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ENG106 - Proposal - Peer Review Worksheet For Steve

The ENG-106 Peer Review Worksheet provides a structured approach for students to give feedback on proposal essays. The reviewer, Anneke Vos, praises Steve Ouma's draft for its clear argument, effective introduction, and thorough explanation of solutions, while suggesting improvements in the conclusion, editing, and clarity of thought. Overall, the feedback highlights both strengths and areas for enhancement in the essay.

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johnwilliammunyasia18
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8 views3 pages

ENG106 - Proposal - Peer Review Worksheet For Steve

The ENG-106 Peer Review Worksheet provides a structured approach for students to give feedback on proposal essays. The reviewer, Anneke Vos, praises Steve Ouma's draft for its clear argument, effective introduction, and thorough explanation of solutions, while suggesting improvements in the conclusion, editing, and clarity of thought. Overall, the feedback highlights both strengths and areas for enhancement in the essay.

Uploaded by

johnwilliammunyasia18
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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ENG-106 Peer Review Worksheet: Proposal Essay

Part of your responsibility as a student in this course is to provide quality feedback to your peers
that will help them to improve their writing skills. This worksheet will assist you in providing
that feedback. To highlight the text and type over the information in the boxes on this worksheet,
double-click on the first word.

Name of the draft’s author: Steve Ouma


Name of the peer reviewer: Anneke Vos

Reviewer
After reading through the draft one time, write a summary (3-5 sentences) of the paper that
includes your assessment of how well the essay meets the assignment requirements as
specified in the syllabus and the rubric.
You laid out a good argument. You had multiple levels of a solution, and you conveyed it clearly. You
also had a good length for your paper.

After a second, closer reading of the draft, answer each of the following questions. Positive
answers will give you specific elements of the draft to praise; negative answers will indicate
areas in need of improvement and revision. Please be sure to indicate at least three positive
aspects of the draft and at least three areas for improvement in reply to the questions at the
bottom of this worksheet.
Proposal Content and Ideas
 How effectively does the thesis statement identify the main points that the writer would
like to make in this proposal?
It was pretty effective, it laid out where you were going with the paper, but left the explaining for
later in the paper.
 How successfully does the paper focus on presenting a well-reasoned proposal?
Fairly succesfully. You had arguments and justification, and proposed solutions.
 How persuasively is evidence used to justify ideas and enrich the essay?
I think that maybe using quotes would be a little more persuasive than just putting a reference at
the end of a sentence. Using a quote helps the reader to identify exactly what you are using as
evidence.
 How effectively does the essay incorporate strategies that support proposals (e.g.,
categorical, resemblance, ethical claims, and cause and effect claims)?
I didn't notice very many of these present in the paper.
Organization
 How effectively does the introduction engage the reader while providing an overview of
the paper?
Very effectively. The introduction was a good attention grabber, it kind of whetted the reader's
appetite for the rest of the paper.
 Please identify the writer’s thesis and quote it in the box below.
'By implementing regulations, fostering educational campaigns and social support along with
international cooperation, there will be mitigation of the adverse effects of organ trafficking and
exploitation.'
 How effectively do the paragraphs develop the topic sentence and advance the essay’s
ideas?
Pretty effectively. I could see the thesis in most of the paragraphs, but not as much in the
conclusion.
 How effectively does the conclusion provide a strong, satisfying ending, not a mere
summary of the essay?
The conclusion could connect more with the thesis, and maybe end with something a little more
thought-provoking.

Format
 How closely does the paper follow APA formatting style? Is it double-spaced in 12 pt.
Times New Roman font? Does it have 1" margins? Does it use headers (page numbers
using appropriate header function)? Does it have a proper heading (with student’s name,
date, course, and instructor’s name)?
Yes No Add optional clarification here
 Are all information, quotations, and borrowed ideas cited in parenthetical APA format?
Yes No Add optional clarification here
 Are all sources listed on the references page in APA format?
Yes No Add optional clarification here
 Is the required minimum number of sources listed?
Yes No Add optional clarification here
Language Use and Style
 Are the voice and tone of the essay effective in characterizing ideas and creating the
appropriate mood? If “No,” please provide examples of ineffective or inappropriate voice
and tone.
Yes No There were a few places were you used 'we', I believe that that is specified in the
instruction to not use pronouns like that.
 How effectively does the paper incorporate a variety of sentence structures that
strengthen the ideas, create vitality, and avoid choppiness in the writing?
Yes No Add optional clarification here
 How would you assess the writer’s diction (i.e., word choice)? Does the writer use active
verbs, concrete nouns, and precise words?
Yes No Add optional clarification here

Grammar and Mechanics


 Does the writer use proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling? If “No,” please provide
examples of errors in need of correction.
Yes No There were a few places where there typos.
 Is the writing clear and comprehensible throughout the draft? If “No,” please provide
examples in need of improvement.
Yes No There were some areas where it was a little confusing traying to follow your train
of thought. I wasn't sure if it was a typo or if a certain word was supposed to be in the sentence.

Three things that I liked about your draft are:

1. You thought through your solution well.


2. You had a good introductory paragraph.
3. You took time to explain things.

Three things that could be improved are:

1. Your conclusion could be a little stronger.


2. Do a little more editing.
3. Make sure your thoughts flow in a way easy to follow.

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