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The document is a guide on conflict management and negotiation strategies, emphasizing that negotiation is a pervasive part of human interaction. It highlights the importance of understanding personal attributes and the dynamics of negotiation to achieve effective outcomes. The text also discusses the complexities of negotiation, including the influence of personality, values, and the necessity of ethical practices in achieving mutually beneficial agreements.

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100% found this document useful (4 votes)
26 views

Conflict Management: A Practical Guide to Developing Negotiation Strategies 1st Edition - eBook PDF pdf download

The document is a guide on conflict management and negotiation strategies, emphasizing that negotiation is a pervasive part of human interaction. It highlights the importance of understanding personal attributes and the dynamics of negotiation to achieve effective outcomes. The text also discusses the complexities of negotiation, including the influence of personality, values, and the necessity of ethical practices in achieving mutually beneficial agreements.

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wuxinorget
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© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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Pearson New International Edition

Conflict Management: A Practical Guide


to Developing Negotiation Strategies
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette
First Edition
Pearson Education Limited
Edinburgh Gate
Harlow
Essex CM20 2JE
England and Associated Companies throughout the world

Visit us on the World Wide Web at: www.pearsoned.co.uk

© Pearson Education Limited 2014

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted
in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without either the
prior written permission of the publisher or a licence permitting restricted copying in the United Kingdom
issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency Ltd, Saffron House, 6–10 Kirby Street, London EC1N 8TS.

All trademarks used herein are the property of their respective owners. The use of any trademark
in this text does not vest in the author or publisher any trademark ownership rights in such
trademarks, nor does the use of such trademarks imply any affiliation with or endorsement of this
book by such owners.

ISBN 10: 1-292-03999-X


ISBN 10: 1-269-37450-8
ISBN 13: 978-1-292-03999-2
ISBN 13: 978-1-269-37450-7

British Library Cataloguing-in-Publication Data


A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

Printed in the United States of America


P E A R S O N C U S T O M L I B R A R Y

Table of Contents

1. Defining Negotiation and Its Components


Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 1
2. Personality
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 11
3. Conflict
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 33
4. Negotiation Style
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 57
5. Key Negotiating Temperaments
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 77
6. Communicating in Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 91
7. A Note on Cultural and Gender Differences
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 107
8. Interests and Goals in Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 117
9. Understanding the Importance of Perception in Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 129
10. Effects of Power in Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 145
11. Asserting Yourself
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 161
12. Principles of Persuasion
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 177
13. Rules of Negotiation and Common Mistakes
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 197

I
14. The Negotiation Process and Preparation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 207
15. Alternative Styles, Strategies, and Techniques of Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 219
16. Team Negotiation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 239
17. Third Party Intervention
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 247
18. Using Your Personal Negotiating Power
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 255
19. Post Negotiation Evaluation
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 273
References and Selected Bibliography
Barbara A. Budjac Corvette 281
Index 291

II
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Robert

PERFORMANCE COMPETENCIES FOR THIS CHAPTER


● To understand the definition and magnitude of negotiation
“All
● To understand that there are limits to what is negotiable
the world’s
● To identify the components of negotiation performance a stage.”
● To identify the steps necessary to develop your effective
William Shakespeare
personal negotiating power

From Conflict Management: A Practical Guide to Developing Negotiation Strategies. Barbara A. Budjac
Corvette. Copyright © 2007 by Pearson Prentice Hall. All rights reserved.

1
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

ALL HUMAN INTERACTION IS NEGOTIATION


Whatever the nature of your business, profession, or current
pursuits, you encounter conflict and you negotiate. Life is filled
with human interaction and human interaction is essentially a
negotiating arena. Other people influence our emotions and behav-
ior, and we influence the emotions and behavior of others. We par-
ticipate in a continuum of perceiving others and forming attitudes
toward people, things, and concepts while others are perceiving
and forming attitudes about us.
In the course of our daily business, professional, and personal
lives, we regularly seek to affect the attitudes and behavior of
others. At times we seek approval, recognition, or affection. At
times we seek to cause action by others. At times we seek to gain
the right or privilege to take certain actions ourselves. At times we
seek to obtain money or other tangible value. In our interactions
with friends, family, clients, employees, employers, contractors, ser-
vice providers, professionals, merchants, and business associates, we
use information and knowledge to get what we want. Negotiation is
that process of influencing others in order to get what we want.
We negotiate much more often than we may realize. Effective,
ethical negotiation is not intimidation, nor is it chiseling or trickery.
Rather, effective negotiation is using knowledge of self and others
combined with analysis of information and time, thereby tapping
the power to affect behavior. The application of that knowledge and
information comprises the personal power to win in any negotia-
tion. In effective, ethical negotiation, both sides win. That concept is
merely a restatement of the business tenet that it is not a good deal
unless it is a good deal for all sides.
It is, perhaps, easiest to accept the notion in the foregoing and
come to a definition of negotiation by further considering what nego-
tiation is not. Negotiation is not a game. Negotiation is not always a
formal process nor in a formal setting. Negotiation is not limited to
business transactions. Negotiation is not conducted solely for tangible
things we can see and touch. Negotiation is not simply using power-
over tactics—shouting louder or bullying better. Negotiation is not a
prescribed set of universally applicable maxims or precepts. That hav-
ing been said, however, it must be noted that power-over tactics are
sometimes used in ostensible negotiation; and, there are indeed, rules
KEY TERM
Negotiation is an and customs often observed in negotiation.
effort to influence Negotiation is the process of interacting with the goal of obtain-
or persuade. ing agreement or the result you desire.

2
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

It is an interpersonal skill that is not the province of any


particular profession. However, it is extremely important to
personal interaction, business and organizational management
success, and leadership.
Negotiation is an art. Negotiation may also be considered
scientific—having principles and methods that are used systemati-
cally through training and experience. Many people believe that
negotiation is difficult and that it is just easier to avoid it or always
compromise their desires. Others believe that if someone would just
tell them the rules they could be effective! There are few universally
applicable rules. The rules that do exist provide only general guide-
lines that must be applied to specific circumstances and specific
individuals.
Negotiation is complex and interdisciplinary. It encompasses
conflict assessment, management, and resolution. Negotiation is
complex primarily because it happens between human beings!
Above all, negotiation is personal and individual. It is subject to,
understood, and effectuated by the same psychological and socio-
logical principles and theories that govern social interactions gen-
erally. Once one understands the application of those principles,
negotiation becomes much less complex and intimidating.
After understanding what it is, it is easy to see the magnitude of
negotiation. Every day in all aspects of our lives we negotiate. Think
of one time today when you tried to influence someone. Perhaps it
was a family member. Perhaps it was a coworker. Perhaps it was
your boss. Perhaps it was a stranger. You may have tried to cause
someone to behave in a particular way. You may have tried to cause
someone to think in a particular way. If so, you were negotiating. Do
you recall a time when you wanted someone to think you not rude?
If you attempted to affect that person’s opinion—to have them
agree with your self-perception—you were negotiating.
As human beings we seek psychological consistency and bal-
ance. We want things to make sense. We want our way. We want to
be satisfied. While there is much to explore in that vein, it will suf-
fice for this chapter to understand that the conflict inherent in the
need for psychological consistency triggers attempts to influence. KEY CONCEPT
That is, it triggers the need or opportunity to negotiate. Have you All interaction is
ever considered that life would be simple but for human beings? negotiation.
The pervasiveness of negotiation underscores its importance.
The good news, however, is that you have ample opportunity to
apply what you learn about negotiation. You may—and should—
practice every day. Improving your interactions generally will also
improve your negotiation effectiveness.

3
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

THE PERSONAL NATURE OF NEGOTIATION


The heart of negotiation may be said to be the heart of the individuals
involved. What is commonly referred to as the heart is usually what
makes negotiation feel difficult. Our emotions, temperament, disposi-
tion, and other aspects of our personalities give each of us unique
needs, interests, goals, and perspectives. Our needs and desires
invoke our ego and our self-concept as well as our fears. These
attributes, or phenomena, are actually based in the brain, of course.
It is not uncommon for people to believe that they negotiate effec-
tively on behalf of others while not doing so well for themselves. Why
the difference? We may say the heart or, more appropriately, the ego is
the difference. It is, to a great extent. However, it is probable that if we
are ineffective as our own advocates, we are probably not performing
HOT TIP!
Practice at our maximum effectiveness for others either. Once you learn to
negotiation in understand yourself, you will get to the heart of negotiating. It will
personal settings. take some effort but your results will be satisfying.

NOT EVERYTHING IS NEGOTIABLE


It seems common to hear that everything is negotiable. Well, that
is just not true! Would you sell your child or your pet? Would you
compromise the health of your child or your pet? If you said,
“No,” then you see that, contrary to popular statements that
everything is negotiable, it is not! If you said, “Yes,” then recognize
that negotiation requires a minimum of two people and that your
counterpart is likely to hold some things to be nonnegotiable. If
your reaction here is that these examples are extreme, ponder the
issue further. If one has no values, beliefs, or options, then
everything might be negotiable. The key here is to identify your
personal ethics, moral code, and values as you consider
negotiation options.
In addition to those abiding factors, each potential negotiation
must be analyzed to determine whether or not the matter should be
negotiated. If there is not a potential for a mutual beneficial
exchange that leaves the parties better off than not negotiating, then
KEY POINT
Identify the matter should not be negotiated. This principle should become
alternatives prior clear as you proceed through your study of negotiation and begin
to negotiating. to prepare for each negotiation.

4
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

CONSCIOUS AND UNCONSCIOUS DETERMINANTS OF YOUR


NEGOTIATION PERFORMANCE
Facts and circumstances, including relative power, as well as time
constraints, of course, affect negotiation options and outcomes.
However, our human interaction is affected by who we are and with
whom we interact. Personality and temperament, values and beliefs,
perception, attitudes, style of learning, motivation, way of thinking,
style of communication, approach to conflict, fears, and much more
determine who we are in any human interaction. We are shaped by
our experiences. We often unconsciously adopt the attributes of sig-
nificant others in our life. Each one of us has a unique combination
of attributes that serve as the base for our personal power.
We are not always conscious of these attributes and characteris-
tics or the other factors inherent in negotiation. We must know who
we are if we are to use our strengths. We must know who we are if
we want to consciously develop the attributes we desire. We must
also be aware of certain psychological phenomena that may cause
us to believe things that are not so. Sometimes we suffer from dis-
tortions in our perceptions and thinking that cause us to miss
opportunities and make poor choices in negotiation.

WHAT YOU DO NOT KNOW WILL HURT YOU


In addition to causing poor choices, what we do not know can hurt us
in other, more subtle ways. Even if we are not conscious of our every-
day negotiation interactions, we develop patterns and habits. We are
also subject to what is called social learning (Bandura 1977). We learn
both by observing and doing. In the negotiating arena, this can mean
that we imitate the behaviors of those with whom we have negotiated
previously. We are particularly likely to adopt behavior exhibited by
others that we view as generating a positive outcome for them.
Therefore, if you have often felt like the loser in prior negotia-
tions, you may begin to utilize the same tactics that were used to
gain an advantage over you. There are several problems associ-
ated with doing so. Feeling like a loser reflects a competitive,
gamelike, or win/lose approach. While that is one of the four
approaches available for negotiation, it is usually the most inap-
propriate and ineffective one. Perhaps you felt like your prior

5
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

negotiations were fair for both sides and you, therefore, have
fallen into a pattern of compromising. While such an approach is
not competitive, it, too, is not usually the most appropriate or
effective approach. Perhaps you have been met in the past with
individuals unwilling to negotiate and now you find yourself
falling into a pattern of avoidance. Obviously, you cannot get what
you want unless you try.
Another problem in copying the negotiating behavior of others
is that you are a different person and those tactics may not work
well for you. The tactics may actually be inappropriate but worked
on you for any number of reasons—lack of preparation, lack of
confidence, fear, the particular situation or circumstances, to name
a few.
These patterns are difficult to change. Until we become con-
scious of our self and our actions, we cannot assess the extent of our
effectiveness. Our level of experience is irrelevant to this quest.
A person who has been negotiating formally for twenty years is not
necessarily being effective. She may have been making the same
mistakes for twenty years! If we get different results for others than
for ourselves, we need to examine why.

COMPONENTS OF NEGOTIATION PERFORMANCE


The components of negotiation performance, then, include
personality, approach, style, temperament, perceptions, interests,
goals, needs, values, and powers—of all parties involved. Addi-
tional components include the substantive issues, the nature of the
conflict, the effects of the conflict, and the alternatives for all parties
involved. Components also include the persuasive abilities of all
parties involved.

HOW TO DEVELOP YOUR EFFECTIVE PERSONAL NEGOTIATING POWER


Knowledge of human behavior is essential to achieving effective
negotiation skills. Effective negotiation requires knowledge of self
in all of the aspects noted in the preceding subsections as well as
knowledge of others. You must know yourself before you may
know or understand others. You must become aware of your
thought patterns and how they affect your goals and behaviors. You
must become aware of your behaviors and how you are perceived

6
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

by others. You must also acquire knowledge of the nature of


conflict, principles of communication and persuasion, and methods
for gathering and analyzing information. Effective negotiation also
requires critical thinking and creativity.
Psychological and sociological theories provide insight into
how we know ourselves and others. The study of psychological and
sociological principles combined with self-assessment and practice
will guide you to increased effectiveness. Practice of your new
knowledge on your own account—where your heart and ego are “It is easier to be
involved—will generate the greatest gain because it is there where wise for others than
you can discover who you are and your greatest fears. Since you for ourselves.”
negotiate every day, use those everyday experiences on your own La Rochefoucauld
behalf to apply your knowledge and practice your skills.
The study of principles of communication and persuasion com-
bined with self-assessment and practice will guide us to increased
effectiveness. The study of conflict combined with an assessment of
our approach to conflict—and practice—will also guide us to
increased effectiveness.
Critical thinking requires an inquisitive mind—asking why and
how. It requires openness to options. It requires knowing oneself—
one’s biases, prejudices, and beliefs. It requires challenging precon-
ceptions and assumptions. It requires multifarious, empathetic,
comparative, and integrative thinking. The effectiveness of and the
mutual gain derived in a negotiation correspond with the level of
creativity applied.

A GENERAL PLAN TO DEVELOP YOUR EFFECTIVE


PERSONALIZED NEGOTIATION STRATEGIES
Presented in the following list are fifteen steps that will enable you
to use your personal negotiating power.
1. Practice critical thinking and empathy.
2. Study and understand key principles from psychological,
sociological, communication, and conflict theories.
3. Know yourself.
4. Understand the dynamics of conflict.
5. Know major negotiation styles and temperaments and how to
interact with each of them.
6. Communicate effectively, allowing for differing perceptions,
biases, and prejudices.

7
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

7. Acknowledge cultural and contextual expectations.


8. Understand the dynamics of power.
9. Identify interests and goals.
10. Be assertive.
11. Be persuasive.
12. Be thoroughly prepared and avoid common mistakes.
13. Use tactics that suit you and understand tactics used by others.
14. Know when to walk away as well as when and how to use third-
party help.
15. Know how to evaluate your performance and target
improvements.
After mastering these fifteen items, then you must—
Practice. Evaluate. Practice. Evaluate.
Change?
Practice. Evaluate. Practice.

A BEGINNING
Start working on your critical thinking and self-knowledge by ask-
ing yourself the following two questions.
● What do I know?
“To be absolutely ● How do I know what I know?
certain about
something, one
Performance Checklist
must know
everything or ✓ All human interaction is negotiation. Negotiation is the
nothing about it.” process of interacting with a goal and encompasses conflict
Henry A. Kissinger management and resolution.
✓ Not everything is negotiable. Not everything should be nego-
tiated.
✓ The components of negotiation include the individual person-
alities involved, interests, goals, needs, values, perceptions,
power, substantive issues, alternatives, context, communica-
tion, and persuasion. What we do not know about ourselves
and our habits may lessen our effectiveness and inhibit our
development.
✓ Critical steps in becoming more effective in negotiation are to
know yourself, understand the process of conflict and negoti-
ation, control yourself, and do what feels natural for you.
Developing personalized negotiation strategies requires

8
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

critical thinking and creativity, self-assessment, study, appli-


cation of knowledge, and practice.

Key Terms, Phrases, and Concepts


Negotiation
Mutual Beneficial Exchange
Unconscious Determinants of Negotiation Performance

Review Questions
Mark each of questions 1 through 5 as True (T) or False (F) and
answer questions 6 through 10.
T F 1. All human interaction may be considered negotiation.
___________
T F 2. Negotiation is an effort to influence. ___________
T F 3. Negotiation is an art and a science. ___________
T F 4. Everything is negotiable. ___________
T F 5. Everything should be negotiated. ___________
6. Explain how and why negotiation is not subject to fixed
rules or methods. ___________
7. Why is your personal life a good place to practice
building your negotiation skills? ___________
8. How can your ego interfere with your negotiation
performance? ___________
9. What kinds of things or factors of which you may not
currently be aware may affect your negotiation
performance? Why? ___________
10. List ten components of negotiation performance.
___________

Case 1
Assume that you own and operate a business. Your production this
year was based on prior years’ experience. You have been left, how-
ever, with 100,000 unsold units on hand. You have been selling your
product at $5 each and expected the same price for these 100,000
units. You have exhausted all avenues you can think of for dispos-
ing of your excess product. You do not have the storage capacity for
keeping these units in inventory while you continue production.

9
Defining Negotiation and Its Components

This morning a giant retail organization contacted you urgently


seeking the type of product you produce to fill deficits in their
supply. They offer to pay you $3 per unit.

Case Discussion Questions


1. How would you assess whether or not you should negotiate?
Identify the factors you would consider and the overall rule
you would apply.
2. What factors can you readily identify that will affect your nego-
tiation options and outcomes?
3. What unconscious factors might also affect your negotiation
performance?

10
k
tterstoc
rn/Shu
n Cobu
Stephe

PERFORMANCE COMPETENCIES FOR THIS CHAPTER


● To learn what comprises personality
● To learn key aspects of major personality theories most
relevant to conflict, negotiation, and persuasion
● To assess key aspects of your personality
“Thales was asked
what was most
difficult to man; he
answered: ‘To know
one’s self.’”
Diogenes

From Conflict Management: A Practical Guide to Developing Negotiation Strategies. Barbara A. Budjac
Corvette. Copyright © 2007 by Pearson Prentice Hall. All rights reserved.

11
Personality

In this chapter we review aspects of personality that relate to the


dynamics of conflict, negotiation, and persuasion. Major personal-
ity theories are synthesized and presented for your use in self-
understanding. First, we define personality and then proceed to
specific characteristics that impact your negotiation behavior. You
are urged to assess your personality relative to the factors and
characteristics presented here. In this chapter you assess yourself.

WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO KNOW YOUR PERSONALITY


“Every man has People interact in negotiation. “Human interaction” may more
three characters— appropriately be one word. It is difficult to separate the interaction
that which he from the people. Your negotiating success depends upon an accu-
exhibits, that which rate understanding of and use of your unique personality type and
he has, and that style of interaction as well as an accurate perception and under-
which he thinks he standing of others’ personality types and styles. Knowing yourself
is a prerequisite to knowing others. Knowing yourself is also a pre-
has.”
requisite for tapping your personal power to maximize your effec-
Alphonse Karr tiveness in any human interaction.

DEFINING PERSONALITY: ONE SIZE DOES NOT FIT ALL


Personality may be described as the dynamic, developing system of
an individual’s distinctive emotional, cognitive, and spiritual
attributes. That definition purposefully does not limit personality to
characteristic behaviors and/or thoughts, because there abound
many perceptions of what should be deemed characteristic.1 Nev-
ertheless, we will be discussing matters in terms of characteristics.

1
This definition also recognizes the predominant view on nature versus nurture—that
personality is the result of a dynamic interaction among genes and environment (including
the situation).

12
Personality

There exist many schools of thought and approaches to


analyzing personality. It is neither possible nor necessary to review
personality exhaustively here. We address key portions of those
theories most relevant to the dynamics of human interaction gener-
ally and negotiation particularly. We view personality from a human
development perspective. Implicit in such a view is the recognition
that personality changes (or can change) over the life span. You have
the power and ability to develop traits, characteristics, and aspects
of your self. Also implicit in such a view is that behavior occurs (or
may occur) relative to circumstances. You may demonstrate varying
aspects or characteristics of your personality in varying circum-
stances and/or with varying other people. Culture also affects
development of certain personality characteristics. Having knowl-
edge of these variations is a prerequisite to assessing the reasons and
propriety for variations—and to changing your behavior.

FACETS OF PERSONALITY THAT AFFECT YOUR


NEGOTIATION APPROACH AND TEMPERAMENT
In this section we investigate key facets of personality that affect
your interaction in negotiation: emotional stability; conscientious-
ness; locus of control; self-monitoring; competitiveness and types
A and B; need for achievement, power, and affiliation; Machiavel-
lianism; Jungian personality preferences of extroversion, introver-
sion, cognitive processing style, and orientation to others; learning
style; right-brain/left-brain dominance; creativity; charisma; and
emotional intelligence.
Everyone possesses each of the facets and traits to some degree.
You will find that some traits are similar to each other. You may
even think that some describe the same trait or characteristic by a
different name. Examining each of them will help you to find your
personal negotiating style and power as well as help you to identify
and develop into the negotiator you desire to be. You will likely find
a balance in the combination of traits and characteristics you pos-
sess and exhibit. Your task here is to assess the relative strength of
each in order to gain understanding of particular strengths and
weaknesses in your interactions. As you study each section, try to
honestly assess yourself. A profile form (Exhibit 1) is included for
use in recording your self-assessments.

13
Personality

EXHIBIT 1
Personal Profile of Negotiating Personality Attributes
Personal profile of negotiating personality attributes.
Emotional stability High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Conscientiousness High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Internal locus of control High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
External locus of control High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Locus of control is primarily Internal ___________ External ___________

Self-monitoring High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________


Type A High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Type B High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Competitiveness High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Achievement need High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Personal power need High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Social power need High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Affiliation need High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Among the need for achievement, personal power, social power, and affiliation, the strongest is:
Achievement ___________ Personal ___________ Social ___________ Affiliation ___________
Machiavellianism High ___________ Moderate ___________ Relatively low ___________
Personal source of energy Extroverted ___________ Introverted ___________
Preference for taking in information Sensing ___________ Intuiting ___________
Preference in rational functioning Thinking ___________ Feeling ___________
Preference for external interaction Judging ___________ Perceiving ___________
Primary learning style Accommodating ___________
Diverging ___________
Converging ___________
Assimilating ___________
Preference for activities utilizing Right brain ___________ Left brain ___________

Creativity High ___________ Moderate ___________ Fairly low ___________


Charisma High ___________ Moderate ___________ Fairly low ___________
Emotional intelligence High ___________ Moderate ___________ Fairly low ___________
Consistency check
Review your profile for sense and consistency. Note the following expected relationships:
Accommodating learning style with sensing
Assimilating learning style with intuiting
Left-brain dominance and sensing and thinking
Right-brain dominance and intuiting and feeling
Right-brain dominance and creativity

14
Personality

LEARNING THEORY AND ASSESSING YOURSELF


None of the characteristics should be viewed as good or bad but
merely as different! As you assess yourself, try not to react to the
particular terms used by theorists to identify various traits and
attributes. Try to understand the nature of and behavioral impact of
the personality facets. Also recognize that we each have a tendency
to see ourselves as already possessing traits we admire and that we
tend to dislike things about us that we have designated as wanting
to change. Honesty is necessary. “He who knows
Tests and scales have been developed for measuring most of the himself best
facets of personality addressed here. Some are published, and some esteems himself
are not.2 Some are statistically validated, while others are not. least.”
Although the exercises offered here are not of the magnitude to
H. G. Bohn
assure general reliability, they are designed to assist you in your
private introspection.3

EMOTIONAL STABILITY AND CONSCIENTIOUSNESS


The terms emotional stability and conscientiousness come from
what is well known as the Big Five model (Digman 1990) of person-
ality theory.4 Reflect on the following statements and decide
whether they are usually more descriptive or less descriptive of
you. It may be helpful to also ask someone else to tell you how
descriptive these statements are of you.
● I worry a lot.
● I experience distress and tension often.
● I get upset rather easily and quickly.
● I tend to be moody.
● I do not remain calm in tense situations.
● I get nervous easily.
● I often find it difficult to control my temper.

2
Most such tests may be administrated only by professionals licensed in the state where you
reside, and assessment materials may be difficult to find. However, the material in appendix A
will guide you in locating relevant material.
3
It is recognized that when an individual makes him/herself public, as, for example, in a
questionnaire to be scored by another, it is possible to skew the results (see, e.g., Schwarz
1999). If one attempts to present a desired self, the results are not accurate. It is quite possible
that educated, honest self-assessment is the most reliable of all assessments.
4
See also Hurtz and Donovan (2000); and Raymark, Schmidt, and Guion (1997).

15
Personality

This first dimension of personality is used to describe your


behavior under distress. If, more often than not, you remain
unchanged, calm, collected, and confident when confronted with
unexpected stressors, then you should probably assess yourself as
having high emotional stability. If, on the other hand, unexpected
stressors typically cause you to feel very anxious, nervous, or tense
or cause you to lose confidence or otherwise change your behavior
in negative ways and you found the foregoing statements to be
fairly descriptive of you, then you might assess yourself as having
relatively low emotional stability.
Now consider the next group of statements and decide whether
they are more or less descriptive of your typical behavior. Again, the
assessment of someone who has substantial experience with you
may help.
● I am always careful and thorough.
● I plan.
● I organize.
● I am efficient.
● I am reliable.
● I am industrious.
● I persevere and follow things through to completion.
If you typically are not dependable, are easily distracted or disor-
ganized, miss deadlines, procrastinate, abandon or fail to complete
projects, tasks, or assignments, then you should probably assess your-
self relatively low on conscientiousness. If you are very dependable,
organized and focused, always meet deadlines, complete projects and
plans, and seek high levels of competence and believe that the fore-
going statements describe your usual behavior very well, you should
probably assess yourself extremely high on conscientiousness.

LOCUS OF CONTROL
Please complete Exercise 1 prior to reading further.

Exercise 1
Think of three times recently when things did not go your way or
did not turn out as well as you had hoped. Write down each one.
Next, consider the first incident. What is your immediate thought
to explain the disappointing outcome? Do not think long about this.
Simply record your first thought.

16
Personality

Do the same with incidents 2 and 3.


Now, think of two more incidents and, again, record your
reasons for the outcome in each.

The term locus of control is used to describe the extent to which a


person believes she/he is the master of what happens to her/him
(Rotter 1966). Those who believe that they are in control are said to
have an internal locus of control, while those who believe that what
happens to them is the result of happenstance or the actions of others
are said to have an external locus of control. You do not have to believe
that you are the master of all things and all fate in order to have an
internal locus of control. A good indication of an internal locus of
control would be your taking responsibility for a poor performance
evaluation. Individuals with an extremely high internal locus of con-
trol also tend to accept responsibility for actions of others under their
control, such as subordinates. A good indication of an external locus
of control would be your regularly attributing poor performance to
reasons outside of yourself, such as interference from others or
unfairness of others.
If in Exercise 1 you consistently attributed the reasons for the
outcome to factors external to you, you might assess yourself with
an external locus of control. On the other hand, if you consistently
attributed the reasons to things in your control, you should assess
yourself with an internal locus of control.

SELF-MONITORING
You might think of self-monitoring as your chameleon factor.
However, do not conclude that it is necessarily a negative trait. Self-
monitoring is the term used to describe an individual’s ability to
adapt or change behavior based on circumstantial or situational fac-
tors (Snyder 1987).5 It is also possibly related to emotional intelli-
gence, which we discuss later in this chapter. People with a high
degree of self-monitoring adjust their behavior to suit the people,
circumstances, and situation; people with a low degree of self-
monitoring remain consistent in their demeanor, expressed atti-
tudes, and behavior despite any situational cues that may indicate
otherwise. If you are typically conscious of external cues and react
to them by modifying your expressions, behavior, or demeanor, you
5
See also Day, Schletcher, Unckless, and Hiller (2002). (Note that there is not yet a large
amount of research on self-monitoring.)

17
Personality

should probably assess yourself as a relatively high self-monitor.


If your behavior, expressions, and demeanor remain consistent
across very different situations and with very different individuals
and external circumstances, then you should probably assess your-
self as a very low self-monitor. If you pride yourself in consistent
behavior—always being true to yourself—you are likely to be
a low self-monitor.

COMPETITIVENESS AND TYPES A AND B


Do you eat rapidly? Do you walk rapidly? Do you often focus on
obstacles and become impatient with them? Do you try to do more
than one thing at a time? Do you place time pressure on yourself?
Are you obsessed with time? Do you readily know how long each
of your regular daily tasks takes? Do you find relaxation difficult?
Do you evaluate your performance and success in terms of quan-
tifiable things, such as earnings and personal possessions? Do you
like to discuss your accomplishments and acquisitions?
Are you able to relax without feeling guilty? Would it be correct
to say that you feel no need to wear a watch? Do you feel like there
is ample time to accomplish your goals? Do you rarely think in
terms of time expended? Do you rarely discuss your achievements?
One measure of personality is known as Type A and B
(Friedman and Rosenman 1974). If you answered “yes” to most of
the questions in the first paragraph of this subsection, then you are
likely a Type A personality. If you answered “no” to most of those
questions and are more aligned with the sentiments expressed in
the second paragraph, then you are likely a Type B personality.
Competitiveness is a characteristic most often associated with
Type A personalities. It is common for Type A individuals to have
a high level of competitiveness. However, individuals exhibit
Type A or B behaviors in varying degrees. Furthermore, some
individuals who possess Type A tendencies such as time urgency,
speed, and impatience do not necessarily focus on competing with
others. They sometimes are competing with themselves. Therefore,
HOT TIP! in addition to assessing whether you are more A or more B, you
Be sure to assess
should separately assess your level of competitiveness with oth-
whether you
compete more ers. A desire to win and the penchant for focusing on quantifiable
with yourself or material accomplishments are the strongest indicators of high
with others. competitiveness.

18
Personality

NEEDS FOR ACHIEVEMENT, POWER, AND AFFILIATION


David McClelland’s needs theory of motivation (McClelland 1961,
1975) also addresses aspects of personality relevant to our purpose
here. He and his associates investigated certain behavior relative to
the needs for achievement, power, and affiliation.6 Everyone has
some level of all three needs; however, it is the strength of each
need relative to the others that may affect behavior and negotiation
performance.
Those with a high need for achievement are driven to excel. They
also tend to seek responsibility—wanting credit for solutions, and
they seek feedback. High achievers are typically moderate risk takers.
While the need for power may be analyzed in two veins—
personal and social, our focus here is on the need for personal
power. Those with a high need for personal power seek power over
others. They seek to control or cause behavior in others. Social
power, on the other hand, is the power to enable others to excel and
the power to create a greater good.
Those with a high need for affiliation seek pleasant, friendly
interactions and relationships. They seek cooperation and mutual
understanding. They may tend to move away from competitive
interactions.
In assessing the relative strength of these needs, you may con-
sider what you would prefer others say about you after you depart
this life. Would you most like to be described in terms of your
material accomplishments? Would your greatest satisfaction come
from being described as a warm and caring person? Would you like
to be recognized for having helped others succeed?
In addition to thinking about how you feel you identify with
each of these needs, you may learn about the relative strength of
these needs in your personality by examining how you assess
others and how you explain the stories and motives of others. These
can be about real people you know, or they can be stories you
fabricate about strangers in magazines or photographs. Since we
project our own motives onto others, what you imagine and under-
stand about others will disclose something about you. Look for
themes in your stories about what is happening and what will hap-
pen. If you find frequent focus on friendship, affiliation, and love, it

6
See also Atkinson and Raynor (1974).

19
Personality

may be a reflection of your relatively high need for affiliation. If you


find frequent focus on control and influence over others, it may be
a reflection of your relatively high need for personal power. Finally,
if you find frequent focus on accomplishment and responsibility, it
may be a reflection of your relatively high need for achievement.

MACHIAVELLIANISM
Machiavellianism is named for Niccolo Machiavelli and seems to
be closely related to values and ethics.7 It is the name used to
measure the extent of one’s motivation for personal gain. It mea-
sures one’s willingness to place self-interest above all other inter-
ests. A person with a high level of Machiavellianism believes that
the end always justifies the means. Such a person approaches situa-
tions with a high level of competitiveness and wile. A high level of
Machiavellianism is related to manipulative and deceptive behav-
ior. Due to the nature of this trait, questionnaires to measure it are
apt to produce inaccurate results! You may look into yourself to
assess your level of this trait.

JUNGIAN PERSONALITY PREFERENCES


Our focus in this section is on the theories of personality that origi-
nated with Carl Jung. Although Jung’s work extends far beyond
what we use here, he analyzed four key dimensions of personality
that are particularly relevant to understanding human interaction
in general and negotiation in particular.
Jung (1968) analyzed four dimensions of personality: (1) our
personal source of energy, (2) our manner of taking in information,
(3) our style of processing information and/or making decisions,
and (4) our style of structuring or interacting with the outside world.
Jung coined a term to describe the two most opposite extremes of
each dimension. While each of us possesses aspects of both
extremes, according to Jung, we are born with a predisposition for
a preference as to each dimension. Those preferences derive from a
combination of genetics and early experience.
Most individuals retain a preference even while developing their
opposite capacities. The degree to which these predispositions
develop depends upon one’s environment, including the amount
and significance of your contact with people of the same or different

7
This concept of personality is based on Niccolo Machiavelli’s The Prince. See Christie and
Geis (1970).

20
Personality

preferences as well as the type of activities you undertake. These


preferences affect what we perceive, what we come to know, how
we learn and know, and how we approach negotiation.
The opposite of each preference is present in the unconscious
and can influence your behavior. Often such displays of nonprefer-
ence behaviors are viewed by others as aberrations. Most individu-
als do possess a preference, although individuals differ in the
relative strength of their preferences. Knowing your preferences is
necessary for improving your negotiation communication. Further-
more, when under distress or experiencing some loss of self-control,
you will unconsciously revert to your preferences.
Jung’s terms for the two preferences in each dimension are
(1) extroversion and introversion (E and I), (2) sensing and intuiting
(S and N), (3) thinking and feeling (T and F), and (4) perceiving and
judging (P and J). Jung’s work has been popularized by others. The
Myers-Briggs type indicator (MBTI) is widely recognized and is built
on Jung’s work.8 The following material is intended to provide a
general framework for your informal determination of preferences.

EXTROVERSION/INTROVERSION:
PERSONAL SOURCE OF ENERGY
Extroverts tend to verbalize much of what they observe and judge.
They are energized by people and action, and they become tired
when they spend too much time alone. They would rather talk than
listen, and they sometimes speak before they think. Extroverts pre-
fer to work in groups, like to test ideas on others, and like affirma-
tion from others. They often talk until the answer or solution comes
to them.
Jung’s (1968) original theory described a person’s energy source
as also related to the person’s view of the world. Accordingly,
extroverts take an external and objective view and introverts take
an internal and subjective view.
Introverts tend to keep their observations and judgments to them-
selves. They are energized by thoughts and ideas and can become
drained by prolonged, intense interaction with several people.
Introverts prefer listening over talking and often regret, after the

8
Another popular application that is built upon Jung’s work and the MBTI is Type Talk (Kroeger
and Theusen 1988). The MBTI is a psychological instrument available through individuals
trained and licensed to administer the test. It must be noted that, despite its widespread use,
there still lacks valid evidence for the MBTI. The categories and terms used here are substan-
tially consistent with both Jung and MBTI. It is also noted here that Jung preferred to spell the
word as extravert; however, the common preferred spelling is used through this book.

21
Personality

fact, not having spoken up. They think before they talk, often defer-
ring a response. Introverts get rejuvenated by time alone with their
thoughts and often feel a need to be alone after extended time with
several people. Introverts prefer to generate ideas or work through
problems alone. They are perceived as good listeners and often as
shy or reserved. Introverts also tend to be annoyed when someone
states the obvious or restates something that has already been said.
Descriptive words that should assist your self-assessment are
presented in the following lists. In combination with the foregoing
explanation, use the following words to determine whether you are
more or less an extrovert or an introvert. If a scale existed between the
two extremes, would you place yourself more toward the E or the I?

Extrovert (E) Introvert (I)


Sociability Territoriality
Interaction Concentration
External Internal
Breadth Depth
Extensive Intensive
Multiple relationships Limited relationships
External events Internal reactions
Gregarious Reflective
Speaks, then thinks Thinks, then speaks

COGNITIVE PROCESSING STYLE: HOW WE TAKE


IN AND PROCESS INFORMATION
Here we will look at the second and third dimensions of personality
according to Jung’s theory—sensing/intuiting and thinking/feel-
ing. Sensing and intuiting designate opposite styles of taking in
information. Thinking and feeling designate opposite styles of pro-
cessing information. The function of taking in information is nonra-
tional, while the function of processing that information is rational.

Sensing/Intuiting
Sensors tend to be quite literal in their observations about the world
as well as in their perceptions and data gathering. They are practical
and realistic and enjoy the tactile part of life. Sensors prefer tangible,
hands-on experiences. They like precision and sequential presenta-
tions. They know by reference to physical, external, and objective
sources. They feel certain about those things that come from the five
senses—taste, touch, sight, hearing, and smell. They prefer facts and

22
Personality

details to interpretation of meaning. They prefer specific questions


and specific answers. Sensors concentrate on the present and would
rather act than think. They get frustrated when instructions are not
clear or when details are left to later. They are more comfortable
learning subjects and skills that are conducive to precise rules or
formulas, such as mathematics, accounting, engineering, and other
objective knowledge, than they are with learning subjects such as
philosophy, human behavior, religion, and similar areas wherein
subjectivity, multiple approaches, and uncertainty more abound.
Intuitors can be figurative. As information is gained through the
five senses, intuitors take it in and look for meanings and relation-
ships. They know by reference to nonphysical, internal, and subjec-
tive sources. They prefer to look at the grand scheme of things. They
prefer a holistic approach, trying to organize information into theo-
retical frameworks. Intuitors like to find the underlying meaning
rather than accepting things at face value. They tend to think about
several things at once. They may be accused of being absent-
minded. They find details boring. Approximations and random-
ness do not bother the intuitor. That there may not be one correct
answer does not bother an intuitor.
The list of words that follows is provided as additional assis-
tance in identifying your preference on this dimension. Decide
whether you are closer to the S or the N.

Sensor (S) Intuitor (N)


Literal Interpretative
Present Future
Tangible Conceptual/theoretical
Perspiration (doing) Inspiration (thinking)
Concrete Abstract
Sequential Multiple
Fact Fantasy
Practicality Ingenuity
Specific General

Thinking/Feeling
Note that Jung’s terms here were not intended to describe one
preference for thinking and another for feeling. This preference
describes two types of rational processing. The names are not to
imply that thinking connotes intellect or logic and feeling connotes
emotions. Rather, the two distinguish the approach to and rela-
tive values used in decision making. Both are rational, intellectual
functions. Ideas create feelings. Feelings create ideas. The terms denote

23
Personality

two processes for the same function—processin information and


making decisions.
Thinkers prefer to be detached and analytical in making deci-
sions. They try to use objective criteria and guidelines. They strive for
clarity and what they believe is justice. They try not to get personally
involved in decisions. Thinkers are often called firm minded. They
stay cool and calm when others get upset. When thinkers see others
as wrong, thinkers may say so, regardless of the others’ feelings. It is
more important for thinkers to be right than to be liked. They are
sometimes viewed as cold or uncaring. Thinkers remember numbers
more easily than they remember faces and names.
Feelers use interpersonal involvement and subjective value and
criteria in making decisions. The impact and consequences of decisions
are important to feelers. They are often referred to as tenderhearted.
They try to identify with others and be empathetic. Feelers often
overextend themselves to meet the needs of other people. They do not
hesitate to apologize for or rescind something they said that hurt
another’s feelings. They are sometimes criticized for being fuzzy or
sindirect due to their concern for others’ feelings. They prefer harmony
over clarity and tend to put a great deal of love into their efforts. Feel-
ers take things personally. One may say that they lead with their heart.
The following lists may assist you in identifying your prefer-
ence on this dimension. Decide whether you identify more with the
T words or the F words.

Thinker (T) Feeler (F)


Objective Subjective
Firm minded Fair hearted
Rules Circumstances
Absolutism Persuasion
Just Humane
Clarity Harmony
Critical Empathetic
Policies Values
Detached Involved

ORIENTATION TO OTHERS
We have distinguished information-gathering preferences—
sensing and intuiting. We have distinguished decision-making
or information-processing preferences—thinking and feeling. We
have distinguished energy sources and preferences—extroverting

24
Personality

and introverting. This last of the four dimensions distinguishes


how one relates to the outer, or external, world both verbally and
behaviorally.

Perceiver/Judger
Perceivers prefer a flexible, spontaneous, adaptive, and responsive
environment. For them, sticking to decisions creates anxiety. They
prefer to wait and see what needs to be done. They are easily dis-
tracted. They love to explore. They are often accused of being dis-
organized. They believe that creativity is more important than order
and that if work is not fun it probably is not worth doing.
Judgers prefer a structured, scheduled, ordered, planned, and
controlled environment. They have a place for everything and
everything in its place. They are decisive and deliberate. They make
decisions with minimal stress. Judgers plan their work and follow
their plan. Their view is that there is a correct way and an incorrect
way of doing everything. They like to complete things. When some-
thing pops up to interfere with their plan, they experience annoy-
ance and anxiety. Judgers are always waiting for others who fail to
be on time. They believe that if everyone would simply do as they
are supposed to, life would be great. They are often accused of being
angry when they are merely stating their opinions—or frustrations.
The following lists will assist you in identifying this preference.

Perceiver (P) Judger (J)


Pending Firm
Indefinite Decided
Flexible Fixed
Adapt Control
Defer Complete
Respond Anticipate
Random Structured
Tentative Definite
Spontaneous Planned
What deadline? Meets deadline

LEARNING STYLE: WHAT YOU SEE AND HOW YOU KNOW


Learning may be defined as the process of acquiring a relatively
permanent change in understanding, attitude, knowledge, infor-
mation, ability, and/or skill (Wittrock 1977). There are many ways

25
Another Random Scribd Document
with Unrelated Content
"You surely must have been used to look at good paintings," said
Mr. Howard, "It is a taste that requires as much cultivation as any
other art. You evidently know how to look at a picture, and how to
appreciate its merit."
"I do not pretend to be a connoisseur, I assure you," said Emma.
"There is no occasion that you should—you have an eye and a
taste, which, lead your judgment right, and I can perceive that you
are well acquainted with the styles as well as the names of great
artists."
"I almost suspect you of quizzing me," replied Emma, blushing,
"have I been saying or affecting more than you think I felt."
"You are unjust to us both in such an idea," cried he, "I should not
take such a liberty; and you are in no danger of tempting me."
"My kind uncle was extremely fond of the art," said Emma, "and
he took me to every good collection and exhibition within our reach.
He likewise took great pains to form and correct my taste; so that I
ought rather to blush at knowing so little, than receive compliments
on the subject."
"I do not know of what uncle you are speaking," said Mr. Howard,
in a manner that denoted his interest in her connections; "you forget
that I know almost nothing of your family."
"The uncle who brought me up; Dr. Maitland."
"Then you were not educated at Winston?"
"I—oh no—my home was formerly in my uncle's house—I have
not been more than two months resident in my father's family."
"I dare say you think me a very stupid fellow for not being aware
of this—but though I saw you were different from your sisters, and
indeed most of the young ladies of the neighbourhood, the reason
never occurred to me."
"You thought, I suppose, I was a sort of Cinderella," said Emma
laughing, "let out by some benevolent fairy on the occasion of one
ball, and that having once escaped into public, I could not be
repressed again."
"You know I had not been in your father's house, and had
therefore no reason to assign you an imaginary abode in the kitchen,
in preference to the parlour, where I had never been. But I own I
was surprised by your sudden apparition, since I had neither in ball-
room or street, town or country, seen or heard of more than three
Miss Watsons."
"I can easily believe it—so protracted an absence will naturally
sink one's name in oblivion."
"May I ask if you are to return to your uncle's house?"
"Alas! no—my dear, kind uncle died not quite a twelvemonth ago—
my aunt has left England to settle in Ireland—and my home is now
at my father's."
"Is it not with rather a strange sensation that you meet your
nearest relations; they must be almost unknown to you."
"I have made acquaintance with one brother and two sisters,"
replied Emma with something like a sigh; "But I have yet to meet
another brother and sister."
"It seems almost a pity," said Mr. Howard thoughtfully, "to bring
up one child apart and differently from the other members of a
family, if they are ultimately to be rejoined. At least I feel in my own
case how much I should have lost, had Clara been separated from
me in childhood. I suppose it rarely happens that a brother and
sister are so much together as we were—but we were orphans, and
everything to each other till her marriage."
"It does not do, Mr. Howard, to indulge in retrospective
considerations, if they tend to make one dissatisfied," said Emma,
with an attempt to check a tear or hide it by a smile; "my friends
wished to do everything for the best, and if the result has been
different from their intentions, they are not to blame. But I do not
know that I should choose to repeat the experiment for one under
my care."
"Do you like the neighbourhood?" enquired he, feeling that he had
no right to press the last subject further.
"I have seen so little; the weather has been so unfavourable, but
it does not strike me as being very beautiful about Winston. I was
used to fine scenery in the west of England."
"Then you will naturally think Winston flat and uninteresting.—
Osborne Castle and its park have beauties, however, which you
cannot despise—but in my enquiry I rather referred to the
inhabitants—have you pleasant neighbours about your father's
house—I do not visit in the village."
"We live so very quietly," replied Emma, who had no intention of
satisfying his curiosity as to their acquaintance, "that I have had no
opportunity of judging. I saw a great many people at the ball, but as
you must have seen them too, you are as equal to decide on their
appearance as I am."
"You know Mr. Tom Musgrove of course?"
"A little."
"He is not a person of whom most young ladies answer so coolly;
if I put the same question to five out of six of my acquaintance, they
would reply with rapture—he is charming—divine—a perfect pattern
for all gentlemen."
"I understood he was a great favorite," observed Emma, still in
the same composed voice.
"I have been used to consider him such a perfect example in
everything relative to the important concerns of fashion and the
toilette," said Mr. Howard, gravely, "things which I know are of the
first importance in the eyes of ladies, that I have seriously proposed
when I wish to be particularly charming to copy him in the tying of
his cravat."
"I am not quite sure whether I should think any one improved by
copying Mr. Tom Musgrove, from his cravat to his shoe-buckles: but I
have, I am afraid, a wicked prejudice, against any individual who is
considered universally agreeable."
"Alas you discourage my young ambition; if to be universally
agreeable is to be hated by you, I shall leave forthwith my attempts
at pleasing. To how many individuals is it allowable to be friendly? to
how many cold? to how many repulsive in order to win your good
opinion."
"Impossible for me to answer without more data for my
calculations. You must tell me, to begin with, how many you have
been in the habit of flattering daily!"
"None, I assure you—there is not a more sincere creature under
the sun."
"I do not quite believe you—but if you will not own to that—with
how many do you consider yourself a particular favorite."
"That is an artful question—you wish to prove me guilty of general
agreeableness—but my native modesty stands my friend there: I do
not think more than two thirds of my acquaintance consider me a
very charming fellow—amongst ladies, I mean—of course, a man's
opinion goes for nothing."
"Ah, that is too many by half to please me—if you had always
spoken with sincerity, depend upon it your particular admirers would
be less numerous."
"But seriously, Miss Watson, why do you feel a particular enmity to
the general favorites of your sex!"
"Seriously then, because I mistrust them."
"You think then truth must be sacrificed to popularity? Is not that
rather a severe reflection on the taste of other women."
"I did not mean it as such."
"I never knew any one who did not profess to hate flattery."
"Very likely—but I go a step farther—I dislike the flatterer."
"And by what scale do you measure, so as to form a correct
decision—is your standard of your own merit so accurately settled,
that you can instantly perceive truth from flattery, appropriating just
so much of a compliment as you deserve, and rejecting the rest."
"I think, Mr. Howard, I am more inclined to decide on the value of
compliments from the character of the giver, than from my own. If
an individual either man or woman dares to say a disagreeable truth,
I cannot suspect them of an agreeable falsehood. Or if they are as
ready to praise the absent, as to compliment the present, then I
listen with more complaisance."
"It is fortunate for some men that all young ladies are not like
you; their stock of conversation would be reduced very low, if
neither praises of the present nor abuse of the absent were
tolerated."
"I differ from you, Mr. Howard. If no one would listen to slander
much less evil would happen in the world; much unhappiness would
be saved—much moral guilt would be avoided."
"True: call it by its right name—slander—and every one shrinks
from it; the habit of softening down our expressions leads to much
evil—a little scandal, nobody minds that."
"Most detestable of all is the flattery from mercenary motives. To
see a man—a young man courting, flattering, cajoling a woman for
her money—one to whom he would, were she poor, hardly deign to
address a word—selling himself body and soul for gold—oh, it makes
one shudder—it tempts me to unjust, harsh thoughts of the whole
species. Hateful!"
Mr. Howard looked at his companion with considerable surprise.
She certainly was using rather strong expressions, and evidently felt
acutely what she was saying. As he, however, was perfectly ignorant
of the circumstances of her aunt's marriage, and never for a
moment thought of anything of the sort, an idea passed through his
mind that she might allude to himself and Lady Osborne, for though
he could not plead guilty to anything on his own part which
deserved such condemnation, it was possible his conduct might
appear in this light to her eyes. He did not stop to consider whether
it was probable, or in accordance with her character to make such
personal reflections, but fell into a reverie on the subject of his own
manners, from which he was roused by her addressing him again.
"I am quite ashamed, Mr. Howard, of having spoken so bitterly
just now—pray forget what I said if possible—at least do not decide
on my being a very ill-natured person because I spoke harshly—
there are sometimes circumstances on which to reflect invariably
creates unpleasant sensations—but the past is passed, and should
not be allowed to awaken angry feelings."
"I fancy we have strayed a long way from the point which
awakened these reflections," said Mr. Howard trying to recover
himself likewise. "Tom Musgrove was the commencement of our
dissertation on flattery."
"Mr. Musgrove—yes, so he was, but I had indeed forgotten it; my
thoughts were many miles off—they had gone back many months."
"Your opinion of him does not seem very high," observed he,
much relieved at the termination of her sentence.
"My opinion of him is of too little consequence to be worth
discussing," replied Emma: "I have not seen a great deal of him, but
I fancy my father does not estimate him very highly."
"But you cannot deny him the advantage of having plenty to say
for himself."
"Plenty indeed—sufficient to make any discussion amongst others
on that subject unnecessary."
"He is handsome too, in the opinion of most women."
"I do not deny it."
"And you know he has a very comfortable independence."
"On that point, Mr. Howard, I feel incredulous: independence is
the very thing he wants. His principal object seems to be to follow
another."
"I see you are hardened against him."
"You think me prejudiced, no doubt."
"I have no wish to combat your prejudice, or persuade you into
liking him against your will."
A pause ensued, when Emma suddenly starting from her reverie,
exclaimed,
"It is almost dusk—we must really return home."
"True, we can come again another day; I am sure you may come
whenever you feel disposed—I shall be most happy to escort you."
At this moment the door was thrown back, and Lord Osborne
himself appeared. After paying his compliments, he paused a
moment, and then observed,
"You must have a precious strong taste for pictures, Miss Watson,
to like to remain in the gallery even when it is too dark to see. I
suppose breathing the same air is pleasant to those who value the
art."
"We have stayed longer than we intended, my lord," said Emma;
"and I really feel much obliged to your sister for allowing me such a
pleasure; but we expected her to join us."
"It's a mighty fine thing to have such a lot of fine pictures, with all
the fine names tacked on to them. One or two I really like myself—
there's one of some horses, by somebody, excellent—and a Dutch
painting of dead game, which is so like you would really think them
all alive. Did you notice it?"
"Not particularly—I do not care much for still life."
"Howard there knows all about them: he has the names and dates
and all on the tip of his tongue. Don't you find it a deuced bore to
listen to it?"
"On the contrary, I am much obliged to Mr. Howard for the
information."
"Well I should be glad, for my part, of a piece of information: how
the—I beg pardon—I mean how the wonder did I contrive to miss
you as I was going down the straight path to the Parsonage."
"Because we did not come up the straight path, my lord."
"Well, on my honour, I just was surprised when I got there to hear
you were gone—stole away in fact. 'Holloa! how can that be!' said I,
'I did not meet them—no indeed.' 'Did you not!' cried Mrs. Willis.
'Well deuce take it, that is extraordinary!'"
"Did she say so indeed," said Emma with exemplary gravity.
"I don't mean to say she used those very words—she thought
them, though, I'm sure, by her look."
"But now, my lord, we must wish you good evening, or Mrs. Willis
will be waiting for dinner; and though I am not afraid of her
swearing at us, I do not wish to annoy her."
"Ah, yes, Mrs. Willis is mistress—I know—the Parson there, like
myself, is under petticoat government; nothing like a mother or
sister to keep one in order. I'll be bound a wife is nothing to it. One
cannot get away from a sister, and one can't make her quiet and
obedient—you see she has never undertaken anything of the kind,
as I understand wives do when one marries them."
"But I have heard, my lord, that they sometimes break their word
and rebel," said Emma with mock solemnity.
"Ah, but that must be the husband's fault, he gives them too
much rein—keep a strict hand on them, that's my maxim."
"I recommend you, however, to keep it a secret, if you wish to find
a wife; I assure you no woman would marry you if she knew your
opinion."
"Seriously—well but I am sorry I said so then."
"Oh, never mind—there is no harm done as yet—I promise not to
betray you—but here we are at Miss Osborne's room, will she expect
us to look in—or shall we go straight home, Mr. Howard?"
"We'll see if Rosa's here," said her brother, opening the door as he
spoke. The room, however, was empty, and there was nothing to be
done but return home. Emma was vexed to find the young peer
persisted in escorting them. Though his conversation had been much
shorter than Mr. Howard's, she was far more weary of it. To hurry
her walk, was her only remedy, and the coldness of the air was a
plausible excuse for this. The space which had occupied nearly half
an hour in ascending, was now traversed in five minutes, and
breathless but glowing, the party reached the door of the
parsonage. Here Lord Osborne was really obliged to leave them, and
Emma hastened to her room to prepare for dinner.
"Well, Emma," cried Elizabeth, "I should like to know what you
have been doing all this time—what an age you have been gone!"
"Looking at pictures, Elizabeth—you know what I went for."
"I know what you went for indeed, but how do I know what you
stayed for. Pictures indeed—looking at pictures for two hours and a
half—and in the dark too!"
Emma laughed.
"Of what do you suspect me, Elizabeth?" cried she as her sister
placed a candle so as to throw the light on her face.
"Which have you been flirting with?" said Elizabeth taking her
sister's hand, and closely examining her countenance. "The peer or
the parson, which of your two admirers do you prefer?"
"How can you ask such an unnecessary question?" returned
Emma, blushing and laughing, yet struggling to disengage herself,
"would you hesitate yourself—is not Lord Osborne the most
captivating, elegant, lively, fascinating young nobleman who ever
made rank gracious and desirable. Would you not certainly accept
him?"
"Why yes, I think I should—it would be something to be Lady
Osborne—mistress of all those rooms and servants, carriages and
horses. I think I should like it, but then I shall never have the
choice!"
"So far as I am concerned, I do not think I shall interfere with
your power of accepting him—if he makes you an offer, do not
refuse it on my account."
"Very well—and when I am Lady Osborne, I will be very kind to
Mrs. Howard—I will send and ask her to dine with me most Sundays,
and some week days too."
"I hope she will like it."
"I will give her a new gown at Easter, and a pelisse or bonnet at
Christmas!"
"Your liberality is most exemplary, but in the midst of your kind
intentions to Mrs. Howard, I fear you are forgetting Mrs. Willis and
her dinner. If you do not finish your dressing quickly you will keep
them waiting."
Elizabeth took her sister's advice, and finished her toilette with all
possible despatch. It was singular that though invariably consuming
double the time that sufficed for Emma, the result of her efforts in
adjusting her clothes was much less satisfactory. She never looked
finished. Her hair was certain to fall down too low; or her gown
burst open, or her petticoat peeped out from underneath: she was
always finding a string, or a button, or a loop wanting, just when
such a loss was particularly inconvenient—always in a hurry, always
behind hand, always good-naturedly sorry, but always as far from
amendment.
The evening was spent in quiet comfort, far removed from the
stately grandeur of the yester-night's scene—they closed round the
fire, chatting and laughing, cracking nuts and eating home-baked
cakes with a zest which Osborne Castle and its lordly halls could not
rival. They talked of the snow melting, and Charles and his uncle too
persisted in the greatest incredulity on that subject. A hundred other
things were discussed, made charming by the ease and good-
humour with which they were canvassed, and then a book was
produced. Shakespeare was placed in Mr. Howard's hands, and he
read with a degree of feeling and taste, which made it very
delightful to his listeners. Thus the evening passed peacefully and
quickly, and when they separated for the night, it was with
encreased good will and affection between the parties.
CHAPTER XI.

The next morning, though ushered in by no change of the


weather, brought a very material alteration to the Miss Watsons.
About eleven o'clock, as the ladies were working together, their
attention was attracted by the sound of carriage wheels on the drive
to the house. Presently a note was handed to Miss Watson,
accompanied by an assurance that the carriage was waiting. With
much surprise, Elizabeth opened the dispatch. It was from her
father, and contained information to the effect, that wearied by their
long absence, and finding that the lanes were still blocked up, he
had sent their man to the post town for a chaise, in which they could
return home, by taking the high road, which, although greatly
adding to the distance, was the safest and most expeditious route
they could adopt. He begged them to return immediately in the
post-chaise, and Robert could follow with their own little vehicle
after them. Kind as the family had been to them, the girls were still
glad of a prospect of returning home before Sunday, being conscious
that they could be ill spared from their father's house, and that
every hour of enjoyment to them, was probably unpleasant and
wearisome to him.
They could not be parted with, of course, without great regret and
many remonstrances on the subject of the dangerous nature of the
expedition they were undertaking. Charles, in particular, gave them
such repeated assurances that they would certainly be upset, that
Emma declared her belief that his foreknowledge arose from having
bribed the postilion to bring on a catastrophe. Mrs. Willis' object
seemed to be to overwhelm them with cloaks, furs, shawls, and
everything she could think of to fence the cold away, and Mr.
Howard obviated all difficulty about returning these articles, by
volunteering to drive over as soon as the weather permitted, and
fetch them all back. Hopes of a continued friendship closed the visit,
and they parted on the best possible terms.
Their return home was perfectly uneventful. There was not even
the cold to complain of—so well had Mrs. Willis succeeded in
wrapping them up.
Most cordial was the welcome they received from Mr. Watson; and
Margaret, too, really looked enlivened by the sight of them.
"I shall not let you young ladies go visiting again in a hurry," said
he good-humouredly, "I began to think one of you must have eloped
with Lord Osborne, and the other with Mr. Howard. I assure you, we
have been very dull without you."
Such was his salutation—Margaret's ran as follows:
"Well, I hope you have been having pleasure enough—and that
you will have brought home some news to enliven us. I am sure I
am almost dead of stupidity and dulness. Not a creature have we
seen—not an individual has come near us. Some people contrive to
keep all the amusement—all the luck—everything that is good and
pleasant to themselves."
The astonishment of Margaret, when she heard the detail of what
had occurred, was excessive; she was ready to cry with vexation and
envy, to think of her sisters having so much to amuse them—of
which she did not partake. With jealous anger she insisted on
knowing every particular, for the sake, apparently, of tormenting
herself to the uttermost, and being as miserable and ill-used as
possible.
Every dish at dinner—every jewel in Lady Osborne's necklace—
every word said to be spoken by the ladies at the castle, and every
amusement suggested by the inhabitants of the parsonage, was an
additional sting to her mind; and she was more than ever convinced
that it was an act of the most barbarous injustice, the not allowing
her to accompany her sisters—though nothing could be more
evident than the total impossibility of such an arrangement. In vain
did Emma try to turn the conversation to some less irritating topic;
Margaret pertinaciously returned to the original theme, and insisted
on learning every thing which her sisters could tell her.
There are various tastes amongst the inhabitants of the world;
some delight in making themselves happy, some in just the reverse;
Margaret's pleasure was to fret; her pastime was to vex herself. Had
she been the only victim to this peculiar taste, there would have
been less harm in it; but, unfortunately, her father and sisters were
likewise sufferers, and in as much as they were involuntary
sufferers, and really took no pleasure in her vexation, it was rather
hard upon them to be involved in the same calamity.
In progress of time the snow melted from the ground, and the
inhabitants of the rectory at Winston were again set free from
confinement. As soon as the roads became at all passable, Emma
began to catch herself wondering when Mr. Howard would redeem
his promise of coming to fetch the articles with which his sister had
supplied them. She likewise detected herself in what she considered
another failing; this was looking round the untidy rooms of her
father's home, with their dingy carpets, faded curtains, papers soiled
by the hands of the servants and children, and tables unpolished
and scratched, and contrasting them mentally with the clear and
cheerful aspect of the apartments where Mrs. Willis was mistress.
The grandeur of Osborne Castle had none of the charms in her eyes
which Mrs. Willis' little parlour presented, and she came to the
conclusion that the happiest thing in the world must be to preside
over such an establishment with such a companion. Those feelings,
however, she did not openly express, in which she differed from
Elizabeth, who repeatedly declared that she wished she could make
their house resemble Mr. Howard's.
One morning, shortly after their return home, Tom Musgrove,
whom they had not seen since that event, was ushered into the
parlour.
Margaret, who happened to be alone, was instantly all agitation
and bustle, trying to persuade him to take her chair by the fire, as
she was sure he must be cold, or to accept the loan of her father's
slippers whilst his boots were sent to the kitchen to dry.
He persisted, however, in declining her tender attentions,
declaring she wanted to make an old man of him before his time,
and placing himself on the hearth-rug, with his back to the fire, and
his hands behind him, half whistled an air.
Margaret sighed.
"It is long since we have seen you," said she; "and the time has
passed very wearily."
"Hum," said Tom, stopping in his tune. "Where are your sisters,
Miss Margaret?"
"Oh, they are at home again," replied Margaret. "I believe Emma
is with my father, and Elizabeth in the kitchen. Did you hear of their
being away so long?"
"How long?" cried Tom.
"From Wednesday to Saturday: there was I left without a creature
to speak to except my father and the servants, snowed up in the
house, and if they had only taken me with them, I should have
enjoyed it as much as they did."
"I dare say; but how came they to go?" said Tom, who though
really knowing nothing about it, was determined to learn all he could
without betraying his ignorance.
"Oh, they wanted to return Mrs. Willis' visit, and they went over in
the pony-chaise, and then the snow came on and stopped them
there all that time. I dare say they liked to stay, for I have no doubt
but they might have come home had they tried. At last my father
was obliged to send for a post-chaise to fetch them home in, and
they came on Saturday."
"And they liked it very much, did they?"
"Oh yes, of course—was it not hard I could not go too? I am
always thwarted and ill-used."
"I wish your sister Emma would come down; she is always shut up
in your father's room; I called here on purpose to see her."
"I dare say she will come presently—do sit down here; I am sure
you ought to rest yourself; you seem to have had a very dirty ride."
"You could not go and call her, I suppose?"
"Oh no, she will come when she has done reading to my father.
Do take something—a biscuit and a glass of wine, or something of
that kind."
"Quite unnecessary, I have but just breakfasted. I do not keep
such gothic hours as some of my friends do. I am able to please
myself—a free and independent man."
"No doubt a happy one. Ah, Mr. Musgrove, you are most
fortunate. You cannot tell the misery, the low spirits, the—the—in
short all we poor helpless women suffer from, how much heart-
breaking sorrow we endure in silence—bitterness of heart of which
the world knows nothing."
Tom only whistled again in reply to this very pathetic address,
then turning round began to examine the ornaments on the
chimney-piece. Even Margaret could not quite blind herself to the
change in his manner since the period when her smiles seemed the
object he most coveted.
Presently he began again.
"Whilst your sisters were at Howard's did they see much of the
Osbornes?"
Before Margaret had time to give an account of the visit to the
Castle, Elizabeth entered the room.
"So I understand, Miss Watson, you have been playing the truant,
and been obliged to be brought back almost by force."
"And are you come to congratulate or condole with me on our
return?"
"I am come to wish you joy about being overwhelmed in the
snow. I little thought when I was last at Osborne Castle we were
such near neighbours."
"When were you there?" cried Elizabeth.
"Let me see—I think it was Thursday. I am there very often, but I
think Thursday was the last day. How droll it would have been had
we met."
"Emma," cried Miss Watson, as her youngest sister just then
entered the room, "Mr. Musgrove says he was at the Castle on
Thursday."
"Oh," said Emma.
"I wonder we did not hear of it," pursued Elizabeth. "Miss Osborne
never mentioned it."
"How do you like Miss Osborne," enquired Tom, who wanted to
appear perfectly well informed as to what had passed, and was,
therefore, ashamed of asking questions which might betray his real
ignorance.
"She seems a very pleasant, amiable young lady," replied
Elizabeth, "don't you think so, Emma."
"Yes," replied she, quietly.
"Did she know you were friends of mine, Miss Watson? Miss
Emma, did she not talk about me?"
"No, indeed," replied Emma, with much satisfaction; "we never
heard your name mentioned the whole time we were in company
with her."
"How did you hear we had been there," enquired Elizabeth.
"I think Osborne mentioned it on Saturday, when I saw him for a
minute," then seating himself by Emma, who was a little apart from
the others, he whispered; "He told me the beautiful, but obdurate
Miss Watson had been at Howard's parsonage. Why do you treat him
with such scorn, Miss Emma? You will drive my poor friend to
despair."
"I should be sorry to think that I merited your accusation, Mr.
Musgrove: scorn cannot be a becoming quality in a young lady."
"Nay, there can be nothing unbecoming which you can do; youth
and beauty have unlimited privileges," whispered he again. "Miss
Osborne vows you eclipse Miss Carr in beauty, and she would rather
have you for a friend. She is dying to be introduced to you."
"It is quite unnecessary to inflict such a death upon her even in
imagination, Mr. Musgrove—for our acquaintance has progressed too
far for that phrase to be at all applicable to it."
"Yes now, I dare say; Osborne told me, but I forget, you went
over the castle I think."
"No, we did not."
"You did not! that was unlucky; I wish I had known you were
going, I would have been there, and I could have suggested it to
Miss Osborne; I dare say she would have shewn you all the rooms."
"She offered to do so, but we put it off till another time; we
thought we should be too hurried."
"It's a pity you did not dine there; its something quite grand to
see all the plate—I quite enjoy it—they give such good dinners."
"You do not seem aware that we did dine there," replied Emma,
"and, as I had seen other large establishments before, I saw nothing
so very astonishing at their table."
"You did dine there—yes—but that was in a family way; the thing
is to see a regular great dinner—twenty people sitting down—that is
what I like."
"I am not fond of large dinner parties; unless one has a very
pleasant neighbour they are apt to be dull."
"Very much so—very much so indeed; I quite agree with you, a
little, quiet, social dinner—where one person can talk and the others
listen, that is pleasant. You get every thing hot and quickly—that's
the thing!"
Emma did not feel called on to answer, and presently he added:
"I should like to have you for a neighbour at such a dinner."
Emma was still obdurately silent, and Mr. Musgrove, to
recompense himself, turned to Elizabeth, and began to talk to her.
As soon as her attention was released Emma left the room, and
throwing on a bonnet and cloak, determined to take refuge in the
garden as the day was fine, and she longed for fresh air. Hardly had
she quitted the entrance, however, when her attention was attracted
by the sound of wheels in the lane, and looking up her cheek
crimsoned with pleasure at perceiving Mr. Howard.
The pleasure was certainly mutual, judging from the alacrity with
which he sprang from the carriage to meet and address her. There
was no mistaking the look and air with which he advanced, it was
the genuine expression of a cordial welcome, met with equal though
more bashful cordiality on her side.
He was come, of course, to redeem his promise of fetching back
his sister's property; she would have come also, but she had a cold
which confined her to the house. But he had another object in his
visit—he was the bearer of an invitation to herself and sisters to
attend a concert at the Castle, which was to take place in the
afternoon, and to be followed by a ball in the evening. Miss Osborne
hoped they would excuse her mother's not having called on them;
she scarcely ever paid visits, never in the winter, or she would have
accompanied her daughter to the Vicarage when they were there.
Emma read the note which was addressed to herself, and felt very
much pleased. It contained, besides the invitation to the ball for
herself and sisters, a most pressing request that she would pay a
lengthened visit at the Castle; over this she pondered long, and then
ended with coming to no conclusion, suddenly remembering that she
was detaining Mr. Howard out of doors, when she ought to have
allowed him to enter the house.
"You will find Mr. Tom Musgrove sitting with my sisters," continued
she; "but if you will be so kind as not to mention the contents of the
note before him, you would greatly oblige me."
"Could I not see Mr. Watson?" replied Mr. Howard; "I wish to call
on him, and perhaps when my visit to him is over your sisters will be
disengaged."
"Certainly; I am sure my father would have great pleasure in
seeing you," said Emma much gratified; "allow me to show you the
way."
She ushered him accordingly to her father's dressing-room, and
having witnessed the very cordial reception which Mr. Watson
offered him, she was about to withdraw, but her father stopped her.
"I am sure you can have nothing particular to do, Emma, so you
may just as well stay and talk to Mr. Howard—I like very much to
hear you, but you know I am not strong enough to converse myself."
"I am sure, my dear father, nobody talks half so well when you are
equal to it, but indeed you must not fancy yourself unwell, or you
will frighten Mr. Howard away."
"When Mr. Howard has reached my age, my dear, and felt half the
pain that I do, from gout and dyspepsia, he will be very glad to set
his daughter to talk for him, my dear; so I beg you will stay."
"I wish I enjoyed the prospect of realizing your picture, my dear
sir; a daughter exactly like Miss Emma Watson would be indeed a
treasure."
"But remember it is to be purchased at the expense of gout, and
you must not look for it these thirty years, Mr. Howard," said Emma
laughing. "When the sacrifice is complete you will talk in a very
different strain."
Mr. Howard looked very incredulous, but said nothing more on that
subject.
Emma then mentioned the note she had received; her father
began to murmur.
"The Osbornes will all turn all your heads with their balls and their
visits, child," said he pettishly. "I wish you had never known them."
Emma looked down.
"I am sure I do not wish to go, if you dislike it," said she, in a
voice which rather trembled.
It was evident to Mr. Howard that she did wish it very much.
Mr. Watson began again.
"What am I to do if you are going away for two or three days? You
are but just come home as it is—I cannot do without you."
"Then I, at all events, can stay with you," replied Emma cheerfully,
"and my sisters can do as they please."
Annoyed at the gentleman's selfishness, Mr. Howard felt inclined
to interpose, but doubted whether he should not do more harm than
good.
Emma knew better, or acted more wisely in not contradicting him,
for like many irritable people, the moment he found himself
unopposed, he began to relent, and said in a more placid voice,
"What's the invitation, read it again, Emma, I am not quite clear
about it."
Emma complied.
"Well, I do not know; she does not want you all to stay over the
ball—and as Elizabeth will be at home, perhaps I could spare you for
a day or two."
"Elizabeth would like to go to the ball too, papa."
"Yes, yes, but then she and Margaret would come home at night,
and I should not be all day alone. I think you might go—you must
have a post-chaise and a pair of horses to take you, I suppose, and
bring your sisters back again. Would you like it, my dear?"
"Very much, sir, if it does not disturb you."
Like it indeed—the words served but coldly to express the
pleasure with which her heart beat at the idea. It was so very kind
of Miss Osborne to think of her in that way, and it was so very
pleasant to see how much consequence Mr. Howard attached to her
acceptance of the offer. She had not dared to look quite at him; but
the first glance she had ventured on, showed in his face an
expression of deep interest, not to be mistaken, and now looking up,
she met his eyes fixed on her with a look which immediately sunk
hers again to the ground, and seemed to call all the blood from her
heart to her cheeks.
"I am sure," cried he, speaking hurriedly to relieve her
embarrassment, "Miss Osborne would have been exceedingly
disappointed had you settled otherwise. I can venture to assert, sir,
that Miss Osborne is very fond of your daughter, and extremely
anxious to cultivate her acquaintance."
"I dare say, I dare say, why should she not; but I hope Emma
does not flatter her to win her good will."
"I hope not, sir," said Emma, "I should despise myself if I did."
"It is impossible that it should be necessary," cried Mr. Howard.
"Miss Osborne is not to be propitiated by flattery, and it would
require, on Miss Emma's part, nothing beyond her natural manners
to produce a wish to carry on the acquaintance."
"I suppose Miss Osborne desired you to make civil speeches for
her," said Mr. Watson, laughing.
"No, I do it of my own free will, my dear sir."
Mr. Howard's visit was long and lively; Mr. Watson was evidently
cheered by it, and pressed him to renew it.
"I am afraid I ask what is not agreeable," continued he; "I dare
say I am dull and unpleasant; but if you knew what a treat it is to
me to see cheerful faces, you would not wonder at my selfish wish.
You, Mr. Howard, and Emma do me good."
There was something very pleasant to Emma's ears in hearing her
name thus connected with Mr. Howard's; and it was not unwelcome
to the young man either, who warmly pressed her father's hand, and
promised readily to come as often as he could.
"And mind, Emma, when he does come, you bring him to me,"
said her father; "it is not every young man that I care to see. Your
Tom Musgroves, and such young dandies, are not at all to my mind;
but a young man who listens to what his elders say, and does not
flout and jeer at them, but shows a proper respect to age and
experience, that's what I like. I shall be happy to see you, Mr.
Howard, whenever you can come."
After renewing his promise to be a regular and frequent visitor, Mr.
Howard was conducted by Emma to the parlour, from whence they
found Tom Musgrove had departed. Her two sisters looked up as if
surprised to see Emma and her companion; but their pleasure much
exceeded their surprise, when they learnt the nature of the embassy
with which he was charged. Margaret especially, who had formed
most exalted ideas of the nature and felicity of a visit to the castle,
was at first in a perfect rapture. She was certain that the whole
affair would be in the most superlative style of excellence; that Miss
Osborne must be a lady of first rate taste and talent; that the
company would be select in an extraordinary degree, and in short
that she should never have known what grandeur, beauty, elegance,
and taste meant, but for Lady Osborne's invitation to the concert
and ball. She determined to do her best to make her court to the
whole family of Osbornes, and had great hopes of becoming an
especial favorite with them all. It was not till after Mr. Howard's
departure, which took place after a visit of about ten minutes, that a
cloud came over her bright vision. She then learnt the sad fact that
Emma was invited to remain at the castle, but that she herself was
to return home.
This discovery made her very angry; she could comprehend no
reason for such a marked preference; why should Miss Osborne
invite Emma who was the youngest, and exclude herself; it really
surpassed her comprehension; it was most extraordinary; she had a
great mind not to go at all; she would let Miss Osborne see that she
was not to be treated with neglect; she was not a person to come
and go at any one's bidding; if Miss Osborne could ask Emma, why
not herself too; she surely had as much claim to attention. Then she
turned to Emma and required her to promise that she would not
accept the invitation. But Emma said she had done so already. She
had written a note which Mr. Howard had charge of; and she was
not to be induced to retract. Margaret grew quite angry, accusing
her of being mean-spirited and servile, fawning on Miss Osborne,
and winning her favor only by her base concessions; she said
everything which an irritated and jealous temper could suggest, and
tormented Emma into tears at her crossness and ill-will.
"I wonder you mind her, Emma," remonstrated Elizabeth, when
she discovered that her sister's eyes were red, and wrung from her
an acknowledgment of the cause. Elizabeth had not been present
when the discussion which pained Emma so much, had taken place.
"It's not the least use fretting about Margaret's ill-temper and
teazing ways—she always was a plague and a torment from a child,
and there's no chance of her being any better. She is so abominably
selfish. But I cannot bear her to make you cry."
"I dare say you think me very foolish," replied Emma, wiping her
eyes, "but I have never been used to be crossly spoken to, and it
quite upsets me."
"No, I don't think you foolish, Emma; you are only much too good
and tender for this situation. I shall be glad when you are married
and safe with Mr. Howard, and nobody to scold you or make you
spoil your beauty by crying."
"Nonsense, Elizabeth."
"It's not nonsense, Emma, I believe he is very good-natured, and I
dare say you will be very happy with him. How long were you tête-à-
tête, with him, before you brought him into the parlour?"
"We came from my father's room then."
"Oh, you need not apologise; I think you were quite right to have
a comfortable chat with him, before bringing him into Margaret's
company. It is but little conversation you can have when she is by. I
saw you with him in the garden."
Emma blushed.
"I assure you we did not stay there five minutes; he came to call
on my father, and we went to him immediately."
Elizabeth only answered by a look; but it was a look which shewed
that she was not in the least convinced by Emma's assertions, but
only wondered that she should think them necessary.

END OF VOL. I.
THE YOUNGER SISTER, VOL II.
CHAPTER I.

The invitation to the important party was not for an early date;
ten days must elapse before the arrival of the day expected to bring
so much happiness with it. The comfort of the Watson family
suffered alternations which could only be compared to the ebbing
and flowing of the tide, but that their recurrence could not be
calculated on with equal certainty. When the pleasure she was to
enjoy occupied her mind, Margaret was comparatively happy; the
arrangement of her dress, the minor difficulties about ornaments
and shoes, were even then sufficient to destroy her equanimity, and
detract from her peace of mind; but this was nothing to the state of
acidity and fermentation which her temper presented, when the
grand insult of not being Miss Osborne's friend, and not invited to
stay at the Castle, recurred in vivid colors to her memory.
But three days before the important morning, a very unexpected
event threw the whole family into a ferment. Just as the two elder
sisters were setting off to the town, to see if their new bonnets were
making the progress which was desirable, the sudden appearance of
a post-chaise startled them. Emma, who was in her father's room as
usual, heard the wheels on the gravel, and naturally supposing that
it was the old pony-chaise leaving the door, was perfectly astonished
the next minute by the startling uproar which resounded through the
hall. Loud laughter, and a mingled clatter of tongues, which might
almost be denominated screaming, convinced her that whatever was
the origin, it was not of a tragic nature, but her awakened curiosity
made her long to know the cause, through she feared to move, as
her father had fallen into a gentle doze. A shriller exclamation than
before suddenly roused him from his slumber, and starting up he
exclaimed:
"What are those confounded women about? Emma, go and bid
them all be quiet."
Emma escaped from the room to obey his behest, and on reaching
the turn of the stairs paused a moment to see who was there; just
then she caught her own name.
"Emma is at home," said Margaret, "and as I really want to go, I
shall not mind you. Pen, you can go and sit with her."
"Very well, it's all the same to me," replied a stranger, who she
inferred was her unknown sister, "I am sure I don't want to keep you
at home." And as she spoke she turned again to the door, "I say
driver, you just get that trunk lifted in, there's a good fellow, and see
you don't turn it bottom upwards, my man, or I vow I won't give you
a sixpence—do you hear?"
The driver grinned and proceeded to pull down the trunk, whilst
Penelope Watson stood at his elbow, and flourished an umbrella in
her hand, very much as if she meant to enforce her threats with
blows.
When satisfied, however, with the care which he took of her
property, she had paid and dismissed him, she turned to her sisters,
exclaiming:
"There, now you may bundle off too, as fast as you please, my
bonnet and gown and all are in that trunk, and you shall not see
them till I put them on, lest you should try and copy them."
"How very ill-natured," cried Margaret.
"No, it isn't, what becomes me would never suit you, so I only
prevent you making a fright of yourself. Where's Emma? I want to
see her."
"Here I am," said she timidly advancing, for Penelope's loud voice
quite overpowered her courage.
"Here I am," mimicked Penelope, advancing towards her, "and
how does your little ladyship do, pray? Why are you so long coming
to welcome your new sister? I am sure you ought to have learnt
more affection from Margaret."
Emma did not know what to answer to this attack, but looked at
Elizabeth rather distressed.
"Never mind, Penelope," replied Miss Watson to her look, "she
always says what she pleases; well, Margaret is waiting in the
chaise, so I must go; Emma, will you take Pen to my father?"
And Elizabeth hastened away as she spoke.
Penelope turned to her remaining sister, and surveyed her from
head to foot—
"Well," said she, "I suppose I had better go and report myself
first, and then I can settle about my things; upon my word, Emma,
you are very pretty, I am so glad you have dark hair and eyes;
Margaret makes me quite sick of fair skins, by her nonsense about
her own. Here I am, sir," cried she, advancing into her father's room
as she spoke, "come to waken you all up; I am sure the old house
looks as if it had gone to sleep since I went away, and there is the
same fly on the window, I protest, as when I was last in the room.
How do you do, my dear sir?"
"None the better for all the confounded clatter you have been
making in the hall, I can tell you; I thought you had brought home a
dozen children at your heels, judging from the uproar you created.
What mad freak has possessed you now, Penelope?"
"Oh! I came for two things—one was to go to the Osborne Castle
ball—the other I'll tell you by-and-bye."
"You are always racing over the country, and bent on having your
own way, I know."
"So is every one; but they don't all know how to get it, so well as I
do; but I see I'm disturbing you, so I shall go and unpack my rattle-
traps—Emma come with me."
Emma seemed to obey instinctively—but she felt no pleasure in
accompanying her sister. Her voice, look and manner, were alike
uninviting, and she felt inclined to shrink from her. Penelope went to
the parlour, and stirring the fire, drew in a chair close to the chimney
—placed her feet upon the fender, and then turning abruptly round
to her sister, said—
"So it is all your doing, is it, our going to the castle balls; it is
really something new—Margaret wrote me word you and Miss
Osborne were bosom friends?"
Emma coloured, but did not know what to say in reply.
"How sheepish you look, Emma," cried her sister, "one would think
you were ashamed of it all; I am sure I think it vastly clever of you
to get up a friendship with Miss Osborne, or a flirtation with her
brother. I've a great respect for girls who know how to push their
way and make the most of circumstances. What sort of young fellow
is Lord Osborne?,"
"Plain and quiet," replied Emma.
"As if I did not know that," cried Penelope, "why, I've seen him
hundreds of time, child; almost before you were born. I mean is he
pleasant?—can he talk nonsense?—does he know how to make
himself agreeable?"
"That must depend upon taste," replied Emma, "he never was
particularly pleasant to me; and, as to his talking, it's neither good
sense, nor good nonsense."
"Do you know what good nonsense is, Emma?" cried Penelope,
"Why, then, I dare say you may not be quite detestable."
"I should hope not," said Emma, trying to smile.
"I thought your uncle might, perhaps, have made a Methodist of
you, and that would not have suited me. Those musty old doctors of
divinity have, sometimes, queer notions."
"I must beg, Penelope, when you mention my late uncle, you will
do so with respect," said Emma, with spirit.
Penelope looked surprised—and, for a moment, was silent; when
next she spoke it was to question Emma minutely, as to the quality,
price and texture of her dress, for the important day and night in
prospect.
"I expect Margaret will be ready to expire with envy, when she
sees the real Indian muslin that I mean to wear," pursued she, in a
tone of great satisfaction; "I am not going to tell you how I came by
it—for that's a great secret for some days to come. Is not Margaret
horridly jealous?"
Emma looked shocked.
"Oh, I see!" laughed Penelope, "you are too good to abuse a sister
—quite a Miss Charity or Miss Meek of a good little girl's prize book.
But, if you like to sit like a goose weighing every word you are about
to utter, I can tell you that does not suit me at all. I always say what
comes into my head, without caring for anybody."
As Emma, however, did not follow the same method, she did not
express how very unpleasant a course she considered it; and the
sisters did not quarrel then.
"How has Margaret got on with Tom Musgrove?" continued
Penelope, "by-the-bye, have you seen Tom Musgrove, yourself?"
"A little," said Emma.
"And how do you like him?—what do you think of him?—do you
think he is in love with Margaret?" pursued Penelope.
"No," replied Emma, answering only to the last question.
"Nor do I; I don't see that he is at all more in love with her, than
he has been with twenty other girls—myself included. But it's very
good fun talking to him when he is in spirits. Emma can you keep a
secret?"
"Yes, I hope so, when necessary; but I would rather have none to
keep."
"How absurd—why, it's the best fun possible, to have a good
secret; I would tell you one, if you would promise not to betray it."
"I shall be very happy to hear anything you like to tell me, and, I
dare say you would not ask me to do anything wrong."
"Wrong! why, are you such a little Methodist, as to consider
whether every thing is wrong—it's my own affair, and how can there
be anything wrong in my telling you if I like? If one always stops to
meditate whether any one would think a thing wrong, one might
give over talking altogether."
Emma was silent from not very well knowing what to say in reply;
and, after a momentary pause, Penelope went on:
"Now, the only reason I want you not to tell is, because I wish to
surprise all the others by the news some day. You will promise not to
mention it!"
"You had much better not tell me at all, Penelope; because then,
your secret will certainly be safe," said Emma, good-humouredly; "if
you, who are interested in it, cannot resist telling it—how can you
expect me to be proof to such a temptation?"
"You are very much mistaken," said Penelope, angrily tossing her
head, "if you suppose I cannot resist telling any thing I wish to keep
secret; I assure you, I am quite as discreet, when occasion requires,
as your little ladyship can be, though I do not set up to be so
superior to all my family, and give myself airs of discretion and
superfine prudence."
Emma saw she had made her sister angry—though she did know
exactly how or why, and she attempted, but vainly, to apologise for
the involuntary offence. Penelope was not to be propitiated.
"I can tell you, Miss Emma, it's no use at all, your trying to be so
grand and indifferent; it was not a trifling mark of my regard, what I
was going to tell you, but, if you do not wish to hear it, you may let
it alone. I dare say, Margaret will shew more interest in my
concerns; I can tell her some day."
And with these words, Penelope rose and hastily quitted the room,
slamming the door after her with all her might.
During the three succeeding days there was every possible
opportunity taken by her to display to Emma the superior confidence
with which Margaret was treated. Slips of paper were continually
thrown across the table, containing mysterious words or
incomprehensible signs. There was whispering too in corners, and
talking with their fingers; hints were thrown out, which convulsed
Margaret with laughing, but in which the uninitiated could see no
joke; and every means taken to raise a curiosity which would have
flattered Pen's self-importance. Elizabeth and Emma bore this
infliction with remarkable heroism—having a strong internal
conviction that a secret which required so much exertion to give it
importance could not be much worth knowing, or that it would soon
certainly become public.
Affairs were in this state when the important day, which had
already excited such intense speculation or anticipation in the minds
of the four sisters. Emma's toilette was very satisfactory to herself in
its results, she hoped she should not be the plainest or worst
dressed person in the room, and she certainly took especial care to
arrange her hair in a way that she had reason to think Mr. Howard
admired.
Duly were they transported to the scene of such great
anticipations, and when they had sufficiently arranged their dresses
and shaken out the creases, after being so very much squeezed,
they were marshalled up the grand staircase into the state-
apartment.
It was worth while to watch Margaret's countenance, when, for
the first time, contemplating the rich furniture and evidences of
wealth which surrounded her. An overpowering sense of her own
insignificance, and a conviction, that amidst so much that was rich,

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