Resilience

with
Sefi Kraut
Wednesday, September 4

Defining and Cultivating Resilience

This Resource is for Campus and Young Adult Educators

Resilience: The skills, attributes, and abilities that enable individuals to

adapt to hardships, difficulties, and challenges.

Categories of resilience skills:

Proactive orientation
Self-regulation
Achievements
Connections and attachments
Community systems

One Year On
Join our 3-Part Webinar to Prepare
for the Upcoming Holiday Season
and October 7 Anniversary
Texts on Resiliance and Guiding Questions to Use with Your Learners:

.‫תלמוד בבלי מסכת מנחות צט‬ Babylonian Talmud, Menachot 99a

1
‫“ָּב ֵע ת ַה ִה וא ָא ַמ ר ה' ֵא ַל י ְּפ ׇס ל־ְל ָך ְׁש ֵני־לּוֹחת ֲא ָב ִנים‬ The verse states: “At that time the Lord said
to me: Hew for yourself two tablets of stone
‫ָּכִר אֹׁשִנים…ְוֶא ְכ ֹּתב ַע ל־ַה ֻּלֹחת ֶא ת־ַה ְּד ָב ִר ים ֲא ֶׁש ר ָה יּו‬
like the first…And I will write on the tablets
‫ַע ל־ַה ֻּלֹחת ָה ִר אֹׁשִנים ֲא ֶׁש ר ִׁש ַּב ְר ָּת ְוַׂש ְמ ָּת ם ָּב ָא רֹון"׃‬ the words that were on the first tablets,
)‫ב‬-‫א‬:‫(דברים י‬ which you broke, and you shall put them in
the Ark” (Deuteronomy 10:1–2).

‫תני רב יוסף מלמד שהלוחות ושברי לוחות מונחין‬ Rav Yosef teaches a baraita: This verse
‫בארון מכאן לתלמיד חכם ששכח תלמודו מחמת‬ teaches that both the tablets of the
.‫אונסו שאין נוהגין בו מנהג בזיון‬ Covenant and the pieces of the broken
tablets are placed in the Ark. One should
learn from here that with regard to a Torah
scholar who has forgotten his Torah
knowledge due to circumstances beyond his
control (e.g., illness), one may not behave
toward him in a degrading manner.

What message does the Talmud give by saying that the broken tables were preserved alongside the
whole ones in the Ark?

2 Rabbi Shoshana Cohen, D'var Torah Ki Tissa: Brokenness & Forgetting

Real creativity and learning most often happens from a sense of deep need. When something
is missing we are most inspired to delve deep and apply our God-given intellect to create new
and innovative ideas. Moreover, in places of darkness and confusion, when we recognize that
something is missing we are most likely to turn to others to help us make sense of the world
and fill the void with wisdom.
The broken tablets in the ark remind us of the power of brokenness, of forgetting, to spark
innovation and the building of intellectual and spiritual community. In the words of Leonard
Cohen, “there is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets through.”

What “deep need” do you and your community have that emerged in the aftermath of the brokenness of
October 7?
3 :-.‫תלמוד בבלי מסכת מכות כד‬ Babylonian Talmud, Makkot 24a-b

‫ ֵּכיָון ֶׁש ִה ִּגיעּו ְל ַה ר‬,‫ׁש ּוב ַּפ ַע ם ַא ַח ת ָה יּו עֹוִל ין ִל ירּוָׁש ַל ִים‬ A] On another occasion, they were ascending to
Jerusalem. When they arrived at Mount Scopus
‫ ֵּכיָון ֶׁש ִה ִּגיעּו ְל ַה ר ַה ַּב ִית ָר אּו‬,‫ַה ּצ ֹוִפ ים ָק ְר עּו ִּב ְגֵד יֶה ם‬
(and saw the site of the destroyed Temple), they
‫ ִה ְת ִח ילּו ֵה ן ּב ֹוִכ ין‬,‫ׁש ּוָע ל ֶׁש ָּיָצ א ִמ ֵּב ית ׇק ְד ֵׁש י ַה ֳּק ָד ִׁש ים‬ tore their garments. When they arrived at the
.‫ְוַר ִּב י ֲעִק יָב א ְמ ַצ ֵח ק‬ Temple Mount, they saw a fox that emerged
?‫ ִמ ְּפ ֵני ָמ ה ַא ָּת ה ְמ ַצ ֵח ק‬:‫ָא ְמ רּו לֹו‬ from the site of the Holy of Holies. The Sages
began weeping, and Rabbi Akiva was laughing.
‫ ָמ קֹום‬:‫ ִמ ְּפ ֵני ָמ ה ַא ֶּת ם ּב ֹוִכ ים ָא ְמ רּו לֹו‬:‫ָא ַמ ר ָל ֶה ם‬
B] The Sages said to him: For what reason are
‫ ְוַע ְכ ָׁש יו ׁש ּוָע ִל ים ִה ְּל כּו‬,‫ֶׁש ָּכתּוב ּב ֹו ״ְוַה ָּזר ַה ָּק ֵר ב יּוָמ ת״‬ you laughing?
!?‫ ְוֹלא ִנְב ֶּכה‬,‫ּב ֹו‬ C] Rabbi Akiva said to them: For what reason are
‫ ״ְוָא ִע יָד ה ִּל י ֵע ִד ים‬:‫ ִּד ְכ ִת יב‬,‫ ְל ָכ ְך ֲא ִני ְמ ַצ ֵח ק‬:‫ָא ַמ ר ָל ֶה ן‬ you weeping?
D] The Sages said to him: This is the place
– ‫ֶנֱא ָמ ִנים ֵא ת אּוִר ָּיה ַה ֹּכֵה ן ְוֶא ת ְזַכְר ָיה ֶּב ן ְיֶב ֶר ְכ ָיהּו״‬
concerning which it is written, “And the non-
‫ְוִכ י ָמ ה ִע ְנַין אּוִר ָּיה ֵא ֶצ ל ְזַכְר ָיה? אּוִר ָּיה ְּב ִמ ְק ָּד ׁש‬ priest who approaches shall die” (Numbers
‫ ָּת ָל ה ַה ָּכתּוב‬:‫ ּוְזַכְר ָיה ְּב ִמ ְק ָּד ׁש ֵׁש ִני! ֶא ָּל א‬,‫ִר אׁש ֹון‬ 1:51), and now foxes walk in it. And shall we not
.‫ְנ בּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל ְזַכְר ָיה ִּב ְנ בּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל אּוִר ָּיה‬ weep?!
E] Rabbi Akiva said to them: That is why I am
,‫ְּב אּוִר ָּיה ְּכ ִת יב ״ָל ֵכן ִּב ְגַל ְל ֶכם ִצ ּיֹון ָׂש ֶד ה ֵת ָח ֵר ׁש ״‬
laughing. As it is written (in Isaiah 8:2), “And I will
‫ִּב ְזַכְר ָיה ְּכ ִת יב ״עֹוד ֵיְׁש בּו ְזֵק ִנים ּוְזֵק נֹות ִּב ְר ֹחבֹות‬ take to me faithful witnesses to attest - Uriah the
.‫ְירּוָׁש ִָל ם״‬ Priest, and Zechariah the son of Jeberechiah.”
‫ַע ד ֶׁש ֹּלא ִנְת ַק ְּייָמ ה ְנבּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל אּוִר ָּיה ָה ִייִת י ִמ ְת ָייֵר א‬ F] Now what is the connection between Uriah
and Zechariah?! Uriah prophesied during the
‫ ַע ְכ ָׁש יו ֶׁש ִּנְת ַק ְּייָמ ה‬,‫ֶׁש ֹּלא ִּת ְת ַק ֵּיים ְנבּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל ְזַכְר ָיה‬
First Temple period and Zechariah prophesied
‫ְנבּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל אּוִר ָּיה – ְּב ָידּוַע ֶׁש ְּנבּוָא תֹו ֶׁש ל ְזַכְר ָיה‬ during the Second Temple period. Rather, the
.‫ִמ ְת ַק ֶּייֶמ ת‬ verse (from Isaiah) established that the
‫ ֲעִק יָב א‬,‫ ֲעִק יָב א ִניַח ְמ ָּת נּו‬:‫ַּב ָּל ׁש ֹון ַה ֶּזה ָא ְמ רּו לֹו‬ fulfillment of the prophecy of Zechariah is
dependent on the fulfillment of the prophecy
.‫ִניַח ְמ ָּת נּו‬
of Uriah.
G] It is written in the prophecy of
Uriah,“Therefore, for your sake Zion shall be
plowed as a field, and Jerusalem shall become
rubble, and the Temple Mount as the high
places of a forest” (Micah 3:12).
H] It is written in the prophecy of Zechariah,
“There shall yet be elderly men and elderly
women sitting in the streets of Jerusalem, each
with staff in hand because of their great age”
(Zechariah 8:4).
I] Until the prophecy of Uriah was fulfilled, I was
afraid that the prophecy of Zechariah would not
be fulfilled. Now that the prophecy of Uriah WAS
fulfilled, it is evident that the prophecy of
Zechariah remains valid.
J] The Sages said to him: Akiva, you have
comforted us; Akiva, you have comforted us.

What is the difference between how the sages saw the situation at hand and how Rabbi Akiva saw it?
Have you felt yourself being more of a “sage” or more of a “Rabbi Akiva” since October 7? How so?
4
Fred Rogers, newspaper column, 1986
I was spared from any great disasters when I was little, but there was plenty of news of them in
newspapers and on the radio, and there were graphic images of them in newsreels.

For me, as for all children, the world could have come to seem a scary place to live. But I felt
secure with my parents, and they let me know that we were safely together whenever I showed
concern about accounts of alarming events in the world.

There was something else my mother did that I’ve always remembered: “Always look for the
helpers,” she’d tell me. “There’s always someone who is trying to help.” I did, and I came to see
that the world is full of doctors and nurses, police and firemen, volunteers, neighbors and
friends who are ready to jump in to help when things go wrong.

Who have been some of the “helpers” you have noticed and admired over the past year?
 ‫ב‬:‫אבות דרבי נתן ו‬ Midrash Avot D’Rabbi Natan 6:2
5
‫מה היה תחלתו של רבי עקיבא? אמרו בן ארבעים‬ What were Akiva's beginnings? It is said: Up
to the age of forty, he had not yet studied a
‫ פעם אחת היה עומד על פי‬.‫שנה היה ולא שנה כלום‬
thing. One time, he inquired while standing
‫הבאר אמר מי חקק אבן זו? אמרו לא המים שתדיר‬ at the mouth of the well, "Who carved out a
‫ אמרו [לו] עקיבא אי אתה‬.‫[נופלים] עליה בכל יום‬ hole in this stone?" They said to him, “It was
".‫קורא "אבנים שחקו מים‬ the water falling upon it constantly, day after
day. Akiva, haven't you read that 'water
‫מיד היה רבי עקיבא דן קל וחומר בעצמו מה רך‬
wears away stone' (Job 14:19)?
‫פסל את הקשה דברי תורה שקשה כברזל על אחת‬ Rabbi Akiva immediately applied this, all the
‫ מיד חזר‬.‫כמה וכמה שיחקקו את לבי שהוא בשר ודם‬ more so, to himself. He said: If something
.‫ללמוד תורה‬ soft can carve something hard, then all the
more so, the words of Torah, which are like
‫ א״ל רבי‬.‫הלך הוא ובנו וישבו אצל מלמדי תינוקות‬
steel, can engrave themselves on my heart,
‫ אחז רבי עקיבא בראש הלוח ובנו בראש‬.‫למדני תורה‬ which is but flesh and blood. He immediately
‫ (אלף תיו ולמדה‬. ‫הלוח כתב לו אלף בית ולמדה‬ went to start studying Torah.
‫ היה לומד והולך עד שלמד כל‬.)‫תורת כהנים ולמדה‬ He went with his son and they sat down by
the school teachers. He said to one: Rabbi,
.‫התורה כולה‬
teach me Torah! He then took hold of one
‫ אמר להם‬.‫הלך וישב לפני רבי אליעזר ולפני ר׳ יהושע‬ end of the tablet, and his son took hold of
‫רבותי פתחו לי טעם משנה כיון שאמר לו הלכה אחת‬ the other end. The teacher wrote down aleph
‫הלך וישב לו בינו לבין עצמו אמר (אלף זו למה‬ and beit for him, and he learned them (aleph
to tav, and he learned them; the book of
‫נכתבה בית זו למה נכתבה) דבר זה למה נאמר חזר‬
Leviticus, and he learned it). And he went on
.‫ושאלן והעמידן בדברים‬ studying until he learned the whole Torah.
Then he went and sat before Rabbi Eliezer
and Rabbi Joshua. "My masters," he said,
"reveal the sense of Mishnah to me." When
they told him one halakhah, he went off and
sat down to work it out for himself. This alef,
he wondered, what was it written for? That
bet - what was it written for? This teaching -
what was it uttered for? He kept coming
back, kept asking of Rabbi Eliezer and Rabbi
Joshua, until he reduced his teachers to
silence.

In what ways does Rabbi Akiva embody the characteristics of “resilience” in this text?

Overarching Question:
Which of the 5 categories of resilience might you want to
focus on for yourself?
 Group Discussion Questions:

1 Where have you seen resilience embodied over this past year?

2 Have you yourself felt resilient this past year? In what ways?

Which of these 5 categories of resilience might you want to

3
work on developing further?

Suggested Activities

Invite your learners to work on the skill

of Self Awareness (in the Resilience
category of Proactive Orientation) by
Teach your learners to engaging in a Feelings Walking Tour.
utilize the Thoughts on a (Thank you to Social-Emotional Learning
Train tool - a practice that consultant Dr. Nancy Parkes for this
activity!) After they practice this by
flexes their Resilience skill
considering their emotions in the spaces
of Visualization (in the they normally inhabit, they can then flex
category of Self Regulation). this muscle by considering how they feel
(Thank you to clinical in the communal spaces they have had
psychologist Dr. Regine to inhabit since October 7.
Galanti for this resource!)

Invite your learners to work on the skill

of Listening (in the Resilience category of
Connections and Attachments) by sitting
with a partner and asking Listening
Questions. (Thank you to Social-
Emotional Learning consultant Dr.
Nancy Parkes for this activity!) After they
have engaged in this exchange in a
general way, have them narrow their
answers to ones that have occupied
their thoughts since October 7.
 Closing Intention

‫טז‬:‫פרקי אבות ב‬ Pirkei Avot 2:16

‫ָך‬
‫ ְוֹלא ַא ָּת ה ֶב ן‬,‫ ֹלא ָע ֶלי ַה ְּמ ָל אָכה ִל ְגֹמר‬,‫הּוא ָה ָיה אֹוֵמ ר‬ He [Rabbi Tarfon] used to say: It is not
your duty to finish the work, but neither
…‫חֹוִר ין ִל ָּב ֵט ל ִמ ֶּמ ָּנה‬
are you at liberty to neglect it…

Resilience

Proactive Self-regulation Achievements Connections Community

Orientation and Attachments Systems

EXAMPLE OF SKILL: EXAMPLE OF SKILL: EXAMPLE OF SKILL: EXAMPLE OF SKILL: EXAMPLE OF SKILL:

SELF AWARENESS RELAXATION REALITY CHECKING EMPATHY

VISUALIZATION LISTENING