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Schema Handout - Vulnerable Child (2)

The document discusses the Vulnerable Child Mode (VCM) in Schema Mode Therapy, emphasizing its role in holding traumatic memories and emotional distress. It highlights the importance of addressing unmet childhood needs through healthy coping strategies and the necessity of the Healthy Adult Mode to soothe the VCM. The document also outlines methods for managing and soothing the VCM, including identifying triggers and developing a plan for self-care.

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Ádám Képek
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20 views

Schema Handout - Vulnerable Child (2)

The document discusses the Vulnerable Child Mode (VCM) in Schema Mode Therapy, emphasizing its role in holding traumatic memories and emotional distress. It highlights the importance of addressing unmet childhood needs through healthy coping strategies and the necessity of the Healthy Adult Mode to soothe the VCM. The document also outlines methods for managing and soothing the VCM, including identifying triggers and developing a plan for self-care.

Uploaded by

Ádám Képek
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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APRIL 2024

VULNERABLE CHILD MODE

Vulnerable Child Mode The Importance of the Vulnerable Child Mode


Understanding the role of Understanding why this mode is essential in Schema Mode
unmet needs Therapy
As infants, we are inherently The Vulnerable Child Mode (VCM) is at the core of everything in
vulnerable. We rely on our Schema Mode Therapy. This is because the VCM is where we hold our
caregivers for everything memories of painful experiences, distressing emotions and often
because we can’t do a thing for intense sensations. Thus, the VCM is where we hold our trauma. It is
ourselves. While we need them understandable that most people want to detach from their VCM by
to feed us and changes us, ignoring it, shutting it down or trying to get rid of it, because they don't
what we really need is to feel want to reconnect with these feelings.
loved, safe and wanted. We
need a parent to respond to us This is problematic because the way people try to get rid of their
when we are distressed and feelings often involves unhelpful coping strategies which often cause
soothe us until we feel calm. more difficulties later. Hence, we call them Maladaptive Coping Modes
This tells us that we are safe. (MCM).

Over time, children still need The whole point of Schema Mode Therapy is to heal the Vulnerable
adults to help them manage Child using healthy coping strategies from the Healthy Adult Mode and
their feelings appropriately so to reduce the impact of the MCM and the Dysfunctional Parent Modes
they learn to be skilful in (Punitive and Demanding).
tolerating intense emotions. If
this doesn't happen, the child This creates space for the VCM to heal from past memories, learn to
gets overwhelmed by the tolerate intense emotions and experience feelings of safety and comfort
feelings and will use to as adults.
primitive strategies to cope The Role of the Healthy Adult Mode
such as Fight, Flight or Freeze.
Healthy Adult Mode soothes the Vulnerable Child
If a child doesn't learn skilful In Schema Mode Therapy, the Healthy Adult Mode needs to learn how to
ways to tolerate their feelings connect with your Vulnerable Child and notice when it is triggered by
or receive support to get their unmet needs. Once it has been activated, we need to learn how to
needs met, then they become soothe it. Just as a young child needs to be held, cuddled, supported and
adults who still don't know how soothed, we must learn how to do this for our own inner child. This can
to deal with their feelings or get be very challenging for people who never had these early experiences of
their needs met. For people being soothed, or for those who hold on to beliefs that vulnerability is
who have experienced early bad or that their experiences of abuse are their fault, so they must blame
trauma, abuse, bullying or their inner child.
neglect, the amount of distress
they feel is intense. This can Schema Mode Therapy will require you to identify your needs and work
manifest as feeling scared, out which ones you need to meet for yourself. Then you need to commit
anxious, distressed, lonely, to treating your Vulnerable Child in the way they deserved to be treated -
unwanted or worthless. with love, affection and compassion.

Schema Mode Therapy believes


that unmet needs in childhood
can be addressed by learning
how to meet your own needs in
Needs Soothe Practise
adulthood to soothe your inner Learn what your Learn how to soothe Practise acting
Vulnerable Child. Vulnerable Child needs yourself when you are differently towards
to feel safe and feeling vulnerable. your vulnerability.
wanted.
THEPSYCHCOLLECTIVE.COM VULNERABLE CHILD MODE
Soothing your Vulnerable Child Mode
Mode Awareness
To learn how to soothe your Vulnerable Child, you must first become aware of when you have flipped into that
mode. For many people, this can be very challenging as they don’t want to face it or they are so used to detaching
from it, that it has become unfamiliar.

What are some common triggers for this mode? (People, comments, situations, feelings)

What do you feel when you’re in this mode? (Scared, lonely, sad, worthless, unwanted, anxious)

What difficulties do you experience when you’re in this mode? (Self-harm, impulsivity, overwhelmed)

Mode Management
Develop a plan about how you will use your Healthy Adult to soothe your Vulnerable Child.

What are your goals for managing this mode? (To learn how to accept my vulnerability, not reject it)

What are your needs in this mode? (Safety, connection, validation)

What can you do to get this need met by others? (Ask for help, talk to someone, express needs)

What will you do to meet these needs for yourself? (Self-validate, take time out, blanket hug)

What will you say to yourself when you’re in this mode to soothe it? (I can get through this feeling)

You may find this hard because it is unfamiliar, or you may notice other modes getting in the way, like a
Maladaptive Coping Mode or a Parent Mode. Keep trying and remember that you are learning new strategies for
meeting your own needs that have previously been neglected.

Developed by Jessica O'Garr and Dr Al Griskaitis


Click on or scan the QR code to watch the video.
more?
SCHEMA THERAPY WORKBOOK SCHEMA MODE THERAPY WORKBOOK
This 68 page PDF contains 20 This 60 page PDF contains 17 worksheets
worksheets for the maladaptive for every single mode we discuss in our
schemas, 14 worksheets for Schema Videos, plus handouts for the list
adaptive schemas and 5 worksheets of schemas and needs.
for needs.
need

SCHEMA THERAPY SCHEMA MODE


TREATMENT GUIDE TREATMENT GUIDE
An instructional guide for those An instructional guide for those
undertaking Schema Therapy, undertaking Schema Mode Therapy,
including therapist scripts, extra
including therapist scripts, extra
worksheets and more details
factsheets. worksheets and more details
factsheets.

SCHEMA CARDS SCHEMA MODE CARDS


Contains 43 cards about Contains 50 cards about
Maladaptive Schemas, Schema Modes, Healthy
Adaptive Schemas & Needs Adult Skills & Schema
Techniques

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