every SM activ-
ity. We think of SM as a mode of sexual expression— true
enough, but many scenes result in sexual climax for neither
partner, in others just for one. In a sense, many SM ex-
changes are actually intense, prolonged foreplay, whose
climax, if any, comes long after the major activities have taken
place. And if this climax comes only after the partners have
separated, in a JO scene, let's say, how does such a mastur-
batory session qualify in our list of SM definitions?
The point over which I received the most criticism in the
original Handbook concerned my alleged failure to make
much issue of love and emotional relationships between SM
people. This rather shook me, because I had always presup-
posed the existence of emotional attachments, and had in-
dicated this a number of times. However, I did not devote
a chapter to it, and possibly the more casual reader did not
pick up on the implications— certainly more subtle in a com-
parison tothe physical activities I described. But, lest there
be any doubt, let me reiterate: emotional involvement is just
as prevalent and just as necessary in SM situations as in other
sexual liaisons. It will be just as lacking in an SM one-night
stand as it will be in any other one-night-stand, and just as
deep (possibly deeper) in a long-term relationship as in any
marriage. The empathy between Top and bottom has to be
even deeper and more complete than in any other form of
sexual relationship. If the S cannot feel and understand what
it is the M is feeling and experiencing, there is no way for
23
him to perform adequately. This goes back to the old truism:
every first-rate Top must, at some point in his experience,
have been a bottom. I got arguments on this one, too, and
I'll go into it in more detail in the section on Topmen.
Although for many guys the fantasy of SM involves the pic-
ture of an unfeeling Top doing all sorts of dreadful things to
a bound and unwilling M> there are mercifully few who at-
tempt to act out this imagery. The game is almost inevitably
played on the basis of the S stating: "I'll call the shots; you
set the limits." In a proper scene, the M always has an "out,"
something understood that he can say or do to stop the ac-
tion. Both men are aware of it, and both honor the agreement.
There is, or should be, a mutual respect between the par-
ticipants. The disdain projected by the Top is part of his role-
playing, as is the total surrender of the M. In a longer term
relationship, the giving and taking of "abuse" is actually an
act of love. When it ceases to be a positive expression—
however negative it may appear to an outsider— the relation-
ship is over, or on its way out. The M hanging suspended
for use by the Top is not merely a piece of meat. He is a
human being, and his interaction with the S is an essential
component of the scene. This is the point most misunderstood
by the outsider, which has become grist for the comedian's
mill. In everything from Tom Lehrer's Masochism Tango to
the canned laughter on some uninspired "sitcom," we hear
the ignorant betraying their fears by trying to make us the
butt of their jokes.
But their fear is the fear of the unknown. The jeering
laughter comes from throats that have never taken a cock
in the heated confines of a blackroom. Many do not possess
the intelligence to understand their own urges, nor the
courage to act them out. Too bad, the loss is theirs. Let's
not worry about them. As long as the outsiders leave us alone,
we have no quarrel with them. The only conflict comes from
nosey people trying to impose their values on others— not
the other way around.
If you visit any popular leatherbar on a weekend night,
anywhere in the Western world, you will see a wide range
of guys, "types" if you will. There is a startling similarity be-

24
tween the range of types found in New York and Los Angeles,
San Francisco and Berlin, London and Munich. You'll find
a smaller group in Zurich than you will in Chicago; you'll see
more bikes parked outside the bars on the west coast than
on the east. But the range of attitudes and costumes will be
very much the same. There will be a proliferation of 501
Levi's, leather motorcycle jackets, boots, and cowboy hats.
Most will be drinking beer, and there will always be the cliques
of locals who congregate for a social exchange. If you are
used to visiting your local watering hole in any major city,
you will feel very much at home in any one of the others.
But in all these spots you will find most of the guys dressed
in Levi's and leather, with keys or hankies giving the promise
of their various preferences, to be complete and utter duds.
The real SM guy is definitely in a minority, even in these
centers of supposed "leather action." During the course of
writing this book, I had occasion to visit The Pits, a popular
leatherbar in Los Angeles. I was there on one particular eve-
ning because my friend Wally, manager of The Mineshaft
(NYC) was in town for a visit, and I had been showing him
around. I was, therefore, not really on the make, although
if something wonderful happened...
Be that as it may, I was standing to one side of the upper
bar, waiting while Wally engaged in an animated conversa-
tion with several guys across the room. I noticed an attrac-
tive little number who had followed me when I moved from
the bar to the stack of beer cases along one wall. I knew by
his outfit (red hooded sweatshirt and marshmallow pumps)
that he was an unlikely prospect, yet hope springs eternal.
After several minutes of eye contact and the usual preliminary
introductions, he asked if I lived nearby. This honest open-
ing,thought,
I deserved an equally honest response. Besides,
he seemed like a nice kid and there was no point in my caus-
ing him to waste his last few moments before closing time.
I told him I lived fairly close, and added that I had a small,
well equipped dungeon.
"You mean you'd want to tie me up?" he asked.
"Tie you up and do all sorts of unspeakable things to you,"
I replied.
25
 "You're no just saying that to make me feel good?"
I shook my head. "No, I'm serious," I assured him.
Within seconds, he had disappeared into the crowd, and
I caught only fleeting glimpses of him for the rest of the time
I was there. Nor was he atypical of the people to be found
in any of the popular bars. If I had kidded him along and
brought him home, whatever transpired between us would
probably have been a disaster, at least insofar as an SM ex-
change was concerned. By this I do not mean to deprecate
the quality of leather guys to be found at The Pits, since they
seem to draw a consistently good crowd. But finding an ap-
propriate candidate for whatever your scene may be is not
quite as easy as it would seem when looking over the men
in these locations.
The wearing of leather and the other clothing normally
thought to represent our scene(s), has become so popular
it is a constant annoyance to the real SM man, in that the
old signals one used to seek no longer mean the same thing.
There was a time when keys hanging from the left hip in-
dicated aTopman, whereas those on the right denoted an
M. There was always some ambiguity, since a lot of M's were
reluctant to broadcast their preference, fearing they would
be perceived as less virile or masculine if everybody knew
they were bottoms. But the fact that a man wore keys on his
hip at all used to mean he was into something interesting.
Now, any number of guys hang the keys because they think
it gives them a hot appearance, but many only vaguely realize
the meaning of their signals.
Probably, but not necessarily, a better indication of active
interest is an ear stud, worn in a pierced ear— again, left for
Top, right for bottom. If a guy makes enough of a commit-
ment to have a hole poked through his ear lobe, there is a
better chance of his signals meaning something. Sometimes,
if the guy is bare-chested, a pierced right or left nipple can
tell its story (although many have only costmetic value these
days). The problem with. all these signals, however, is our
having gotten into so many specialized activities that mere
Top or bottom tells only half the story. There still remains the
question of exactly what sort of scene the guy wants. Is he
26
into bondage and discipline? Fistfucking? Watersports?
These are all very different activities. If you're into one, and
he's into another, with no overlap of interests, there's no
sense pursuing him. Again, the answer used to be more sim-
ple than it is at present. I refer to the early days of the hand-
kerchief codes.
For what it is worth, here is an abbreviated list of codes,
adding the caution that many people wear them only because
the idea of the hankie turns them on. The guy with the color
sticking out of his rear pocket may not even know what it
means. Then again, he might, so here are the most impor-
tant codes, worn in the rear pocket of your jeans:

LEFT POCKET HANKIE COLOR RIGHT POCKET

SM Topman, S Black SM bottom, M

Fistfucker, Top Red Fistfucker, bottom
Wants to fuck Dark Blue Wants to get fucked
another guy
Wants to be sucked Light blue Wants to suck cock
Wants to give piss Yellow Wants to take piss
Wants to give shit Brown Wants to take shit
Hustler (wants Green Wants to hire a
money) hustler
Top; anything, any Orange or Bottom; anything
time Multicolor
any time
Top, into piercing Purple Bottom, into
Gray
piercing
Bondage, Topman Bondage Bottom

There are plenty of other colors and meanings, which I

won't bother to list. I have hardly ever seen anyone wear
them, and in many cases the colors are so similar to the
basics listed above, it is impossible to discern them in other
than bright sunlight. These include such esoteric nonsense
as mosquito netting for outdoor sex, or zip-lock baggies in-
dicating you have or want drugs. But no one's ever going
to use or recognize them unless you're in a specific, closed
27
community where everyone knows everyone else anyway.
For practical purposes, you seldom see anything other than
black, red, dark blue, or yellow— maybe brown. A guy who
is really into the heavier action could honestly display several
colors on either side; but I've seldom seen more than two,
and always in the same pocket. Not many are willing to go
all the way to orange.
Going into a fluff bar with your colors showing can
sometimes be as productive as in a leatherbar, since you
stand out as something different, and if there is someone
there who turns on to your scene you will not have as much
competition for his company. I know a number of guys who
do this, especially those who live in areas where there is no
full-time leatherbar. Of course, you may also encounter the
fluff who will make some remark about your perverted tastes.
I recently received a note from a guy who suggested the
proper response: "Thank you, Miss."
I also answered a question in my Drummer column a few
months back, which brought down the wrath of the chicken
hawks on my head. A good-looking kid wrote in, wanting to
know how to keep the nasty SMers off him when he wore
his leathers to a leatherbar. I suggested he might wear a white
hankie to proclaim his virginity, else keep his leather-clad ass
out of our bars until he learned how to use it. Oh, the dirty
old men didn't like that one!

28
CHAPTER TWO— The Initial Scene and
Basic Equipment

We'll begin here with a fairly rudimentary discussion of the

things a novice needs to know. If you have been around the
scene for a while, many of the topics covered will seem so
obvious that you may wonder why I bother with them. Many
times a guy wants to get into his first experience, or visit his
first leatherbar, but is hesitant to try because he is unsure
how to dress or what to carry with him. I would like to ease
this "rite of passage," and to make some suggestions as to
proper attire, attitude and behavior.
Since the choice of being Top or bottom can only be decided
after your initial "baptism of fire," I've left this subject for the
next chapter. I assume that the vast majority of beginners
are going to have the good sense to start at the bottom, quite
literally. But we will not get involved with that right now. I would
also like to remind you that none of these suggestions is carved
in stone. As far as clothing is concerned, once you've been
in a few bars and/or a few scenes you will pretty well know
what to do and wear. To begin, however, I would like to sug-
gest the following:
The clothing you wear to a leatherbar or to an SM encounter

29
should do more than cover your body. Naturally, you want
to display your physical attributes to their best advantage.
A T-shirt or tank top that fits your chest and shows off your
firm, slender torso is never out of place. If you don't have
a firm,slender torso, or if it's too cold for such light covering,
a leather jacket or Levi jacket with a blue workshirt is fine.
Some guys prefer the T-shirt be black, and that will pass any
dress code, as well. Wear jeans, but not the designer vari-
ety. The most popular are Levi 501 (button fly, straight leg),
or any of the other brands of similar cut: work pants, not
fashion models. You may have black leather pants, or a pair
of chaps over your jeans, but I would suggest not investing
in these until you know better what other guys are wearing,
and find out from them how to get the best quality at the best
price. There is a strong prejudice against leather being any
color but black, although I have seen guys in brown leather
cowboy chaps and vest and thought they looked fabulous.
I have also seen a sensational outfit of faded denim-colored
leather, cut as Levi jacket and pants. But leave all these un-
til later, until you know better where you're going and how
you want to look. A black leather vest is less expensive and
always acceptable. It is also cooler than a jacket, and is prob-
ably your best "first investment" in leather. It can be worn
with or without a shirt underneath. In some places, especially
Europe, I have seen a lot of guys wearing scuffed tennis
shoes to the bar, and they seem to be accepted. In the United
States this is not so common. The best footwear is a pair of
black leather boots, or lace-up work shoes in either black or
"natural" (light brown) leather. Loafers or regular shoes do
not do it. If you wear a belt, I recommend a wide black leather
type, which not only looks good, but may be functional if you
get into a situation where you want to perform and there is
no other equipment. A lot of guys are also wearing military
style webbed belts, okay in almost any situation. Studded
belts have become popular in many places. They look fine,
and if you want to pay the price (at least $60, probably closer
to $90) they are also okay. There was a period when belts
made of motorcycle chain were very widely worn, but you do
not see them much anymore.
30
 If you favor a hat, styles commonly seen in the bars and
other gathering places include: leather cycle hats, Marine
fatigue caps, hard hats, cowboy hats, etc. A lot of guys
decorate their cycle caps with chains, or their hard hats with
decals. You'll also see feather bands on many of the cowboy
hats. I would not suggest dangling feathers unless you want
to project the image of a hustler, or some other form of street
trash. Some suppliers have been offering leather kepis
recently— leather replicas of the old Civil War period "reb"
hats, and I think they are pretty sharp.
Wearing any reasonable combination of these basic items
of clothing for your first grand entrance will help you blend
in easily with the crowd. Other than the items mentioned,
there is not much else you will want to wear— maybe a pair
of socks under your boots, but if you wear shorts under your
jeans you stand a good chance of having them ripped off
when and if they are discovered. Some guys like to wear a
jockstrap, and if that turns you on it's fine. There is, of course,
no standard uniform, and as soon as you have been around
for a few visits you will see how the others dress, and can
make your own judgments. My suggestions are only intend-
ed to get you in, and get you started. Anything that em-
phasizes aguy's masculinity is going to be seen from time
to time in our bars. Unless you go to a place with a strict dress
code, you won't feel out of place in any of them. Under no
circumstances should you smell yourself up with cologne or
heavy aftershave. Leave your gold chains and diamond rings
at home.
Most guys like to show a bit of a basket (crotch bulge), and
some kind of cockring is often the answer. In addition to help-
ing itall show a little better, there is a sexy feeling to having
a band of leather or metal fastened about the base of your
genitals. The most common variety is a plain leather band,
usually about half an inch (1.0cm) wide. Most places make
them adjustable, with several snaps on the end(s). For nor-
mal wear, you want a band to be snug but not tight. In a
scene; i.e., in an active sexual situation, you may want it to
fit a bit more snugly, and therefore adjust it accordingly. The
cockring will give you a sensation of enclosure. It will tend

31
to make your balls hang lower, and your cock retain a little
greater circumference. Some guys find the cockring so ex-
citing that they remain fairly tumescent the first few times they
wear it, but once you are used to it, the cockring produces
only a modest effect.
There are many different styles of cockrings on the market,
the second most common being steel. Because these are
solid, not adjustable, it is vital to buy the proper size. Most
guys wear a ring that is 1 3/4 inches (4.5cm) in diameter.
Unless you are exceptionally large or small, this is probably
what you want to order (assuming you do not live near a sup-
plier who will custom fit you). To put on a solid ring, slip one
testicle, then the other, through; once they are completely
enclosed, work the cock down as well. If putting it all through
a ring that is purposely snug, you may want to use a bit of
lubricant (spit will do) along the top of your penis, to ease
it into the enclosure without irritating the skin. If it becomes
more of a struggle that this, you are probably trying to wear
too small a ring. Remember, if you get yourself into the steel
cockring, then swell up so much that you can't get it off, you
may end up having to cut yourself free. One purpose of wear-
ing the ring during sex is that it somewhat restricts the blood
vessels near the surface, the veins that carry the blood out
of the penis and back to the heart, helping you to stay hard—
or harder. A cockring should never be so tight as to affect
the deeper arterial vessels (bring blood into the cock). Nor
should it be so tight that all the veins are obstructed, either.
Progressing from leather and steel, the variety of cockrings
is almost infinite. Many guys favor rubber rings, because they
can be fairly tight, but have enough "give" not to bind. Be-
ing very narrow, they are also less apt to get in the way of
interesting activities. They are also very inexpensive, and in
an emergency can easily be cut off, an advantage over the
solid metal devices.
I have seen cockrings made of brass, fancy silver with
snakes or other motifs, elephant hair, plastic, and even gold.
For an M who likes to be reminded of his status, there are
leather cockrings with pinpricks inside, also heavier duty jobs
with studs outside and two of the four anchor prongs left

32
sticking out on the underside. The small pinpricks will seldom
do more than irritate the skin a bit, the heavier prongs can
make a cut that will bleed. Since either type may penetrate
the skin, wearing should be restricted to one person, to avoid
possible infection or exposure to the AIDS virus.
The chain link cockring was very popular for a while, this
being a circlet of the medium, heavy chain used for a dog's
choke collar. Almost anything that comes in a proper diameter
can be and probably has been used as a cockring.
In England, they made the Energizer, a plastic ring with
unlike metals set top and bottom. It was square to rectangular
in shape, depending on the size, and opened on a swivel
when a catch was unfastened. The idea was to use the
galvanic skin conductivity, causing minute electric currents
to stimulate nerves within the genitals. I liked it, and it did
seem to work. I even carried them for a while in my own mail
order offering. However, the manufacturer made a number
of spurious health claims, and the FDA gave them such a
hassle it became impossible to get them into the United States
at any reasonable price.
Interestingly, the Journal of the American Medical Asso-
ciation ran an article (November 10, 1978) warning of the
danger of "annular constriction" (annular referring to ring),
and the possibility of gangrene in severe cases. The author,
a public health officer in Boston, MA, said: "Penile rings, or
cock rings, are used regularly by some segments of our
population. They are available commercially in pornographic
shops and are of two types, metal and leather . . . according
to the patients and the salesmen, the rings increase the size
of the penis, help to maintain erection for a longer time, and
delay orgasm. As the patient continues to use the ring over
months and years, a chronic doughy edema of the shaft from
lymphatic stasis develops, with enlarged diameter of the penis
in a flaccid state. The glans penis remains normal in size.
"Since these patients use the penile rings only to enhance
their sexual activity, I have not yet seen the gangrene
resulting from continuous prolonged use nor have I seen the
fibrous plaques in the corpora cavernosa as in Peyronie's
disease. However, physicians need to be aware of the
33
frequent use of penile rings in some segments of our popula-
tion in which regular use may result in ecchymosis (bruis-
ing) of the proximal (base) portion of the penis and the
scrotum and lymphatic stasis of the penis."
So cockrings have made the medical journals! Although
the good doctor obviously did some research, he did not seem
aware of the many varieties available. Be that as it may, he
makes the point that prolonged use of a cockring can cause
problems. When people ask me about wearing a ring all the
time, I generally suggest taking it off at night. Wearing it to
bed is not going to do you much good, unless it seems to
be producing more interesting dreams. Neither do you want
to wear a cockring that is too tight or so large that it causes
you to hang up over the crotch of your pants during the course
of your normal bodily movements. In other words, if you wear
a cockring all day, and occasionally experience some discom-
fort because your balls are being too tightly confined, you
should cut down on the length of time you wear it. You can
strain some of the small blood vessels, or create prostate
problems by causing the gland to function without seminal
release (one of the common sources of an inflamed prostate).
If you have been wearing a cockring most of the time and
experiencing these flashes of discomfort, you may notice a
slight rusty tint in you semen (assuming you look at it). This
is probably due to a small discharge of blood from the
prostate— nothing to worry about in most instances, but let
your doctor know. He can probably give you some medica-
tion to clear it up in a few days.
Although in a later chapter I am going to give a more com-
plete rundown of the various toys one might want to use, I'll
mention a couple of basic items here (and omit them there),
just to help round out the picture.
Not suggested for prolonged wear, but nice to carry on your
key chain or in your pocket for use when and if, here are cou-
ple of variations. The first is the very popular English Cage
Harness, sometimes called an "H" harness. Made of leather,
the same half-inch width as a regular cockring, the English
Cage encircles the base of the genitals with one vertical line
of the "H." The horizontal line crosses under and between

34
the testicles, separating them, while the remaining vertical
comes up in front and fastens to the first piece by a couple
of snaps. It provides a moderate spreading and restricts the
balls, at the same time functioning as a regular cockring. It
can be placed on the M as a modest genital torture device,
and used for suspension of weights, since many are equipped
with a small metal "D" ring on the part that spreads the balls.
It is popularly used for a beginner in a genital torture scene,
because the weights are not pulling solely on the testicles,
but are anchored by the cock as well. It gives the M an idea
of the sensation, without the high level of pain he might not
yet be ready to sustain.
The Barrel Ball harness is another favorite device, being
simply a wide band of leather (1 1/2-3 inches) that snaps about
the scrotum, between the base of the cock and the balls,
depressing them downward. The device is usually fitted with
an additional narrow strap at the bottom, which snaps across
the underside of the device to spread the balls and more
tightly restrict them. The suspension of weights from this
crosspiece will result in a heavier pull on the balls alone, as
there is no "anchor piece" about the base of the penis. Since
they come in various widths, these devices can (and are)
popularly used by both beginners and more advanced M's.
Like the English cage, this device is not recommended for
wear under your clothing, although you can do it if you are
careful (or if your Master orders you to), and the effect can
be quite a remarkable display about the crotch.
There are a number of other small devices you might want
to carry on your person, but these are going to be determined
by your own tastes and experience. Of course, most guys
who use amyl (or butyl) will carry a bottle in their pockets.
If you do this, leave it in your pocket while you're in the bar.
Most proprietors take a very dim view of people sniffing on
their premises, and in some jurisdictions it is illegal to
possess. Be sure you know the law in your community, or
the city where you are visiting. I have heard of problems in
such diverse places and Boston and Atlanta. There is also
some suspicion that nitrites can adversely affect the immune
system.

35
 Although I believe, like a good Boy Scout, in always being
prepared, I think it is best not to encumber yourself with a
lot of junk hanging from your belt or stuffing your pockets.
I see guys running around with handcuffs dangling from their
waists (some left, some right) and I've always felt this was
a little more display than I could find comfortable. You really
should not have to proclaim your interests so blatantly,
although I suppose these guys have found it successful. In
many places, the mere possession of handcuffs (let alone
their public display) is illegal, and if someone wants to make
an issue of it, you can be put through some unpleasant
moments.
As to carrying equipment to a prearranged scene, everyone
to his own taste. Many Tops, if they know they are going to
have their encounter outside their own turf, will carry a bag
of toys in their cars. One of those black leather doctor's bags
is just fine. A Top is generally more comfortable and adept
using his own equipment. Personally, I find it disturbing to
have an M arrive with a bag full of toys he expects me to use
on him. If he is submitting himself to my tender care, he can
damned well accept my tools except, of course, for objects
that are going to penetrate the skin (prickers) or asshole
(dildos). In this current health crisis, we have to make some
concessions.
All of which bring us to the first discourse on attitude, in
this instance the attitude of the beginner. How do you ap-
proach aTop? How do you let him know you are interested
in having him take you on? What prearranged conditions
should you establish? What assurances should you get?
Because all these considerations will affect the tone of
whatever scene results from your initial exchange, it is impor-
tant to understand the "etiquette" of the situation.
Let's say you are totally, or virtually, inexperienced, but very
turned on by the prospect of SM action. You know you are
not qualified to be Top, even if your basic interests run in this
direction. You have found a man who excites you, and whom
you know to have been active in these pursuits long enough
to be qualified, and to know what he is doing. You want to
make it with him, and have in fact introduced yourself, or

36
gotten yourself introduced. Now what do you do? The most
direct course may be the most difficult: simply tell him you
would like to submit yourself to his instruction. If you can't
do this at the first face-to-face contact, you might— after a
few minutes of conversation— suggest that you would like to
talk to him again, sometime, and would it be okay to exchange
phone numbers? If your prospective Top is the least bit in-
terested, he will probably do as you request, if not actually
making the suggestion you most want to hear. If you do get
his phone number, call him. Don't wait until he has had time
to forget you. Don't wait for him to call you; the chances are
he won't.
There are many logistics involved in making these contacts,
as I am well aware, and you may have any number of alter-
natives.can
I only tell you— unless you are a refugee from
Mt. Olympus— you must display a bit of aggressiveness. The
worst the guy can do is tell you to get lost, and that, after
all, is not the end of the world. The one point I would most
strongly emphasize, and one you should really take to heart,
has to do with your attitude. Remember, you are approaching
a total stranger, asking him to initiate you into the most per-
sonal and intimate relationship of your life up to this point.
It is not the same as asking a "trick" to go home and have
a mutual suckee-f uckee with you. You are asking his permis-
sion to submit yourself to him. You do not tell him you are
considering a trial experience— that if he gives you the right
answers, you might go along with him. You may be thinking
this, and it may in fact be the action you plan to take, but
you don't say it in so many words. If the guy has anything
on the ball, he already knows it. But he is the Top, and the
decision must appear to be his. In some ways, your attitude
in approaching him for the scene should be much the same
you would display in asking your boss for a raise. Naturally,
if you put a little bedroom (or dungeon) in your tone, it couldn't
hurt. You might also drop a couple of "sir's" into your
dialogue; he'd have to be pretty dense not to pick up on that!
Because you are inexperienced, you really are not qualified
to make very many conditions other than the broad
categories. For instance, you may indicate your aversion to

37
fistfucking or heavy pain, or whatever frightens or turns you
off. Although you may have jacked off to elaborate fantasies
for years, you really do not know how any of these realities
are going to affect you. You have never been placed in pro-
longed bondage, where the choice of remaining or letting
yourself loose was not your own. You do not know how it is
going to feel if you are really subjected to a whipping, or any
other acts this man is likely to perform on your body. If you
trust him enough to go into the scene at all, you must do so
with the attitude that he is going to determine exactly where
the action will take you, and this attitude should be com-
municated tohim. It is wise to mention that you are only into
"safe sex," and get a commitment before going any further.
If you are fearful or anxious regarding the precise things
about to be done to you, this is only natural. Your prospec-
tive Top is aware of it; he's been there before, exactly where
you are at this moment. If he takes you on, he is as eager
as you to have a good scene, a good time, and he knows
that if he freaks you out, it isn't going to work. However, if
you go into the scene assuming the attitude with which many
people approach the dentist's chair— ready to overreact to
any hint of discomfort— you are going to fuck it up for yourself
and for him. This is the worst problem for beginners, and it
is the reason why many good Tops do not want to be bothered
with them. This is also the reason your quarry may slough
you off unless you convince him you are sincere and willing
to submit.
Once you have come to a mutual agreement with your pro-
spective Top, it is time to discuss limits. This should preferably
be done before you arrive at the locale of action, in the bar
where you met, in the car on the way home, or on the phone
if this is a scheduled thing. If necessary, you do it just before
things get started, but you do it concisely. You do not rattle
on, relating your full life history. You say what you have to
say, and you shut up! You might describe some of your fan-
tasies, ithere
f is an appropriate time and the Top seems in-
terested. Iwill
t give him some insight into your motivations
and areas of turn-on. However, you should not expect that
he is necessarily going to try to make each and every dream

38
come true. He is, after all, going into this with his own ex-
pectations ofpleasure, and with his own particular set of skills
and favorite activities.
As I mentioned in the last chapter, this has become an age
of specialization, for SM'ers as well as everyone else. You
will find most Tops have certain senses where they are at
their best, and certain things they particularly like to do. If
possible, simply let him do it; you will probably have a much
better time than by attempting to get him into your fantasies,
which may be totally unrealistic anyway. It is really impor-
tant that your Top know in advance of any physical limita-
tions: abad back, a tennis elbow, a serious allergy, asthma
or other respiratory difficulties, peptic ulcers, residual prob-
lems from surgery— in short, anything he should know to avoid
doing you an accidental injury.
To summarize: your attitude should be one of submission—
not only in your verbal expression, but within your own mind.
It is this condition, this mental frame of reference, an M has
to develop in order to enjoy the sessions he gets into. It is
an emotional set extremely difficult to describe, although ex-
perienced guys will know exactly what I mean. You have to
accept your physical and emotional surrender to another guy,
for however long you are together. If you are sufficiently in-
trigued togo with him, you must bring your mental processes
to the point of admitting to yourself that you are accepting
his Mastery. This may go against everything you normally
do and think in your regular day-to-day life, but for these few
moments of sexual exchange you are accepting a condition
you have previously only dreamed about To actually experience
it, you must enter into it emotionally as well as physically.
In order to achieve this mental state, many guys take some
kind of drug— the most common being MDA or half a tab of
acid. (See chapter on drugs if you do not know what these
are.) Although I really do not recommend the use of any drug,
I know that taking them in the initial session(s) has eased the
rite of passage for many. If the M does it, so be it. If the Top
does it, pick up your jockstrap and run. A spaced out or drunken
Top is dangerous, and this is one of the few conditions that
should make you break it off. Of course, a drunken M is a
39
pain in the ass, too. He's apt to fail asleep, or do some other
stupid thing to ruin the scene.
Okay, you've had your little discussion of limits, safe sex,
and physical disabilities, and you're standing at the door to
your Top's playroom (blackroom, dungeon, bedroom, hall
closet. . .whatever), and he tells you to strip. He makes no
move to take off his own clothes. You do not question; you
don't hesitate. You may blush if girlish modesty affects you,
but you do as he tells you. You take off your clothes, and
you fold them neatly, or hang them where he indicates. You
finish stripping, and you stand quietly in front of him,
preferably with your gaze on the floor. You do nothing else
until he tells you to do it, and from this moment on you keep
your mouth shut except to answer his specific questions, or
to allow your Master to make whatever use he desires of your
oral orifice.
This is the more or less classic opening— like the king's
gambit in chess. Not every Top will begin the same way, nor
am I suggesting he should. I use it merely as illustration of
attitude, not a specific game plan. In any event, from this point
on you are under your Top's control, and if you accept this
condition you will probably be led into an interesting scene.
Exactly what is going to happen to you is up to the guy you
are with; I will go into the many possibilities and variations
in due course. The one thing you are almost certainly going
to do, however, is to suck cock, and you will be expected to
do a proper job of it. While certainly not a specifically SM ac-
tivity, itis important and universal enough to merit a few
comments.
Much has been written on this subject. Some dissertations
make a lot of sense; others simply display the poor technique
of the writer— either in doing or telling. In an SM scene,
cocksucking is done with a slightly different twist, in that the
bottom is supposed to be doing his best to please the Top,
even at the cost of his own discomfort, and without expect-
ing reciprocation. There is also a good possibility of your
hands being restricted, and you will have to work strictly with
your lips and tongue. Sometimes a Top will require you to
open his fly and get his cock out— again without the use of
40
hands. In other cases, he may already have it out and have
been manipulating it himself before allowing you the privilege
of touching it. (And it is a privilege; don't forget to accept it
as such.) In such a case, watch how he does it, which parts
get his particular attention. It can give you a cue as to the
way he likes to be manipulated ... not a bad suggestion in
any C/S situation, since the way a man handles his cock in
a JO context is often the way he likes to have it sucked.
Although it is unlikely your Top is going to have been wank-
ing himself with great abandon before you get your chance,
you can still note how he strokes himself, how much atten-
tion he pays to the head and/or shaft, deep strokes or shallow,
etc.
If you are not already a competent cocksucker, I suggest
you learn. Practice with a soft dildo if the real thing isn't readily
available. Learn to take the whole length down your throat.
The gag reflex can be overcome with practice, the trick be-
ing to swallow at the right moment, to breathe before your
throat is blocked, and to hold the cockhead in the grip of your
hands until you need to take another breath. I absolutely
refuse to accept any excuse for an M's failure to learn this,
and if he comes to me several times without showing an im-
provement hecan expect trouble. In an early session, I may
let him have the use of his hands, but this is strictly a con-
cession to the learning process. A good M must learn this
one skill early on, and respond correctly in the sense of its
being second nature.
I notice in the widely touted Joy of Gay Sex, by Silverstein
and White (Simon and Schuster 1977), the "tunnel tech-
nique" issuggested if you have trouble taking the whole thing,
i.e., holding the crown in your mouth while jacking it off in
the middle. Well, this may do for a vanilla fluff, but it won't
pass muster with any Top who knows what good cocksuck-
ing can be. (It also presupposes that the cocksucker has the
use of his hands.) The good S&W also suggest that if the cock
is uncircumcised it is a good practice to slide the foreskin
back, with your hands before going completely down on it.
Outrageous! If you are privileged to suck a cock with a full,
thick foreskin, you worship it! You lick it, caress it with your
41
lips and tongue, maybe nibble at it gently before you slide
your tongue up inside the fold, running the tip around the
cockhead, all the while pulling the foreskin downward with
your lips to emphasize the enclosed sensation. Only after do-
ing this until you feel the satisfied response from your
Top . . . only then do you let the full length slide down your
throat, making no deliberate effort to pull back the foreskin
at any time. It will probably slide back on its own, but pulling
it back is completely unnecessary; and if you do it at all
sharply it causes your Top a stab of pain, for which he will
probably, with full justification, punish you severely.
This reminds me of my visit to Rome a few years back,
where I stayed with an older American gentleman who always
had an apartment full of street kids. On one occasion a cou-
ple of them put on a show for me. An extremely handsome,
exceptionally well-endowed Guarda got his magnificent un-
cut cock sucked by a pretty little ragamuffin, who apparently
made his living by this questionable technique. The kid fas-
tened his lips about the head, and violently jacked off the
shaft, never taking more than two or three inches into his
mouth. As I sat there watching in mounting horror, it was all
I could do to keep from getting up, shoving him out of the
way, and giving him a graphic illustration of how it should
have been done. Finally, when this amateur manipulation was
completed, I could see that fabulous shaft expanding and con-
tracting inthe throes of orgasm, after which the kid spat the
cream out in a handkerchief. Preposterous waste in those
pre-AIDS days! Later, during my stay, I had the opportunity
to enlighten the policeman on several points, including the
finer one of cocksucking, and he expressed his gratitude for
the graphic illustration. But the Romans, I found, were quite
consistent in this backward technique. Unfortunately there
was no way to institute a proper program of public educa-
tion. They will, I fear, remain forever inept in this particular
art. (If there should ever be a change for the better, I would
be more than pleased to see it demonstrated.)
The next most common, almost universal, component of
an SM session is bondage: if not throughout the entire scene,
it will generally be done for at least part of the time. In my
42
opinion it should be— especially with a beginner— done early
in the session. I say this, because being bound is one of the
most exciting sensations the guy can have, especially if he
has fantasized greatly before ever trying it. Done properly,
there is no pain involved, and the M can therefore accept it
more easily as a fulfillment of his preconceptions than almost
anything else that may happen to him. In fact, it is one of
the few activities where the reality can exactly match the
imagined details. It's a good starting point, since it is also
the symbolic act of complete submission for one man to per-
mit another to bind him. For this reason, he should be re-
strained ina way that renders him so completely helpless
that he can not free himself by his own efforts. ( I trust you
will excuse my switching here, from "speaking to the M" to
making suggestions for the Top. I'll keep going back and
forth, since various components apply more properly to one
than the other.)
A good Top should accomplish an initial bondage without
striking terror into the novice's heart. Depending on the sub-
ject, this can be done with the soothing talk one might ex-
pect from a cowboy saddling a young bronco for the first time.
If this isn't his style, he should handle it in some other equal-
ly unthreatening way. He may accomplish it all fairly quickly,
but he should never appear to be in a hurry. The Top's at-
titude through this initiation process has to evoke a sense
of confidence and reassurance, and at the same time allow
the beginner to accept his (for him) unusual role of subser-
vience. There will always be the exception— the kid who wants
it so badly he is not freaked out no matter what is done to
him; but these are few and far between. The average begin-
ner is quite apprehensive while the bonds are being placed
upon him; but if he is hot to go, he is also finding it extremely
exciting.
After the infamous Black Pipe raid, I spoke to one of the
21 guys arrested, who told me: "You know, I was scared
shitless when that pig hauled my hands behind my back and
put the cuffs on me, but can you believe I got a hard-on all
the same?" It is an interesting study in human psychology,
peculiar to SM, that many positive/negatives are firmly
43
coupled: fear/arousal, pain/pleasure, humiliation/satisfaction,
punishment/reward. Acceptance of the various combinations
is the key to understanding and enjoying the SM experience
that you have been fantasizing.
I know it isn't easy, and there really isn't any way to tell
you know to reach this state of mental equilibrium on the first
experience. It will becoma second nature after you have been
involved in a few sessions. I can only describe the appropriate
M attitude as one of acceptance, relaxation, and if possible
a turning off of the intellectual process to allow your body
to respond without any conscious process or cerebral com-
mand. You have, in effect, given your body to this man for
the time you are going to be together. You should be allow-
ing him to use it while you float along with him. Because it
is such a difficult condition to achieve the first time out, it is
one of the few occasions when I do not object strongly to the
use of light drugs by the M.
Because I am concerned here in trying to explain the proper
attitude on the part of the beginning M, I will leave a full
discussion of bondage for a later, more appropriate chapter.
How it is done should not really be the M's concern at this
point, and I am presupposing his submission to a Top with
a least a rudimentary knowledge of the subject. Suffice it to
say: the restraints should be fairly comfortable; I would cer-
tainly avoid any extremely esoteric or highly stretched posi-
tion that puts excessive strain on the M's body. Whether to
use leather wrist and ankle restraints, rope, or metal cuffs
will depend on the way the Top perceives the situation,
availability of equipment, etc.
I have a good friend who has been working with newcomers
for a long time, and really specializes in it. He likes young,
inexperienced guys, and to the best of my knowledge has
never had a really long term (over a year or two) relationship.
He claims that immediately putting the guy into suspension
is the most exciting thing you can do, and he tells me he has
never had one freak out on him. He uses padded leather cuffs
on the wrists and ankles, plus a leather belt around the waist.
He attaches the wrists first to hanging chains, then lifts one
foot at a time, attaching them to another pair of chains. The

44
M is completely suspended at this point, belly down, and
beginning to feel some strain in his arms and shoulders as
a final pair of chains is attached to rings on either side of the
belt. This takes most of the weight off his extremities, and
allows the guy to spar without any particular stress.
There is considerable debate over the use of a blindfold
in these early stages. It can sometimes help the M to gain
control over his own thought processes if all extraneous visual
stimuli are eliminated. It tends to place him into his own world,
somewhat detached from the lifespace of the Top. In a sense
this is a little akin to the situation in a shrink's office, where
the patient is placed on a couch looking at the ceiling while
he speaks to his therapist. It creates a certain detachment,
sometimes permitting an easier, less inhibited response. He
is in effect speaking into a void instead of staring into his in-
terrogator's eyes. But there is also some danger, in that the
person can become disassociated. There is also the poten-
tial problem of vertigo, especially if using amyl. In my own
experience, I have had guys respond very well to a blindfold,
and found them able to relax much more quickly. I have had
others simply freak. If a blindfold is used, it is well to ask,
"Are you okay," at fairly frequent intervals, until certain he
has adjusted to it.
If you are in this position, say: suspended, blindfolded, and
beginning to feel a little nauseated, let your Top know right
away. He should understand and take proper steps to remedy
the situation. Don't panic, and try not to break the rapport.
Always remember: the scene is a mutual experience . The Top
is trying to break you in, and is feeling his way in ascertain-
ing the limits which you may not be experienced enough to
state. He isn't out to do you any harm, and he is as anxious
as you are to have everything work. Remembering this, if he
does something you think you aren't going to like, don't re-
spond with an immediate protest. Let him do it. You may find
you like it, or at worst you will probably not find it as terrible
as you first imagined. (Think of all the foods you didn't like
as a kid, until you finally tried them as an adult.) If you re-
spond in a real "cry baby" fashion, you will probably turn
your Top off, and he may become disgusted enough to boot
45
you out before you discover whether your fantasies can ever
become reality.
Perhaps we should consider fantasies for a moment, since
it is often at this point that conflict between the real and the
imagined becomes critical. The worst problem I have found
with a beginner is his having jacked off for years to some
highly structured fantasy situation. This mental picture has
become so detailed and real for him, he is almost unable to
relate to anything else. He has also imagined it all without
the negatives, not realizing how strained certain bondage
positions can be, or how a belt across the ass or a whip
against the back can hurt. All the various components of the
fantasy are warm and wonderful; the reality is never going
to match it. The novice should accept this, and at the same
time try to conjure up the same emotional feeling he has had
during a JO session, while submitting himself to his first Top.
On the other side of the coin, the Top who is aware of these
preconditions is sometimes well advised to orient a good por-
tion of his scene about the M's genitals— assuming the M
is restrained so that he cannot touch them himself. I suggest
this because the beginner's background experience has been
focused on a highly genital-oriented fantasy. There has been
a conditioning process wherein the genital manipulation has
gone along with every moment of his heretofore highest sex-
ual experience. I have even gone so far as to tie the M's hands
in front of him, and threaten him with mayhem if he makes
himself cum. But I have allowed him to manipulate himself
during the early stages of his first session. I find this has
worked particularly well with a blindfolded subject, because
I know he is conjuring up the same visual images that have
become the central focus of his JO fantasies. In other words,
I attempt to make positive use of the exact psychological fac-
tors that often cause the worst problems. It also gives the
M a greater sense of my being on his side, despite his ex-
pectation and receipt of a certain degree of abuse.
Another longstanding debate is whether or not the S should
ever suck the M's cock. I feel that this is properly up to the
individual Top, but if there is ever a time to do it, the first ses-
sion with a novice is probably it. For the same reason I
46
suggest genital stimulation, sucking his dick can often help
him along. It may also surprise him enough to shock him out
of any beginning mental paralysis. I more or less consider
it a last resort, but it is something to consider. Whether a Top
will want to do this in a subsequent session is quite another
matter. He no longer has the excuse of doing it to quiet a
beginner's fears. I suggest: if it's something you feel an urge
to do, do it! It isn't hard to think up some reason to discipline
the M later for enticing you, tempting you, or somehow mak-
ing itnecessary for you to perform this "unmasterly" func-
tion. After all, this is a hedonistic pastime; there is no reason
to miss any of the possible pleasures. If your M has a big
juicy one you can't keep your hands (or mouth) off, you can
always punish him later for having a bigger piece of meat
than his Master.
It is important for the Top to keep in mind just how serious
an occasion this first session is for the novice. For a popular,
busy S, the scene may be just one more in a seemingly
endless series— nothing exceptional, nothing noteworthy.
Maybe the beginner is exceptionally attractive, maybe not.
He may be turning out to be more or less of a dud, or he may
be so inhibited that the scene is not going anyplace but down.
Regardless, the Top should recognize the responsibility he
has assumed when he agreed to train a beginner. Whereas
the S may not remember much about this exchange a year
or two from now, whatever he does to this kid is going to be
engraved on his memory as a milestone in his sexual history.
Where the session is to go after the initial bondage and
a little C/S action will vary so greatly from scene to scene,
and from one Top to another, I hesitate to make any sugges-
tions beyond broad categories. Maybe a light whipping ses-
sion, or some moderate tit and/or ball work would be in order.
Hot wax is sometimes a good activity, since it seems very
dramatic, but involves only minimal pain. I think anything
heavy is best reserved for a later session. Most of these ac-
tivities are covered in the chapter on Basic Specialties.
Just for illustrative purposes, let's take a look inside the
head of a typical novice and see how some of these initial
experiences might be perceived by him:

47
 The idea of being tied up and being forced to submit
to another guy had been something I thought about a great
deal. I used to look at the other men working out in the
gym every evening, and wonder what it would be like if
this one or that one were to take me in hand and literally
show me the ropes. I tricked a lot, and it was always easy
to get someone, because I had a good, trim body, and
I was never afraid to approach the guy I wanted in a bar.
I was dark haired, and sort of medium height, five foot
nine, and weighed around 150 pounds. Working out as
regularly as I did had given me good definition, although
I was always reticent to run around shirtless, or to other-
wise make a big display. I wouldn't say my face was my
fortune, but it didn't craek any mirrors and I had a decent
sized dick that worked as it was supposed to work, un-
fortunately without a foreskin.
When I had sex with another guy, I loved to get fucked,
and for a long time this satisfied my urging. Still, whenever
I went to bed alone I would have this wonderful head
trip.. .being bound, and getting worked over by a big bruiser
who would completely dominate me and force me to serve
him. I pictured him as a guy over six feet, with big arms
and hands, a chest and belly with good heavy definition,
sort of dark brown curly hair, both on his head and chest,
and a long tapering torso with a substantial set of dark
red genitals at the base. I usually pictured him as uncut
and thick, although I quickly went into a phase of imagery
where it really didn't matter... the big heavy tool all hard
and wound around with veins that stood out in stark relief
against the tight stretched skin.
I always imagined this Master had tied my hands behind
me; so I would lie on the bed on my back, the left arm
in the proper position, the right working gently on my own
dick. I usually had a bottle of amyl and a jar of lubricant
beside the bed, and as time went on I acquired a few pieces
of equipment: cock and ball toys mostly, harnesses and
ball stretchers, which I used alternately, or sometimes in
combination. I also got a couple of sets of tit clamps, and
finally a slave collar to which I attached a chain, running
48
it down, under the mattress, so it came up at the foot of
the bed and attached to a set of leather ankle restraints.
With all of this, I established almost a routine, where
I would fasten myself down by neck and ankles, stretch
my balls out tightly with a leather harness, grease up my
dick, take a hit of poppers, and lie back to picture my
Master working me over with a belt while I stroked myself
slowly to a climax. I got so I could hold off for a long time,
making the session last over half an hour, then a full hour.
I would sometimes cum, but not completely enough to
turn me off, then work it up and cum again. My record
was four times, although that only happened once. My
J.O. scene became so satisfying, I would sometimes go
out tricking, going either to my place or the other guy's;
but after I came home or my trick left, I would work myself
up for a solo scene, and go through my full fantasy trip
all over again.
Because I was always afraid the other guys would think
I was degenerate or deranged, I seldom tried to get into
any kind of bondage or SM stuff with them. On the few
occasions when I got up the nerve to ask, the other guy
responded just the way I was afraid he would. Only once
did I get a positive reaction, and that guy wanted me to
do it to him, which was exactly what I didn't want. Finally,
and quite by accident (because I was afraid of the leather
bars) I ran into the right guy.
I had been forced to leave my car for repair overnight,
and couldn't get a loaner. So I left the car and took a bus
to work on Thursday morning, planning to return home
the same way. I was a surveyor's assistant at the time,
so I wore workclothes and carried a hard hat as I sat on
the bus stop, planning to go first to the gym, then home.
A guy in a sharp, four wheel drive Ramcharger pulled up
and offered me a ride. He was a man I had seen on a cou-
ple of construction projects— a supervisor of some
kind— around 40, with a little bit of a beer belly beginning
to show on an otherwise muscular build. He had a large,
black mustache that was curled and pointed on the ends,
or I might not have recognized him without the yellow
49
hard hat he always wore on the job. Because I more or
less knew him, I accepted his offer and got into the truck.
The one outward concession I had made to my SM in-
terests was to wear the clump of keys I always had to
carry on a clip, hanging from my right hip. The big guy-
Alex, he reminded me as his big paw swallowed my
hand— made some smajl talk for several minutes, and
finally asked, "Do those keys mean anything?"
I could feel myself blush under the tan, but he had made
me feel comfortable enough... and somehow a little turned
on, that I sort of mumbled, "Er...well, they might." I sur-
prised myself, saying even this much, but it had provided
the clue Alex needed. With very little persuasion, he con-
vinced me that I should forego the gym for this one night,
and stop by his place for a beer. He lived not quite as far
as I did, so he would have let me off there anyway.
His place was an old Victorian style house on a side
street. It was fairly well tended, and I could see that Alex
had gone through phases of restoring one part, then
another, during the years he had owned it. He lived alone,
except for a large, rather surly German shepard named
Ayatollah. "Keeps the burglars out," Alex explained, let-
ting the dog into the back yard.
Sitting in his rear living room— den, really— sipping a
can of cold beer, Alex and I discussed his various proj-
ects around the house, and talked some about the jobs
on which we had both been working. There was definitely
a building sense of sexuality between us, and I was still
trying to make up my mind whether I wanted to get into
anything with this guy, who was really not the kind of man
I usually made it with. Maybe the reason I've never got-
ten what I wanted, I thought.
We were into our second beer, when Alex finally broke
the ice. "You never told me whether those keys really
mean you're an M, or not," he remarked softly.
I'm sure I really blushed this time; I felt the blood rush
to my head and pound against my temples for a moment.
I could even feel a trickle along my spine... the old hackles
rising, as I replied quite honestly, "I really don't know."
50
 "You want to find out?" he asked evenly.
Now my heart felt as if it were trying to rip through my
chest, and my palms began to sweat. But at the same time
I could feel a stir in my crotch, a warmth extending up-
ward into my belly. I took another swig of beer before I
said, "I guess I do." Without realizing it, I added action
to my words by looking down at the floor, because I was
unable to meet his gaze. I don't know whether it was the
beer, or just that I felt I had gotten to know him in the
few minutes we had spent talking, but Alex had assumed
a more imposing—and more handsome— aspect to me.
He had very light gray eyes... reminded me of an eagle,
and his sun-baked features were pleasantly symmetrical,
with high cheekbones and a long straight nose, fairly full
lips, and set of large, white teeth. His hair had receded
a bit, but it was curly and almost black, except for a tinge
of gray at the temples.
"You want to take a shower?" he asked unexpectedly.
I wondered for a moment if this might be his play to
get my clothes off, but I discarded the thought almost im-
mediately. Although he had been a little hesitant in his
approach to me in the beginning, we had both more or
less acknowledged an imminent interaction. I wanted to
use the bathroom, anyway; more than a shower, I really
needed a good douche if I was going to get fucked,
something I fully expected was going to be part of
whatever was to follow. I didn't know how to ask about
this, but the problem was solved as soon as I saw the
bathroom. He had a metal douche hose attached to the
shower head. Several unused plastic nozzles, still sealed
in factory sleeves, lay on a shelf next to the shower stall.
After escorting me to the door, Alex told me to "Go ahead;
make yourself at home." I thought he might be going to
come in with me, but he turned away, leaving the door
partway open.
I showered and cleaned myself out, glancing a couple
of times at the door, because I have always been reluc-
tant to have someone see me sitting on the toilet. But Alex
had left me completely alone. Finished, I wrapped a towel

51
around my waist and padded back to the den on bare feet.
"It's all yours," I said, as I entered the room, then stopped
in my tracks as I saw into the passageway beyond. Alex
had opened the door in the side of the room, which I had
barely noticed before. Through the opening I could see
a second, darkened room, with walls painted a dull black.
There was a muted thump of music, one of those elec-
tronic rock pieces they sometimes play in the baths. I
could see a glint of some metal objects, and there was
a length of chain hanging a couple of feet inside the
doorway.
Alex made no move toward the bathroom. Instead, he
stood up from his leather easy chair and walked up to me.
He was still wearing his jeans and black work boots, a
wide leather belt and blue workshirt with sleeves rolled
up past his elbows. I thought he had worn a T-shirt
underneath when he picked me up, but he must have
taken it off while I was out of the room. Without saying
anything, he gently but firmly encircled me with his
powerful arms and pressed his lips against mine. I could
feel the stubble on his chin and cheeks as he kissed me,
then tasted the tobacco and beer on his breath as his
tongue forced my mouth fully open. His arms tightened
hard around my upper body, and his demanding tongue
drove deeper inside. I don't know if he consciously
loosened the towel, but when he finally released his grip
my only covering dropped in a soggy mass about my feet,
and my prick shot up straight in front of me as soon as
the pressure of his body allowed it the freedom to move.
Alex took a step back, looked me over like a buyer at
a cattle sale, nodded approvingly, and inclined his head
toward the open door. "Okay, kid, let's go into my
playroom."
blackroom. He took hold of my dick and led me into his
When we got inside, he stood me with my back to the
wall, gripping my shoulders as he maneuvered me into
the position he wanted. I was standing more or less at
attention, with my arms down my sides, looking at him
and wondering what he was going to tell me. "Just stay

52
put," he said at length, and took a step backward to pull
the door shut. This cut off the light from the den, and left
us with only the amber glow of his wall lamps. The music
seemed louder, more engulfing, and somehow the whole
aspect of the scene had changed from day to night.
He questioned me, then, for a few minutes. Did I have
any physical problems, he asked. Had I ever had surgery.
Did I like grass and amyl, and finally, had anyone ever
tied me up before. Except for the question regarding grass
and amyl, I answered "no" to everything, but the last
question had made my cock take a fresh leap toward the
ceiling. I was also back to the pounding heart, this time
feeling it echoed in my temples and on either side of my
neck. My throat was as dry and "cottony" as if I had
smoked several joints, and I know I would have had to
go to the bathroom if I hadn't just douched myself so com-
pletely. Inshort, I was scared as badly as I ever remember
being scared, but I was also the most turned on. At this
moment, either emotion could have taken hold of me. If
he had simply unbuttoned his jeans and hauled out his
dick, I would have dropped to my knees and sucked it.
If he had hauled back as if to hit me, I would have bolted
and run from the room.
Somehow, Alex seemed to sense my state. He stood
in front of me, still fully dressed, slowly stroking my
shoulders and upper arms. He pulled me against him, and
muttered things like, "Just take it easy, now, kid. We're
going to do the things you've been dreaming about for
years." I felt myself melting into him, my naked body
against the hard buttons on his shirt, the big brass buckle
on his belt. My bare feet touched the dusty toes of his
steel reinforced safety boots, and I was made more aware
than ever of my complete nakedness, contrasted to his
being clothed. It gave me a sense of being a prisoner,
although he had only suggested restraining me. As he
held me, I became aware of his odor, a dusky, kind of dark
aroma— sweat, with maybe a little scent of machine oil,
the faint trace of the soap he had apparently used to wash
his hands and arms. I knew my mind was not very fo-
53
cused, ^nd I was wondering if he had used another
bathroom, maybe to shower, maybe to sponge-bath his
upper body. Then I felt him take hold of my wrists, pull
my arms together behind my back, and hold them there
with one great hand while the other reached for some-
thing hanging on the wall behind me. Within a few
seconds, he had encircled one of my wrists with a steel
restraint, paused a moment as if testing my response,
then moved my other wrist into position, securing it to
the first.
When he let go and backed away from me, I can hardly
describe the sensations that coursed through my body,
to say nothing of my mind. I was still apprehensive, but
not nearly as terrified now that I was actually cuffed and
helpless. It was as if the uncertainty of an impending deci-
sion had finally been made, and I was committed. He
started to play with my nipples before I had time for any
cognizant thought, which brought me back to such a state
of arousal I was afraid I was going to cum. As it was, I
could feel my erection straining upward, as if my cock
wanted to reach the center of my belly. I groaned and half
closed my eyes as his pressure increased, and he started
pulling downward on my tits. As the pressure grew almost
unbearable, I realized he was silently commanding me to
kneel, and without asking permission I went down onto
my knees.
My face was almost touching his fly as he let go of me
and stood upright. "Get it out," he said softly. "And don't
let me feel any teeth."
Unfastening the buttons, I did use my teeth, then
worked with my tongue to free the partially hardened
mass projecting down his left pants leg. I could feel the
moisture of sweat on his crinkly hairs, smell the deep,
heady aroma of his crotch. He's purposely not washed
it, I thought, and the realization only made me work the
harder to break it free. I finally felt it give, sensed the fra-
tional grasp again, holding it against the light moisture
of his thigh, moved it another short distance, aware he
was getting harder the more I worked on him. It was an

54
impossible task, now, as the fully erected mass poked
sideways along his upper leg, firmly trapped beneath the
sweaty denim. He must have taken pity on me, because
I could feel him unfasten his belt, fold back the flaps of
his fly. With a single scooping motion of his big hand,
he hefted the entire bulk of his genitals free, allowing his
balls to fall loose, to hang in an uneven position beneath
the steely projection of his dick.
He was uncut, but so hard the foreskin had retracted
better than halfway from the head. The entire crown was
wet with the dew of early arousal. The genital odor was
stronger, but I found it more appealing than I ever had
before. I went down on the head, sliding my tongue
around the crown until I felt his hand against the back
of my head. With a single, unhurried thrust he drove me
down on it. The whole mass slid into my throat, choking
me, bringing tears to my eyes. All the while he was com-
manding me to take it, not to resist. He was almost croon-
ing: 'That's it, man, that's it. Ah, good.. .take it.. .take it
all; swallow it. Love it; make love to it. Come on, punk,
swallow that dick!"
I sucked cock, then, for at least fifteen minutes, work-
ing harder to please him than I had ever done for anyone
else. Phlegm was running off my chin, making a puddle
on the rubber sheeting that covered the floor. My jaw
ached, and my back was starting to feel the strain of be-
ing pulled forward without the use of my hands to balance
me. I had just about reached the limit of endurance, when
he pulled free of my grasp, took hold of my shoulders and
raised me back to my feet. He took me in his arms again,
but I could feel his hands working almost immediately to
fasten a padlock onto my handcuffs, securing these to
a chain that hung from the ceiling behind me. Once I was
locked onto this, he crossed the room and took a fresh
can of beer from a portable cooler. He popped it open,
took a deep swig, then held it to my lips, pouring cold
fluid down my throat until it, too, gushed over my chin
and sloshed onto the floor to mingle with the rest of the
effluvium I had dribbled before. I could also feel the cold
55
liquid running down my chest and stomach, over my cock
and balls. As he took the empty can away, I stared into
his bird-of-prey eyes. He regarded me silently for a mo-
ment. "If you keep looking at me," he said, "I'm going
to blindfold you."
I looked down at the floor, not because I feared the
blindfold, but because I wanted to obey him. ..knew I had
better obey him. For just a moment, then, I felt another
stab of panic. I was helpless, chained and naked, and I
hardly knew this man. What was he going to do next? As
I cast my gaze downward, I could see that I had lost my
erection. My cock hung outward, arching down in lessen-
ing tumescence. As if responding to my thoughts, Alex
took hold of my dick in one hand, my balls in the other,
"This isn't very hard," he muttered. "Aren't you happy?"
Without waiting for an answer, he gave my balls a light
squeeze, twisting them half around while his fingers
kneaded the flesh of my dick. I started to get hard again,
which must have assured him I was okay.
He let go of me and went to the shelf where he had a
jumble of leather and metal devices. He came back with
several small leather harnesses in his hand. "Ever see
things like these before?" he asked.
One of the items he held up was a duplicate of my
favorite ball stretcher. "I have one of those," I replied,
inclining my head toward the item in question.
"And you wear it to jack off, thinking about getting your
ass whipped, don't you?" he countered. He grabbed my
balls, again, forcing them down in the sac as he began
fitting the harness around my scrotum. He exerted a lit-
tle greater pressure, "I asked you a question, punk!"
"Yes, sir, I do," I muttered.
He grunted something I couldn't hear, because he was
bent down, working to snap the harness around my balls.
When he stood up, my nuts were firmly stretched, and
my cock, which had been bounced around on the tops
of his hands, was fully erect again. However, I made the
mistake of looking him straight in the eye as his head
came level with mine. Without another word, he took a
56
piece of leather from the wall behind me, and snapped
it around my head. For a moment I lost my balance, but
his hands steadied me. I could feel his boot knock my feet
wider apart. This lowered my body just a bit so that the
chain attached to my cuffs became taut and helped to
orient me. I now had a feeling of even greater help-
les nes , agreater sense of being completely naked. He
pressed a double barrel inhaler into my nostrils, and I took
a long hit of amy I. Again I felt dizzy for just a moment,
but the clouds of vapor made me float. I was suddenly
in my own world, and as he continued to work on me,
playing with my nipples and my cock, I began to see
colors that weren't there, and found I was able to picture
my old fantasy Master... could feel him using me as Alex
began to make a more extensive exploration of my body.
He whipped me lightly with his belt, then with something
heavier— a paddle of some kind, used just against my ass.
He had turned me several times, never quickly, but just
enough to make me unsure of the direction I was facing.
Finally, I felt his fingers playing against my asshole,
lubricated digits slipping into me, loosening me up. For
a moment I was afraid he was going to fist me— something
I had never been turned on to, but instead he inserted
some kind of electrical vibrator. This was driving me wild,
as the object pulsed inside my body and his hands stroked
the areas where his belt and paddle had warmed the skin.
Finally, he slipped the vibrator out of me, and substituted
his cock.
He held me against his groin, my bound hands grazing
the top of his pubic hair, while he slipped his rod inside
my body, completely out, and reentered, repeating this
several times. Finally, he plunged in all the way and
started giving me a series of deep, hard thrusts as he held
me firmly against him with one hand; his other was
lubricated and working on my cock. He pounded his body
hard against me, making me slip away from him, then rush
to meet his thrusts until I was on the verge, and tried to
warn him. "I'm cumming...cumming," I groaned, but at
the same time I felt him increase his motions and

57
penetrate to an even deeper point within my body. I let
loose without concern, knowing he was giving me the
same. Still unable to see, I sagged backward against his
solid body, knowing I had finally come as close as I was
ever likely to, to the fantasy of my curly haired bruiser.

58
CHAPTER THREE— The Flexibility of Roles
Within the SM context, no subject is more confusing to so
many people than the perceived requirement that the par-
ticipant assume the role of Top or Bottom. In truth, while we
all have our preferences, most of us tend to flow with the tides
of time and circumstance. Although I had been increasingly
aware of this for some time, the results of my survey, done
in connection with this book, went far beyond my expecta-
tions. (Figures are in the last chapter.) The new openness,
with a great many guys showing their M colors in bars and
other gathering places, is immediately evident to anyone who
has been around the scene since/during the last decade. Ten
or twelve years ago, a great many bottom men were reluc-
tant to hang their keys on the right, and if they did so they
were sometimes subjected to a type or degree of scorn they
were not ready or able to handle. Whereas you still see a lot
more left-side signals than are really justified, the wearers,
in many instances, would be equally within their rights to wear
their keys on either side.
Many guys who give the outward signals of the Top, really
are Top in most of their exchanges— not necessarily by

59
choice, but as a result of circumstances. Exclusive Tops and
Bottoms do exist, but they are becoming less the norm as
increasing numbers of new people come into the scene and
sample the pleasures to be derived from dabbling in the ex-
periences ofeither side. I would also have expected to find
a greater number of men who were S in one context and M
in another— for instance, the Master in a whipping and bond-
age scene, but bottom in fistfucking, but it turns out if the
guy likes to give it in one situation, he is likely to enjoy receiving
the same type of action in another.
In drafting the questionnaire to acquire the final chapter
statistics, I fully expected to find a great many practicing Tops
having strong M fantasies. This was true, but I also found
the reverse— many guys who were practicing M's, display-
ing strong power needs. Nor was there any great consistency
to the patterns. The individual differences were enormous,
reaffirming my long-stated contention: predicting the behavior
of any individual on the basis of a class average is an ex-
tremely dubious business.
In this same context, most philosophers who seek to ex-
plain the division of society into "those born to be Masters
and those born to be slaves" are ignoring (or wrote prior to)
the emergence of our great consumer class. The values created
by this continuously growing phenomenon seem to have af-
fected our group as thoroughly as every other. The result is
simply a very large number of people in the middle of the
Master-slave spectrum. Other than seeking to explain it on
the basis of twice the range of activities, twice the potential
for enjoyment, I frankly admit I have no answer. Perhaps it
results from a great many new people in the scene who haven't
made up their minds one way or the other. Maybe the large
numbers of younger guys in the scene have created more
of a dilettante attitude. Or it may be the combination of all
of the above.
Recognizing these facts as real, we are forced to accept
them as a parameter in our discussion for a moment as I try
to help you explore the condition and meaning of a man's
being S or being M. Enlarging upon my remarks in the first
chapter, let me delve a little more thoroughly into the standard

60
definitions and preconceptions relating to these two terms.
Although "sadist" and "masochist" are quite commonly ex-
plored separately, I have never found a satisfactory, standard
definition for the sum of the two parts ... not even an adequate
academic definition, and certainly none which implies the proper
range and limits for our form of sexual exchange.
First, we have Noah's definitions. Webster's Third Inter-
national Dictionary states: sadism— {Comte Donatien Alphinsa
Francois de Sade, (died) 1814. Fr. soldier and pervert + ism.)
1 .a The infliction of pain upon a love object as a means of
obtaining sexual release— compare Masochism, b. The satisfac-
tion of outwardly directed destructive impulses as a source
of libidinal gratification, 2. a A delight in physical or mental
cruelty, b. excessive cruelty.
For the M, Noah is more verbose: masochism— (Leopold
von Sacher-Masoch (died) 1895 Ger. novelist + ism.) 1.a a
tendency to direct aggressive or destructive impulses against
one's own ego in order to reduce the anxiety attendant on
anticipated inevitable punishment or to gain positive gratification
through identification with a loved one who was formerly a
source of pain, b. a tendency to assume a role of sub-
missiveness and apparently to enjoy humiliation as the out-
come of feelings of worthlessness, c. a tendency to gain or
increase sexual gratification through the acceptance of physical
abuse or humiliation— compare ALGOLAGNIA d. a tendency
to take pleasure in physical or mental suffering inflicted by
oneself or by another or in the practice of extreme self-denial
or self-punishment: a taste for suffering (there's a broad streak
of puritan masochism in our character— K.S. Davis) 2. the
practice of masochistic tendencies (it was a form of
masochism ... to condemn oneself needlessly to the tantrums
of a capricious climate — Jean Stafford.)
I was amused to note that the S is branded a pervert, the
M is not, presumably a result of the "religious martyr" tradi-
tion. Because their love of pain and self-mortification is cloaked
in the mysteries of the Church, even Noah would never dare
call them perverts. If pressed, I wonder how he might have
defined the monks who often flagellated these penitents, back
in the good old days. Algolagnia, incidentally, is defined as:

61
the finding of sexual pleasure in inflicting or suffering pain.
This, I suppose, applies to the switch-hitter, which is to say
most of us, and comes as close as any to an academic term
for SM.
Thus, according to Webster, the S inflicts pain and humilia-
tion for his sexual gratification, and the M accepts them in
the corresponding circumstances. We might note that these
definitions apply equally to heterosexual, homosexual, and
all intermediate situations. But how closely does it narrow the
boundaries of our particular arena?
In the broadest sense, and depending upon the individual
emotional sets of the participants, it can apply to any human
interaction, wherein one person assumes a dominance over
another. If you consider it (symbolically) degrading to kneel
in front of another guy and suck his cock—with or without
the trappings of bondage or other aspects of SM— then you
and your partner have assumed a posture of sadist to
masochist. Likewise, the one who does the fucking is mak-
ing his partner the "punk," at least in the parlance of a street
gang or prison. Even Noah has been unable to place a hard
and fast definition on the essentials of human interaction,
such that they apply equally to each person, in each con-
ceivable situation.
But in a purely man-to-man sexual relationship, it should
not be beyond our ability to make some fundamental obser-
vations. More important than the actual activities, it is the
underlying relationship between the partners which qualifies
an exchange as SM. For instance, a B&D (bondage and
discipline) scene is, almost by definition, SM. The only cir-
cumstancecan
sI imagine where it would not quality might
be an actual punishment situation, with no (at least no overt)
sexual overtones. A brutal cop, for instance, might handcuff
his suspect and proceed to beat him up, possibly command-
ing his victim to stand straight or assume some humiliating
posture while being struck with fists, booted feet, or billy club.
In such an exchange you might stretch a point and say we
have the rudiments of B&D, but lack the elements of sexuality
as noted in Noah's definitions. Of course, if either cop or vic-
tim goes through the encounter with a roaring hard-on . . . ?

62
 I think this points up the weakness in the assumption made
by some who have written on this subject, postulating only
two conditions to qualify an exchange as being "SM": 1.)
sexuality; i.e., sexual stimulation on the part of both (or all)
partners; 2.) dominance on the part of one or more partners
over the other(s). There is, for instance, a definite dominance-
submission component in almost any sexual encounter. . .
even heterosexual intercourse in the missionary position.
Classically, the missionary lies on top and bangs his wife (who
may also be a missionary, I hasten to add, lest I be dubbed
a sexist). The old missionary is certainly dominating; his wife
is submitting. And, if virginity is to be assumed in their initial
encounter, we may presume a certain degree of pain-
giving/receiving is present during these early stages. Is this
SM?
Since few if any of us are missionaries, I think we might
more fruitfully turn our attention elsewhere. During the past
few years there has been a tremendous increase in the
popularity of the FF (fistfucking) scene. In the minds of many,
especially those who are not involved in either SM or FF, the
two are integral. In my opinion, they are not . . . except in the
very narrowest sense of our definitions. An FF scene is sex-
ual, and it manifests at least the physical elements of
dominance-submission. FF may take place in the course of
an SM exchange; but so might kissing, sucking, fucking, and
any number of other sexual activities. On the other hand, two
guys might get it on atop a comfortable bed, with no trap-
pings of bondage or dominance more delineated than a
regular vanilla fuck session. At the appropriate moment, the
host pulls out his can of Crisco, and the fisting proceeds as
a purely sensual, mutual exchange— no more SM than our
pair of missionaries. If we take B&D (bondage & discipline)
to be the basic SM scene, we see the dominant role clearly
defined from the submissive. Consider for a moment the lit-
tle vignette in the last chapter. These roles were clearly de-
fined, but the Top went to great lengths not to frighten or upset
the M. Such a degree of caution is normally not the case with
a pair of guys who are both experienced, and I do not mean
the little story to be a model for any advanced interaction.
63
Often, the ability of the Top to instill a modicum of anxiety
into his M is the pivot around which the rest of the scene
revolves. It is often very exciting for the bottom not to know
precisely what is going to happen to him, and to be constantly
pushed to the very limits of his endurance. Remember my
favorite quote from Oscar Wilde: It was like feasting with pan-
thers. The thrill was half the excitement.
It is the expectation of the unexpected that keeps the M
on his toes, and adds the necessary spice to his scene. By
the same token, this higher level of tension displayed by the
bottom provides the excitement and motivation for the Top
to do his best. Whether the M's anxiety stems merely from
his uncertainty over the placement or strength of the next
lash, or whether he is left in the dark as to the content of an
entire impending phase of activity, this mental condition main-
tains his essential tension. The only thing he should know
for certain is that his Top is not going to maim him or do any
serious injury. With this assurance, he should be able to sub-
mit and enjoy the scene.
The above, I admit, is somewhat idealized, and implies a
genuine bondage scene, as opposed to a session wherein
there may not be bondage, or where the M knows that as
soon as he says "stop" or "let me loose" the S will comply.
It is here we have to delineate the "rights of the M." Too often
a scene is aborted because the M refuses to leave the Top
alone to do his thing as best he can. "Sir, will you do this?"
or "Sir, will you do that?" gets very disconcerting for the man
who is supposedly in charge, and to whom the other has sup-
posedly submitted. Yet, there are some very successful
scenes in which the M really does control the action, or at
least shares in the decisions as he and his Top "work
together" to combine their ideas and turn the whole process
into a joint endeavour. Such is obviously not the classic
dominance-submissive fantasy-come-true of the great mastur-
batory imagination. In fact, I do not think it is too outrageous
to suggest that for many people, their truest (and purest) SM
experiences come, not in an actual scene with another guy,
but rather within their own minds . . . existing only with the JO
fantasies. Or, if nothing more, the JO fantasy has been the

64
first SM experience for most men, with all the rest becoming
real only at a later time. Onanism. Alone and in private, it
is possible to experience through mental imagery many thrill-
ing circumstances that are never actually going to occur. This
is true, of course, for people of all sexual persuasions. As
a possibly interesting aside, I am reminded of a conversa-
tion had
I with a born-again type minister a couple of years
ago. This worthy young man (30-35, 1 would guess) had at-
tended several public forums where I had been present as
an observer for the gay element in the district. During a social
moment after a meeting, the minister approached me and
drew me into a conversation where he attempted to point out
the biblical prohibitions against homosexuality. When he ran
out of breath, I asked him about his own sexual status. He
replied: "I am as yet unmarried, but I have never had sexual
relations with either a man or a woman. I am saving myself
for the woman I will eventually marry." While the smug smile
was still on his face after this pompous display of arrogant
superiority, I reminded him of Genesis 38:9 & 10, where the
Lord slew Onan for spilling his seed upon the gound. The
barb must have struck a vital nerve, because he turned very
red and abruptly spotted an acquaintance across the room,
excused himself and withdrew, leaving me to drink my cof-
fee in peace. The terrible hypocrisy regarding masturbation
has engrained inordinate guilt in many people— mercifully
less so within our community. In my survey only three men
lined off the section on JO fantasies as non-applicable.
Because of the very exotic nature of SM, our fantasies will
often range into areas that are physically possible, that do
occur with others every day, but which we either fear to try,
or have tried and know we cannot endure in reality. There
is also a tendency for a man who acts out almost exclusively
in one role— and who may be emotionally incapable of per-
forming adequately in the opposite— to have elaborate fan-
tasies about this "character opposite." The only outlet for
him is the JO scene.
I think it is probably most common for the active Top to
fantasize in private about being an M. To a lesser extent the
"exclusive" M may jack off to images of assuming the
65
dominant role, but more often than not he is going to dream
of a deeper degree of punishment or abuse than he is
physically or emotionally capable of taking. Then, outnumber-
ing them all, there is a group of guys who want (or think they
want) some heavy SM action, but know they are never ac-
tually going to do it. They live in small towns with no oppor-
tunities for acting out their desires; they are married men or
men with business, professional or social obligations that
preclude willingness to take a risk; they are too shy or guilt
ridden to approach another man; they have come to recognize
their true interests at an age they perceive as beyond the
reasonably active or desirable period of their lives; they
perceive themselves as^hysically unattractive or otherwise
lacking the ability to attract a partner. The catalogue of
reasons is probably as infinite as the number of men who
have lived the experience, and will live it in the future. But
these are SM oriented men, who act out their fantasies alone,
exclusively within their own minds.
Some purists will deny that this dream group is part of our
community. If we were to define ourselves as "activists on-
ly," this would be partially true— but only partially. Many of
this JO group have elaborate arrays of equipment, read and
collect our literature, and probably drink at our bars or join
in social activities available in their areas. Some will have had
at least a minimal physical experience. Using the Kinsey
methodology as precedent, there is ample justification for in-
cluding this JO group. In his earliest work, Kinsey defined
the homosexual population by including men who had "at
least one homosexual experience." This meant that he was
presupposing a basic sexual orientation on the basis of a
single act, because he knew how strong these urges had to
be in order to surface, against all the social pressures. He
also had to be aware of the many men who would deny any
homosexual interests, despite their strong drives in that direc-
tion. In other words, a fair percentage of his statistics had
to be based on an assumption of mental/emotional
orientation— not purely on physical acting out.
Thus, following the old adage "he also serves who only
stands and waits," I feel we have to include the exclusive,
66
or near exclusive JO artist as a legitimate part of our SM com-
munity. The exotic content of not only the fantasies but the
JO scenes themselves will rival the heaviest action ever to
occur between two or more participants.
I know, from my experience in mail order, a good deal of
the equipment sold for SM purposes is going to be used in
a JO context. All types of cock and ball harnesses, tit clamps,
dildos, gags and hoods, even wrist and ankle restraints, are
going to become props for this game of self-bondage and
humiliation. The fantasies may come largely from the fertile
brain of the practicioner, but I also know how much is con-
tributed bystories in books, and drawings or photos in
magazines. Interestingly enough, this may seem to presume
an M role on the part of the onanist, and I think that a major-
ity of fantasies probably are M. For the guy who does his head
trip on being Top, it is more difficult to achieve a solo fan-
tasy; but it can be done, and certainly is. The realm of imagi-
nation islimited only by the talent of the dreamer, unlike a
reality situation, where physical partners determine the limits
of one's action.
Although the practice of jacking-off would seem to be rela-
tively hazard-free, I would estimate that at least as many
emergency room cases are generated by these games as by
the foibles of the "true activists." Unable to obtain properly
designed materials, or unwilling to face the "embarrassment"
of acquiring them, people have been known to use all man-
ner of inadequate and dangerous substitutes. If I had a buck
for every finger ring the emergency interns have cut off some-
one's dick because he got it on and couldn't get it off, I could
retire and spend all my time doing these things instead of
writing about them. We have many instances of objects lodged
in the penile canal or anus; and also have an unfortunate
number of deaths, many the result of strangulation, because
a guy has hanged himself by accident in the course of a heavy
JO trip. In the past, I have avoided doing a number on elec-
tricity, because I was afraid to encourage anyone to try it and
either electrocute himself or fry his balls. Of course, most of
these incidents are logged in the coroner's files as suicide,
either because the medical examiner did not understand the

67
circumstances, or preferred to ignore them. Take for exam-
ple the excerpts from a couple of letters I received, and
published with photo illustrations in one of my early Treasuries
of SM:
...my greatest range of experiences are solitary. I have,
on occasion, done all of the following, although not
necessarily in this sequence. Note also that this spans
the time from 1 1 until the present— 28, and includes seven
years of gay experiences as well. Here follows the tale:
I started, I think, by wrapping a "A-inch Venetian blind
cord around my cock and balls, consecutive turns in-
creasing the tension on the skin of my sac. Higher turns
went around my cock only, up to the tip, then many more
turns were added up and down until all that could be seen
was a mass of cord. There were 55 or 60 feet of cord, so
it made quite a bulge. I could not masturbate at these
times, but generally came off by moving about, bumping
the cord with my thighs.
Twice, when time permitted, I went to the basement
and, with the same cord, tied one end around my cock
and balls, trailing the end through my legs, up over my
head, around a pipe near the ceiling, and back down in
front of me. I stood on a chair, made a loop at foot height,
then placed both feet in it and tightened it. I then, in ef-
fect, sat down, raising my feet from the chair and mov-
ing itout of the way. An interesting feeling, swinging by
my cock and feet, plus the friction up the groove of my
ass. Recovery was effected by returning the chair and
straightening the legs, or by pulling at the cock rope un-
til my shoulders were on the floor. I could then, by main-
taining agrip on that rope, slip it around my shoulder and
thence off my cock. I might note that apart from a slightly
abrased ass-crack, I suffered no ill effects. I was,
however, young and not every heavy.
I have introduced all manner of things into my ass. I
believe it started with one or two marbles, then three or
four, then up to a dozen, I had also a steel ball about one
inch in diameter which I first just pushed in. Then, for ef-
fect, put it in the freezer for a half hour before pushing
68
it in. I also tried boiling it for five to ten minutes before
pushing it in. Ice cubes were fair game also, but the sharp
edges and points sometimes hurt until they melted off. I
was using soda pop bottles regularly, basically sitting on
them until (I assumed) the bones prevented further entry.
It was at that time I discovered lubrication, and with that
found the pop bottles would go much farther in. I would
masturbate during entry, and ejaculation meant removal.
I have had a vibrator (IV2 by 12 inches) almost all the way
in (say 1 1 inches). I have introduced a trailer hitch ball (1
inch diameter, plus flange, shaft and bolt) all the way in,
and I have also held it at the entrance until I came,
masturbating.
I have clamped, tied, stretched, pulled, and restricted
my balls in every way I can think of. I took a photo of myself
(Polaroid, via mirror) in a position similar to the one shown
in one of your books, nuts tied to a doorknob and leaning
out backward. I have tied a bucket to my nuts and filled
it slowly with water. What a feeling! This after seeing a drawing
of a cowboy pouring water into a boot tied to another's nuts.
Once I stretched a rubber bumper from a pin-ball machine
around my sac! I had to cut it off, as I could not get a grip
on it; it was too tight. I have clamped my sac in a large
metal vise bolted to a table. In this case, the nuts hung
in the middle; immobility was the point. Later I found it
amusing to put the vise on a chair, clamp myself in and
tighten until the handle was vertical, then push the end
up into my ass and move the vise further onto the chair
so that the handle would not drop down. Masturbation
followed.
After I read Leather Ad., Vol. 1, I had to try to impale
myself. This is technically not impossible, but requires a
measure of imagination and/or self-control. I did it by fix-
ing abroomstick in the aforementioned vise on the floor.
Then, by placing a few books beside it, it was possible to
raise then lower myself onto it. By kicking the books out
of range, a measure of satisfaction was obtained; however,
escape merely meant leaning over and upsetting the vise.
At one point in my life I experimented with electricity.

69
Two D cells provide a charge you can feel, provided the
contact points are good and fairly close together— large
bolt up the ass and a wire down the cock, for instance.
I also played with a telephone supply battery, which had
variable voltages up to 45 V. I eventually worked up to
the full 45 V across the points above. Ejaculation was almost
instantaneous.
Another mania I have is "private exhibition." I love to
strip naked in the woods, leaving my clothes scattered
in enough places to make it difficult to find them again.
I then climb a tree, or enter an abandoned barn or house,
or just wander across the fields. Once I hung upside-down
by my knees from a tree branch, within sound of some
kids playing. As I masturbated, the possibility of discovery
made it all the more exciting. Shooting down past my own
face had its own thrill, as well.
My tits have been used quite a bit in the past few years.
I normally use a set of matched, spring-type clothes pins,
and recently found that wrapping elastic bands around
the business end gives a more painful pinch. Pulling on
my tits is erotic, as well. Just a few weeks ago I decided
to pierce one. I used a hypodermic needle. With two clothes
pins on one tit, the pain of penetration was minimal. I was
so excited by the time it was through, I could hardly con-
trol myself. However, once it was in place, I couldn't even
feel it. I slipped a clean wire through, and removed the
needle, hoping to form a loop with the wire. But it was
too stiff and wouldn't bend properly. Eventually I removed
it, too.
I also have a choke chain and two small locks, along
with three sizes of snap-rings as used for loose leaf binders.
The largest of these fits nicely over cock and balls. The
medium is excellent around the balls, and the smallest
goes around the cock, Just under the head. (I'm circum-
cised.) The choke chain is then fitted on my ankles, where
it leaves about five inches between. The center link is locked
to one of the above rings— which one being dependent
upon my mood. Unless it is the smaller, I then mastur-
bate to completion. I can see many other possibilities for
70
choke chains, and plan to get a few more, as well as some
additional locks.
I think this will perhaps give you an idea that if I can
imagine a situation, and can think of a way into and a way
out of it, I will do it. I don't know why this is, possibly
because I see these situations as challenges to my skill
and ingenuity.
As you can see, JO behavior is limited only by the bounds
of physical possibility and the imagination of the masturbator.
I would add a word of caution, however, since my correspond-
ent did just about everything I warn people not to do. Before
attempting any of his acrobatics, I suggest you study the ap-
propriate sections in the pages to come, and note the dangers
I try to point out when these activities are performed in a
scene. Still, I think it would be difficult to deny that this man
was engaged in some form of SM. The following example
is from a man who relies more heavily on fantasy in the course
of his exercises, or at least ties these more pointedly into his
descriptions:
...so I'll attempt to describe some of my thoughts and
fantasies that I go through while I'm jacking off. Many of
these seem so real as I visualize them, I've written them
down as if they really happened. Sometimes, of course,
I'm looking at a picture of a guy who fits the description
I'm thinking about.
I really get my rocks off for tall, muscular, blond, Scan-
dinavian orSS types— either that, or the opposite: really
dark (Italian, Greek, Spanish type men) who wear big,
dirty engineer boots and smoke big cigars. Unfortunate-
ly, there aren't very many handsome or tough-looking
guys who fit that description. My fantasies and my own
drawings usually have one or more of these guys beating
me up, crucifying me (with spikes through the hands and
feet), whipping me with 20-foot black bull whips or chains,
sticking nails and tacks all over my body with their fists
or with hammers, stomping me with their boots, running
over me (staked out, spreadeagle, with heavy hawsers)
with big motorcycles, jeeps or trucks, pissing on my face,
etc. On this last point, I imagine myself in a scene where

71
my only function is to be chained kneeling to the floor
or ground, hands tied behind me, and be pissed on by
all Masters of a gang, motorcycle club, etc., and even by
their slaves, in various ways— e.g., with one boot on my
chest or face. I imagine myself being forced to eat all the
ashes from the cigars being smoked by the Masters,
maybe being forced to keep their boots clean by licking
them (if scene is taking place in a field, for instance). I
see myself being used as a living example of various lowly
utilitarian objects, such as ashtrays, spittoons, mats for
dirty boots, rags, brooms, punching bags, pincushions,
targets, wedges (to gejt a bike or jeep out of the mud), etc.
I keep myself bound at all times, with just enough
latitude so I can get my hand onto my cock, although ty-
ing myself so I can't touch it is sometimes a prelude to
a wilder sensation later. I do this in such a way as to leave
the maximum portion of my body available to my imagi-
nary Master. I like to visualize myself being lifted above
the ground. Besides crosses of various types, I like the
idea of large wooden wheels with wood spokes and steel
rims, beams, ceiling hangings, stone wall chainings, etc.
One detail, for example, is balancing my slave's body on
a foot-high beam with nails in it, with my face close to
the Master's face or hands, to be convenient for use as
an ashtray (in the mouth), ready to receive his slaps or
for my whole body to be accessible as a hassock or boot
rest.
Another scene I imagine is being a slave, bound with
ropes to a round beam over a wood fire, rotated as if on
a spit until the ropes bum through and... In general, I pic-
ture myself as enduring the heaviest pain and humilia-
tion, while my Master enjoys the greatest comfort and
pleasure.
There are other fantasies, such as being climbed on
with boots, spurs, belts and jackets with nails and studs,
while I'm tied to a cross or beam, etc. Many times I bind
myself down tightly and think of these things, and if my
mental projections are not interrupted I am able to come
without ever having to actually touch my cock.
72
 I can only leave it to the reader to decide for himself whether
or not he wishes to include JO artists such as these as a part
of the SM community. I rather think they should be, but since
it is no more than an academic matter, you are free and
welcome to your own opinion.
The majority of us would prefer to do our thing(s) with another
guy. Thus, the man who is to become an active SM participant
will graduate from the purely JO scene, and progress into his
first interaction.

To define an M. For many people, especially those not in-

volved inSM themselves, there is a tendency to confuse an
M with a slave. The two are decidedly not the same, although
the one may become the other. At times many M's pretend,
play at being slaves during the course of a scene. But a slave
is a personality of an entirely different, and rare, quality. I think
this was a difference most of our politico-ethical philosophers
were unable to perceive in their treatises on slaves in our society.
I will develop my ideas on this subject at greater length in the
chapter on Masters and slaves. Here, we are concerned with
theM.
Whereas slavery (real slavery or the mental orientation that
makes a man a voluntary slave) is a permanent condition, sex-
ual masochism is a transitory state. The man who allows you
to bind him, and grovels at your feet tonight, may well become
Master to someone else next week. He may actually leave your
blackroom on Monday morning with your welts still glowing on
his ass, travel directly to an office building where he takes his
seat (perhaps painfully) behind a desk, and assumes a posi-
tion of control and domination over his subordinates. In other
words, the man who acts as an M in a sexual context may not
be a submissive person in any other aspect of his existence —
business, social, or within his family circle. Understanding this
very important distinction right from the beginning will greatly
facilitate your further comprehension of your own and other
guys' behavior, needs, and drives.
The reason I consider SM to be the ultimate catharsis, in the
full sense of a psychiatric unburdening, is the opportunity it
allows for role playing. In life, we are frequently cast into our
73
socioeconomic state by forces beyond our control and end
up behaving in the manner prescribed by these cir-
cumstances. Inthe blackroom, we act out exactly the emo-
tions, and attempt to fulfill the fantasies, that society will not
permit us to experience— this behavior being considered in-
appropriate, even illegal. For both Top and bottom, the sex-
ual exchange is an unleashing of these otherwise hidden,
suppressed desires— lusts, if you will.
In trying to analyze the components which go to make up
the composite human being we refer to as an "M," we must
acknowledge a second dichotomy, producing two very diverse
types of bottom (neither of which is necessarily a slave). On
the one hand we have the guy who wants sex right now, and
goes to a bar or answers an ad to get it. He is seeking a one-
night stand, or at most a limited series of scenes with the
same Top. Perhaps only vaguely, in the depths of his sub-
conscious, ihe
s looking for anything more. This is the stand-
ard, garden variety bottom. Let's call him "Type A." He may
have a vivid, tightly organized set of sexual fantasies he would
like to have fulfilled, or he may be so experienced and ver-
satile that any of several situations will satisfy him... or at least
sate him for the moment. We'll come back to him a bit fur-
ther on.
Our Type B masochist really wants to be mastered, possibly
enslaved, but certainly made completely subject to the will
of his Master. He has (or perceives himself as having) the
emotional capability for a long-term, total involvement. He is
also apt to be the less satisfied of the two types— not because
of his particular psychological set, but because he has
searched for a long time without finding the man or the situa-
tion he really wants. After a while, his condition may appear
hopeless, and he may react to this appearance of chronic
failure by becoming despondent, even suicidal. He is unwill-
ing to compromise, and if he goes for any great length of time
in this condition his own fantasies may become so intricate
and so firmly entrenched that no one will ever be able to fulfill
them. If he's lucky, sometime in the early states of his search
he will find a Master with whom he is able to form a long-
term relationship— even to playing at a slave status,
74
something he really can never be, because he still retains
too strong an ego (concept of self), preventing him from tak-
ing that final step toward total submission.
This "Type B" is a very special personality, and he tends
to have a more consistent pschological profile with his fellows
than our Type A. Remembering how dangerous it is to
generalize when discussing human behavior and patterns of
emotion, still, generally speaking, Type B is more likely to
be nonaggressive in his everyday life, submissive in most
social, business or professional situations, and emotionally
incapable— in his early stages— of even brief or isolated
periods of assuming the Master's role in a sexual encounter.
In this sense, he is in a halfway position between the Type
A and the slave— unable to move in either direction, and very
unhappy unless he is able to find an adequate counterpart.
These are often the guys we think of as "heavy bottoms,"
and who are classified in my survey results as being among
the total M's.
Our Type A bottom is less troubled by his environment—
as long as he lives in an area where sexual contacts are
available and relatively easy to find. Because there are so
many men in this category, there is a tremendously diverse
assortment of personalities. The most successful are probably
fairly aggressive in seeking a partner, and may manifest this
aggressiveness in other aspects of their lives. In fact, some
may be so self-assertive in other social situations that the
need to be an M is a subconscious manifestation of a need
to be punished, or at least a perceived need to reverse the
everyday mode during the hours of sexual play. Of course,
there are almost as many reasons for wanting to be M as there
are men seeking the role. I would venture to say that most
are motivated by a complex of drives, some conscious, some
not. Let me try to enumerate a few of the most common:
a. The need to be admired. Even if the man is not particu-
larly attractive by others' standards, his self-perception may
be such that he visualizes himself as a handsome captive
in bondage. The fact that another man desires to put him into
this situation only reinforces this perception.
b. The need to submit. If the M is normally aggressive, he
75
may feel that the only way to take a subservient role is to be
bound and "forced" into it. By surrendering his physical
freedom to the control of another he has placed himself in
the situation where "he can't do anything about it."
c. The need to be accepted. The M may not have been
particularly successful in his personal or love relationships,
and may feel the enveloping arms of whatever his Master
uses to bind him are the strongest and most physical evidence
of acceptance he can find. It may also have enabled him to
enter into a sexual exchange with a man whom he desires,
but sees no other way to attract (not that he is going to sub-
mit to this unless he otherwise enjoys the sensation). The fact
that he "got" this guy reaffirms his self-perception of attrac-
tiveness and desirability.
d. The need to prove his masculinity. Although this motiva-
tion ismore readily apparent in a man desiring to be a Top,
it also holds for a bottom. By placing himself in the position
of helplessness and subservience, the M is proving he "can
take it like a man." The heavier the punishment he can en-
dure, the more this perception is reinforced.
There are a number of other "needs," all of which a shrink
might lump together under the title "the need to be loved."
From certain psychiatric viewpoints this may be a legitimate
assessment, although I feel the shades of difference are im-
portant, determining the more precise course of the M's
responses, and thus affect the behavior of the Top. I do not
think it is possible to ignore the very important influence the
M's fantasies are going to have on any reciprocal scene.
Although many a Topman will maintain it is he who deter-
mines the action, regardless of the M's desires, this is not
necessarily true. But for a moment, let's stick with our ex-
amination ofthe M.
I would like to go a little further in discussing the differences
between these two basic types of M, in case my previous
remarks may seem superficial, and in need of a little clarifica-
tion. Naturally, I stick with my overall philosophy: "every man
is an individual, and there is no "average man," so my
general grouping is simply intended as a starting point for
an examination of two diverse psychological approaches
76
toward the same physical end, namely the bottom man in an
SM scene. To help you understand why you may possess
these desires, and achieve pleasure from an activity incom-
prehensible toso many, you must realize how completely your
basic needs, desires, and fears are shared by other people.
Although your own particular set of these components may
be as individual as your fingerprints, no single component
is unique. Neither do I mean to imply that either of the two
M types is more desirable or more "noble" than the other.
Within the small "inner circle" of SM people, there is a tendency
to put down the weekend practitioner as a dilettante. Still,
without this large body of people entering into the game for
these limited periods, the whole scene would soon wither away.
Not everyone is able to live in leather, or to maintain a lifestyle
where the tods of his trade form the basic furnishings of his home!
I have a little acquaintance whom I shall call Penishead.
I'll use him as the horrible example from time to time, to il-
lustrate byhis foibles the pitfalls of an SM existence. He has
a penchant for doing everything wrong— his most serious faux
pas being an attempt to perform as a twenty-year-old as he
approaches his mid-forties. A classic Type A bottom, he has
not been able to mature within these parameters; consequently,
he lives all his waking hours in bars and baths, or someone
else's bedroom (because he doesn't have one of his own).
He works at menial jobs, because no one else will hire him,
and stays at these only long enough to gain the necessary
credits at the Unemployment Office. Fortunately, he is the
rare exception. Most M's resolve their sexual needs with the
other aspects of their lives. In this respect, the superficiality
of their earlier interests have made it easier for them to adapt— to
play the game when it is convenient to do so, perhaps play-
ing Top as well as bottom, but to withdraw from time to time
without suffering any serious complications.
The Type B man has a more serious problem. For him, the
SM experience is of paramount importance. He is emotionally
incapable of playing Top, although he may try it from time
to time if he has no alternative other than complete absten-
tion. But unless his desire for a permanent, heavy relation-
ship is fulfilled, he will never be satisfied. He, too, may
77
eventually be forced to seek an alternative place to expend
his energies, but he always retains his basic desire for
something he can never have. It is a difficult path, and one
where I can offer little encouragement. I receive letters all
the time from people in this and other dilemmas, but when
I recognize this particular state of affairs I am at a loss and
can only refer the guy to the Sacher-Masoch philosphy: The
SM relationship is doomed to failure from the start, because
the dynamics of the Top and the bottom become conflicting
factors as the bottom demands an ever heavier abuse, and
the Top develops a more loving and protective feeling toward
his subject. In the end they have to destroy the SM bonds,
because their individualrequirements can not be reconciled.
Thus the M's quest is for a will-o'-the-wisp, unless he is able
to recognize the impossibility of ever fulfilling his physical and
emotional fantasies in a single lifelong love match.
The most successful alternatives I have seen did not solve
the problem by allowing the men to achieve the sexual release
they desired, but by the men sublimating these needs into
some other activity, and, as they matured, coming to accept
their SM urgings as secondary. A young guy may not wish
to acknowledge this condition, but it has become reality for
his older soul mates. A lot of guys establish an asexual rela-
tionship with a living partner, delving into SM as the oppor-
tunity arises. Otherwise, they may fall back on the JO
fantasy— my reason for giving it so much space and including
it as a legitimate alternative to actual interaction. Decreased
sexual activity with advancing years is certainly not unique
to SM; it is almost (statistically) universal within the general
population.
A little later, I'm going to examine some facets of M
behavior that may seem to contradict some of my more
depressing conclusions. But I would remind you that the bulk
of active people fall in the 20 to 50 category, the peak years
being 30 to 45. These guys are not all dying off at age 45
to 50. Where are they, if not active within our scene? But
human personality tends to be very contradictory and in-
dividualistic. Enjoy your relationships as they come, and try
not to be too obsessed with 78
your distant future. You can't
predict it, and if you retain a reasonable degree of mental
equilibrium, you'll make it. The, differences in people and the
uncertainty we face provide the spice for living and interacting
with our friends and sex mates. So now, having dissected
the M, let's take a quick look at his counterpart.
The Topman. The S, being the exact counterpart of the
M, must possess the skills and the qualities of personality
necessary to sustain a good scene. Despite the expectations
of some of his potential partners, he is not a robot designed
by nature to serve the fantasies of the bottom. He must learn
how to cope with these often* unrealistic expectations, and
how to deflect the M's fantasies into the realm of feasibility.
He must be a bit of a psychologist; to be really good he should
also be a bit of a wizard. But before all else, he must have
served an apprenticeship. I know there are successful Tops
who claim never to have been bottom. I know a couple who
trained, serving as junior S, under an excellent Master. I sup-
pose you could learn the basics by reading about them, if
you are exceptionally astute. But as for the rest of you mor-
tals who aspire to play Top, I tell you in all sincerity: To be
worth anything, you must know how it feels, and the only way
you can properly experience this is to be on the bottom.
Neither am I speaking here to a man who is necessarily
an exclusive S. There are very few. At this point in my SM
career I must have met over half of the foremost Tops in the
Western World. I have yet to hear one deny that he occa-
sionally plays the other side. It is not only a valuable cathar-
sis, a sort of expiation of his sin of pride, but also a very
valuable learning experience. I think the greatest danger to
a man who works almost exclusively as Top is the tendency
to fall into a rut... to do the same thing so many times, he bores
himself, to say nothing of his M.
As to the type of man who normally functions in this capa-
city, we have an interesting* range of personalities, as well
as an infinite variety of physical types. To try to draw some
general conclusions is difficult, but I would say: as a group,
they tend to be older than the M's (also taken as a group),
but this is understandable. Most guys go through the M period
first, then progess to being Top, if they ever take the step
79
at all. There are also a number of guys functioning as Tops
because they have a strong attraction to SM, but for one
reason or another are no longer capable of functioning as
M's— either for physical reasons, or because their ap-
pearance issuch that they have difficulty attracting Masters,
but far less attracting bottoms. It isn't always purely by choice,
then, that a guy takes this role; a truth that many people would
prefer to deny.
The second basic skill is using a belt or whip, or whatever
tool is going to come into play as a punishment or discipline
device. With the specifics to come later, I advance this as
a "must" skill for the Top to master. He should also under-
stand much of the material we will cover in the chapter on
setting the scene, because the way he causes the M to
perceive him is going to depend almost as much on the en-
vironment he creates as off the actual performance.
Following this, I would venture to suggest the third basic
skill
take as
the "creation
time and ofcare
the toproper
make self-image."
himself look The Top should
as much as he
can like the man he knows his M is seeking. We do this more
or less as a matter of course when we go into a bar to cruise.
But I have seen some very sloppy appearances when it has
been prearranged and the M comes a-calling. Sloppy (or
raunchy) is okay, if that's the name of your game. Otherwise,
the Top should be aware of the effect he is creating. I
remember one nice little M telling me about his encounter
with a friend to whom I had referred him: "The guy was okay,
and he knew what he was doing, all right. But, you know,
it bothered me all through the scene.. .he's sort of bald, you
know, but I don't care about that, except that he'd apparently
scratched himself and had a big scab in the middle of his
head the whole time."
Another kid told me, in referring to his previous long-term
Top: "It was really hot in the beginning, because he just
seemed to be everything I'd ever dreamed about. But as I
kept coming back to him, he gradually stopped wearing his
leather, and even got to a point where he'd slop out to meet
me in house slippers and shorts, I just couldn't turn on to
him anymore."
80
 Other specific skills depend on the area of specialty.
Regardless of the specific focus of his scene, the Top should
be familiar with his equipment, know where it is in his
blackroom, and be prepared to use it with an air of assurance.
If embarking on a new course, the surest way to know how
something is going to work is to use it on yourself, in private,
before you try it one someone else.
Having spent a lot of time trying to ascertain the reasons
for the man's assumption of the M role, I do not wish to leave
the reader with the impression that I see a man falling into
the role of Top purely by default or accident. For the part-
time S this may be partly the case: i.e., he performs as Top
more or less as a second choice. And using our Type A-Type
B dichotomy, again, I'd call this the Type A Top. He would
just as soon perform either way, and really may prefer the
bottom position. But he is not the man we normally regard
as a true Top. I'll conclude this chapter with a little disserta-
tion on that phenomenon.
The Type B Top is that relatively rare, almost endangered
species, a man who really achieves a tremendous emotional
lift by dominating another man, and has little or no interest
in playing the other side. All through his apprenticeship, when
he was being tutored by the Tops who came before him, he
has eagerly anticipated graduating into the status of this man
who is putting him through his paces. His fantasies have been
focused, even more strongly, on the dominant role. It would
be difficult to deny the presence of strong "power needs"
in this man, and he may be a dominant personality in all the
rest of his day-to-day existence. If circumstances prevent him
from fulfilling some of these needs outside the sexual arena,
his motivation to perform the S role is going to be all the
stronger.
Despite the ususal range of personality types to be ex-
pected inany given group of men, there is a certain consis-
tency among the majority of Tops I have known. There is a
strong aggresive component in their basic personalities,
although those who are active and successful in their sex play
tend not to manifest these aggressive tendencies as hostility.
They have a genuine need to dominate, to be the boss; as

81
long as they are able to fulfill this need they seem to attain
a great degree of emotional stability. There are not statistics
available to support or deny my "armchair reflections," but
I feel that the level of intelligence among the good, active Tops
would be very high.
For those who would like to be Top, but seldom if ever have
the opportunity, it is difficult to make an evaluation, because
they rarely come to the attention of other people who are ac-
tive inSM circles. Whereas many frustrated M's can be iden-
tified, the unsuccessful Tops tend to be far less visible. I would
guess (that's really all I can do) that they are turning their
energies into other, asexual directions— perhaps concen-
trating on business or other financially oriented goals, or
engaging in some type of physical activity. I really do not
believe the group to be very large, however— certainly tiny
in relation to the M population.
For the successful Top, there is a tremendous thrill in
watching the results of his skills and planning come to frui-
tion in the writhing, painfully pleasurable responses of the
bottom. He achieves his own pleasure from, and takes pride
in, both the interaction in the blackroom and the respect and
adoration he obtains as a result of his burgeoning reputa-
tion. There is also a social reward, in that Tops all over the
Western World seem to be in contact with one another— more
so today than a number of years ago, but even in the era of
more restricted activity and communication, many were still
aware of each other. These men also tend to be the backbone
or core of the in-group. Although, despite the opinion of unin-
formed outsiders who see us as some kind of social menace,
there really is no international organization of our practi-
tioners. This informal network of communciation among the
foremost Tops is the closest thing to it we have ever achieved.
If I seem to imply that a great deal of the satisfaction derived
by a Top is not directly related to sexual (physical) sensa-
tion,do
I not deny it. If the S chooses to enjoy these physical
sensations, he certainly can steer his scene in that direction.
Many do, but others go through an entire session without
climax, or delay climax until the very end of several hours
of play. Yet, throughout there is usually a strong sexual

82
arousal and anticipation. The Top's ability to prolong his even-
tual ejaculation may very well be a function of intellect and
his own internal discipline.
The behavior of the classic Top is very different from the
performance of a man who plays the role only part time, or
assumes it simply by default because he has turned on to
another guy who prevails upon him to act as Master. This
latter situation is by far more common, but is often only a
marginal SM interaction— for instance a highly dope-oriented
fistfucking scene. In so many cases, clubs and baths that
started out to be SM gathering places have instead turned
into FF parlors or cocksucking grounds. The lack of true SM
activity has clouded the definitions in the minds of many peo-
ple. But, since we have difficulty defining it for ourselves, who
can blame them?
The M as Master. I would like to make a few remarks, here,
for the benefit of the average, non-classic practitioner who
just likes to get it on with another guy in the trappings of SM
and leather. He is not particularly concerned with role
classifications; he simply has a pair of aching balls and a hot
dick, and he wants to do it! His basic inclinations are to be
bottom, but he knows how hard it is to find a good, qualified
Top. So, despite his own strong urgings to submit, the (Type
A) M assumes the role of Master.
Poor little upside-down cake,
Your troubles never stop;
Because little upside-down cake,
Your bottom is on your top.
It may, to the uninitiated, seem a terrible contradiction in
terms to cast the M as Master, but it is probably one of the
most common situations to be found in any survey of the SM
scene. Regardless of how we cut that upside-down cake, we
still have a situation where the M's greatly outnumber the
Tops. If we only count as Tops those who are really qualified,
the ratio becomes even more lopsided. If a guy is cruising
in a leatherbar, his chances of picking up a bottom are always
greatest, despite the "colors" shown by either of these poten-
tial partners, especially if the guy zeroes in on the young pret-
ties. However it happens, it is a common situation to find two
83
bottoms in a scene, which means one of them is going to
play Top.
Beyond the remarks I have already made regarding the
skills, etc., that a Top should display, there is not a hell of
a lot I can impart by way of sage advice in the area of actual
physical performance. But attitude is another thing altogether,
and I would like to make a couple of observations to help the
guy who finds himself in these circumstances, and who may
feel disappointed or inadequate — or both.
Even if your experience as Top is extremely limited, or nil,
there is no need to panic at the prospect of assuming the
role. Remember the best things that happened to you as an
M, and try to translate these into the scene you give this other
guy. In many ways, you are in a better position to render the
proper degree of punishment than a Top who hasn't been
on the receiving end for a long while. Your memories are
fresh; you know how it feels. Try it, and watch the reaction
you produce. If you know the more intricate activities to be
beyond you, temper the scene to the areas where you do feel
comfortable. Remember, you were attracted to this guy in
the first place, or you wouldn't be with him. He has sur-
rendered the S role to you, and thus has left the direction
of the scene in your hands. It is up to you to select the precise
activities you are going to try. This gives you an advantage
you do not normally have.
The real trick is to "psych" yourself into it. Use props if
necessary— a mirror, if available. Put on a cock and ball
harness, or even a ball stretcher if this is going to excite you.
But above all, take it as an opportunity to try something you
do not normally have a chance to do. Don't force yourself
into specific actions that don't turn you on, or you feel you
can't pull off. In most cases, the worst mistake you can make
is trying to pretend you are really a Top. Let the other guy
know you're an M, but assure him that you are going to make
him feel the things you've felt. It will take the heaviest burden
off your shoulders, even if it does remove a bit of mystery
from the scene. Once you've tried it, you might find it more
enjoyable than you expected. You've probably had some S
fantasies; now is the time to try acting them out. The worst
* 84
you can do is fuck up one session, which happens to the best
of us, from time to time.

In trying to assess and describe any one of the different

roles, you almost have to "freeze frame" it. The different
players change constantly, some sliding from one role to the
other, or getting more intensely into a certain specialty for
limited periods. There are always new people coming into
the scene, and others dropping out. There are fads growing
and fading within the SM community, and external pressures
extended upon it by laws or changing social and economic
conditions. My growing tendency is to regard the guys I meet
and know as SM people first, and as Tops or bottoms only
secondarily. If I do not see a particular person for several
years, chances are when I run into him again he will not be
in the same position vis-a-vis his role and specialties. Even
his degree of participation, or depth of involvement, will prob-
ably have changed. Certainly, his perceptions of himself and
his fellow players will be different. Nothing is static, and no
roles, rules or requirements are carved in stone. It's all human
flesh, which may or may not be weak, but is certainly
malleable.

85
CHAPTER FOUR— Fetish and Fantasy
In the heart of the active practitioner or the JO artist, an
admixture of fetish and fantasy must exist. In addition to the
tendency to fantasize, which we have already acknowledged,
this means that for most SM oriented guys there is a strong,
maybe obsessive attraction to a fetish symbol. In light of re-
cent psychiatric theory, this is no longer considered neces-
sarily unhealthy. But in Freud's Dictionary of Psychoanalysis
we find the following definition:
Fetish, Fetishism— This abnormality, which can be counted
as one of the perversions, is, as is well known, based upon
the patient, who is almost always male, not recognizing the
fact that women have no penis— a fact which is exceedingly
distasteful to him because of the evidence it affords of the
possibility of being castrated himself. He therefore rejects
the perception of his own senses, which showed him that
women's genitals lack a penis, and holds fast to the opposite
conviction. The rejected perception, however, does not re-
main entirely without effects, for, in spite of everything, the
patient has not the courage to assert that he really saw a
penis. He snatches hold of something else instead— a part

86
 of the body or some other object— and attributes to it the
role of the penis which he cannot do without. It is usually
something that he actually saw at the moment at which he
saw the woman's genitals, or it is something which can
suitably serve as a symbolic substitute for the penis. Now
it would not be right to describe this process which accom-
panies the formation of a fetish as a split in the ego; it is
a compromise formed with the aid of displacement, such
as we have been familiar with in dreams.
The reader is then referred to the chapter on Sexual Object,
Unfit Substitutes for, where the most common (19th Century
heterosexual) fetish objects are listed: foot, hair, some inani-
mate object, fragments of clothing, underwear, etc. Male-to-
male SM behavior, like psychoanalysis itself, has come a long
way since the days of Dr. Freud. If the good doctor could be
transported through time to view the activities at New York
City's Mineshaft or San Francisco's Caldron, I think he would
revise his definition of fetish to include first and foremost the
very object itself; i.e., the penis, the fully erect cock, and
secondly (for some) the foreskin. For us, these are certainly
the primary objects of fetish fascination. However, in classic
jargon this is considered a fixation, rather than a fetish; but
the reason for making the distinction is to reconcile this fasci-
nation with the penis to the rest of Freud's definition. I just
want you to make note of this, so you don't think I'm even
more ignorant than I really am, in calling a guy's fascination
and preoccupation with another guy's cock, a fetish. For our
purposes, the classic differentiation is irrelevant.
Narrowing the field to our own specific areas, we find the
most common fetishes (i.e., those physical objects that form
the central focus of our fantasies, and toward which our
heated arousal drives us) to be: boots and leather (clothing
or toys), uniforms, piss or (rarely) excrement, bindings of
various types (ropes, chains, metal restraints, leather thongs,
nylon belts, etc.). However, I would venture to suggest that
our fetish attractions go beyond mere physical objects and
can include abstractions, in what I would call "situational
fetishes." Among these situational fetishes, I would list: bond-
age (regardless of its physical materials), humiliation, punish-

87
ment, and possibly the act of submission itsel*. All these
abstractions, like their physical counterparts, form the cen-
tral focus of your fantasies or mine— or some other SM
guy's— and the fixation on them in these circumstances is
the same. In fact, it is the actual use of most fetish items that
form the core of the fantasy for us, not the object itself.
All right, you say, so much for the shrink bullshit! What the
hell are you talking about? Freud says it's "abnormal" and
calls it a perversion. Are you agreeing with him? Well, far be
it from me to contradict the Great Master Shrink. I would
merely note that he wrote on the basis of a doctor treating
patients, operating largely within the Jewish community of
19th Century Vienna. Genius that he was, I am sure he saw
beyond the limits of this restricted field, but I doubt even he
would have been able to project far enough into the future
to visualize the extent of our present-day leather-SM com-
munity, and the formation of our group into a legitimate social
component, set within another subculture (the gay community
in general).
First, we should try to examine the "anatomy of a fetish."
In Games People Play, Dr. Eric Berne refers to sexual fetishes
as "symptomatic of a confused child," and implies that they
are "treated accordingly." Again, I should remind the reader
that most psychiatric opinions come from men who are used
to dealing with people (patients) who have come to them as
a result of being unable to cope with their environments—
the definition of mental illness. I do not think it is right or fair
to class any group of successfully functioning individuals in
the same category. If the games you are playing are helping
to keep you off the shrink's couch, then for you the game
is healthy. Only if you fail to satisfy your own needs, or
seriously jeopardize another person's right to his own life
space (as does a rapist or other sexual criminal) can you
honestly be considered perverse or mentally ill. At least, that's
the way I see it.
"Abnormal" is another relative term, in that it implies some-
one is (in some respect) at great variance from the norm. If
the norm of your society is to be attracted to pussy instead
of cock, then you are— within that society— abnormal. But at
88
this point we have a large enough population of our own peo-
ple to have formed our own society within the greater one.
In a leatherbar on a Saturday night, Jerry Falwell would be
the abnormal one.
I would now like to make a few comments on several of
the more popular fetishes, remembering that there are many
I do not have time or space to cover, some I would be bound
to overlook, anyway, and some of the subjects I do cover
would fall into my "situational fetish" category.
Boots and Leather. The look, the smell, the feel of
leather— individually or in combination— form the basis of our
most universal and widely acknowledged fetish. Molded into
a boot, it becomes the very symbol of SM, and hardly any
logo or other symbolic device is complete without it. The boot
has, for many generations, been a strong symbol of masculin-
ity. (Remember the fight they had in Texas, when the politi-
cians tried to take boots away from police uniforms?) See-
ing boots or leather clothing on another guy can be a tremen-
dous turn-on, but wearing them yourself is a sensation that
has to be experienced to be fully appreciated. I do not feel
there is much involvement with the source in this attraction,
since most leather is cowhide. Yet it is not just the appear-
ance; our modern factories churn out all kinds of plastic im-
itations which don't excite us (unless they are clever enough
to fool us).
There is a texture to leather, and a smell, that nothing can
imitate, and the true leather-lover can always tell whether it's
real or not. A large part of the uniform fetish, which I'll cover
in greater detail further on, probably stems from the boots
that form a part of most. There is an emphasis, here, on
power— probably one of the strong components we sense as
being related to the wearing of boots, and to a lesser extent,
the wearing of leather in general.
Even those long horsehide coats we see in vintage movies
of the Nazi era can be quite a turn-on. I remember one night
in a San Francisco bar, watching a little guy in one of these
Wehrmacht coats wandering around, and being quite at-
tracted tohim until I got up close and he whispered: "I vould
lek to shpink you."
89
 The implements of bondage. The fetish attraction of these
items is fairly obvious, and probably more common among
M's. The fantasy of having the bonds placed on his body di-
rects many a guy toward this fetish. I have noticed a fairly
consistent correlation between interest in one form of bond-
age device with interest in another, although it is not univer-
sal. Some guys turn on to ropes, but not to handcuffs, etc.
To some extent, I think this is partially a situational fetish,
because it is the use of the restraints as much as their
physical form that attracts someone.
Humiliation. Strictly a situational fetish, and the heart of
many fantasies, humiliation is one of the most popular sub-
jects for the setting,
In a private JO artistthe'toTop
imagine, andtheactivists
requires bottom toto practice.
perform
a series of degrading activities: grovelling at his feet, licking
his boots, taking his piss. Simply being naked and bound
while the S is full dressed is a condition of humiliation, as
is the "dirty talk" sessions so many guys enjoy.
Public humiliation is less common, but sometimes can be
even more exciting— if only accomplished within the imagina-
tion. recently
I had the suggestion made to me that a good
public humiliation scene would be to cut a hole in the M's
left (front) pants pocket. He is then thumbcuffed with his hand
in his pocket, other end fastened around his balls. Taken out
in public, he appears only to have his hand in his pocket, but
he knows he can't remove it. (I would emphasize, for pur-
poses ofdefinition, it is the fixated idea and the anticipation
of these acts, rather than the acts themselves that would con-
stitute the fetish.)
Gloves. This less common fetish can be quite compelling
for the guy who turns on to the idea. Gloves cover the hands
of the Master, and hence represent the source from which
all the bondage is applied or the punishment given. Leather
is the most popular material to be visualized, but black nylon
or silk may also become associated in some people's minds
with a highly charged sexual connotation. This fetish tends
to be more individualistic than many others, being less glam-
orized instories and pictures; thus it will be manifested only
by those who have had actual experience of a gloved hand

90
doing something wonderful.
Nylon. This material, particularly black nylon, may take on
various different meanings for different people. More com-
mon as a heterosexual fetish (because many women's
undergarments are made of it), we still find a number of gay
SM guys turned on by the feel and texture. It may be in the
form of gloves, various kinds of jockstraps (posing straps, etc.)
or other clothing— particularly shirts. Probably more popular
as something the fetishist will wear himself than visualize on
someone else, it qualifies for our list, although of secondary
importance.
Jockstraps. Good, raunchy, sweaty jockstraps, fresh off
the body of some humpy young athlete, are about as high
on the list of fetish items as you can get. Used as gags in
some scenes, or worn second-hand (or second-crotch), they
are strongly attractive to a great many guys. In one gym I
used to belong to, the members were supplied only with open
cubby holes to leave their things overnight. It was almost
impossible to leave a jockstrap there one day and find it the
next. And not many of these guys were active SM people,
although 99 percent of them were gay.
Exhibitionism/voyeurism. Again a situational fetish, both
exhibitionism (performing or going naked in public) and
voyeurism (watching the exhibitionist) are popular fantasies,
with a far smaller number of guys actually acting them out.
One of the most common dreams, or nightmares experienced
by people of all sexual orientations is the image of oneself
naked amidst throngs of fully dressed people. It can be closely
affiliated with humiliation, but true exhibitionism is more akin
to a stage performance than to being the victim of a ritual
put-down. In heterosexual terms, the flasher is an exhibition-
ist; the Peeping Tom is a voyeur. In our terms, the guy who
goes into a bar with his ass hanging out the back of his chaps
is an exhibitionist; the guy who sits back and watches him
is the voyeur. When the guy jacks off to the idea of either,
he is fixating on the experience, making it a fetish, just as
the guy who actually does it takes as much or more pleasure
in anticipating the act, or thinking back on it.
Incest— father/son. The theme more people have re-
91
quested me to wrte about than any other is that of a father
and son getting it on in an SM setting. Very few have been
privileged to experience this activity, but thousands of guys
have thought about it in their JO fantasies. One of the most
popular novels I ever wrote was The Long Leather Cord, an
account of a father and his two sons mixing it up in the
dungeon and sundry other locales. There are very heavy
Freudian overtones to this fetish, or fixation as he would have
called it, involving the Oedipal complex, etc. I don't think the
psychiatric theory is very important to most of us, but the at-
traction icompelling
s for those who share it. Students of social
psychology may recall the theories of matrist and patrist
societies, the one creating problems with homosexuality, the
other with incest. Interesting that we should combine the two.
The uniform fetish. "Clothing makes the man" is an old
sales pitch within the tailoring industry, although I must con-
fessdo
I not know where the line originated. Within the realm
of uniform wearers and worshippers, the ancient maxim takes
on a more intense and heightened meaning.
Whereas most men who are into the leather & SM scene
have some hang-up, or at least a fetish attraction to boots
and leather clothing, there is a fairly large (and growing) seg-
ment of our population who get very excited by the sight of
a man in a uniform or some other special costume. The ob-
vious include: US Marine, 13-button Navy, military in general,
police and Highway Patrol, Nazi SS (black) or SA (brown),
period US or British cavalry with high, shiny boots. Most of
these project not only the aura of authority, but also the spit
and polish endemic to their respective services. However,
I would also classify a second group of clothing attractions
(fetishes) in this general category.
While recognizing that the basic, subconscious motivation
for the attraction is probably different, the end result is the
same sort of "hero worship." In this secondary group I would
list: cowboys, construction workers with their hard hats, tele-
phone linemen, firemen, motorcyclists. If you are blessed (or
afflicted) with this lusl, you can probably add significantly to
the lists I've given.
I think these latter fixations are interesting enough to de-
92
serve a little extra space in addition to our earlier general dis-
cus ion. (Ialso
t leads me to a vignette you may enjoy shar-
ing.) Although the general elements of any fetish apply to an
attraction for uniforms, the focus is a little different in that
the wearing or worshipping of a uniform implies a need to
project or accept authority.
Many guys who wear a uniform will tell you they simply en-
joy the feel of it, and think it makes them look good, which
is often perfectly true. They are not interested in finding any
deep insight or meaning. In another sense, the wearing of
a uniform is narcissistic: the guy is turned on by his own im-
age, or what he imagines that image to be. This is also harm-
less, and would constitute no more than a sublimed varia-
tion on a JO scene. I don't mean this as a put-down, not in
any sense; but we might as well understand what we're do-
ing and why we're doing it, while we go about discussing the
pleasure to be derived from it. We should also note that some
of these guys are seriously interested in the historical and
sociological aspects of uniforms and the organizations they
represent.
After talking to a number of men who are very involved in
the uniform scene, and who belong to one or more of the
clubs devoted to it, I find about the same distribution of sex-
ual tastes (Top vs. bottom) as I would expect within the leather
group as a whole. A fair number of guys who are not into SM
wear their uniforms much as other non-SM'ers wear leather.
Detailed statistics are not available, but I do know many uni-
form guys who engaged in SM activities, and many more guys
who fixate (fantasize) on the uniform. This also fringes on the
subject of military discipline, but that is covered in its own
section.
The cowboy. To some guys, the image of the Old West
is the ultimate turn-on . . .the ten-gallon Stetson, the stained
and worn brown leather chaps, and faded dusty jeans, with
pointed-collar shirt and sharp toe, high-heel boots. Inside
these trapping we perceive the lean, wind-lashed face, tanned
brown as saddle leather, a hard trim body, and a dangling
set of genitals down the left thigh. The perfect cowboy should
be stoic and reticent in speech, tough and able to take it or
93
dish it out ... in short, a man's man, who loves his horse and
his fellow wranglers, but disdains women or anything soft and
frilly. The fantasy is almost universal, although not necessarily
everyone's first choice. But who'd be picky, if such a hunk
were to turn up at your favorite leatherbar, or better yet on
your doorstep?
Because of the tendency to reject brown leather, we see
fewer guys trying to assume this image than might otherwise
be the case. However, if you have the guts and the looks to
pull it off, I'm sure you would not be lacking in takers. Perhaps
another deterrent to the wearing of cowboy gear is the number
of "Urban Cowboy" detractors, who tend to laugh at the cow-
boy who has to arrive at the bar in a car, bus, or taxi, and
who has never had more than a hard cock between his legs—
wouldn't know how to get onto a horse, much less ride it. Yet
most of us wear what is basically motorcycle gear, and only
a few would be able to handle themselves on a Harley (or
even a Yamaha). If you want to be a cowboy. . .
I can't resist the temptation to add a postscript to this chap-
ter: a vignette which many of my regular readers have asked
for after I alluded to it in one of my bi-monthly Newsletters,
but never described in detail. It sounds almost too good to
be true, but it is one of the few nonfictional sex epics ever
to flow from my pen . . .typewriter. In fact, the reason I have
never told it before is because it was too much akin to one
of my greatest "success stories." (I haven't been called the
Horatio Alger of SM for nothing.) Please note, however, that
the following incident took place a couple of years before our
current health crisis.
Every August, if feasible, I take a trip from Los Angeles
to Santa Fe, New Mexico, to spend a couple of weeks in
an orgy of opera, mountain air, and green chili cuisine. I
usually drive there in my van with a couple of friends.
On this occasion, one of my companions left from Santa
Fe on a business trip, going on to New York. The other
was called home early, on a family emergency. This left
me to make the return drive alone. Being subject only to
my own whims, instead of the usual three-way consensus,
I drove to Flagstaff, Arizona, then south on the main high-

94
way, cutting off just before Phoenix. At dusk, I made that
magnificent drive along a secondary road to Wickenburg,
where I stopped for dinner. I had intended to find a motel
for the night, but I wasn't particularly tired, having had
a very comfortable drive with the stereo providing great
music while the air conditioner kept the desert heat out
of the van. I decided to go on a little farther, with Blythe
(on the California-Arizona border) as my projected goal.
The resulting drive was another relaxing, almost sen-
sual experience. The air was just the temperature to drive
with the windows open. The traffic was light, and the dry
breeze carried that certain scent one finds only in the
American southwest desert. I had been listening to a se-
ries of Mozart horn and woodwind concertos, so I was
mellow as a three-joint high. Just outside Blythe, I saw
a large rest area, with a number of big rigs pulled up along
the roadside. There were a few other vehicles in the park-
ing area, but all were dark, as were the eighteen-wheelers.
I assumed all the occupants were asleep, since it was
close to midnight. (Overnight sleeping in your car is legal
in Arizona rest stops.) As I parked my van off to the side,
away from the other vehicles, I saw the silhouette of a
slender guy in cowboy garb, standing on the steps in front
of the men's room. By the time I had locked the van and
looked up again, he was gone.
I went into the John, which was one of those fairly new
concrete and native wood structures, clean and well main-
tained, with electric lights, proper plumbing and an over-
powering smell of disinfectant. Standing at the urinal,
there was no way to miss the gaping glory hole into the
first stall. Through this, I could see quite a healthy cock
being manipulated above a field of faded blue denim. As
I stood there draining myself, there was a brief blur of
motion, after which a marvelously hooded cockhead tried
to squeeze itself through the hole— an aperture I would
have considered wholly adequate to accommodate any
modest to average endowment. In this instance, it was
several centimeters too small for passage of the proffered
pecker.
95
 At this point, I had no way to know exactly what was
attached to the other end of this stanchion, but everything
I had seen thus far had been encouraging enough to jus-
tify my further exploration. Shaking off the final drops,
and stuffing everything back into my Levi's, I moved
around to the door of the booth, which I found unlocked.
I was about to push it open, when I realized that the other
booth was also occupied. I had the door open just enough
to catch a glimpse of a guy inside, who appeared to be
the same man I had spotted in the entrance a few minutes
before. Now, I have to admit that I was in a bit of a quan-
dary. I'm not much for tearooms, anyway, because the
action is so unsatisfactory— hurried, cramped, and always
with the anticipation of intrusion. It is also a favorite place
for police entrapment, although the location and hour
seemed to mitigate against the latter possibility. Still, the
circumstances were not quite right, so I merely ex-
changed glances with the occupant of the booth and
withdrew.
Returning to the van, I opened the side doors, took a
frosty can of beer from the cooler, and propped myself
against the front bumper to watch. A few moments later
my quarry emerged, and I had my first really good look
at him. The jeans and plaid shirt I had already observed
inside were filled with a trim, firm-looking body. He had
black curly hair, peeking out from the sides of a black,
low-brimmed cowboy hat. His boots were the standard
pointed toe variety, with thick high heels, all rather
scarred and scuffed. Except for a small black mustache,
he was clean shaven, with high cheekbones and wide
mouth with moderately narrow lips. In all he was as close
to the porno flick fantasy as one could ever hope to en-
counter in real life.
As he sauntered toward the van, I greeted him and of-
fered him a beer. "Sure," he replied. "I just want to check
on my friend." With this, he continued toward a dusty
black pickup, with a double horse trailer attached behind.
You can imagine my thoughts as I watched him check the
hitch and reach inside to adjust something. When I saw
96
him start back toward the van, I moved to the side, where
the doors stood open to the night air. With a rolling gait,
he came around to accept the beer and sit on the carpeted
floor beside me, our legs dangling out.
"The boss'd kill me if anything happened to those
horses," he said. "They're on the way to a show in Cali-
fornia." With this, he dropped his hand across my thigh.
"Great night, isn't it?" he added.
It certainly was! I had already shifted the suitcases and
miscellaneous gear to the far back of the van, so when
we slid inside there was plenty of room to move around.
By his motions, I had picked up from the start that what
he really wanted was to get fucked, and from here it was
not very difficult to persuade him that having his hands
tied behind his back would only serve to heighten the
pleasure. Because I had parked at the end of the paved
area, some distance from the nearest car, and with the
right side of my van toward the vacant ground beyond
the building, we left that door open to the warm breeze
and went at it. He had been a little apprehensive about
the rope, but when he was completely stripped and lying
on the carpet, I reached under him, between his legs, and
felt a reassuringly firm projection. I rubbed the double
length of belt across his ass, testing his reaction. Either
he wanted it, or didn't know exactly what I intended, be-
cause he only moaned and rocked a little from side to
side. When I started a light whipping, he hissed and
groaned more loudly, so I paused long enough to fumble
a leather "pecker gag" out of my traveling kit, and forced
the latex portion between his lips. Again, he gave a sug-
gestion ofresistance, but he was so hot it lasted only a
couple of minutes. I assured myself that his cock was still
pressed hard and moist against the carpet when I spread
his legs and roped his feet to rings set on either side of
the compartment.
When his ass was glowing with a satisfying warmth, I
left off long enough to work my way around him, then sat
on the floor at his head. I slipped my legs under his
shoulders, lifting his chest until I was able to reach under

97
and pinch his nipples. I removed his gag, and let him suck
a bit while I returned to my tit work. The warmth, the con-
fined space, and his bobbing head almost made me cum,
but I managed to hold off and finally resumed my former
position, warming his ass again before slipping inside for
a glorious ride. He was such a hot man, he tried to thrash
around while he was getting fucked, and I had to wrap
my arms tightly around his chest in order not to be bucked
off that tight little ass.
Later, when I untied his feet, he slipped out the door,
his hands still roped behind him. Naked, he knelt on the
ground within the semienclosure of the doors. "I could
use a little more beer... sir," he whispered.
"Do you want it warm or cold?" I asked him.
He hesitated a minute, maybe not completely sure of
my meaning. "Well," he said slowly, "I guess I'd like it
cold for drinking; then, if you'd untie my hands so I could
play with myself, I might try it hot."
I held the can to his lips, still not quite sure this was
really happening, and wishing there were some way to
postpone the impending conclusion. When he'd drained
the contents, I tossed the can aside and stood over him.
His hands were still tied as I sprinkled the first drops of
piss across his chest. He groaned, but said nothing as
I gave him a little more, this time on the chin. He flicked
out with his tongue and looked up at me.
"You still want your hands loose?" I asked.
"Ah, later, I guess," he whispered, and I gave him the
rest, part of which he took in his open mouth, but allowed
to slosh over his chin without swallowing it. He was ob-
viously abeginner at this particular phase, so I didn't put
any further demands on him.
When I'd finished, he remained on his knees as I leaned
over him to slip the knot off his wrists. Immediately, his
hands surrounded my dick and he kissed it before climb-
ing stiffly to his feet. He began playing with his own glori-
ous cock, which was obviously just on the verge of ex-
plosion; and at this point I have to admit I forgot about
roles and simply indulged myself.
98
 When he finally pulled on his clothes, he stood with me
for a while, as reluctant to leave as I was to have him go.
It was now about 2:00 AM, "Well," he said finally, "I
guess I'd better drive on in to Blythe and see if I can still
get a room."
"I'm going the same way," I told him.
He grinned, inclining his head toward the lights in the
valley below us. "You want to?" he asked. "The place
I usually stay will probably still have room."
"I'll follow you in," I told him. Watching him saunter
back to his truck, I knew my cowboy fetish was forever
strengthened and reinforced.

99
Chapter Five— Masters and Slaves
The Master-slave relationship is the ideal, the reality around
which all other SM play is imitation. Yet very few men ever
truly experience the reality in either role, and not many peo-
ple of any sexual persuasion ever understand it to any great
degree. There is a depth of commitment on both sides so
uncompromising, it is impossible for an outsider to empathize.
I would say that easily 99 of the "slave wants Master" ads
in the personal columns should more properly read "M wants
Top," because it is a rare individual who can accept the full
and total bondage— physical, emotional, social, professional,
financial, devotional.
SM, in our context, relates to historical slavery only in the
sense that the condition of slavery is a fantasy for many guys.
Like any other fantasy, the imagination tends to blunt the un-
pleasant or undesired aspects, while emphasizing those that
appeal to the dreamer— in this case, sexual factors. Out of
the very large population of M's, there are a few who are also
slaves, or would-be slaves, or potential slaves. Since I am
going use these three categories in the following discussion,
let me define them.

100
 Slaves are men currently in voluntary, total bondage to a
specific Master; or have been in this condition, through no
fault of their own have been removed from their active slave
status, and wish above all else to return to it.
Would-be slaves are aware of their psychological inclina-
tions, but have not yet experienced the actual conditions,
hence have never qualified as slaves, and may or may not
be capable of sustaining the conditions. But until they are
permitted their opportunity to try it, they are attemptinq to find
Masters to accept and train them.
Potential slaves are those who have the psychological dis-
position tobecome slaves, but have yet to recognize this com-
ponent within their basic personalities.
Being a slave has nothing whatever to do with race, na-
tionality, religion, age, gender, or socioeconomic status. Un-
like the ordinary masochist, the slave is not seeking a tempo-
rary dominance-submission situation; he wants considerably
more than a one-night stand, or even a prolonged sexual rela-
tionship—even one with an exchange of love and affection.
All of this may be part of the master-slave situation, and prob-
ably should be. But the submission of the slave is far more
complete. Whereas an M leads his own life and determines
his own destiny outside the actual area of physical interac-
tion, the slave does not. Every decision in the slave's life,
every facet of his existence, is controlled by his Master. If
he is permitted (or required) to work at a job outside the
Master's direct control, he does so only at the master's bid-
ding and under the conditions specified by the Master. Body
and soul, he belongs to the man to whom he has bound
himself.
If such a condition is incomprehensible to you, don't be
disturbed by your lack of empathy. It simply means that you
are one of a very large group of men who are not psycho-
logically set to be slaves. I do not say you are necessarily
one of a majority, because there are some who would tell you
that most humans are, indeed, cut out to be subser-
vient. .are
. potential slaves, within our earlier definition.
While not quite ready to accept this, I do take an agnostic
position: It may be true, but there is no way to prove or
101
disprove it. Certainly the world is filled with followers, while
leaders are fairly rare. How directly the condition of follower
relates to the status of slave is a philosophical question I leave
to you.
Needless to say, there are more slaves than Masters, hence
the number of men with unrequited, fantasized desires. And
because, as I have already noted, fantasy tends to dull the
unpleasant while emphasizing the positive perceptions, a
great many of these daydreamers would find themselves
emotionally incapable of actually living the life of a slave. I
might add here that I have also heard supposedly knowledge-
able people state: Not-all masochists are slaves, nor are all
slaves masochists. I have no quarrel with the first part of this
statement and have said as much; as to the second, let me
note that we are discussing all these relationships in a sex-
ual context, and are not concerned with the celibate,
psychological slave, or the symbolic slave, who may well en-
joy an asexual relationship with his Master. Nor are we con-
cerned with the "wage slave," or the devoted child chained
by guilt and love to his aged parents. Within our point of
reference, slavery certainly implies a heavy sexual bond, and
in this case any slave must be very much a masochist ; in fact,
he must be the epitome of a masochist. Whether the nonsex-
ual slave is a masochist or not is grist for another mill. There
have been many (far too many) lists compiled, purporting to
be "rules for the slave" or "the slave's code of conduct."
Generally, I do not like them very much, because there are
so many possible variations between one relationship and
another. It is impossible to state a single set of conditions
to apply equally well to each. Some have been done with a
tongue-in-cheek attitude, and when read outside our in-group
become perfect targets for ridicule. Still, I feel compelled to
provide one, since it will help clarify the depth of commitment
expected of a true slave. Let's call this a tentative credo for
the slave, remembering that each Master has the prerogative
to modify it:
1 . i am a slave, and as such i surrender myself completely
to my Master, and to his love for me.
2. Because my body is now my Master's property, it is no
102
longer my right to protest any use He chooses to make of
it. Rather, it is an honor if He deigns to touch me at all.
3. It is my duty to obey any and all commands given me
by my Master, and to do this without question.
4. i shall speak only when my Master gives me permission
to speak, and any question i have regarding His commands
or the specifications of my assigned duties are to be in private,
never in front of other people.
5. i acknowledge my inferiority to my Master.
6. In all personal activities, i surrender all decisions to my
Master:
a) i shall wear only the clothing my Master permits
me to wear, or go naked if He so requires.
b) my bodily functions are controlled completely by
my Master; even the times when i may go to the
bathroom are as specified by Him.
c) If i am to be permitted to work, i shall work only
for my Master, and surrender to Him all proceeds
from my labors.
d) i shall address my Master as "Sir" or "Master"
or by whatever title He chooses to specify.
e) i shall keep my body in the specified state of
cleanliness, outside or otherwise, according to my
Master's expressed desires.
f) i shall accept whatever punishments my Master
may decree without complaint or protest.
g) At all times, i will stand in a respectful posture in
my Master's presence, and will sit or lie down on-
ly with His consent. At no time will i presume to
sit on a piece of furniture without my Master's ex-
press permission.
h) my very thoughts will be only to love and serve
my Master and to make Him proud of me. i will
never carry feelings of anger or resentment
toward Him, and if such a thought should involun-
tarily cross my consciousness i shall immediately
confess these feelings to Him and submit to
whatever punishment He deems appropriate.
7. i recognize my duty to keep my body in a proper, healthy
103
condition for my Master's use and pleasure.
8. i will reside in whatever domicile is commanded and pro-
vided by my Master.
9. i will eat only those foods provided by my Master, when
and where He specifies that i may eat them.
10. i will never drink alcohol or take drugs without my Mas-
ter's specific permission.
1 1 . i will at all times be available for my Master's use, or
the use of whomever He shall command me to serve. At the
same time, i shall do my best never to be an encumbrance
upon Him, or to make Him uncomfortable by my presence.
12. i will submit willingly to whatever additional rules my
Master may wish to impose, either now, or at a later date.
There is, of course, a Master's counterpart to this credo,
and we'll get to that shortly. I have deliberately left out a num-
ber of specifics commonly found in such lists because the
individual Master should supply them, not someone outside
this very intimate one-on-one relationship. Nor have I neces-
sarily listed the ideas in their order of importance. The most
telling point, and one the slave can seldom not promise, since
he probably does it without understanding how or why, is:
The slave must subordinate his own ego so completely that
he actually becomes an emotional component of his Mas-
ter. Ifa man is unable to do this, he cannot function as a slave.
He can be an M, a subservient, a servant; but he is not a
slave.
How many of these Master-slave relationships actually exist
is difficult to estimate, since they are usually very carefully
concealed from anyone not closely acquainted with the men
involved. Perhaps for most people the word "slave" immedi-
ately conjures up images of chained and battered Africans
dragged from their homelands and transported to the New
World, to be beaten and abused and forced to labor beyond
the limits of endurance. Regardless how true or exaggerated
this historical stereotype may be, I can't imagine anyone in
his right mind seriously wanting to revert to this period. As
with many other historical evils, the fantasy will exclude the
reality and the horror. We focus only on the parts we find
stimulating, or titillating. The same barrier of time and/or
104
space makes it possible to look on other atrocities in a very
different light from the people who had to endure them: Nazi
Germany, Vietnam, Czarist Russia, Inquisitionist Spain,
Borgian Italy, various Latin American settings. Such are often
the basis for many of our best and most exciting stories.
So it is with many M's who visualize themselves as total
slaves, and jackoff to the fantasy. In an SM scene, they pre-
tend to be slaves, and the Top will often take up the challenge
and play the Master-rperhaps fulfilling a part of his own fan-
tasy. Because many Tops do think of themselves as Masters,
and do act out the part in the course of a scene, many peo-
ple writing about their encounters (myself included) will refer
to them as "Masters" in these particular contexts. Strictly
speaking, it is incorrect to do so, if we are to recognize the
same dichotomy between a true Master and a Top, or S, as
we do between an M and a slave, I feel, however, that the
line is more finely drawn in regard to Topmen, since many
very competent men perform the Top role so exclusively, or
so nearly exclusively, as to function almost as a Master. In
fact, they think of themselves as Masters. In a sense, there
is a dual standard, somewhat akin to the old het ideal of men
being free to have unlimited affairs with different women,
while the woman is expected to live a monogamous ex-
istence. Whereas a slave is generally not accorded that
ultimate lowly status unless he is pledged to serve a specific
Master, it is conceivable in our thought processes to accord
Master status to a man who tops many different men, but who
personally "owns no single slave." I don't know that this is
necessarily right or proper, but it seems to be reality. It only
goes to prove, I suppose, that we are conditioned by our
culture to an extent that we tend to transfer the norms of the
greater society into the nuances of our own subgroup. I would
like to hold forth on this theme for a moment, before trying
to explore the inner working of the Master.
In the United States, as in most western countries, we are
very concerned with the rights of the individual. Unfortunately,
one of the rights which is never mentioned— hence, in the
minds of many people is not a right at all— is the "right to
be a slave" And to those for whom the concept is nonempa-
105
thetic; i.e., to those who cannot, in their wildest flights of
imagination, conceive of ever entering into such a voluntary
state, an individual's need to be a slave is incomprehensi-
ble. A further difficulty that blocks a person's easy access
to this desired status is the lack of sexuality we find in many
of our political, religious, and corporate leaders. Men who
possess the ferocious power needs that drive them to achieve
these high leadership positions are often men who have
sublimated their sexual energies into other channels. They
may bang their wives or mistresses (or same-sex lovers) from
time to time, but they are generally not the type of men a very
sexual guy would call "hot" . . . possessing that elusive quality
that makes even a physically unattractive man a desirable
sex object.
Unfortunately, our written laws and much of the unwritten
code of social mores are determined by just this type of man
—and more recently woman. Adding support by their num-
bers are hordes of uptight, mostly middle-class people, who
for a variety of reasons are emotionally asexual. These are
the voters who put the politicians in office, the herds of con-
sumers who support the corporations, and flocks of parish-
ioners who support the religious zealots who tell them their
sexual abstinence is going to assure them a harp and a cloud.
Because of the complexity of our social structure, it is no
longer necessary for a person to function as a sexual being
in order to survive. Yet the innate lusts are still there, ex-
pended and/or rechanneled only in those who have either
achieved mightily within our socioeconomic world, or who
have found a legitimately sexual outlet for the energies that
are properly sexual. In the rest of humanity, these unrequited
sexual needs can become bitter pills of envy . . . envy of
anyone who seems to be enjoying a sexual existence.
But envy is unacceptable, so it becomes guilt, but people
can't live with that, either, so it eventually becomes "moral-
ity". . not the person's own morality, because he hasn't done
anything "wrong" (only had a few fantasies he's never had
the courage or opportunity to act out); the concern becomes
the "morality" of anybody who does act out the fantasies—
you and me ... or any other overtly sexual person1 Not only
106
do these highly sexual people pose a threat to the asexual
herd, but their behavior threatens to undermine the "moral
pillars" on which their leaders have established their right
to lead. Bad enough that the heterosexual divorce rate is enor-
mous, that men and women live together in unmarried bliss,
that kids start fucking in grammar school. While these prob-
lems are somehow beyond their control, they can manifest
some degree of understanding for them. But the concept of
a man's wishing voluntarily to become a slave is so far beyond
their comprehension that the entire herd ("wad," as Treva-
nian would call them) turns en masse to revile the poor, na-
ked, willing slave (and his Master), pointing with the accus-
ing finger of righteous, outraged morality, to say: "That condi-
tion simply can not exist. It is impossible for a human being
willingly to be a slave. He has to have been put upon, brain-
washed, coerced, or somehow forced to assume this status."
Even within our own community, there are many who can-
not understand this need, because they have never shared
the fantasy, and have never bothered to explore it with a per-
son who has.
Yet the condition does exist in a great many men, and,
harking back to my opening postulation of three general
classes of slave, I further speculate that we have a handful
pf men who are actually slaves— men who have found the
right Master and circumstances to live this lifestyle. To the
outsider his status may often appear to connote failure to
achieve on his own, hence his retreat from the world, etc.
Nothing could be further from the truth, except that the slave's
own basic masochism may cause him to reinforce the percep-
tion as an additional element of humiliation. But it is wrong
to think he has accepted this status because he has been
unable to function successfully in society, or even that the
structure of society has failed him. The true slave enters into
this condition because it is the only possible resolution of his
needs. Finding and accepting a Master is the ultimate suc-
cess. Ifthe relationship is right, there will be a bond of love
and dedication between the two that will exceed the outsider's
ability to perceive or understand.
Love within such a situation is a nebulous and highly indi-
107
vidual condition. The Master's love may be expressed with
a kiss, or with a whip; a compliment or a seemingly harsh
rebuke. He understands what he is saying, and so does his
slave, however it may appear to the onlooker. The Master-
slave condition, like any SM relationship, is so personal that
only the participants fully understand. The commitment can-
not be anything less than total.
The Master. In my attempt to explain and clarify my con-
ception ofa slave, I have of necessity done a partial number
on his counterpart, his Master. Now I will try to order these
thoughts into a more consistent pattern.
The Master's role is (physically easier, since he can deter-
mine exactly what, where, and when any activity— sexual or
otherwise— is going to take place. But his responsibilities are
far heavier than those of the slave. He must be prepared to
assume all aspects of "care and training." And he must do
this without recourse to the tongue-in-cheek nonsense of
those who have attempted to exploit the fantasy by publishing
ridiculous collections of outlandish rules and regulations. For
the Master there are no rules except those agreed to by his
slave and himself. There are only a few basic parameters that
he can not ignore: he may not, for instance, kill his slave,
even if the slave should ask to be killed. He has assumed
the responsibility for his slave's well being, physical and emo-
tional. He is no longer dealing with an M, as such, and is no
longer bound by the generally accepted concept of limits. His
slave (if he is proper slave) is not going to tell him, for instance,
that his punishment is too heavy, or that the provided hous-
ing, diet, or clothing is inadequate. He must be able to see
and correct his errors before they destroy the relationship.
The Master has, in a sense, accepted the responsibility of
a father and a lover— he must not only provide for the finan-
cial and physical needs of the household, but also set the
atmosphere in which he and his slave are going to coexist.
In the very beginning, his motivation may have been lust and
physical attraction, but this must very quickly enlarge to en-
compas aserious emotional involvement. Whether he ever
says it in so many words or not, he must love his slave, and
the slave — even without verbal assurance — must be made
108
aware of this love. In discussing this with the few men I have
known whom I would consider true Masters, I have noticed
a great diversity in the way they are willing to express these
feelings, but a complete universality in their agreement that
the feelings must exist. As one of these men once said to
me "The old pledge of the marriage contract, before feminists
came along and had it changed, were completely applicable
to a Master-slave situation. The slave (bride) promised to love,
honor, and obey. The Master (groom) promised to love, honor,
and care for. That's exactly how a Master and slave are bound
to one another, and that's exactly what each has to do if they
are going to stay together."
Thus the Master's credo might read something like this:
1 . 1 am a Master, and I accept this slave into my loving care
and protection.
2. 1 will provide the physical and emotional necessities of
life for my slave, and he will know my love as I choose for
him to know it.
3. I will use my slave's body as I wish, such usage to be
limited only by my responsibility not to damage either his
physical or mental being.
4. 1 shall establish a clearly understood set of rules for my
slave and I shall enforce his obedience in a firm but reason-
able manner. These rules will be for his protection as well
as his discipline, and will— to the best of my ability— foresee
every eventuality and control even the most minute aspect
of his behavior.
5. Within the self-imposed limitations established above,
I undertake to train and discipline my slave in a manner calcu-
lated to guide him toward a perfection of obedient submis-
sion that I know he can never achieve. In doing so, it will be
my goal to reward his efforts by dispensing the punishment
he requires and deserves.
6. 1 shall endeavour to provide for my slave's necessities
of life, even in the event that I should die or otherwise be ren-
dered incapable of caring for him.

The Master's credo, like the slave's is admittedly idealistic

and simplistic. It is also considerably lower than the slave's,
109
which is as it should be. The Master's responsibilities are
fewer in number, but considerably larger in scope. He is
accepting a human life into his keeping. He must cherish and
nourish it, but what enormous pleasure both he and his slave
can derive from these responsibilities!
A number of people have asked me about the legal status
of a Master-slave relationship, some even proposing drafts
of legal contracts to be executed between the participants.
I have discussed these points with several attorney friends,
and we have concluded that the question of voluntary slav-
ery—while apotentially interesting point at law— has never
been adjudicated. In fact, the 14th Amendment has not (as
far as we have been able to ascertain) been tested in such
a manner as to require a higher court— certainly not the
Supreme Court— to make an interpretation, so we can only
assess the scope of the Constitution in the light of our own
logic and understanding.
Going a step lower in the hierarchy of law, we find a number
of statutes in most states, passed during the frenzy of eman-
cipation during and following the Civil War. Most of these
statutes, likewise, have not been tested in a case involving
voluntary servitude. And if they have been tested, the deci-
sions were made in the 19th or early 20th Centuries, in social
climates which may no longer prevail. In effect, we would be
starting in a fairly clear legal field.
I am going to skip any discussion of the slave status im-
plied bya man's entering into a marriage contract (where he
binds himself to support the wife and kids), or the wage-slave
status of a "corporation man." We are considering the situa-
tion of the sex slave, where the legal problems present dif-
ferent and more pointed areas of interest.
For openers, as long as the situation of Master-slave re-
mained constant and mutually agreeable, there would be no
need for a written agreement. The authorities would be un-
likely toknow or care, except insofar as the participants might
be in violation of local laws regulating morality and sexual
practices. In the case of a written contract, the condition of
voluntary servitude would be carefully spelled out, but would
actually be meaningless. Such a contract would be more bind-
110
ing on the Master than on the slave, because the moment
the slave found himself unwilling to fulfill the conditions of
the contract, the Master would be compelled by the Constitu-
tion to emancipate him, or find himself in violation of the law.
On the other hand, if the Master wished to terminate the con-
tract while the slave did not, the Master might well find himself
still obliged to care for the slave— at least to provide food and
housing and minimal clothing. Legalities aside, of course, the
Master's threat of emancipation might be the ultimate weapon
to enforce his wishes.
There are, of course, certain rights you cannot waive. If
you hire a man to kill you, and he does exactly as you direct,
this in no way protects him from prosecution. It is possible
that a higher court might hold a similar condition to exist in
the matter of slavery; in fact, I would expect this, simply be-
cause the judge would be afraid to rule otherwise when the
case implied an SM relationship.
All this brings to mind the time Penishead decided to be-
come a slave, because he saw it as an easy trip— never hav-
ing to work again, being taken care of for the rest of his life,
plus getting all the sex and drugs he could ever want. (He'd
picked a rich doper as Master.) Unfortunately, the first time
the guy told him to do the laundry it shattered the aura of
pampered pet, and Penishead departed. It does take a modi-
cum of intelligence on either side to pull it off. Let me try to
give you a little fantasy trip— if nothing else, a chance to let
your emotions respond to a little verbal stimulation, while your
intellect prepares itself for our further explorations into the
world of sexual interaction.
Red had been a familiar figure in the bars and gener-
ally within the SM community for several years. There was
no denying his physical attractiveness, which had led me
to take him into my home and blackroom for a series of
long, very hot sessions during the early days of our ac-
quaintance, but, apart from a few conversations while at-
tending runs or other private gatherings, 1 was never very
close to him otherwise. He was an M in every respect,
however, even to his seeming inability to make the impor-
tant choices in his life without coming to another person
111
for advice and guidance. At first I chalked this up to his
being basically a flake, since he never seemed to succeed
in holding a job or making any real progress financially
or socially. For this reason, I only became close to him
after the catastrophe, when he came to me for help and
when he described the many facets of his ill-fated relation-
ship. Based on his statements, plus my own occasional
observations, I have pieced his story together as best I
could.
When Red first started coming to the leatherbars he was
actually only nineteen, but had phony I.D. to show he was
twenty-one. He was a tyarine, stationed at Camp Pendle-
ton, who came into Los Angeles every weekend he was
able to get away. At this early stage in his life he was fresh
faced, with strawberry blond hair, cut to a short, regula-
tion length. He had a milky white complexion that turned
red, rather than tanning, when exposed to the sun. In a
whipping scene, every stroke showed clearly against the
velvet smoothness one finds only on a truly youthful skin.
And did he love to get whipped! I wondered how he ex-
plained the marks when he returned to the barracks, but
this consideration never seemed to deter him. He loved
the scourge, and he loved to get fucked. And he was al-
ways hot to go, a fact which almost proved disastrous
for him several times when he picked the wrong partner.
At the end of his original three-year hitch he decided
against re-enlistment, because, although completely
happy in the tight structure and discipline of the Corps,
he really did not want the responsibilities of promotion,
and, as a secondary consideration, he was almost cer-
tain to be shipped out of Southern California, where he
wished to remain. Thus, barely twenty-one, he found
himself free of all restrictions, young, attractive, and
already well connected within the leather/SM communi-
ty. He had few material desires, and the series of un-
skilled, dead-end jobs he held for the next couple of years
were sufficient for his needs. Although he dabbled with
dope, he never fell into the trap of the heavy or even
regular user. He worked out regularly at a gym, maintain-
112
ing his tight little body in top condition. His one secret
craving, as I discovered much later, was to be forcibly
kidnapped and mastered. This had been a JO fantasy for
years, and as time went on it became almost an
obsession— something he wanted desperately, but did
not know how to obtain.
Convinced, finally, that it was never going to happen
by chance, he set out to arrange it. He ran a couple of
ads, giving Ms phone number rather than an address, stat-
ing his general physical attributes and his wish to be kid-
napped. His phone rang constantly, but most of the call-
ers were such obvious duds, he never bothered to follow
up on them. The first few he tried were unprepared to
carry out a genuine bondage situation, or to enforce their
demands. Red eventually had a couple of fairly good
scenes out of it, but they all fell short of the mastery he
really wanted. Nor were any of his contacts imaginative
enough to pull off the kidnapping. One of the gays he met
through the ads, however, provided the answer. He re-
ferred Red to a friend, another bottom, who had served
a master for several years. They had remained on friendly
terms after the breakup, and this former slave paved the
way for the initial meeting. Because he had, of course,
intimate knowledge of the Master in question, he was able
to reassure Red on the score of the Top's mental and
physical attributes, or I doubt he would have gone
through with the arrangements. The Master, on the other
hand, was equally assured regarding his potential slave's
qualities of mind and body. Red was instructed, via the
intermediary, to "sit back and wait." He would be con-
tacted and given instructions.
A neatly hand-printed card arrived in the mail a few days
later. It read:
You will report promptly at 9:00 PM, next Friday to
the comer of Melrose Avenue and Martel Street. In
the vicinity of that corner you will find a blue van,
license , parked at the curb. The
side door will be unlocked, you are to get in and lock
the door behind you. You will find a hood and pair
113
 of handcuffs on the floor. You will strip completely,
put on the hood, being sure not to dislodge the blind-
fold portions. You will then lie on the floor, on your
stomach, at which time you will lock the handcuffs
onto your wrists, securing them behind your back.
If you obey, you will be rewarded; if you fail, you will
not be contacted again.
Red had two days to make up his mind. The prospect
was exciting, but the potential danger was there as well.
The fact that the former slave had assured him was not
enough to quiet his fears, but in the end this was the fac-
tor persuading him to take the chance. A few minutes be-
fore the appointed hour, he drove his own car to the area
and parked it in an unlimited time zone. He found the van
a few spaces from the corner, on Martel, the side street.
The vehicles all around the area were obviously deserted.
The van was draped on all the windows, as well as across
the space behind the front seats. He glanced around to
see if anyone was watching, but there was no one on the
street, nor any lurking figure hiding in the shadows
around the small, neatly maintained houses. On exactly
the stroke of nine, he opened the side door and entered
the van.
Once inside, he locked the door and sat down on the
carpeted floor. It was just light enough to see the outline
of the hood and glint of steel from the handcuffs. Slowly,
he removed his clothes and took time to fold them and
stack them neatly on the floor beside the rear doors. Na-
ked and trembling from excitement and fear, he slipped
the hood over his head, adjusted the gag in his mouth,
and tied the thongs to secure it behind his head. As he
lay down on the floor, he reached under him to adjust his
cock and balls, unhappy to discover they had shriveled
up despite the swell of excited anticipation he now felt
through the rest of his body. He stretched his cock a cou-
ple of times, but it failed to respond. In total blackness
now, he felt for the cuffs, brought them behind his back
and fastened one about his left wrist. So far, he had
obeyed his instructions completely, but setting the sec-
114
ond cuff would be total commitment. It took him several
minutes to gather the courage, but in the end he did. As
the ratchets clicked about his right wrist, he experienced
the sense of total surrender, and finally felt a stirring of
response in his cock.
He lay alone in the darkness for a long time. He toyed
with the idea of wrestling the door open and stumbling
out into the street, but the certainty of all that would follow
was worse than his fear of the unknown, and he remained
where he was. Finally, he heard the front door open, and
felt the weight of a man climbing into the driver's seat.
The engine started, and the van moved away from the
curb. Red could feel the vehicle moving through traffic,
stopping many times before the wheels hit the concrete
pavement of a freeway. There had been so many turns
along the way, he had no idea what direction they were
headed. The vibration of speed and the rush of wind past
the metal sides were the only contact he had with the
world beyond his narrow confines. He could not even
know if the driver had bothered to part the curtains at
some point to check he was there, and the thought
crossed his mind that he could have been tricked into
entering a vehicle belonging to someone who had no
knowledge of the arrangements, and who would eventual-
ly discover his unwanted passenger only at some distant
point in time and space.
Finally, the van slowed, turned, and began to bounce
over an uneven dirt road, and Red's excitement built as
this seemed to indicate their arrival at some final destina-
tion. When the vehicle came to a stop, he lay still, almost
holding his breath, trying to hear his unseen mentor. His
mouth was very dry by now, almost glued to the leather
gag. His arms were aching, and his left hand was numb
from the pressure of the cuffs. He felt the motion as the
driver got out, closing the door firmly behind him. The
thrill of expectation rushed through Red's loins. He was
a total prisoner, bound and blinded by the leather hood,
brought to some unknown location and in the power of
a man he knows only on the basis of a somewhat sketchy
115
description. It was as total a commitment as he had ever
made.
The door slid open. A warm rush of air passed across
his skin as a pair of powerful hands grasped his upper
arms and pulled him toward the opening. For a moment
his upper body was suspended over emptiness, as his
captor held him halfway out the door. Then a firm, deep
voice ordered him to place his feet onto the ground.
He stood on a rough sandy surface, cool to the soles
of his feet. He swayed momentarily as his body oriented
itself to the upright position, held still in the grip of his
unseen mentor. The man led him a few yards across the
uneven surface, still Holding his arms— apparently walk-
ing backward in front of Red, pulling him forward. They
stopped, and the man removed the lower portion of the
captive's hood, exposing his mouth and nose, but leav-
ing the eyes and ears covered. Red heard the snap as a
tab was pulled on an aluminum can, and a second later
the rim was pressed to his lips. He drank greedily, drain-
ing the entire can of beer, slopping some down the front
of his body before it was taken away. He was standing
alone, then, and unaided, aware of an unusual warmth
to the air. From this he assumed they had driven into the
desert. There were no discernible sounds, although he
thought he detected traffic noises far in the distance, and
an occasional scuffing as his captor moved around him.
A pair of hands began moving over his body, exploring
every plane and surface of his being, testing the moisture
under his arms, the firmness of his buttocks, finally the
suspended softness of his genitals. He could feel himself
responding, but knew he must be disappointingly soft.
Gradually, the hand tightened its grip, pressing down
on his flesh until it hurt him, the pain reflecting into the
sides of his belly and making him groan in pain, starting
to double over. The hand released him, and without warn-
ing he was suddenly encircled by the man's arms, naked
flesh against his own chest, leather covered legs pressed
against his own nakedness, held tightly— so tightly he
could barely breathe, until the man's lips touched his. A
116
heavy odor of tobacco assailed his sense, and the tongue
parted his teeth, possessing him, warming him, and
somehow telling him he was safe in this disoriented
captivity.
The man talked to him, then, emphasizing Red's com-
plete inability to direct his destiny, referring to his total
captivity, to his helplessness. He moved Red a few steps
forward, used a leather thong to secure his cock and balls
and tied this off to a weathered wooden upright. He kept
talking, always in a soft modulated tone, going into a de-
scription ofhow he enjoyed using his slaves, hinting at
the pleasure he would take from his captive's pain and
attempts to escape it. The pressure of the rawhide around
Red's balls become tighter as the ex-Marine responded
to the expected punishment, and his cock filled out within
its enclosure. Finally, the tip of his dick touched the
wooden surface, making him draw back at the unexpected
contact. His Master laughed and struck him solidly across
the ass with a wide leather belt.
The session lasted for several hours, with Red taking
as hard a whipping as he had ever endured, then being
forced to kneel on the gritty surface while his captor in-
structed him in the fine points of sucking his particular
way. Each time the slave failed to perform exactly as he
was instructed, the tip of a riding crop snapped across
his back, reminding him to pay attention, to do exactly
as he was told. At one point he was commanded to sit
on a wooden surface, impaled as he lowered his weight
onto a large latex plug that filled his ass and held him in
place by force of its wide flange. With his hands still
cuffed behind him—reset now to alleviate his previous
numbness—and his body anchored by the plug up his
ass, Red was pierced through either nipple, and finally
through the frenum, the skin just below and behind his
cockhead. His Master said very little through all this, just
gave him frequent hits of amyl and set his needles
through the defenseless flesh. His only remark regarded
Red's lack of a foreskin, forcing the more painful but less
satisfactory piercing on his cock. Finally, the needles set
117
In the three points were connected by a cord and gradu-
ally tightened, forcing Red's body to hunch over. The in-
tense pain subsided, leaving only an afterglow of lesser
sensation, punctuated with a sharp stab of agony if he
tried to straighten up or shift position.
He was suddenly alone, aware of his Master's presence
only by the faint odor of smoke as the man must have
stood back and admired his handiwork. Red was still
hooded, still cuffed, naked and secured to the board by
a butt plug wedged tightly in the asshole. His cock and
his nipples were sewn together, and he was in some
unknown place, completely at the mercy of a man he had
never seen. A gust of warm air passed over his body, and
he shivered; but the warmth swelled higher in his groin.
For the first time in years, possibly for the first time in
his life, he felt a sense of total satisfaction. He had been
thoroughly mastered, and he had been kidnapped. His
body ached from the strain of his position and from the
welts left by the man's belt across his back and ass.
"Are you happy?" asked his captor.
It had been a completely unexpected and almost in-
congruous question; it took Red a moment to gather his
thoughts and respond. "Yes," he finally managed. "Yes,
Sir, I really am happy," he repeated, realizing how true
this was, how completely and uniquely true.
"I've decided that you please me," said the disem-
bodied voice, "and I'm going to keep you."
Red was momentarily dumbfounded, not completely
sure of his Master's meaning. It had not been a question,
however, and he realized that his answer to the first query
had in effect been the reason for his not having to respond
to this one. He said nothing, merely let his head hang for-
ward, wondering exactly what his captor intended.
"I take it you have no particularly pressing business,"
continued his Master. "Your job is inconsequential, and
there is nothing in your apartment you are going to need.
I will see that it is stored for you."
Red tried to sit up, restrained by the fierce pain in his
nipples and on the underside of his cock. But the pain
118
was unaccountably warm, and his dick was as hard and
full as it had ever been is his life. "Yes, Sir/' he
whispered, and with those words he bound himself to his
new life — sight unseen. He knew only vaguely what his
new Master looked like, and had no idea of where he lived,
or the conditions to prevail in his captivity. ..or slavery.
Yet he somehow felt secure with this man, respected him,
and sensed a degree of satisfaction in having pleased
him.
Within a month, he loved him. Don, his new Master, was
a man in his early forties, tall and well built, although cer-
tainly not pretty. His features were large and rugged, his
skin wrinkled from long hours in the sun. He was a
wealthy man, with acres of desert property under cultiva-
tion and various financial holdings in other areas of the
state. He had an apartment in the city, but his real home
was in the forested area above Mojave. It was here that
Red took up residence, and served his Master. Because
Don was away from the house almost every day, and due
to the somewhat conservative attitude of their closest
neighbors, Red wore work shirt and Levi's during the
daylight hours, as he performed his chores around the
house. At night, however, when his Master was home,
he remained in bondage, naked except for his harness
or shackles, and he did his best to please the man he had
accepted before ever even seeing him. Never in his life
had he been so completely satisfied and at peace with
himself. The forest, with its semkJesert brush and twisted
California oaks, mingled with pine and stands of
transplanted aspens, contributed to his idyllic sense of
euphoria. Mostly, it was Don's calm, firm mastery that
made everything combine to produce Red's response. He
had become a slave, and he had found the status exactly
suited to his needs.
Don had generated a number of "discreet inquiries"
before sending his note of instructions. He had been
aware of Red's background and he knew the younger man
was— to all outward appearances— exactly the type of
slave material he wanted. Thus the relationship had the
119
necessary components to nurture it from the start. It had
not come about completely by accident.
I saw Red once during this period, when he came into
The One Way with his Master. They made no great
display, although Red was wearing a narrow band of
studded leather across his throat, and he stood respect-
fully behind and to Don's left side. When I spoke to him,
he answered politely, and introduced me to Don, whom
I had seen a few times before, but only now connected
with the bits and pieces of the story which had come to
my attention. We talked for half an hour or so, during
which time Red brought us a couple of drinks, but other-
wise stood silent and respectful.
"I hope everything keeps going as well as it has for you
guys," I told them in parting, and Don asked me to think
about spending a weekend with them when I had the time.
I took the phone number of their mountain home, and left,
unaware that I was seeing Don for the last time. I
remember being very pleased that Red finally seemed to
have found the relationship he had been seeking.
Although I thought several times to call and take them
up on the invitation to spend a weekend, I just never got
around to it. But I did think about them from time to time,
and almost envied them their seemingly uncomplicated
relationship. About four months after our encounter in
the bar, I received a phone call late one evening from Red.
He asked if he could come up and talk to me. From the
tone and pitch of his voice, I knew something was wrong,
but he obviously did not want to discuss it on the
telephone. I told him to come ahead; and this is basically
the story he told:
"Last Saturday night, Don came home late in the after-
noon, and we had an early dinner. He liked to do that on
weekends, so that I would have time to get in shape for
whatever he wanted to do with me. I knew he'd planned
to have someone else come up, because the guard sta-
tion on the private road had called just before he came
home to verify his Instructions to let the guy in. I never
knew if he was inviting another Master to help work me
120
over, or if he had another slave coming up. Usually, if the
guy wasn't invited for dinner, it was a bottom so I was
kind of looking forward to it. I always like to have a sec-
ond slave, because Don enjoyed it even more than work-
ing with another Top. Of course, he never told me ahead
of time. I was just expected to take things as they came,
and that was fine with me. I was never disappointed, no
matter what he did.
"So I got dinner ready, at least had everything under
way when he arrived, and we had a couple of drinks to-
gether. He never put me into bondage until later, because
he said it looked ridiculous to have me clanking around
the kitchen, having to call him because I couldn't reach
the shelves to get things down, or put something away.
I was naked, though, and I was wearing his harness
around my cock and balls, just to remind me who I be-
longed to. Anyway, after dinner he told me to get myself
cleaned up. That meant I was supposed to shower and
douche real good, and to report to him when I was ready.
I was really hot to go by the time I finished, and wondered
who was going to show up. The house was good sized,
as I guess you know, but it didn't have a basement. Don
had converted one of the back bedrooms into a dungeon,
so that was where we usually got it on.
"He took me back there, and he acted a little mysteri-
ous. He was up to something, I knew, and whoever he
had coming up was involved in it. I couldn't figure it out
at the time, but I discovered later that he had planned to
ring me. It was something he'd never done to anyone be-
fore—a permanent gold ring, a Prince Albert piercing, and
he had a friend coming to help him. It was sort of his way
to put his mark on me, and I guess to do it as a symbol
of love and possession. But like I said, I didn't know that
when he first took me back to the dungeon room, only
that something was up because of the way he handled
me. He was a very warm guy, really, anyway; but tonight
he was especially affectionate, kissing me several times
and running his hands over me a lot more than usual when
he fastened leather bands onto my wrists and ankles.
121
Usually, he used metal restraints. I knew he really pre-
ferred them, and he usually fastened me down to a rack
or against one of the verticals— the cross or the post. In-
stead, he put the restraints on me, but I wasn't attached
to anything.
"When the doorbell rang, he told me to go answer it,
and to bring his guest back there to him. So I headed for
the front door, naked except for my leather cuffs and
ankle bands, the harness on my cock and balls, the col-
lar around my neck. It was pitch black outside, of course,
and there wasn't much light in the front hall or on the
porch. Answering ttie door in this condition shouldn't
have made any difference, and there was no reason to
expect anyone, other than the guy he'd invited, to be
there.
"So I opened the door, expecting to do my proper
slave's 'welcome to my Master's house' number, and sud-
denly I'm staring at two big bruisers in prison blues. One
of them's holding a piece of water pipe, and the other
one's pointing a butcher knife at me. For about ten
seconds, no one moved.
I guess they were as surprised to see me as I was to
see them. I knew right away what their story was, because
there was the old women's prison in the valley that they
converted into a men's minimum security facility. They
were always having escaped inmates, and the whole area
was up in arms about it. Both guys were in their twen-
ties, one of them a dirty blond with a broken tooth in the
front of his mouth, the other a kind of swarthy Mexican
with a little thin mustache and a Fu Manchu goatee. Finally
the blond guy poked his piece of pipe into my gut, and
shoved me back. They both crowded in and pulled the
door shut.
" 'Looks like we got us a slave boy, Ramon,' he said.
'What's your story, kid? You got a Master or a Mistress
back there?'
"I was still speechless. It was like the floor had dropped
out from under me, and when my mind started to unfreeze
the first thing I could think of was trying to alert Don. But
122
Ramon moved up to me fast and stuck the point of his
knife under my chin. 'You keep your fuckin' mouth shut/
he whispered.
" Who else is in the house?' asked the blond.
" 'My ... my friend's back there,' I said, nodding toward
the rear of the house.
"The blond— Bruce was his name— got behind me and
took the thin slave collar off my neck. Using this, he at-
tached my wrist bands together. 'Nice of them to provide
the cuffs,' he sneered. 'Now let's head back to your Mas-
ter,' he added, shoving me in the center of my back.
"So I stumbled back into the dungeon room, the two
assholes right behind me. Don was standing across the
rack from us as we came in, and I could see the smile
of greeting fade as he saw the two escaped inmates be-
hind me. 'I'm I'm sorry . . . ' was all I managed to stam-
mer before Ramon ran around the flat, leather covered
table, brandishing his knife. But Don wasn't a Master for
nothing. He grabbed a bunch of chains off the wall and
slammed the Mex across the head with them. Ramon went
down, and his knife skittered across the surface of the
rack. Unfortunately, it landed at my feet, and Bruce was
quick enough to grab it and held it against my throat.
'Okay, big man,' he said. 'Just back off or I'll gut your
kid, here.'
"Don dropped the chain, and sagged back against the
wall. Ramon struggled up off the floor, blood running
down the side of his face. He said something in Spanish;
the only word I recognized was 'puto,' but he slugged Don
in the belly with both hands, pushing him up against the
wall as my Master tried to catch his breath. Don started
to grapple with him again, but Bruce yelled that he'd kill
me, and Don stopped. Ramon spun him around so he was
facing the wall and pulled his hands together behind his
back. He used another set of leather restraints on Don's
wrists, fastening them together with a padlock, then used
a double-headed clip to secure a ceiling chain around his
neck. 'That oughta hold puto grande,' he said.
" 'Yeah,' Bruce agreed, 'and little puto, here, ain't gon-
123
na give us any trouble neither.'
"There was an evil grin on Ramon's lips as he looked
back at us. 'No, but maybe he can give us something
else,' he said slyly. 'I bet he's used to takin' it up the ass,
and I ain't had no pussy in a couple'a years.'
" Keep your fuckin' hands off him!' Don shouted.
"Ramon spun around and landed another blow to the
gut, and Bruce laughed. 'It ain't our hands you gotta worry
about, faggot,' he snarled. He grabbed at the crotch of
his pants with one hand, and shoved me down on the rack
with the other, bending me over the end of it. Then he
untied my hands and, taking hold of my wrists he shoved
my arms across the surface, where Ramon quickly
snapped them to the sides, using the "C" clamps that
were already in place. My feet were still on the floor, but
my upper body was stretched across the leather-covered
table. I could see Don still fighting to get his breathing
back to normal, glaring at the pair of intruders. But they
were ignoring him, now, concentrating their attention on
me. Bruce already had his pants off, and was working his
cock up to a full erection. It was a big one, circumcised,
with a bulbous head that gleamed in the dull backroom
lights as he dipped his hand into an open jar of lube, and
worked the grease down the length of his shaft.
"Ramon was looking at the collection of toys hanging
on the walls, and my heart sank as I saw him pick out the
biggest, heaviest cat. Don had never used it on me, and
had once joked that it was the ultimate punishment—one
I'd only feel when he was sure I'd grown into it.
" 'Let me warm it up for you first,' said Ramon, mov-
ing around to my end of the rack.
"Bruce stood back, still stroking his dick, and Ramon
ran his fingers along the knotted leather strands. 'Don't
take too long,' Bruce said. 'That ass looks nice and tight.'
" It's gonna be nice and hot too,' Ramon assured him.
He drew back his arm and let me have the cat at full force,
all across my ass and lower back. I screamed in pain, and
twisted my lower body. He let me have it again, this time
over my upper back and shoulders, one strand hitting me
124
on the side of the neck. After that, he stayed mostly on
my ass, both of them making remarks about leather-
faggots liking to be whipped, and how my nice hot skin
was going to feel when they got into the saddle. Tears
were streaming down my face, and I could hardly see.
I must have been sweating heavily, too, because the salt
stung my eyes when I tried to look up at Don, still secured
against the wall to my left. I couldn't see the two con-
victs, except as blurry shapes in the mirror just in front
of me. The whipping must have been turning both of them
on, because I could see that Bruce had stripped com-
pletely, and Ramon seemed to be using his free hand to
work at his own crotch.
"Abruptly, the whipping stopped, and Bruce fell on top
of me. His cock pressed against my asshole, not quite
on center, sending a fresh wave of pain through my body.
I knew I had to be bleeding from the cat, and as his body
pressed against me the hairs further irritated the cuts and
welts. Finally, he found the mark and shoved into me,
started pumping and yelling like a bronco rider in a rodeo.
Ramon came up to the end of the rack, playing with his
long slim cock, sort of waddling because his pants were
down around his ankles. He stretched himself across the
rack, lying on his side, shoving his cock in my face. There
was a strong, raunchy odor as he grabbed the back of
my head and forced me down on his dick. 'Come on, fag-
got,' he muttered, 'come on, make it feel good.'
"His cock really tore at my mouth and throat, because
I was so dry I had no spit to ease his passage. That didn't
seem to bother him, and he ground my face into his groin
while Bruce continued to hammer away at my ass, sliding
his fat rod in and almost all the way out, before ramming
it all the way into me again.
"I guess it was a rape scene some guys might dream
about, and I could feel my own balls responding to the
physical demands, but I was so scared I couldn't think
about anything except how we might both come out of
this. Suddenly, in the middle of this double rape, like a
noise far in the distance, I heard the doorbell again. Bruce
125
stopped abruptly, and Ramon yanked his cock from my
lips.
" 'Who's that?' Bruce demanded.
" 'It's a friend of mine,' Don told him. 'You'd better let
him in, or he'll probably call the cops.'
"As Ramon rolled off the rack, I was able to see Don
for the first time in about fifteen or twenty minutes. He
had a peculiar expression on his face, flicking his eyes
at me, then at Bruce. I didn't know just what he was try-
ing to tell me, and it really didn't matter, because Bruce
grabbed me by a handful of hair, and forced me back onto
my feet as soon as Ramon unsnapped my wrists.
" 'You stay here with the big faggot,' said Bruce. 'I'll
take little puto here to answer the door. Toss me your
knife.'
"With the point of Ramon's butcher knife against my
back, but with my hands free, the big blond guided me
toward the front door. 'Just let him in as if everything's
normal . . . hah! Normal, shit, as if anything about you
queers is normal.' My back and ass hurt like hell, and I
was so stiff from the pain I could hardly stand even the
touch of his blade against me. I was also angry by now,
not feeling the fear like I had before, because I was so
pissed I just wanted to kill both these bastards and kick
their corpses into the cesspool. His running comments
made me all the madder, because he'd just put me
through a scene Don would never have done, and here
he was calling us 'queer.'
"The doorbell rang again just as we got there, and I
pulled the heavy oak portal open. A small, middle-aged
guy in Levi jacket and pants stood there, smiling at me.
'Hi,' he said, 'I'm Jenks.' He stepped in before he got a
good look at Bruce, who promptly slammed the door shut
and threatened the newcomer with his knife. He told
Jenks to 'shut up, and get moving,' and all three of us
headed back toward the dungeon.
"Jenks and I went though first, and I saw right away
that Don wasn't chained to the wall anymore. I didn't have
time to see more than that, because the moment Bruce
126
came through, Don was on him, making a grab for the
knife. I grabbed Jenks and pulled him out of the way as
the two big men struggled for a few seconds, and all of
a sudden Don let out this terrible, throaty gasp and fell
back against the rack. The knife was sticking out of his
belly, and Bruce just stood there in shock. I grabbed a
piece of two-by-four that Don used as part of a suspen-
sion device, and I hit the sonofabitch against the side of
his head so hard he never woke up. Jenks went to call
an ambulance while I tried to help Don. Ramon was
trussed up on the floor. I guess Don had unbuckled the
cuffs and gotten his hands free before the doorbell rang,
and that was what he had been trying to tell me.
"Anyway, he never made it to the hospital, and I didn't
even think about getting dressed before the cops and am-
bulance arrived. You can imagine the mess they made
out of the whole thing— held me in the jail hospital for
three days, before the D.A. decided there weren't any
charges they could hang on me. I just got out this morn-
ing, and I don't know what to do."
As it turned out, Don had taken care of Red in his will and
with an insurance policy, so the kid really had nothing to worry
about financially. But he honestly had been in love with Don,
and he never really got over it. He stayed with me, and with
some other friends for a while, then drifted back into the bar
scene. To all outward appearances he seemed okay, but he
was a slave without Master, and I doubt he is ever going to
find the proper partner again.

127
CHAPTER SIX— The Basic Specialties
A number of people have expressed to me, both in person
and in writing, their perception of an SM scene (or relation-
ship) as something dreadfully serious, devoid of humor, with
love taking a back seat to a complex of pain giving-receiving
lusts. Most of these commentators have, at best, only dabbled
on the fringes of leathersex.
I do not see lack of humor as a particularly valid considera-
tion. After all, most sexual interaction occurs in a relatively,
sober atmosphere, be it gay or otherwise. Jokes, giggling,
laughter, horseplay... .all these take place, if at all, before
or after the actual intercourse. If one partner gives vent to
these bubbling expressions of humor during an otherwise
successful fuck, it is going to be distracting, if not downright
insulting, to the other partner. I do not see how an SM ex-
change isany different. Plenty of humor is expressed in our
own literature, in cartoons, comic strips, etc. We tell jokes
on ourselves, and by and large have the same ability to laugh
at our own shortcomings as any other class of sexual
participants.
A much more pointed criticism had to do with the lack of

128
love in an SM scene— or more accurately, the lack of love as
perceived by the uninitiated. But, in our modern, hurried lives,
love takes a back seat to lust in a majority of the sexual inter-
actions among all people, of all sexual persuasions. That's
what makes it so wonderful when it does happen! Of course,
it is sometimes inconvenient, especially if it interrupts an
otherwise smoothly functioning life style. But that, again, is
just as apt to happen to a heterosexual or to a "normal" va-
nilla gay, as it is to us.
Thus, as I describe the basic specialties that most SM peo-
ple experience and enjoy, remember that love can be lurk-
ing around any corner, ready to jump out and grab you when
you least expect it. Now, having assured the romantic of the
possibility, if not the inevitability of love existing within an SM
interchange, let's take a look at some of the activities that
make it so much fun, that occupy those busy hands and acti-
vate the bound and writhing body. In this chapter I mean to
cover only the basics, the skills most Tops acquire early on
in their careers, that most M's expect and anticipate, and that
are generally done with materials you can find without a great
deal of searching.

Bondage. So basic is bondage to the art of SM that a cer-

tain amount of discussion was inevitable in the preceding
chapters. However, there are still a few points to be covered.
It is a rare SM scene that does not involve some form of re-
straint, soI consider the skill to be absolutely vital, something
every Top should know how to do, and do well. Enlarging
on my previous comments, I would point out that in one sense,
bondage is not a difficult or complicated concept, except that
so many guys do it poorly. There are two important and uni-
versal rules: 1 .) The restraints should be applied in such a
way that the M cannot get loose. 2.) The restraints and the
position in which they confine the subject should be comfort-
able enough not to distract from the rest of the action. Sim-
ple as it sounds, the number of so called Tops who fail in
either or both respects is discouraging. In order to accomplish
a really proper bondage, and to facilitate both conditions, it
is a good idea to apply the restraints symmetrically; i.e., the
129
same on the right as on the left. This keeps everything in bal-
ance, so to speak, and is more likely to ensure both "com-
fort" and an escape-proof binding. Now let's review the most
common materials and how best to apply them.
Rope is the most basic bondage material, used since the
dawn of history. A wide variety is available, and which type
is used rests solely on the discretion of the S. I would sug-
gest, as the cheapest and most practical, plain white cotton
clothesline. Plastic is too slippery and may not stay tied. Hemp
can irritate the skin and cause an allergic reaction. Nylon is
strong, but tends to ravel; it should either be back-braided
on the ends before use, or sealed with wax, which requires
the pieces to be in the appropriate lengths before the scene,
because you can't stop to cut it while doing your number on
the M. Clothesline is about the right diameter and malleabil-
ity. Anything much thinner can cut into the skin, causing pain,
a reduction of circulation; and possibly pinching of the nerves
(numbness). Rawhide tends to be a bit thin, often with sharp
edges, and may cut off circulation, but of course, there is
sometimes an undeniable fetish attraction to it, so use your
own judgement; just remember to check the M's hands from
time to time. A heavier rope than clothesline may be too thick,
making it more difficult to tie the guy securely.
If the clothesline you purchased has sizing (starch) in it,
you should soak and dry it out before use. The greater the
flexibility, the easier it is to handle. With a little practice, you
will know ahead of time how long the pieces should be, and
can have them ready. Pulling out a knife to cut the rope can
sometimes provoke an understandably adverse response
from your subject. As a general rule, I should say that 3 1/2
to 4 feet (about a meter) is adequate to secure a pair of wrists
or ankles. One good, basic tie is to make a slipknot in the
end of the piece; start with this around one wrist, just to an-
chor it.Wrap the rope around both wrists a couple of times,
then bring it around to make a loop between them, cinching
down the part already encircling the wrists. This forms a sort
of handcuff when you tie it off with a couple of "under and
overs."
Because you want to leave the ass free for future use, I
130
suggest the wrists not be bound with the hands extended
downward, but rather with the elbows bent to place the hands
in an opposed position, overlapping across the small of the
back. You can further ensure their remaining out of your way
by running the end of the rope up to the neck and tying it
off with the hands elevated well above the ass. I also sug-
gest placing them wrist-to-wrist, that is with the pulse side
of the wrists against each other, since this helps alleviate cir-
culatory problems or pinched nerves. Placing the hands in
this position should not raise them high enough to cause
much strain, and the area of the back you are covering is
the part you don't want to do anything with, anyway, since
it is just above the kidneys.
The ankles can be secured in much the same manner, and
instead of tying off to the neck, there is a useful and obvious
appendage hanging directly above them, just waiting for your
anchoring knots. You can probably think of many more ex-
otic forms of bondage than rope, but none is more practical,
and for many guys it is the most exciting restraint you can
use. For one thing, it tends not to be particularly uncom-
fortable. An M can be tossed onto his back with his hands
tied behind him, and he will not carry on as he would if he
had handcuffs biting into his spine. Even leather restraints
have metal fastenings, and these can cut or otherwise in-
convenience either or both parties, depending on the ensu-
ing action.
Leather restraints are available from any supplier, and
come in the usual "wide variety." Their greatest shortcoming
is that most of them simply buckle around the wrists, and un-
less you separate the hands, it is possible for the M to free
himself. For the same reason, even if the hands are spread
apart, they should probably be secured with padlocks rather
than double-headed clips. A lot of guys don't worry about this,
because they know their M's won't even try to get loose.
That's fine, but the psychological effect is lost if the bottom
knows he can free himself. In using any locking device, be
sure the key is readily available, in case of emergency. A large
jailer's keyring is a good device to have, with one each of
every key on it.
131
 Some leather restraints are simple loops of belt leather,
with long narrow slots cut in them, and a "V"-shaped hasp
on the other end. These are intended to be wrapped around
the wrist or ankle, the hasp pushed through the slot, then
secured with a clip or padlock. Again, I opt for the lock.
I cannot describe all the many variations, but I do recom-
mend the better leather restraints which are made with a flap
of leather under the buckle, or are lined with fleece, and
will (again) cut down the chances of circulatory problems. I
don't like the foam rubber linings, which wear out quickly and
respond adversely to the oil you should occasionally apply
to the leather to keep it in good shape.
Handcuffs are the most popular form of metal restraint.
They are also the most dangerous, because they can close
down on the wrist if not properly "set," and can do perma-
nent damage if left on too tightly for too long. There are many
kinds available, from the cheap ($10) Japanese or Taiwanese
models, to the expensive ($75-$150) police deluxe (usually
Smith & Wesson, or Peerless, or American Handcuff— for-
merly American Munitions). Some guys like the cheap ones,
because they have a simple slide catch to set them. It is faster
and easier than the better grade, which have to be set either
by inserting the key into the lock and turning it the wrong way,
or by a key which has a little nub on top that has to be in-
serted into a hole in the cuffs. In semidarkness, it is
sometimes more difficult to set these, but once it's done they
stay put. The cheapies can loosen up so that the catch slides
and allows the cuffs to tighten when you don't want them to.
I have never had a pair of cuffs, of any type, fail me; but
I am careful in storing them, and they are always well lubri-
cated (not always by design). I have heard all kinds of horror
stories; cuffs that tighten, then won't unlock; locks that refuse
to open and need to be cut off; locks that won't stay locked;
etc. As a general rule, I would say to buy a fairly good pair
of cuffs as soon as your pocketbook can stand it, if you in-
tend to use them with any frequency. I always have a metal
cutter and hack saw stashed in my blackroom, just in case,
although I have never had to use them.
I'll leave a discussion of the more exotic metal restraints
132
for later, and will go on now to examine a few of the other
more common forms of bondage. Our leather workers have
come up with an enormously wide range of ideas, and most
of them copy each other until you can get almost anything
from any one of them. A few remaining pieces I especially
like are listed below, but they do not by any means cover the
entire field:
Neck restraint: This is a leather collar, much like the "whip-
lash" harness (or cervical collar) people wear when they are
suing an insurance company after being rear-ended in their
cars. It holds the head in a brace position, and can serve as
a restraint as well as a slave collar. I have seen them with
studs, or just in black leather. With steel "D" rings set at stra-
tegic points, it permits the attachment of anchoring chains
or leather-cuffed hands.
Neck-wrist restraint: This is a wide leather collar that fastens
shut in the front, but has a second buckle in the back to at-
tach alength of belt leather. This second piece lies vertically
along the spinal column, hanging freely from the neck. A pair
of wrist restraints is attached to this, allowing the hands to
be strapped onto it, one above the other. Most models I have
seen lack one small, essential element: a lock on the buckles
of the wrist restraints. Without this, it is possible for one hand
to free the buckle holding the other. If the buckles had small
eyelets on the tongues that went through the holes in the
leather straps, they would be more secure. However, with
a small, muscular M, this device emphasizes the definition
of his arms and chest, providing a stimulating spectacle for
the Top, while somewhat restricting his access to the upper
back.
Wrist-thigh and wrist-ankle restraints. These, as the names
imply, are devices for securing the wrists to either the thigh
or ankle. They normally consist of a paired set, each having
a leather wrist band sewn and/or riveted back-to-back with
either the ankle band or the much wider, heavier thigh strap.
With the wrists thus attached to the thighs, the M is held in
a more or less "attention" posture, while the ankle restraints
are used for a scene in which the Top wants his subject to
be bent double, perhaps in a standing position, to elevate
133
the ass and leave it completely accessible. This latter posi-
tion can prove quite a strain on the M, but if it is possible
to secure him over a firmly anchored dowel or other horizon-
tal at waist level to take up some of the strain, the M can be
kept in his awkward, humiliating posture for much longer.
Wrist-waist restraints. The design of these pieces is the
same as the old standard used in mental institutions (fre-
quently called "psycho straps"): simply a pair of wrist
restraints attached to either side of a heavy leather waist belt.
In selecting one of these, be sure the wrist bands go under
the belt, and are not merely attached to the sides and stitch-
ed in place. It is almost impossible to anchor the wrist straps
securely enough to hold a determined escape artist, unless
the wrist straps are secured so that his pulling is against the
inside of the belt itself, rather than a few metal rivets or sewn
attachments. The advantage of this type of restraint is in hav-
ing the arms obstructing only the sides of the rib cage, leav-
ing the entire back and chest exposed, as well as the hips
and upper thighs (as opposed to a wrist-thigh restraint). It can
also evoke images of inmate bondage, since "psycho straps"
are (or were) frequently used to subdue unruly prisoners in
country jails.
Suspension harnesses. These larger, more expensive
pieces can be dangerous if not properly constructed. Select
a harness that won't break and drop the M several feet onto
the floor, or cause him to do some other injury to himself.
The harness, in any case, will have a waist belt, as well as
attachments going over the shoulders and between the legs,
to attach front and back to the belt. The shoulder straps will
normally cross in the back. Beyond these basics, the
harnesses will vary. Some are made only for vertical suspen-
sion, meaning that the M will be hanging by the shoulder
straps only, with his feet pointed toward the floor. (For a
cheaper variation of this type of suspension, you might try
a parachute harness, found in many "surplus" stores, or from
a firm catering to recreational sky divers. They are normally
made of nylon webbing.) For horizontal suspension, your
leather supplier will usually have a harness with metal rings
on either side of the waist.

134
 It is essential that the suspension harness fit snugly at all
points, so tightly in fact that it may seem excessive when first
putting it on. This is generally true for all leather restraints,
which tend to stretch a bit under pressure. In suspension,
the tight fit becomes critical, because the full weight of the
body is going to emphasize any looseness, with the result-
ant chafing or cutting that is guaranteed to distract the M.
For the same reason, you want to make sure not to twist any
of the straps in putting them on. It is also important for all
connections to be symmetrical; i.e., if a suspending chain is
attached eleven links from the top on one side, it must be
eleven links on the other.
For a horizontal suspension, it is necessary to secure the
ankles, usually at about the same height as the rest of the
body. If you err, it is better to do so by making the feet hang
higher, not lower, than the rest. This gives the M a greater
sense of soaring, and is a more natural position. It also en-
sures that the legs are taking their share of the weight. Once
he is suspended by the shoulder and waist (usually attached
to heavy chains— far more dependable than ropes), and the
legs are fastened in place, you have only the arms to worry
about. In some instances, the Top prefers to have these ex-
tended forward, placing the M in a horizontal, more or less
"high dive" posture. The hands can also be secured against
the small of the back. In most cases, the M is suspended belly
down, unless you are going for some particularly interesting
frontal action (such as hot wax). I do not advise the suspen-
sion harness for fistfucking, or other extensive anal play. The
straps passing through the crotch are going to get in your
way, and you may find the M unable to take the strain of sus-
pension long enough for an easy, unhurried action.
You can avoid ever having to lift the M if you attach his
shoulder straps first, while he is standing upright. You then
pull his legs back, one at a time, and secure them to chains
suspended several feet behind him. Remember that his
weight will tend to pull downward in the center of his body,
so it is better to space the chains for his ankles (and wrists,
if these are to be extended forward) so that they are at least
a few feet farther than his arms or legs can reach. This way,
135
his weight is in opposition to the suspending pieces at an
angle, rather than a straight vertical (unless you want him
to sag in the middle like a slaughtered animal being carried
back from a safari hunt).
With a very light body build, it is possible to suspend a guy
for a limited time by just his wrists and ankles (without using
a body harness). I do not recommend this with a husky man,
simply due to his body weight causing circulatory problems
where the restraints bind his wrists and ankles. The muscle
tone of the M will also be a determining factor, since an ath-
letic type will be able to take more abuse. A fatty should defi-
nitely go up in a body harness. Large eye screws, set (for
sure) into ceiling studs are essential to make sure the sub-
ject isn't going to come crashing down. Neither would I ever
attach the M by neck or genitals, no matter how confident
I was of the suspension. If something should go wrong, I don't
want him to hang himself or come tumbling down with his
balls still locked to an overhead chain. Padded wrist and ankle
restraints are recommended for suspension without a body
harness.
Once in suspension, there are a great many possible activ-
ities. But if your M is new to a suspension scene it is a good
idea just to let him hang for a few minutes, while you stroke
him, double-check his fastenings, or get materials ready for
the next stage. Again, don't rush him, and be sure not to say
or do anything to make him sense any lack of confidence on
your part that he is being held securely and safely. If you don't
have confidence in your mechanics, you shouldn't have put
him up in the first place.
So far we have been concerned with "free hanging" sus-
pension— probably the most exciting for the M, if not the most
common. He experiences a sensation of complete helpless-
ness, while at the same time he seems almost to be flying
... or soaring. But there are other ways of suspending him,
and I'd like just briefly to mention them. These usually involve
attaching the M to some kind of vertical object: the wall itself,
or a device such as a cross. This type of suspension is fre-
quently less satisfactory, since it limits access to one side
of the body. However, these various postures can be "fetish
136
fulfilling," especially if you use a cross. Again, in most of these
situations you can avoid having to lift the M if you attach his
waist first, having him stand as tall as he can while you do
it, then lift his legs one at a time, and secure them in a slightly
spread position to raise them off the floor. Although draw-
ings and cartoons often depict an M hanging by wrists and
ankles against a dungeon wall, this is not realistic. The use
of a waist belt is essential for any long-term situation.
Upside-down suspension involves hanging the M by his
ankles; or by use of lace-up boots permanently affixed to a
board or other small surface which, in turn, is secured to
chains or ropes. It can be quite exciting, and some guys have
very elaborate systems of pulleys to permit its being done
without a great deal of effort. But remember how unnatural
this position is, and be alert to potential problems. Often a
novice M will be game to try it, not knowing how the sudden
rush of blood into his brain is going to affect him. In any form
of upside-down situations, the Top should be prepared to get
the guy down quickly if there are problems. If the M is able
to take it, a free hanging upside-down suspension can make
for a fabulous whipping scene—but fairly short. I prefer not
to have a guy in this position for more than fifteen or twenty
minutes at a crack, although I know some guys who go for
much longer periods of time.
Crucifixion is a big scene for many M's, and quite natu-
rally reflects the Christian ethic, transposed into the
blackroom. For some, the religious aspects are negative, in
that the M may feel it is sacrilegious. (Sean, my long-time
illustrator, refuses to illustrate stories involving crucifixion for
this reason.) Be that as it may, the Romans were using the
procedure long before Christians came onto the scene, and
if we concentrate on the barbaric aspects of the ritual instead
of the religious, it makes it more exciting anyway. (I don't
know of any bottoms who fantasize on being Jesus Christ;
Saint Sebastian is far more popular.) Note, too, that the
Romans generally did not nail the victim to the cross, but tied
him in place, leaving him to die of exposure, thirst, and star-
vation. Neither did they ever hammer the nails through the
palms of the hands, which would not have held the body

137
weight. If they nailed, it was through the wrists. Thus, when
you tie a guy's wrists to a cross, you are doing it the Roman
way.
Although Christian churches generally depict the Latin
cross (or Cross of Calvary), the Romans also used the "X"
form (or Saint Andrew's). Either of these is appropriately used
in a blackroom, as well as a "T"-shaped structure, that is
a cross only via the imagination. The "X" is easier to con-
struct, and also tends to be more stable. While lacking the
familiar form, it serves its purpose better. The M can be bound
to it face in for a good flagellation scene, or face out for some
extensive tit work and/or cock and ball torture. It is also easy
to secure him around t{ie waist, if you want to have him
suspended, because the waist will fall at about the inter-
section ofthe two cross pieces.
Securing the waist is more difficult with the Latin cross;
the wide horizontal allows the arms to be attached at the
shoulders, wrists and elbows. Take care in fastening the arm
just below the shoulder; this is a major pressure point, and
you can cut off circulation. You can also use a waist strap,
if you drive a few very heavy nails into the backside of the
cross to keep it from slipping down. Remember, always, to
bind the M against the front of the cross. Never try to secure
his arms across the top of the horizontal.
In making any wooden blackroom appliance, I suggest you
select a decent grade of lumber, and that it be thoroughly
sanded before use. A coat of varnish will help guard against
splinters, and add a more finished appearance to your handi-
work. Although I have seen crosses made of two-by-fours,
I prefer four-by-fours, or two-by-sixes, for greater strength and
security. With the four-by-fours, you can rout an indentation
in each, where the two pieces join, and thus produce a cross
with a smooth surface. It should be firmly anchored to studs
in the ceiling, floor, wall, etc., depending on its position in
the room.
Leaving suspension for the moment, I'd like to end my sur-
vey of bondage (admittedly omitting a few more exotic con-
siderations, and reserving others for later in the more "ad-
vanced" sections), by adding a few words about the emerg-
138
ing interest in bondage as an art form. The idea, it seems,
came originally from Japan, although a number of American
Masters have worked to perfect it still further. It usually in-
volves the use of white ropes, tied like macrame about the
body of the M. It is time-consuming, and quite a lot of work,
but it can produce a custom-fit network of bindings and it can
form a kind of openwork mummification, in that the M is very
tightly secured, not completely covered. On a firm, tight body,
it can provide an extraordinary sight to inspire the Top to all
sorts of highly charged activities. I have seen a number of
publications with pictures to illustrate the art. {DungeonMaster
has a kit available with detailed instructions.) It is definitely
an art to be experimented with. The details are up to you.

Cock Wrappings. Along with the idea of bondage, many

guys experience pleasure by having all or part of the body
encased in tight binding. We see many items in common use,
and for sale in the stores catering to an SM clientele. Hoods,
especially rubber, are one category. Leather mitts to be laced
tightly over the hands are another. But the most popular game
is wrapping the genitals.
The most widely used material for cock wrapping is raw-
hide, the sort of thongs used for boot lacings. It comes in
either a natural, light tan, or dyed in various colors— most
popularly black. The lacing is usually anchored by being tied,
or overlapped, around the base of the cock and balls, then
wrapped in successive rings around the scrotum, forcing the
balls ever deeper into the sac. When the man doing the wrap-
ping reaches the end of the strand, he simply overlaps the
next and keeps on going. When the balls have been fully
stretched, he makes a couple of return loops, on top of the
existing coils, and starts the same process on the cock. When
this is completed, he can coil his lengths of rawhide around
the whole area, eventually producing a large, heavy mass
of uncertain shape.
This is only one scenario; another is to spread the balls
by an "X" pattern, or to bind the genitals in an upward posi-
tion, maybe even wrapping the entire midsection of the body
in order to enclose them. (One of the other materials we will
139
mention may be better for this than rawhide.)
In the course of wrapping, the M begins to feel a stab of
strain up the sides of his viscera. It is a tantalizing and pos-
sibly frightening feeling, because it will usually hark back to
such an experience as being kicked in the balls during a foot-
ball game. Bound, and helpless to stop the inevitable increase
of pressure, the M watches his prized symbol of manhood
slowly enveloped in the endless coils of leather.
Because the bindings are restrictive to the circulatory and
neural tracts, they should not be left in place for more than
ten or fifteen minutes. But during that time, the sensation is
extraordinary. In removing the rawhide, it is not unusual to
have the Top stand back and simply pull on the end of the
strand. This produces a furious flapping of the genitals as
the bindings unwind, and can cause a peak of shooting
pleasure-pain for the M.
Although it is most commonly used, rawhide is actually not
the best material. It tends to cut into the skin, and can even
lacerate the surface. Being narrow, it takes longer to com-
plete the wrappings, thus limiting the time they can be left
in place. Some of the more astute suppliers have begun to
sell half-inch to full inch-wide strips of garment leather, which
really are a lot better. Softer and more pliable, they have more
of a caressing effect when wound around sensitive flesh. They
will not cut the skin, and it takes fewer laps to complete the
enclosure. The removal, of course, is not as dramatic as the
many coils of rawhide, but once in place they can remain for
a longer period.
Cock wrappings are certainly not limited to these materials.
Almost anything that can be wrapped can be used. A popular
material is an Ace bandage— the same sort one uses to tape
up a sprained wrist or ankle. It is even wider than the leather
strips, and can form a fabulously restrictive binding, due to
its elastic properties. It also tends to generate a greater sensa-
tion of heat than the leather materials, and the resulting pack-
age is still larger and heavier. It can also form a more total
wrapping, covering the balls completely, and it can be wrap-
ped over the cockhead, which is difficult with the thinner
leather strips, and impossible with rawhide. Again, your
140
maximum time is fifteen minutes or so. The only "no-no's"
that come readily to mind are: wire, which may cause a severe
cut; and sticky tape, because you may not be able to get it
off quickly enough to prevent damage. Whatever you use,
remember you are in effect creating a tourniquet, and that
you are playing with your M's most prized possessions.
Flagellation. The second most universal area of expertise
in which the Top is expected to be accomplished is that of
flagellation, or whipping. Most SM scenes are concerned, at
least in part, with the M's receiving some degree of punish-
ment inthis form. These skills are not easily described in the
written word, and need to be experienced for a full under-
standing. The Top really should have felt the sensation him-
self in order to know exactly what he is doing. Each of the
many whips, scourges, etc., has different properties and pro-
duces different sensations. For this reason, I will limit my dis-
cussion, and try merely to pinpoint the most important con-
siderations, as well as to describe the most commonly used
devices.
You will start most frequently with a belt, or other wide
leather strap. Not only will it come most readily to hand, since
you are probably wearing a suitable device around your waist,
but it tends to be easier to control the degree of impact and
pain. A wide, flat piece of leather will leave less of a mark
than a narrow or rounded object, and will not cut the skin
unless it catches the M with the edge portion, or unless the
Top strikes a very hard blow. Most whipping sessions start
gently, gradually building to a crescendo, allowing the bot-
tom to respond to the action as a sensuous pleasure/pain
experience. The ass is the most natural place to begin, but
a good whipping session will eventually involve the entire
body from the neck to the calves, skipping only the area just
above the buttocks where the kidneys lie, and the back sides
of arm and leg joints.
One of the best positions for the M is to be standing (verti-
cal) inthe center of the room, arms secured above his head.
This gives the Top access to every part of his body. Whip-
ping the front as well as the back can be not only sensuous,
141
but allows the M a brief respite in one area, while the S works
on another. A second choice may be to use a whipping post,
which fulfills a fantasy image for many guys, and can simulate
any number of public punishment scenarios. By securing the
M by his wrists, locked onto an eyelet above his head, and
by a C/B harness to another eyelet at crotch level, the Top
can ensure his remaining exactly in position for whatever
punishment may be forthcoming. One point in all these
scenes is to arouse the M, and thus expand his limits. The
use of any fantasy-fetish is justified, and a heavy session can
usually be prolonged and intensified by the Top providing the
proper verbal stimulation in addition to his physical exertions.
Since the pain can reach a very high level, it is quite com-
mon to help the M along with an occasional hit of amyl. A
weight lifter's wide leather belt is a good device to protect
the kidney area.
Many bottoms will tell you, "I'm not into heavy pain," but
a light whipping will excite almost any of them— except the
complete duds. By going through a gradual build-up, with ap-
propriate verbal encouragement, it is frequently possible to
carry a less experienced M much further than he ever thought
he could go. But even a guy who is capable of sustaining
a very severe lashing may be turned off if the Top gets too
heavy too soon. Remember one of our basic rules of SM in
general: Never, ever, try to rush the scene.
In the use of the more exotic flagellation tools (crops, whips,
etc.) the wrist action is important, because many of these
items are not intended to be used with the full force of the
arm. Their purpose is to sting, and the Top can start by flick-
ing itback and forth across the M's back or ass, with gradual
increases in speed rather than force to produce a heightened
sensation. This is another skill you are only going to be able
to develop through practice. If you don't have a human sub-
ject available and willing to act as your practice target, work
on an inanimate object. In any event, before using any of
these appliances on a bottom for the first time, experiment
with it to get the feel. You might also give yourself a couple
of trial snaps across the inside of your lower arm to test the
degree of sting.
142
 There many good sources for whips and attendant devices.
The Pleasure Chest chain carries a wide variety, as do the
popular leather suppliers in most major cities. You will also
find mail-order ads in any of the magazines catering to our
community. (I list a few addresses in the last chapter, after
the readership statistics.) For catalogs and mail-order service,
I particularly recommend: David Morgan, P.O. Box 70190,
Seattle, WA 98107. Although I am going to break off our dis-
cussion here, you will find a number of interesting whipping
suggestions in other sections of this book and within the vi-
gnet ewill
s I provide to illustrate the various other situations
we want to explore.

Clothespins. At the mention of clothespins (the spring-

driven variety, not the slip-on, double-legged prong), many
Tops turn up their noses and indicate that "those are for kids
and beginners." I agree that if you intend to use them only
as nipple clamps on a novice who can't stand anything
harder, this response is justified. However, I have found them
to be much more versatile rn the right hands.
The use of these cheap, easily obtainable little devices as
beginners' tit clamps continues to be the most common appli-
cation.keep
I a few leather-covered units for just this pur-
pose. They are also useful in a foreskin stretching scene: the
M is restrained either horizontally or on his back so as to
immobilize his extremities and to keep him from turning away
from the Top. Two or more (sometimes as many as can fit)
are clamped onto the foreskin. Each clothespin should have
been previously drilled and fitted with a lead— leather thong,
light chain, whatever— and these leads are now used to draw
the clothespins in different directions. Once secured and tight-
ened, the foreskin can be spread out like a parachute. A safe
time limit is probably about fifteen minutes, although most
M's will not be able to take it for that long a time.
I recently observed (and photographed) a fascinating scene
in New York, performed by a friend who has developed an
excellent routine. With the M's arms secured only by the
hands of the Top's lover, clothespins were set in a close, stag-
gered pattern all over the scrotum, then on the cock except
143
for the head. The pain at this point was intense, and the bot-
tom was responding accordingly. When as much of the genital
area as possible was covered, a final six clothespins were
set in a row, three to a side, along the dividing crease be-
tween upper thigh and abdomen. The M was then allowed
one hand free and told to take these last six and set them
one at a time around the head of his dick. By this time he
was at the limit of his endurance, and he was told that as
soon as these last six were in place, he could point one at
a time to the pins he wanted removed. With his hand quiver-
ing, and really on a heavy pleasure/pain trip, the M complied,
placing the final six clothespins around the head of his dick,
completing the porcupine. He then pointed to one pin after
another. As the Top took these off, he reset them in a con-
tinuous line along the under edge of the M's pecs, fastening
one to each nipple as he came to it, producing a pattern like
some barbaric necklace. The sensation was much less in-
tense in the large muscles of the chest, so the M was not
aware of the pain gradually building up here until the bulk
of the clothespins had been removed from his genitals. Then
he began responding to the pattern on his chest area. When
the genital pins had been completely removed, the M was
allowed to take the "necklace" off, one piece at a time.
This is only one of many possible scenarios. Used in large
numbers, clothespins can be excruciatingly painful, without
ever tearing the skin or doing any other actual damage. At
Christmas time, there are often miniature plastic clothespins
offered for sale, ostensibly to hang cards from a display string.
These are very cheap, and they work quite well on an area
where the skin is soft and pliable. Being so small, it is pos-
sible to use a great many of them. So many mundane office
or household items can be converted into interesting
blackroom uses, it takes only an imaginative mind and a
modicum of shopping time to find all sorts of nifty new games
to play.

Hot wax. Another popular and widely practiced art is the

use of hot candle wax. In this scene, the M is firmly secured,
usually on his back, but sometimes the other way around.
144
He may be blindfolded or not; either way has its advantages,
because being able to see may provide a great response as
he anticipates the falling material; or, unable to see, he has
no way to know where he is going to feel it next. My personal
preference is that he be able to watch, because it tends to
produce such fabulous anxiety and muscular stretching to
avoid the contact.
Black candles make for a very showy scene, with each drop
clearly detailed against the skin (or white candles if your sub-
ject is black). My friend who did the wonderful clothespin
scene was able to find a box of black votive candles (the lit-
tle stubbies, made to go in glass containers). He used these
on an M who was suspended by wrists and ankles, able to
move quite a bit from side to side. The votives, after drip-
ping afair amount of wax onto his skin, were set one by one
onto the more level parts of his body. Still lighted, and set
in their own wax, they formed little reserves of molten pools
around their wicks. Every time the M jerked violently to escape
the falling wax from the Top's hand, he spilled some out of
the candles affixed to his skin. Five votives were placed on
him this way before the scene was finished, but he was then
turned over, and the same procedure was followed on his
back.
Using hot wax on the more sensitive areas— nipples and
genitals— is common in many scenes, and can be done so
as to completely encase the cock and balls. The sensation
of pain is momentary as the wax impacts, but unless you use
beeswax candles, you will not actually cause bums. The regu-
lar cheapies you find in the market or novelty stores are usu-
ally fine. The more expensive shops sometimes sell candles
with metal salts in them (silver and gold colors), and these
are best avoided, too.
A scene popular with some Tops involves use of hot wax
against the anus, allowing it to build up there, and to run be-
tween the legs onto the underside of the balls. This also in-
volves the body area directly above the prostate, and pro-
duces aferocious response in many M's. Of course, the
mucous linings are even more sensitive than the nipples or
genitals, and result in a higher intensity of pain. It takes a
pretty heavy M to stand up to this, so be selective.
145
 TT and C/B torture. You may see these abbreviations in
sex ads, meaning "tit torture" or "cock & ball torture" refer-
ring to the use of tit clamps or a variety of cock and ball
stretchers and harnesses, sometimes with weights attach-
ed, sometimes with the genital appliances attached by cord
or rawhide thongs to the nipple appliances, thereby produc-
ing a combination of sensations. (Either form of "torture" may
go beyond these uses covered here as "basic specialties,"
but all will eventually be revealed.)
Just a few words on the term "tit" vs. "nipple." Some guys
feel strongly that nipple is the only proper term, suggesting
that women and cows have tits, whereas men do not. How-
ever, we normally take4he language as we find it, and "tit"
is the most commonly used term. I would say that spelling
the word as "tit" differentiates it from "teat," as applied to
a woman. And any Midwestern farmer will tell you cows don't
have "teats," either; they have "teets."
Someone who has been worked on a bit in the past, and
who has developed a little physical resistance to the sensa-
tions, can be greatly sensitized by rubbing the ends of his
nipples with a fine emery board. The action itself produces
a fantastic sensation, to say nothing of the increased feeling
he has from that point on. Wire brushes or other such abra-
sives are also used occasionally, but if you try it with a begin-
ner you'll scare the hell out of him.
Setting clamps on the nipples, then manipulating them
(twisting or pulling) produces a very erotic pain, and some
guys get off more substantially on this than anything else.
The clamps may be of many different forms, smooth contacts
or toothed, rubber insulated or full strength alligator clamps.
Almost anything that can pinch and hang on, has and will
be used, depending on the M's ability to take the pain. A sta-
tionery orhardware store will offer a wide variety, probably
a good deal cheaper than a toy supplier; but the leather
specialty shop will have them all assembled and displayed
for your convenience. The most popular tit clamps I ever of-
fered for sale were made in Japan, designed to hold material
in place while they sewed it up to make sails for boats. They
were aluminum with rubber contacts, and got tighter the
146
harder one pulled on them. They are available now in almost
every leather shop in the world, and I'm sure the Japanese
manufacturer never suspected the potential popularity of his
little sewing device.
For the genitals, there is a far wider range of possibilities,
and a great many more toys available. You almost have to
visit a supplier or send away for mail order catalogues to get
an idea of the range. Basically, they do one of two things:
They restrict the base of the cock and balls, producing a
heightened feeling and helping to maintain an exceptionally
hard erection. They stretch the scrotum and/or restrict the
balls, sometimes bringing the wearer to the threshold of pain,
without the Top doing any more than placing the harness on
him. In the stretching process, they separate and spread the
balls. With one of these devices in place, the Top will play
any number of games, and these are all part of the "C/B"
scene.
There are also ball press devices, sometimes made to
clamp onto the scrotum above the nuts, forcing them to a
deeper distension. Others are actually applied to squeeze the
balls, causing not only a high level of pain, but anxiety as
the bottom wonders how much pressure his balls can take
before they are forever destroyed. One hopes his initial trust
in the Top's skill and judgment will be justified by restraint
at the appropriate moment.
Unless they really get out of hand, none of these games
is particularly dangerous, except that excessive stretching
can rupture the small blood vessels, especially those con-
nected to the testicles, or in the skin of the scrotum. The
damage will usually repair itself quickly, in a few days, at most.
A serious rupture of blood vessels in the scrotum can cause
a permanent blood blister, unsightly but otherwise harmless.
(A dermatologist can remove it.)
A novice M often whines, "I have very sensitive balls, I can't
take anything touching me there." Bullshit! We all have sensi-
tive balls; it's another case of learning (first) not to mind it,
and (subsequently) to enjoy it. The balls can take a lot more
punishment than most people realize. Not too long ago a
friend of mine lost the ball weight-lifting contest at a club meet-

147
ing because the metal "D" ring on his ball stretcher broke
as he tried to lift 37 pounds. I had a scene in Berlin with a
hot little number who swung 15 kilos from his nuts. (He cried
a bit, but he loved it and came to no harm.) This sort of scene,
needless to say, is straining the limits (to say nothing of the
balls), and you do take the chance of hurting yourself. I offer
these examples merely as illustrations of the extreme. If you
are going to try it, build up gradually to ascertain your limits,
and don't dope yourself up so as not to feel the pain. Pain
is your best and often your only warning that things are go-
ing too far.

Temporary piercings. As opposed to permanent piercings,

which we will consider in depth later on, temporary piercings
take place during an SM scene and are intended to last only
for a short time. Here, the real thrill is the making of the hole;
in permanent piercing the hole is incidental, made only to
accommodate the jewelry or whatever is going to be placed
through the skin. Normally, the parts to be pierced in a scene
are the nipples, the skin of the penis (in any of several places),
or (rarely) the scrotum. This activity may more properly lie
on the borderline between basic and advanced technique,
but I include it here because so many less experienced guys
are doing it.
In any of these piercings you need a sharp needle, the best
being medical suture devices or the type of needle used for
carotid angiography or arterial catheterization. A second
choice is a hypodermic tip, but these are illegal to possess
in most jurisdictions, whereas the others often are not. They
are preferred over sewing needles, because they are sharper,
and they usually come in a sealed container, so the user
knows they are sterile. To do any kind of a scene, you need
several needles— another advantage with the nonhypodermic
variety, since they are generally packed ten to a box. Some
sewing needles are also maked "sterile", although I don't
trust them as I do the medical varieties. Sail needles are also
used sometimes, because of their curved shapes. Regardless
what variety is used, it is important that it only be used once
and then discarded. Never use the same needle on more than
148
one person. (Hepatitis/AIDS!) Your hands should be clean,
the subject's nipple, or whatever you're going to pierce,
should be well doused with alcohol or whatever disinfectant
your druggist recommends as being in use by doctors giv-
ing inoculations. Once the needle is in place, be careful not
to touch the area with contaminated materials, such as hands
covered with lubricant taken from a jar next to your FF sling.
If you use threads, these should also be sterile, and remember
that anything drawn through the opening is going to pull what-
ever microorganisms it contacts through with it.
Remember that a piercing scene is more a head trip than
anything else; the pain is momentary and there is very little
other sensation. It's the idea of having something stuck
through his skin to which the M is responding.
One of the more common scenes starts with the nipple
piercings, two needles being set through the base of each
in an "X" pattern. A similar "X" can be made through the
end of the foreskin (if the M has one), thus infibulating (clos-
ing off) the cock. If there is no foreskin, the "X" can be made
through the frenum, that portion just behind the head, on the
underside, where there is usually a little excess skin, even
in a close circumcision. These three points can then be joined
by a heavy thread, monofilament line, or surgical gut, and
drawn together to whatever tightness seems to produce the
greatest "soaring." The M really has to be into this before
it can be successful, and it should come as the high point
of the scene, accompanied by a proper sequence of sound,
etc. After everything is in place he should be left unmolested
for a while, to enjoy the sensation and the thoughts he is
bound to conjure up.
More simple, single piercings can also be done, and are
very thrilling to a hot, willing M. Bondage is usually an impor-
tant aspect of a piercing scene, since the feeling of helpless-
ness enhances the sensations and the fantasy. Again, be sure
to disinfect the area before you pull the needle out, and im-
mediately afterward. The aftereffects are minimal, as are the
chances of infection with these reasonable precautions. And
at this point I repeat, throw the used needles away unless
you have an autoclave (medical sterilizer); nothing else will
149
do a job I would be willing to trust. Do not use pins, or some-
thing else that happens to be on hand. Use only stainless
steel, unplated: plating material can sometimes flake off to
produce sharp nubs, or contain a metal that will react with
the body fluids.
Ball piercing, where a needle is actually inserted through
the testicle, has also been bandied about as legitimate SM
practice. For a guy with a strong castration complex, this is
a somewhat more painful and highly exciting procedure. In
this sense it is, like all temporary piercings, more of a cerebral
than a physical experience. There is certainly pain, and some-
times a small amount of blood, but the real trip is mental.
Especially if the M is tied down, the action being performed
without his being able to stop or direct it, he can do a proper
Saint Sebastian in his own mind. I am a bit chicken when
it comes to driving a needle through someone's nuts, and
I do not recommend it for the beginner. Suffice it to say that
it is done, and can be done without damage. I do not think
it should be performed very often on the same person, how-
ever, and I leave it for you to work your way up the ladder,
by which time I hope you will have made contact with others
into your scene who will have the experience to guide you
firsthand.
I recently had a letter posing a question for my column in
Drummer Magazine. The guy wanted to know what a classi-
fied advertiser meant when he indicated an interest in
"tacks." My answer was that I assumed it referred to the prac-
tice of nailing a guy's cock and/or scrotum to a board. This
is merely another variation on the temporary piercing scene,
and an interesting discussion of it is included in Dungeon
Master, issue 7. (Although this description omits any men-
tion of sterile precautions, I would suggest they be maintained
if you decide to try it.) The loose skin of the penis (the foreskin
or the collar just back of the head) is literally "nailed" to a
board. The DM article has a photo of a needle actually pene-
trating the head of the dick, itself. . .a bit more painful, but
definitely more decisive. As for the use of tacks, I know many
packages of carpet tacks are marked "sterile," but you don't
know how much they have been handled in the store before
150
you bought them. They are also rather short, and tend to have
a wide shaft, thus liable to make a larger hole than you real-
ly want.
I won't try to go into technique on this, because the action
is fairly obvious and the same cautions would apply as I have
already described. Neither am I suggesting that you go right
out and try it. It really is a more advanced scene, and some-
thing to be done— if it is done at all— as a high point in a good
SM interaction.

Water Sports. Often indicated as W/S in the sex ads, this

refers to a scene involving urine— good old-fashioned piss.
There is a specific no-no on the statute books in a number
of jurisdictions, since some legislators were hep enough to
recognize the number of people who had a "morbid interest
in excrete." There is also a good possibility of transmitting
the AIDS virus if the donor is infected, and the recipient has
any kind of break in the skin or inside his mouth. I am, there-
fore, not telling you to do it, merely recounting a few of the
scenes that do happen— or used to happen.
Proclaimed by the yellow hankie in the left or right rear
pocket, the piss scene used to be one of the most popular
activities, both in one-to-one and group situations. It occurred
in many SM scenes, usually as a part of some other action,
and was a form of humiliation. It involved, quite simply, one
or more guys urinating on another— or on each other. The
piss might be spilled only on the outside of the body— in which
case the danger of AIDS infection would be minimal (barring
a break in the M's skin.) Even before AIDS, it was advisable
not to let any piss get into the bottom's eyes, because a
gonorrheal infection could cause blindness. Pissing into the
mouth, which also used to be fairly common, carries about
the same risk as ingesting semen. It was also great sport,
in the old days, to let go a good stream of piss into the bot-
tom's ass after a good fuck. These activities should be cur-
tailed for the duration of the health crisis, since they would
be the most dangerous (and also rather difficult if the Top
is wearing a rubber, as he should be).
Some guys have worked out the mechanics of a good piss
151
scene, even now, wherein they take only their own discharge.
The Top can elevate the M's legs and lower body in such
a way that when he lets go a flood of piss it cascades down
his own belly, chest, etc. The old days of swapping piss (or
any body fluids) are, unfortunately, behind us.
I am often asked how one goes about generating a nice,
bright yellow piss. The answer is not very difficult. Take a
good daily dose of B vitamins, especially those with a high
yeast content. Since I am more or less of a vitamin addict,
I had an amusing situation take place a couple of years ago
at Oktoberfest in Munich, Germany. I was there with the local
leather club— about 300 crazy, wonderfully celebrating mem-
bers and guests in one of the large (read "huge") beer halls.
We were all drinking beer, which during this period is served
only in one-liter mugs. I finally retreated to the rest room.
Standing at the long, metal trough, I produced a bright, golden
stream that caused one slightly inebriated Bavarian to gaze
at me through bleary eyes and comment on my having re-
leased flood
a of Sonnenschein (sunshine). Unfortunately, in
a darkened playroom, the color is not always so obvious.
It used to be that the first time a guy was stripped, tied down
or forced to kneel (or lie) at the feet of his Master, who would
milk his cock to produce a trickle, then a flood of body-warm
piss, he would experience one of the high points of his train-
ing. The sensation of warm piss across the skin is much the
same as water from a shower head, but the knowledge of
its source puts it in a category all its own. For the giver there
is a real feeling of power and domination. It is common
enough to say "piss on you" to someone, but actually to do
it...
Organized piss parties used to be fairly common in the ur-
ban baths, and many clubs had "wet nights," where those
particularly interested in this form of activity could congregate
to fulfill their fantasies while voiding their bladders. Some
establishments provided bathtubs in their basements, where
a real piss lover could lie down and be supplied for as long
as he chose to remain. In another fairly recent conversation
I asked Penishead (who is one of the great piss takers of all
time) if he knew of any particular techniques.
152
 He said, "Not really. A lot of guys dribble before they shoot,
and that's kinda fun. But piss is only the beginning of better
things to come, and if you're ripped enough ..." And with
that pronouncement, he continued on . . . just as we shall do,
to bigger and better things.

153
CHAPTER SEVEN— The Anal Specialties
Ass play is a centuries-old tradition, popular long before the
ancient Greeks and Persians turned it into an art. It has been
common in almost every culture and has consistently crossed
any heterosexual-homosexual lines. It is such a natural ac-
tivitity that those societies which were particularly concerned
with reproduction and maintaining the size of the tribe were
prone to make sodomy a criminal act. In those early days I
am sure the main reason for any prohibition rested solely on
the fear that excessive anal intercourse, at the expense of
regular heterosexual endeavors, would produce fewer babies,
hence fewer potential warriors and workers. Of course, there
were undoubtedly the same busybodies and emotional
eunuchs we find today, always ready to condemn someone
else's behavior as immoral. We can thank the Judeo-Christian
tradition for compounding this guilt and making it a ritual con-
demnation, despite many of our modern-day problems stem-
ming from overpopulation rather than the reverse. A good
political friend of mine refers to this condition as "mental her-
nia," and I think he has found an apt term for the malady.

154
 In this chapter I want to discuss not only good old-fashioned
sodomy, but also the later derivations: enemas, fist-fucking,
scat, and a few others. Whereas none of these is necessari-
ly new, or necessarily an SM component, they do occur often
during many SM exchanges. Acknowledging this overlap, it
behooves us to take a look at them. I must also add a word
of caution in light of the current health crisis. Unprotected
anal contact is probably the primary source of AIDS transmis-
sion. Much of this chapter deals with "pleasures we used to
enjoy."
Sodomy. The dictionary definition of sodomy will always
be something to the effect: Unnatural sexual intercourse,
especially of one man with another or of a human being with
an animal. A Sodomite is defined as one who practices
sodomy, or an inhabitant of Sodom— the city destroyed by
fire and brimstone because of its evil ways. That is a lovely
fable, worthy of inclusion with a good many other tales of
miracle, mystery and authority. (Some might prefer bell, book
and candle.) But the Old Testament prohibitions aside, peo-
ple have been fucking one another in the ass for as along
as men have possessed the instrument of penetration, and
I'm sure they will continue to do it until we all blow ourselves
into a cloud of nuclear dust. Now, however, we must do it
only with a condom.
To define sodomy more accurately than the somewhat
vague dictionary blurb, it is best to consider how the law re-
gards it.On the statute books of several states, there is no
differentiation made between anal and oral intercourse, both
being lumped together with the laws dealing with "unnatural
acts" or even "bestial acts," and in the latter case would in-
clude activities with animals. We have examined cocksuck-
ing already, and intercourse with animals is really not part
of an SM scene. Because "sodomy" connotes these other
activities, I'm going to stop using the term, and refer to our
specific act by its more specific name— "fucking"— and deal-
ing with man-to-man sex, that can mean only one thing, since
there is only one aperture in the lower regions of the male
anatomy.
155
 In the SM scene, fucking the M should emphasize the
dominant-submissive relationship. Just going through an act
that feels good isn't enough to fulfill the fantasies of either
party. If the fucking is done while the M is in bondage, this
is a start in the right direction. If his ass has been properly
warmed with a belt beforehand, it is even better. In fact, con-
tact by the Top with the hyper-elevated temperature of an
adequately tanned backside can provide an extra element
of stimulation, whereas the abrasive motion of his groin across
the tenderized flesh of the M can likewise stimulate and tanta-
lize. Inmany scenes, the fucking is an on-and-off thing, occur-
ring several times during the session, without either party
cumming as a result. Requiring the M to clean the Top's dick
after each of these fuck sessions (orally, of course), will add
a further, spicy dimension. It will also encourage your M to
come to you with a well-douched gut in future sessions.
The M's position while getting fucked is important, since
this can determine just how much pseudo-humiliation is be-
ing perceived by either party. It lends a greater excitement
if the M is penetrated in some posture where he is slightly
uncomfortable and in no way able to determine the duration,
depth of penetration, or the rhythm. It can all add up to an
acting-out of the rape fantasy. . . his own or his Master's. In
essence, the point I am making is to encourage the par-
ticipants not to throw away the fuck as a part of the entire,
integrated scene. Because it can and does occur as a vanilla
sex activity, is no reason to ignore it as a highly charged SM
act— and properly "showcased" that is exactly what it can
be. Then there are the variations.
Although the relationship of Top to bottom would seem to
be nowhere more clearly defined than between fucker and
fuckee, this is not always the case. This is pointed up in my
questionnaire responses, as well as from personal experi-
ence. Alot of Tops occasionally like to get fucked and many
bottoms also enjoy riding someone else. And there is the large
group in the middle, who swing both ways and take their
pleasure from whichever side they can find it. (Remember
the old quip about the guy who was S only because he had
hemorrhoids!) Although I do not suggest it is good practice
156
for the Top to break the role situation by suddenly demand-
ing that his M fuck him, such situations do occur and, when
mutually agreeable, work out reasonably well. Remember,
we are dealing with individuals, who are more important than
the rules. Whatever two guys do together to produce mutual
pleasure really isn't anybody else's business. I did a little
piece on this in one of my privately published books. We have
the situation of an inexperienced punk in involuntary bond-
age, being introduced to the mysteries of SM by his new Mas-
action: (This sort of thing is okay in fiction.) Here's a bit of the
ter.
His hands were cuffed together and locked onto the col-
lar around his neck. He was effectively immobilzed, prone
and naked in the dimly lighted blackroom. Tim was still
kneeling astride his ass, playing his hands warmly down
the captive's back and shoulders, stroking him almost
fondly. It was a soothing caress, but at the same time it
served to futher excite Gene's arousal. Gradually, the
hands worked lower, playing about his buttocks, prob-
ing gingerly at the cleft between his cheeks. Instinctively,
Gene surmised the intention, then, and tensed in nervous
anticipation. The idea was not without an element of fas-
cination, but the prospect of being penetrated by Tim's
substantial manhood was frightening.
He felt the lubricant being worked inside his asshole,
twisting and groaning in protest until he winced and froze
in pain as the bloated cock was set in position, pressing
easily against the resisting membranes.
"Please," he begged. "Don't do that, Sir. Please! I
mean it!" His words were accompanied by a violent
trembling, as an almost panicked terror seemed to pos-
sess him.
Tim worked for several minutes, easing his fingers into
the opening, gently prying the cheeks apart and coating
the orifice with additional lubricant. Still, the pleas and
protests continued, mounting in their obvious sincerity.
"It's nothing to be afraid of," Tim muttered softly. "The
pain's nothing, compared to the rest of the feeling." He
stretched himself across the length of the captive's back,
157
sliding his arms around the other's chest, resting his
swollen cock within the cleft of the captive's ass.
"Please, Sir," Gene continued. "It's not that I don't
want to obey you, but.. .well, I Just don't see how anybody
could take a... another man's cock up his ass."
As the hoarse, throaty whisper trailed off, Tim slowly
lifted himself from his prisoner's back. He moved more
quickly, then, unsnapping the clips which anchored
Gene's feet. With one strong pull on the side, and a single
hard twist, he flipped the captive onto his back. He then
refastened the ankle chains.
He stood regarding his slave for several moments be-
fore bending to kneel between the widespread legs. Tak-
ing his jar of lubricant, he smeared some of the gel on
both Gene's cock and his own, massaging the two rods
until both were standing completely rigid. Without warn-
ing, he lifted himself above Gene's cock, positioned his
anus aganist the crown and slowly allowed the prisoner's
rod to slip inside him.
Gene moaned and gasped, his head turning from side
to side as the exotic sensation all but overwhelmed him.
The slick, warm enclosure had brought him almost to a
climax, which he now tried to suppress. Tim was all the
way down by then, thighs gripping against his sides. Tim
moved ever so slightly, sliding only a few millimeters up
and down as he stroked his own projecting joint, eyes
locked on Gene's face, watching the contortions of ec-
stasy as his captive tried to keep from cumming. But the
effort was futile, in a trembling rush, all the pent-up desire
erupted, causing Gene to strain against the bonds while
his body convulsed in the throes of this unbelievable dis-
charge. He could also feel the drops of warmth that fell
across the muscle ridges of his belly, when Tim's re-
sponding discharge answered his own.
Maybe not the prime example, and certainly not appropriate
to every scene, but that's the idea. It's a variation, and it can
be interesting. Today of course, we would add the presence
of a rubber. Far more common, and much more likely to be
expected, is for the Master to give his bottom a good ass
158
fucking. This happens in many scenes, although there are
just as many where it does not— where, in fact, there is no
overt sex ending in a climax for anyone. The anally oriented
are going to want it to happen, however, and sometimes it
comes about in more esoteric ways than by the use of the
Master's cock— or the bottom's. This chapter is devoted to
an exploration of these various alternatives. Let's start with
the most common surrogate for the real thing.

Dildoes. The dildo, or artificial penis, is available in sizes

ranging from something slightly larger than a peanut in the
shell to monstrous protuberances that would put Tom of Fin-
land's subjects to shame. They are usually made of latex (rub-
ber), but I've also seen them in plastic, leather, soap, wood,
ceramic, glass, metal, and ivory. The only safe ones are the
softer materials, latex being the first choice of many, with
leather a close second. I suggest you not use one without
some kind of anchor at the base, and avoid the latex models
with wire inside to enhance the rigidity: it's too easy for it to
work its way through the tip and puncture someone's gut.
My favorite consists of a set of latex ends that fit onto a plastic
vibrator. This allows a great variety in size and shape, with
the added eroticism of the simulated electrical pulse. They
all have flanges on the bottoms, to prevent their popping loose
and sliding completely into the anus: a frightening situation,
and
mean.if it's ever happened to you, I'm sure you know what I
A number of guys have reported these accidents to me over
the years, and those who panic head straight for the emer-
gency clinic and all the attendant embarrassment. This may
be necessary, but should it happen to you, react aiittle more
slowly. The object lodged in your ass fit okay going in, there's
a good chance it will come out the same way. Neither is it
going to do any more harm if it stays there for a while. In the
case of a dildo, don't try to turn it around inside you. That's
a sure way to tear your guts. A doctor will probably use a
speculum (an anal spreader, made of steel and shaped like
a long duck bill). If you have one, you can probably extract
the object yourself, taking plenty of time and patience. You
159
may also be able to "shit it out," with the help of lots of lubri-
cant. The best way, of course, is to make sure it doesn't hap-
pen in the first place. Remember, a dildo with balls is the only
way to fly!
Once you have selected a dildo of the proper configura-
tion to insure against accidents, there are many interesting
things to do with it. I've already mentioned a couple of ap-
plications astraining devices— either to teach yourself to take
a cock orally, or to open a guy's sphincter for some heavier
action. As a pleasure-giving instrument in its own right, it can
fill a need in heavy interaction between two guys, as well as
in many JO scenes. In addition to the wide range of sizes,
they can be had with simulated foreskin, with enclosed
vibrators, or with a bent wire and crank to make it "wiggle"
inside the anus. Since the prostate lies in a strategic spot,
the sensations can be quite wild. There are some Tops who
do not fuck their M's, and for them the dildo is sometimes
a viable alternative. There is also an inflatable dildo on the
market; about the size of a good normal dick, it can be filled
with air via a hand pump to become quite large. It sounds
like fun, but I have heard several complaints that they over-
inflate very easily, and burst inside the body.
I will be referring from time to time to a "butt plug." This
is a variation of the dildo, being a hard latex cone, with a
smooth blunt top and rounded edge at the base. Below the
base of the cone, the butt plug is attched to a short stem
(maybe an inch or so in diameter), which once again flares
out to form a flange to prevent its going completely into the
rectum. They come in several sizes, and once inserted form
a total seal. In addition to forcing the M to retain anything
that might have been placed inside him (like a gut full of
water), it also creates a sensation of fullness ... in effect, be-
ing plugged. These can also be purchased with battery-
operated vibr%tors. The plain variety can be drilled and
reamed out (using a coarse or knotted string) to create a chan-
nel from top to bottom. A plastic tube can then be forced
through the butt plug, making it possible to close the ass,
then do your enema number into an already sealed gut. The
potential games are infinite, as you can see, so I'll leave the
rest for you to discover on your own.
160
 It's a good idea not to shove anything up your ass that isn't
made for the purpose or widely used by other people with
no ill effect. Being inventive, especially if you are trying to
take something as big as you can handle, can cause a disas-
ter. This brings another story to mind. In retrospect it may
seem humorous, but at the time I'm sure the participants were
very
of thefarfriend
from enjoying it. I'llitrepeat
who related to me:it as best I can in the words
I guess you know that Al and I have been going part-
ners, redoing houses out in my neck of the woods. Al's
all over that lovey-dovey thing with me, thank God, al-
though he likes to swing on it once in a while. And I've
been letting him, 'cause he's looking good these days— or
was getting to look good. Anyway, I gave him a key to
my house, because the places we're working on are
nearer to me than to him, and if I'm not home he can stop
by here to clean up or get a beer when he finishes bring-
ing materials up to one of the houses, or whatever he's
doing to help me.
So last week, I'd been taking out windows in one place,
and replacing them with new ones. It was an old house,
and it had the heavy slide-up kind with big sash weights
hidden in the walls. It was a hell of a job to get them all
out, but I had it done and the old weights were lying in
a row in the front hall. Well, Al goes by when I'm not there,
to drop off a load of new aluminum frames, and I guess
he decides to have a good JO session. So he takes one
of the sash weights, and somehow manages to shove it
up his ass. And you know, those fuckers weigh ten
pounds apiece. Well, I guess he does his number with the
thing up his ass, and he manages to get it out all right.
Afterward, though, he doesn't feel so good, so he heads
for my house, only I'm not home. So he go§s inside, and
I come home to find him almost passed out in the hallway,
really feeling sick. He'd turned sort of green, and looked
like he was going to die. Scared the shit out of me!
Well, I managed to get him talking, and after a lot of
hemming and hawing, he finally admitted what he'd done.
His stomach is hurting so badly by then, I suggested the
161
best thing to do would be to give him an enema, just in
case some rust or something from the sash weight might
still be up there. So we give him a nice warm water enema,
and then he's really sick! He starts shitting blood, and
he really does pass out for a few minutes. When he comes
to all the way, he's really in pain, so I get his pants back
on him and we high-tail it for the emergency hospital.
I pull up to the ambulance entrance, and wouldn't you
know there'd be two local cops sitting in there, shooting
the shit with this bull-dyke nurse. Well, I go in and I tell
her I have an industrial accident in the car.
"What kind of an accident?" she asks me.
"Well, uh...anal bleeding," I tell her. And by this time,
both cops are flappin' their ears to hear.
"What caused this rectal bleeding?" she demands.
Well, at first I tried to tell her I didn't know, that I wasn't
there when it happened, but that I'd just found him and
brought him in. Well, she wasn't buying any of that, and
in the meantime Al's sitting out in the car, maybe bleeding
to death, so I tell her flat out, "He shoved a sash weight
up his ass, and he's bleeding from that!" I thought that
would stop her, but instead she looks at me real nasty,
and the cops have gotten up by now, and are standing
in back of her, kinda shit-eating grins on their faces.
"Did he shove it up his ass, or did you shove it up his
ass?" she growls at me.
"Look lady," I finally told her. "the guy's a friend of
mine. He went out to vacant house we're working on and
did whatever he did, and then came to me when he felt
bad. I wasn't there. I don't know any more than what I've
told you."
With this, she finally called a couple of attendants, and
they went out with a stretcher to collect Al. All the while,
the cops are looking at each other, and smiling and wink-
ing like they were in the front row at the Old Time Com-
edy Hour, and Yours Truly is about to sink through the
floorboards.
So, they finally got Al into the treatment room, and he
almost dies, but he's going to be all right. They had to
162
do a colostomy on him... you know, sew up his asshole
and cut a hole in his side so he can shit into a bag. It's
going to be there for at least six months; then if everything
goes okay, they'll put him back together again.
The points to be made from this real-life soap opera are
so obvious as to need little clarification. Being in the shoes
(or boots) of either protagonist is exactly the type of situation
most of us wish to avoid. However, the insertion of "foreign
matter" into one's anus is a very popular pastime— again,
not strictly an SM game, but one frequently occurring either
in an SM session, or in the general context (fantasized SM
in a JO game, or a mutual sex play between guys who are
SM oriented). There are plenty of things a guy can shove up
his ass without hurting himself. Which brings us, quite natu-
rally, to our next topic.

Ass stuffing. Shoving various materials up the old poop-

chute is a popular diversion that has intrigued countless peo-
ple for more years than any of us could imagine. Talking to
doctors who have done stints in the emergency clinics dur-
ing their internships convinces me that Al's unhappy ex-
perience with the sash weight was anything but unique. One
of the most common objects, and unfortunately one of the
worst, is a light bulb. The dangers are so obvious you wonder
how anyone could be so stupid, but it happens. . . all, I sup-
pose, inthe heat of passion.
High on the popularity list because of their sizes and
shapes, benign objects might include: hot dogs, Polish
sausages, cucumbers, pickles, bananas, or any other object
roughly resembling the penis in contour. All these, assum-
ing they do not have any sharp edges and are not inserted
with too much enthusiasm, are fairly safe. Certainly, they have
given a lot of people a lot of pleasure. More exotic are the
various small, round objects that can be stuffed one after the
other. Grapes and cherry tomoatoes are the most common.
I remember Penishead telling me about his tomato stuffing
session on a trip to Palm Springs, then laughing as he re-
called the way they kept popping out of him and floating to
the surface as he swam in a pool. I assumed that they must
163
have been cherry tomatoes, but thinking back on it, recall-
ing the condition of his sphincter, they may well have been
the beefsteak variety.
In an SM scene, the very anally oriented will sometimes
get into an ass stuffing session, and the use of these series
of small objects is the most popular. Some of our toy sup-
pliers sell miniature billiard balls, numbered as they are on
a pool table. The game is to see how many the guy can take,
and whether they come out in the exact reverse order they
went in. The stuff er keeps count, and the stuffee experiences
a fantastic sensation of fullness, maybe being punished if the
sequence comes out incorrectly. Hard boiled eggs are an-
other popular item, but make sure they are cooled to room
temperature. An egg will retain quite a bit of heat in its center
after being cooked, and can cause a burn. In fact, one of the
reportedly common tortures in the Iranian Vakilabad prison
(administered by SAVAK before the Shah's overthrow) was
to shove a hot hard boiled egg up a prisoner's ass, then watch
him do the "hot egg tango," as the implanted material seared
his guts. I imagine the Iranian eggs were unshelled, thus re-
taining their heat for a longer time. In our ass stuffing, it hardly
seems necessary to suggest the eggs be carefully peeled,
including the thin membrane between shell and egg. For
those unskilled in the culinary arts, I suggest boiling your
eggs, starting with the water cold, for about half an hour, us-
ing afew drops of distilled (white) vinegar in the water to guard
against cracking. When done cooking, set in cold water with
ice cubes, which makes them easier to peel.
Ice cubes themselves are another popular ass-stuffer, often
alternated with something warm, such as an enema. I sug-
gest soaking the ice cubes in warm water for a few moments
to melt down the sharper edges before use, however. I also
suspect frequent, long-term use of cold objects to be un-
healthy and apt to cause more problems than warm or room
temperature items.
Since many of the popular stuffing objects are foods, eating
them as they are ejected from the anus used to be fairly com-
mon. In the old days, there seemed little harm in doing this
from a well-douched ass. Now, it's just as dangerous as
rimming.
164
 Other than to sound the clarion cry of caution not to use
anything capable of tearing the gut, or an object of such size
and shape as to be liable to go in and not come out, there
isn't much more to say by way of illumination. If you're do-
ing it, you know as much about it as I do, and if you're
contemplating it, you'll use whatever comes to hand without
my trying to suggest anything more.

Rimming. While we're on the subject, more or less, of eat-

ing foreign material extruded by the asshole, let's have a few
words about this popular practice. Rimming, of course, is the
act of placing one's lips and/or tongue against a guy's anus,
and giving him a through massage. Since this is something
many Masters used to demand of their slaves, it is more ap-
plicable toan SM scene than some of the other subjects we
consider in this chapter, I have also seen a number of Tops
do it to their M's as preparation for a fuck. Naturally, this is
a perfect way to contract any number of dread diseases, in-
cluding AIDS. (See chapter on drugs and health.)
Only if you and your partner have been together for a long
time, in a monogamous relationship, will you want to heed
the word of advice from a gentleman to whom I refer, most
respectfully, as The Divine Rimmer: "You go at it gently. Don't
attack it, but work your tongue in and out of the crevice, and
tease the lips of the anus. Get it good and wet, and keep pok-
ing the tip of your tongue into the asshole. You'll gradually
feel it loosen up a little bit, and then tighten back. If you don't
have your hands tied, you can massage the cheeks of the
ass at the same time, maybe reaching between the legs and
play with his cock and balls. In fact, I like to start with a good
blow job, move down to the balls and work them for a while,
then get my head between his legs and go for the asshole.
If you do a good enough job, you'll have your partner ready
for just about anything you want from him. But if you're go-
ing to do it, don't just play at it. Really get in there and eat
it! After you've been doing it for a few minutes, he'll start get-
ting hot enough that you can really push your face right up
there and tongue-fuck him into fits. If you have a beard, or
you haven't shaved recently, you'll probably scratch hell out
165
of his buns, but he'll love it while it's going on— maybe hate
you when he's all scarred up the next day.
"I think the best situation is to have the .guy on his back
with his legs in the air— just like he's getting ready to be
fucked. You can really get into it that way, much better than
if he's standing or lying on his stomach. Of course, in your
kind of scene, you might want to have the M tied down, lying
on his back when you sit on his happy face. Whatever way
you do it, make sure he has as free access as you can give
him."
So that's advice from an expert. Individual techniques vary;
it's a specialty for some guys; an anathema to others. The
ever present fear of hepatitis deprived us of many would-be
aficionados in days past. Now, it's tantamount to suicide if
you try this with strangers.
We progress, now, toward the "biggies" of the anal scene:
enemas and fistfucking. It is hard to explain the overwhelm-
ing number of guys who have gotten into these, except to
note that the activities are extensions of the desire to be
fucked, and the sensations from either of these activities is
even greater. From the standpoint of the bottom, it is easier
to understand than for the Top, since it involves a goodly
amount of work and effort to do it to someone, with the
resulting erotic sensations not being evenly experienced. Just
the idea of working over someone's ass is exciting to many
of us, however, and makes me think back to the historical
accounts of impalement, and how I used to get turned on
reading about them. This was a common and widely used
punishment among the Mongols, and later the Russian Czars.
A man would have a sharp-pointed wooden pole stuffed up
his "fundament" (read: "asshole") and be lifted to stand on
the tips of his toes, while the pole was anchored securely in
the ground. He might have his hands tied behind him, but
more often he was left free to try lifting himself off the heav-
ily greased pole. Gradually his strength would fail and the
shaft would penetrate ever deeper into his body. Ideally, he
would expire with the pole coming to rest on the inside of
his skull, although this was rarely the case. It usually came
out, if at all, through the back of the neck. I've done a con-
166
siderable amount of research on the subject since my younger
years, and supplied several vivid descriptions in my as yet,
unpublished novel on Ivan the Terrible. Some day you may
get to read them.
Well, enemas and fistfucking are far less drastic, although
some of the attendant fantasies may hark back to this more
barbaric time. Before I get into these subjects I want to say
a few words about the "dirty, nasty" scene a number of guys
find so attractive (their words, not mine).

Raunch and scat. For many guys, a raunchy, unwashed

crotch is a heavy turn-on. The odors that normally repel, in-
stead become a beacon to draw him on, to inspire him to the
height of sexual activity. Many who dig uncircumsized men
feel great disappointment if there is not a fair accumulation
of smegma under the foreskin. I have also had a couple of
fistfuckers (Tops) tell me, "I like a little slime up there, once
I get past the first turn." It's all in one's state of mind, another
case where conditions normally perceived to be negative
become a strong attraction. As part of a deep humiliation ses-
sion there are a number of bottoms who really like it "raun-
chy." (What can I tell you?)
Interestingly enough, there are several perfume manufac-
turers now making products that contain the hormonal scent
a male pig exudes to cause a female pig to go into heat. Ap-
parently, this is also supposed to work for humans and make
a man irresistible to a woman. Just how this relates to us,
or to the "raunch syndrome," is a factor still to be explored
in a laboratory. However, frequent visitors to the more popular
sex clubs could probably give them an interesting series of
evaluations and projections.
As to scat, this is the brown hankie specialty, and one which
mercifully few have have taken up. Surely the most dangerous
of activities from a health standpoint, I'll explain it but beseech
you not to try it. The term refers to the use of shit as part
of the sexual activity. The word comes from the Greek, mean-
ing "manure" or "dung," and is proper terminology outside
its vernacular application. An S may shit on his M as an act
of ultimate humiliation, even force him to eat the feces. Or
167
shit may be rubbed on the body, to be used as "slime" be-
tween the two writhing forms. In questioning those who are
(were) into it (I must confess my expertise in this area is some-
what limited), I acquired these few pearls of wisdom. A friend
of mine who lectures on SM at college courses given in this
area, always takes questions from the audience, and has
been known to "salt" the written inquiries with a card reading:
"Whatrehearsed:
well about shit?" His response, of course, is ready and

"Well, that's certainly putting it in layman's language, isn't

it? But there is nothing mysterious about shit. If a man loves
me enough, and respects me enough to take anything from
my body, then he can take shit as well as anything else. I
know from the fact of his doing it, that he is accepting my
mastery without reservation or question of any kind. It's an
act of complete submission for him, and total domination for

me."
Another friend, who occasionally delves into the scat scene,
told me: "Sure, shit stinks. There's no way to deny that, but
once you get past the smell it isn't all that bad. If you eat it,
it tastes just like whatever the guy has eaten, except that it
has a burned flavor to it."
I will not go any deeper into the subject. If you want to read
more, try some of the RFM publications. I will never forget
one of his more classic lines in a novel called Timmy: "I could
smell the fart, so I knew the shit was coming." Unfortunately,
this exquisite prose is now a collector's item, since RFM died
in an auto accident in November 1982.

Enemas. The history of enemas is interesting. The ancient

Mesopotamians and Egyptians apparently used them, and
there are references in anciant Greek and Roman literature.
The "clyster of pipes" is mentioned by Shakespeare (Othello,
Act II), and in Gulliver's Travels, Jonathan Swift has his hero
punished by being given an enema. During the reigns of Louis
XII through Louis XVI, the French court made extensive use
of enemas, especially for ladies of fashion and the male court
dandies. It was considered quite proper for a person to take
an enema immediately after dinner, and at various times it
168
was a breach of social etiquette not to do it. Flatulence, I sup-
pose, was a problem due to the rich, heavy fat diet. These
odors, combined with the others generated by unwashed,
highly perfumed bodies, mouths full of decaying teeth, and
heavy velvet garments in an age before dry cleaning, prob-
ably made for quite an unpleasant atmosphere.
In our own society, the enema syndrome starts for many
at a very early age. A kid is given a big shot of warm water
up his ass by his mother or a visiting nurse, and discovers
a physical thrill he had never experienced before. For many,
the sterile sickroom or hospital setting is so depressing that
nothing seems pleasant at the time, yet later fantasies may
eliminate the unpleasant details and leave the guy only his
memory of the sensual feeling, and possibly the pleasurable
sense of humiliation in having his ass bared, a probing finger
seeking out his anus, and finally a rectal syringe insterted
into him before his gut is pumped full of water. In SM terms,
the taking of an enema is a submissive act, whereas giving
it is the reverse.
For some, the enema or "douche" is merely a cleansing
act, and many guys go through the routine before going out
for a scene or for a big night on the town. Especially if he
is into getting fisted, it is important to prepare himself in this
manner. Not only are most Tops turned off by a gut full of
shit, but the chances of coming through any misadventure
are much better if the colon is fairly well cleansed beforehand.
Even if a guy is not into the FF scene, he may douche in order
to ensure he does not have to take a shit at an inconvenient
time, or fart at an inappropriate moment. Just plain ass fuck-
ing can be taken with much more confidence if one knows
his lower bowel is empty.
But these are very dull reasons for taking an enema. Those
who do it for its own sake have honed the procedures to a
very fine art indeed. Even the uninitiated will be familiar with
the old-fashioned, one-quart rubber bag, either the kind that
doubles as a hot water bottle (with sealable top), or the open
bag variety. Usually of red rubber with a hose, clamp-off
device, and nozzle, these are fixtures in most households.
For true aficionados (sometimes referred to irreverently as
169
"enema queens"), there are many varieties. There are clear
plastic containers that hold up to three quarts, and some guys
have hooked two or three in tandem, and have also altered
the tubes to permit more than one person to share the water
as it flows out.
Although some people prefer to use soapy water — gener-
ally made with a glycerin or "Castile" soap— a plain water
enema is just as effective: better if a guy is going to take them
frequently. The. soap will tend to remove too much of the
natural bacteria in the colon, and thus have an adverse ef-
fect on the digestive process. Because the bacteria will nor-
mally regenerate very quickly, and can be stimulated by con-
suming buttermilk or yogurt, it isn't a very serious problem.
Some of the old Fels Naptha users tell me they have gone
through periods of constipation between heavy enema ses-
sions, blaming the soap for carrying out the necessary
microorganisms. Of course, the cure for constipation is
another enema, if an excuse is necessary, and the prospect
did not seem to upset them at all.
Actually, the addition of anything to the enema water is not
a good idea, unless you are seeking some specific result.
Materials are absorbed by the body even more quickly
through the gut than if swallowed. Adding vodka to the
douche water, for instance, can get a person drunk almost
instantly. (Some guys favor wine enemas.) If you decide to
try this, be very careful of the amount you use. Running a
fifth of booze up a guy's ass could kill him, especially if he
isn't much of a drinker and has not developed a tolerance
for alcohol. Drugs, which are difficult enough to control when
smoked, swallowed, or shot, can be lethal if given in excessive
amounts via an enema, being absorbed almost completely
and very fast. This is also the reason for not using salt— of
which most of us consume far too much, anyway. Anything
with sugar can affect a diabetic much more quickly and se-
verely than if he had eaten or drunk it.
Other than the above dangers— and except for the obvious
danger of AIDS contamination via contact with fecal ma-
terial—and the normal precautions one should take against
inserting anything into the anus that can cut, burn, or tear,
170
ass play with enema equipment is relatively safe . . . relative,
that is, to some of the other things people do. The only prob-
lem you are likely to cause with a plain tap-water enema is
the loss of some potassium from the system, and this can
be replaced quite easily by drinking fruit juices. A salt water
(saline) enema, normally made by adding a couple of tea-
spoons ofsalt to the quart of water in your enema, will have
a tendency to dehydrate the body. A soapy enema, if you
decide to try it, should be made only with the Castile type
of soap I mentioned earlier. These are usually olive oil-based
compounds, and are not especially irritating to the gut. You
should definely not use a detergent, dishwashing liquid, or
medical soap. Not only are they too harsh and irritating, they
will more seriously upset the bacteria balance. They may also
contain some materials that can be absorbed by the body
and cause unexpected side effects.
Remember, there are generally only two reasons for giv-
ing or taking an enema (other than the pleasant feeling). One
is to clean out the bowel, and should thus be a high volume
to promote distension and expulsion of water and waste
materials. The other is for retentive purposes, and under
medical conditions is given in smaller quantities, so as not
to stimulate the bowel to expel it. In an enema scene, the
object is often to cause the taker to feel the need to expel
the material, but prevent him from doing so— either by ver-
bal commands and threats of punishment if he leaks, or by
the insertion of a plug to keep the water in.
With the advent of barium enemas, used by radiologists
to pack the bowel with a chemical solution that must be re-
tained while x-rays are taken, a great array of wonderful block-
ing devices have come on the market. Normally referred to
as "Bardex tubes," these are a series of differently shaped
plastic nozzles with several varieties of inflatable rubber bags
attached to them. The most common is a plastic rectal noz-
zle with a slightly enlarged tip . . . shaped, that is, like a small
penis. Just behind the "cockhead" is a soft rubber doughnut
that can be inflated. When the tube is inserted, the doughnut
is empty. After insertion, it is pumped full of air via a hand-
bulb. These bulbs usually have a screw-down locking device,
171
to prevent the air's being released until the appropriate mo-
ment. Once in place, the gut can be filled with water, and
there is no way for it to escape until the plug is removed.
There are also larger inflatable devices, and even one with
a pair of air bags, one to expand inside the rectum, one out-
side, thus ensuring that the tube stays exactly in place, in-
capable of sliding in either direction. In a hospital, these
devices are designed for one-time use, and are then thrown
away. However, they can be used many times if they are
carefully dried off and packed away after the scene is over.
The best method is to dust them with unscented talcum
powder, and seal them in an airtight bag once they are
thoroughly dry. Although classified as medical supplies, most
of these devices are not in the "prescription" category, and
can be purchased from surgical supply houses or from any
number of toy suppliers. As a precaution against infection,
one of these devices should never be used by more than a
single individual.
For more exotic enema sessions there are also the colon
tubes, simply rubber hoses that are intended to be inserted
into the rectum, or beyond, to carry the enema solution higher
into the bowel. These range from rather modest devices, no
larger in diameter than the tube on a regular enema bag, to
monsters guaranteed to terrify the beginner. These— "grand
colonic" tubes— are intended to really get there and flood the
large intestine. Great care should be taken in using these,
because there are a couple of bends to be negotiated, and
there is sometimes a tendency for the tube to double back
on itself, or to hang up on the inside of the gut. If this hap-
pens, you can cause a tear by trying to force it. In any of these
insertions, it is better to back off when a tube does not want
to go any further.
For purposes of a simple douche; i.e., cleaning out the rec-
tum and lower bowel for a fucking and ass play exchange—
anything short of a full FF scene— the products sold to women
as pussy cleaners work well for us. Some guys even like the
smaller "fountain syringe" better than the straight-through
rectal tip. A small amount of fluid (four to six ounces) is
enough to stimulate the bowel, and bring out most of the
172
material you want to eliminate. Repeating the douche a cou-
ple of times will usually accomplish all you are interested in
doing.
For a deeper, more thorough cleansing, or to achieve the
sensation of fullness many enema enthusiasts seek, it is pos-
sible to get your wish from less esoteric, and more easily ob-
tainable materials. A regular hot water bottle/enema bag holds
about a quart, and should be sufficient for most needs. It is
possible to cause a faster and more exciting rush of fluid by:
filling the bag, sealing it, inserting the tube, releasing the
catch, and either standing or sitting on the bag. (If it tends
to leak around the plastic screw joint, rub a little vaseline into
the threads.) This will cause the water to gush into you. There
are also some fairly inexpensive "in line" pumps that can
be attached to the tube from the enema bag by cutting the
tube in the center and attaching the severed ends to either
side of the pump. The pump itself consists of a rubber bulb
with a valve inside which prevents the flow of water backward,
and pushes it in the desired direction with each squeeze of
the hand.
To get the greatest penetration of water, the gut should
ideally be lower than the rectum, since gravity will determine
the direction your water wants to go. The most effective (and
for SM purposes the most appropriate) position is to have
the subject on his knees, head touching the floor. He can
also be head-down on an inclined board. In a hospital, the
nurse will often have her patient lie on his left side, in a sort
of fetal position. This also utilizes the force of gravity, because
the gut turns downward when the body is in this position.
Colonic irrigation, or the "grand colonic," is probably the
ultimate in the enema enthusiast's repertory, but it is also
fraught with dangers. A long tube, sometimes 54 inches in
length, is used, and water is pumped in from the enema bag,
or enema can— maybe a quart at a time, as described in the
medical books, but more than this for many users who are
doing "recreational enemas." The inflow tube is then shut
off, and the outflow is released, draining the liquid into a
bucket. A single "Y" tube is normally used for this, or it is
possible to insert two tubes, the tip of the smaller pushed
173
into the "eye" (drain hole) of the larger (since the drain hole
is usually on the side of the tube, a few millimeters behind
the tip). Once inserted, the smaller tube is pulled back slightly
to separate it. Just getting the tube in is tricky, as I have noted
before, and the instructions for medical personnel make it
sound difficult and dangerous, because of the possibility of
tearing the colon wall. Undaunted by these considerations,
a great many guys get them in, do their things, and get them
out without any problems. It would be a good idea to get hold
of an anatomy book and study the diagrams of the internal
plumbing before doing any of this, so you at least have a fair
idea of the configuration you are penetrating.
In the 1920's and '30s there was a vogue for colonics, be-
cause people believed it was beneficial to have the gut thor-
oughly purged from time to time. Consequently, there are still
a number of interesting machines to be found— now mostly
in the hands of latter-day medical quacks or enema buffs.
If used carefully, they are relatively harmless, but always with
the potential to cause injury if mishandled. I remember the
time not too long ago when Penishead came into possession
of such a machine, and was giving high colonics to anyone
who asked (and who could slip him a few bucks, or a hit or
two of dope). He was having guys climb onto his machine,
taking large hits of amyl while he pumped their guts full of
water. He never seemed to do any damage, except that one
of his patrons developed an uncomfortable dysentery, later
diagnosed as having been caused by an improperly cleaned
colonic tube.
Which brings us to another vital point. Working with items
that are intended for insertion into the ass, an area we per-
ceive as the dirtiest part of the body, a guy is often inclined
to forget that the tools of his trade should be just as carefully
cleaned after use as they would for insertion into any other
orifice. I can't emphasize too strongly how easy it is for foreign
matter to be absorbed through the colon walls. One of Penis-
head's little faux pas, for example, was taking a douche with
tap water during a trip through Baja California. He came back
with a terrible case of Montezuma's Revenge, and couldn't
understand it, since he had been very careful to drink only
174
bottled water. Also remember the dangers of AIDS Infection
by sharing anal tubes, plugs, etc.
For further information, there are two fairly good books (a
bit pricey because of high printing costs and limited market):
The Complete Enema Guide ($6), Arthur Hamilton, Inc., 315
West 4th Street, New York, NY 10014, or The Enema
($12.95), Platinum Press, 9237 West 3rd Street, Beverly Hills,
CA 90210. (I try to keep them in stock at my mail order of-
fice.) You can get into some very exotic scenes with enemas,
and indulge in some extreme dominance-submission situa-
tions. Starting with the basics I have given you, plus the ad-
ditional information available in other specialized publications,
it is not difficult to develop your own techniques, rituals
tempered to your own tastes. Your fellow enthusiasts, as you
encounter them, will also come up with a world of new ideas.
I might also refer you to The Enema Fraternity as a source
of information and contacts with others who share your
interests — enema, FF, etc. They have a quarterly newsletter
and publish a membership roster. Write: Frank Ball, 1318
Winone, Chicago, IL 60640.
To illustrate more graphically the pleasure to be derived
from an enema scene, here's an extract from a previously
unpublished story, Oh Bob, Poor Bob, by a T.A.I. L. member
who uses the pen name Klistopher Plummer.
"Come over to the house tonight. Be there at eight
o'clock. Oh, and cancel any plans you have for the rest
of the weekend. I have a new toy for you."
"Yes, sir!" replied the surprised and delighted Kaz. If
Gary had a new toy, it must be very special to have him
cancel all his plans.
Kaz had taken the call at work. The first thing he did
when he got home was to pull himself a glass of beer from
the keg— a nightly ritual— and sip it as he wondered what
the new toy might be. Any toy usually meant some ass
play, so he decided he had better clean himself out for
it. He took the beer with him into the bathroom, where
he stripped and took a shower. Using the diverter, he
cleaned himself inside and out at the same time— another
investment, like his beer cooler, that had certainly been
175
worth the price. He felt so good afterward, that he had
another beer. Then he had an idea. He went back to the
bathroom and got out the enema bag. He carefully
measured one quart into the container and hung it low.
Then he settled on the floor and let it flow into his bowel
very slowly. He got up and walked around, getting the
feel of the one quart inside him. It felt fine, so good he
decided to drive over to Gary's with it in him. After all,
Gary had made him hold a two-quart enema for an hour
or more many times, and it was only a twenty-minute
drive.
He enjoyed the feeling of the cramps as they came and
went during the trip across the bridge and into the hills.
He arrived at Gary's house feeling fine, if a bit lightheaded
from the experience. At the door, without so much as
"hello," Gary told him to strip right there on the porch,
hang his clothes on the pegs and go into the big bath-
room. Kaz immediately regretted taking the small enema
at home. The big bathroom always meant a water ses-
sion, and stripping on the porch meant he wouldn't have
any time to get rid of his self-tormenting load. He wasn't
supposed to give himself enemas. This was Gary's ex-
clusive right, but Kaz felt that what Gary didn't know
wouldn't hurt him.
He went directly to the bathroom and was ordered up
on the table, told to lie on his back. Restraining straps
were put in place on his arms and legs, leaving Kaz
spread-eagled. Gary had built the table to Kaz's dimen-
sions, padded it, then covered it with rubber sheeting.
He lay there hoping Gary wouldn't notice the water gur-
gling inside him.
Gary went through the full sterile routine of catheteriz-
ing him first, using a number 16 Foley catheter and mak-
ing sure it was properly set before turning to the enema
equipment. He took out a double Bardex, which is really
just a large Foley catheter, both having balloons to keep
them from slipping out. The double Bardex, however, had
a second balloon to be inflated outside the rectum, seal-
ing itfirmly in place next to the sphincter. It took longer
176
to insert the tube, with Kaz strapped to the table, but his
legs were spread wide and the tube was well lubricated.
The inner balloon was soon in place. Gary inflated both
bulbs, the inner one making Kaz moan with delight as it
also pressed against his prostate. Now the gland was get-
ting itfrom inside, as well as out. Gary attached the Bar-
dex to an enema bag that was filled with a carefully meas-
ured two quarts of water at 1 1 5°F. He attached the Foley
to a new bottle of distilled water taken fresh from the
refrigerator— temperature 45°F. Gary gave Kaz one quart
of the hot water very fast, because he was unaware of
the one-quart, self-inflected torment. As soon as the
pained expression left Kaz's face, Gary let the cold water
fill Kaz's bladder. He knew his M always had at least one
glass of beer as soon as he got home, which is why he
hadn't wanted any piss to escape before he started.
A new expression came over Kaz's face. It hurt, and
yet it felt wonderful! He was naked and helpless, and re-
ceiving hot fluid into his ass, cold into his bladder. He
was experiencing a fullness that verged on real, exquisite
agony. All he could do was lie there, expectantly, as he
watched Gary leave the room. Oh, Kaz.. .lucky Kaz. You're
in such pain and feeling so glad!

Fistfucking. For some reason, this has become the most

popular of the kinky sports practiced by gay men. It is an art
unto itself, quite outside the realm normally considered SM.
However, because it frequently involves the same people,
and because it can and does occur as a part of many SM
scenes, I include it here, and will try to give you enough infor-
mation to make it more understandable to the inexperi-
enced. Historically, there does not appear to be very much
available to indicate that fistfucking has been popular over
the years. It is mentioned in the Kama Sutra, the Hindi book
listing many methods of relaxing and caring for the body.
Here, it is suggested that the person fast for 24 hours, and
undergo a ritual purging. The insertion of the hand is then
done as a gentle, internal massage, particularly in the area
of the prostate.
177
 The practice has apparently not been widely known beyond
Indian society until very recently. Not too many years ago,
I had to lend a print of the film Erotic Hands to a lecturer at
a meeting of American proctologists, because many of them
asserted the impossibility of fistfucking, indicating how un-
feasible iwas
t for most men, and disclaiming the possibility
of the practice being widespread. So prevalent was this feel-
ing, became
I concerned enough to proffer the film in order
to ensure their taking it seriously, hoping to have more doc-
tors knowledgeable enough to treat people who got into trou-
ble through the activity.
Basically, fistfucking is not difficult to do, or to understand.
The bottom's rectum and colon should be thoroughly
cleansed by a series of enemas. The Top's hands should be
well washed, the fingernails not only clipped down to the
quick, but filed to remove any rough edges. The ass is
thoroughly lubricated with Crisco or any of the numerous
lubricants available on the market (Lube, Elbow Grease, etc.).
The Top works slowly and gently at the anal opening, massag-
ing it and the area around it, finally inserting one or two
fingers, working them around until he feels the sphincter
begin to relax. He gradually adds another finger, then another,
and keeps up his massaging motions until he is able to use
all five fingers in a "goose" configuration. By patient and per-
sistent massage and insertion-withdrawal, he eventually is
able to work his fingers, then the heel of his hand, in past
the sphincter.
With an experienced bottom, the relaxation becomes more
or less a conditioned reflex to this usage, and the insertion
of the hand can be done much more easily and quickly, often
with the ass seeming to "suck it in." Only after the hand is
securely inserted, and the bottom seems to be accommodat-
ing itcomfortably, the Top may clench his fist and go in for
a deeper penetration. He should be guided at all times by
the responses of the bottom, and should stop immediately
if the bottom tells him to.
The sensation of the guy taking the fist is one of fantastic
fullness and penetration, with the neural sensors able to re-
spond only to pressure (not to pain), whereas the Top experi-
178
ences a tremendous sensation of domination, while his hand
(and perhaps his lower arm) are encased in a tight, won-
drously warm grasp. Done with care, and with both partners
in reasonably sober condition, the erotic sensations are un-
equaled in any other context. The physical feelings are so
intense as to be almost asexual, in that most scenes are car-
ried out with neither partner having an erection. The ejacu-
lation, iany,
f is going to come later, although the JO sensa-
tion with the hand inserted is extraordinary. The act of fistfuck-
ing is a different kind of eroticism from anything else, and
legitimately falls into the category of "having to be experi-
enced to be appreciated." Tops will sometimes tell you that
once the fist (and lower arm) is well inserted, the greatest
thrill is to feel the bottom's heart beating within the fantastic
warm moisture.
The dangers, of course, are manifold. All the usual risks
involved in ass play are present, including the transmission
of bacterial, amoebic, or viral diseases (including AIDS) that
may be incubating in the gut. There is also a high risk of tear-
ing the intestine, or displacing it (or some other organ) by
the pressure of the invading fist. These dangers would be
greatly alleviated if the practitioners were less prone to the
use of drugs, but this unfortunately has become almost en-
demic to the fistfucking scene. In fact, a good many aficio-
nados will tell you that the use of drugs is indispensable to
the rest of the action, one sensation promoting the other and
each necessary for a full appreciation of the total eroticism.
While in most SM contexts, I am adamant about the Top re-
maining "straight," but have less concern about the M, since
he is unlikely to do himself or anyone else any harm as a result
of being spaced out during the action, this is not true in FF.
If the bottom gets too wired to be aware of what is happen-
ing to him, he can very well encourage the Top to greater
depths than his body can tolerate. It is not uncommon to hear
someone boast of taking a fist all the way to the elbow-
even beyond. You know that this has to be stretching the hell
out of something!
Consider for a moment exactly what the fist is entering.
The walls of the large intestine (colon) are a bit thicker than
179
the small intestine, but still very thin. Have you ever seen a
string of link sausages in an old-fashioned deli? These are
commonly made by stuffing the meat mixture into the well-
washed intestine of a pig. Ours is just about the same thick-
ness. Granted, in its living condition it is more pliable and
elastic than the sausage covering. Still, it can only take so
much abuse before it rips. Sharp fingernails have probably
accounted for more injuries than anything else, but the over-
enthusiastic insertion of the fist comes a close second. It's
a matter of balancing the erotic delights against the poten-
tial dangers. A tear in the gut can mean peritonitis, resulting
from the release of bacteria into the visceral cavity (the same
danger faced with a ruptured appendix), and it is often fatal.
A torn gut can also result in a colostomy— the hole in the ab-
dominal wall with bag attached to catch the shit. I should note,
too, that with all these dire warnings, it is not uncommon for
the Top to withdraw his hand with a minute amount of blood
and mucus on it, and this is not necessarily cause for alarm.
There are many small vessels in the colon, and it is easy to
rupture them during the course of a fisting session. If there
are large quantities of blood, however, or if it appears very
dark, visit the doctor. Removing the hand should also be done
slowly, so as not to literally "turn the gut inside out."
Of course, there are guys who believe that if a little is good,
more must be better. Penishead (sorry to mention him so
often, but he is very big in these anal games) tells the tale
of having a foot stuck up his ass, and getting it caught. With
much strain and pounds of lubricant, they managed to get
it out before a trip to the emergency hospital became neces-
sary. Although I can understand the erotic fantasy, foot-fuck-
ing is carrying things a bit too far. Since the ankle does not
have the flexibility of the wrist, inserting the foot beyond the
heel is foolhardy and less than this is a waste of time. The
Top has relatively little sensation, since the receptors in the
foot are far less concentrated than in the hand. Stopping at
the heel does not provide the bottom with as great a sensa-
tion as a well-placed fist, and there is far less control. Of
course, if you are still going to try this, remember to trim the
toenails just as carefully as you would the fingernails. Any
ragged edges of callus must also be pumiced down smooth.
180
 her the guy who reaches the point where one hand is not
enough, it is possible to do the penetration with two hands
pressed together— either both from the same person, or from
a pair of Tops working in tandem. Again, I think this is strech-
ing the limit (to say nothing of the rectal tissues), but it is done,
and reportedly is a tremendous trip.
In the SM context, fistfucking is* probably more risky than
in a more common, vanilla setting, because the bottom will
often be restrained. Unable to move, he is more dependent
on the skill and judgment of the Top, who may be doing other
things to him, before, during or after the insertion of the fist.
At least the SM scene will usually have better equipment than
just a bed or other flat surface. By far the most convenient
FF device is the sling, available in many designs. Basically,
it is a sheet of heavy leather (although it may be canvas),
suspended by chains from the four corners, and equipped
with straps to hold the legs in place while the bottom lies on
his back, ass at the edge of the surface, open and ready for
the fisting. Ideally, the sling should be hung with the chains
at an outward angle; i.e., with their upper termini farther apart
than the lower ends, attached to the sling. This helps alleviate
the tendency for the surface to swing uncontrollably during
the action, although some movement is desirable.
Other than the sling, the only important item you need is
lubricant. I've already mentioned Crisco or the commercial
lubricants normally used, and strongly suggest you stick to
them. Vaseline or other petroleum-based products are not
as good, because they tend to dry out the skin and mucous
linings, and also promote disintegration of any rubber ap-
pliances you may want to use. I do know of one guy who in-
sists that baby oil mixed with Crisco is the best, but others
would disagree. Dildos are frequently inserted before the ac-
tual fisting to loosen up the ass, and being made of latex
(usually) they do better with a water-soluble lubricant. K-Y
or other brands of medical lubricants are fine for regular fuck-
ing, but not so good for fisting, because they do not retain
their slickness quite long enough, and are available only in
uneconomical small sizes. For guys who like to get exotic
there are a number of products with menthol or other mild
181
irritants compounded to give a sensation of heat. I would ad-
vise you not to try anything stronger: these contain enough
extraneous substances, and more can cause an internal in-
flammation severe enough to require medical attention.
From an AIDS standpoint, fistfucking would appear at first
view— to be extremely hazardous. However, I have several
good friends who are convinced it need not be so, and I must
confess that I find it difficult to fault their logic. They follow
a set of fairly simple (and obvious) rules, and after doing this
for several years they are still HIV negative: Their partners
are judiciously selected; i.e., no street trash, etc. The bot-
tom isalways carefully douched before the action begins. The
Top wears surgical gloves, which are discarded immediately
after the action. Each bottom has his own, individual container
of lubricant, which is never used on another person. There
is no regular sex (fucking-sucking) in the FF setting, and
certainly no exchange of bodily fluids. Safe? I can't see why
not, although the idea still makes me a bit "antsy."
Just a final warning: anyone taking a fist up his ass is riding
close to the edge of danger. At any sign of a problem— rectal
bleeding, pain in the abdomen, discolored feces, a swelling
of the lymp nodes, or any other unusual sensation in the
region— go immediately to a doctor and tell him exactly what
you've done. Any injuries you might have sustained could
develop very quickly into a condition that could kill you. It's
the price you have to pay for the thrill you've received. Don't
let it be more than you can afford.
Now that I've belabored the horrors, let me give you a lit-
tle account of a good enema-FF-SM session, contributed for
one of my private publications by my friend John Meister of
Australia. (John's native language is not English, so bear with
us in some of his sentence structure. I did not want to edit
him too much.)
"Boris" was a sight to be seen. Well over six feet, built
to match, olive skinned, totally bald, a thick moustache
and a full black beard. He was impressive as he stood in
the door of his blackroom, leather pants, boots and jacket
which was open and showed a white T-shirt stretched
tightly over his massive chest. The whiteness accentu-
182
ated not only his complexion, but also all the black of the
leathers he was wearing.
"Boris" did not mind his nickname; quite some years
ago somebody, seeing him and hearing his rumbling bass
voice exclaimed, "My God, Boris Godunoff!" The name
had stuck.
Jack Page, as his name really was, had prepared his
blackroom for a trick who was due at any moment. An
old bottom and protege of his had moved interstate,
where he was now regarded as a good Top'; his lover
was passing through town and it was arranged that he
would stop over for this night at Jack's.
His old mate had described him as "28, small, muscu-
lar, blond hair, trim beard." That was exactly as Jimmy
turned out to be, with an open smile showing good
healthy white teeth, dressed in stark contrast to Jack in
a business suit.
After a few drinks and general conversation, Jack sug-
gested that he clean up, have a shower and get into
things. Jimmy stripped after being shown where to hang
his clothes, and the description was correct. He had a
muscular build; not an ounce of fat marred the golden
tanned body, small round buttocks, short thick cock with
a foreskin hanging down from a cleanly shaven crotch.
Jack smiled to himself. He should have known. Jimmy's
lover was a great one for shaving, a real turn on for him,
especially if he had a very hairy victim.
Jack proceeded to give Jimmy a few good enemas, just
to clean him out, not for fun as yet; after that a hot
shower, and Jimmy appeared smiling with a semihard rod
from the bathroom. With a hand on his shoulder Jack
guided him to the gameroom. Jimmy let out a low whis-
tle when he saw it. The room looked a cross between a
doctor's surgery and a hardware store.
A dental chair, a surgical examination table, fitted with
gynecological leg rests; from hooks, latex and rubber
enema bags, rubber and plastic tubing in all sorts and
sizes and thicknesses. Thick chains hung from the ceil-
ing as did pulleys with ropes, bolts in the floor and a
183
double wardrobe, fitted with shelves containing all sorts
of apparatus; it was all too much to take in at once.
Jack produced a strong calico straitjacket, which he
placed on Jimmy. The arms tightly crossed in front and
the long sleeves tied at the back. "Get your ass on the
table." Jimmy did. His legs were now strapped in the
braces, his chest and shoulders firmly tied to the table
with heavy leather belts; he was immobile.
A hood made of rubber was drawn over his face. It had
no shape, but was closed with a zip, then inflated with
an air pump to form a black balloon around the head. In
the front of the straitjacket, two circles were cut over the
pectoral area, allowing tit clamps to be set and attached
to rubber ropes hanging from hooks in the ceiling. Pull-
ing the clamps tighter forced the tits out. A ball stretcher
was placed with two more ropes stretching the sac. Jack
took a set of earphones, laid it on Jimmy's neck, press-
ing the phones against the black rubber. A switch of the
cassette and Jimmy experienced sound as he had never
before. In his cocoon it engulfed him totally; nothing else
seemed to exist any longer as no sounds from the room
could penetrate his artifical world.
He could feel the tension on his tits and balls, but at
the same time it could have belonged to another body.
His ass was now probed, and slowly but surely a long,
thin colonic tube went all the way up. After that a Bardex
balloon was inserted, both connected with the enema
bags, valves letting a slow but steady flow of water, pen-
etrating high as well as low in the abdomen.
Mozart's arias, filled his head. Far, far away he could
feel warmth penetrating his body. But still feeling de-
tached from it all he started to dream, to float and was
totally oblivious of anything else.
Jack left him there, had a piss, cracked a can of beer
and watched TV for a while. The sound had stopped; dead
silence was now in the balloon. Slowly, Jimmy became
aware of the enormous pressure in his lower part; his tits
and balls started to ache; the Bardex balloon felt like a
giant's fist embedded in his guts. Suddenly he screamed
184
into the black void. With a small rod, Jack had hit the rub-
ber ropes; vibrations like waves went through the body.
Jack could play the ropes like a violin, softly stroking them
or giving them hard slaps, creating strong movements,
ebbing away as the ropes got back to their original ten-
sion. Itwas not pain that Jimmy experienced, but the
wildest sensation ever. His tits and balls stretched, pul-
sated and tingled just depending on the density of move-
ment. Jack started slapping the ropes with his cane in
earnest, never using a pattern, never knowing which rope
would be his next, as Jimmy screamed into the rubber.
Tied down as he was he could not even squirm. Only mus-
cle movement was possible for the long minutes that Jack
kept up this fiendish torture. For Jimmy it seemed an eter-
nity before he stopped, unstrapped him and let him relieve
the load of water.
At a disposal store Jack had picked up a parachute
harness. This was now strapped onto Jimmy, then
hoisted up. Feet in restraints were also pulled up so that
they were now higher than the ass, which was also
hoisted. Jimmy just hung in there, not fully horizontal,
but exposing his ass to the fullest.
After probing the hole and opening it with various sized
ass intruders, Jack greased his hand and slowly inserted
his fingers. It took a long while before Jack's fist was in-
side the ass. It had been a struggle. Like anything else
on Jack, his hands were huge. During the interim Jimmy,
whose hands were left free, had clutched many times at
the inhaler and shoved it into his nostrils to get some re-
lief. Now the hand was fully in and he could feel a fist be-
ing formed and Jack started to pump him... hard force in-
vading him, posessing him, seeming to open his body
while he floated in a misty haze of amyl and his own
imagined vistas... fog shrouded swamps with warm mists
rising to engulf him.
The tenuous agony of the hand coming out was as great
as the going in, the sensations of stretching hurt, always
on the edge of a terrible chasm of pain, but never quite
falling into its black morass. Jimmy lay panting, relaxed,
185
catching his breath as his body slowly returned to nor-
mal. Then suddenly he jerked as something freezing cold
was shoved up the sorely stretched hole. From his posi-
tion he could not see what had been inserted, but it was
turning his insides to ice. A second and a third were
shoved in. Jimmy squirmed and twisted as he felt that
cold fire continue. From his vantage point Jack could see
the anus contract and loosen in spasms. It amused him.
"Come on, lay your eggs. Push them out."
Suddenly the anus opened and the first of three sol-
idly frozen tomatoes followed suit. Jack picked them up
and showed them to a startled Jimmy. "Ever laid
tomatoes before? Now, I'm going to defrost you." He
showed Jimmy a string of heavy steel balls that he had
held under the hot water tap. One by one he shoved it
up the hole until the whole string had disappeared inside.
Two kilos of steel were now up Jimmy's ass.
After a little while Jack lowered Jimmy's body so that
his ass was only some six inches off the floor, legs still
higher than the rest. "Push the first ball out." Again the
ass pulsated before the shiny steel ball appeared, pull-
ing at the rest of the mass inside him. Jimmy gasped and
took another hit from the inhaler as Jack seized the chain
of steel balls and slowly, one at a time eased them out,
allowing them to clank against the floor.
Jack let him down to rest a while, having a beer and
a smoke. Jimmy explored the room a bit and was highly
impressed. "It would take a month of non-stop activity
to find out how everything is used. Wouldn't mind com-
ing down for a longer period," he said, hoping for the
invitation that came immediately.
"You're welcome anytime and for whatever period.
We'll keep you busy. While I'm at work I have a few friends
who are free during the days and will gladly entertain

you."
"Thanks very much. I'll look forward to that," Jimmy
said appreciatively.
He was especially admiring the peg boards with a huge
collection of whips, paddles and cats. Jack explained that
186
he had been collecting for quite a number of years. Every
time he went overseas, as a souvenir, he would look for
a new whip or quirt. Many of his friends had also added
to the collection in the form of presents. Jimmy held a
paddle that particularly interested him. The core was
wood, between two layers of thick hide, held together
with intricate weaving of thongs through many holes in
the sides. Extremely well made and inscribed by burning
"The Boris Banger."
"It sure looks like a banger, Jack. I see it's inscribed
with your nickname."
"The guy who called me that became a good friend of
mine and made it for my fortieth birthdr r, I can tell you,
it's extremely effective. Want to try it';
Jimmy turned the paddle over in his hand, groaned and
glanced up at Jack.
"Well, I'm not sure of the language, but I'd translate
it as affirmative."
Jimmy's wrists were put into restraints, attached to a
rope in the ceiling, pulled up... ankle restraints attached
to hooks in the floor so that he stood, legs apart, hands
high up, stretched, vulnerable and exposed.
Jack took time choosing a cat. It was one made of green
leather. The handle was a work of art, plaited in different
colored leathers. Very lightly he started to whip the
shoulders and back of Jimmy's legs, repeating the same
pattern, but each time increasing the strength of his
stroke. Meticulously, he let the cat fall again and again.
Sweat started to appear on the body he was whipping.
Moans and groans were now quite solid as he concen-
trated on the shoulders and Jimmy became more vocal.
The shoulders turned from a bright pink to red with a few
stripes, as Jack laid it down hard. Jimmy yelled.
The same was done to the upper legs. The cat, on the
softer flesh, was more painful. The victim swung in his
bonds, moaning, groaning, and yelling, depending on the
force of the blows. Soon the legs, too, were striped and
some welts showed clearly. Jack let his captive swing for
a little and looked at the prime target that he had so far
left untouched.. .the buttocks.

187
 Nice, round, firm, perfect and close together, an excel-
lent working area for the "Boris Banger." Jimmy had
stopped swaying and started to concentrate on the point
where he knew he could feel the pain... his buttocks, ob-
viously left for the finale.
Jack took no warming up time as he slammed the cat
solidly against the tight little ass. Bad luck for Jimmy, as
he tried to twist and turn away from the strokes. Jack
stood his ground, feet apart, landing his blows, hitting
hard at what should have been the same spot. Now the
cat landed on whatever surface presented itself, leaving
stripes and welts. Soon Jimmy was screaming, but Jack
kept it up for another fifteen or twenty minutes before he
stopped and let his subject have a breather.
The solid banger felt heavy but good in Jack's hand.
His friend had made a perfect grip in the handle. Tapping
gently at the swollen, bruised buttocks, he measured
distance before he landed the first of ten with force.
Jimmy screamed and his screams became more inten-
sified with each stroke. His whole body felt a mass of
white pain that exploded into the stars when the banger
slammed onto his ass, screamed uncontrollably as the
last, the hardest, fell.
Jack undid the ankles so Jimmy could stand properly
and let down the rope a bit so he could twist and con-
tract his body as he wished to find his composure again.
Standing in front of Jimmy, Jack undid the wrists and
placed the arms on his shoulders. Jimmy encircled the
strong neck and held on for a minute while Jack rubbed
his back and felt the welts on his buttocks. Slowly he
pushed Jimmy a little back from him so he could look into
his face, kissed him, and said, "Ready for bed, and some
good old-fashioned fucking?"

188
CHAPTER EIGHT— Setting the Scene
Before delving into the increasingly more advanced activities,
I think it would behoove us to pause, to take a look at the
equipment and facilities we should have ... or at least con-
sider how to make the best use of our space and our senses.
We have already looked at the basic blackroom equipment,
but there are some less obvious fixtures deserving a few
words. I will try to supply these, plus some suggestions
regarding use of the five senses.
I have been using the word "blackroom" almost inter-
changeably with "dungeon," so perhaps I should clarify
these. If a guy has a room where he performs his SM activ-
ity, and it is possible to do so, he often paints it a dull (matte)
black to emphasize the darkness usually associated with
heavy SM behavior; from this we derive the term "black-
room." Sometimes, if the Top is heavily into photography the
room will actually be painted a dark maroon or brown, which
often photographs blacker than black. "Dungeon" I assume
anyone understands, although it usually (in classic terms)
referred to a basement, or sub-basement. In our usage it may
be the attic, or any other room devoted exclusively or part
time to our activities.

189
 Like any other sexual encounter, SM is a sensual ex-
perience. Inthis it is not unique; but it does tend to be a more
intense experience than more vanilla exchanges. A good SM
session will probably last longer than a regular suck-fuck
(three to four hours being average), and will probably involve
more areas of the body— certainly on the M's part, and often
for both partners. Ideally, there is a total physical and emo- ,
tional involvement, in which it is important— if not essential—
that mind as well as body be completely oriented toward the
activity in this specific space at this particular time. For this
complex of reasons, whoever sets the scene (usually the Top)
should do everything he can to direct all attention inward,
toward the center of action.
It may sound like a contradiction in terms to state that the
setting should be comfortable, since the Top is about to do
everything he can to create the opposite effect upon his "vic-
tim." Well, if you believe that, you've been missing the boat!
Whatever pain or other discomfort is about to be dispensed,
it must be this pain or this discomfort upon which the M's
full sensual spectrum is focused. He should not, for instance,
be responding to a shooting pain down his leg as a result
of a misapplied restraint, while the Top is doing a number
on his nipples or ass. Likewise, he should not be shivering
because the room is cold, while his Master attempts to warm
his backside.
There are two main considerations in establishing the set-
ting for your action: First, eliminate the distractions; second,
establish the atmosphere in which you wish to operate, and
in which you feel your partner will be able to function at his
best. This is usually the Top's responsibility because it is
ideally happening on his turf. If the M is providing the space,
then it's up to him to do it properly.
Since we have five basic senses, it follows that we have
five basic considerations: tactile (sense of touch), including
temperature and whatever comes into bodily contact; olfac-
tory (sense of smell), auditory (sense of hearing), optical
(sight), oral (taste). Let's take the easiest first.
The sense of taste is something controlled almost ex-
clusively bythe Top, since it is he who will determine which
190
substances are going into the mouth and onto the tongue.
I don't think we need say too much about this, since the alter-
natives are fairly obvious. I might suggest, however, that the
fastidious housekeeper use some judgment in his cleanup
between sessions. Gags and other oral insertables should
not be cleaned with a solution that leaves an unpleasant
residue. New equipment, especially a leather gag, should be
worked over ahead of time to remove whatever the manufac-
turer may have left on it. Leather dyes can be toxic, anyway,
and you should take care your M (or you) does not swallow
any appreciable amount of harmful or evil-tasting material.
Both leather and latex can be disinfected (including for the
AIDS virus) by either alcohol or a diluted bleach solution. I
prefer alcohol, as it is less harmful to leather. But rinse it off
before it goes into someone's mouth.
The sense of smell, which physically contributes to the
sense of taste, is a little more of a problem. Some odors are
a turn-on to one guy, and the complete opposite to another.
The room itself should probably be as odor-free as possible,
though I have never found that the faint lingering trace of
amyl, grass, or urine seemed to make much difference. Since
these are the most common scents in a blackroom, guys with
any experience more or less expect them and respond posi-
tively, iat
f all. The strong scent of Lysol or incense may be
distracting, as will any overpowering odor "hitting you in the
face" as you enter the room. Use your own judgment, but
you should be aware of the potentials. Probably most impor-
tant isyour own body odor, or lack thereof. Some guys, as
we have already noted, are very turned on by an unwashed
crotch or asshole; others are not. It helps to know your part-
ner beforehand, but the odds are in your favor if you are at
least reasonably clean. Very few guys are turned on to a sour
body odor or bad breath. If, as a Top, you are repelled by
an M with bad breath or smelly asshole, it is a good idea to
have a supply of mouthwash and a douche hose in your
bathroom. There is nothing wrong in demanding that your
partner use them; it's a good way to start the discipline.
From the negatives, Jet's go to the positives for a moment.
The sense of smell can definitely work in your favor. Most
191
SM guys are conditioned to respond sexually to the smell of
leather, some to rubber, each of which has a strong, distinct
aroma. Amyl is also a sexual odor for many people, even if
they do not actually want to sniff it. Used just as a "room
odorizer" (the way the bottle defines it), any of the standard
"sniffs," especially if they are a bit rancid, smell like old boots.
A lot of guys react positively to this. Consider your partner
in making the choice, but be aware of such potential scents
as: beer and/or booze, cigarettes, soap, fresh vs. stale air,
something burnt (hair, candle wax), grass, sweat, anal, or just
a clean body odor. I can't run down all the possibilities, espe-
cially as these will vary by geographic area and specific set-
ting. You should simply be aware of the possibilities and use
them.
The sense of hearing is the first of the "big three," and
particularly important near the beginning of the session. Later
as the action progresses, the participants should become less
aware of outside sounds. If you use music as a background—
and I suggest you do— its primary purpose is to establish the
mood. You may also want it to mask other sounds: to obscure
distracting noise from outside your area of interaction, or to
hide the sounds of your own activities from your neighbors.
These motivations may be important onJy for logistical rea-
sons, but you should try to balance this with your own need
to establish a proper sound to accompany your activities.
The selection of music and the manner in which you repro-
duce itin your blackroom is extremely important. While it
should fill the void and occupy the neural receptors for sound,
it should not intrude or distract. Eschew vocal selections: a
person has a tendency to try to hear the words of a song or
aria; and music for a vocal line, so popular everyone knows
it, may have the same effect. Try to pick something fairly ob-
scure, especially if you're into classical. For instance, you
might feel that Ravel's Bolero or Wagner's Ride of the Val-
kyries has exactly the pace you want, but most people are
too familiar with these pieces, and may have heard them in
some comical setting. The last thing you want to do is cause
your partner to laugh, or to think of a situation outside your
immediate area. For this reason, I find Richard Strauss,

192
Sibelius, even Shostakovich preferable to the more popular
composers (Tchaikovsky, Brahms, Beethoven) because their
music is less apt to have distracting, outside connotations
for my partner. Longer selections are better than a series of
short ones, because they do not shatter a building mood.
Since tastes vary, it's a good idea to have a variety of music
available. For some, the heavy classical things may be dis-
tasteful enough to negate their intended purpose. I'd sug-
gest a more neutral range of music until you know your part-
ner's preferences. Avoid disco, unless you are both heavily
into it, likewise jazz, ragtime, or pounding rock. Country-
western usually has a vocal line, but some guys don't like
anything else. Try to avoid it for that very reason: it's going
to draw his attention away from you. The trippy electronic
music you frequently hear in sex clubs is often a good com-
promise, things like: Tomita's Planets, Jean Michel Jarre's
Oxygene, Magnetic Fields, or Equinoxe.
I would also suggest you invest in a tape player. The radio,
even FM, will often stop at just the wrong moment to sell a
product or advise you of the services offered by your local
VD clinic. Records are a nuisance, even on a changer, since
they can stick or need to be turned when your hands are full
of lubricant. A tape with a continuous loop is best. It may
repeat itself before you can stop to change it, but it will never
just end and leave you in silence.
In making your musical selections, I would suggest for
popular things (if you are not already up on them), keep a
pad in your pocket, and when you hear something appropriate
on the radio or elsewhere, note it down. I can't give you much
of a list because it would soon be out of date. Classical music
is far more stable, and generally universal. I also know more
about it. Let me give you a few of my choices. You may use
these as a starting point, at least, if you do not know much
about this type of music.

A. General background. Unobtrusive, slightly "trippy" if

you're using a little grass or whatever. Just obscure enough
that your average M will not recognize it, or associate it with
some past recall. If you tape these for blackroom use, you
193
do not have to do much editing.
Richard Strauss: Sinfonia Domestica
Gustav Hoist: The Planets
Dmitri Shostakovich: Symphonies 7, 10, 12, 15
Gustav Mahler: Symphonies 6, 7, or 9
Jean Sibelius: Symphonies 2, 5; Finlandia, Four Legends
from Kalevala
Paul Hindemith: Kammermusik (particularly No. 4)

B. Lighter music, more popular and better known. More

chance of evoking recall on the part of M, but definitely music
of a more romantic quality.
Richard Wagner: Overtures to Tannhauser, Die Meistersinger
Giuseppe Verdi: Overtures to almost any opera except Aida
(too familiar)
J.S.Bach: Any of the guitar transcriptions (Parkening,
Romero, etc.)
Serge Prokofiev: Symphony No. 5, Alexander Nevsky (cut
vocal solo), Lt. Kije, Le Pas D'Acier
Zoltan Kodaly: Hary Janos
Gustav Mahler: Symphony No. 1

C. Film scores, most of which contain classical adaptations,

but need editing to eliminate pieces that are sure to distract
(such as Blue Danube Waltz in "2001").
A Clockwork Orange
2001
Chariots of Fire
Captain from Castile
Midnight Express
These suggestions, all selections I have used at one time
or another, are just a starting point; there is no way to predict
exactly what any individual will find acceptable. There are
also tapes available (or you can make your own) of "dungeon
scenes," where live tape picks up both sounds of action and
whatever music was playing at the time. I don't suggest these
as long-term background, but they can be useful at specific
points, possibly when the M is blindfolded, and well into the
scene.

194
 The sense of sight, on which we are most consciously
dependent, is the one we find most frightening to lose. For
this reason, a blindfold is a popular and widely used tool in
many SM scenes. I know of several good Tops who consis-
tently blindfold the M before he ever enters the blackroom,
so that he never sees the area of action no matter how many
times he has been there. Whereas this can be very exciting
for a more experienced bottom, especially if he is submitting
himself to the tender mercies of a very trusted Top, I don't
recommend it for the average beginner. Not only can it freak
him out, there is also the possibility of causing vertigo (dizzi-
ness and lack of balance, maybe even nausea). You will have
to use your own judgment on this, but assuming the M can
see for at least part of the time (presumably at the beginning
of the session), exactly what he sees can be important. And,
regardless of the M's condition, the Top is also going to re-
spond to his visual perceptions. Even if only on a subcon-
scious level, a good part of his "turn-on" is going to depend
on what he sees.
The first thing we think of is lighting . . . bright, dark, white
vs. color, steady vs. flashing, etc. It can be a powerful force,
and should certainly be contrived to produce the best pos-
sible results. Although a few guys like the room to be bright-
ly lighted, most do not. "Dark as possible" is often the best
way to do it. This presents some problems for the Top, since
many of the toys he is going to use are difficult enough to
manipulate in bright sunlight, and trying to do it in the dark
can make him appear inept. There are also some desirable
effects to be produced by using different colors, or even an
electronic screen with variable patterns according to the
sounds from your stereo.
Color sets the mood. Red or amber are warm, and also
the most flattering since they tend to obscure skin blemishes
and wrinkles. (Some guys need all the help they can get!)
Unfortunately, many men do not see very well in the red spec-
trum, and may find it more difficult to slip the little steel tongue
into the hole of a black leather harness. Some psychologists
also suggest that red will intensify hostility and tension, but
other experiments indicate this to be true of all artificial illumi-
195
nation. If you work in this semidarkness, you might keep a
flashlight handy, or use a shielded, brighter light in some
specific area, where you can position your M during the most
critical fittings.
A combination of red and blue lights will still maintain a
"warm" aura, as will a candle or an oil lamp. I do not really
like the cold hues in a scene (green and blue without an ad-
mixture ofred), and using too many colors can give the sensa-
tion of moving about inside a great Christmas tree. Likewise,
I find flashing lights a distraction, especially a strobe, unless
you are using this for a specific, short-term effect. For in-
stance, aglobe which turns red or blue according to the music
pitch or volume is okay, while one of those huge flashing
screens may be too much, especially in a small area. I have
seen a strobe used effectively, but only when the guys are
well into the scene. In the specific instance I have in mind,
the M had been blindfolded for an hour or so, and had been
given a fair amount of grass and amyl. When the hood was
removed, he was placed in front of a mirror and subjected
to a strobe during a relatively heavy whipping sequence. It
was very effective, but the circumstances were exactly right.
With a hooded M, of course, the Top may simply turn on
the lights until the blinding device comes off. This may be
especially enjoyable if one is working on a firm, attractive
body, where the sight of defined, muscular flesh struggling
against his bonds provides the proper stimulus. Regardless
of your desired effect, I would suggest that a bright light
source be available in the event of any problems. It's a safety
precaution you can not afford to overlook.
Lighting aside, what, exactly, is your M going to see when
he enters your blackroom? If he is young and inexperi-
enced, isthere anything hanging or sitting there in plain sight
to freak him out? I recently spoke to one excellent Top who
confessed that he had made the mistake of leaving a large,
evil-looking hook hanging in the center of his room. He used
this in conjunction with a pulley to hoist an M in a suspen-
sion harness; but to the entering novice it appeared to be
a meat hook that might pass through his anatomy. Sometimes
the sight of too much equipment (whips, hanging chains, etc.)
196
can frighten an M, although it may well excite the more experi-
enced guy, and just knowing how much equipment you pos-
sess will reinforce his confidence in your qualifications. The
condition of your dungeon is going to speak for you: neat and
orderly, well organized, sloppy, dirty and confused, etc. I don't
say one is necessarily more desirable than the other, but you
want the room to reflect your style and personality.
The final sense is tactile, or touch. This includes tempera-
ture. Ifthe room is too cold, no one is going to function as
well as he should. Sometimes excessive heat can produce
the sweat you desire, but it can also sap a person's energies.
The time to think about this is before your partner arrives.
I have found cold to be much more a problem than heat, but
either can work for or against you.
The texture of whatever you touch, or whatever touches
you, can produce very interesting effects. Leather, of course,
is obvious. The feel of a leather-clad leg against the cheek
of a kneeling slave is a standard fantasy, or the rubbing of
a strap across the skin that is soon to feel its impact. These
are all sensations we know and love, and hardly need discuss.
But what about the less universal sensation? If your M is bare-
footed (as he should be), how does the floor feel against the
soles ot his feet? If you're wearing boots (as you should be),
you may not be aware of the effect this contact is having on
him. Because of the type of scene I am usually into, I nearly
always have rubber sheets on the floor. These have a positive
feel, and tend not to be as cold as wood, cement, or vinyl.
However, the rubber may cause the M's feet to sweat a bit,
and if there is loose grit it is apt to stick to his skin and distract
him. Moisture may also divert his attention, as will any loose
objects he may step on. I know I'm not telling you anything
new, but these are all things to consider before the action
starts.
Placing a guy into restraints is a skill all its own, and it repre-
sents a very high point in your exchange— -much more for
the M than for the Top. It is the moment when he is physi-
cally surrendering to you. The sensation should be height-
ened by whatever he feels. He should not, for instance, feel
you fumble. He should experience a sensation of tightness,
197
of firm restriction that tells him he is really bound and helpless.
If you are using metal restraints, they are probably going to
feel cold going on. Especially if he is blindfolded at the mo-
ment of contact, do something to prepare him for it. Tell him
what you're going to do, or let him hear the clank of the cold
steel that is about to be placed upon his body. Make it a
positive sensation, rather than an unexpected shock that
makes him jump.
Use your hands against his skin. Human contact is very
important in establishing a rapport to bring your heads closer
together. Some Tops like to wear gloves, which is okay, but
use them. Let him feel the leather (or nylon) pass across his
skin. If you have special toys— gloves with prickers, scourges
with studs, paddles with holes— let him feel these before you
use them on him. If the restraints are supposed to bear any
weight, make sure they are tight enough to give a sensation
of support without the distraction of something cutting into
the skin. If the M can see, many of these things can be done
visually, but if he is deprived of sight, the sense of touch be-
comes much more important. Be sure it is working for, not
against you.
Pain may be paramount to your trip, but pain in an SM
sense should also be pleasure. This is our greatest point of
departure from the norm, our main perversion, if you will. To
us, the giving or receiving of pain is not, or should not be,
a negative. It is in this area the Top displays his greatest de-
gree of skill. And there is no universal standard. With some
bottoms you have to start slowly, building toward a crescendo.
With others, a heavy whipping or use of hard nipple clamps
may be the way to start. You have to read your M, and he
should know more or less what to expect from you. After the
first session, you know better where you are going.
Specialized equipment for specific scenes is a subject I
have been trying to cover within the applicable areas of dis-
cussion. However, there are a few items of universal utility
on which I would like to comment. Most blackrooms are
equipped with some sort of hanging chains or ropes to sus-
pend either the M directly, or some equipment to be used
on him. These are frequently secured at one or both ends
198
with two-headed clips. The upper terminus of the chain (or
rope, cable, whatever) is often set into an eyelet or hook in
the ceiling. For eye appeal as well as security, I have found
the best suspension device to be chain— good heavy links
that could probably lift an elephant. By connecting these to
large ceiling hooks or eyelets screwed into studs, I never have
to worry about their coming loose, or not being strong enough
to take the abuse they are being given. They also require the
larger clips, because the small ones will not open wide
enough to enclose the links. This insures against one break-
ing at the wrong moment. If you are setting up for the first
time, I strongly recommend purchasing half a dozen lengths
of this heavy chain (six to eight feet long— two to two and
a half meters) and the other fittings to accommodate them.
Always err on the side of too much strength, rather than too
little.
As to floor covering, I have already noted my preference
for rubber sheeting. Lengths six to eight feet, full roll width
(usually 54 inches), make a surface with a good feel, and fa-
cilitates clean-up afterward: just pick them up and take them
into the yard to be hosed down, or scrub them right on the
floor. Rubber or vinyl makes a good surface for a table or
rack, and is better than leather, taking more abuse without
damage, and is cheaper to replace. Black rubber sheeting
has become quite expensive because it has to be imported,
usually from Belgium. I would avoid using the more commonly
available metal-impregnated rubber sold for radiological use.
The surface sheds bits of metal salts, and (if relevant) it can
conduct electricity.
Soundproofing is a question many guys have to consider.
Remember that a porous surface will absorb more sound than
a slick one. Cellotex is good, cheap material to use on walls
and ceilings. It has no odor and can be painted easily. Wood
or press-board will reflect more sound. Sheet cork will do the
job, but there is an odor to it unless you seal it very carefully.
Walls can be draped with various types of material. Acoustical
tile is made to soundproof ceilings, but can also be applied
to walls. Most materials that insulate for heat will also obstruct
sound. While you are at it, don't forget to cover the doors
199
as well as the walls, and be sure to do something about the
floor.
Many people involved in SM do not have a great deal of
room to set up a proper play area. I have seen various ingen-
ious solutions to space limitations . . . tables that convert into
racks, ornamental fixtures which can be removed to reveal
hooks or eyelets for suspension devices, closets which open
to reveal the basics of a dungeon hanging on the walls and
inside the door. Simply equipping a bed with chains at the
four corners can provide a functional rack. (I had a friend who
did this, and when his cleaning lady discovered them, and
was about to quit as a result, he convinced her they were
"earthquake chains," intended to hold the bed in place dur-
ing an emergency.)
In short, the setting for your scene is a consideration you
must make within the limits of your space; but with enough
attention to detail and serious effort, it is possible to create
the microcosmic world you seek in almost any circumstances.
The real point of this chapter was to make you stop and think,
rather that to offer any step-by-step solution. That is really
all it takes, because the real scene is in your own head, and
the head of your partner. If the setting you create can bring
this to fruition, you have created the atmosphere for a suc-
cessful exchange.

200
CHAPTER NINE— The Castration Complex,
Real and Symbolic
If you were to make a survey of the unconscious fears
shared by the entire population of human males, you would
find the fear of castration among the highest, both in strength
and frequency. Because the male genitals hang outside the
body, they are most vulnerable to attack and damage (the
overt fear) and to actual loss (covert, or subconscious fear).
Most of us are sophisticated enough to know, regardless of
our Freudian anxieties, that the chance of actually losing our
balls is fairly remote, so manifest no open concern. The ma-
jority ofSM guys tend to sublimate this primordial anxiety
into other, symbolic areas. This list should probably start with
cock and ball harnesses (because of their frequency of use),
then the numerous ball stretchers and spreaders. As so many
other psychological phobias (fears) are turned inside-out in
our games, so it is with the castration anxiety. When the Top
stretches the M's balls, he is in effect threatening him with
castration. Or when the M does it to himself in a JO session
he is playing along the edge of danger— much as a sports
car driver flirts with death in his high speed slalom.

201
 For a minority of SM guys, however, the fear of castration
may take the inverse form of actually wanting it done— to him-
self or someone else. This may be largely fantasy, but the
fantasy is strong enough for those who share it that I want
to digress from the mainstream just long enough to take a
look at it. For the guy with these drives, the interest is almost
obsessive, sometimes actually culminating in his having it
done to himself. There are also quite a few guys running
around with one nut, because the other was removed in a
heavy scene. There are a few "mad doctors" around who
will do this sort of thing. I described in the original Handbook,
chapter on The Sublime to the Ultimate, a scene where an
M's testicles were cut off, placed in his mouth for a short pe-
riod of time, then replaced. Many people have written to me
about this account, some questioning its feasibility, others
saying they have participated in or witnessed a similar
session.
One of the most literate communications I received implied
a castration drive that probably epitomizes the whole com-
plex. Although purporting to be a true account, I took it to
be a heavy JO fantasy, and treated it as such in my reply.
(In addition to a personal answer, I responded to it in my
Drummer column):
I have followed your writing for some time now, though
only recently have I been ordering from you directly. I
know of your education and knowledge in the field. I am
a very strong personality, and I enjoy my sex life as it
comes to me. I enjoy both women and men my age or
younger. I have come into a strange situation.
I tend to be very strong and dominant with my partners,
but I will give as well as take if I feel like it. I have a sixteen-
year-old stud working for me, who looks up to me like
a father. He has a body that won't quit, and he is after
mine. I have already had him through some rough ses-
sions, and he keeps coming back for more. I give him
some tough workouts with wrapping his nuts with leather,
and cock stretching— which he loves. I liked nut-stretch-
ing myself, when I was his age, so I know how he feels.
Last summer when we were out castrating cattle, he
202
helped, and we had a fine day and night together. I let
him cut one of the older animals, and he bet me that
young bull's nuts were bigger than mine. They weren't,
and I tied him to the side of the pen and let him play with
me before I fucked his face. He grabbed one of my nuts
and tried to crush it, but I was castrated years ago, and
it doesn't hurt me because my big nuts are fake. He kept
saying that he wished he had nuts like mine, even after
finding out that they are oversized fakes. When I offered
to castrate him, he begged me to do it. I got as far as snap-
ping on a castrating band, and leaving it on as I fucked
him. The next step would have been to cut off his nuts
and bag, but I wasn't sure he wanted it so I cut the band
instead.
Since then, he has been after me to castrate him so that
he can be just like me. One night I came out of the shower
to find him spread out on my bed, his crotch bag shaved,
and the loaded band castrator and knife spread on a towel
between his legs.
I really want to do it, and I think he wants me to do it
personally. But I want him to have a pair of fakes, maybe
even bigger than mine, filling his bag. I contacted the doc-
tor who made and installed my fakes, and he says that
he will do the replacements, but I am still not sure that
this young stud knows all that he should. I have a big cock
which is bigger and better than John Holmes', because
I can get mine to stand, and this kid can manage a little
over twelve inches if I tie a thong around the base. But
his nuts really are small. I think a big pair would make
him look perfect. I am willing to do it; but I don't know
what to look for, to make sure he really wants it.
I was castrated by force, and I was able to handle It.
I still am not willing to make him a eunuch unless I am
sure that he is really willing. I caught him walking funny,
and depantsed him to find that he had put on a castrating
band, himself, before he bound and separated his bag,
as I like him to do under his tight jeans so he shows off
better when we are together.
I hope he won't do it to himself, because I want him
203
to have a bag to put some big fakes into. I want to be sure
his cock is finished growing. If castrated too young, a guy
can lose his male characteristics. As I said, I was older
when I had my nuts cut out, but I haven't really suffered,
except I won't have any more children.
I would like any information you might be able to give
me. He will be 17 soon, but I want to wait until he is 18,
maybe for his 18th birthday, to do the cutting. Meanwhile,
I want to give him some options on methods and such,
so that he can make a decision on how he wants it done.
I hope you will be able to offer some help.
All I could ethically reply was that I assumed his letter to
be a JO fantasy, but on the off-chance it was not, I could only
urge him most strongly not to do it. Obviously, some parts
of his letter do not ring true; but there will undoubtedly be
guys writing to tell me of their experiences, and asserting it
can be (and probably is) completely true.
As my survey results indicate (last chapter), the interest
in actual castration is definitely limited; but symbolic castra-
tion is very big, manifesting itself (in addition to the ball
stretching-spreading) in an number of activities, including:
bodily mutilation (penis spreading), some forms of humilia-
tion, cock and ball torture/whipping, and genital shaving.
We have already covered most aspects of cock and ball
restraint— spreading, stretching, wrapping, etc. Humiliation,
except for its psychological aspects in relation to castration,
has also been discussed. As a head trip, the deprivation of
masculinity can be simulated and acted out in any number
of forms. One of the most common is to force the M to wear
female undergarments, then rip them off at the appropriate
time. The fantasy of being raped by another man is a type
of simulated castration, since it implies a female (hence emas-
culated) role. However, the fantasies and subconscious moti-
vations for wanting to be fucked are so complex and so varied,
I do not want to emphasize it very heavily in this context.
Mutilation of the penis is something I have run into much
more frequently in the last couple of years: opening the
urethra under the cockhead, and forcing it to heal in an open
position. This tends to expose certain nerves that are other-
204
wise shielded by the flesh around the head of one's dick. A
few guys have made deeper cuts, and exposed even more
of the canal (penile meatus). The claim is that this can replace
some of the sensation lost due to circumcision, although two
of the guys I have met were uncircumcised. There is not much
I can (or want) to say about this practice, other than to note
that it happens, and that it is a fairly common practice among
several savage tribes. I do not recommend that you go after
your dick with an Exacto-knife. If you want to do something
in this line, see the chapter on permanent piercings (Bodily
Adornments).
There is no denying the sexual thrill it gives an M to be
bound, have his balls put into a deep distension via a ball
stretcher, then to be secured to some solid obj*,Jt by his balls,
while the Top goes to work on him. You will also find a vari-
ety of penis whips in your local toy shop. Although we nor-
mally think of castration as removing the balls, this is actual-
ly symbolic to a "real" or "complete" castration, which would
imply removal of the penis, as well. (In fact, all of Freud's
theories are based on anxiety over loss of the cock.) So
thoroughly are these fears and their attendant rituals inter-
twined into our spectrum of SM activities, it would be
repetitious to go into them again. Instead, I would like to delve
into the virgin subject I have left for this chapter, namely
genital shaving.
Although it is rare to have a scene where the entire body
is shaved, genital shaving is probably the most popularly fan-
tasized form of the pure, unadulterated castration symbolism.
Many guys do it to themselves, and keep their genital area
free of hair. When accomplished in a ritualistic setting; i.e.,
when done to an M by his Master in the course of a sexual
exchange, it becomes a two-sided surrogate for the actual
act of emasculation. The psychology involved is not so ob-
scure as to require more of a Freudian analysis than already
given, but let me point out some of the more salient and ob-
vious elements of this symbolism.
The development of hair on a youth's groin marks his pro-
gression from the status of "boy" to "man." It accompanies
the enlarging of the penis, the deepening of the voice, and
all the other physical and emotional changes that constitute
the process of puberty. The hirsute growth has tremendous
significance to the maturing individual. The old cliche: "You
make your own decision; you've got hair on your balls" (or
205
some variation thereof) is a standard in our linguistic idiom.
Removing hair from a man's genitals, therefore, becomes tan-
tamount toremoving his badge of manhood. Because it does
no permanent harm, and because the process itself is warm
and sensual with all that hot water and foamy lather, it is done
fairly often. To many, it is an integral part of their scene.
Many M's keep their genitals shaved; they do it as regularly
as they shave their faces. Although I have postulated this as
potentially an act of humiliation, it could easily be calculated
as a "turn on" for their actual or potential Masters. When
one of these denuded slaves drops his jeans in the presence
of his Topman-for-the-evening he is, in effect, proclaiming
himself to be a man of lesser status than his mentor. It helps
to set the tone for them, for both of them, and the unexpected
sight may elicit a quicker or more profound response from
the Master. (It will certainly facilitate the fitting of cock har-
ness, ball stretcher, etc.) Interestingly enough, in most cases
where I have encountered an M who does this, the guy has
been quite well endowed. While I am sure this condition is
not universal, I do suspect a certain number of these self-
denuded slaves to be saying, in effect: "See, my big cock
is really not a Master's cock, after all."
Just how widespread the practice has become is difficult
to say. There are a number of inhibiting factors: the M goes
to a gym, has a lover, etc. In short, we return to the old prob-
lem of the guy who wants to be a slave in the privacy of the
sexual arena, but fears to have his status proclaimed else-
where, and in many instances the shaving becomes merely
a fantasy. The tremendous fascination with the subject is wit-
nessed bythe heavy sales of private publications that depict
and/or describe it.
Less common than shaving the cock and balls is the re-
moval of hair from the slave's buttocks. I know one S who
demands it, but is more inclined to use a depilatory than a
razor. I have known him to insist that the M remove the hair
from his thighs as well— all with a ladies' creme product. The
emotional basis of this really escapes me. Most of these
feminine products have an unpleasant, decidedly "unsexy"
odor. He requires the M to do the job on himself, taking a
206
shower afterward to wash away the residue. But as "they"
say, "one man's meat. . . " (or is it Neet?)
Few people into shaving entered my own experience until
the last three or four years, from which I deduce that the prac-
tice ismore popular than it used to be, but with no empirical
statistics available it is difficult to say. At any rate, I offer a
few comments in case you are thinking about experimenting.
First, you are dealing with the most prized area of a man's
body, and it therefore behooves the shaver to use the greatest
caution. Although the fear inspired by a straight razor might
appeal, I suggest using a regular safety type until you have
learned to shave a balloon without breaking it. Even a safety
razor is going to cause a few spots of blood, because it is
almost impossible to shave the base of the cock and the scro-
tum without nicking some pores around the hair follicles. For
this reason, I always keep an astringent on hand— alcohol,
if nothing else. It stings, but isn't that the name of the game?
Definitely not advised is one of the new double-blade type
of injector razors. For the long hairs above the genitals, it sim-
ply will not do the job. Even with a standard blade, you may
find it necessary to use a pair of shears to cut the fur down
close to the skin before the razor will render an effective trim.
If you can find them, the "prep razors" used in hospitals will
do a fine job without the need for shears, but you may want
to go over the area a second time after this "dry shave," in
order to make it really "smooth as a baby's ass." Some guys
swear by electric dog clippers, which work well but lack the
impact of a razor. Somehow, the buzzing is not an adequate
replacement for the "scritch-scratch" of a blade. Omitting
the final shaving-soap-with-warm-water ending is leaving out
the most sensual part from the M's standpoint.
The M, of course, is going to remember you for a long time,
as the itching strikes him at all hours of the day and night.
But that's nice, too, I think. He is certainly less apt to get up-
pity with you the next time around.
Since the aspect of humiliation is a strong element, yet
more difficult to comprehend than the straight relationship
between castration itself and the symbolic act of shaving a
guy's crotch, I would like to recount an interesting encounter
which illustrates the point very poignantly:
207
 I met him at Griff 's... midweek, because I was there to
attend a Scorpio birthday party, thrown by the manage-
ment for all of us who were born under the sign of the
genitalia. I had noticed him early on, and had been im-
mediately aware of his condition: drunk, certainly, and
probably a little more. I had watched him before they
poured the champagne and passed out the souvenir but-
tons: The guy had the look of a hustler, but he was some-
what past his prime. And Griff's was not a hustler bar.
Last year's trade, I thought. He sat on some beer cases
near the pool table, swaying to the music and returning
my gaze with a silly, crooked smile. When I came close
enough he touched me with his boot, fixed me with steel
grey eyes. His hair was full and curly, probably red in his
early youth... now a darker brown; and his brows were
almost bushy above the deep-set, penetrating eyes. His
features were even, but craggy. His body still seemed
fairly solid; I guessed his height as a bit less than mine-
five foot ten or so.
"You like it wild," he said. It was a statement, fol-
lowed by another disarming grin and an additional tap
with the toe of his brown cowboy boot against my leather
pants.
I nodded, keeping my own features expressionless. I
wanted to smile back at him, but I felt I'd sensed his game,
and this intuition later proved correct. Over the unusu-
ally short span of time before leaving the bar with him,
I discovered: 1 .) his name was Mickey, 2.) he had served
an eight-year hitch in the Navy, 3.) he now drove a semi
for a living, and 4.) he had been drinking since early in
the day, but somewhere along the path to our present en-
counter he had snorted some coke. When he stood to fol-
low me, I watched apprehensively, ready to rescind the
invitation if he seemed too far gone. He was reasonably
steady on his feet, however, and his speech remained
coherent— bubbling and effusive, tinted with a hint of ag-
gressiveness and buried beneath this... hostility? ...I
seemed to sense this, but I was able to persuade him,
with no substantial argument, to ride with me instead of
following me in his own car.
203
 His first sign of uncertainty appeared when I took him
into the blackroom. At this point his effervescent dialogue
trailed off. His eyes roved the collection of equipment
hanging on the walls, and his tongue flicked across his
lips. He sat on a stool and looked up at me, big hands
pressing down on his thighs, well-muscled arms flexing
from the effort. I had kissed him at the threshold, and I
proceeded to do this again, running my hands over his
back and as much of his ass as I could reach, gently re-
assuring him. He was wearing a leather jacket and T-shirt,
which I removed with his cooperation. I unbuttoned his
jeans, and he lifted to permit the cloth to slip free of his
backside.
I now had all of his essential parts displayed before me:
a well-defined torso, a midsection somewhat softened
with the years, narrow hips and firm thighs. His cock,
which had previously flopped heavily against the inside
of his jeans, now lay loosely atop his balls on the black
wooden stool. It was one of those dicks with exceptionally
thick skin... so loose I was not certain at first whether he
was circumcised. (He was, but with some foreskin remain-
ing.) While the cock, itself, was formidable, I was most
intrigued by the balls. Big cocks come along with fair
regularity, but balls like these were rare, indeed! They
were heavy on the palm of my hand when I lifted them,
the long sac permitting me to twist them easily, making
more than a full circle before he winced and sucked his
breath.
I knew to go slowly through these early states, and be-
tween hits of nitrite I fastened a double ball stretcher
around his nuts, snapping it with some difficulty because
of his girth, but finding I could have used a third exten-
sion to fill the exceptional span between balls and upper
terminus. He had offered no resistance thus far, but I
expected he might if I tried to secure him too quickly. For-
saking the metal restraints which would probably have
alarmed him, I selected a pair of leather wrist bands.
Making sure he continued to inhale the nitrite, speaking
to him softly and reassuringly all the while, I buckled the
leather cuffs about his wrists.
209
 The booze and coke were beginning to affect him more
strongly, deadening his responses as I eased him onto
his feet and walked him into position directly beneath the
ceiling chain. This was fastened to heavy-duty hooks, set
into the two opposing walls. The center of the chain was
further supported by a clip attached to a cast-iron ring
in the rafters directly above his head. A pair of padlocks
hung from the links, some twenty inches to either side.
Gingerly, I stretched up first one arm, then the other, ex-
pecting he might jerk free of my grasp when he realized
my intent. But he remained docile through it all, allow-
ing me too lock him firmly in place. (He later admitted that
this was the type of action he had been seeking when he
went to a leatherbar, but he had not actually expected
to find it.)
He watched himself in a wall mirror as I worked the high
boots and jeans free of his feet, leaving him to stand in
his fetters, naked except for the leather about his wrists
and balls. So far, he had been completely agreeable to
everything I had done, although he had made sure I under-
sto dwas
I only doing it with his permission. The hostility
had remain concealed, but I knew it was there: the old
hustler's syndrome. I knew that if I could work on this
component of his personality, the whole scene might
prove more interesting. I was still considering these impli-
cations as I hunkered down behind him and secured his
ankles with a set of rigid irons, an antique contraption
I had acquired from England: flat, iron strips, molded on
a forge to provide the necessary pair of circlets, separated
by a half meter of unyielding metal. While he was not an-
chored to the floor, he was so hobbled as to be unable
to move either foot more than a few inches. He certainly
would be unable to kick.
I began now, between hits of amyl, to cause him small
but increasing amounts of pain. I fastened a pair of firm,
hard rubber tipped clamps onto his tits... twisting these
a bit while maintaining a softly spoken monologue to re-
mind him of his total helplessness. When I grasped his
balls and turned them at the same time I worked on one
210
nipple, he finally broke his complacent acquiescence.
Grasping the chain in both hands, he strained against it,
yanked several times. Through gritted teeth he boasted
of his ability to pull the hooks loose from the wall, I
laughed at Mm, gave him another hit from the inhaler, and
tapped his ass with a belt. "Better men than you have
tried to yank those loose," I told him.
This stimulated him to greater effort, and for a moment
my insult to his masculinity caused an important rage to
boil out of him. In a frenzy, he tugged at his bonds, twist-
ing his body from side to side, the struggle forcing his
muscles to tighten into a pattern of pure, unrestrained
strength, like Michelangelo's slaves trying to burst free
of the rock from which they were only partially formed.
I had slipped out of my clothes, then, replacing only the
boots and a leather vest. I pressed against the front of
his straining form, grasped a handful of hair and forced
his head backward. With my lips no more than a couple
of inches from his I whispered to him, telling him he was
okay, not to fight it, that I owned him until I chose to let
him go.
"Nobody owns me," he returned; but his low tone
matched my own, and his attitude carried little conviction.
I stroked him, alternating the warm soothing contact
of my palms with an ever more painful turn at his tit
clamps or his balls. His cock remained heavy and bloated,
but it had never gotten hard. I snapped it with my finger,
taunting him about his impotence. This angered him
again, but the booze and drugs worked against him. He
was helpless to make the display of manhood he so
desperately needed. It irked him, I think, more than any
other aspect of his restraint. "If you can't get that thing
up," I continued, "I'll just have to shave it."
"If you do that, you'd better kill me," he shouted.
"Once you turn me loose..."
I took the belt again, and I worked him harder than
before. I knew I hurt him, but his macho pride would not
let him admit it. "You think you're man enough to take
anything I can give you. That's right, isn't it?" I de-
211
manded, letting him have a couple of solid blows across
the ass.
"That's right, bastard!" he answered, but he was twist-
ing to avoid my strokes. At an earlier stage in my leather
career I might have tried to force the "yes, sir-no, sir"
routine on him, but I had a more effective plan in mind.
He might continue to fight me in the verbal contest, and
if I couldn't force him to say it he would have won. But
if I forced on him something he could do nothing about...
I was behind him at this point, and he was suspended
to face the back wall of my dungeon. I took a plastic bowl
from the chest of toys and slipped out of the room, return-
ing afew moments later with the vessel half full of warm
water. I placed this on the floor in front of him, then began
to unsnap the ball stretcher. I watched him silently. He
yanked a couple of times on the chain, but otherwise
made no response. His cock still hung flaccid and full,
his balls rising slightly when the sheath was removed. I
had the bowl against the apex of his legs, allowing his
genitals to hang over the lip while I splashed water against
them, soaking the area from the top of his pubic hair. I
could hear him draw breath sharply through gritted teeth,
and when I glanced up at him his steely eyes were riveted
upon me, almost in hatred. I laughed at him again, and
shot a bolt of foam from the spray can onto his badge
of manhood.
The ankle irons forced his legs to remain slightly
spread, and I worked the lather into his hairs, over the
length of his cock and balls, between his thighs. As I
touched his dick I could feel a greater tumescence, a sug-
gestion of hardness as it now projected ever so slightly
outward from his groin. "He doesn't mind it," I re-
marked, pulling down on the cock. I settled onto the stool
which he had occupied earlier, and using a new single-
edge razor, I slowly began to shave him. I stripped the
upper patch first, making sure to keep it well soaked with
warm water, using much more than was necessary. I took
several passes, as the hairs collapsed to form an almost
impenetrable shield. Had the growth been much thicker,
I would have needed to clip it first.
212
 He was groaning, sighing, and his cock was definitely
lengthening, beginning to stand farther out from his body.
I shaved this next, gingerly scraping away the furry cover-
ing at its base, feeling the rubbery tension increase as
I manipulated the slippery mass with my fingers. He went
through another spasm of twisting and hauling on the
chains, but he had sensed his own helplessness, and I
maintained a running, one-sided conversation to empha-
size his condition.
Finally I took his balls into my hands, feeling them slide
away as he writhed to free himself from my grasp. I
cautioned him to hold still, reminding him of the conse-
quences should the razor slip. I stretched the skin and
gently ran the blade along the sides, the back, and finally
the front, scraping off every vestige of coarse brown pelt.
He had ceased to threaten me, his struggles gradually
subsiding. His cock was standing at full attention when
I sloshed away the remainder of the creme. I dried him
as best I could with a towel, then stood back to admire
my handiwork. His naked groin gleamed in the feeble
light, still damp despite my efforts. When I turned my gaze
up toward his face, I found him sagging in his bonds, head
drooping forward, his entire posture an acknowledgment
of defeat. His body was bathed in sweat, his fingers still
hanging onto the chain. But the white-knuckled grasp had
given way to a clinging lassitude. Only his cock displayed
residual strength, soaring rigidly above his denuded loins.
I stepped behind him, testing the cheeks of his ass with
my warm, moist hands. "Maybe I should shave this, too,"
I suggested softly.
I was several moments before he answered. He never
moved, never lifted his head, but he muttered finally, and
I had to lean close to his lips to hear it. "Maybe you
should, bastard," he whispered hoarsely. "There's not
a fucking thing I can do about it. Maybe you should..."
213
CHAPTER TEN— The Advanced
Specialties, Group I
This chapter deals with imprisonment and related subjects.
If catheters and the more exotic dungeon equipment do not
seem to fit this category, try to follow my logic and you will
see why I have included them here. I want to acknowledge
the help received from GMSMA (Gay Male SM Activists) in
New York and from DungeonMaster. However, I have
deviated quite widely from, and gone somewhat beyond, the
information supplied by these worthy sources, so if you
disagree, argue with me, not with them. Since much of our
discussion here is going to involve the use of psychology in
a scene, my conclusions will be somewhat subjective, un-
scientific inmany cases, certainly reflective of my own ex-
periences and observations.
To set the scene, so to speak, let us take a moment to con-
sider the ramifications of a general long-term captivity
situation— not necessarily having anything to do with SM. Dur-
ing the 70's there was widespread recognition within the
psychological community of a factor called the "Stockholm
Syndrome," referring to a hostage situation wherein a group
of robbers held bank employees hostage for several days

214
(similar to the situation in Dog Day Afternoon). During the
course of their captivity, the hostages developed tremendous
emotional ties with their captors, and, to a lesser extent, so
did the robbers with their prisoners. In general, this situation
is seen to progress through three different stages: develop-
ment of interest and positive feelings toward the captor(s),
development of negative feelings toward the potential res-
cuers, and eventually a feeling of "togetherness" resulting
from the increased isolation, which even produces positive
feelings on the part of the captors toward their hostages. (In-
terestingly enough, this Stockholm Syndrome did not seem
to occur with the hostages in Iran, so I conclude that certain
conditions are necessary for its development. Following re-
lease, one military type was asked if he ever wanted to return
to Teheran, and his reply was: "Only in a B-52.")
Inducing positive feelings in a captive is what the Top
should be striving for in a long-term bondage situation. You
want the M to respond to you in a sincerely supplicating man-
ner. Ifyou handle the situation properly— assuming we have
the right pair of personalities to start with— the result should
be to reinforce and/or greatly increase whatever positive emo-
tional bonds already exist.
It is interesting to note that when investigators of child
abuse are uncertain which parent is guilty of the actual mis-
treatment, one almost foolproof test is to question the child
at length, without any real expectation of obtaining an answer.
In 99 percent of the cases, the abused child will run to the
parent who has been guilty of the abuse, once released by
his inquisitors. The younger and less sophisticated the child,
the more likely this is to happen.
It is a simple and fairly consistent dynamic of human be-
havior that the supplicant will seek succor from his tormen-
tor. This is the condition you are going to produce if you han-
dle your long-term bondage scene correctly. As a part of this,
or even independent of a long-term game, the use of certain
equipment is intended to produce a similar effect... specifically
those devices which render the M completely powerless to
exercise normal control over his body or his senses. This is
my rationale for including catheters and other equipment in
215
this section. A bound and naked man who cannot even ex-
ert control over his urination is very much a total prisoner.
This, and various other forms of complete and exotic restraint,
can produce the supplicating effect, skirting the edges of a
Master-slave relationship, even within a time frame that would
otherwise make it impossible. In other words, this is one way
to deepen the emotional— hence the physical— content of an
otherwise more superficial SM session.

Long term bondage. This scene is recommended for the

more advanced SM'er, because the Top should be experi-
enced enough in dealing with his M to empathize with his
responses, and to recognize the psychological content of his
own and his supplicant's reactions. The M should be well be-
yond the "freaking out" stage, so that whatever fear may be
engendered by his Top will not paralyze him, or so panic him
that he breaks. It is also better if the time frame is uncertain;
i.e., the M does not know how long it is going to last, or pos-
sibly whether it is going to end at all. Such uncertainty is a
major tool in producing the desired effect.
By long-term bondage, I mean a situation lasting at least
24 hours, that may extend over several days, even weeks.
Understandably, few people can participate in a game this
long, but, with skill, the basic effects, or the rudiments of the
basic effects, can be produced within the shorter time span.
In a condensed scenario, the M is left with the impression
that his Master may be planning to extend the time much fur-
ther, with or without his consent. In fact, the M's awareness
of an impending cutoff can be used to the Top's advantage:
release in time for the M to reach his place of employment,
or whatever other circumstances require a termination of the
scene, is the projected reward for the desired behavior.
To avoid any misunderstanding, let me backtrack a mo-
ment to try to define exactly the type of response we are seek-
ing to produce— primarily in the M, but also in the S. For
openers, we have a pair of guys sufficiently mutually attracted
to have gone into an SM scene together. Preferably, they
have made it together before, being familiar enough to allow
each participant to predict to some extent the mode in which
216
the other normally functions. For the Top, this allows him to
understand and better manipulate the bottom. The M, on the
other hand, is more vulnerable, because he has come to ex-
pect a specific type of treatment from his Master, and in these
circumstances the Top's behavior may be deliberately al-
tered. Whatever faith the M originally had in this particular
Top's method of operation should and probably will be shaken
by the psychological atmosphere to be created. It will become
a one-way street, a no-backing-out-once-it's-started game,
in the course of which the M is going to be forced to con-
cede that his every physical response, including his even-
tual freedom, is dependent upon the whim of his captor. It
thus becomes a true submission, not simply role-playing as
in a short-term exchange. Only by coming to his Master as
a complete supplicant will he be allowed anything: water,
food, a change in room temperature, alteration of an uncom-
fortable binding, a chance to eliminate, etc.
If the Top has worked a number of times with this particular
M, he should unexpectedly alter his pattern. If he is usually
very verbal, he should keep quiet, or vice versa. If it is impos-
sible to conduct the long-term bondage in a different loca-
tion from the usual scene, it is a good idea to blindfold the
M and eliminate any extraneous sounds. Use a different
musical background; change the normal patterns of touch.
Make the M feel as isolated as possible from the rest of the
world. In a situation planned to last several days, make the
timing of food and drink irregular and illogical— maybe two
or three breakfasts in a row, deprivation of water, or water
given only as a reward for the M*s performing an act he nor-
mally wouldn't do. The most important factor to establish is
that everything comes from the Master, and only from the
Master. If a catheter is used, it should have a shut-off valve
so that the M's bladder can be voided only at the Master's
pleasure.
The net result of this will be a sense of total dependency,
with a high probability that elements of the Stockholm Syn-
drome will manifest themselves. Although the M may well per-
ceive the S as his abuser— and may even go through a period
of hostility and defiance— he will gradually come to a point
217
where he submits. Even if he has been a willing supplicant
in the past, his present response will be more complete and
his feeling toward the Top should be almost reverence or (per-
ceived as) love. Once he responds this way, there will prob-
ably be a reciprocal return of emotion on the part of the S.
Depending on the two men involved, there may or may not
be a great deal of abuse or other physical interaction. This
is something the Top will have to decide, and should plan
ahead of time, with several alternative methods of handling
his subject, depending on the behavior engendered by the
long-term bondge. Once he has done this a number of times,
especially with a variety of partners, the Top will discover just
how diverse the response of the M at various stages in his
imprisonment can be. But he may also be surprised by the
consistency of the end result.
Due to the diversity of personalities and the physical situa-
tions available to different people, it is impossible to set any
firm rules as to exactly how the bondage should be done,
or precisely which forms of punishment are appropriate. I
would suggest that nothing be done to the M that will require
his removal from the desired setting; and that, whatever his
specific bondage, it be accomplished with careful attention
to the normal parameters: not distractingly uncomfortable,
not restrictive to circulation, respiration, or neural systems,
etc. The only set rule I would suggest is for the Top to make
every decision, with no possibility permitted for the M to make
suggestions or to manipulate his condition in any way, other
than by complete obedience and receipt of his promised
rewards.

The Cage. As a part of the long-term bondage situation,

the use of a cage or cell may be desirable. A cell is generally
a room large enough to permit the prisoner to stand up and
move at least a few paces; a cage is a smaller area, one
where the captive may be forced to sit or lie down. He may
have to squat, or to bend in an awkward position. To pro-
duce the desired effects, a cage is probably not the best
imprisonment device to use for the entire time, but it can be
reserved for punishment or otherwise utilized for a portion
218
of the scenario. The cell may have bars or be made of heavy
wire mesh, or may be the black room itself, simply with the
M restrained in such a way as to prohibit his escape. The
cage is often made of wood and wire mesh, but is definitely
the major restraint, in and of itself.
Men are frequently locked into cells, but generally only ani-
mals are confined in cages. The psychological ramifications
of either condition are manifold, and should certainly be
pointed out to the prisoner. In conjunction with the cage, it
is not uncommon to utilize a dog bowl for food and water,
or a leash in moving the prisoner in and out.
If you can afford them, many types of cells and cages are
commercially available. Firms that make anti-burglar bars for
windows have all manner of wonderful designs, easily adapt-
able to your particular needs. There are also many animal
cages on the market, including those used to transport and
confine large dogs on the way to and during a show. When-
ever an old police station is being torn down, it is amazing
how fierce the competition can be for the dismantled cell
doors and bars. I wonder why...?

Mummification. Wrapping the total body to completely im-

mobilize the M is another interesting activity, one which will
create as total a condition of helplessness as it is possible
to obtain, and if done properly can be left in place for several
hours. Simply because of the work involved, you are going
to want a fairly wide material. An Ace bandage, probably wider
than the one you might use for cock wrapping, is a good
starter, although there are more exotic materials available.
I have found coils of plastic in surplus stores, very smooth
surfaces in widths of four to six inches. I do not know what
they were originally intended to be, but they are fine for mum-
mification. You can also use Saran Wrap, which is particularly
satisfactory, being both transparent and very wide to cut down
the wrapping time and effort. It also sticks to itself, thus elimi-
nating the need for fasteners. Naturally, the less porous the
material, the greater will be the sensation of heat the M is
going to feel and the shorter the time his bindings can be
maintained.
219
 Knowing how inventive my readers can be, I will not go into
detailed specifics for each material, nor try to list all the pos-
sibilities. However, the basic technique should concern itself
with immobilization. It is best to have the M completely
stretched out, naked, with his arms above his head. Writing
in DungeonMaster, Fledermaus suggests starting with the
body in a vertical position, hands raised and secured to the
ceiling. He uses Ace bandages, in rolls of three- to six-inch
widths. Starting at the upper torso, the wrappings are applied
in a continuous, overlapping progression down the body. As
you reach the end of a roll, secure it with the fasteners pro-
vided bythe manufacturer, and keep on going as low as the
mid to upper thighs. Leave the cock and balls free, since you
may want to do something with them during the course of
using your "King Tut."
This is a good time to lower the M, since he can still move
his feet and arms to help himself from falling. Place him hori-
zontally on his back and wrap his hands together, palm to
palm, then proceed down the arms until you reach the original
wrappings. The reason for having the arms upraised, rather
than in the more conventional Egyptian posture down the
sides of the body or crossed on the chest, is the greater re-
straint achieved by keeping them separate. It is important to
encase the fingers to keep them completely immobilized.
Naturally, leave the nostrils exposed, but you might want to
gag him before covering the mouth. You can now complete
the wrapping of the lower legs and feet, until he is completely
encased.
You now have the mummy, with his nose and his cock and
balls exposed. (If you have set tit clamps as well, do a "cross
your heart" wrap to keep the bindings from sliding over onto
the clamps.) Your M will be feeling the pressure of bondage
as never before, and his groans should keep you entertained
for hours! If you prefer to cover the nostrils, a piss gag in the
mouth will ensure that he can breathe. Once you have tried
it a few times, I am sure you will come up with any number
of possible variations. Just remember that the guy has to
breathe, and the less porous bindings will make him sweat.
You don't want him to drown in it! The use you make of his
220
totally immobilized body can provide an exciting experience
for both of you.

Straitjackets. In keeping with the same sense of complete

immobility, the straitjacket has certain advantages in that it
is fully constructed for you, and needs only to be put on ac-
cording tothe manufacturer's instructions. Of course, it will
only confine the arms and upper torso, so you might want
to use it in conjunction with other restraints. There is also
a certain excitement to be derived from the knowledge that
straitjackets are normally used to subdue unruly prisoners
in various institutions. The regular canvas varieties are effi-
cient and cheaper than the more exotic types, although there
is a wonderful leather model available from Fetters (New York
or London).
In some ways, I have found a straitjacket to provide more
opportunities for play than a complete body wrapping, be-
cause itleaves the butt, genital area, and legs exposed. A
man who is otherwise naked, gagged, and laced tightly into
a straitjacket, can provide his Master with limitless oppor-
tunities for punishment and abuse. Because there is little
need to be concerned with time limits, this is a first-rate device
for long-term imprisonment. I do not know of anyone other
than an experienced tailor being able to make his own strait-
jacket, so this is probably one case where you are going to
be forced to spend the money if you want to play the game.
But if bondage is your scene, you will find the expenditure
worthwhile.

Miscellaneous erotica. For long-term bondage, and for

generating a sense of complete captivity, there is nothing bet-
ter than metal shackles and chains. Whereas the heavy fetish
is for leather, these more solid bindings are even better to
fulfill the fantasy in this particular setting. They conjure up
images of prisoners in the cells of the inquisition, or slave
laborers in South Africa... galley slaves, or barbarians cap-
tured by the Roman legions... sailors or Marines in military
brigs... Whatever your imagination may picture as the ultimate
bondage situation, it is likely that steel or iron restraints will
help complete the fantasy.
221
 Starting with a set of good handcuffs and a few lengths
of heavy chain, available in any hardware store, you can pro-
gress into the realm of truly exotic replicas, and sometimes
even the real things. Again, I would refer to Fetters as the
best and most reliable source for many of these items, al-
though you may be lucky enough to stumble onto a cache
of genuine articles in surplus outlets (for military hardware)
or junk-antique shops for whatever you may be able to find.
Over the years, there have been many people who collected
these items, either because of their own interest in bondage,
or simply because people will collect anything. (I love the Fet-
ters' disclaimer on all their products, informing the buyer that
"whereas the object left their factory in proper working condi-
tion, they take no responsibility for misadventure." By this,
I presume they mean they will not pay the blacksmith if you
get it on, and can't get it off.) Since most of the items I will
describe below will be best understood if seen in a picture,
and since most are available from Fetters, you might send
a couple of bucks for their illustrated catalogue: 40 Fitzwilliam
Rd., London SW4 ODN. (The address is strictly for mail order.)
Some of the more exciting items I have seen and/or used
include: South African prison irons, which are barrel-lock wrist
and ankle irons, connected by chains. Hyatt handcuffs and
leg restraints, which are either the original or replicas of the
irons used by British police for years. One model is a solid
figure "8," which locks the wrists (or ankles) to each other
with no chain between them. Others have chains like the regu-
lation "darbies," and some have an adjustable (for size) lock-
ing device as used by Scotland Yard. The rigid irons, replicas
of 17th Century ship's irons, for wrists, ankles, or arm Oust
above the elbow), are strips of steel, flat in the middle,
rounded on the ends to accommodate the limb to be inserted.
They hinge on either end, and lock together in the center so
as to hold the wrists or ankles firmly in about a twelve- or
eighteen-inch separation. There is also the iron collar (with
smooth interior or dull prongs) with cuffs attached by chains.
Then there is the head cage, a replica of an item used by
the Spanish Inquisition. It simply closes around the head,
222
locks at the neck, and can be attached by an overhead ring.
It can be supplied with a removable mouthpiece.
Thus, if somebody wants to go into a long-term bondage
game, I really prefer to see him use metal restraints in con-
junction with whatever cage or cell arrangement his situa-
tion allows. A steel manacle can be the ultimate in security,
while loose enough not to cause circulatory problems. It also
creates a sense of total imprisonment, such as nothing else
can achieve, short of mummificaiton or leather bonds so tight
they are unsafe for an extended period. Besides, whoever
heard of a professional slaver marching his charges away
in anything but irons?
There are a number of other exotic devices, that may or
may not actually be used. Just the sight of them hanging on
the blackroom wall can evoke a respectful behavior from the
M, however. These include: branding irons, lifts and pulleys
with hooks, heavy braided bull whips, presses or crushing
devices, etc. Mostly, these items are acquired by chance,
either by browsing in antique shops or swap meets, or in the
course of travel into the hinterlands.
If you are the handyman type, there are a number of de-
vices you might consider making. We have already mentioned
crosses and whipping posts in an earlier chapter, and have
alluded to racks a couple of times without saying much about
them. In essence, these are nothing more than flat, heavy
surfaces, with straps to hold the M in place, and possibly with
holes in strategic locations (by nipples or genitals). Although
the medieval originals were designed to stretch the prisoner,
this is seldom much of a consideration today. However, if you
are striving for this historical realism, it is easy enough to in-
stall an ordinary winch. I have also seen a revolving rack,
constructed with dowels and two-by-fours, that permitted the
M to be rotated on a central fulcrum, for upside-down or
rightside-up action. Stocks are another historical device ap-
pealing to many guys, and are simple enough to build if you
have the tools. They can be made to secure just the wrists,
the head and hands, the ankles, etc. With the head and wrists
anchored at a properly low level, they can force the ass Into
a perfect whipping position. There is also the old Chinese
223
device, the "chang," I think it was called. This is a large
wooden circle that opens down the diameter, with notches
cut out for neck and wrists. Once locked in, the slave can
move about, but his arms are secured and useless.
All these devices are designed to place and keep the M
within the total physical control of the Master. More of a
pyschological imprisonment is achieved by the use of butt
plugs (discussed in the section on dildoes) and catheters. By
asserting this additional element of control, namely the M's
ability to relieve himself, the S banishes the last vestige of
self-assurance, and deals the coup de grace to any remain-
ing cockiness or arrogance. The butt plug makes the asshole,
which to most men is the most private spot of the body, the
Master's property. For many guys, the catheter completes
the impression of total dependence. For others, it is part of
a different, but very erotic game. But it is a game to be played
by very strict and careful rules.

Catheters. In my previous writings, and until very recently

in my mail-order business, I have avoided any association
with catheters, being afraid of encouraging someone to em-
bark on a dangerous adventure. This was valid reasoning a
few years ago, but I am now aware of a great many more
people experimenting with objects introduced into the
penis— some without taking the proper precautions. There
have always been idiots who will shove anything up their dicks
that will fit— pencils, wires, ball-point pens, glass tubes, you
name it! It would be far better if they at least used something
designed for the purpose. I was fortunate enough to be in
New York City when GMSMA held their annual seminar on
catheters, and I want to thank Sy and Tom (of T.A.I.L.) for
adding to my knowledge on this score.
There are two basic dangers to be avoided in using a
catheter, and, keeping these in mind, one can embark on a
number of very sensual experiences. The first danger is from
infection, because the urethra (piss tube) is more or less ster-
ile, once you get past the first few inches of the penis. (One
of my informants suggests that there is little danger in the
first nine or ten inches of the penis, but few are so lucky.)
224
Reasonable care should be taken not to carry potentially
harmful microorganisms into the urinary tract. Recent medical
practice in catheterization has been to rely on "clean tech-
nique" rather than the more exacting "sterile technique," but
it is better to err on the side of safety. We'll go into this in
more detail a bit further on.
The second danger is straining or tearing of the urethral
passage. Common sense should tell you not to shove any-
thing up the dick which has a sharp point. However, many
guys do not stop to think that the urethra bends as it passes
through the prostate gland and on up into the bladder. A
catheter has to be flexible to get there. Although doctors do
use "sounds," which are metal tubes, usually with a hooked
neck on the end, and can get these around the bends, it is
a practice best left to them. You can cause serious damage
by playing with tools you don't know how to use. Neither
should you cut off and use a piece of plastic tubing, or any
other homemade device. Some have rough edges that can
cut; others may not be clean.
Catheters come in a variety of sizes, with numerous tips.
Basically, however, there are two types: those with a plain
end (straight or curved, the latter called a "Coude") and those
with an inflatable portion at the tip to prevent its pulling out
by accident. These are sometimes called "Bardex" tubes,
the name of the best known manufacturer. The proper term
is "Foley" catheter, named, presumably, for its inventor. It
is generally used in hospitals for someone who has to retain
the catheter for longer than the necessary few m nutes to
empty his bladder.
Most present-day catheters are made of latex or plastic,
although there are also glycerine types. In ancient times,
catheters were made of many different materials (such as jade
and ivory in a pre-dynastic China), and catheterization has
been a ritualistic and/or sexual practice for many thousands
of years. One can see records carved in stone in the Maya
ruins of southern Mexico and Guatemala. (No sterile tech-
nique, there, I'd bet! But we don't know how many of the In-
dians and ancient Chinese survived the experience.) There
is also speculation that certain bone artifacts found in
225
collections of paleolithic and neolithic cultures are, in fact,
catheters, although they are classified as hair pins or ascribed
other benign purposes.
How— or if— the ancients survived these usages is un-
answerable. How you can experience the sensation and live
to tell about it is relatively easy. The first requisite is to follow
a clean and/or sterile technique. Catheters are normally sold
in sealed packages, so when you buy them they are already
sterile. The problem is to keep them that way.
First, wash your hands well with soap and hot water, rinse
and wash again. If you have been playing with lubricant,
especially with any anal contact, the washing is especially
important and must be done even more thoroughly. Have
ready a freshly laundered towel, preferably with a hole cut
in the center. With your subject lying on his back, wash his
dick as thoroughly as you washed your hands, drape the towel
over his groin and pull his cock through the hole. You can
use rubber surgical gloves to be especially safe, but these
should be put on with proper precautions not to touch the
sterile portions, even with your well-washed hands. Use an
antiseptic, Betadine (which is expensive) or Zethiran. Then
take your tube of lubricant, squeeze out and discard the first
blob. The next goes on the clean towel, and the first several
inches of the catheter is rolled in it. The tube is inserted into
the penis, and gently (slowly) worked in until it reaches the
point where a flow of urine comes out. With a regular catheter,
stop here. With a Foley catheter, you have to go a bit farther,
in order to ensure the portion with the bulb is well inside the
bladder before it is inflated to hold the tube in place.
As with all new appliances, you are well advised to do all
of this to yourself before trying it on another person. This way
you will know how it feels, and you will be better prepared
for the reactions of your subject. The best of all, of course,
would be to let an experienced person do it to you.
Basically, there is nc-great pain involved in catheterization,
although the novice may be aware of a slight burning sensa-
tion near the end of his dick during insertion, and the same
after the catheter is removed. At this point, he will also ex-
perience a strong urge to urinate, but that is obviously
226
unnecessary, since you have just drained his bladder. If a
person does piss (or ejaculate) within twenty or thirty minutes
after the catheter is removed, he will experience a harsh sting-
ing or burning sensation, because both urine and semen are
acid, and the internal plumbing has just been invaded by a
foreign object. After half an hour or so, the urge to piss will
pass, and the guy should no longer feel much different from
normal if he urinates or cums.
To keep your catheters sterile, they should be washed with
soap and water as soon as possible, and before using them
again they should be boiled in a sealed container, at a roll-
ing boil, for 30 minutes c so— 15 minutes in a pressure
cooker. You can also do it in an oven; 140°F to 180°F for
eight hours; 300 °F for an hour. Since they are already, then,
in a sterile container, leave them in it, sealed, until you are
ready to use them. You can do this 40 to 50 times before the
rubber starts to disintegrate.
Use a water soluble lubricant, like K-Y or Lubrifax. Do not
use Lube or Crisco; this type is not sterile, and if you have
been using it for ass play, you are almost certain to have con-
taminated iwith
t anal bacteria. Wearing a cockring during
catheterization is generally not a problem, unless the ring is
exceptionally tight. The combined inside-outside pressure can
produce a fantastic sensation.
As to the selection of the catheter itself, you must consider
the experience of the subject, the size of his urethral pas-
sage...also, how relaxed he is and how turned on to the pros-
pect. Anumber 12 catheter is about as small as an adult man
would be interested in using, while a number 15 (almost twice
as large) is probably the most commonly used. A very large
catheter (like a number 30) can be a thrill for an experienced
guy, very turned on to the idea, and with a large passage.
The large size, for someone really into this, is more or less
determined by the same idea as the fistfucker being able to
take a larger hand. It is the desire to feel a very large object
being inserted into the body. Until you know what you are
doing, I would strongly advise that you not play with anything
larger than the number 15. These numbers, incidentally, are
given in the most commonly used "French" system, with
three gradations in size equal to one millimeter difference.

227
 Once the catheter is in place, the bladder will begin to drain.
In an SM scene, the Top might want to clamp off the flow
to obtain full control over the time and amount to be voided:
a prime consideration in a long-term bondage game. It is also
possible to use a plastic plunger type syringe, without a nee-
dle, to force some other fluid into the bladder. Whatever you
put in should be sterile (like water that has been boiled); of
a temperature short of scalding or freezing; and in a quan-
tity not to over-expand the bladder. The average guy can
easily take 30 to 40 cc; a very large man might handle up
to 55cc. You do not need to give him this much, however,
since the presence of the catheter and the addition of out-
side fluid will create the desired sensation without trying to
blow him up like a balloon.
It is a favorite trick of some aficionados to first catheterize
the M, then use a small catheter on themselves. The M is
allowed to void himself, then the end of the smaller catheter
is placed into the larger, and the Top fills his M's bladder with
his own piss. The psychological implications can be very ex-
citing, but the technique is not entirely safe. Although urine
is considered sterile, your urine is sterile to you; it is not neces-
sarily sterile to another person. I know this is frequently done,
and I know it is a big charge to both donor and receiver.
Merely a word to the wise! Remember, we are still in a serious
health crisis!
Although you should probably start your catheter experi-
mentation with a plain tip type (whistle, olive, round, etc.) you
will soon discover that it does not stay in place, at exactly
the depth you want it, especially if you play your games for
an extended period of time. The answer is the Foley catheter,
mentioned before. There is no real difference in handling this,
except that you must insert it a bit deeper than the plain tip
varieties. Used thousands of times every day in US hospitals,
it is not particularly dangerous as long as you make sure the
tip is well enough inside the bladder for the balloon to inflate
there, not in the urethral passage. There is a small tube in-
side the catheter to permit the pumping of air or fluid into
the balloon. I strongly suggest the use of air, which has less
chance of carrying bacteria and causing infection should the
228
balloon break inside the body. Air can be supplied easily
through a small bulb hand-pump.
Remove the catheter slowly, and only after making sure
the balloon has been deflated. Some guys are so excited by
the experience they get a roaring hard-on, which can make
removal of the catheter a bit more difficult. A guy may also
be so turned on as to insist on a quick JO as soon as the
tube is out. Remember, this is going to cause the burning
sensation previously mentioned. If you use a sound (the metal
device with a hooked end), never insert it beyond the root
of the dick, and if the subject gets hard from its use, let him
go soft before you try to pull it out. A slight stinging sensa-
tion during urination can last for up to a day or so after a
catheter or sound insertion, but this will vary with the in-
dividual and, of course, the size of the catheter.
Tom of T.A.I.L., lecturing on catheters to the GMSMA
group, emphasized the importance of awareness of the
body's normal state before getting into these games, so if
something does start to go wrong internally, you know at once
that you need medical help. For instance, know your normal
body temperature, which may not be exactly 98.6 °F. Be
aware of the usual condition of both your urine and feces.
Is the urine normally cloudy? Clear? How does the steam
shoot out? How often do you urinate or defecate? What is
your normal urine or stool color? Is there usually an odor to
your urine? A change in any of these conditions, following
a catheterization, FF, and/or enema session, can be an
indication of trouble. Most of the problems develop very quick-
ly, so it is important to have them attended to as soon as you
spot trouble. For instance, the minimum amount of piss a
healthy person expels in a day is a little over a pint (half a
liter). Less can be a sign of infection and kidney failure, result-
ing indehydration of the body. Orange or smoky-colored urine
can mean it contains blood. Brown urine or yellow feces may
indicate hepatitis. Black feces can indicate internal bleeding,
although this can also be caused by an excess of iron or eat-
ing certain foods. The sensation of having to piss after you
have just gone, or trotting in to pee very frequently but voiding
only a small amount each time, can indicate an infection of
229
the bladder. Pus from the penis or mucus from the anus are
also common signs of trouble.
Writing for DungeonMaster, C.B. of Chicago gives us an
interesting variation for the more advanced catheter-oriented
person. He calls it catheterization with ice, although the tech-
nique isnot actually going all the way to the bladder, hence
does not result in an involuntary release of urine. He sug-
gests the use of distilled water (not mineral water) in an
unopened container, paper straws, a metal saucepan,
aluminum foil, paper towels (separated) and a pair of
disposable surgical gloves. The straws, pan and towels are
placed on the foil and heated in the oven (300 °F) for 25
minutes. Holding the edge of the foil, transfer the entire col-
lection tothe freezer and cool them for another 30 minutes.
After the objects have cooled, open the container of distilled
water and put on the gloves (using proper care not to con-
taminate them). Pick up a straw with gloved fingers and dip
into the water, holding your finger over one end so as to pick
up a strawful. Place several of these on a horizontal surface
in the freezer. Repeat with all the straws. The freezer should
be on its lowest setting to ensure a rapid freezing. Once
frozen, the straws can stay there indefinitely, although it is
better to wrap them in one of the towels to prevent
contamination.
Prior to the scene, boil distilled water in the saucepan, allow
it to cool slightly, and pour it evenly down the side of a straw
until the "ice catheter" falls onto one of the sterilized paper
towels. Remove any sharp ends with a little boiling water.
Wrap catheters individually in the paper towels and store in
the freezer until you are ready to use them. Handle them only
with the sterilized paper towels or with gloved hands, and
avoid holding them by the center, as heat from your hand
can melt the ice and distort the shape. Manipulating the ice
inside the urethra, only within the penis— not past the base,
and, until you're used to doing this, not more than two-thirds
of the way up— creates a sensation of "burning cold," and
a feeling of fullness in addition to a sense of having been
brutally violated. As the ice melts there is a sensation very
similar to ejaculation.

230
 C.B. suggests that the Ice not be manipulated up and down
inside the cock for more than a few strokes, as the melting
ice can produce a sharp point. He also recommends using
lots of lubricant— maybe a whole tube of K-Y, which is so
much it has to be worked into the cock prior to catheteriza-
tion (atrip by itself, with a huge glob shooting out during the
eventual ejaculation). The ice catheter should melt completely
in five to ten minutes, and because you are using distilled
water the melting should be fairly even. If the ice catheter
should break during manipulation, hold the penis upright in
your hand, keeping it still and straight until you are certain
the ice has melted.
The idea so appealed to me, I had to give it a try, and found
it a really hot (!) variation, although it did tend to frighten my
subject. I also found the little bits of ice difficult to handle:
they wanted to stick to the towel, and broke very easily. But
the ones that worked, worked well.
The DM article also points up another consideration appli-
cable to any catheterization: in the case of someone who has
had gonorrhea, there is the possibility of small nodules re-
maining about halfway up the urethra. This is a potential
hazard, and you have to be careful not to break them when
inserting the catheter. A safe rule is: whenever you run into
an obstacle, stop; and if necessary abort the scene rather
than take a chance on doing some injury. After all, there are
many other activities you can get into.
I would like to stagger onward, now, into a discussion and
illustration of the complex of human needs that may help tie
all this together, plus some overlap from other chapters. I
think we all recognize a psychological need on the part of
some guys to be imprisoned, or at least confined. In some,
it transcends the desire (or need) to be punished, although
the same person will often have a combination of all these.
When the emotional drive toward confinement is strong, it
is seen in Freudian terms as a "desire to return to the womb,"
and in SM terms as a hot man looking to be tied up, forced,
and finally imprisoned. For such a man, any or all of the rituals
we have explored in this chapter, may be of intense and highly
charged interest... most easily understood on the part of the M.
231
 Explaining the Top's desire to engage in these fairly compli-
cated and exacting procedures may be more difficult. It would
be far easier, safer, and much less taxing simply to tie the
guy down, whip his ass, and stay with the other "basics."
I think we all go through the more primitive stage in our early
experience as Tops, and the desire to enter into the more
exotic behavior described in this chapter and the next prob-
ably stems as much from a desire to experiment, and to delve
into the greater mysteries of our rites, as from anything else.
In other words, it is somewhat of an intellectual exercise, as
well as a high-level sexual experience. Especially if a Top
is working with an M who is new to his particular specialty,
there is great pleasure to be derived from the uncertainty and
obvious fear, when the practitioner knows his scene is per-
fectly safe and non-destructive. Likewise, even with an ex-
perienced bottom, it can be a tantalizing satisfaction to see
him shaken, because he is being led down a path he has
never trodden before, or is being taken considerably further
than his knowledge and experience permit him to under-
stand, orto predict the outcome or results. The Top sees his
M shaken, losing his cocky self-confidence, forced to aban-
don the projected boast: "I'm man enough to take anything
you can dish out." In this case, we are responding to a
challenge, proving our domination— or our right to dominate.
The M is being put through his paces and forced to respect
the Top, whose judgment (perceived, perhaps, as strength)
is the only factor standing between him and some extreme
hazard. It also permits a Top, who for any number of reasons
is unable to assume the responsibility for a full-time slave,
to experience a sense of total dominance.
Since forced submission is often the greatest fantasy, and
accepting these artificial conditions is merely an acting out
of this, I'd like to give you an account of involuntary, long-
term bondage, in which I'll try to pull together a number of
factors discussed in this chapter and the ones that went be-
fore. As I try to flesh out this fantasy for you, think back to
my remarks on the Stockholm Syndrome, and some of the
other long-term bondage comments. We'll take this little tale
232
from the standpoint of the M. And, for the sake of our fan-
tasy, we are not describing a "safe sex" situation.
When I was a kid, I was a rotten little bastard, I guess,
and it took something pretty drastic to make me stop long
enough to think about it. I'd always been good looking,
and smarter than most of the assholes I ran around with,
so everything came easy for me... easy, until my old man
walked out on us and Mom ended up in a county hospital.
My sister went to live with relatives in upper state Michi-
gan, but they wouldn't take me. I'd already been in trou-
ble
he could with the juvies,
handle me.and Unclefrom
I went Henry
one said
fosterhe home
didn't tothink
the
next, doing all the things that should have landed me in
jail, but never getting caught. I joined the Navy when I
was seventeen— lied about my age— but they booted me
out after a little less than a year. So at eighteen, I was
a street punk with a dishonorable discharge, and no place
to go. I drifted to Chicago, then New York, and I made
out okay, hustling and doing a little breaking-and-entering
when things got tight on the streets.
I drifted to lots of cities within the space of a couple
of years. I was twenty when I arrived in Houston... gone
there in late February, because it wasn't so fuckin' cold.
I soon had my regular spot staked out on the end of main
gay drag, not far from the Drum, and I had a couple of
regulars who used to pick me up after they struck out in
the bar. I'd been into SM scenes before, and I'd actually
gotten to like whipping ass and making the cocksucker
grovel in front of me, licking my boots and begging for
whatever I wanted to give him. I was strong and wiry, with
a hard look in my face that I practiced in front of a mir-
ror, so they really took to me... said I looked like a real
Topman, with my curly black hair and green eyes. I'd also
escaped the butcher's knife, so I had a nice full foreskin
that made my dick look bigger than it really was. Besides,
I wasn't very tall, so everything looked bigger on me than
it actually was— and it sure turned on a tall, athletic guy
to have me work on him.
233
 Everything had been going along pretty good, until the
pigs decided to crack down on the bars and op the hus-
tling; itwasn't safe to stand around on the streets, not
even if you pretended to be hitching. I was going to move
on when I made friends with another hustler stud,
named Jeff. He was a couple years older than me, and
a real bad one. I tell you, he was mean! But he liked me,
and he had this M streak in him... liked to be tied down
and worked over when he'd got enough dope into him.
But that's neither here nor there. We got along good, and
we made it together a few times. Finally, we moved into
the same room to save money while we waited for the
town to cool down. But Jeff wasn't just into hustling. He'd
done all kinds of dope in different places, and he'd been
in the joint more than he was on the outs. Finally, when
we were running short of bread, he tells me he's lined
up a good score.
There's this fag, he tells me, lives in a house out by
the edge of Melrose— vacant lots on two sides, easy pick-
ings. Iwasn't too sure, but we needed to score some
place, and Jeff seemed to know what he was talking
about. The next day, we looked the place over from the
outside, and decided to give it a try. By then we were
down to two bucks and change. Well, it was a bust from
the start. Jeff went in first, though a back window. He
came around to let me in the back door, but it had a dead-
bolt on it, so I had to climb in the same window. It was
close to 3AM, so we figure the guy has to be asleep
upstairs. What we didn't know was that the fucker had
an alarm system, one of those things that goes off in the
bedroom when someone's home, otherwise goes to some
police control center. Anyway, we're about halfway
across the living room when the light goes on and the
guy is standing on the stairs, stark naked except for a big,
old-fashioned six shooter in his hand.
"Just stay right where you are," he says, and he comes
down the rest of the way. As he comes around the bannis-
ter at the bottom, and starts toward us, he's givin' us
some bullshit about sitting on the floor with our hands
234
on top of our heads. That's when Jeff makes a grab for
the gun. And that's all she wrote. He's down on the floor
in a pool of blood, and I'm standing there about to shit
my pants. And by this time I do have my hands on top
of my head, because I'm sure this motherfucker's going
to plug my ass, too. I mean, I'm so fuckin' scared I don't
say one word!
The guy, who's about thirty-five or forty, and really
rough looking, he just stands over Jeff for a minute, looks
up at me, still pointing the gun straight at my gut. He
reaches down and feels Jeff's neck... testing for a pulse,
I guess. He nods, then, and stands back up. He looks me
over pretty good, kinda grins and nods his head. He's
really cool; I gotta give him that. He jerks the gun toward
a door in the waH under the stairs, and says: "In there."
I didn't know what he was up to, and I didn't ask. I just
headed for the door, opened it, and started fumbling for
a light switch. It was dark inside, but I could see stairs
going down into a basement. I found the switch, flicked
it on, and when I felt the gun barrel in my back, I went
down.
It's a kinda small basement, with paneled walls. There's
photo equipment... lights and tripods, couple of big cam-
eras on the stands, a desk, old carpet on the floor. He
went to the far wall, always keeping an eye on me, and
the gun pointed in my direction. He pulled out the edge
of one panel, then pushed it so it slid back. There was
another room, about the same size as the first one, ex-
cept this was a dungeon, man! I mean, a real dungeon!
He had chains and hooks, and all kinds of SM stuff, some
I'd seen before, others I didn't even know what it was.
"If you want to save your ass," he told me, "you'll do
just as I tell you. I haven't got time to mess around. I've
got to call the cops to take care of your friend up there,
and I can't wait too long to do it."
"Why should you want to help me?" I asked, although
I was already beginning to get the picture. Except, I didn't
have any idea how far it was going to go.
"That's for me to know and you to find out," he said,
235
sort of nasty. "You tell me how it's going to be, but let
me remind you of one point in law you may not know.
You were in the act of committing a felony when I caught
you. A man died in the course of that felony, and that
means murder-one for you if I turn you over to the cops."
I didn't know if he was bullshitting me or not, but I'd
heard about some fucked-up law like that back East, so
I decided to play along. "I guess I don't have much
choice, man," I told him. It had also occurred to me that
now I'd seen all this he'd probably take me back upstairs
and shoot me, too, if I didn't cooperate.
"You can start by stripping to the waist," he said.
I tossed my shirt and jacket into a corner and stood with
my back to him. In about two minutes he had steel cuffs
on my wrists, a chain around my neck, and a leather hood
with a gag in it over my head. I couldn't see anything at
all, but I could hear fairly well. I felt him unbuckle my belt
and pull my Levi's down around my ankles. He must have
used the belt to fasten my feet together. He tightened the
chain on my neck, pulling me up until I could barely keep
my toes on the floor. "You just stay there and keep
quiet," he said, "and pray that I get rid of the police be-
fore you strangle."
Well, I must have hung there for over an hour. My back
and legs were strained and aching, but I found I could
actually put my heels down on the floor if I took the pres-
sure of the chain around my neck for a few minutes. The
chain would cut off the circulation, but I could still
breathe, so I managed to do this every few minutes to
relieve the tension. I could hear them talking upstairs, al-
though couldn't
I understand what they were saying.
There were clumping sounds of guys walking around, and
at one point someone opened the basement door and
came down the stairs. There was some more talking in
the next room, and after a few minutes they went back
up. Texas police don't get too het up about somebody
shooting a burglar in his living room, and Jeff had broken
the window when he climbed in, so there probably wasn't
any question about how it happened. There'd been one
236
burglar, one shot, one stiff, and that's all there was to
it. The police finally took Jeff's body and left.
Now, I'd been doing some thinking while all this was
going on, and I'd figured out that if this guy lied to the
police about there being only one burglar, then he'd be
in for some real trouble if the pigs found me. And I
guessed what he'd done to me would be kidnapping. All
this wouldn't do me much good while he had me trussed
up like a hog waiting for slaughter, but it might give me
something to hold over him when he finished whatever
it was he intended doing to me. Unless he meant to kill
me, too! Jesus! That thought had just penetrated my mind
when I heard him coming back down the stairs.
I heard the panel slide open, and felt a gush of air
against my naked backside. I could hear him move across
the floor, and I actually felt the heat from his body as he
came to stand in front of me. "You were a good boy,"
he said. "You kept real quiet." He spoke with the trace
of a drawl, but he used good English, much better than
me. I figured him to be a college type, probably with a
good job someplace, maybe with a lot to lose if I ever got
the chance to squeeze him. I had it all figured out, what
I was going to say to him, as soon as he took the gag out
of my mouth.
Only, I didn't get the chance, not right away, anyway,
and by the time I did get a chance to talk, I was thinking
about a lot of other things. I felt him work the boots off
me, and pull the rest of my clothes off with them. The
floor felt cold against my bare feet, but it was soft, like
some kind of padded rubber. He put some cold steel re-
straints around my ankles, something with a short chain
between them, so I could walk about a half step at a time.
Then he unhooked the chain from the ceiling, so I was
able to take a decent breath for the first time since he
hung me up there. He walked across the rubber-covered
floor, holding hard onto my arm and guiding me with his
other big hand against the small of by back. I felt a piece
of wood come into contact with my shins, not hard; I'd
walked up to the place he wanted me.
237
 "You're standing in front of a sawhorse," he said, "and
I'm going to bend you over it. Just do as I say, now, and
you won't fall." He sort of leaned into me, with one hand
at the back of my neck, pushing me down, while the other
pushed into my gut, holding me back. I couldn't help
resisting him, because I was afraid I was going to fall as
he made me lean over so far I was losing my balance. With
the hood over my head, and not being able to see, I didn't
even have a very good sense of up or down, once he had
me bending. Then I felt a padded surface hit my stomach,
and he pulled my head down hard. I was lying across his
horse, feet still touching the floor, as he moved about
quickly. First, he attached my neck chain to something
on the ground, about a foot or more away from me. My
ankles were also anchored and there I was.. .chained
down, ass high in the air, my naked butt ready for what-
ever he decided to do with it.
I expected he would either start whipping me, or maybe
fuck me. I sort of gritted my teeth, or rather bit into the
leather gag, and waited. Instead, I heard him running
water. I didn't catch on right away... guess I hadn't been
around quite enough to know all the things these guys
get into. A few minutes later, though, I felt him start to
play with my asshhole, running a finger into me with some
grease on it. I tried to squirm away, because I'm not used
to having anything shoved up my ass, but I couldn't move
very much and next he shoved some sort of rubber or
plastic nozzle into me. Then I heard a little hand pump
go, and I felt the thing inside my butt swell up... felt like
it was going to bust my ass. I tried to yell at him, making
just a blubbering sound against the gag, and before I
could even do much of that I felt a flood of warmth into
my gut. The son 'bitch was giving me an enema!
I was so surprised and fuckin' mad, I did start to thrash
around, but he grabbed hold of me and held me still.
"You're only going to hurt yourself," he said calmly.
"You be a good boy and do as you're told, now."
Well, I don't know how many gallons he pumped into
me, but my guts felt like they were going to explode, and
238
the pain at a couple of points was awful. He did move me
back a little on the sawhorse, so the padded top hit the
bottom of my chest and left my belly free to take the
water. When he'd filled me, he did something to the thing
in my ass... disconnected it, I guess, from the enema bag.
He unfastened my head and ankles, made me stand up—
which made the load in my guts chum around again, and
I had to shit so bad I felt like a pregnant woman about
to give birth. But the plug in my ass kept it all inside as
he guided me into the corner, and backed me onto a toilet
stool. He reached between my legs, did something to the
thing in my ass, and pulled it out.
We went through the whole thing twice more, the last
time I was on the pot being when he pushed and kneaded
my belly to make sure everything came out. It was really
embarrassing by then, because he was not only using my
ass like he owned it, but he was even wiping my butt like
a fuckin' baby in between. Shit, I didn't even like to take
a crap with someone looking at me, and here I was going
through all this, naked, with chains on my wrists and
ankles, a hood over my head, and this guy Just working
me back and forth like I was some animal. Except to tell
me to move here, or turn there, he didn't say anything.
When he finally finished and had wiped my ass for the
last time, he led me back into the room, attached my neck
chain to the ceiling again, and kicked my feet as far apart
as the chain down there would allow. He fastened a
leather belt around my waist, stuck his greasy finger up
my ass— with no warning, so I bolted away. He put me
back in position, then shoved a rubber plug up my ass.
He brought the strap attached to this around between my
legs in front, worked my balls and cock through a metal
ring, and fastened this to the front of the belt. The back
end was already attached to the belt, so I was now in
some kind of harness, with my ass plugged solid.
I had grunted and moaned at various things he did, but
I couldn't say anything. The leather gag inside my hood
was very wide, pressing the side of my mouth and holding
my tongue down. I knew I had been drooling, especially
239
when he had me with my head down, but I couldn't help
it. Despite this, my mouth felt like it was full of cotton,
and I was getting real thirsty.
He left me standing there for quite a while— maybe fif-
teen minutes, maybe another hour. I don't know just how
long it was, but I wished he'd come back and do some-
thing...anything. I ached all over, my gut was sore, and
I felt like a plugged pipe with that rubber thing up my ass.
The cockring was tight about my dick, too, and even with
all the discomfort, I was afraid I might be getting a
hard-on.
I guess he must have left the room for several minutes,
because I was suddenly aware of another draft against
my legs. He took me down, and helped me lie on a table,
on my back. The surface was cold at first, which made
me flinch, but I didn't have long to think about it. I felt
him wash my cock and balls in warm water, then realized
it wasn't just water. The bastard was shaving me! I
squirmed around, but I was afraid to move too much, both
because I didn't know how close I was to the edge of the
surface, and I was also afraid I'd make him cut my dick
or my balls. I was yelling inside the hood, but he didn't
say anything, just worked until he'd scraped that fuckin'
razor all across my groin, between my legs, and over my
cock and balls.
I was really pissed. I could just see myself trying to play
Master to my next John with my crotch shaved. I'd be out
of action for a couple of months! Then I felt a cloth placed
across my groin. He took hold of my cock, pulled it
through a hole in the cloth, and I could hear the snap of
rubber. Then came some cold liquid on my dick. I was
scared, now, more than before, because I knew he was
doing something else, and I couldn't figure out what it
was. I felt him squeeze a gel of some kind into my dick,
work it in, and a minute later he shoved something solid
up the pisshole.
I really fought him, then, struggling to get loose and
yelling again into the gag. I tried to roll off the table, but
he held me down. "You try that again, punk, and I'm go-
240
ing to use something on you that'll really hurt," he said.
"Now hold still or you'll do yourself some harm."
I lay back, real tense and shivering. The butt plug ached
in my ass, and my whole body tensed as I felt the tube
go up my dick, and there wasn't a fuckin' thing I could
do about it, I could feel it go right up into me, and it felt
like it was going to start coming out of my mouth. Then
I had a terrific sensation in my balls and a terrible urge
to piss. He made a couple more adjustments, pulled off
the cloth, undid my chains, and stood me up again... back
where I'd started, standing in the center of the room with
the chain attached to the ceiling.
I felt him fooling with the back of the hood, and all of
a sudden he jerked it free and out of my mouth. The dim
light of the room made me blink, and I almost lost my
balance as the chain pulled tight against my throat. He
stood a couple of feet away from me, wearing just a pair
of jeans and boots with a wide black belt. He wasn't a
bad-looking dude, really, good body with lots of hair, sort
of dark brown, with dark, deep-set eyes. He was craggy
and tanned about the face, but he looked a lot harder than
he sounded, because his voice was kinda soft and young.
He stroked his chin with one hand, playing with the nar-
row little beard. "Now," he said, "I'm going to explain
exactly what your situation is." He picked up a can of
beer, took a swig and held it to my lips so I could take
the rest. Then he went on: First, you're my prisoner. No
one knows you're here, so I can keep you as long as I
like. I've cleaned you out and strapped a butt plug up your
ass. I've shaved you and put a catheter in you, and you're
drained for the moment. But from now on you'll piss only
when I want you to piss. You'll shit only when I take the
plug out. You'll eat and drink only what I give you. And
you'll keep on breathing only so long as it pleases me
to have you breathe. You're going to be my plaything,
and you're going to entertain me until I get tired of you."
"What.. .what's gonna happen to me when you get tired
of me?" I asked, my voice so raspy I could hardly speak
above a whisper.
241
 "That will be more or less up to you," he said, "It'll
depend on how much you've pleased me."
"You fuckin' bastard," I shrieked. "You'll never get
away with it," I tried to scream, but my throat was so dry,
even after the little bit of beer he'd given me, I could only
produce a croaking sound.
It didn't bother him. He just grinned at me. "I'm going
to give you a choice," he said. "Serve and service me
or..." He shrugged, spreading his palms in an open ges-
ture. "Tell you what; you can make all the noise you want.
I've got this room soundproofed, except for this." He
pointed to a microphone on the wall across from me.
"This connects to a speaker in my bedroom. I'm going
up there now for a little nap. You'll just stay where you
are until you decide to cooperate. When you do, just call
out to me. When I hear you, I'll come back and we'll go
from there. Of course, I may be asleep, so you may have
to call me more than once."
I wanted to answer him, telling him he could shove the
whole scene up his ass, but he just walked away, turn-
ing off the light and closing the sliding panel, leaving me
completely alone and in the dark. I could hear him going
up the stairs, but if he closed the door at the top it was
too far away and too muffled for me to catch the sound.
So I stood there in the dark, the tube leading out of my
dick and clamped so I couldn't piss, although I began to
feel like I was going to explode. My ass was tight and sore,
and my skin felt itchy and cold where he'd shaved me.
I wasn't really cold otherwise, but I had goose bumps all
over my naked body. The chain was not as tight about
my neck as it had been so I was easily able to stand with
my heels on the floor. I couldn't move more than that,
though. My legs and back were already aching, and the
pain got worse as I stood there. But I wasn't going to call
him. Fuck the bastard! The rotten faggot had caught me
off guard, chained me up... killed my friend, and now he
thought he was going to play games with me. Well, piss
on him! I stood there shivering, not from cold, but from
anger. I could feel that fuckin' tube up my dick, and the
242
plug in my ass, the chain around my neck holding me in
place. I was mad as a wet hen, but I couldn't move... and
to make it all the worse, I felt my cock arch out in front
of me, not really hard, but... Shit, I wasn't going to give in!
I have no idea how long I stood there. Once I must have
dozed off, because I was suddenly being strangled by the
chain and had to fight the drowsiness to keep my body
from falling. My mind drifted back to the various scenes
I'd had, where I'd always been Master, and that only made
it worse. My cock was enjoying the whole thing, poking
out there in the dark with the damned tube dangling from
the end. The urge to piss had passed, but now it was start-
ing up again. I wondered what the guy was doing... the
"guy"; I'd never even learned his name. He had the power
to end all this, the fucking asshole! All I had to do was
yell, say the magic words and he'd come down to let me
loose, But I swore I'd never do it.
I wondered how long. Two hours? Three? Was it light
outside? Must be. I must have been down there for half
a day. No way to tell. I could hardly hold myself up, I was
getting so tired. He had me tied up so I couldn't piss or
shit without his permission. Nothing to eat or drink unless
he gave them to me... no sleep, either, unless he let me
down. It was on the tip of my tongue to call him several
times, but I Just couldn't do it. Jesus, what if my throat
got so dry I couldn't call him? The thought struck terror
through my guts, but it also lit a little light in the back
of my mind. Why was I worrying about it? What did it mat-
ter whether I could or couldn't? I wasn't really going to
give in to him anyway, even if I pretended to, in order to
live, to get something to drink and maybe a few hours
sleep.
"Sir," I shouted, "I'll obey you, Sir!"
I hated myself for doing it, and I decided I'd spit in his
face when he came back down... after he'd given me
something to drink,
hurt! I waited... though. NoI was
and waited. so fuckin' thirsty, it
answer.
I hadn't expected him not to respond. "Sir, I'll obey you,
Sir!" I screamed out again, and there was still no answer.
243
Again, again, almost desperately. Maybe the f uckin' mike
was broken. Maybe the bastard was asleep and didn't
hear me. "Sir! Oh, please, sir! I'll obey you, Sir!"
My cries became a frantic, shouted chant. Every few
seconds I called, and called again. My voice cracked and
I actually started to sob. I was sagging against the chain,
choking as I tried to swallow, but there wasn't any spit.
I was dry and struggling and desperate. I called and
called, blubbering like a scared brat. I'd thought one call
would do it, and now I must have been bellowing at him
for hours, and nothing happened.
I had really given up. My calls had trailed off to a croak-
ing whisper, and it was all I could do to stand up so the
chain didn't hang me. I'd even toyed with the idea of end-
ing itright there. Hang myself on the chain, then let the
fucker do something with my dead body. But he could
do anything he wanted, I realized. He could dump my
corpse out in the desert, and nobody would ever know.
He had me.. .had me by the balls, and there was nothing
I could do but call out for him, praying he'd hear me and
come downstairs.
I hadn't heard him, but the light suddenly went on and
there he was... still wearing his jeans, but barefoot this
time. He looked at me without expression, watching
silently as I struggled to stay on my feet. I hated the
fucker, I thought. I really hated him, but if he'd turned
away and left me again I'd have done anything to bring
him back. I'd never been so glad to see anyone in my life!
"Let's hear it once more," he said softly. He walked
to the corner where there was a wash basin and the toilet
stool. He turned on the faucet and started to fill a plastic
cup with water. "Please... Sir. Let me have a drink of
water," I whispered.
"That isn't what you're supposed to say," he replied.
"But I've said it," I rasped. "I've said it a million times."
"And now I want to hear you say it again," he told me.
For a moment I was blind with rage. I twisted against
the cuffs, and felt the steel chain bite into my neck again.
He poured the water down the sink. Okay... okay... "Sir.
I'll obey you, Sir." I said it in a gasp.
244
 He was pouring the water again, this time with his back
to me. "I didn't hear you," he taunted me.
"Sir! I'll obey you, Sir!" I shouted it as loudly as I could,
and he came to me with the plastic cup of water. He let
me drink it, holding it to my lips, which were trembling
so badly I could hardly make them function. I dribbled half
of it down the front of my body, felt the precious drops
against my chest and belly, down onto my cock.
"Don't worry," he said. "You'll get another chance."
I thought he meant he was going to get me another cup-
ful. Instead, he tossed the plastic container away and
went to the shelf above the sink. He picked up a water-
ing can, one of those round things that look like a whis-
tling teakettle with a long, narrow spout on the end. He
brought this to me, and placed it on the floor at my feet.
Then he took the end of my catheter, stuck it in the water-
ing can, and released the catch on the tube. I felt the rush
of piss as it flooded out of me, bubbling into the can, half
filling it before it ran out. He closed the clamp again, and
stood up holding the can. "Still thirsty?" he asked.
"No!" I shouted at him. I wasn't going to drink my own
piss! He stood in front of me, holding the can, waiting
for me to say something more. He stared into my face,
eyes locked with mine for several seconds. Then he
shrugged, turned away and started back to the sink.
"It's up to you," he said. "This is all you're going to
get, and it's better to drink it hot. Kind of nasty when it
gets cold." He put the watering can back on the shelf
above the sink and turned toward the door. He snapped
off the light and stepped through the panel, getting ready
to close it.
"No," I called to him. "No, please don't go off and leave
me like this." I wanted to call him every name in the book,
but I knew better. He would just have gone out and left
me again, for God knows how long.
"Are you still thirsty?" he asked, pausing in the door-
way, the light still off.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm thirsty," I replied.
"That's not what I want to hear," he said, and stepped
completely through the opening.
245
 "Sir, please/' I shouted. "Sir, don't leave me."
"Well, it's still up to you," he said in that soft voice
with a trace of Texas drawl. "After I'd finished giving you
something to drink, I was going to let you down to rest
awhile."
"Yes, Sir! I'm thirsty, Sir," I gasped. "I'll obey you,
Sir!"
He came back, turned on the light, held the spout to
my lips and I drank it... drank it all. It was warm, a little
salty, otherwise not bad. Before I finished the canful, it
tasted like spring water to me, and I drained it dry. He
took down my neck chain, and led me to a leather covered
bench— the same one I'd been on when he shaved and
catheterized me, I guessed. He told me to lie down on
my back, which I did. It felt so good to let my muscles
go slack, that I hardly felt the pressure of the cuffs against
my spine. I was aware of his fastening my neck and ankle
chains to the top and bottom of the table, but I must have
let go, the tensions letting loose, and I passed out before
he finished fastening me down.

He must have abruptly turned on the lights, because

I woke up to a blinding glare, with a spotlight— in addi-
tion to the other lights in the room— shining directly into
my face. I guess I'd been dreaming, though I don't
remember about what. I know I woke so suddenly that
I tried to bolt upright, and was brought back hard by the
chain around my neck. Then the whole scene changed
to pain! My back, where I'd been lying on the wrist
manacles, felt like somebody'd kicked me. My legs were
sore and aching, but when I tried to move them I realized
they were partly numb, especially on the top of my thighs.
I was thirsty again, with my throat parched, and my belly
was rumbling, although it was a few minutes before I
realized how hungry I was.
I tried to see past the bright barrier of light, but I could
only make out a dull blur of movement near the sliding
panel. I guessed it must be daytime, but I had no way to
know. As I tried to move into a little more comfortable
246
position, I was suddenly aware of something soft between
my hands and back. While I'd been asleep, he'd put a
small pillow between my spine and the manacles! It was
a gesture of kindness I had not expected, and for a mo-
ment felt
I the urge to call out to him and thank him. But
that passed quickly away. The bastard had me trapped
and chained, with a tube stuck up my dick and a butt plug
wedged into my guts. For a few seconds I was mad again,
furious. I realized I had to piss, and my gut was aching,
too.
"How long you gonna keep me here?" I yelled. Only
it didn't come out in anything that sounded like a man's
voice. It was a crackly sound, like some old fart on his
deathbed, and that only made me madder. I wrenched my
body, pulling on the ankle chain and almost throwing
myself off the bench— would have fallen, if the chains had
been a little longer.
He was standing over me, dressed in just a pair of
leather chaps, big dick hanging out of the opening. His
body made a shadow fall across my face, and towered
above me... a big, dark form outlined by the flare of
brightness, hair on his head shining from the glow behind
him. He didn't say anything for a minute, and I just stared
up at him, my belly heaving in the retreating flood of rage.
I was so mixed up, I didn't know what to do. I was still
angry, but I was glad he was there. I was afraid of him,
because I didn't know if he was going to kill me, or what
else he might do to me before that.
"Please," I said finally, "please, Sir, I gotta piss."
He didn't speak, just unfastened the neck and ankle
chains and helped me stand up. I wobbled for a minute,
dizzy and unbalanced. My head throbbed and I almost
blacked out. He led me back to the center of the room,
put my neck chain back up to the ceiling hook, and started
fastening something onto my balls. I tried to look down,
but his shoulder was in the way. I could feel a leather
thong going around, squeezing my nuts, and I sighed at
the stab of pain. He ignored me until he'd finished. Then
he went to the corner of the John and came back with a
247
plastic bucket. He fastened this to a ring in the bottom
of my ball stretcher, set the end of the catheter into the
bucket, and released the catch. A flood of piss gushed
out of me, swirling in the pail. I could see the bubbly level
rising, while the weight began to pull on my nuts.
"I think I'll just leave this open," he said— the first thing
he'd said at all. He walked away from me, and I was afraid
he was going to leave. I was still a little dizzy, and I was
so thirsty I could hardly swallow. I was also afraid I might
pass out and hang myself. I looked down at the swirling
piss, and bad as I needed a drink, I felt sick to my stomach
at the idea of what he'd do if I said anything. The down-
ward pull on my balls was starting to hurt, too, and I could
feel a stab of strain up into the lower part of my belly.
The situation was hopeless! Being angry didn't do any
good. If I begged him, he'd just laugh at me. It finally
dawned on me just how helpless I was, how completely
powerless to do anything. And this fucking sadist knew
it, enjoyed it!
"Please, man. ..Sir," I said, "I hurt.. .Sir. I really hurt!
Can't you let me down? Let me take a shit... get some of
this stuff off me?"
"You hurt, huh? Tough shit!" He went out and closed
the panel.
Now I went through the worst of it. He still had some
pretty heavy things to do to me, but nothing was worse
than just standing there, naked in the glare of the light,
without even the former darkness to sort of tone down
the sensation. My ass hurt like hell, because standing up
had made everything settle down, ready to come out. The
weight on my balls was killing me, and if I shifted just to
relieve the tension in my legs, the liquid sloshed in the
bucket, and it would swing enough to increase the weight.
I must have stayed there for an hour or more, alternat-
ing in my mind between fantasies of what I'd do to him
if I ever got the chance, and crying real tears because I
wanted him to come back so badly. I remembered the
microphone finally, and wondered if he was where he
could hear me. "Sir," I called, sort of whispered at first,
248
then as loud as my aching throat would allow. "Sir, please
come back, Sir!" I must have called fifty times before I
heard the panel click and swoosh open.
Without saying anything, he came over, unhooked the
bucket from my balls, set it or* the floor, took me down
and led me to the pot. He unfastened the belt around my
waist and pulled out the plug. He shoved me down on the
toilet and stood back grinning, stroking his chin and
watching me. A stinking blast of water shot out of me,
the remains of the enemas, I guessed, that hadn't quite
made it the day before. I was humiliated, but so physically
relieved I could only hang my head and thank him. It came
without my even thinking about it. "Thank you, Sir."
He wiped my ass, hauled me up and draped me over
the horse again, shoved a tube up my ass and gave me
what must have been an enema douche. I knew it wasn't
much water, and this time it must have run out fairly clean,
because he only did it once again. He ran some water over
the butt plug, and started lubricating it again. "Oh, please,
Sir. Don't put that thing back in me." I was standing by
the John, feeling the dryness of my asshole, wishing I
could reach down to scratch it. I felt I had to piss again,
but he'd closed the catch on the catheter.
"Tell you what," he said. "I'll give you a choice.. .for
the moment at least. You can have the plug and be left
alone, or you can have some hot soup and take whatever
I decide to give you afterward."
"What do you mean by afterward... Sir?"
"That's for me to know and you to find out," he
answered smugly. Make up your mind."
I licked my lips, almost drooling at the idea of some-
thing to drink, and hot soup was just the right thing. My
guts churned with hunger. "I'll take the soup, Sir," I said.
He took me to the center of the room and had me kneel
down. He locked a longer length of chain to my ankles,
attaching it to a ring set in the floor. My hands were still
locked behind my back, but the neck chain dangled free.
The catheter was still in my dick, and the stretcher still
on my balls. He went out, closing the panel behind him.
249
I swiveled about on the floor, testing how far I could
move... not enough to reach anything. I settled back on
my ass, still kneeling with my ankles chained to the floor
in back of me. I waited... and waited. I thought he'd never
come back.
He brought back a big plastic bowl of soup, chicken
with noodles and vegetables in it. I could smell it the sec-
ond he opened the panel, and my hunger seemed to swell
up harder in my gut. He placed the bowl on the floor in
front of me, standing over it with his feet on either side.
"Go ahead," he said. "Lap it up."
I had a hell of a time balancing myself so I could get
my face down to the liquid without falling into it. I man-
aged, finally, and I lapped it up, sprawling at his feet, na-
ked and chained and slurping out of a bowl like a fuckin'
dog. But it tasted better than anything I'd ever had before
in my life! It was only canned soup, but it didn't matter.
I licked the bowl dry, then rolled onto my side to catch
my breath.
He kicked me. I hadn't been able to see him when I first
awakened, but in addition to his chaps he was wearing
a pair of heavy work boots. He struck my shoulder and
chest. "Get on your knees, asshole!" I struggled to get
enough balance to raise myself, and he kicked me again.
"Up!" he shouted. The pressure of his boot assisted me,
and I got back onto my knees.
He moved behind me, took the back of my neck in one
hand and shoved my face against the floor. My ass was
sticking up in the air as he stood up, planted one booted
foot against the back of my head and in almost the same
motion landed a hard crack across my ass with a leather
belt. I hadn't expected it, and cried out, trying to roll away
from him. He shoved his foot down harder. "Hold still,
or I'll strap you down," he snarled. And he let me have
it again.
He whipped my ass until I was blubbering in pain, yelp-
ing when he occasionally nicked my balls, where they
hung between my thighs in their leather stretcher. He un-
locked the ankle chain, finally, and half dragged me over
250
to the leather table. He tossed me face down on top of
It, locked my neck chain in place, and fell onto me. I didn't
know if he lubed me up or not, but his cock was inside
my ass before I hardly had time to think about it, and he
rode me like a wildman! I'd only been fucked a few times
in my life, and always for a good price and never with a
dick the size of his. The fucker was big— a lot bigger'n
me. It hurt, but it felt good at the same time, and before
he finished I was pushing back to meet him every time
he slammed his hips down against me. My fingers were
moving against the hard wall of his stomach, and I was
groaning with every thrust. He came, and relaxed on top
of me for several minutes before pulling out, coming
around to the head of the bench and shoving his half
hardened cock into my face. "Clean it off," he said. "Lick
it clean."
He sat down, straddling the bench with his crotch in
my face, and lifted my head by taking a handful of hair
and pulling it up. I obeyed him, listlessly at first, but finally
with more enthusiasm as he shoved his dick into my
mouth and started to get hard again. That was a lot faster
recovery than I would have been able to make. He forced
me to work on him for a long time, finally shooting a sec-
ond load down my throat and making me repeat the en-
tire cleaning routine. He got off the bench, and I knew
he was going to leave.
"Sir..." I didn't know exactly what to say to him. "Sir,
please... don't go."
"Why not?" he asked.
"I. ..I'm hurting, and I'm scared down here by myself."
"Afraid the bogeyman's going to get you? You should
have thought of that before you broke into my house."
He switched off the lights and left.
This time, he really stayed away for a long time. I dozed
off once or twice, but otherwise remained awake. My legs
were manacled, but not attached to anything. At one point
I got my feet onto the floor, but my neck was still attached
to the surface. The table wasn't nailed down, and I could
move it, but it was heavy. I wanted to sit on the floor, but
251
the neck chain was too short, and I had to get back onto
the table. I almost fell, but knew I'd choke if I did, so I
got back on top, lying on my stomach, and waited. I had
to piss, still, worse now than before, and I could feel the
slippery itchiness of my asshole, just out of reach be-
cause my hands were held by steel cuffs that were welded
together, with no chain between them.
When he finally came back, he talked to me soothingly,
stroking my back and shoulders before he freed my neck.
He took me into the corner and let me use the John, took
out the catheter after he'd drained me, explained that I
mustn't piss for a few minutes. He even had a toothbrush
and a tube of paste. He brushed my teeth for me, let me
rinse and gave me some water. He unsnapped the
stretcher from my balls, leaving me with just the cuffs on
my wrists and ankles, and the loose chain around my
neck. He let me have all the water I wanted, then led me
back to the center of the room. He chained me up by the
neck again, and tied a black bandana around my eyes.
Then he whipped me. He started off easily, but got
heavier and heavier, using a wide piece of leather— a belt,
maybe, or a paddle. It hurt like hell but he kept going,
working all over me, always landing the blows where I
didn't expect them, hitting every part of me from the neck
down, even working my cock and balls with something
lighter than he used on the rest of me. I was screaming
by the time he finished, pulling around and around against
the chain, but no matter what side I turned toward him,
he belted it. He concentrated, finally, on my ass, and
really whipped the hell out of it. At first I'd call him some
names, told him I'd get loose and take care of him. But
by the time he'd finished I was crying and begging him
to stop. It didn't do any good, and during a period when
I was quiet he suddenly broke off. I heard the whip drop
onto the floor, and for several minutes there wasn't any
sound except my own labored breathing, and I wondered
if he'd left.
Then he took hold of me, running his warm hands
across my naked body, stroking my shoulders and sides,
252
rubbing my ass and fondling my balls. Both hands closed
against the back of my head, and I felt his warm breath
on my face...smelled a trace of cigarettes and his lips
pressed onto mine. "Kiss me," he whispered. He pushed
roughly against me, the whole front of my body pulled
tightly against him, warm and sweaty skin against the
leather chaps, his cock shoved against mine. I resisted
him for a second. I'd, in truth, never kissed a man before.
"Kiss me like you mean it," he said again, and this time
I opened my mouth to him. I can't explain the reason for
it. There wasn't any, I guess. I just seemed to melt into
him, and for a moment I felt like I loved him. I know it's
stupid to say it, but I guess I was so relieved to have the
whipping stop, and his hands felt so good on my skin.
I couldn't help it. For that few minutes that he held me
and kissed me I did love him. He played with my cock until
it got hard, real hard and ready to shoot. But he stopped
before this happened, left me almost gasping, I wanted
to cum so bad.
He unfastened the chain from the ceiling and told me
to kneel. He made me blow him again; then leaving the
bandana across my eyes, he chained my ankles back to
the ring in the floor and left, without saying anything
more. As I heard the panel slide shut I wanted to cry in
frustration. He was leaving me alone again, and I didn't
want to be alone. The room was completely silent, ex-
cept for an occasional creak of a floorboard upstairs. It
was dark anyway, but the blindfold made it completely
black. For the moment I wasn't really hungry or thirsty,
but my whole body seemed on fire from the beating, and
my cock was still hanging out half hard in front of me,
and my balls were bubbling full. More than anything else,
I needed to cum, and there wasn't any way I could relieve
the tension.
He must have put me through this routine for a week
or more. He'd go away and leave me in the dark, come
back unexpectedly and let me take care of my bodily func-
tions. He'd use me, whip me, change my position so I was
sometimes chained to the table, sometimes to the floor,
253
sometimes attached by my neck to the ceiling. He put the
catheter in me again and left it for— I guess— several days.
He fed me soup and sometimes a sandwich. He'd clean
me out with an enema from time to time, and he'd brush
my teeth. I always knew that he was going to kiss me after
he did this, and I began to look forward to it. Those were
the only times when I felt halfway human, and gradually
I came to anticipate his caresses, knowing they would
come after he whipped me, and almost yearning for them
because it meant an end of the pain.
Except for the beatings, he never really hurt me, and
even the whip began to have a stimulating effect on me.
Once he'd let me cum afterward. He'd held me in his arms,
with my neck chained to the ceiling and played with my
cock while his tongue filled my mouth, and he'd kept it
up until I shot. It felt so damned good I'd almost cried,
and if I hadn't been chained up I'd have fallen on my ass.
When he went away, I felt a sadness that was like some-
one close to me had died. Sometimes I actually wept real
tears, waiting for him to come back. Somehow, I'd
stopped thinking about escape. There was no way I could
do it, anyway, and I was beginning to be... how can I say
it... I was feeling almost "at home" in this basement
dungeon. He had some kind of air circulation system, be-
causecould
I sometimes hear the faint hum of a blower,
and the temperature never got really hot or cold. Even
naked, as I always was, I was never really uncomfortable.
He changed my manacles a couple of times, always
making sure my neck and ankles were securely locked
when he freed my wrists, but he only did this to reposi-
tion my arms and let me rub out some of the stiffness.
When he left, my hands were always behind my back, and
I could never touch my cock to jack off, as badly as I
wanted to most of the time. I began to live for the sound
of his step on the stairs, and the click of the lock on the
sliding panel. I called him "Sir" all the time.. .never knew
his real name, anyway, and the feeling I had for him was
like a dog for his Master. I couldn't explain it, or under-
stand it;I just felt it, and in a strange way I was—if not
254
happy, at least content during those moments when he
was with me.
One day, I had been alone for a long period, when I
heard the doorbell ring upstairs. I had never heard it be-
fore, and I strained to hear what else was going on up
there. Several people must have been walking around,
because the floorboards creaked in a number of different
places at once. I heard a couple of doors open and close,
and the murmur of voices. It got quiet, I guess when they
all went up to the second floor, then more creaking when
they came back down. I heard the door to the basement
open, and several pairs of feet on the stairs. The voices
got louder as I knelt there in the darkness, hands cuffed
behind me, naked and unable to move more than a few
feet. But I was not gagged. I could have called out. In-
stead, held
I my breath, trying to hear what they were
saying.
"...was with Jeff all that day, and must have been with
him when he came here." This from a deep, harsh voice
I didn't recognize.
Then I heard Him say, "I can't help that, Sergeant. The
guy was alone when I caught him. If anyone else was out-
side, he got away without my seeing him."
Then I heard Bret, a guy who lived in the rooming house
where Jeff and I had shared a room. "Well, I can't under-
stand it.The kid was with him all day, and after that night
he never came back. All his clothes and stuff are there.
I know something has to have happened to him."
"Well," He said, "you can see he isn't here."
The steps started back up again, and it was on the tip
of my tongue to call out. That's all I would have had to
do, and they would have come and found me. But I didn't.
I felt my heart thumping in my throat, and there was
clammy sweat on my body, but I kept quiet. I waited for
the intruders to leave, because I knew He would come
down to me, and I knew He'd have to be grateful.
255
CHAPTER ELEVEN— The Advanced
Specialties, Group II
Progessing on via my nefarious logic, the subjects I am group-
ing into this second advanced category include some of the
more severe blackroom disciplines: woodshed action and^
caning, electrotorture, and military discipline. As in the pre-
ceding chapter, we are as concerned here with the psycho-
logical aspects as with the physical, although the physical
activity can become very heavy.

Childhood memories. The type of punishment we re-

ceived as children, or didn't receive but knew other kids did,
is often translated into the SM fantasies we have as adults.
These flights of mental fancy are not limited to the ex-
periences we actually had, or which our playmates told us
about; much of the direction these adult fantasies take is
caused by the prevailing punishments meted out to kids in
our particular culture. For instance, the American fascination
with "good old-fashioned woodshed discipline" is as firmly

256
rooted in the frontier mentality of middle America as the
"public school" cane is a part of British tradition. Naturally,
with the advent of our mass media and rapid means of both
transportation and communication, we find these values
transplanted from one culture to another, and may find an Iowa
farm boy growing up with a fetish centered on the military
disciplines of Nazi Germany, or a Japanese who hankers for
the US Cavalryman's crop.
I like to think that I have been instrumental in causing some
of the greater admixture of interests, simply by exposing peo-
ple of various cultures to the fine points of discipline from
others. I have, naturally, had a great deal of help in this. At
any rate, here I am, at it again, trying to enlighten you with
a brief survey of these wonderful memories, as a number of
people have shared them with me.
I believe that in virtually all western cultures, as well as a
number we would consider eastern, or at least beyond the
Iron Curtain, it is customary for a father to take his miscreant
son out to the woodshed, or into the basement, or some other
relatively private place, and whale the tar out of him as punish-
ment for some transgression. But, just as it happens with peo-
ple who are active in SM, there are going to be fathers who
are psychologically unable to carry out this form of culturally
approved punishment. Or there is no father in the house, so
the mother does it, or an uncle, or. . . ? Regardless of who
administers the actual punishment, most kids are treated to
this experience at least a few times during their formulative
years. Those who are deprived of it are nonethele ;s aware
that it happens to their friends and schoolmates. Thus we have
adults emerging from these (our) cultures who may carry emo-
tional scars because the punishment they received was
perceived as abuse, or we may have the exact inverse situa-
tion: an adult emerging from a culture where most of his
friends were punished physically, whereas he was not. The
emotional residuals in this man may be even deeper and more
interesting, especially if he (then or now) perceives this lack
of childhood punishment as deprivation. This latter condition
is more common and more easily come by than most people
realize, because kids who do get punished will often take a
257
very macho stance before or after, and their ability to stand
up to the discipline makes them mini-heroes among their
peers. A child who is never punished never has this
opportunity.
Even in England, where corporal punishment in "public
schools" (in the US we would call them private schools, or
boarding schools) has been a tradition for centuries, there
is now a rising tide of public sentiment to do away with it. But
to the English schoolboy, "six of the best" is still a fearsome
threat, and for some an erection-building prospect. The cur-
rent clamor for an end to this form of punishment in the
schools is supported by the ridiculous assertions of a clique
of child psychologists that corporal punishment creates hostil-
ity in the child, and that the surest way to create a deliquent
is to physically punish him. It makes me wonder how they
reconcile their assertions with the British system which pro-
duced such men as Nelson and Churchill.
But regardless of the social consequences, these early ex-
amples ofphysical discipline have left their marks on many
men— the emotional mementos proving far more durable than
the physical. For those with an SM inclination, the recall is
often the core of a lifelong fetish. I do not feel this is necessari-
ly an argument in support of those who would do away with
corporal punishment, since the men who fantasize on these
fixations today would probably have centered their thoughts
on some other mode of punishment if they had been deprived
of the reality or the stories from their peers about the wood-
shed or the cane.
To some extent, a shrink might be justified in labelling these
fetishes "infantile" or "juvenile," since they do stem from child-
hood fixations. But there really isn't anything wrong with that,
since most of the activities we learn to do or enjoy as adults
have their roots in boyhood memory. In practice, I have found
a goodly number of guys who dig the woodshed or the cane
are also seeking a "father figure" to administer it. This is by
no means a universal truth, but a circumstance to be aptly
labelled "common occurrence."

Woodshed discipline. In this fairly straightforward scene,

258
the M is treated to a make-believe boyhood punishment situa-
tion. Just as daddy used to take his kid out to the woodshed,
command him to drop his pants, and administer a proper
strapping across the naked buttocks, the S makes a similar
demand and usage of his M. Although the actual father-son
sequence seldom involved more than a command to assume
an appropriate position, followed by the administration of a
proper number of whacks, the SM surrogate may be rather
more elaborate.
It is not unusual to have the bottom secured by his wrists
and ankles, frequently bent over the edge of a table, or com-
pletely draped on a sawhorse. Most scenes do not involve
much else in the way of equipment. Cock and ball harnesses,
hoods, blindfolds, etc., are seldom used. I know of a few Tops
who like to gag the M, which precludes his being able to count
the strokes. . not a terribly important consideration in my
opinion, anyway, since I feel the stroke counting routine to
be more appropriate to military discipline— a subject we will
discuss later in this chapter.
Basically, the woodshed scene should be kept fairly sim-
ple from the standpoint of bondage, and the instrument used
to administer the punishment should also be of a variety that
Daddy would have been likely to use: a belt, paddle, razor
strop, or possibly a keen switch. A birch rod is quite in keep-
ing with the overall setting. The M can also be positioned
across the Top's knees (thighs) for a "spanking" scene. The
actual whipping, or "thrashing" as it may appropriately be
called, should be fairly heavy— my reason for including it in
the "advanced" category.
In keeping with the simplicity of the setting, elaborate light-
ing effects, music, or drugs are inappropriate. Just the sound
of the falling switch and the cries of the "boy" suffice to create
the desired atmosphere. Some conversation to enhance the
fantasy is often included, although many guys feel silly if they
carry the play-acting to this extreme. Still, for the man who
likes to visualize himself back in childhood, the role-playing
can be important. Since I really don't know any Tops for whom
the woodshed scene is of paramount importance, I would ven-
ture to suggest the scene is basically the M's. If the Top is
259
going to play it with him, he might as well go all the way and
fully flesh out the bottom's fantasy. I see it largely as a "curtain
raiser" anyway, in that it tends to be of shorter duration, often
serving as a preamble to other, more imaginative activities.

English caning. In much the same category as the Ameri-

can woodshed is the old British tradition of caning. For cen-
turies, Eton and Harrow and many less famous schools have
maintained caning as the principal punishment for various
serious transgressions. In some schools only a master
(teacher) could do this, in rare instances the headmaster; in
others, the upperclassmen ("prefects") were authorized to
punish the younger boys when it was required. Because of
the strict honor codes, many of which were more a matter
of tradition than written rules, the privilege of administering
punishment was seldom abused. It was taken as a matter of
course, with both giver and recipient knowing from the mo-
ment a certain misdemeanor was discovered, exactly how
many strokes were going to be administered. The boys' at-
titude was generally one of complete acceptance, based on
an assumption that getting caught meant a fair punishment.
The term "cane" does not refer to a walking stick, but to
a thin, reedlike switch resembling a bamboo sapling. It is sup-
ple in all its forms, and its availability in a number of diameters
allows for a certain variance in the degree of punishment, in
addition to the number of strokes and the strength with which
they are applied. When I was in London a couple of years
ago, my friend Felix gave me one of the canes from his collec-
tion, and it has become a prized artifact on the wall of my
blackroom. I have used it sparingly, however, because I have
been afraid of breaking it. On the one occasion when I had
a genuine graduate of the British "public school" in for a ses-
sion, itcame to a good use, and was much appreciated by
the recipient.
As an illustration of the English cane syndrome, let me quote
from a letter by an English correspondent which I used in one
of my collections in the now out-of-print Leatherman's Wook-
book series. It is interesting to note the English tendency to
ascribe some of these traditions to the Germans, whereas
260
I have had Germans and Austrians write to me, referring to
the identical behavior as English:

For over forty years I've been studying and practicing

the none-too-gentle arts of what the Germans call "peda-
gogical discipline'— or the parental and schoolmaster fan-
tasy. Some years ago, I acted the schoolgirl— now the dis-
obedient schoolboy or stepson.
SM/leather covers a lot of ground. My only interest in
leather is that strops, tawses and whips are made of it.
I tend more to the male S; but the older officious burly
woman as an S— some Lez— is quite satisfying. Just as
the point of view expressed by my own father, an ardent
flagellator, that "bottoms are sexless." Perhaps the divid-
ing line is in that our interests revolve definitely around
the "bottom" (seldom "ass") and about spanking, can-
ing, stropping, birching of that posterior area-
flagellation, primarily.
Just as "ass" becomes "bottom" or "backside," so the
culprit is arched up over a bench, bent over a stool or
bed— never spread-eagled. If fastened at all, it is only used
for one reason... to prevent avoidance of the thrashing.
Scolding, humiliation are ever present, but in the style
of a young boy. He is not degraded. Other punishments
of childhood of which we are fond are the enema, supposi-
tories, etc., castor oil, washing the mouth out with soap,
spanking the penis for masturbating. Sodomy plays a part
more often than not....
Few "schoolboys" seek orgasm until the scene has
been played....
As I said, I've made a long and deep study of the
schoolboy-schoolgirl syndrome. Among my "tutors" have
been, or are, a Prince, three ambassadors, a bishop and
three other clergy.
A schoolboy flogging is a long, usually public and terri-
fying proposition with ample warning to provide time to
anticipate, slow but sure preparation and a leisurely inflict-
ing of mounting and enormous pain, leaving ridges, welts
and cuts for as long as a fortnight or more.
261
 Where there is a following of SM among heteros, it is
usually centered about flagellation; either the M or the S
is likely to be accepting of either male or female partners.
In the British public (boarding) school in the thirties, the
older boys observed carefully— as did the housemas-
ters—which lads of 10 to 13 had erections when watching
or preparing for a flogging. More attention would be cen-
tered on these, who were in fact destined to be held firmly
across a sofa back at tea time to lose their schoolboy vir-
ginities, on pain of flogging:
I do feel we owe a great debt to the English, since the tradi-
tion offlogging has always seemed to permeate their history,
and in so many respects they have refined it into a truly fine
art. From the schoolboy syndrome, we might pass quite easily
to the shipboard flogging, and to the public whippings which
until very recently (1970's) were still taking place on the smaller
islands (Sark, for one). Beneath that veneer of sophisticated
arrogance there existed a wonderful reservoir of savagery. I
hope our latter-day do-gooders are not going to succeed in
completely extinguishing it. Of course, with all the rest, there
was a good deal of buggery (ass fucking) going on in these
secondary institutions of learning, and since this involved boys
who were quite young, we find the sharpest departure from
our own SM interests. Chicken is not only a legal "no-no,"
but I have found in any survey of tastes, formal and other-
wise, that very few SM guys have an interest in the immature
youngster. The interest in "chicken" which does exist, seems
to be centered more on the sexually mature 14- to 17-year-
olds than on prepu Descent boys.
I have also been interested to note the consistency with
which the British and other European flogging traditions seem
to agree with my old premise: men are flogged standing up;
boys are punished bending over. I can't remember the source,
but something I read years ago on the subject of British prison
flogging pointed out that birching of the buttocks replaced
whipping across the back because while the latter's results
could be displayed with macho pride, the former was a mat-
ter for shameful concealment: the punished man had been
humiliated by being "treated like a boy."
262
 Military discipline. Progressing quite logically from the
schoolyard to the military compound, we find a variety of well-
established traditions in every nation with an army or navy.
The lesser floggings that took place in the housemaster's
study graduated into full scale assaults in the settings of an
18th or 19th Century sailing ship or parade ground. Anyone
who has read Richard Dana's autobiographical Two Years Be-
fore the Mast is familiar with the type of punishment on which
the SM derivations are based. In the contemporary simulated
military prison a number of scenes are popularly enacted,
based on such diverse situations as: stockade detention and
punishment; USAF survival training; interrogation of POWs,
including the use of French Legionnaire electrotorture; Marine
boot camp with D.I. instruction and punishment; parade
ground stripping and humiliation; Nazi prison camp; oriental
(Korean or V.C.) prisoner abuse; sailing ship flogging. All these
situations call for a heavier type of punishment than we might
normally expect to find in an ordinary blackroom scene. The
one element common to all of them, and which perhaps
characterizes them, is that the punishment is clearly specified
before the game begins, and once started is always carried
to completion. It is not called off at the request (or sobbing
plea) of the M: traditionally, the punishment was always com-
pleted, even if the victim had expired somewhere along the
way.
Naturally, the line between dominant and submissive is very
clearly defined, and the scene itself may involve extremely
elaborate props and costumes. However, there may be steps
or levels of command involved, creating in effect a junior S—
for instance the prison guard— who is subservient to the ser-
geant or officer in charge, both concentrating their energies
on making the prisoner's life more miserable. If the available
cast of characters is large enough, there may also be a senior
M position, where one of the prisoners is placed in temporary
charge of the others. The variations are as infinite as the his-
tory of military discipline and imprisonment, and limited only
by the reluctance of so many guys to participate. Like the true
Master-slave relationship, the real military scene is one of total
involvement for its full duration.
263
 I know of several men who conduct these sessions from
time to time, and a couple of them have very well equipped
facilities. Generally, I would not recommend trying to do it in
an apartment, or even in a house with close neighbors on
either side. It takes a place in the country, with enough ground
to be isolated from the morbid curiosity of snoopy bystanders.
This is not to say that a short military scene cannot be played
out in an ordinary blackroom, with the M required to go
through his paces and getting his ass smacked, or com-
manded todo pushups, etc., when he fails. But the full-scale
scene, with cells and uniforms and outdoor action, can only
properly be done in seclusion. After all, who ever heard of
a sailor being stripped and lashed to the mast in someone's
basement? It has to be outside, under the open sky, with the
breeze caressing his skin between strokes of the cat.
Always bear in mind that a military scene differs from the
usual SM relationship, where a willing, obedient M does his
best to please. The military game is an adversary situation,
and basically falls into one of two categories: training and dis-
cipline ofrecruit, or prisoner vs. guard. In either case, the Top
is expected to assert his authority forcefully. If he fails to do
so, it is within the rules of many games to have the tables
turned on him... particularly in the prison setting.

Electricity. Because it is more commonly used as a part

of the military scene than as part of any other specific activ-
ity,think
I this is the most reasonable place to include a discus-
sion of electricity and its various uses in an SM setting. I
should note that I have avoided this subject in the past,
perhaps as a result of my own respect for the negative powers
of electrical current. I did not wish to suggest any behavior
that might have led someone to experiment and thereby come
to a tragic end. However, it has now become apparent that
many people are playing with electricity, and some of them
are doing things far worse, and far more likely to result in some
catastrophe than any behavior I might have described. It is
better, from my own point of view, and from the standpoint
of my conscience, to tell you the right way. If you go ahead
and electrocute yourself in spite of these warnings...?
264
 Used properly, electricity can provide a unique sensual ex-
perience, and can greatly enhance a scene. It can also be
used as a tortuous device, either by applying current to a sen-
sitive area or by threatening to do so. As always, let me state
a couple of safety rules before going into the specifics of these
activities. Generally speaking, no electrical current should
ever be applied above the waist. I tell you this, because some
of the things people are doing to themselves and to other peo-
ple are almost the same as procedures performed by a physi-
cian to reactivate the heart in a cardiac arrest, or to alter the
heartbeat in a person suffering from irregular cardiac rhythm.
Attaching leads to a cattle prod and setting these via alligator
clips on the nipples is precisely the type of irresponsible be-
haviormean
I to warn you against. Second, stay away from
house current, or direct current from a high-powered battery.
Even if you think you are stepping it down through a trans-
former, there is always the possibility of error. If a transformer
blows out on an appliance, the worst you lose is a piece of
expensive equipment. If it blows out when it's attached to you,
your parts are a little more difficult to replace. If you want cur-
rent, use batteries— not an automobile battery! Your very best
bet is not to use current at all, but to rely on vibration or static
electricity via oscillation.
My first experience with electricity in a sexual setting was
demonstrated for me years ago, by a guy whom I consider
a complete nut, and who scared me so badly I refused to have
any part of electricity except for lamps, toasters and TV. He
used house current and a goldfish bowl full of water, and what
he did I will not describe in detail, because someone some-
where will try it, and end up on a slab in the morgue. I have
since encountered people with a much more sane approach,
and have found several procedures that are both reasonable
and tantalizing. I'll try to describe a few of these for you.
For openers, remember that your intent in using electricity
in an SM scene is usually to stimulate only the sensors in
the skin, which are on— or very close— to the surface. You
have no need to work for a deeper penetration into the body
tissues, where you could do harm to internal organs or the
neurological system. For this reason, you never need much
265
current to create the sensations you seek. In effect, you are
"skimming" the electricity across the surface — much like
skimming a rock across the surface of a pond, as opposed
to throwing a boulder into the water to create a big splash.
It is the ripple occasioned by the tingling contact that is so
tantalizing. Like orgasm, it can be a feeling so exotic as to
verge on pain.
Since there is nothing absolute in the use of electricity, and
since different people react very differently because of their
individual sensitivity, you should always start off easily, build-
ing up as you note the responses you are getting. Oscilla-
tion, with frequencies of 500 cycles per second (CPS) and
up are reasonably safe, and will create the same sensations
as the use of current, but without the same potential for in-
jury. As with enema equipment, there have been a number
of quack cures over the years... pseudo-doctors producing
"wonder machines," many of which are actually doing no
more than converting current into oscillation. If you come
across one of these in a junk shop or secondhand store, you
might consider acquiring it. As long as it is not applying cur-
rent to the body, it is probably harmless (and medically
useless), but can provide the type of sensual thrill you are
seeking. If you're technically adept, you can make your own.
It involves transforming the current, from whatever source,
into a tube or wand (usually glass) on the end of a fairly long
cable. Only this glass part is ever touched to the skin, and
if the transformer malfunctions, the worst it will do is to cause
the wand to go dark. Even so, an additional safety precau-
tion is to have the subject isolated (insulated), so to speak,
by having him lie on a wooden surface, with no metal in con-
tact with his body. Beer and other liquids should be well
separated from the entire setup. The sensation is like "static
cling" against the skin.
If you do not understand the principle I am describing, I
suggest you do a little study of the subject before trying to
play with it. The technique is somewhat sophisticated, but
fairly easy to understand if you have any knowledge of elec-
trical theory. Trying to give step by step instructions is going
to be useless unless you have the background, and if you
266
are qualified in the area you don't need it. This is one instance
where you will have to do some research on your own if you
want to produce your own toy.
Probably the most clever device I have seen, involved the
use of a regular household doorbell (buzzer type), run off bat-
teries. The buzzer was mounted on a small block of wood,
and a pair of clips were attached to the wooden base via a
couple of long wires. When the buzzer was activated, the
vibrations were carried to the nipples, or whatever part of the
body was attached to the clips; but there was no current in-
volved at all, since the wood insulated the buzzer from the
wire leads. For electrical tit torture, it was the best device I
have seen, since it could not in any way pose the potential
threat of crossing the "heart line."
The popularity of cattle prods in recent years, and their use
as tit shockers is appalling. Bad enough that they be used
below the waist, where they can become a true instrument
of torture. I would remind you that these devices are designed
for use on animals with hide equivalent in thickness to 22
gauge steel. By comparison, your skin is tissue paper. Used
in a heavy scene, with quick, glancing contacts, they can pro-
vide the type of stimulation some guys get off on, however,
and in this context they are a legitimate blackroom device.
They come in different sizes, and with different strengths. You
can really burn somebody with one of the big babies, and even
the small ones should not be used with leads off the two
prongs, wired to alligator clips, although I know this is a
popular modification. There is too high a probability of the
M's being subjected to a harmful shot of current, since the
clips are inevitably stuck onto an extremely sensitive area
(penis or scrotum). With the M secured by his wrists to a solid,
overhead object, his naked body can be put through a frantic,
twisting dance by split second applications of the prod to the
large muscles of his thighs and buttocks. This is the only way
I feel a cattle prod should be used.
The use of hand crank or "Kentucky" telephone magnetos
has been a popular practice for years, and in its serious appli-
cation became a widely used interrogation device in North
Africa (French Foreign Legion) and in the Korean and Viet-
267
namese theaters, apparently by interrogators on both sides.
In these situations, the users did not much care if they dam-
aged their subjects. Connecting wires to a prisoner's testicles,
cock, or via a metal plug into the rectum, the torturer could
elicit responses by turning the crank on the generator
(magneto) until the surge of current became unbearable.
Some of the victims of these sessions later died, or lost the
use of their sexual equipment as a result of their experiences.
If you are going to use an old telephone generator, it is best
to take out one of the magnets (if it will come out) to decrease
the potential current. Before you try it on anyone else, experi-
ment on yourself, so that you will know how much current you
are generating. It is good idea to place a small light bulb on
the line between the generator and the subject to indicate how
much current is going through. I admit that the simulated inter-
rogation scene can be very exciting and I know a number of
people are playing with it; but keep the contacts below the
waist. The most popular areas for setting these are: one at
the root, and one at the tip of the cock; one on the cock, the
other up the rectum, via a metal plug. I assume you know
better than to stick a raw wire up either the cock or the anus,
although you can wrap a wire around the genitals. Remember,
in using this type toy, the current should never be at high level
for more than a split second. You will find this to be far more
tantalizing, anyway, and the threat of a repeat will produce
more effective results than trying to fry the guy's balls by
cranking at the generators. If you want to buy one of these
devices, and can't find it locally, check the ads in the back
of Radio Electronics or Popular Electronics magazines.
Let me remind you again that in any situation where the
M is taking current, he should be on a nonconductive sur-
face; i.e., he should not be grounded, or near any liquid that
could spill on him. Naturally, anyone who touches him while
he is getting the stab of current is going to feel it, too. Then,
regarding my cautions about the use of current above the
waist, I know some people are going to do it on the chest or
arms, anyway. If you do, at least don't cross the "heart line";
i.e., stay on one side at a time. This has to be your important
268
safety precaution, even with the use of electrostatic equip-
ment, or oscillation devices.
Another "medical device" from the turn of the century was
called a "skin sterilizer." This was actually no more than a
plug-in device, attached by an insulated cord to a mushroom-
shaped glass tube. The tube emitted ultraviolet light, and was
completely harmless (except for potential eye damage if held
too close to the head). It had a fantastic visual effect, and ap-
plied to sensitive areas such as nipples or genitals, produced
a wonderful tingling, just below the threshold of real discom-
fort. Itwould not be difficult to duplicate. From the same
period, there were electrical belts made to cure disease, and
any number of "black boxes" that emitted vibrations, oscilla-
tions, heat and light. Dating from this period, and still being
manufactured today are a number of "galvanic" devices, in-
tended to produce or measure the electrical conductivity of
the skin. Many of them, if you can find them at a reasonable
price, have wide SM applications since they create a variety
of tantalizing skin sensations without ever subjecting the guy
to a surge of electrical current.
A 9-volt transistor battery, although not generally popular,
can be used safely, even on the nipples. Applied to a blind-
folded M's tit, it feels exactly like being pierced. Likewise, on
the cock and/or balls. This works best if the area to be touched
is wet and/or salted ahead of time— which also enhances the
sensation of piercing, since the subject may think you are ap-
plying antiseptic. Lick the terminals to ensure a good con-
tact (one at a time, tingle-tongue!).
Another popular device in fairly common use by electrical
aficionados is the Relaxacisor, a pseudo-scientific machine
that enjoyed a fairly wide distribution a few years ago. It
worked by attaching electrodes to either end of a specific mus-
cle or set of muscles, and passing a small amount of current
through it. The principle was that the muscle could be artifi-
cially exercised, without any effort on the part of the person
using the machine. . .a sort of lazy man's Nautilus. It was
forced off the market by the Fed, because part of the regular
routine involved working muscles above the waist, and cross-
ing the heart line with the current. Immediately after the
269
product was taken off the market, it was illegal for a private
party to sell his machine to another person. I do not know
what the current rules may be in all cases, but I do know a
number of people have acquired these old machines and are
using them for erotic purposes. Structurally, the machine con-
sists ofa control box, usually built into a carrying case about
the size of a doctor's bag. It has a number of "pads" (like
large galvanic contacts), attached by wires to the control box.
With the pads strapped onto the body in strategic locations,
the machine shoots little spurts of current through the mus-
cle and makes it contract. The Relaxacisor is fully adjustable,
with a potential for erotic stimulation up to and including the
point of torture. The pads are commonly placed on the soles
of the feet, in the crotch, ass, or armpits. Some guys have
used rods inserted into the anus or into the penile canal. The
few accidents connected with these attempted erotic usages
have resulted mostly from the Top jacking up the current too
fast, and producing a muscle spasm. Since the worst of these
injuries were on the arms and shoulders, I really recommend
that the machine not be used above the waist. It is certainly
less erotic in this area, anyway, and the potential dangers are
too great in relation to the potential sensation. People who
have extensive experience with the machine suggest its best
use is near the beginning of a scene, to build up the subject
for something else. Restraints are generally used, but they
should be loosely applied, with at least a six- to eight-inch
leeway for movement. As the machine stimulates muscle
response, a hard binding can cause injury With no binding,
it is possible for the subject to kick involuntarily and hurt
himself or whoever is standing near him.
There are various other devices and homemade specialties
in use by people advanced in the techniques of electrotorture.
For the beginner, I think I have covered the basics, and really
do not want to try describing very much more. I ask you, again,
to observe the safety precautions I have noted, and noted
again. I also feel that drugs do not belong in this scene, cer-
tainly not for the Top, and the M should be alert enough to
provide the clues his Master needs to be sure he isn't doing
him some serious injury.
270
 Heavy and public humiliation. Whereas humiliation is one
of the heaviest SM head trips, it is seldom practiced outside
the privacy of the blackroom. When it goes beyond this, I think
it exceeds the limits of the average bottom, and thus becomes
a "specialty'— perhaps an M specialty as differentiated from
the others, which basically rely on the skill of the Top for their
success. The fantasy is there for many men— the idea, for
instance, of being stripped naked, bound, and led by a halter
about the genitals in front of a large group of detrac-
tors. . maybe to be whipped or gang fucked in some popular
sex club, with many people looking on. Few M's would really
want this to happen to them, but these few are an interesting
lot.
There is not a great deal I can tell you, other than to list
some of the scenarios and let you think about them. I sup-
pose one of the grand fantasies is of an adult man being sub-
jected toheavy abuse by a youngster. The old college frater-
nity initiations involved all kinds of public humiliation, but these
were generally not very sexual. I have received a number of
letters from a correspondent in Japan, whose heavy fantasy
is being stripped naked and forced to serve as a steed for
an adolescent Caucasian. Another guy in Canada wrote about
his public humiliation when forced to wear women's clothes,
and scrub the sidewalk outside the town's most popular
tearoom ("cottage" to our European friends). I suppose the
most common form of public humiliation is for the Top to lead
his slave into a leatherbar by a dog leash, attached to a leather
slave collar about the guy's neck. I have also seen M's kneel-
ing on the floor beside their Masters' bar stools, sometimes
with their hands cuffed behind their backs.
One of the great fantasies is to be stripped and put through
a disciplinary session in front of one's fellow soldiers (sailors
or Marines). Just the masochism involved in becoming a re-
cruit ina very heavily disciplined military organization, inspires
the imagination. I see all of this as a series of variations on
the same theme, and all bound together by a common, high
level of submissive need on the part of the M, the reverse
for the Top.
271
 The use of fear. I'd like to comment on this, the last sub-
ject in this chapter, as perhaps the ultimate head trip, and
a condition present in most of the other areas covered. (Fear
of electricity, for instance, is one factor in making it such a
turn-on.) Manipulation of the M's phobias to create a few
moments of terror can produce interesting results. To do this
requires a fair amount of skill, or insight, on the part of the
Top, because it can be dangerous if you are dealing with an
unstable personality or someone who is floating away on dope.
But with a guy who enjoys a normal degree of mental health,
but just happens to have certain fears, you can pull off a very
satisfying game. The most common fears (phobias) are: fear
of the dark and its attendant fears of the unknown and of be-
ing alone; fear of height and falling (acrophobia); fear of
enclosure (claustrophobia); more rarely, fear of open space
(agoraphobia); and fear of some specific object or animal (like
snakes and creepy-crawlies). Of course, Freud maintained that
phobias do not exist if the vita sexualis is normal— an in-
teresting point, since I have seldom found an SM subject who
really had any phobias serious enough to be destructive or
harmful. The residual fears from childhood remain in many
of us, however, and are available to be used effectively. With
a more jaded M, it may be possible to jar him back to a more
intense participation by one of these ploys.
Let me relate a story told by a San Francisco friend of mine,
which may illustrate one of these fears in action, first utiliz-
ing a phobia and subsequently delving into an interesting bit
of public humiliation at its conclusion:

Jake had been coming to see me, off and on, for several
years. He lived in the east, but had business trips out here
two or three times a year. He was a good-looking dude,
though we'd both aged a bit since our first session. At
the time I'm talking about, he was just past forty, still very
handsome, with longish dark hair and a Pepsodent smile,
a little heavier than I would have liked him. In a suit, he
looked like a very proper, prosperous businessman.
We had always done fairly heavy things, especially with
whips and other torture devices. Lately, I had started to
272
be a little annoyed with him, though, because he was defi-
nitely jaded, and didn't respond like he used to: He'd also
started using more drugs than I liked, and on this particu-
lar visit he admitted after some questioning that he'd
dropped some acid.
You might remember that about this time I had just re-
wired part of the house, including the dungeon, and I'd
put in one of those security remote control light-switching
systems. I'd set it up in the dungeon so I could turn the
lights off and on from upstairs, but I'd left some of the
controls off it, including the plug for the stereo. It was
more convenient, because it saved my having to fumble
around in the dark to get enough light to keep from bump-
ing my head on something hanging from the ceiling.
Anyhow, Jake came that night, and I got started with
him, and things weren't going as well as they might. He
wasn't responsive enough, maybe because of the drugs,
although acid had usually worked differently on him. What
I had always liked especially about Jake was his response
to a very warm session. That is, after I'd worked him over
for a while he'd be hot as a pistol if I took him in my arms
and kissed him. This night, it didn't work that way, so I
decided to try a little experiment. I trussed him up really
good, using a suspension harness that held him in place,
vertically, with his feet just barely touching the floor. I
gagged him, but left his eyes free. I catheterized him,
stuck a butt plug up his ass, and ran a chain under his
wrists to pull his arms up, off his ass. I put a very trippy
electronic tape on the machine, and I walked out the door,
telling him not to go away.
I made sure to clump hard enough that he knew I'd gone
upstairs, and when I got there I waited a few minutes, then
hit the "off" switch on the dungeon lights. That left him
in the dark— pitch black, with just that weird music go-
ing. He couldn't move, or even cry out, and I'd already
mentioned that I'd been having trouble with rats getting
into the basement. I left him there for almost an hour. I
then debated for a few minutes, whether I should turn on
the lights from upstairs, or wait until I got down there. I
273
decided on the latter, so I turned off the light in the out-
side hall before I opened the dungeon door. He could
probably see me come in, but not much more. He had to
know it was me, of course, but I still went through a little
scenario for him, using the tip of a quirt to touch his legs
and feet. By the time I'd finished, he was squealing and
bouncing around in the harness.
I put on the lights and took the gag out. You never saw
anyone so happy to see someone in your life! He couldn't
move his arms to hug me, but when I took the catheter
out and made a hugging scene, he just melted into me
like he used to. I put him through a heavy punishment se-
quence, then, whipping his cock for not being hard, then
tanning his ass when he did get it up. He came while I
was strapping his butt, so I made him hang there until he
recovered, and worked him over with the quirt. I had one
of those "Y" pieces on him near the end, the kind with
a brass cockring at the bottom, then a leather-covered
elastic that went up to either tit with little toothed clamps
on the end.
When I finished with this, and took it off, I locked a steel
shackle around his cock and balls— the kind you can't get
off without the key, because it's lined with lamb's wool
and very snug. He's very well hung, anyway, with big balls
and a nice, thick cock. When I let him down, he hesitated
a long while before getting dressed, and finally asked me
if I was going to take the shackle off his nuts. I told him
I'd already mailed the key to him, at his home. He left with
it still in place, and he had to take a plane the next after-
no n.don't
I know how he got through the airport inspec-
tion point, but I'll bet he had an interesting time explain-
ing the "bong" from the metal detector. He never told me
exactly what happened, but about a week after our ses-
sion, the shackle, complete with key, arrived in the mail.
"Had you actually mailed him the key ahead of time?"
I asked.
"No, but I went out and did it that same night, right after
he left. It must have gotten to his house about the same
time he did."
274
CHAPTER TWELVE— Permanent piercings
and other bodily adornments

I acknowledge that we may be dealing with a slight contradic-

tion interms. To the real enthusiast, his piercings, etc., are more
than mere adornment. They render a very sensual pleasure,
not only during sex, but in the normal course of living and mov-
ing about. Other adornments, such as tattoos or a branding scar
(once it's healed) cause no particular physical sensation, and
therefore fall more precisely into the parameter of the chapter
title. But, for lack of a better catch all term, I'll stick to it.
The use of all these bodily adornments has become increas-
ingly popular over the last decade, and their open display more
commonplace. With the exception of branding, they are unlikely
to be done in the context of any kind of sex or SM scene. They
can also be fairly expensive, and, for this reason alone, reflect
a more considered decision on the part of the wearer.

Tattoos. There is some dispute among the aficionados as

to whether tattoos or bodily piercings enjoy the longest history.
Evidence from ancient cultures is difficult to come by, because

275
the tattooed bodies have long since withered away, and the
piercings, usually gold, have been stolen by grave robbers.
The most common historical indicators are ancient tomb
paintings or shards of pottery depicting one or another of
these practices. The most notable exception has been in
Egypt, where mummies dating back to about 2000 B.C. dis-
play tattoos. Other cultures and areas did not share the Egyp-
tians' elaborate burial rites, nor their dry climate, so the only
accurate records begin with the writings that have survived
from the more recent of the ancient societies. There is some
mention by classical writers of tattooing among the Thracians,
Greeks, Gauls (early French), German and English tribes dur-
ing the era of the Roman Empire. The Romans themselves
seem to have used tattoos only to identify slaves and
criminals.
When the Christians took over Europe, they forbade tattoo-
ing: "Thou shalt make no cutting in thy flesh on account of
the dead or tattoo any marks upon you..."— Lev. xix,28. (And
it was our old nemesis Leviticus which also termed homo-
sexuality an abomination, decreed that women should not
speak in public and should leave the company of men dur-
ing their periods, forbade the eating of pork, and required
all men to be circumcised!)
Strangely enough, the Chinese did not do much tattooing
until the 19th Century, unless the very ancient records have
been lost. The Oriental traditions come mostly from Japan,
where the practice has been widespread for a long time. Be-
cause tattoos do not show up well on a dark skin, it has never
been a popular practice in most of Africa, where the com-
mon practice was/is scarification (making ritual cuts in the
skin that are forced to heal so as to leave permanent scar
patterns). The most universal use of tattoos took place among
Native American tribes and in the South Pacific (Polynesia,
Micronesia), as well as in the far north among Siberian and
Alaskan Eskimos. The term "tattoo" came into the English
language from Tahiti, via the explorations of Captain James
Cook (1769).
At any rate, it is easy to see that the art has enjoyed a long
and widespread history within many cultures. After the "Age
276
of Exploration" (16th-17th Centuries) it became common for
American and English sailors to sport tattoos acquired in vari-
ous exotic ports. Later, during the 1880's and 1890's, there
was a brief tattooing vogue among upper class English peo-
ple, men and women, but this quickly died out, and became
something which "nice people" simply did not do (like eating
onions and garlic). Thus tattoos became associated with the
rougher, lower classes, and to some extent retain this aura
today. Like the wearing of tattered jeans or unpressed blue
work shirts, a tattoo conveys the macho image many men
wish to project.
With the patenting of the first electric tattooing implement
in the United States (1891) the process became easier and
"tattoo parlors" began to proliferate all over the western
world. However, the risk of superficial infection remained high,
and the use of a single, relatively expensive instrument in-
creased the danger of hepatitis, because the steel needles
lasted longer and could be used on more people. New York
City passed a very restrictive law in 1961 for this reason.
There is also some indication that tattooing increases the risk
of cancer. And, an improperly sterilized needle can transmit
the AIDS virus.
So, if you going to get a tattoo, have it done by a profes-
sional who uses the proper equipment and a sterile technique.
A professional is also more likely to execute a design you
find pleasing— important, because removing it is very difficult
and inevitably leaves a scar.
Within our own group, a tattoo has little meaning as regards
sexual practices or preferences. It represents more of an in-
dication that the person wearing it finds it attractive, and may
be attracted to another guy similarly decorated. (Of course,
if the guy has "fuck me" tattooed on his ass...) Japan is the
only place I know of where tattoos are really intended to send
specific sexual signals, perhaps because the communal bath-
house has been commonplace for a long time. A man with
a geisha girl on his back is probably heterosexual, whereas
one with a Samurai or other warrior is more likely to be gay.
Those with chrysanthemums or other flowers are often
bisexual.
277
 Recently my chief advisor in the area of bodily adornment
insisted that a tattoo on the penis would not last, due to the
skin's being too thin to properly hold the inks. I published
this assertion, and was promptly inundated with many ex-
ceptions, some accompanied by photographic evidence that
a tattoo can, indeed, be permanent on the penis. The ratio
of success, however, is not as high as on other parts of the
body. Exactly what a tattoo on the cock is telling you, I'm not
really sure. I have seen some quite graphic indicators en-
graved on various buttocks, the most interesting barely con-
cealed along the crease between upper thigh and ass (enter-
taining for the nurse who has to give such a guy a hospital
enema!).
A guy with a real affinity for tattoos will often find them
greatly enhanced by the addition of a permanent piercing.
For example, I have seen an eagle flying down the left pec,
its beak seeming to grab at a gold ring through the nipple.
In conclusion on the subject of tattoos, I might add that
however attractive they may be in the light, they do little good
in the dark, whereas an embedded piece of gold can be felt
by exploring fingers wherever this may occur.

Piercings. In discussing "permanent" piercings, I refer to

those types of applications where the artificial addition is in-
tended to remain in place indefinitely. This does not mean
that it cannot be removed, so in this sense it is not as per-
manent as a tattoo or a brand. Depending on the area of the
body and age of the piercing, the hole will generally disap-
pear once the ring or other artifact is removed. I am indebted,
incidentally, for much of the following information to the late
Doug Malloy, who kindly enlightened me in great detail shortly
before his untimely death.
As with tattooing, we find the earliest records of bodily pierc-
ing among the Egyptians. A heroic-sized statue of Pharaoh
Akhenaton (circa 1400 B.C.) shows the hole just above the
navel where the king obviously wore a gold ring (long since
removed by grave robbers), so we know that navel piercing
was practiced at least as early as the middle of Egypt's New
Kingdom, where it was considered a mark of royalty. During
278
the height of the Roman Empire (First Century, A.D.) nipple
piercings, frequently following ritualized contests, were dis-
played as a mark of rank by the centurians (roughly equivalent
to today's sergeant major, and the highest military status to
which the plebeian citizen could aspire). There is no evidence
of nipple piercings among the patricians, the Roman upper
crust.
Piercing the ear lobes, strictly a cosmetic operation, has
been common all over the world, and certainly dates back
far into prehistory. For our purposes, we might note that a
stud in the left or right lobe can indicate Top or bottom inter-
ests, much as a dangling set of keys or hankie in a back
pocket. Beautiful maybe, but erotic it is not, in my opinion,
and neither are belly rings.
Our examination of clearly erotic piercings should start in
ancient Rome, where, according to historians Strabo and Cel-
cius, infibulation was quite common among the patricians.
This practice is simply a means to defeat the function of the
genitalia (male or female), and it was a Roman practice to
make a pair of holes in the foreskin and padlock it shut. This
might be done by a Master to his favorite slave, or to a boy
who exhibited extraordinary talents in some artisitic or scien-
tific field, and whose parents hoped to stop him wasting his
energies on sex. It was even believed that infibulation could
prevent a boy's voice from changing, and the practice was
continued into the middle ages, when the Church wanted the
voices. It was only later that they started castrating boy
sopranos.
Strangely enough, infibulation really works. Stretching the
foreskin over the glans and creating pressure on the cock
prevents erection. Many schoolboys in the last part of the 19th
Century were thus prevented from having sex and "diluting
their energies." The practice was best documented in Swe-
den, and we know of cases right up to World War II. The only
such piercings that I know of in contemporary settings occur
within the Master-slave situation, where the Master is blessed
with an uncircumcised slave and wishes to assert his absolute
contol.
Circumcision and other forms of mutilation are common
279
rituals in many savage cultures, either at birth or puberty. This
may be part of the appeal to us of genital piercing, in that
having it done to yourself is a wild and exotic experience,
conjuring up images of barbarity and our less civilized past.
The sea Dyaks of Northern Borneo, for instance, put large
holes in the scrotum, and will carry heavy gold or brass
weights just for the joy of doing it, not to serve any particular
function. They also pierce the ears and stretch them to four
or five inches, using big plugs in the slots. They pierce
themselves almost every place except nipples or navel. They
nearly all have an ampallang, a horizontal piercing through
the head of the cock, crossing through the glans, supposed
to be a benefit for the female, who will feel the firmness dur-
ing intercourse.
An ampallang is one of the less common piercings for west-
ern men. (The first Americans to get them, as far as I know,
were guys exploring for oil in the Borneo area.) Aside from
the extremity of the measure and the longer healing period,
it is so intensely painful as to be almost impossible without
anesthetic, even if you can find a doctor willing to perform
the surgery. Placement is even more critical than with most
other piercings, because it has to be set through the flesh
above the urethra. A bar (usually gold) is inserted through
the hole, and small studs are screwed onto the ends. Once
it is healed and ready for use, the size of the studs can be
changed to suit the occasion. Although the ampallang osten-
sibly benefits the person getting fucked, it can also act like
the dydoe in restoring some of the sensation lost as a result
of circumcision.
The dydoe, a much more recent idea, is used almost ex-
clusively bycircumcised men. The piercing consists of a small
hole through the upper edge of the glans, and is most often
done in pairs, one on each side (not necessarily both at the
same time). A small ring or barbell stud is placed through
the hole. Placement is critical, because the proper stimula-
tion of nerve endings is the desired result, and the person
making the piercing must know what he is doing. This is one
example of a qualified lay person being able to do a better
job than an uninformed doctor, assuming all other antiseptic
280
precautions are equal. Healing is from four to six weeks, with
minimal discomfort.
Probably the most rewarding, certainly the most common
penile piercing is the Prince Albert (a reference to the place-
ment, not the ring itself). This is set on the underside of the
cockhead, entering through the urethra, then down through
the underside of the cock. Legend has it that Albert, Queen
Victoria's consort, had this done as Her Majesty was offended
by any suggestion of odor from her husband's uncircum-
cised cock, and the ring helped to hold the foreskin in a
retracted position. It is also called a "dressing ring," from
the Beau Brummell era of very tight pants, because it can
be attached to a thong and tied about the leg, thus ensuring
that the genitals lie smoothly down one or the other pants
leg. Want to try it under a pair of 501 's? Of all the piercings,
this is the one most guys like the best. The ring is small and
can stay in during any kind of sex without getting in the way.
It simply presses up, into the flesh of the cock. Its placement
is very erotic and stimulating. The "operation" is quick, and
with minimal pain. It also has a relatively short healing
period— four weeks or so. (I should note that the small rings
in use today would not have served the Prince Consort's
need; he must have had a rather large ring to hold back the
foreskin.)
The guiche is another very functional piercing whose name
applies to placement rather than to the ring itself. In fact, it
need not be a ring; a small "barbell" will work as well. This
piercing is through the loose skin behind the balls... between
the rear descent of the scrotum and the prostate gland. It was
named by the French settlers in Polynesia, and the word
means "an opening (in something)"; e.g. a wicket in a bank
is also called a guiche. In their balmy paradise, the natives
do not wear restrictive clothing. They like the breeze to come
up and caress the genitals (or did until the Christian mission-
aries came along and taught them the meaning of guilt.) The
guiche piercing is equidistant between both legs, and the
backside of the balls. ..set into a sort of triangle. Native boys
receive it at quite an early age, and may dangle small articles
from it, so that as they move about, the object strikes against
281
their legs or balls, constantly alerting them to their sexuality.
There is a bit of mystery to the native ceremony, and Doug
was unable to get the people to explain it all. However, he
described the piercing as being performed by a "desexed"
male called a Mahou, who was always bearded but spoke
in a whispery (almost "drag") voice, and who performed the
rite on both males and females. There is one such piercer
in each community in the Society Islands. Sexually, the
guiche is very functional, because a simple pressure on the
ring will start things going, whereas later in the act, tugging
on it will slow you down and extend orgasm for a longer
period. The people who wear it, of course, soon learn how
to get the best from it.
Another very practical and popular piercing is the frenum
ring. The frenum is the loose piece of skin on the underside
of the penis, just behind the head. The piercing is made side-
ways (i.e., at a 90 degree angle to the shaft), through this
outer skin. It originated in Europe, and could serve either for
sexual stimulation (with a thin gauge ring) or as a chastity
device, with a heavier padlock. It was even possible to pre-
vent masturbation by the use of a "Franey cage." This device
utilized the frenum piercing along with a second piercing at
the base of the penis, whereby an enclosing metal basket,
or case, was locked in place.
Inserting a fairly large diameter ring, made of small gauge
gold, can make this a very erotic and versatile piercing. The
ring can be swung upward and slipped over the head of the
cock to lie completely around it, just behind the head during
intercourse or whatever. In this position it is completely out
of the way, but still restricts circulation into the cockhead just
enough to act as a cockring does at the base of the penis.
At other times, the ring can hang loosely downward. Some
men even sleep with one finger through the ring, giving them
an erotic sensation and serving to enhance a "protective"
posture in regard to the genitals. Obviously, the ring size must
conform to the diameter of the erect penis to be optimally
functional.
Of other genital piercings, only two are really worth men-
tioning, although neither is as popular or functional as those
, 282
already covered. The apadravya, desribed in the Kama Sutra,
is similar to the ampallang, but is inserted vertically through
the head of the penis, or through the shaft behind the head,
instead of horizontally. It takes its name from the French noun
used to denote any of a variety of sexual stimulation devices,
ranging from "French ticklers" to dildos. Among the Dravidian
people of southern India, the word has come to be associated
with this particular piercing. Utilizing a "barbell" implant, it
causes increased sensation for both partners during
intercourse.
The other piercing we should mention is the Hafada, part
of the puberty rites of several Arab tribes in the Persian Gulf
area. A small gold or silver ring is inserted through the side
of the scrotum, between the testicle and the base of the penis.
It is supposed to prevent the testicles from ever rising back
into the body, thus ensuring that the youth is now and forever
a man. It is not a particularly erotic piercing, although it can
provide some stimulation if manipulated during a sexual
exchange.
If anyone reading this decides he would like to try a pierc-
ing, strongly
I recommend that he not try to do it to himself.
The placement of the inserts is very critical, if one expects
to get maximum sensation and enjoyment from them. Be-
cause genital piercings are visible to only a limited number
of people, their popularity is less than for nipple rings or bars.
Again, it is extremely important that these piercings be done
in the proper place on the body, that they be done sym-
metrical y iboth
f nipples are involved, and that proper an-
tiseptic precautions be taken. To return for a moment to
Doug's comments (which I tape recorded in a long discus-
sion one afternoon):
"Most guys, especially those into SM, who decide to have
their nipples pierced will generally start with one— left or right,
depending on their interests as Top or bottom. But they will
find the sensation so pleasurable they often come back to
have the other one done. Having that piece of metal through
one's nipple starts a sensitivity that the guy never realized
was there. Even under your shirt, it's a constant reminder
of your manhood. It's a beautiful feeling.
283
 "Usually, the decision to have a permanent piercing is a
planned thing... something a guy decides to have done, not
something thought about in the heat of passion. It is quite
simple if done by someone who knows what he's about, and
it's not particularly painful— no more so than having an ear
pierced, or taking a hypodermic injection. For that reason it
is generally done without anesthetic. A person who does this
professionally will have a little machine, similar to the device
they use to pierce ears in a jewelry store. Once the hole is
made, a small retaining bar is placed inside to keep it open
until it heals. This should always be a straight piece of metal,
as opposed to a ring, because the hole itself is straight across,
not curved. Gold is most commonly used, because it is com-
pletely inert, and will never corrode or give off salts that can
be harmful. Some guys prefer stainless steel, but I think the
original piercing should be gold, because there is no chance
of its reacting chemically. I'm not saying that I never heard
of an adverse reaction from stainless, but I don't know of any-
one using it initially."
So there you have a general rundown, with most of my in-
formation supplied by a man very much into the piercing
scene. Not everyone is so sold on the idea, and it has been
my experience that a person can get so carried away and
have so many piercings that his genitals resemble the display
of a Gypsy jewelry hawker. Unless he is playing with another
man into the same trip, his excessive rings and bangles can
be disconcerting, and can get in the way— of the sensibilities,
at least, of his partner. When an M comes to me with gold
rings through his tits, I usually make him take them out be-
cause love
I to work on the nipples, and the rings preclude
the use of some other instruments. Assuming he's had his
piercings for any length of time, it is no problem to put them
back afterward. It is not a good idea to hang too much weight
from a permanent piercing retainer, because you can damage
either the ring itself (which can be expensive), or by getting
really gross you can tear the skin. As to the cock piercings,
it all depends on how many and which ones. The Prince Albert
is rather innocuous, as is the guiche, because it is so far back
between the legs. However, if you are into a suspension
284
scene, where straps have to be fitted under the crotch and
assume the weight, the guiche should definitely come out.
If you want more information on piercings and the associ-
ated jewelry, I suggest you contact my friends at Gauntlet
Enterprises, P.O. Box 6981 1 , Los Angeles, CA 90069. They
can probably recommend someone in your area to do the
piercings, and can supply the materials. Their latest catalogue
has a wide range of nipple rings and bars: seamless rings,
rings with a bead joint, D rings, barbell retainers, etc. There
are probably other suppliers, but I am not familiar with them.
Whatever you do, don't try to pierce your own tits and fill them
with earrings. It just won't work, and can cause a terrible
infection.

Branding. The use of branding to identify livestock is an-

cient; just when men started doing it to each other is uncer-
tain. The ancient Greeks branded their slaves with a "delta"
(iordoulos, "slave"); the Romans branded robbers and run-
away slaves with an "F" (for fur, "thief", or "fugit'Ms"). Mine
workers or convicts sentenced to gladiatorial contests were
branded on the forehead for identification until the reign of
Constantine, when the law was changed so as not to disfigure
the face, and the brands were moved to the hand, arm or
calf. In medieval France, galley slaves were branded with a
"TF" (tranaux foces), the practice remaining on the books
until 1832. Although the Germans outlawed branding, the
English authorized it several times. The Statute of Vagabonds
(1547) commanded the branding of vagrants, gypsies and
brawlers— a large "V" on the breast for the first two categor-
ies, an "F" for "fray maker" on the latter. Runaway slaves
were branded on the cheek with an "S," but due to aboli-
tionist pressures this law was repealed in 1636. Up to the
18th Century, however, such offenses as counterfeiting
(coins) were punished with an "R" branded onto the right
cheek (R for "rogue"). From the reign of Henry VII until 1822,
branding was proper punishment for "crimes which received
benefit of clergy"; i.e., crimes rating less than a death penalty.
Between 1698 and 1707, English law called for someone con-
victed ofpetty theft to be "burnt in the most visible part of
285
the left cheek, nearest the nose." In America, we were a lit-
tle less barbaric; at least we stopped it sooner. Although
runaway slaves were commonly branded well into the 1 700's,
the practice was outlawed after the Revolution.
Simply because it has been one of the "cruel and unusual
punishments" of our early history, most western countries
now have laws on the book making it a crime to brand another
human being, so both the brander and the brandee should
be aware that this is one kinky practice where there may be
a very specific law prohibiting the behavior. Since our fore-
fathers never considered the possibility of a man wanting to
be branded, there are no exceptions for voluntary submis-
sion, although some guys have sought to indemnify the man
they wished to have brand them. None of these cases has
ever
react.been adjudicated, so I can't tell you how a judge would
Because it is permanent, painful, and requires at least a
minimal amount of equipment, the practice of branding is not
a common SM rite. It is, rather, one of those wonderful fan-
tasy images that many guys conjure up in a JO session and
promptly forget after the jism has flowed. It is also something
that can't happen often to you, simply because there isn't
enough skin to take all the impressions. But, as the high point
of a very heavy scene, the receiving of a brand may provide
one of your hottest SM experiences.
By the very nature of the activity, the guy who likes to do
the branding, and who has the equipment, is going to be
much more involved in the practice than the bottom who gets
it once or twice in total. In this sense, I would classify brand-
ing as a Topman's specialty. Or it may not be a specialty at
all— simply something a Master does to his slave, perhaps
a once in a lifetime experience for both of them.
Since fantasies of branding are no more rooted in fact than
any other, it might be interesting to examine one possible
setting: the Old West, where men commonly marked their
livestock with an identifying brand, and the resulting scar on
a steer or horse was universally recognized as a certain deter-
minant of ownership:
286
 Lance and I were stretched out on our bellies, watching
the trail from an outcropping of rock. The sun had just
slipped below the distant hills, and a soft violet afterglow
reflected off the dust and haze in the valley. My body still
ached and my skin was stiff from the unhealed cuts and
welts that covered my back, ass, and lower legs. Lance
was still so angry he hardly spoke, even to me, but I knew
his rage was directed toward someone else, so I didn't
say anything. I just lay there next to him, watching for
Hicks and his pair of stooges to appear from their hid-
den retreat.
For months, our neighbors had been plagued by these
men raiding their herds. They'd come down at night to
find a stray, or to cut a steer out from one of the small
groups that grazed in the sheltered maze of canyons and
arroyos on the southern edge of the valley. They'd hack
off a big chunk of meat, and leave the rest to rot. They
were outlaws, each with a modest price on his head, and
had been hiding out in the valley until things cooled down.
But as summer came on, whatever water they had must
have had dried up; we knew they made frequent trips to
the pond where they'd fill their canteens and sneak back
into the valley. The Rock Garden, we called it, because
nothing lived there except scrub and cactus. We knew
they hadn't been out, now, for almost a week. We'd been
watching.
Lance was sure they'd show up soon. They'd have to,
or die of thirst. They must also be running low on food,
although one of the stooges was an Indian, and he prob-
ably knew how to dry their stolen meat in the sun to make
it stay edible longer. Even so, they'd need water, and the
trail we watched was the only way out... unless they
wanted to climb over the craggy hills to either side; but
that would mean leaving their horses behind, and they
needed water, too. No, they'd come this way, Lance had
assured me. And they'd likely come tonight.
I glanced over at Lance, and he saw me looking at him.
He forced a smile and reached out to pat my shoulder with
one big, heavy hand. "It's going to be okay, kid," he said.
287
"We'll get the bastards tonight. ..or tomorrow... whenever
they come down, we'll be here."
He returned his gaze to the trail and the distant floor
of the valley, shifting his weight and moving a few inches
closer to me. I could feel his warmth, even now that the
sun was down and the ground was giving up its heat. I
thought how it felt when we shared the warmth of our
naked bodies in his bed roll, or in his big fourposter in
the cabin.
I'd been seventeen when he found me in town, broke
and wandering after my folks died on the trail to Califor-
nia. We'd come from Boston, looking for a better life in
the West. Only my parents had found hardship and death
at the hands of some renegades who'd raided our camp
one night... killed them and left me for dead... took every-
thing of value they could carry off. I'd stumbled into town
a few days later, and the people had given me something
to eat. The blacksmith had let me sleep in his barn, but
no one had really wanted me... not until Lance rode in for
supplies one day. We'd got to talking as Agnus, the
smithy, replaced a shoe on Lance's horse. What we really
said to each other had not been in our spoken words, but
each of us understood before we ever rode out of town
together, me hanging onto Lance's waist, my crotch
pressed against his slender butt on the saddle.
I guess there'd been some eyebrows raised when we
left that way. Lance was a big, well-built man in his early
thirties. The few single women in town all had eyes for
him, but he never tumbled any of them... lived alone on
his small spread until I came along to share it with him.
I guess people figured he didn't much care for women,
which was true enough. Although I was in pretty poor
shape when we met, I still looked good enough for a few
people to pick up on Lance's reason for taking me into
his care. I'd filled out some in the year we'd been to-
gether, and I guess my appearance only helped to make
our relationship move obvious. But western people
tended to mind their own business, although I'm sure they
gossiped and they must all have suspected what was
> 288
going on. I know they weren't overly friendly to me on
the few trips I'd made to town on my own. Lance said he
didn't care, and I guess I really didn't any more, either.
He'd come to love me, he said, and I know I felt the same
about him. There wasn't anything I wouldn't have done
for him, and that's how he was with me. That was also
why we were out on that rocky ledge, waiting for Hicks
to show up.
Two weeks before, Lance had sent me into town to pick
up a load of timber he'd ordered for a new barn we were
building. I was on my way back when I saw a stranger
poking around the old Barker place. Lance had told me
the Barkers had lived there about ten years back, but their
well had dried up and they'd moved on. There was more
to it than that, I guessed. They'd been dirt farmers, so
their place had been a homestead. Nobody had wanted
them there, and they probably didn't get any help from
their neighbors when their water supply got short.
Anyway, they were gone. Now there wasn't much left, ex-
cept the old gateposts out by the road, and the stones
they'd used as a foundation for their cabin. The rest of
the timber had been carted off by their former neighbors.
The strangers saw me, and yelled at me to stop. There
wasn't much I could do, because I was driving the wagon
with all that lumber on it. The man swung himself up onto
his saddle, and trotted up to me. I figured it had to be one
of the renegades, because I knew everyone else... every-
one who belonged in the area. But I pretended not to
suspect anything, just greeted him politely and tried to
keep the wagon moving. He took hold of the halter on the
nearest horse and stopped me. "Where'ya headed,
kid?"
"Donovan spread," I told him.
"Oh, you're Lance Donovan's boy. I've heard about
you."
I could tell by the sneering expression, what he'd heard,
and I tried to get the team moving again. I was wearing
a gun, like everybody did in these parts, but I wasn't very
good with it, so I didn't try to bluff him off.
289
 "Look, mister, I'm in a hurry," I protested, "I've got
to get back before dark, or Lance'll be out looking for
me."
"Won't be dark for another couple hours" he answered.
"Get down, I want 'a show 'ya something."
"I really can't mister..." I started, but he moved up to
the side of the wagon and grabbed the gun out of my hol-
ster, tossed it across the roadway and drew his own.
"Down!" he yelled. "Now!"
I climbed down, and stood next to his horse's head. He
was a big man, about forty, with a two-week growth of
black beard on his angular face. He was also dirty. I could
smell him, even up on his saddle like he was. He was hard
looking, and gaunt, with teeth stained yellow from chew-
ing tobacco. He just sat there, holding his six-gun pointed
at my head, grinning and rubbing his crotch. "Maybe I
oughta try a little'a what Lance's been gettin'," he
sneered. "Why don't you just shuck some of them duds,
kid?"
I hesitated, and he fired into the dust at my feet. "Now,
kid!" he yelled at me, "I want'a see if the rest of you
matches that pretty face."
Really scared now, and wishing I had tried to put up
a fight, I started to slip my shirt off, over my head. I was
just pulling off my second boot when his two friends rode
up from the arroyo behind the ruins of the old house.
They'd heard the shot and come to see if their boss was
in trouble. "Look what I got," he called to them.
The other men reined up, and the three of them stood
their horses in a semicircle around me, watching as Hicks
told me to keep stripping. One of the newcomers was an
Indian, dressed like a Comanchero with loose shirt and
pants, tied at the waist with a piece of rope. His black,
greasy hair was long and secured about his head by a
filthy, twisted red bandana. The other rider was young,
not much older than me, with light brown sideburns grow-
ing down the edges of his face... hardly any beard... sort
of dazed, dumb expression in his eyes.
"Well, Billy," said Hicks, "looks like you might get to
290
play the man for a change... got us some nice, fresh boy
ass."
Billy grinned stupidly, grunting in agreement with his
Master. The Indian said nothing, and no flicker of expres-
sion betrayed his feelings. I was down to my jeans by
then, and I didn't have anything on under them, because
I hadn't worn the long gray drawers that protected my
legs when I was going to be in the saddle all day. It had
been a relief not to have to wear them, but I knew that
as soon as I dropped my pants, and they saw that I was
naked underneath...
"Come on, we ain't got all day," Hicks called out. "Drop
them breeches!"
I unbuckled my belt and shoved the jeans down my
thighs, hopped on one leg, then the other to get them off.
"Looks like he was expecting us, huh, Hicks?" Billy
laughed, pointing at my lack of underpants. His voice was
deep and thick, probably matching his skull, I thought.
I stood there naked and shamed... and scared. My cock
had crawled up inside the foreskin, until it looked like I
was really a kid, except for the patch of blond hair around
its base. I wanted to reach down and pull it loose, so it
would hang like it should. But I knew that would bring
more derision. Instead, I just stood there, staring at the
ground and waiting for whatever Hicks decided to do with
me. From the corner of my eye, I saw the sun riding lower
on the horizon, but it was a good two hours before its
light would fade. There was no chance of Lance coming
to look for me before then. No one else lived on this road
anymore, so there was little possibility of anybody hap-
pening by. I was really on my own... alone, stripped bare,
and completely at the mercy of these outlaws.
Hicks pointed to the old gate, framing the remains of
a pathway leading to the ruins of the Barker house. "See
if that crossbeam's strong enough to hold him," he said
to the Indian. "If it is, we can start off my stringing him
up to that." The red man rode over to it, reached up and
pulled on the overhead beam, where the Barkers had once
displayed their name above the gate to their home.
291
"Good," grunted the Indian. "You," he said to me,
"come." He motioned me to him.
Reluctantly, I shuffled toward him, the rocks cutting into
my bare feet. He pulled the piece of rope from around his
waist and tied my hands together. Then he beckoned to
Billy, who dismounted and walked behind me. At the In-
dian's direction, he grabbed me around the waist and
lifted me while the Indian tossed the loose end of the rope
over the crossbeam. He hauled on it, pulling my hands
into contact with the wood, then tied it securely in place.
I grasped the wood, taking as much weight off the ropes
as possible. My strength was already failing as the Indian
dismounted and started binding my ankles to the vertical
supports on either side. When he finished, I was hang-
ing from the rickety old frame, my legs spread wide apart,
straining to maintain some grip with my hands. After a
while I couldn't hang on and ended up hanging painfully
from the weathered wood.
They had tied me with my back to the road, so I couldn't
see what Hicks was up to, although I tried to look back
over my shoulder. I could see some motion, but my first
hint of his intentions was when the buggy whip from the
wagon snapped across my back. I jumped in surprise,
which seemed to please him. He started, then, really
working me over. As I jerked and strained, screaming and
trying to avoid his blows, he cracked that whip expertly
all across my back and ass, worked his way down my legs,
even snapping it against the soles of my feet. The more
I struggled, the more it seemed to please him. I could hear
Billy giggling inanely behind me, while the Indian had
moved a few feet away and started a small fire. He was
busy skinning a rabbit that they had apparently shot in
the arroyo just before I arrived.
While Hicks continued to lacerate my back, Billy came
around in front of me. He had a fair-sized rock, with a
piece of rawhide tied around it. He took the loose end of
this and wrapped it around the top of my balls, tying it
in place with a slipknot. Then he stood back and laughed
as my struggles against the whip made the rock swing
292
and bounce. He took hold of my cock in a callused hand
and masturbated it, forcing the foreskin back so sharply
he almost tore it. But the pain from my bindings and from
the endless whipping were so intense, I might have ig-
nored him except that he was directly in front of me, and
I couldn't avoid watching him. He picked up a couple of
sharp pebbles and held them against my cockhead while
he pulled the foreskin back in place. He then squeezed
and pulled on me, adding a further torment to the rest
of my agony.
Hicks finally tired of his sport and tossed the whip
aside. "Let's get him down low enough to do us more
good," he said.
The two of them.. .Hicks and Billy, both got on their
horses and rode up on either side of me. They untied my
hands from the wood, and let me fall forward, each of
them grasping one wrist. When my upper body was about
level with my feet, they let go. I fell the rest of the way,
barely able to get my hands under me in time to keep from
smashing my face into the sandy ground. The rock, tied
to my balls, slammed against my body, and I sprained one
wrist in the effort to protect myself. My hands were still
tied together, and my ankles were still secured to the up-
rights, so my body sloped awkwardly, suspended and
sagging until the strength in my arms gave way, and I just
hung there at an angle, one side of my face against the
grit. Fortunately, my legs had not quite reached the posts
on either side, so there had been a few inches of rope
separating me from the wood. Otherwise, the fall would
surely have broken both legs.
As it was, my ass was about three feet off the ground
or, as Hicks remarked, right at crotch level. He stepped
between my wide-spread legs, and shoved his thumb up
my ass. I jerked away from him, but he reached down and
grabbed my balls, pulling and squeezing until it felt as
if he were about to crush them. "Hold still, pretty boy,"
he snarled, "or you'll really end up a woman." He kept
playing at my asshole with one hand, while he opened
his pants with the other. I heard him spit a couple of times,
293
and tensed for the assault I knew was coming. He worked
a little moisture into my hole, and immediately shoved
the length of his dick into me. I couldn't suppress a
scream, as pain engulfed me and I almost passed out. He
was big, maybe as big as Lance, but he wasn't taking any
care how he rammed himself inside me. Without even
thinking about it, I was trying to roll from side to side,
but he now held onto my hips and seemed to enjoy the
motion. There was no way I could get away from him.
As he continued to fuck me, and I started to relax a lit-
tle, so it didn't hurt too bad, Billy walked around to stand
in front of me. I couldn't really see him, because I was
intent on trying to hold myself in place and to keep my
face off the grit. At first, I just saw the scuffed leather
of his boots, and knew he was doing something with his
hands. Suddenly, a warm flood of moisture gushed across
my shoulders and soaked my hair. He was pissing on me,
laughing as he did it. Hicks was still pounding away at
my backside, starting to gasp as his passions rose to a
climax. I tried to shake the stinging fluid from my eyes,
responding most of all to the terrible pain in my ankles.
When Hicks finally finished, Billy took his place. My
body ached in every hidden recess, and my ankles were
so raw and sore I was sure the bones must be sticking
out. Although Billy was built much smaller than Hicks,
his assault was even more painful, because he kept strik-
ing the side of my asshole with his hard little prong, jab-
bing at me and squealing like a pig in rut. Then he started
laughing, grabbing my cock and balls in both hands and
whooping about riding a wild bronc. As he neared his fin-
ish he used my balls to hold me in position until he shot
his load, grunting and moaning, finally falling on top of
me with his full weight adding to the pressure on my legs
and ankles.
My feet felt like they were ready to fall off by the time
he finally got up, and I heaved a sigh of relief to be left
alone for a moment. I expected the Indian would now take
his turn, but no one came near me for several minutes.
I moved my head enough to see that the three of them
294
were standing around the fire, tearing at the charred bits
of rabbit. The Indian was telling Hicks something, but he
wasn't speaking English, and I couldn't understand him.
Hicks laughed, looking back at me. "Right about here,"
he said, walking over and placing his hand on my right
ass cheek.
The Indian went to the wagon and got my shirt. Com-
ing back, he used it to pick up an old, rusty branding iron
from the fire. "Tomas found that down by the old house,"
Hicks explained. "Thought it'd look nice on ya." He stood
back and I watched in horror as the savage came toward
me with the glowing iron.
"No! Jesus Christ, man!" I shouted. "You do that, and
Lance'll kill you!"
"Lance won't never get a chance," Billy smirked. "He's
gotta catch us first."
At that moment, the red hot iron touched my ass, and
my whole body convulsed in a spasm of pain. I had never
felt anything equal to it. The fire seared into me, seemed
to penetrate the skin and muscle, and scorch me right
down to the bone. I shrieked and thrashed about on the
ground, my fingers clawing the soil as the stench of burn-
ing flesh.. .my flesh, wafted down to me.
When the Indian finally withdrew the iron, one of
them— Hicks, I think— pissed on my ass, soaking the raw
flesh where the iron had left its mark. The Indian tossed
his instrument aside, and took his turn invading my ass-
hole. But I was hardly aware of him, just the pain from
the brand, emphasized every time he touched it in the
course of his abuse. While he pumped and huffed above
me, I could see Billy on his knees in front of Hicks, flag-
ging the bigger man's cock with his mouth and taking his
second load while the Indian gave me his.
Then, all very pleased with themselves, they mounted
up and rode away, although the Indian paused long
enough to slash the ropes on one of my ankles before
he galloped off to join the others. I had managed to free
myself, but was still lying on the ground in fluctuating
spasms of pain when Lance finally found me. He was
295
afraid I was going to lose a foot, because of the damage
from the bindings, but it began to heal eventually. It was
the brand that bothered me, and I knew it bothered Lance.
There was no way to remove it, and I'd have it for the rest
of my life.
The Barkers had used a simple "B" brand, and as I be-
gan to recover enough to do some thinking, I realized that
Lance's "LD" was not so different since the "L" was el-
evated so the horizontal part of the letter cut through the
center of the "D." I'd asked him about the possibility,
and he had stared at me in disbelief.
"You mean you'd be willing to go through that pain
again, just to change the shape of the brand?" he asked.
"Your brand, from your hands... yes, I would," I assured
him.
"We'll think about it," he told me. "First, we've gotta
take care of Hicks and his stooges."
Lying there next to Lance, I could still feel the outline
of the "B" branded on my ass, and as I started to think
about the pain involved in changing it, I also pictured my-
self lying naked in the glow of the fire, and of Lance hold-
ing the iron in his hand, looking down at me. I started to
feel a growing surge of heat in my groin, knew my cock
was starting to lengthen down the leg of my jeans. Beside
me, Lance tensed. "Something moved down there," he
whispered, and we both turned our attention toward the
far end of the pass.

296
CHAPTER THIRTEEN— Drugs, booze and
health
Anyone familiar with my writings knows I am not big on the
use of drugs, and generally do not recommend them. A guy
who is really turned on to sex (or whatever) does not need
drugs or booze, or any other artificial crutch— which is ex-
actly what you are using when you turn to chemicals to carry
you through. I am also aware that some drugs make you feel
the way you think you should feel, or the way you want to
feel, in some particular situation. For some guys there is no
other way to achieve this sensation, because they have never
learned to do it with their own minds and bodies. Drugs can
also numb certain sensations, whether these be the pain re-
ceptors inthe body or the culturally conditioned inhibitions
of the mind. For people unable to perform on their own, the
drugs become essential. Unfortunately, the more you use
them, the more dependent you become, until eventually you
can't function without them.
I am less concerned with the legal restrictions and penalties
than with the effects of the drugs themselves. We have re-
sponsibilities toourselves and to other people: please keep
this in mind as you peruse the following list, and if you do use

297
drugs, at least use them in moderation and with a modicum
of common sense. Remember, heavy use of any of them (just
like alcohol and tobacco) is going to produce a psychological,
if not physical, dependency.
Because some of the health problems I want to discuss
are related to drug usage, I would like to make a fairly careful
survey of the most popular materials in common use, then
go on to the various other problems that seem to plague our
community. For some of the following material, I would like
to acknowledge the help and advice of the GMSMA (Gay Male
S/M Activists, 132 W 24th Street, New York, NY 1001 1). This
is a fairly large organization, devoted to the education of guys
who are into SM behavior, with the teaching of safety and
enjoyment their primary goals. They have been helpful to me
in preparing other parts of this book, as well, and I would re-
commend your getting in touch with them if you live in the
NYC area.
Okay, on to the drugs. Let's start with the most familiar,
and go from there to the more esoteric:

Alcohol. Certainly the most universally used drug, alcohol

tends to relax both body and mind, because of its depres-
sant effect on the central nervous system. In many it produces
euphoria, a sense of well-being, but also tends to blunt the
reflexes and make one less alert. In some people the "high"
or elevated "good feelings" quickly give way to moodiness,
hostility and depression. Prolonged and heavy use will ad-
versely affect the brain and liver, as well as the entire nerv-
ous and circulatory systems. Some recent research suggests
that regular, moderate usage can prolong life, but this is
controversial. Beer, the most frequently used alcoholic
beverage in an SM situation, gives the maximum fluid with
a lower alcoholic content, and is therefore favored in scenes
where urination is a desired factor. Alcoholism is too well-
known an affliction to require discussion in this context, but
its very wide incidence should remind us that alcohol is a very
addicting drug.

Marijuana. Commonly referred to as "grass," "pot,"

298
"weed," or just plain "dope," this is the most popular of the
substances we normally think of as drugs. Its active ingre-
dient, THC (delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol), is derived from the
Indian hemp plant; it can also be artificially produced. Al-
though usually smoked in a cigarette or pipe, it can be eaten,
often being baked into cake or brownies, or mixed with some
other sweet substance. Smoking marijuana produces a more
controllable reaction, in that the effects are fairly quick to ap-
pear and the user can increase or halt his intake accordingly.
Eaten, it may take up to an hour for the full impact to be ap-
parent, bywhich time it is too late to back off. Marijuana is
considered a mild hallucinogenic, but that term is relative;
for some, it can literally "knock a guy on his ass." Like al-
cohol, itends
t to be a depressant, producing a relaxation of
the mind and body, with the same sort of intoxication symp-
toms as booze: a "mellow" feeling of euphoria, loss of motor
coordination, dizziness, lightheadedness, etc. However, it
also tends to distort the perceptions in a different way, such
as allowing one to see more intense colors, or to hear music
through a seemingly different medium. It may cause a dry
throat and "cotton mouth," as well as a sensation of hunger.
Fairly heavy use of marijuana leaves a residue of THC in
the fatty tissues of the body, including the brain, which can
take up to two weeks to eliminate. Although marijuana is not
physically addicting in the sense of setting up severe tissue
needs, it can lead to psychological dependence. It is sus-
pected ofaffecting the immune system of the body, and thus
could be a contributor to the increase of "gay diseases." It
also interferes with the production of the genetic "trigger"
substance, DNA, but the exact effects of this have not yet
been clinically proven. It is not a sexual stimulant, although
it may tend to lessen inhibitions and dull pain. It is illegal in
most jurisdictions, and possession can result in serious
consequences.
Although the same laws apply to raising the plants (some-
times with more severe penalties for "cultivation"), many peo-
ple grow a bit on their sundecks, or with Gro-lux lamps in
basements or closets. The plant is allowed to grow until it
flowers, then it is pulled up by the roots and hung upside
299
down to permit the sap (containing the THC) to drain back
into the leaves, which are then harvested, dried, and used.
Hashish ("hash"), Thai sticks, and any number of other varia-
tions are all forms of marijuana, and the active ingredient is
the same, except that hash tends to have a stronger concen-
tration, and is usually derived from a plant slightly different
from the most common marijuana strain. The real connois-
seur can often identify the difference between "home grown,"
"Jamaica Gold," "Colombia," "Hawaiian," etc. I've seen
them go at it as if they were tasting wine, until they got too
stoned to care.

MDA. This has become an extremely popular drug, and

many experienced users consider it the safest, or at least the
most manageable, in that it seldom produces a "bad trip"
the way acid or some stronger hallucinogenic can. Chemically
it is "3, 4-methylenedioxyamphetamine," an amphetamine
related substance with a psychedelic effect similar to mari-
juana or mescaline. It comes in a white powder that has prob-
ably been made in a secret, illegal laboratory. Its most notice-
able physical effects are to increase the pulse rate and blood
pressure, dilate the pupils and suppress the appetite. I've
known it to put a few guys to sleep, because it relaxes body
and mind. It is favored by many SM beginners, because it
seems to have a pleasant, tranquilizing effect, producing a
sense of tenderness and empathy, even joy, but is sometimes
slow in producing an observable reaction. I have known guys
to take it half an hour before a scene, and not really feel any-
thing until near the end. Once the drug starts to take effect,
it usually peaks in about two hours, and may last up to eight
or nine. It can cause nausea shortly after being ingested. Al-
though itdoes increase your visual acuity, in that you see
things more brightly and with a seemingly sharper focus, it
does tend to slow down your reflexes and should definitely
not be used if you are going to drive a car two or three hours
later. It seems to be favored more heavily by gay people and
young hets than any other group.

LSD. Lysergic acid diethylamide ("acid" for short), al-

, 300
though much less popular than it was a few years ago, it is
still the most powerful hallucinogen we know, and has the
undesirable quality of producing different reactions depend-
ing on the psychological, emotional, or physical condition of
the person when he takes it. It can also cause a flashback
reaction: the body can store the chemical for several days
and suddenly release it unexpectedly. I like the GMSMA
analysis: psychotomimetic (mimics psychosis); odorless,
tasteless liquid or white powder. . . causes loss of ability to
perceive and analyze data in a structured manner; intensifies
and distorts sensory perception, including synesthesia (sen-
sory crossover; e.g., seeing sounds); eidetic images (those
seen with the eyes closed, often in a "movie style") and track-
ing (sequential "still" images; of an object in motion); deper-
sonalization, often with loss of sensation of body boundaries;
derealization, including complete detachment from reality;
disorientatbn; space and time distortion; increased sweating,
blood pressure, pulse rate, temperature, and respiration;
dilated pupils; decreased appetite; euphoria; illusions; delu-
sions; may cause excitation, anxiety, panic, and hyperactivity;
irrational, often dangerous behavior; depression; rambling
speech; nausea/vomiting. . .irreversible psychosis.
Acid, originally developed for medical purposes, is a dan-
gerous, tricky drug even in its properly manufactured form.
On the street you really do not know what you are getting.
If you decide to try it, make sure you have someone with you
who is not taking it, and who can help you if you have a "bad
trip." Try a light dose (half a tab) first to get some idea of
the sensation. Do not take it for the first time when you are
especially depleted, either physically or emotionally. Acid is
not classified as addicting, but prolonged use can cause tre-
mendous psychological problems, especially if you are a bit
unstable to start with.

Mescaline. This old standby drug, used by Indians (South-

western United States and Mexico) for centuries, is a natural
extract of the peyote cactus. The plant material looks like
brown dust; the artificially produced substance looks like
crystallized salt. The chemical name is "3,4,5-trimethoxy-
301
phenylethylamine," although the stuff you buy on the street
is probably not really mescaline. It will usually contain LSD,
PCP, amphetamines or other substances added to produce
an effect similar to the real thing. The visible reactions to
mescaline are quite similar to marijuana— one hit generally
being equal to about three good joints. It does not seem to
impair the judgment or overall intellectual functioning, and
in this respect tends to be less hazardous than many other
drugs. The effects are not long lasting or recurrent; it is not
considered addicting.

PCP. Commonly referred to on the street as "Angel Dust,"

this is the most dangerous and unpredictable drug in the
whole spectrum. Chemical name: phencyclidine; originally
developed as an animal tranquilizer, it has since been
deemed so hazardous that it is no longer manufactured legit-
imately, thus adding to the risk when buying it on the street.
It has all the hallucinogenic characteristics of acid, plus the
tendency to give the user enormous delusions of power. Be-
cause itcompletely obliterates the pain sensors, there are
many instances of people performing herculean feats of
strength, only to suffer serious physical trauma later. The drug
has such a bad reputation that in a number of police shootings
where circumstances might otherwise have been question-
able, autopsy findings of "trace amounts of PCP" have re-
sulted inautomatic exoneration of the officers. I suspect that
in many of these cases the victim had not knowingly ingested
PCP, but had thought he was purchasing some other sub-
stance. Fortunately, PCP is not one of the "fashionable"
drugs in most gay circles. Even Penishead, who will swallow,
smoke, shoot, or otherwise take almost any drug, is afraid
of this one. PCP is usually supplied as a white powder, some-
times as a liquid. It can be mixed with marijuana and smoked,
or combined with food or drink. I haven't heard of anyone
shooting it, but I suppose they can. Because PCP can be re-
tained for a long period in the fatty tissues of the brain
(GMSMA claims up to three years), severe and unexpected
flashbacks may occur. My strong (strongest) suggestion re-
garding PCP is: If you are going to experiment with drugs,
it's your ass. But leave this one alone!
302
 Cocaine. Chemical name: cocaine hydrochloride, com-
monly referred to as "coke." The most popular "recreational
drug" in the United States, as well as the most expensive.
The fine white powder can be "snorted" (sniffed into the nose,
usually through a straw), smoked, or rubbed onto any of the
mucous membranes (tongue, gums, rectum) or onto the geni-
tals. Some people have gotten very sophisticated in the
methods used for diluting coke. It is sometimes mixed with
procaine or other anesthetics, with amphetamines, caffeine,
quinine, or sugar. "Freebasing" produces a cocaine sulfate
paste— a volatile and dangerous substance until the transient
elements have evaporated in the process of making it. It has
the same physical effects as most of the other popular drugs,
in that it shrinks the blood vessels, tends to raise the blood
pressure and temperature, dilates the pupils, etc. Although
it has a relatively short-lasting effect, it can create a sense
of euphoria and a long-lasting, sometimes painful erection.
It also tends to make people more talkative and less inhibited.
Because it is so widely used by people who only indulge oc-
casional y, appears
it to have no permanent ill effects. And
for the very casual user, this may be true. In prolonged usage,
the physical effects (mostly nasal damage from snorting) are
secondary to the problem of psychological and tissue
dependence. The more you use, the more it takes to satisfy
you. Cocaine can be addicting, and because of its is high
cost it can become a $10,000 per month habit. I guess that's
known as "paying the piper."

Nitrous Oxide. This is "laughing gas," which dentists used

to use to knock you out long enough to pull a tooth. It smells
like ether, and has a sweet, burning taste. Little canisters of
it are sold by restaurant supply houses for use in whipped
cream dispensers. Some guys use it in conjunction with, or
instead of, amyl, because it causes the same giddy, dizzy
sensation. In SM use, it tends to reduce the sensation of pain,
or at least make one less concerned about it. Because it is
an anesthetic, one has to be careful to inhale just the right
amount to produce the desired effects without knocking
oneself out. Its dangers are possible liver damage from pro-
303
longed usage, or brain damage due to lack of oxygen. It can
depress the function of bone marrow, which produces the
red blood cells, and it is suspected of adversely affecting the
immune system. (See my discussion below on amyl nitrite.)
This is one of Penishead's favorite drugs, because it is cheap
and easy to get. I've seen him sit with his balloon inhaler,
filling the rubber ball from the canister, then inhaling the
fumes as the balloon deflates into his mouth, laughing like
a jackass and growing steadily dippier by the minute.

Amphetamines. These are normally called "uppers" or

"speed," and are usually commercially produced pills or tab-
lets, swallowed with liquid, or slightly diluted and shot into
the arm with a needle. As the street names imply, they cause
a heightening in bodily tension and mental activity, and come
in any number of strengths and varieties— from "diet pills"
to suppress the appetite, to "stay awake pills" to keep you
going long after you should have fallen asleep. Although they
result in a high energy level shortly after they are taken, they
produce the opposite effect as they begin to wear off several
hours later. In general, the other effects are: decreased ap-
petite, increased self-esteem, and a high energy level. They
increase the blood pressure, pulse rate, and respiration.
Heavy use can cause delusions and hallucinations, anxiety
in some people. I have found a lack of sexual ability on the
part of some users, but others find speed affects them in the
opposite way. Actually, because of the many varieties of up-
pers, and because of variations in bodily chemistry, the reac-
tions can be very different from one person to another.
Methadrine, or "crystal" as it is often called on the street,
seems to create what one of my user friends likes to call a
high "depravity level," in that some people become very sex-
ual: "like a bitch in heat" with a heavy dose (8 or 9 tabs, shot
intravenously). Preluden also falls into this category. Natu-
rally, using it this way is dangerous, and could kill you if your
body has not built up a resistance. In this sense, uppers are
a class of drugs from which the more experienced user
derives the greatest "benefit," because his body is able to
tolerate more of the substance, and is hence capable of
3C4
achieving its maximum effect. Unfortunately, by the time you
reach this stage, you're "hooked." On the Drug Enforcement
Administration list, most amphetamines are "Schedule II,"
but methadrine is "Schedule I."

Barbiturates. These are downers in street terminology, and

include such drugs as Seconal, Nembutol, and others nor-
mally taken as sleeping pills. They used to be called "reds,"
because the most popular, Seconal, came in a small red cap-
sule. Phenobarbitol would also fall into this group, although
it is not a sleeping pill. The reason these drugs are so dan-
gerous isperfectly obvious, since an overdose is one of the
most common methods of suicide. Normally, ten pills/cap-
sules ofany one of this class is considered lethal. Barbiturates
are highly addictive, and the "cure" is very unpleasant, with
a difficult withdrawal period. The effects of the drug are op-
posite to the uppers; depression of the central nervous sys-
tem, decrease in pulse rate, blood pressure and respiration;
constriction of the pupils. The muscles relax to a point of los-
ing coordination. The user may become hostile and violent.
His memory and attention span will be affected, and his be-
havior may become irrational. On the street, it is not uncom-
mon to find people using uppers and downers in combina-
tion with each other and with other drugs, to produce
whatever peculiar sensation the person has previously ex-
periencedadmit
.I that this is the one type of drug usage I
cannot understand. On the few occasions in my life when I
have been given one of these pills by a doctor, it put me to
sleep so fast I could not have gotten any other benefit from
it. The street use is one that has to be built up over a period
of time, with the end result that the user is thoroughly ad-
dicted before he reaches the stage where he can really en-
joy it.

Valium. This is a moderate strength tranquilizer, generic

name diaxepan. Valium, and Librium, a weaker predecessor,
came along in the sixties, and were hailed as a new break-
through inthe medical treatment of anxiety. They depress
the central nervous system, relax the muscles, and create
305
a mildly euphoric state. They are probably the least dan-
gerous ofthe drugs discussed, since addiction is rare, requir-
ing along usage of 1 50 to 500 mg. per day, and a lethal over-
dose isalmost impossible. I sometimes suggest that a begin-
ner ask his doctor to prescribe one of these drugs, taking one
before his first scene to blunt the effects of his normal fear,
without causing side effects other than possible drowsiness.
Once over this hurdle, however, I see little reason for con-
tinued use.

Quaalude Commonly referred to as "ludes," these pills

are extremely popular among the drug set. The generic name
is methaqualone. Unlike the earlier tranquilizers, Quaaludes
can do a lot of harm if misused, and it is not difficult to OD
on them. They do seem to increase sexual desire, although
they can also inhibit performance. The user becomes relaxed
and calm, sometimes drowsy, with a state of mellow euphoria
and increased self-confidence, and a raised pain threshold.
The drug does tend to diminish memory, including recollec-
tion of how many pills have been swallowed. One tablet a
day for four days will produce a greater tolerance for the drug,
but this dosage will produce dependence after a couple of
weeks. As few as eight tablets can produce coma and death,
caused by heart failure and inhibited breathing. Penishead
claims that this is one of the drugs that allows him to become
the complete and perfect bottom in a fistfucking scene, able
to take whatever the guy has to give. The next day, of course,
he looks like something the cat dragged in, but he has his
memories, vague and fuzzy though they may be. A good
friend of mine, who is an avid collector of porn, was lying on
the sand at Jones Beach one afternoon, when a hippie type
approached him and asked: "Do you want to buy some
ludes?" My friend's response was: "Color or black and
white?" I guess there's hope for us, yet.

Amyl Nitrite. I have saved this one for last, because many
guys who would not take anything they perceive as "dope"
do use amyl. Commonly referred to as "poppers" or "sniff,"
amyl is certainly the most widely used recreational drug in

306
the gay scene. It used to be sold without prescription for heart
patients: the little capsules were broken under the nose and
the fumes inhaled to counteract the congestion of blood ves-
sels leading from the heart (hence the name "popper"). Amyl
(isoamyl nitrite) was discovered by "recreational" users back
in the 1950's, and was promptly put on the "prescription re-
quired" list. It was not long before various businesses sprang
up to fill the void with butyl nitrite (isobutyl nitrite) products
such as "Rush" and "Locker Room" and many others, all
sold as "liquid incense" or "room odorizers." As such, they
remain legal in many jurisdictions. The desirable effects from
amyl/butyl are caused by the drug's relaxing the arterial walls,
including the meningeal arteries over the brain surface, de-
creasing the blood pressure and giving the user the sensa-
tion of suspended time, with a lengthening and strengthen-
ing of the orgasm. It also tends to generally relax the body,
and to give a short term hallucinogenic effect, with a "rush"
or warm, floating sensation. Immediately after inhaling, the
user can tolerate more pain than normal, and the induced
dizziness after a number of "hits" over perhaps an hour's
time creates a pleasant, glowing inner warmth that helps
achieve a greater degree of sensual satisfaction.
Except that some people got headaches, particularly from
butyl, for a long time no one could really point to any harm
from this drug, other than its tendency to interfere with the
production of hemoglobin (the substance in the blood which
carries oxygen to the cells of the body) in cases of very heavy,
extended usage. Now, however, we are beginning to see evi-
dence that heavy use can inhibit the body's immune system.
Exactly how much amyl it takes to do this, or if it only occurs
when amyl has been used in conjunction with other drugs,
is uncertain. Still, it now appears that amyl can contribute
to a situation where the body is susceptible to infection by
certain viruses that would normally be thrown off with no dire
consequences — think "AIDS."

I think the above is a fairly complete coverage of the "re-

creational" drugs in common use by our community, and by
many people throughout the western world. As you could

307
doubtless tell, I found more to fear than to recommend in the
use of most drugs. While I try not to put down anyone else's
scene, I simply can not emphasize too strongly that the heavy
use of any drug is dangerous. Any of them can create a
psychological dependence, if not an actual addiction, and
when the heavy user finally realizes that he is damaging nis
life by constantly ingesting these chemicals, he will gener-
ally find it very difficult to free himself. If you are determined
to try, I can only suggest that you do it in small quantities,
and that you vary your usage so as not to become depend-
ent on any one substance. Moderation has to be your watch-
word to avoid the snake pit.
Now, having scared the shit out of you over drugs, let's
go on to the diseases that have come to afflict our commu-
nity. think
I we are all aware that sexually active people,
especially those with a wide variety of partners, are suscep-
tible to a number of "sexually transmitted" maladies.
Because of the current panic over AIDS, many people are
no longer as aware of these older threats. So, I will start with
the common ones, of which some people are surprisingly ig-
norant: because they know they ought to know, they are em-
bar as ed toask.

Syphilis. The very word strikes a chord of fear in most peo-

ple, and the first sign of the disease usually sends one scurry-
ing off to the doctor or clinic. Unfortunately, some people do
not react this quickly, either because the symptoms are not
very pronounced, or because the guy thinks "it couldn't hap-
pen to me." Whether or not you ever have any visible symp-
toms, ifyou're sexually active you should have a blood test
every six months, at least. The symptoms of syphilis are
usually a small sore (chancre) in the mouth or on the genitals,
sometimes so small and insignificant that it goes unnoticed
until the disease reaches its second stage, when skin erup-
tions, general loss of energy, sore throat, headache, or vague
pain in the bones or joints are often not enough to alert the
really stubbornly resistant, or the person who doesn't believe
he can ever get VD— or the rare individual who simply doesn't
care. The long-term complications of syphilis include heart

. 308
disease, deterioration of the brain and central nervous sys-
tem, or problems with almost any other internal organ. Syphi-
lis iseasy to cure— just a few shots of antibiotic, and a cou-
ple of follow-up tests to make sure the microbes have been
destroyed. Never be embarrassed to go to a doctor or clinic:
the disease is so common, no one is going to be upset or
surprised, except you. It's far better to go in on your own and
have it taken care of than to get a call from the Health Depart-
ment because you've infected someone else.

Gonorrhea. Often referred to as "getting the clap" or "a

dose," the usual symptoms are a discharge (pus) from the
penis and a burning sensation during urination. The symp-
toms may be slight, but have them checked if you suspect
any problem. This disease has recently become more serious
because certain strains have developed a resistance to the
antibiotics commonly used to treat them. The real danger with
gonorrhea is that it can get into your internal organs, caus-
ing serious problems. I remember Penishead complaining of
pains all up his left side, until finally he went to the emer-
gency clinic, where they discovered gonococcus infections
in every organ from his left nut to just below the heart. God
knows how many people he had infected! I know another
fellow in his fifties who suffers from chronic arthritis as a result
of repeated infections and inadequate treatment in his
younger days. Because the lining of the rectum is the same
type tissue as the inside of the cock, you can get gonorrhea
from being fucked in the ass. Anal itching may be the only
symptom you notice: have it checked. In SM water sports,
avoid contact with the eyes, since urine can carry the
gonococcus and infection can result in permanent blindness.

Hepatitis. This serious liver infection is the disease I always

feared the most of the "old maladies," because it can be so
long lasting, difficult to cure, expensive, and can leave ter-
rible aftereffects. Two types of hepatitis concern us here. Type
"B" serum hepatitis, so called because it is carried in blood
serum, is not particularly prevalent except among junkies,
and it is not difficult to take the necessary precautions to avoid
309
it. It is usually transmitted by a hypodermic needle used on
more than one person, or by a transfusion of contaminated
blood. But it can also come out of an SM scene if anything
that penetrates the skin is used without being properly steri-
lized, or via an open sore, especially, in the mouth. In my
section on piercing, I made a point of stressing the need for
hygiene. Nothing, even down to a pin-prick cock toy, that
penetrates the skin of one person, should ever be used on
another.
Far more frightening and common within our community
is infectious hepatitis, "Type A," usually associated with poor
hygiene and unsanitary disposal of wastes; the disease that
health authorities are trying to suppress when they require
restaurant employees to wash their hands after going to the
toilet. Obviously, certain sexual practices are open invitations
to infection. Infectious hepatitis (also termed catarrhal jaun-
dice) isan inflammation of the liver, caused by a virus. The
most common source of the virus is the bowels and rectum.
An otherwise perfectly healthy person can carry the virus
(either Type A or B) and infect others without himself becom-
ing sick. There is usually an incubation period of 15 to 30
days between exposure and the onset of the first symptoms.
Although we think of hepatitis as the "yellow plague," the
skin and eyeballs turning a ghastly shade of burnt lemon, this
symptom usually develops after the others: loss of appetite,
nausea, general bodily weakness, headache, chills, respira-
tory problems, diarrhea, pain in the upper abdomen, and
(sometimes) an unexplained distaste for tobacco. The jaun-
dice, or yellowing, comes later, usually after the victim has
become sick enough to be hospitalized.
Until recently, there was not a great deal a person could
do, short of complete abstinence, to protect himself against
either Type A or B hepatitis. Gamma globulin shots from time
to time help protect against Type A, but they do not really
make you immune— simply less apt to come down with a se-
rious case. As of this writing, however, there is a vaccine,
reportedly 90 percent effective, as immunization against Type
B (serum) hepatitis. Unfortunately, this still leaves us with no
cure for the Type A disease, and we can only hope that suc-
310
cess in eradicating Type B will lead to a breakthrough in this
other area.

Genital herpes. This has become a disease of epidemic

proportions, according to the Federal Center for Disease Con-
trol. The increase from 1966 to 1979 was over 850 percent,
and there is no known cure. Although less dangerous than
syphilis or gonorrhea, in that it will probably not kill or maim
you, it is a nasty virus infection that afflicts an estimated 20
million Americans. The two most common types of herpes
infections are usually called "herpes simplex, type one and
type two." Type one causes cold sores. Type two causes
genital herpes, and is sexually transmitted. The symptoms
usually occur within two to ten days after contact, and include
painful, recurring sores or blisters in the genital area. You
really do not have much protection against this disease,
unless you happen to notice the sores on your partner's body.
When these sores are visible, the disease is more active and
the risk of infection is greater. There is now an ointment on
the market call Zovirax, which helps in treating the sores but
will not cure the disease. There have also been some
newspaper reports of a laboratory breakthrough in the
development of a treatment, but as of this writing it has not
been ascertained that it will be effective on humans. There
isn't much else I can tell you about it, and there isn't much
you can do to avoid getting it, except to be alert for the visi-
ble symptoms on your potential partner. If you see something
suspicious. . .well, that's up to you.
Amebiasis. This amoebic disease used to be common only
in Third World countries, where drinking water was often con-
taminated with sewage. Recently, it has been increasingly
prevalent among gay men. The amoeba is transmitted from
one person to another by physical contact, or through eating
food that has been handled by an infected person. The symp-
toms are almost entirely in the digestive tract, with alternate
diarrhea and constipation, severe cramps, fatigue, and a
slight fever— in fact, the same symptoms we normally refer
to as "the turistas" or "Montezuma's revenge." Treatment
311
is not difficult, but it takes from a few days to a month to clear
up the condition, the most common cure being effected by
a series of pills, taken over a six-week period. Unfortunately,
the infected person does not build an immunity to the disease,
so he can easily get it again. In some people, the symptoms
are not obvious, which complicates the problem of trying to
stop its spread, since the carrier may not know he is giving
more than love to his partner. Obviously, the anal activities
that became so popular in the 70's are the main culprit in
spreading amebiasis, and if you are into this your chances
of getting the disease are much greater than those who are
not. A good wash-up afterwards, including a douche, brushing
the teeth and gargling with a good antiseptic mouthwash will
help to prevent your getting it, but there is no guarantee. If
you are infected, however, be sure to seek treatment and ab-
stain from sexual activity until you are cured. There can be
complications, since the amoeba may get into your liver,
where it can form an abscess the size of a grapefruit, and
require surgery to remove. Some doctors, especially those
in areas where gay anal sex is not as common, may mis-
diagnose these liver abscesses as appendicitis, so it is best
to discuss your sexual practices with your doctor if you display
the symptoms!

AIDS (Acquired immune deficiency syndrome). This has

become the most terrifying specter on the gay scene, and
makes all the other diseases I've listed seem pale by compari-
son. Yet, many sexually active people have lived through the
initial crisis, and even today (September 1988) remain "HIV
negative"; i.e., uninfected. In all the rest of this "AIDS up-
dated version," most especially in the Introduction, I have
attempted to define the disease and to point out the best ways
of avoiding infection. In re-reading the above section on hepa-
titis itstruck me most strongly that the safeguards against
this older malady are very similar to those recommended for
AIDS prevention. Thus, many of us have been practicing
"safe-sex" for years, and maybe that's the reason we're still
around to talk about it. It also points up the fact that one need
not be celibate to survive.
312
 Since I have already defined AIDS in the Introduction, and
given the basic rules for "safe-sex," I am not going to repeat
all of it here. Instead, I would like to utilize the space to enlarge
upon the remarks I have already made. Whatever I write at
this point is going to be obsolete within a short while, anyway,
because the advances in treatment (not to be read as "cure"
or "immunization") are advancing very rapidly. My own im-
pression, after reading and trying to digest every word I can
find on the subject, is that we are in for a long time span
wherein there is neither cure nor serum. But I am hopeful
that the medical establishment is going to produce a wide
enough variety of drugs that an infected person can be sus-
tained for an indefinite period of time— much as a diabetic
is today. . .that he can be "kept going" until a cure is even-
tually discovered.
So, today, what do we know about the disease, and how
can we use this knowledge to keep from getting it? We know
with a fair degree of certainty that AIDS is caused by a very
tiny virus, so small that it can penetrate a container that is
otherwise water-tight, even air-tight. The best guess on the
part of the authorities is that it can not penetrate your skin,
however, unless there is an open wound— but that wound
need not be very big. Even a severely chapped area may per-
mit entry— or a cut so small you are hardly aware of it.
Thus, if we analyze— without panic— the sexual activities
in which we might engage, it should be possible to rank them
in order of risk. Our conservative politicians would like us all
to abstain from any sexual activity (except, of course, for a
married heterosexual couple). Fair enough; you can't get
AIDS by doing nothing. But as your balls turn blue, you begin
to wonder if there isn't some other way.
You can buy a good porno flick and lie on your bed for a
hot JO session. That's perfectly safe, even if you do it with
a buddy. From here, it is only a small step to a real scene,
which might include almost any form of bondage, whipping
(with a clean, uncontaminated whip), boot licking, and all the
trappings of verbal abuse, humiliation, etc. If one or both guys
cum, they do it by hand and not into one another's bodies.
No risk here, either.
313
 What about cocksucking? That's considered "low risk,"
as long as it isn't done to climax. What about pre-cum? Well,
that's the low risk. It's always there, but there isn't much of
it. The "experts" are not unanimous in their assessments
of the danger, but most of them grudgingly concede that suck-
ing cock, short of climax, is not very dangerous. Except that
you're dealing with a deadly virus. Is a 1 % risk— or a .0001 %
risk too much? This is an assessment you have to make for
yourself. Of course, you can put a rubber on the cock to be
sucked, but that is a bit like working on a dildo. There are
little "Stubbies," rubbers made to fit over just the tip of the
cock, and these may be the answer— except that they have
not been laboratory tested, as of this writing, so we can't be
sure how retentive they really are.
Probably 99% of the guys who have been infected engaged
in anal intercourse. Most of them also did other things, but
ass fucking seems to be the common denominator. It is the
single most dangerous act you can commit. The experts tell
us we should use a condum (rubber), but not all brands are
of the same quality. Some are more retentive than others.
Here's a little list from a test report done at UCLA and submit-
ted to the Feds in June 1988. On a scale of "100" as a perfect
score, these are the results based on "safety and
effectiveness":
SCORE BRAND

98.9 Mentor
91.3 Ramses Non-lube
91.3 Ramses Sensitol
85.2 Gold Circle Coin
83.7 Gold Circle
83.7 Skeik Elite
81.7 Durex Nuform
80.2 Pleaser
78.7 Ramses Extra
77.3 Embrace Her
77.2 Hot Rubber
76.6 Lifestyles Stimulus

314
 75.3 Ramses NuFbrm
74.8 Excita Extra
71.9 Yamabuki
71 .4 Trojan-Enz
71.1 Trojan-Enz Lubricated
70.4 Duo
69.9 Shields
69.9 Trojan Plus
68.4 Zero O-2000
68.1 Prime
66.8 Lifestyles Nude Plus
64.1 Arouse
62.7 Tahiti
60.9 Lifestyles Contura
60.6 Lifestyles Nude
57.7 Trojan Ribbed Natural
50.9 Trojan Ribbed
21.3 Contracept Plus

In the above, I have included brands marketed only in Europe,

Canada, or Japan, but not experimental brands not on the
market.

As you can see, even the best brands of rubbers are not
100% safe, although even the lower rated ones are going to
be better than nothing. However you cut it, the risk is there.
Do you wish to take it? And that's the name of the game, isn't
it? You know the danger; you know it's very real . . .and very
deadly. It is going to be with us for years to come. We've all
had to pull in our horns; you must decide how far you need
to pull in your own.
Now, let's turn the coin, so to speak. Up to this point I have
been directing my comments to guys who are presumably HIV
negative. . .or untested but apparently healthy. If you're in the
latter group, should you get the antibody test? Although a year
ago I might have said no, I now feel that anyone who has
engaged in high risk sex should take the test. You have a
responsibility to both yourself and to your partner. If you know
you are positive there are various regimens that can help you
315
stave off the onset of the disease. This knowledge should
also help reinforce your determination to engage only in "safe
sex." Common decency, if not the law, requires that you ad-
vise your partner and let him decide if he wishes to enter into
a scene with you.
If you have been diagnosed with either ARC (AIDS Related
Complex) or AIDS itself, you probably know more about the
disease and the treatment than I do. However, there are
several organizations that can supply information that goes
beyond the standard, FDA approved drug programs. They
may also be able to guide you into some sort of holistic health
program to sustain you in a healthy (or healthier) condition.
Some of these groups are unable to sustain themselves for
long periods of time, so try the AIDS Hotline for current infor-
mation: (800) 342-AIDS, or contact Project Inform: (415)
558-9051 . They publish a monthly newsletter. There are lots
of people in various organizations who are trying to help, and
it behooves any infected person to make use of them. No one
can accurately assess the value, in physical terms, of a
healthy emotional outlook. But it has to be a positive factor.
Don't neglect it.

316
CHAPTER FOURTEEN— The Maestro's
Circular File
Nearing the end of this monumental attempt to reconcile the
many facets of SM, and to organize the material into some
sort of logical sequence, I find a number of my own memos
and letters from other guys, all posing questions that deserve,
if not an answer, at least a comment. Since I was unable to
work them into the other chapters, despite stretching logic
in several instances to achieve a grouping, I'll cover them
here and make no pretense of having any sane reason for
lumping them together. I trust you will not find them any more
outrageous than the rest of the ideas I have been suggesting.

The conservative dilemma. Since we find gay people in

all walks of life, I suppose it is not surprising to find a number
of them involved in the far right movement. Still, I can't help
but wonder what they are thinking when they support the vari-
ous campaigns that are directly aimed at doing us in. For a
while, I had a guy coming to me from time to time, who
was into a very heavy punishment scene. When it came to
whipping, he just couldn't get enough. He always wanted

317
me to "talk dirty," to put him down as a "lousy cocksucker,"
etc. I knew he had stopped coming to me because he had
moved back east, but even I was surprised to discover he
was working for one of the media/direct mail organizations,
telling the public that the "gay movement should be put back
in the closet, where it belongs."
Admittedly, many of us resent having to support a political
candidate only one step removed from being an out-and-out
socialist, in order to help elect a man with some semblance
of humanity who will support the cause of our (and other peo-
ple's) civil rights. It is my own feeling that a majority, although
possibly only a bare majority, of gay men are basically con-
servative when it comes to economic issues, and to such con-
siderations as national defense and the need for our intelli-
gence organizations to operate effectively. A few years ago
it looked as if there might be a glimmering of light at the end
of this very long tunnel. Unfortunately, the far right bible
thumpers have so clouded the issues as to scare off the politi-
cians who might have recognized the enormous potential of
this component within their electorate^). If you have shared
this belief, let me assure you there are plenty who feel the
same way. A very active political friend of mine reported an
interesting conversation to me, just recently. A reporter from
one of our gay publications was interviewing a man known
to be gay, who was involved in these rightist political activities.
The man being interviewed remarked, "Gay men don't vote
their balls." The reporter replied: "They do when then think
someone's trying to cut them off."
The sex killings. Among the most distressing phenomena
of the last few years have been the "SM killings" (media term,
not mine). For any of us involved in SM sex, it is difficult to
suppress a sense of emphatic guilt when we read about these
things in the newspapers or see the grisly details splashed
across the TV screen. It started a few years ago with the Corll-
H en ley-Brooks murders in Houston, where over two dozen
bodies of young men were recovered by the police after one
of the kids killed the ringleader. We then had the "trashbag"
murders in Southern California, so named because this creep
318
killed his victims, stuffed their bodies into plastic trash bags,
and dumped them in various areas around Los Angeles and
Orange Counties. There followed the Gacey murders in Chi-
cago, then back to Los Angeles for the worst series of all,
the "Freeway Killings," for which William Bonin has been
convicted in both Los Angeles and Orange Counties.
There is no denying the horror of any murder, but especially
this type, which are strictly sex crimes. It has been one of
the arguments used by those who wish to tar us all with the
same brush, and to put SM down as an evil practice, deserv-
ing of severe penalties. But the people who commit these
crimes are no more related to us than the "Hillside Strangler"
or numerous other men who murder women are related to
the average heterosexual. There certainly are so many cases
of forcible rape on the books of every city in the western world
(and probably in the Iron Curtain counties as well), that it takes
a computer to keep track of them. The people who commit
these crimes are, for the most part, all suffering from the same
type of psychopathology, and their sexual orientation merely
directs them to one gender or the other. They are men without
a social conscience, and they are cut from the same mold
as the great murderers throughout history, many of whom
were as likely to kill a boy as a girl.
As to the dangers one of the SM group might face from
such people as these, I am inclined to believe it is minimal.
Most of the victims in these crimes were hitchhiking kids, or
hustlers whom the killer picked up off the street. The chances
of running into a killer within the circles normally thought of
as gay— in bars, clubs (private or otherwise), sex ads, etc.,
are small. The greatest danger from these people likes in sub-
mitting yourself to someone who is unqualified, or strung out
on drugs. One hears of terrible accidents occurring in such
settings, although the incidence of these is fortunately low.
In San Francisco, prior to the AIDS epidemic, the county coro-
ner tried to set up classes to instruct SM people in the safe
and sane procedures to be followed in a scene, but "public
opinion" (read "political considerations") forced him to stop.
Too bad because San Francisco has one of the worst records
when it comes to people being accidentally killed or maimed
319
in SM sessions, largely, I think, because of the heavy drug
use in the area.
Then there is the M who digs the thrill and danger of pick-
ing up a punk, allowing the guy to tie him down and work
Trim over. This probably accounts for the greatest number of
fatalities, although they seldom make the headlines like mass
killings with an obviously gay culprit. In these instances, the
really horrible murders— beheadings, mutilations, men be-
ing stabbed 50 or 60 times— are all too common. Much of
the fierce brutality stems from the belief of the hustler or other
punk that he isn't really gay (although he may never have
had any other type of sex). He harbors a heavy resentment
for the guy who picked him up, especially if he sees evidence
of affluence acquired by hard work in spite of his sexual
orientation.
I have one friend who digs this scene. Despite my best ef-
forts to dissuade him, he persists in it, and I am afraid he
will one day be found in an unfortunate condition. However,
he insists he has evolved a solution. In his moderately well-
equipped blackroom, all the metal restraints are separated
from the leather and whips. The locks and keys are all kept
at the far end of the room, away from the other materials and
from the area of greatest interaction. Well out of reach of the
keys, he has a long chain locked to the ceiling. When he
brings a hustler home, he secures the guy by this chain, pad-
locked around his neck. The key, he tells the guy, is outside
the room. My friend then submits himself to the hustler's
abuse, reminding the kid he can only get loose after the
scene, when and if my friend is in shape to retrieve the key
and release him.
Then there's the case of another acquaintance, a chubby
little fellow who likes to play these games. He picked up a
hot number on the street, and got into a bondage/enema ses-
sion, with the visitor as Top. Alas, the kid became disillusioned
with the activities at the point where Tubby was tied down,
spread eagle on the bed, with a pillow under his gut to raise
his ass above the rest of his body. His visitor filled him almost
to overflow from the enema can, then stuck a flower in his
ass and departed. Since Tubby lived in a boarding house at
320
the time, he had no choice but to scream for the landlady
to come and release him. Embarrassing, but at least he lived
to tell about it.

The police fetish. For many guys, the uniformed police-

man, isa powerful sexual attraction. The fantasy of master-
ing or being mastered by a cop is high on the list for
thousands of men. The reason is not really obscure, although
those who do not share it may find the fantasy difficult to em-
pathize. Insome ways, it is the same drive as the abused
child who runs to the abusing parent for protection, or the
captive who displays the Stockholm Syndrome. Even a man
who may otherwise be very anti-police, will often find the sex-
ual aura of the uniform a tremendous turn-on. I went into this
at greater length in the original Handbook, but since no col-
lection on SM would be complete without some comments
and an example of this fetish ("situational fetish" by my earlier
definition), I'd like to relate a little story told by a friend who
swears it's true. (Crossed his heart and hoped to die.)
Whether it is true or not, it so perfectly depicts the fantasy
I feel compelled to tell it. My friend, by the way, is a very hunky
guy, a weight lifter who has made himself hard and beautifully
defined without packing on the grotesque musculature of the
pro. He is in his late thirties, with dark hair and a little jawline
beard. He is also well endowed, circumcised, and very much
of a two-way swinger. On the statistical charts in the next
chapter, he would qualify as neither S nor M, not even "S
1/2" or "M 1/2"— rather a total "1/2" rating.
I'd been out cruising around on a Thursday
night... spent a couple hours at the Pits, where I ran into
so many friends I socialized right up to closing time (2:00
AM), and didn't do myself any good. I was kinda horny,
so after I left the bar I went home along the most produc-
tive route, but there wasn't much of anything on the
street. It was about quarter to three when I got home and
parked my pickup on the street in front of the house. I
couldn't use the garage, because I've been remodeling
and it was full of tools and lumber. I'd been inside about
fifteen minutes when the neighbor's dog started carry-
321
ing on, and I thought I heard something outside. I was
still mostly dressed— leather pants, boots, and black cot-
ton shirt, although the shirt was unbuttoned and hang-
ing out over my belt. Thinking to chase the intruder away,
if there was one, I went out the side door and looked over
the gate. There was a black & white standing in front of
my door!
I went out, onto the street, not quite sure what to ex-
pect, and as I came around the corner of the house I was
face to face with a young cop. He was just walking back
from my front door, where I guess he must have rung the
bell, or knocked. My bedroom was in the back, so I
wouldn't have heard the knock, and the doorbell wasn't
working— part of my current fix-up project. "What's the
trouble?" I asked.
"That your vehicle?" he returned.
I told him it was, and he related one of those typical
cop stories about its resembling some truck described
as being involved in burglaries in the area. He also com-
mented on the engine still being warm. "It should be,"
I said. "I just came home. If you want to see the registra-
tion, I'll be happy to show it to you, to prove it belongs
at this address."
"That won't be necessary," he hold me. "I've already
run a make on it." With that, our verbal exchange ended
for a moment, mostly because I didn't know what else
to say. Standing on the edge of my own property, I did
not feel the intimidation I might have... that you usually
do, in a confrontation with a cop. During these few mo-
ments of mutual appraisal, I realized that the cop was a
really good-looking kid. He had to be fairly new on the
force, but not fresh out of the Academy, or they would
never have sent him out on night patrol by himself. Fi-
nally, just as a jibe, and intending to needle him a little
for making a disturbance at this hour of the morning, I
said: "It must get lonely riding around by yourself at
night."
He had been taking in my appearance and costume, ig-
noring my question, he responded with one of his own.
322
 "You been out riding a motorcycle?"
"No," I replied honestly. "I've been to a leatherbar."
This really seemed to take him back, because there was
no doubt as to my meaning, or to the tacit admission of
my sexual orientation and interest. He may have been
shocked, certainly surprised I had said it, and I knew he
was momentarily at a loss to respond. Out on some other
street he might have gotten nasty, but standing in front
of my house there wasn't very much he could say.
Finally, I looked him in the eye and asked: "Is there any-
thing can
I do for you?"
I fully expected he would say, "No," climb back into
his patrol car and drive away. Instead, he looked at my
truck and said, "You've got a pretty nice vehicle, there.
You shouldn't be leaving it out on the street, 'specially
not on a curve like this."
"I've been working on my playroom," I told him. "I've
got the garage full of tools and junk." I was beginning
to be a bit amused by the situation, still not expecting
anything to come of it.. .but willing to play it out.
"Playroom?" he responded.
"Yeah, you know, my own private little space." I didn't
really expect him to pick up on my double meaning, but
he did. "I've heard about those rooms," he said even-
ly. He paused a moment, then added, "But I've never seen
one."
"You mean you'd like to see it?" I asked.
He shrugged, assuming a more calculated pose with
his thumbs hooked over his wide leather belt.
"Well," I hedged, giving my stock response to people
who ask to see my blackroom, "it's a working dungeon,
not a tourist attraction."
For a moment, he seemed to have a hostile expression,
and I was afraid I had gone too far. But I had nothing to
lose, since the worst he was going to do was call me some
unflattering name, hop into his car and drive away. But
he did not respond, and the fact that he stayed where he
was convinced me he really was interested. It was minute
or two before I could think of exactly the right remark to
323
keep this going. Finally, I said, "If you'd still like to see
it, I'd be happy to show it to you. Have you called in for
your dinner break, yet?"
"No," he replied simply.
"Why don't you, then. It'll give us more time." And that
was just about as far as I would ever dare go with a cop.
I never have trusted them, although I have to admit a cer-
tain attraction to the uniform.
He hesitated another few seconds before nodding as-
sent, going around to the open window of his patrol car,
reaching inside and giving whatever the magic words are
for an officer to take off for his lunch hour. Well, I thought,
he's certainly called my bluff.
As I guided him through the back way, thus avoiding
the jumble in the house proper, the thought crossed my
mind that he might be leading me on in the hope of pen-
etrating some "secret cult" or whatever the papers were
calling those things at the time. It also occurred to me
that he might just be after a blow job, which was not at
all what I had in mind. At the door to my little dungeon,
I turned to him, taking the keys off my belt. I looked him
in the eye, giving him my best "Master's stare-down,"
and said, "Have you ever been tied up before?"
It was tempting to break the eye contact as I noted in
my peripheral vision that his right hand had moved in
response to my question. There was another pregnant
moment, before— much to my relief, as well as to my
satisfaction— he looked down and said, "No.. .not exactly,
but I have been handcuffed."
It was now my turn to take a moment for the courage
to collect, before I reached toward his leather handcuff
pouch. He made no move to stop me, but said matter-of-
factly, "You know I called in your license number..."
"Yeah," I replied. "If anything happens to you, they'll
know where to pick up the pieces." I took his handcuffs
and held them, not really wanting to put them on him yet,
because I wanted to get his shirt off first. "Let's go in-
side," said,
I unlocking the door and pulling it open.
324
 I stepped in, and he followed me. The room was illumi-
nated only by a small night light, barely enough to allow
him a glimpse of the general surroundings. I had a lot of
toys and leather restraints hanging on the walls, and sev-
eral heavy chains dangling from the ceiling in various
parts of the room. There were also several pairs of steel
manacles hanging in clear view, plus a couple of gas
masks and a row of leather hoods on a shelf by the door.
"Jesus, Kee-rist!" he muttered, but he just stood aside
as I pulled the door shut and latched it.
"How long have we got?" I asked.
"Half... three-quarters of an hour," he said.
"You'd better get some of that stuff off you, then," I
told him. I inclined my head toward the clothing hooks
on the wall, then turned to light a couple of amber lamps.
I also shoved a tape into the player. I had not been watch-
ing him, and when I turned back he was still standing as
before, except that he had taken off his hat and hung it
on one of the hooks. He was in the process of removing
his gun and night stick holster. I still held his handcuffs,
and I bounced these on my palm, deciding to wait and
leave it to him, how much he took off. With the time lim-
ited as it was, and still not completely sure of him, I wasn't
going to press the issue. Whatever came of it, it was like
"found money," and I was trembling like a virgin on her
first fuck, anyway. The cop, once his hat had been re-
moved, was a little shorter than I had realized... very
blond, also very handsome, almost pretty.
Up to this point, I had been so preoccupied with the
verbal fencing, and just maneuvering him into the black-
room, I had not really responded to him physically. Now
I began to feel the glow through my groin, as I really began
to turn on to him. I watched quietly as he continued to
remove his shirt and T-shirt, hanging these on the hooks
before he turned to look at me, as if asking how far I ex-
pected him to go. He had a nice body, which probably
looked even better than it was, under the yellowish lights.
Without saying anything, I took him by the shoulders
and turned him around, pulled his hands behind him and
325
snapped his own cuffs around his wrists. I then came up
against him, pressing myself onto his naked back and
reached around to play with his nipples. I fumbled for a
moment before I found the left one, and in so doing felt
the frantic pounding of his heart. I think it was the realiza-
tion of his own fear and excitement that encouraged me,
and eliminated the last residue of anxiety. He really was
willing to play the game, and the only pressure was time.
I spun him around to face me, took hold of his belt and
pulled the flap to free the buckle, opened his fly, and
shoved the whole mass of pants and shorts down his
thighs. I was aware of his cock, still compressed against
his balls by the molding effect of his jockey shorts... cir-
cumcised and stubby-fat, curving a bit to the right. He
probably thought I was going to take hold of it, but in-
steadencircled
I him with one arm, took a handful of hair
with the other, and pulled his head back enough to bring
his mouth level with mine. I kissed him with a hard,
demanding force that took him completely off guard. He
resisted me for a moment, before relaxing his jaw and
allowing my tongue to penetrate between his teeth. I
could feel his body tense, shudder, and suddenly go
almost limp. At least, he allowed his full weight to fall for-
ward, against me, so I was actually supporting us both.
When I let go of him, I didn't waste any more time. Tak-
ing hold of his dick, which was now tumescent, but not
quite hard, I led him into the center of the room, and un-
hooked along dog-chain-collar from the ceiling. I dropped
this around his neck, and refastened it to the steel eye
in the ceiling. I held him again for a moment, and started
talking to him, reminding him of his nakedness, how help-
less he was. "I ought to put a few marks on you," I add-
ed, "something to show your buddies back in the shower
room."
"Oh, no.. .please," he whispered. "Don't mark me!"
I reached down and took hold of his balls, giving them
a good twist while I reached for a stretcher on the near-
by wall. "We'll see how well you perform," I replied.
I stretched his balls down with the leather harness and
326
spread them with the crosspiece. As soon as I had started
to work his balls, his cock had sprung up, and it now
pointed almost at the ceiling— about average length, but
thick as a tall beer bottle. I stepped back and took a hit
of amyl, then forced him to take one, as well. This was
apparently something new to him, because he tried to pull
away. But I held his head with one hand, and using my
thumb depressed one nostril and held the bottle to his
nose with the other. He took a long sniff, and wobbled
uncertainly for a second. I was almost ready to unsnap
his neck chain, because I was afraid he was going to keel
over. But he managed to right himself, and looked at me
with his clear, blue eyes as the vapors circled through
his brain. I knew he felt the heat and the drifting
sensation.
I untied his shoes, and helped him step out of his pants
while he was still sighing and saying, "Phew!" to the ef-
fects of the amyl. I teased him with a pair of tit clamps,
but I could see they frightened him, so satisfied myself
by playing with his nipples. I finally took a hard grip with
one hand, pulling downward as I reached with the other
and unfastened his collar from the ceiling. Slowly, he went
onto his knees and I opened the front of my leather pants.
I played with my dick, bringing it almost full hard and slap-
ping him across the face with it a couple of times. I didn't
say anything to him, just kept playing with myself until
he leaned into me. He wasn't a very good cocksucker,
and he gagged with only a minimal penetration, but he
tried as I leaned over him and smacked his butt a few
times with my hand.
When I stood him back up again, and had him secured
by the neck as he had been before, I clipped the ring on
his ball spreader to another hanging chain— this a few feet
in front of him. The weight of this second chain exerted
a little additional pull on his balls, giving him the sensa-
tion of being restrained from two directions, secured by
his neck and his nuts. He must have found this particularly
exciting, because he kept groaning, arched his back and
hung there with a raging hard on. I gave him a few more

327
hits of amyl, which he took without protest, and worked
his butt a little more, this time with a light leather belt.
"No marks," he gasped again, "please."
"We'll leave that for next time," I assured him.
It had all the makings of a really hot scene, if it had not
been for the time. We had now been downstairs for about
half an hour, so I let the chain loose from his balls,
greased us both up and Jacked off both cocks with one
hand. He came first, but I was not far behind. While he
was still hanging there, I told him I thought he was really
a guy who needed to be punished from time to time, and
he agreed.
When I turned him loose, he cleaned himself up as best
he could with a towel, and put his uniform back on. When
he was fully dressed, I grabbed him and kissed him, again.
I know I caught him by surprise, but he responded— a lit-
tle test, by the way, that isn't bad to remember with a part-
ner of uncertain orientation. I told him to stop by any time
he was in the area, and he said he would. I don't know
if this was just one of those fleeting experiences we have
from time to time, or whether he actually will come back.
It's only been a couple of weeks, so I'm still hopeful.

Organizations. Although the media, catering to the "great

unwashed," will periodically resurrect the old term "homo-
sexual ring," and in whatever reference they make to SM,
refer to it as a cult, there really is no all-encompassing organi-
zation to which thousands, or even many hundreds, of gay
SM men belong. I've mentioned GMSMA in New York, but
this is more an educational organization than anything else,
and it certainly is not secret. The motorcycle clubs, especially
in California (where they are the most active, due to a climate
that permits the riding of bikes all year) are still stuck on their
old theme: "We are clubs interested in promoting the safe
and pleasurable riding of motorcycles. We are not sex clubs,
etc." In fact, in attempting to get as many groups as pos-
sible to cooperate in the distribution of my questionnaire, I
received no help from my local clubs. "It's just a commer-
cial venture," they told me. "We can't support that." Despite
328
the official snobbery, of course, their runs and open meetings
are still the most fertile hunting grounds for SM guys.
T.A.I.L. (Total Ass Involvement League), which I also men-
tioned earlier, is international, but it comprises very anally
oriented guys, not necessarily SM people. A group in San
Francisco calling itself U.S.A. (Uncircumcised Society of
America), seeking to bring men of this specific interest to-
gether, unfortunately fell by the wayside a couple of years
ago. The only openly gay SM club with more than regional
membership, to the best of my knowledge, is the Chicago
Hellfire Club. Although it has only twenty or so full members,
they have a couple hundred associate members (of which
I am one) scattered all over the world. You must be spon-
sored by a member, but if you're interested drop a line to:
C.H.C., Box 5426, Chicago, IL 60680. Their annual run, "In-
ferno," isa fabulous gathering.
Of the commercial introduction and advertising services
catering to our group, there are two I would recommend: Dun-
geonMaster/Drummer, P.O. Box 11314, San Francisco, CA
94101 , and Bound & Gagged, c/o Outbound Press, Suite 729,
263-A W. 19th St., NYC 1001 1 . You might also try Interchain
(Box 140, 132 West 24th St., New York, NY 1001 1) I am not
personally acquainted with them, but they seem to have a
lot of subscribers.
Other than these, there are no organizations that I know
enough about to make a referral. However, there probably
is something going in you area, if you live in a large city. If
you check around at your local leatherbar, or whatever passes
for such, you may get a line on it. I am not going to try listing
the bars and suppliers this time, because I had too many prob-
lems inthe original Handbook, trying to verify the true status
of businesses, and to keep up with those that folded or were
newly opened. For an up-to-date listing of these, try: Gay Yel-
low Pages, Box 292LT, Village Station, New York, NY 10014;
Bob Damron's Addressbook, P.O. Box 14-077, San Fran-
cisco, CA 941 14; Spartacus, P.O. Box 3496, 1001 AG Amster-
dam, Holland. All of these are dependable people, who have
been in business a long time and publish a reliable listing
at least once a year.
329
 In seeking an organization, I think it is a good idea to tread
very carefully. Small groups often start up, and quickly die
a well-deserved death. On my recent trip to New York, a friend
related his experience with such an organization, and I repeat
it here as a case in point.
The group advertised, and seemed to have quite an age
span, so I answered the ad, just to check it out. I got a
phone call in reply, and made a date to go out and meet
the guy who was, I guess, their membership chairman.
I went up to his apartment, and the guy was sort of a troll,
but I figured he maybe didn't represent the typical mem-
ber. After we'd talked for a few minutes, he allowed as
how I look like a guy who would be into their scene, but
they have one requirement, and that was to see if I would
follow instructions. So, he said the instruction was that
I should take off my clothes. I took my clothes off, and
that seemed to satisfy him. I was invited to their next
meeting.
I got there at the designated time, 8 PM, and there must
have been five other Tops... maybe seven or eight bot-
toms. Now, to start with, they were collectively the most
unattractive group of men I ever laid eyes on. There was
one other new, prospective member— probably the best
looking one in the group, and he must have presented
himself as a bottom, because they had a whole list of
things they wanted to do to him... put him in a dress and
stuff a hose up his ass, let him blow bubbles with his
ass... this sort of thing. Everyone was supposed to hu-
miliate him.
The way they had it set up, because I was the newest
Top in the group, I had my choice of bottoms. Naturally,
I picked this other new guy for myself. They had this ar-
rangement, where they blew a whistle and when they did,
all the bottoms were supposed to line up at one end of
the room, and take their clothes off. Then, one at a time,
they got up on a table that had a light shining on it, like
a spotlight, and as each one stood there he had his hands
tied behind his back. The Tops were then supposed to
330
examine each prospective bottom after they had all been
tied and returned to their line against the wall.
It was a small room in one guy's apartment, so when
I picked my M, I moved him out about four feet. They then
decided he should have handcuffs on him, instead of
ropes, so they changed that. Then they attached ropes
to his cuffs, and these were passed through rings in the
ceiling. Two of the club members pulled on the ropes to
hoist him up, so he was literally standing on his toenails.
Now, this was the first time they had been with him.
They had never bothered to ask if he had any specific
health problems, or anything else. He was just strung up
there in the bright light, and was facing us, and they told
me to go ahead and start with him. So I start to work on
him, going pretty easy and not really doing too much, and
they're all standing behind me, saying it isn't much of a
display. But I can see that the guy is getting into some
kind of trouble. He acts like he's ready to throw up. So
I took him down, and they were asking me why I wasn't
working on him... why I didn't clip his pubic hair. That was
one of the things they had decided they wanted done to
him.
But I could see the guy's about to pass out, and I'm
trying to get him out of the ropes, and I asked them,
"What are we doing here? We're supposed to know what
SM is all about, and that means observing some rules of
safety." So I got him into the bathroom, and he had the
dry heaves. It turns out he had just gotten out of the hos-
pital with a case of stomach ulcers. Anyway, before I
could get him settled down, they had somebody else
strung up, and he started to get upset when they really
started whipping him... without any build-up or anything,
and they asked him, "What's the matter? You said you
were into a really heavy scene." But he got no sympathy
at all. Meanwhile, my guy is sitting over in a comer, try-
ing to catch his breath.
Well, I got this second guy all settled down, and we
were playing a little. I was doing some cock wrappings
with him, but in the meantime one of the other Tops had

331
been trying to get my first bottom going again. I guess
he must have responded a little, because the guy tried
to give him a hit of amyl. At this point, the bottom was
lying on the floor, and the Top ended up spilling the liquid
down his nose, which started all the trouble back up
again, and the end result was the guy's having to go back
to the hospital the next day. I mean, the whole scene was
an absolute disaster!
I finally cut out with the first M, because I wanted to
get him out of there. I considered these guys really dan-
gerous. When they called me for several weeks after that,
wanting to know when I was going to come back, I kept
sloughing them off. One of the guys I know in another
group was concerned, because there had been a couple
of guys found dead in that general area, and he thought
I should stay in touch with them for a while to see if there
was any connection. But I didn't want to be bothered with
them, so after a few calls I finally told them I thought they
were an irresponsible group, and to forget about calling
me anymore.
That was taken, almost verbatim, off the tape I made of
our conversation, i can only advise you not to be afraid to
get up and leave if you find yourself in a situation you con-
sider hazardous. There are good groups and bad groups, just
as there are good Tops and incompetents trying to play top.
Your best protection is your own judgment. But anyone look-
ing for a grand international organization of leathermen is go-
ing to be disappointed. There isn't any.
Women. Although the bible seemed to cast Eve in the cat-
egory ofan afterthought, I apologize for doing the same. How-
ever, really
I don't know very much about the subject, and
only want to make a couple of comments. Whereas women
have little or no place in the male-to-male SM context, they
do comprise over half of all humanity and as such they enter
into our life-space in all manner of situations. I am not con-
cerned here with any of these except as they border on our
community as a whole. However, with the rapid increase of
interest in SM throughout the heterosexual "swinger" groups,
332
I have personally been thrown into contact with more women
than ever before. Some of them, I have found, are quite ex-
traordinary. There are also a number of men who are going
to read this book, whose interests will be both in other men
and in women. For their benefit, I want to list a couple of
groups that may be of interest. While basically heterosexual
in scope, there are gay members in each: The Eulenspiegel
Society (P.O. Box 2783, Grand Central Station, New York,
NY 10163) is the oldest SM group, to the best of my
knowledge. It is run by a good cadre of people, both men and
women. There is also the Society of Janus (P.O. Box 6794,
San Francisco, CA 94101). I have not had as much personal
contact with them, but have corresponded with them, and
also have a great deal of respect for what they are doing.
If your interests are bisexual, you might give them a try.
There is also a growing phenomenon throughout the gay
SM world, wherein certain women are being permitted into
our most sacred inner sanctums. You will occasionally see
a female in a leatherbar in our larger cities, and in Europe
a number of the leather/bike clubs have female "mascots."
I think it is inevitable that we will see still more of this, as
female friends of leather guys develop an interest in what
they're doing, and a concern that they do it safely. Although
the sight of a woman in one of these places, where she seem-
ingly does not belong, will often raise the hackles on a guy's
back, it's something we really should learn to live with. I can't
judge whether it's right or wrong, but I do accept it as a fact
of life. Remember, before you do or say something
derogatory, a great many of these women are on our side,
and are doing the same things we do. They deserve our
respect, if not necessarily our adoration. The European
women, especially, have proven to be fascinating and very
pleasant when I engaged them in conversation. I wouldn't
want to marry one, but . . .

The no-no's. A number of people have written to me since

the publication of the original Handbook, asking where, if at
all, I drew the line. Obviously, I am not overly concerned with
the "morals" of our society, which are generally hypocritical
333
at best, and at worst are mere tools by which one group of
humanity seeks to gain ascendancy over another. Today's
sin is tomorrow's commonplace, and an immoral act in one
jurisdiction may well be acceptable social behavior in another.
So if you ask me where I draw the line, I can answer only
for myself. I do not necessarily project these as standards
for anyone else. To do so would place me in the ridiculous
role of moralist.
Although not personally attracted to "chicken," nor much
concerned about them, I do have strong moral reservations
regarding the man who takes advantage of very small chil-
dren. My attitude is rather ambivalent toward relationships
with young adults—kids in their upper teens, who are
physically mature, but still legally underage. I think there is
a great deal of difference (morally speaking) in proselytizing
an innocent "virgin" and getting it on with a streetwise punk.
The law makes little or no distinction, which is unfortunate.
I know of a number of situations where the kid, classified as
"victim," was considerably more sophisticated than the adult
who got into trouble as a result of their intercourse. I also
find it difficult when I receive a letter from a kid I can sense
is in need of advice; for fear of the legal consequences, I turn
them away, but I sometimes feel guilty for failing to provide
the type of guidance that would have been so beneficial to
me at that same age. I can't advise you, because the law is
on the books. I can only express my opinion.
A topic I have ignored in this book is animals. I know that
many people, more so outside an SM setting, enjoy besti-
ality; i.e., sexual relations with animals, particularly dogs.
Logically, I find it difficult to sustain my position on this,
especially as I approach the end of a book in which I have
described, if not extolled, the pleasures of an enormous sex-
ual diversity. Yet, I can not-— could not bring myself to engage
in these activities with an animal. I have two Doberman
Pinschers (male and female), and love them as members of
my family. But to get it on sexually with either one of them
is something I cannot even contemplate. This is strictly a
moral judgment. Sorry about that.
Public sex is another area where guys are constantly

334
getting into trouble, several times I have had to bail a friend
out of the slammer as a result of his indiscretions. I was also
involved as president of H.E.L.P., and assisted in extricating
a number of people from these situations. I recognize the ap-
peal of tearoom play, and can even appreciate the SM con-
tent of it. The danger is part of the allure. But the police
departments in most American cities maintain vice squads
to combat this type of behavior. With the AIDS crisis being
what it is, the police are even more hard nosed than they used
to be. If a guy gets caught doing these things I can sympathize
with him, but not as much as I used to do. I don't care about
the morality; I just think it's stupid.
The last subject I'll cover in this section has to do with a
more decidedly SM related topic: the drawing of blood in a
scene. For some guys, both Tops and bottoms, a whipping
scene isn't complete until blood is flowing from the lacera-
tions. For others, a "slicing" scene is their ultimate turn-on;
i.e., using a sharp knife or razor blade to make small slits
in the skin. I really question the legitimacy of this. There has
to be a point at which you draw the line, for reasons of
safety, if no other. I think there is a difference— a vast
difference— between a situation where the Top draws blood
merely as a result of a properly moderated whipping scene,
and one where he deliberately sets out to make the M bleed.
Again, this is only my opinion, but it is again a problem aggra-
vated by our current health crisis.

Training your own Top. This is a subject I might more

properly have covered in one of the chapters on relationships,
but I hesitated to do so because I was striving to put forth
a proper sense of dominance-submission, and to clarify the
difference in the basic roles. To have introduced this sub-
ject would surely have muddied the waters and made my
explanations even more confusing to the novice. Instead, I
elected to conclude this chapter with a few remarks on the
subject— completely by itself, and out of the context of other
discussions on relationships.
This is a concept that is certainly a challenge to our logical
understanding of the SM definitions I have tried to give
335
you . . . namely, the situation where an M, acting out as an
M, presumes to train his own Master. But it is a much more
common condition than most people realize, or are willing
to admit. It occurs for a variety of reasons, but most of them
boil down to the old truism: A good Top is hard to find. For
many an M, it may be possible to find a man to top him, but
he may also find the other's experience works against a suc-
cessful interaction. Particularly if the bottom has a complex
set of fantasies, realistic enough to be capable of fulfillment,
he may be unable to relate when he encounters a Top who
wants to follow a different, albeit legitimate pattern. Or it may
happen that the M is afraid of a situation where he cannot
maintain full control. He wants to act out the submissive role,
but he also wants to make sure that only certain things are
done to him.
From conversations I have had with heterosexual SM peo-
ple, itis my feeling that this situation may be even more com-
mon with them than it is with us. It frequently happens that
a married couple, neither of whom were into bondage or any
other form of SM before their marriage, develop an interest.
One partner, either from reading or conversation, or perhaps
from actual experience, recognizes his (her) M inclinations,
and persuades the other partner to give it a try. Whereas
these conditions are probably not going to be as common
among gay men, it also happens to us. It is a somewhat diffi-
cult phenomenon to describe, because the situations tend
to be so diverse. The potential M's will range from men who
are normally Top, and who take this route as a busman's holi-
day, to men who are totally inexperienced in anything but fan-
tasy. The only condition I would definitely exclude from this
discussion is the guy who picks up a street punk and sub-
mits to him. That is an entirely different set of circumstances,
not a condition likely to produce a proper SM relationship.

Although I cannot illustrate every possible variable, let me

take one set of circumstances and try to bring it to life for
you. Whatever your own condition, it may at least give you
an idea of my contention. (Please note, this is a "pre-AIDS"
story.)
33S
 Jim, more commonly called 'Big Jim," had been a well-
known Top for several years. He was very good at every-
thing he did, and he had never appeared In public with
his keys other than on the left. In all of his relationships
he functioned exclusively as an S. He was a large man,
as his nickname implied, well over six feet in height, and
solidly built. He was now clean shaven, except for a thick,
bushy mustache. His features were rugged, with the
promise of a certain cragginess to appear in the years to
come. He was strong and muscular without regular work-
outs, although he did fairly heavy labor around his own
home and on the several rental properties he owned in
the area. His sexual endowments were substantial, like
the rest of his body, and lusty. His thick, uncut cock was
well known in the local sex clubs, where he occasionally
discharged the energies that had found no other, immed-
iate outlet.
Lately, however, he had found himself, more often that
not, on his knees in the little booths, sucking someone
else's cock through the glory hole... and thoroughly enjoy-
ing it. Within the anonymity of the darkened cubicle, he
had found himself able to enjoy the forbidden pleasures
he would otherwise have been unable to acknowledge.
One evening, riding high on a couple of joints and suc-
cessive hits of amyl, he met a peculiarly enticing guy in
the club. This other man— Al, as he was to learn later—
was not the type Jim would normally have pursued. He
was short and slender, with a fairly well-defined body, but
not like the trim, solid little bodybuilders who were
normally his quarry. The guy's cock was about average
in size, and circumcised. As the result of a hip injury, he
also walked with a slight limp. But he exuded a certain
aura of sexuality, and Jim found himself working furiously
on the firm, demanding cock. After some time spent do-
ing this through the glory hole in the wall between their
respective booths, Jim asked the other guy to come into
his cubicle. Al complied and the cocksucking continued
with unrestricted ardor, Al making no move to reciprocate
when Jim backed off to catch his breath.
337
 Kneeling at the feet of this unaccountably compelling
man, there was no doubt in Jim's mind that he was strictly
trade... in fact, he wondered why he was there, in a gay
sex club, when he obviously wanted only a one-sided rela-
tionship. Odd, but the consideration was fleeting, un-
important. He'd seen the guy around before... here and
in the bars, knew he belonged to the community. Look-
ing up in the semidarkness, he held gently onto the
smaller man's thighs, took a tentative lick at the project-
ing cock and asked, "Would you be interested in a
dungeon scene?"
The other shrugged. "I'd dig it with you, man," he
replied, "but I don't know much about it."
"Does the idea turn you on?" asked Jim.
"Yeah, it does," Al admitted.
Al followed him home, giving Jim about half an hour
to himself, to try sorting out his thoughts. He glanced up
several times, almost anxiously, to make sure Al's head-
lights were behind him, assuring himself that the guy was
still with him. He was excited, he realized, more excited
than he had been for a long time. He was going to bot-
tom for this guy... no doubt in his mind; nor, apparently,
in Al's. Jim cupped his hand in his crotch, feeling the
surge of sensation as he squeezed his own erection.
"Jesus," he muttered to himself, "how long's it been
since I drove home with a hard-on, by myself, with the
other guy in a car behind me?" There was no answer ex-
cept his own anticipation of the use Al was going to make
of him.
Once in the blackroom, Jim stripped and took his place,
on his knees, in front of Al. The smaller man seemed a
little uncertain, taking off his jacket and shirt, but leav-
ing his jeans and boots in place. He grasped the sides
of Jim's head, guiding him in his avid cocksucking. Jim
knew he'd have to initiate the action, suggest and lead
without forcing Al to surrender his role as Master. The
guy was hot... real hot, but completely inexperienced... or
was he?
Jim rocked back on his heels, looking up as he had
338
done in the club. "Have you ever played these games be-
fore?" he asked.
"A little bit," Al admitted. "I've been tied up and
whipped, and I've whipped a couple of other guys.. .noth-
ing very heavy, buy I know what it feels like... better to
give than to receive."
"But you've never really worked a guy over?"
"No, but I've thought about it.. .thought about it a lot."
Jim gestured toward the assortment of restraints hang-
ing on the wall. "Anything up there interest you?"
Al pushed his host's head back into his crotch, held
his cock deeply embedded as he examined the various
items. He picked up a pair of leather cuffs, fingered them
and put them back. Jim was watching from the corner of
his eye, maintaining his motion as Al's hand returned oc-
casional y topress him more deeply onto the shaft. Fi-
nally, Al selected a pair of Smith & Wesson handcuffs.
"Let's try these," he said.
Reluctantly, Jim relinquished his hold on the rigid pro-
jection, stood up and assumed a properly submissive pos-
ture in front of the smaller man. He hung his head for-
ward, arms loosely at his sides, gaze on the floor. "Yes,
sir."
Al hesitated a moment, then placed his hands on Jim's
upper arms, turned Mm around and drew the supplicant's
wrists together, behind his back. "Any special way these
should go on?" he asked.
Respectfully, with several "sir's" dropped into his sen-
tences, Jim explained how to fit and set the cuffs. Al
maneuvered him closer to the light, and after a few mo-
ments' fumbling, managed to close the cuffs and secure
them against accidental tightening. He carefully placed
the key on the table, and returned his attention to the man
who was now his prisoner. His own arousal was easily
as great as Jim's, both men exhibiting full, almost pain-
ful erections.
Al stood in front of the big, manacled prisoner, his fin-
gers gently kneading the other's nipples, gradually in-
creasing the pressure until he produced a satisfying
339
intake of breath from his subject, a hissing gasp through
tightly clenched teeth. As he continued the tit play, he
swiveled his lower body, causing his prick to strike Jim's.
His eyes roved the assortment of small leather and metal
items on a narrow shelf beside them, uncertain which to
use; not sure, either, exactly how they should be fitted.
He released his grip on Jim's tits, grasped the captive's
balls in his left hand, squeezing the sac to make them
hang lower. His right hand moved to the shelf, touching
one toy, then the next. 'That one," Jim whispered, re-
sponding to the increase of pressure on his balls. Al
picked up the indicated leather ball stretcher.
'All right, big man," he said, "how does this go on?"
"It goes around the sac, sir," Jim replied. "Fits so as
to push the nuts down to the bottom, but the little strap
underneath has to go from back to front, to spread 'em
after they're stretched."
Al knelt down and worked for several minutes, forcing
the thick skin of Jim's scrotum into the tight enclosure
of leather, finally managing to snap the flange of leather
closed, and to pull the smaller strap across the bottom
to separate the balls. As he did so, he noticed a small
metal ring in the center of this bottom piece. "What's this
for?" he asked, standing and raising Jim's balls by lift-
ing the ring.
"That's so you can attach me to... something, sir.. .or
hang weights from my nuts. Whatever you want to do,
sir."
Al left him standing there as he roved the room, examin-
ing a number of items. Some of the functions were ob-
vious; others were not. The various restraints were no
problem, nor were the hoods. Several complicated strap
assemblies were uncertain, and some of the smaller
toys— apparently cock and ball harnesses— suggested
several interesting possibilities. The idea of using them
on this big, powerfully built man was exciting, almost
debilitating. His hands were unsteady as he started to fin-
ger the half-dozen leather collars, hanging in a row be-
neath the shelf of cock toys. Al picked one of the neck
340
restraints and turned back toward Jim. "How do you think
this would look on you?" he asked.
"Just great," replied the bigger man. The one Al had
picked was a wide, studded slave collar with prongs on
the inside and several "D" rings on the outer surface to
facilitate securing an M to another object. Jim felt a fresh
tide of heat through his nether regions as Al buckled the
leather band tightly about his neck.
"I bet you've used these on lots of guys, haven't you,
big man?"
"Yes, sir," Jim replied.
"And I bet you've attached them to something and
whipped their asses, haven't you?"
"Yes, sir, I've usually attached them to that post over
there, sir, and I've whipped them while they were strung
up by their neck and their balls."
Al examined the whipping post... a four-by-four set in-
to the floor and anchored to the ceiling by heavy steel
angle brackets. There was a metal eyelet screwed into
the wood at about head level, another slightly below the
height of a crotch. A double-headed, steel clip was at-
tached to the lower eyelet, and a string of similar
fasteners hung on the wall nearby. Al took one of these
and snapped it onto the upper eyelet. He then took hold
of Jim's arm and moved him to stand, face against the
wood, while he attached the collar and ball stretcher to
the pair of clips.
"Now, you're strung up by your balls, aren't you, big
leather man?"
"Yes, sir," Jim replied.
"And you've got your naked ass turned toward me, all
ready to get whipped, haven't you?"
"Yes, sir," Jim repeated, trembling at the prospect, but
so excited by the idea he was afraid he would climax at
the first stroke. He was considerably taller than most of
his own subjects, so the placement of the eyelets on the
post was forcing him to bend slightly, increasing the out-
ward thrust of his butt, making it a better target. From
the corner of his field of vision, he saw Al fingering the
341
whips and paddles, the belts and crops that hung in the
nearest comer.
"You want a whip my ass, don't ya, sir?" Jim urged.
"Yea', I |ust don't know which of these is going to do
the best Job on that nice round ass of yours," replied the
smaller man. He fingered a heavy cat, let It tall back
against the wall, then lifted a pliable leather paddle.
"You could do a real number with that one, sir," Jim
whispered.
Al took it down, bent it in his hands, and snapped it
across one palm. "Is that how it's going to sound against
your ass, big man?" he asked.
"Yes, sir," Jim responded, closing his eyes and press-
ing himself against the wood. He tensed, waiting for the
blow. Instead, he felt Al's hands touch his face, making
him Jump by their unexpected contact. An inhaler was
poked into one nostril, the other depressed as he drew
in the amyl. Al waited for him to exhale, then applied the
container to the other side. In doing this, he had pressed
himself against Jim's back, jeans against the naked legs,
chest touching the curve of back, slightly moist, now, with
expectant sweat. Jim could feel the rigid cock slide be-
tween his thighs. When he had taken a hit himself, Al
hung the inhaler around Jim's neck by its rawhide thong,
seized the bigger man's hips and dry fucked him between
the legs for several minutes. Then he stepped back and
delivered the first, moderately heavy blow across his cap-
tive's ass.
Jim drew a hissing breath, leaned into the post and
waited with suspended respiration for the next. When it
came, he groaned, pressed harder against the wood, felt
his cock slide over the hard surface as the stinging blow
sent waves of mingled emotions through his brain. It had
been a long time since anyone had whipped him, and he
had half forgotten the sensation... the mixture of discom-
fort and satisfaction, the sense of humiliation and submis-
sion that turned the physical pain Into mental enjoyment.
But it did hurt, more than he'd remembered... more than
he'd expected. As the blows increased in strength, he
342
found himself writhing against the solid upright, twisting
as much as his bonds would permit while the smaller man
displayed his mastery.
Al paused, exchanged the leather paddle for a light cat.
"You like getting your ass warmed, don't you, big man?"
he demanded.
"Yes, sir," Jim gasped.
"You like it up on your back, too?" And the cat landed
between his shoulder blades.
Jim sighed and leaned into the post. The pain grew
heavier as the novice warmed to his task, and Jim wanted
to beg him to stop. But he knew he was receiving only
a modicum of the punishment he dispensed so often, and
the idea of backing down repelled him. The thought of
his being forced to take a dose of his own medicine fur-
ther aroused him, made the sensation of tightness around
his balls more exciting, emphasized the knowledge of his
own bondage, of being whipped with his own scourges.
He thought back to his first SM sessions, when more ex-
perienced men had trained him, tied him down and
whipped him, violated his body as he had lately been do-
ing to others. An involuntary groan escaped his lips as
Al cracked him full force across the butt.
He was sagging against the post, drawing labored
breaths when the whipping finally stopped. Jim's eyes
were closed, but he could hear Al moving about the room.
First, music started up from the tape deck. Then the in-
haler was held to his nose, again, while the pressure of
the smaller man increased against his tortured back. He
must have shed his jeans, Jim realized, because he could
feel the naked thighs against his own. His fingers moved
in their tight enclosure, fumbled down the wall of his men-
tor's midsection, twisted into the sweat-moistened hairs,
found the rigid cock and grasped it.
"You like that, huh?" asked Al.
"Yes, sir," Jim replied.
"Well, it likes your nice hot ass."
For a second the contact was broken. A few seconds
later, Jim felt lubricant being worked into his asshole,
343
responded with an uncontrollable resistance to the invad-
ing fingers. He tried to twist away, but the smaller man
pulled him back into position. ' 'You're going to get
fucked, man," he heard the other say. "You're going to
take this cock up your ass while you're strung up there
by your neck and your balls, and I'm going to ride that
red hot ass I've just been whipping. How do you like them
egg rolls, Mr. Big Leatherman? You're going to get fucked
in your own dungeon, and there's nothing you can do
about it.
Jim felt the first pressure of Al's cock against his
sphincter, and tried to make the muscles relax. It had
been a couple of years since anyone had fucked him. He
tried to remember the old thrill he'd felt in the past, but
the sudden entrance caused a stab of pain through his
guts. Then Al was hard against him, body clinging to his
backside as the small man held tightly onto the solid wall
of his stomach, lubricated fingers seeking Jim's cock,
grasping it, playing with it while the motion against his
ass assumed a steady rhythm and the spasms of pain
subsided.

Later, lying in Jim's bed, Al stroked the broad chest.

"Do you have to do anything tomorrow?" he asked.
"No, it's Saturday. I've got the day off."
"Me, too," Al replied, sliding himself on top of Jim,
pressing his semihardened prick between the other's
legs. "Maybe we could take a couple of hours, and you
could show me how all those toys you've got are sup-
posed to work."
Jim felt his own cock respond to the suggestion, swell-
ing against the pressure of the smaller man, who now
touched one nipple with his teeth, bit down gently, Just
hard enough to make Jim sigh and twist his head back-
ward, tensing on the threshold of pain. "We've.. .got all
day.. ..sir," he gasped.
"And all night," Al replied, substituting his fingers and
squeezing down hard on the nipple, sending the bigger
man into a contortion of euphoric agony.
344
CHAPTER FIFTEEN— The survey and the
future

In February 1982, when the final agreements were made

regarding publication of this book, I devised and began circu-
lating a questionnaire to as many people as I was able to
reach. To do this, I gave copies to such groups as GMSMA
in New York City, The Chicago Hellfire Club, a number of
leather gathering places (bars and clubs), and also sent it
out on my mailing list. Almost 6000 questionnaires went out,
and my final figure of returns was 1238 responses. Although
all of the groups and businesses that cooperated with me
were domestic (i.e., within the United States), my mailing list
was international. While I had hoped to obtain some figures
to allow a comparison of differences (or universality) on the
basis of region, I could not find any significant variations in
these figures within the first samples I worked, and so did
not pursue it further. The tally had to be done by hand, since
the only computer that would have been available to me was
on the east coast, and would have required extremely
sophisticated programming to obtain the fine shades of differ-
ences required.
I I'll go into the various aspects of this as
we examine the various subjects. I'll try to explain my point

345
in asking the questions, then give the results along with my
interpretations of them. Just as a starting point, my sample
broke down as follows:
Total sample (number of respondents) 1238
White North Americans (US and Canada) 1149
Black North Americans 19
Other North Americans 6
White Europeans 50
Others (including 2 non-white) 14
Before going any further into the results, let me reprint the
questionnaire, to permit the reader to observe precisely the
source of my data. As you will quickly be able to note, my
intent was to cover a wide range of possible facets within the
SM oriented population:

Please answer by inserting the appropriate data:

1. The first 2 numbers of my home ZIP code:
2. My age: 3. My race:
4. My height: 5, My weight:
6. Country of birth:
7. I have a lover (Yes or no):
8. Voter registration (party):
9. In the last presidential election, I voted
for:
10. I prefer my sex partner to be approxi-
mately: to years of age,
generally to inches tall, with a body
build (heavy, slim, etc.) . I prefer that he
be circumcised , uncircumcised ,
doesn't matter
Please answer the following questions by "yes" or "no";
1. I am a high school graduate: College
graduate: Graduate degree?:
2. I am circumcised:
3. I am interested in motorcycles (own, ride,
buddyride, etc.):
4. I have read the Leatherman's Handbook:
5. I regularly go to the baths: Sex clubs
(Mineshaft, Caldron, Meatrack, etc.):
I would go, but there are none in my area:
346
 6. I buy and read books of SM stories: Photo
magazines: I prefer drawings to
photos:
7. I subscribe to, or regularly read:
The Advocate Drummer In
Touch
Mandate Honcho Numbers
DungeonMaster Others (please
specify)

Please answer the following questions by writing in a

number from "0" to "10," 0 being a strong "no" or
"never," 10 being a strong "yes" or "always" (a 5 would
be "about half the time" or "somewhat"):
1. I am sexually active with other guys: (if
"0" skip to question 5):
2. I engage In the following:
As S/Topman As M/bottom
Cocksucking
Ass fucking
Bondage
Whipping, belting
- Flstfucking
Piss scenes
Scat scenes
C/B scenes
Piercing
Usedildoes
Use blindfold
Bootlicking
Light pain
Heavy pain •
Genital shaving
3. The following are a tum-on to me:
Leather clothing Leather belt
Boots Cockrings.
Facial hair Ball stretchers.
Crew cuts Gags
Chicken (14-17) Amyl/Butyl__

347
 Long hair Rubbers.
Big men Rubber clothing.
Smaller men Dildoes
Bikers Leather harness.
Uncut men Metal shackles_
Ropes Neck bindings.
Chains Castration scene.
Handcuffs
Cowboys
Marines
4. I enjoy "public sex" (tearooms, parks, etc.).
5. I enjoy sex without SM or bondage:
6. I am active in motorcycle and/or leather/SM club
activities
My JO fantasies include (0-10):
Leather clothing, Leather belts
Being bound Binding someone else
Being whipped___ Whipping someone else.
Sucking someone
else Getting sucked
Getting fucked__ Fucking another guy
Being enslaved_ Enslaving another guy
Being captured. Capturing another guy
Being castrated Castrating another guy
Being hanged Lynching another guy
Being murdered— Murdering another guy
During solo JO scenes I use (0-10):
Amy If butyl" Rush" Rubbers
tics)(prophylac-
Cockring Rubber clothing;
Ball stretcher^) Mirror(s)
Heavier bondage Slave collar
Metal restraints Other (specify).
Pin prick devices
I use the following (0-10): "Rush"
Grass MDA "Coke"
"Booze" Speed (non-prescription).
Other (please specify)
348
 If you have some specific scene or activity (or equip-
ment) which you particularly like to use or have used on
you, that I have neglected to include, please use the rest
of the form to tell me about it, or about anything you think
I should know about you:

One question which I did not include on the above form,

was: "What percent of the time do you play 'S,' and what
percent 'M'?" It may have been a mistake not to do this, but
I felt I would get more honest answers without it, even though
the replies were supposed to come in completely anony-
mously (which most of them did). Knowing SM guys as well
as I do, I knew there would be a tendency for many of them
to emphasize their Topman activities and behavior. I also took
this into account in analyzing the forms, and assigning each
respondent an "S" or "M" coefficient. Admittedly, this was
a somewhat subjective judgment on my part, but I did it slowly
and carefully, and I feel that if I erred, it was in favor of ac-
cepting these "S" protestations, although they had to be
pretty strong before I would assign that designation. First I
examined the "active interests" (Question 2; "I engage in
the following"). If the pattern was not completely clear from
this, I went to the JO fantasies, and if I could still not make
a determination. I looked at the items used in a solo JO scene.
If the guy used a lot of M toys on himself, I assumed enough
M interest to cast him as "MV2." If I could still not determine
top or bottom, I classified him as "V2," with the "SV2" going
to guys who might previously (for instance in the original
Handbook) have been classified as "M," whom I felt were
honestly capable of going either way, but with a stronger bent
toward being Top. The "S" and the "M" categories were
assigned to men who were clearly oriented toward one or the
other of these poles, almost (or totally) to the exclusion of
the other. On this basis, I obtained the following breakdown
of S vs. M personalities, further divided into age brackets
(N.A. is North
men who America);little
indicated the or"O"no category includes
interaction with those
other
guys:
349
CATEGORICAL BREAKDOWN:
S SVa 1/2 MVa M 0 Total
N.A. 60+ 8 4 8 0 16 12 48
N.A. 50-59 14 14 34 57 55 34 208
N.A. 40-49 48 42 62 74 78 36 340
N.A. 30-39 46 49 121 80 96 28 420
N.A. 21-29 16 18 28 28 68 0 158
Europe 21-60 1 14 14 10 11 0 50
Others 0 4 2 6 0 2 _14
Totals 133 145 269 255 324 112

This further adds: 278 with S interests, vs. 579 with M in-
terests (predominating) with 269 in the middle and 112 who
are more or less inactive.
I feel that this breakdown of S vs. M interests is probably
the most interesting and possibly the most significant statistic
to be pulled from this entire survey. It shows a definite shift
towards S interests from the figures I obtained a decade ago.
At that time, I was speculating that the ratio was on the order
of three to one in favor of the M. That no longer appears to
be the case. And I was not generous in assigning the "S"
or "S1/2M classification. You will also notice, however, that
the largest age group responding to the questionnaire was
the 30 to 39 group, with the 40's being close behind them.
I think this reflects a large influx of "new" people into the
scene over the last ten years. I suspect that many of them
are not greatly concerned with roles, but enjoy the sensual
aspects of the scene, taking it as it comes. There may also
be some sociological pressures at work, causing more men
to generate the "power needs" that push them into the S
role. That, of course, is sheer speculation.
Before going more deeply into the role and fantasy/fetish
analysis, let me give you the extraneous findings that may
be of interest. You can more or less draw your own conclu-
sions as to what these say about our community.
350
 The survey was made a little over a year after the
Reagan/Carter election. The liberal Republican, John Ander-
son, who had officially withdrawn from the race was also on
the ballot in most states, as were a variety of minor party can-
didates. Here's the way our group responded:
Total responding to the survey question: 1074
Voting for Reagan: 370
Voting for Carter: 358
Voting for Anderson: 153
Others: 12

Not voting: 181

From the total sample of 1238 (worldwide), 597 men in-

dicated that they were involved with motorcycles; 514 at-
tended club functions at least occasionally. It was interesting
to note, as well (although I did not have the time and energy
to do an actual breakdown on it), that many of the men who
expressed an active interest in bikes, did not have any in-
terest inthe club activities. In fact, a number of them added
derogatory notations regarding the bike clubs in their areas,
or bike clubs in general. (These negative remarks were not
directed at other groups.)
A very interesting breakdown had to do with education. I
should note that I may have biased the replies by the way
I worded the question, because some college graduates may
have misunderstood "advanced degree," and answered
"yes" because they did not realize that "B.A." or "B.S."
should not qualify. A good number, however, wrote in "M.A.,"
"Ph.D.," "LLD," or "M.D." Keeping that in mind, here's the
result.

EDUCATION:
Less than high school graduates: 24 2% of sample
High school graduate 282 23%
College graduate: 501 40%
Advanced degree: 428 35%
1235 responding

351
 1 also asked if people had a lover, then broke these
responses down by age group:
HAS A LOVER?: Yes No
N.A. 60 + 18 29
N.A. 50-59 72 137
N.A. 40-49 117 224
N.A. 30-39 144 181
N.A. 21-29 71 86
Europe 28 22
Total 450 679

In response to the question regarding the age preference

for a sex partner, I got about the results I expected, although
I was a little surprised that the 30-39 age bracket outdrew
the younger guys. This probably reflects a preference for a
bit of experience at the expense of the fresh-faced, peach
fuzz set. The numbers do not reflect the size of the sample,
because a number of guys specified a preference for part-
ners in more than one age bracket.

AGE PREFERENCE FOR SEX PARTNER.

Age Group Prefers Sex Partner in Age Group:
Responding Under 18 18-29 30-39 40-49 Over 50
N.A. 60 + 4 23 30 16
17 123 37
161 142 78
N.A. 50-59
N.A. 40-49 216 302 262 69
34
N.A. 30-39 48 289 72
304 389
N.A. 21-29 18 123 58 13
131
43
Europe 21-60 2 39 33 8
Totals 123 828 1063 814 256

The readership (which may be of more interest to my

publisher and to me than to most readers) came out as
follows. (Again, the total exceeds the size of the sample,
because a number of people indicated reading more than one
publication.) The high readership on the original Handbook,
of course, results from my mailing the questionnaire into a
hard core of "fans."
352
READERSHIP SURVEY (entire sample):
Leatherman's Handbook 961
Drummer 829
Advocate 630
DungeonMaster 410
Honcho 387
Mandate 263
Numbers 236
In Touch 210
(Write ins:)
Folsom Magazine 77
Mr. SM/Toy (Sweden) 42
Blueboy . 38
SMads 18
PFI Quarterly (piercing) 17
T.R.A.S.H. (was 18 Wheeler) 5

Regularly buy photo magazines: 1003

Prefer drawings to photos: 332

For the information of the reader, I have listed the ad-

dresses for these publications at the end of this Chapter.
Perhaps one of the most surprising statistics obtained was
the breakdown of circumcised vs. uncircumcised men, and
their preference (on this basis) in sex partners. The old
foreskin did not come out as well as I thought it would. More
power to the knife?

CIRCUMCISED VS. UNCIRCUMCISED SURVEY

Circumcised Uncircumcised Total
Men Men Total
Prefer
circumcised
partner 307 32 339
Prefer
uncircumcised
partner 90 41 131
353
 471 256 727
No preference
Total responding 1228

Because I feel that a man's fantasy interests are often a

more accurate reflection of his "soul" than his active
behavior, I picked five items from the list and broke them
down by age group, and expressed them in percents. Some
respondents were disturbed because I included hanging and
murder among the fantasies, but my point was to obtain a
figure, for better or for worse, to indicate the degree of hostility
we might find in the SM group as a whole. I think the figures
are quite interesting. In reading the chart, however, please
bear in mind that the 60 + and Europe categories are quite
small, compared to the others— one confusing aspect to
dealing in percents:

FANTASY INTERESTS,
In Percent of Age Group Responding:

No Slight Moderate Heavy

Interest Interest Interest Interest
Castration
10
N.A. 60 + 66 2 22
10
N.A. 50-59 82 5 3
N.A. 40-49 81 7 5 7
13 13
N.A. 30-39 63 11
20 12
N.A. 21-29 72
Europe
21-60 83
_0_
Entire sample 75 8 11
J3_

Hanging
N.A. 60 + 99 0
N.A. 50-59 83 3
N.A. 40-49 84 5 3
N.A. 30-39 80 8 6
77 8 10
N.A. 21-29
354
 Europe
21-60 75 8 6 11

Entire sample 82 6 5 7

Murder
N.A. 60 + 98 0 0 2
N.A. 50-59 89 8 2 1
V2
N.A. 40-49 95 4 V2
N.A. 30-39 89 5 2 4
N.A. 21-29 86 5 3 6
Europe
21-60 88 8 0 4
Entire sample 90 5 2 3

Bondage 26
18 4
N.A. 60 + 52
12 7 17
N.A. 50-59 15 64
N.A. 40-49 13 3
19 70
69
N.A. 30-39 7 4
N.A. 21-29 2 2 35
Europe 61
72
20
21-60 4 4
Entire sample 9 4 20
67
Whipping 13
13
N.A. 60 + 22 56
17 26 48
N.A. 50-59 9
23
N.A. 40-49 7 7 63
13 23
N.A. 30-39 8 56
10 10 40
N.A. 21-29 54
Europe
29
21-60 8 0 63
26
Entire sample 11 8 55

Because these figures dealt with fantasy, I didn't break

them down by S or M category, as I have with the next items
under consideration. However, there was such a con-
355
sistency, even among the inactive people. I do not think it
would have produced any significant differences. Although
the castration fantasy has a few strong adherents, it is in-
teresting tonote the overwhelming lack of interest on the part
of most people. I included hanging, because I am aware of
the high number of accidental deaths taking place every year,
where guys accidentally hang themselves in the course of
a hot JO session. But again, the interest among the group
as a whole is quite low. The murder category was added only
to ascertain whether this might be the "ultimate" SM fan-
tasy, and as the figures show, it definitely is not. Bondage
and whipping, being two of the prime SM activities, came out
about as one might expect, and with an interesting consis-
tency throughout the entire age range. The European in-
terests are about the same as the North American, but the
sample was relatively small, so I do not think it is fair to draw
any conclusions from it. I did not count the "others" in this
analysis, because I did not know where to fit them. There were
only 14 of these, anyway, so it could not significantly affect
the percentages. Neither did I have enough black or other
racial groups to separate them out. They are simply included
with the rest; however, I might note from my observations
in collating all the statistics, they were consistent in respond-
ing well within the mainstream groupings.
The next two categories are broken down, in percents, and
by both age group and S vs. M interests. I have called these
"fetish attractions," and if the term disturbs you, please see
my explanation in the chapter on fetish interests.

FETISH ATTRACTIONS,
In Percents, Broken Down by Age Strong
No
Slight IModerate
Interest Interest Interest Interest
Leather, uniforms, boots 48
N.A. 60+ 13 4 35
N.A. 50-59 5 3 70
28
21
N.A. 40-49 3 4 18 65
N.A. 30-39 4 2 76

356
 N.A. 21-29 2 3 65
32
Europe
21-60 0 3
32 65
Entire sample 4 3 69
24

Ropes, chains, handcuffs 29

N.A. 60 + 17 4 50
N.A. 50-59 8 11 21 60
10 20
N.A. 40-49 6
6 5 64
55
N.A. 30-39 56
N.A. 21-29 5 1 38
34
Europe 28 56
21-60 8 8
28
Entire sample 8 6 58

Castration
17
N.A. 60 + 74 9 0
10
N.A. 50-59 79 5 6
N.A. 40-49 77 6 8 9
N.A. 30-39 74 9 6
70 14
11
N.A. 21-29 7 9
Europe
72 12 0 16
21-60
76 11
Entire sample 7 6

Chicken (14-17) 78
N.A. 60 + 9 9 4
19
N.A. 50-59 68 4 9
16
N.A. 40-49 64 12 138
17 13
N.A. 30-39 57 18
N.A. 21-29 55 11 16
Europe
21-60 71 17 4 8
18
Entire sample 62 12 11

Now, taking the same data, and breaking it down by SM

interest, we are able to isolate the statistics defining the in-
active men (the "0" category, below), which I feel was the
357
main factor adding bias to the above results, if we want a
true picture of the active SM guy's attractions— or, if you will,
fixations. So here it is with the pie cut in another direction:

FETISH ATTRACTIONS,
In Percents, Broken Down by SM Orientation:

No Slight Moderate Strong

Interest Interest Interest Interest
Leather, uniforms, boots 75
s V2
% 24
SV2 4 1 21 74
to 2 3 24 71
73
23
MV2 2 2
73
M 3 2 22
0 14 7 45
34
Total sample 4 3 24 69

Ropes, chains, Ilandcuffs 26 70

S 3 1
SV2 11 6
31 52
% 11 7 29 53
MV2 1 10 33 56
M 7 4 24 65
29 43
0 7
21
28
Total sample 8 6
58
Castration
12 • 117 18
S 58
SV2 72 7 14
K 77 8 7 8
W/2 74 11 3 12
M 83 5 4 8
73 17
O
76 7 6 11
Total sample

Chicken (14-17) 5
S 59 11 9 5 21

358
 10
SV2 69 13 8
18 13
V2 58 10 11
15 18
MV2 57 10
M 71 8
16 11
0 65 7 12
11 18
Total sample 62 12

Working statistics by hand, without a computer or other

assistance except for an adding machine, had the disadvan-
tage of limiting the number of subjects I was able to analyze.
From the list of active interests, I picked fistfucking, piss
scenes, scat, and piercing, because I was particularly in-
terested incataloguing the interests within our SM commu-
nity. There were no real surprises, but the breakdown by age
group against the figures obtained in an S vs. M analysis is
instructive. In this area, the inactive guys did act to bias the
age breakdown figures significantly, if one is seeking figures
for active participants.

ACTIVE INTERESTS, In Percents, Broken Down by Age:

No Slight Moderate Strong

Interest Interest Interest Interest
Fistfucking
N.A. 60 + 60 20 11 9
18 13
N.A. 50-59 58 11
48 15 19 18
N.A. 40-49 15
40 22 23
N.A. 30-39 25
42 24 9
N.A. 21-29
Europe 20
21-60 68 8 4
48 19 19
Total sample 14

Piss Scenes 15
N.A. 60 + 23 23 39
26 19 24
N.A. 50-59 28
N.A. 40-49 22 14 36
31
26 25
N.A. 30-39 22 27
359
 26 26
N.A. 21-29 26
32
Europe
16 26
21-60 26
23 19 32
Total sample 27
31
Scat Scenes 13 13
N.A. 60 + 66 8
N.A. 50-59 85 7 4 3
76 12 7 5
N.A. 40-49
76 12 8 4
N.A. 30-39
75 18 4 3
N.A. 21-29
Europe 12
10 12
21-60 66
76 7 6 11
Total sample

Piercing 12
N.A. 60 + 69 2 17
73 9 9 9
N.A. 50-59 18 10
12 10
N.A. 40-49
12
N.A. 30-39 60 14 14
75 10
N.A. 21-29 8 7
Europe
18
21-60 56 14 12
13
Total sample 65 11 11

Now, let's take the same figures and break them down by
SM interest, instead of by age. In a couple of categories, there
is a fairly significant difference between Top and bottom in-
terests, and certainly a great deal between the active and
inactive guys.

ACTIVE INTERESTS,
Ip Percents, Broken Down by SM Orientation:

No Slight Moderate Strong

Interest Interest Interest Interest
Fistfucking
S 28 18 20 34

360
 SVfe 33 21 14 32
20
43 19 18
vi 19
40 19
MVfe 22
17 10 14
M 59
15 20
0 87 9 19
48 19 14
Total sample

Piss scenes 19
16 23
S 42
15 26
SVfe 21 38
25 16 25
Vfe
18 19 34
25
MV2 38
M 11 23 35
0 80 11 314
19
Total sample
23
27
31
Scat Scenes 10
15
S 70 5 5
72 10 10
SVfe 8
tie 74 14 7 5
MVfe 76 14 3 7
11
M 77 9 3
0 96 4 0 0
76 12 7 5
Total sample

Piercing 18
18
S 52 12
13 15 10
SVfe 62
Vfe 69 11 11
139 18 10
MVfe 59 10
14 10
M 66 10
0 84 2
13
Total sample 65 11 11

I think these figures pretty well speak for themselves, and

added to the others we've put together here, they4 more or
less emphasize what we've always suspected. I have covered
most of these areas quite completely in their appropriate

361
sections. Now I'll conclude this little numerical exercise with
a survey on drug usage. Judging by the comments many peo-
ple made on their questionnaires, the high or medium usage
applies more to the consistency of use in a scene than to the
heavy use as we normally think of drug "abuse." The alcohol
"booze" figure includes both beer and wine consumption;
my error for not making them separate categories:

DRUG USAGE, IN SM SCENES,

In Percents, Broken Down by Age:
Total
60+ 50-59 40-49 30-39 21-29 Europe Sample
Nitrites
13 48 40 40 15
High 35 39 16 42
Medium 13 10 14 18 14 10
18 7 10 18
Low 8 8
48 28
None 56 37 26 33
36

Marijuana
13 14 23 28 4 24
High 20 19
Medium 13 8 24 31
21 160
13 14
Low 16 19 13 14
40 43
None 58 59 35 38 80

MDA
High 7 2 4 6 4 4 4
13 106
Medium 0 0 5 9 0
10 13
Low 0 7 12 4
None 93 79 75 70 92 80
91

Cocaine
High 4 0 4 5 6 4 4
14 109
Medium 8 3 6 12 0
Low 0 5 10 12 22 4
92
None 82 92 80 71 58 77

Alcohol
High 20 20 26 24 25 8 23
23
Medium 17 24 27 8
34 27
362
 10 10
Low 17 9 8 12
21 76
None 46 48 37 32 38
31

Speed (non-prescription)
High 4 2 4 4 5 4 4
6 10 13 7
Medium 0 0 0
6 8 15 4 7
Low 0 1
None 96 97 78 67
84 92 82
t percent)
(Write in's, in number of incidence, not

60+ 50-59 40-49 30-39 21-29

10
LSD 3 5 9
Quaaludes 2 1 4 1
Mescaline 1
Heroin 1
Downers 1
THC 1 1

All of which gives us an indication of how really light the

drug usage is, when it comes to "hard drugs." Although 67%
use nitrites to some degree, 57% use marijuana, and 62%
use alcohol (probably beer), there is a very low percentage
of use in the other categories. I would also like to remark that
the notations on a number of response sheets gave me a
much better feeling about drug usage within the community
than I previously held. Many of the respondents indicated
quite a sane and moderate use, of even the heavy drugs. I
am left with the impression that the SM portion of the gay
community is probably better off than the younger gays in
general, but probably more inclined to use drugs than the
overall, upper-age-bracket gay man.
So there you have all that I was able to pull out of my ques-
tion airewant
s. I to thank all of the people who were kind
enough to fill out the forms and return them to me, expend-
ing their own stamps to do it. Unfortunately, I did not have
a government grant that allowed me to furnish any strong in-
centive; yet the response was really quite good, except in
Southern California, where I seem to be a prophet in my own
land. Well, so it goes.
363
 Looking to the future, I see a very mixed bag. Because of
the terrible ravages the AIDS epidemic has made— and will
continue to make— within our community, most of my op-
timistic predictions from the original edition of this book must
be seriously reconsidered. It is true that the number of
heterosexuals practicing light bondage or even more severe
forms of SM is on the increase. But it is also true that the
public perception of AIDS as a "gay disease" has undone
a good portion of the public acceptance we gained during
the 70's. The net result of this has been a tendency for the
public at large to return to many of its earlier prejudices—
toward homosexuality in general, and with special scorn
reserved for anyone who engages in particularly "deviant"
behavior. On the other hand, at least within our own (gay)
community, the recognition of many SM activities as "AIDS
benign" is leading to a more positive acceptance.
Be this as it may, the future does not look any more grim
for us than for the gay community in general. I think the moral
rightists have pretty well reached the peak of their power,
and except for local jurisdictions where they will hang on
tenaciously for years to come, the majority of us will be less
subjected to their interference. At least that is my hope. It
distresses me to see someone trying to make "the God of
Love" or "the Prince of Peace" into an avenging angel,
merely to serve the repressed insecurities within the minds
and distorted souls of our TV bible thumpers.
I'll conclude with the promised list of periodical addresses.
If you read enough of them, you will probably catch an arti-
cle or story of mine from time to time. Or you can ask to be
on my mailing list. Either way, I'll try to keep in touch with
you until it's time to do The Leatherman's Handbook III.

Larry Townsend Publications, P.O. Box 302, Beverly Hills, CA

90213
Advocate, P.O. Box 4371 , Los Angeles, CA 90078
Drummer, P.O. Box 11314, San Francisco, CA 94101
Dungeon Master, PO Box 1 1314, San Francisco, CA 94101
Honcho/Mandate, 462 Broadway, New York, NY 10013
Mr.SM/Toy, Revolt Publications, Box 15, Aseda, S-36070 Sweden
T.R.A.S.H., D&W Enterprises, P.O. Box 292, East Rutherford,
NJ 07073
Bound & Gagged, 263-A West 19th St., NYC 10011
ffiWMMtll

BILLED TO YOUR VISA OR MASTERCARDi # CANADIAN CALLERS WELCOME

S3 'PER MIN • YOU MUST BE 18 OR OLDER AND HAVE A TOUCH TONE PHONE
PRICES SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE • ©1993 ALTERNATE LINE, INC.
 PERMANENT INK!
The ink on your skin is pernu
nent — the ink on you T-shir
should be too. Before you dn
your hard-earned cash on
shirt, think about it. Don 't g
garments from some silkscret
scratcher or some fly-by-nigi
fabric vendor. Invest in a qua\
ity tattoo shirt that you '11 i\
just as proud to wear ten yea
from now as you are this wee>
Remember, when it comes \
shirts, professional quality
the only way to go an
INTERNATIONAL TA1
TOO ART stands for quality
Buy from us with confident

RUSH ME MY INTERNATIONAL TATTOO ART T-SHIRT

TODAY! I AM ENCLOSING $15. FOR EACH SHIRT ORDERED
plus $1 .80 P&H (Add an additional $1 . for each
ADDITIONAL SHIRT YOU ORDER.) CANADIAN AND FOREIGN
ORDERS PLEASE ENCLOSE $4. P&H FOR ONE SHIRT AND
$2.50 FOR EACH ADDITIONAL SHIRT.

Number of T-shirts:
SIZE: □ MEDIUM □ LARGE □ X-LG.

Make checks and/or money orders payable to: Jiffy Fulj

fillment, inc., 462 broadway, suite 4000, n.y., n.y.
10013-2618. DO NOT SEND CASH! PAYABLE IN U.S.
FUNDS.
□ VISA □ MASTERCARD
ACC0UNT# Exp. Date
Name
Address - Zip.
City State
Please make sure you have checked the appropriate boxes
and that you have enclosed the correct amount in u.s. funds.
Please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery.
 SUBSCRIBE!
A subscription to INTERNA-
TIONAL TATTOO ART brings
the finest in epidermal illustrations
from all over the world directly to
your front door! And now that
INTERNATIONAL TATTOO

ART is going monthly, you won 't

want to miss a single issue. It's like
taking a global tattoo tour right in
the privacy of your own home.
No other source can match our
worldwide coverage of tattooing
and tattooed people, our in-depth
historical research, our fascinating
interviews with top tattoo artists,
or our lavish printing.
When it comes to tattooing, we
kick butt. At a great, low price.
Don 't miss out!

(If you would like your subscrip-

tion mailed first class or air mail,
please write to us to request the cost
DO IT TODAY! since each country has a different
Send $39.95 for postal rate.)
welve hot issues.
Canada and foreign Subscription orders please call 1-
800-835-2246 ext. 192 Any
orders send $54.95 inquiries should be made to Jiffy
in u.s. funds only.
please do Fulfillment, Inc., 462 Broadway,
Suite 4000, NY., NY., 10013-
■ not send cash. 2618.

\KE CHECKS AND/OR MONEY ORDERS PAYABLE TO: JlFFY FUL-

llment, Inc., 462 Broadway, Suite 4000, N.Y., N.Y.
)0 13-26 18. DO NOT SEND CASH! PAYABLE IN U.S.
JNDS.
VISA Q MASTERCARD
:count# EXP. DATE
\ME
DDRESS _
TY State Zip

Please make sure you have checked the appropriate boxes

and that you have enclosed the correct amount in u.s. funds.
Please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery.
 If you've enjoyed
THE LEATHERMAIsrS HANDBOOK I
nal
you ii love tne original
THE LEATHERMANS HANDBOOK

The Leatherman's Handbook II picks up the

leather scene twenty years after the original
Handbook. This earlier volume describes in
intimate detail many of the activities that
were popular in the more formulative years
of leathersex. It contains the same type of
story/ vignettes, goes into great detail in
many different areas, and includes some
important safety tips. If you're even mar-
ginally involved in our scene, you must read
this earlier effort - the book that started it
all. Re-issued in a new, slick format -
complete and unexpergated. (ISBN:1-881684-
03-2 - 319 pages, $11.95)
TO: Larry Townsend, POB 302, Beverly Hills
CA 90213
Please send _ copies of The Leather-
man's Handbook I enclose $11.95 plus $2.
postage for each. I am over 21 years of age.
Signature:
Name (printed):
Address:
City,State,ZIP:
Ittiratintptefely new sequel to
THE LEATHIRMANS HANDBOOK
reveals all the secrets of the
underground world of leather and
S&M practices. The experienced
practitioner will discover new
advanced refinements and the
novice will learn the ropes
from the ground up.
All the elements of fetish, fantasy,
master/slave relationships and
role playing techniques both
simple and advanced are given
an in-depth treatment hy one of
the worlds foremost authorities.
This book contains up to date
explorations of booze, drugs
and health for the gay male S&M
practitioner and complete
statistics on S&M preferences.
Now, more than ever before,
THE LEATHIRMANS HANDBOOK II
tells you what to look for, where
to find it, and how to do it when
you've found it. This is the
definitive book in its field.

09999

o "71829"00599M 6