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This report details a student's six-month work experience at a local company, focusing on customizing English lessons and attending seminars. The experience was deemed valuable for developing essential skills and applying theoretical knowledge in practice. Recommendations for improvement include implementing a systematic appraisal system for performance evaluation and providing detailed feedback.

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Cheshire Chai
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Question

This report details a student's six-month work experience at a local company, focusing on customizing English lessons and attending seminars. The experience was deemed valuable for developing essential skills and applying theoretical knowledge in practice. Recommendations for improvement include implementing a systematic appraisal system for performance evaluation and providing detailed feedback.

Uploaded by

Cheshire Chai
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Question:

You are a student at an international college. For the last six


months you have spent two days a week doing work experience
with a local company. Your course director at college has now
asked you to write a report about your work experience.
Your report should describe the work you did, say whether you
think this work experience was a valuable part of your studies and
suggest ways in which the organisation of the work experience
could be improved.
Write your report.

My response:
Introduction:
This report centers around my working experience with a local
company for the last six months, including work contents, whether
it is worthy and ways of improving the organization of this
experience.

Work Contents:
As a sophomore majoring in English Teaching, my main
responsibility is to customize VIP English lessons in alignment
with individual needs from our customers. Simultaneously, I’ve
attended a number of academic seminars to better ameliorate
our products and improve their competitiveness through devising
marketing campaigns with my colleagues.

Value Of Work Experience:


Frankly speaking, if it weren’t for this work experience, I wouldn’t
have had developed so many valuable work contacts and
indispensable skills like effective communication, strategic
planning, etc.
However, what really made it a worthwhile journey of my studies
is that the elation you got when you put those dreary theories in
your textbooks into real practice. Unlike examinations, there’s no
chance you’ll pull off every sale just with a pen and strong
memory. It was a matter of switching your mindset from
idealization to pragmatism and learning little by little every time.

Recommendations for improvement:


The company could make its work appraisal more systematic by
quantifying our performance with different criteria and providing
detailed feedback, which will serve a good purpose by giving us a
clear message of our strengths and weaknesses.

Conclusion:
In conclusion, my work experience was a valuable addition to my
studies, offering practical skills and industry insights. With some
improvements to the organization of the program, it could become
an even more effective learning opportunity for future students.

(260 Words.)

Your report is well-structured and addresses the task effectively.


Below is a detailed evaluation based on the **Cambridge
Advanced English (CAE) Writing Part 2 assessment criteria**,
along with feedback and suggestions for improvement:
---

### **1. Content**


**Strengths**:
- You have fully addressed all parts of the task: describing the
work you did, evaluating its value, and suggesting improvements.
- The content is relevant and well-developed, with specific
examples (e.g., customizing VIP English lessons, attending
seminars, and devising marketing campaigns).
- The purpose of the report is clear: to inform your course director
about your experience and suggest improvements.

**Suggestions for Improvement**:


- While you mention "valuable work contacts" and "indispensable
skills," you could elaborate further on how these skills directly
relate to your studies or future career. For example, how does
strategic planning or effective communication tie into English
Teaching?
- The recommendation for improvement is good but could be
expanded. For instance, you could suggest specific criteria for
performance evaluation (e.g., customer feedback, lesson quality,
or campaign success rates).

---

### **2. Communicative Achievement**


**Strengths**:
- The tone is appropriate for a formal report, and the language is
clear and professional.
- The format is suitable, with clear headings (Introduction, Work
Contents, Value of Work Experience, Recommendations for
Improvement, Conclusion).
- The report achieves its purpose effectively by providing a
balanced view of your experience and offering constructive
suggestions.
**Suggestions for Improvement**:
- The phrase "if it weren’t for this work experience, I wouldn’t have
had developed" is slightly awkward. Consider rephrasing to: "If it
weren’t for this work experience, I wouldn’t have developed..."
- The phrase "the elation you got" is informal. Replace "you" with
"I" to maintain a formal tone: "the elation I felt."
- Avoid contractions like "it's" or "you'll" in formal writing. For
example, replace "you'll pull off" with "one can achieve."

---

### **3. Organization**


**Strengths**:
- The report is logically organized, with clear sections and a
coherent flow of ideas.
- Each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, and the
conclusion effectively summarizes the report.
- Linking phrases like "Frankly speaking," "However," and "In
conclusion" help connect ideas smoothly.

**Suggestions for Improvement**:


- The introduction could be more engaging. Instead of simply
stating what the report will cover, you could briefly highlight the
most significant aspect of your experience (e.g., "This report
outlines my six-month work experience at a local company, which
proved to be an invaluable opportunity to bridge the gap between
academic theory and real-world practice.").
- Consider adding a transition sentence at the end of the "Work
Contents" section to lead into the "Value of Work Experience"
section (e.g., "This hands-on experience not only enhanced my
professional skills but also provided valuable insights into the
practical application of my studies.").

---
### **4. Language**
**Strengths**:
- You use a range of vocabulary (e.g., "ameliorate," "pragmatism,"
"systematic") and grammatical structures (e.g., conditional
sentences, passive voice).
- The language is generally accurate and appropriate for the task.
- There are minimal spelling or punctuation errors.

**Suggestions for Improvement**:


- Some phrases could be more concise. For example, "including
work contents, whether it is worthy and ways of improving the
organization of this experience" could be rephrased as "including
the work I undertook, its value, and recommendations for
improvement."
- The phrase "attended a number of academic seminars to better
ameliorate our products" could be simplified to "attended
academic seminars to improve our products."
- Avoid overusing adverbs like "really" or "frankly speaking," as
they can sound informal.

---

### **Overall Band Score and Feedback**


Based on the CAE assessment criteria, your report would likely
score in the **upper range of Band 4 (Good to Very Good)**.
Here's why:
- **Strengths**: The report is well-structured, addresses the task
fully, and uses a range of vocabulary and grammar. The tone is
appropriate, and the ideas are logically organized.
- **Areas for Improvement**: To achieve a higher score, focus on
refining the language for formality and precision, expanding on
key points (e.g., the value of the experience and
recommendations), and ensuring smoother transitions between
sections.
---

### **Revised Version (Key Improvements)**


**Introduction**:
This report outlines my six-month work experience at a local
company, which proved to be an invaluable opportunity to bridge
the gap between academic theory and real-world practice. It will
describe the work I undertook, evaluate its value to my studies,
and suggest ways to improve the organization of the program.

**Work Contents**:
As a sophomore majoring in English Teaching, my primary
responsibility was to customize VIP English lessons tailored to
individual customer needs. Additionally, I attended academic
seminars to enhance our products and collaborated with
colleagues to devise marketing campaigns, thereby improving the
company’s competitiveness.

**Value of Work Experience**:


This experience allowed me to develop essential skills such as
effective communication and strategic planning, which are directly
applicable to my studies and future career. More importantly, it
provided a platform to apply theoretical knowledge from my
textbooks to real-world scenarios. Unlike academic examinations,
success in this role required a pragmatic mindset and the ability to
adapt to challenges, which significantly enriched my learning
journey.

**Recommendations for Improvement**:


To enhance the program, the company could implement a more
systematic appraisal system. For instance, performance could be
evaluated based on specific criteria such as customer feedback,
lesson quality, and campaign success rates. Detailed feedback on
strengths and areas for improvement would provide participants
with a clearer understanding of their progress.

**Conclusion**:
In conclusion, my work experience was a valuable addition to my
studies, offering practical skills and industry insights. With the
suggested improvements, the program could become an even
more effective learning opportunity for future students.

---

This revised version addresses the feedback and aligns more


closely with the CAE assessment criteria. Let me know if you'd
like further clarification or additional suggestions!

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