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STATISTICS
Fourth Edition
I dedicate this book to the memory of my mother and father, Dolores J.
Coolidge and Paul L. Coolidge; to my mother who always bought me any
book I wanted and to my father who encouraged me to be a teacher.
Sara Miller McCune founded SAGE Publishing in 1965 to support the
dissemination of usable knowledge and educate a global community.
SAGE publishes more than 1000 journals and over 800 new books each
year, spanning a wide range of subject areas. Our growing selection of
library products includes archives, data, case studies and video. SAGE
remains majority owned by our founder and after her lifetime will become
owned by a charitable trust that secures the company’s continued
independence.

Los Angeles | London | New Delhi | Singapore | Washington DC |

Melbourne
STATISTICS
A Gentle Introduction

Fourth Edition

Frederick L. Coolidge

University of Colorado, Colorado Springs

Los Angeles
 London

New Delhi

Singapore

Washington DC

Melbourne
 Copyright © 2021 by SAGE Publications, Inc.

All rights reserved. Except as permitted by U.S. copyright law, no part of

this work may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means,
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endorsement by, the holders of said trademarks. SPSS is a registered
trademark of International Business Machines Corporation.

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BRIEF CONTENTS
Preface
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Chapter 1 • A Gentle Introduction
Chapter 2 • Descriptive Statistics: Understanding Distributions of
Numbers
Chapter 3 • Statistical Parameters: Measures of Central Tendency
and Variation
Chapter 4 • Standard Scores, the z Distribution, and Hypothesis
Testing
Chapter 5 • Inferential Statistics: The Controlled Experiment,
Hypothesis Testing, and the z Distribution
Chapter 6 • An Introduction to Correlation and Regression
Chapter 7 • The t Test for Independent Groups
Chapter 8 • The t Test for Dependent Groups
Chapter 9 • Analysis of Variance (ANOVA): One-Factor Completely
Randomized Design
Chapter 10 • After a Significant ANOVA: Multiple Comparison Tests
Chapter 11 • Analysis of Variance (ANOVA): One-Factor Repeated-
Measures Design
Chapter 12 • Factorial ANOVA: Two-Factor Completely Randomized
Design
Chapter 13 • Post Hoc Analysis of Factorial ANOVA
Chapter 14 • Factorial ANOVA: Additional Designs
Chapter 15 • Nonparametric Statistics: The Chi-Square Test and
Other Nonparametric Tests
Chapter 16 • Other Statistical Topics, Parameters, and Tests
Appendix A: z Distribution
Appendix B: t Distribution
Appendix C: Spearman’s Correlation
Appendix D: Chi-Square χ2 Distribution
Appendix E: F Distribution
Appendix F: Tukey’s Table
Appendix G: Mann–Whitney U Critical Values
Appendix H: Wilcoxon Signed-Rank Test Critical Values
Appendix I: Answers to Odd-Numbered Test Yourself Questions
Glossary
References
Index
DETAILED CONTENTS
Preface
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Chapter 1 • A Gentle Introduction

How Much Math Do I Need to Do Statistics?

The General Purpose of Statistics: Understanding the World

Another Purpose of Statistics: Making an Argument or a Decision

What Is a Statistician?

One Role: The Curious Detective

Another Role: The Honest Attorney
A Final Role: A Good Storyteller
Liberal and Conservative Statisticians
Descriptive and Inferential Statistics
Experiments Are Designed to Test Theories and Hypotheses
Oddball Theories
Bad Science and Myths
Eight Essential Questions of Any Survey or Study

1. Who Was Surveyed or Studied?

2. Why Did the People Participate in the Study?
3. Was There a Control Group, and Did the Control Group
Receive a Placebo?
4. How Many People Participated in the Study?
5. How Were the Questions Worded to the Participants in the
Study?
6. Was Causation Assumed From a Correlational Study?
7. Who Paid for the Study?
8. Was the Study Published in a Peer-Reviewed Journal?
On Making Samples Representative of the Population
Experimental Design and Statistical Analysis as Controls
The Language of Statistics
On Conducting Scientific Experiments
The Dependent Variable and Measurement
Operational Definitions
Measurement Error
Measurement Scales: The Difference Between Continuous and
Discrete Variables
Types of Measurement Scales

Nominal Scales
Ordinal Scales
Interval Scales
Ratio Scales
Rounding Numbers and Rounding Error

Percentages
Statistical Symbols
Summary
History Trivia: Achenwall to Nightingale
Key Terms
Chapter 1 Practice Problems
Chapter 1 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 1

Opening the Program

Creating a Data File
Changing the Display Format for New Numeric Variables
Entering Variable Names
Entering Data
Numeric Variables Versus String Variables
Saving Your Data
Changing the Folder Where Your Data Are Saved
Opening and Saving Your Data Files
Chapter 2 • Descriptive Statistics: Understanding Distributions of
Numbers

The Purpose of Graphs and Tables: Making Arguments and

Decisions

How a Good Graph Stopped a Cholera Epidemic

How Bad Graphs and Tables Contributed to the Space Shuttle
 Challenger Explosion
How a Poor PowerPoint® Presentation Contributed to the Space
Shuttle Columbia Disaster
A Summary of the Purpose of Graphs and Tables

1. Document the Sources of Statistical Data and Their

Characteristics
2. Make Appropriate Comparisons
3. Demonstrate the Mechanisms of Cause and Effect and Express
the Mechanisms Quantitatively
4. Recognize the Inherent Multivariate Nature of Analytic
Problems
5. Inspect and Evaluate Alternative Hypotheses
Graphical Cautions
Frequency Distributions
Shapes of Frequency Distributions
Grouping Data Into Intervals
Advice on Grouping Data Into Intervals

1. Choose Interval Widths That Reduce Your Data to 5 to 10

Intervals
2. Choose the Size of Your Interval Widths Based on
Understandable Units, for Example, Multiples of 5 or 10
3. Make Sure That Your Chosen Intervals Do Not Overlap
The Cumulative Frequency Distribution
Cumulative Percentages, Percentiles, and Quartiles
Stem-and-Leaf Plot
Non-normal Frequency Distributions
On the Importance of the Shapes of Distributions
Additional Thoughts About Good Graphs Versus Bad Graphs

Low-Density Graphs
Chart Junk
Changing Scales Midstream (or Mid-Axis)
Labeling the Graph Badly
The Multicolored Graph
PowerPoint® Graphs and Presentations
History Trivia: De Moivre to Tukey
Key Terms
Chapter 2 Practice Problems
Chapter 2 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 2

Creating a Frequency Distribution

Creating a Bar Chart
Creating a Histogram
Understanding Skewness and Kurtosis
Describing the Total Autistic Symptoms Data
Describing the Schizoid Personality Disorder Data
Chapter 3 • Statistical Parameters: Measures of Central Tendency
and Variation

Measures of Central Tendency

The Mean
The Median

Method 1
Method 2
The Mode
Choosing Among Measures of Central Tendency
Klinkers and Outliers
Uncertain or Equivocal Results
Measures of Variation

The Range
The Standard Deviation
Correcting for Bias in the Sample Standard Deviation
How the Square Root of x2 Is Almost Equivalent to Taking the
Absolute Value of x
The Computational Formula for Standard Deviation
The Variance
The Sampling Distribution of Means, the Central Limit Theorem, and
the Standard Error of the Mean
The Use of the Standard Deviation for Prediction
Practical Uses of the Empirical Rule: As a Definition of an Outlier
Practical Uses of the Empirical Rule: Prediction and IQ Tests
Some Further Comments
History Trivia: Fisher to Eels
Key Terms
Chapter 3 Practice Problems
Chapter 3 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 3

Generating Central Tendency and Variation Statistics

Chapter 4 • Standard Scores, the z Distribution, and Hypothesis
Testing

Standard Scores
The Classic Standard Score: The z Score and the z Distribution
Calculating z Scores
More Practice on Converting Raw Data Into z Scores
Converting z Scores to Other Types of Standard Scores
The z Distribution
Interpreting Negative z Scores
Testing the Predictions of the Empirical Rule With the z Distribution
Why Is the z Distribution so Important?
How We Use the z Distribution to Test Experimental Hypotheses
More Practice With the z Distribution and T Scores

Example 1: Finding the Area in a z Distribution That Falls Above a

Known Score Where the Known Score Is Above the Mean
Example 2: Finding the Area in a z Distribution That Falls Below a
Known Score Where the Known Score Is Above the Mean
Example 3: Finding the Area in a z Distribution That Falls Below a
Known Score Where the Known Score Is Below the Mean
Example 4: Finding The Area in a z Distribution That Falls Above
a Known Score Where the Known Score Is Below the Mean
Example 5: Finding The Area in a z Distribution That Falls
Between Two Known Scores Where Both Known Scores Are
Above the Mean
Example 6: Finding The Area in a z Distribution That Falls
Between Two Known Scores Where One Known Score Is Above
the Mean and One Is Below the Mean
Example 7: Finding the Area in a z Distribution That Falls Between
Two Known Scores
Summarizing Scores Through Percentiles
History Trivia: Karl Pearson to Egon Pearson
Key Terms
Chapter 4 Practice Problems
Chapter 4 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 4

Transforming Raw Scores Into z Scores

Transforming z Scores Into T Scores
Chapter 5 • Inferential Statistics: The Controlled Experiment,
Hypothesis Testing, and the z Distribution

Hypothesis Testing in the Controlled Experiment

Hypothesis Testing: The Big Decision
How the Big Decision Is Made: Back to the z Distribution
The Parameter of Major Interest in Hypothesis Testing: The Mean
Nondirectional and Directional Alternative Hypotheses
A Debate: Retain the Null Hypothesis or Fail to Reject the Null
Hypothesis
The Null Hypothesis as a Nonconservative Beginning
The Four Possible Outcomes in Hypothesis Testing

1. Correct Decision: Retain H0 When H0 Is Actually True

2. Type I Error: Reject H0 When H0 Is Actually True
3. Correct Decision: Reject H0 When H0 Is Actually False
4. Type II Error: Retain H0 When H0 Is Actually False
Significance Levels
Significant and Nonsignificant Findings
Trends, and Does God Really Love the .05 Level of Significance More
Than the .06 Level?
Directional or Nondirectional Alternative Hypotheses: Advantages and
Disadvantages
Did Nuclear Fusion Occur?
Baloney Detection

How Reliable Is the Source of the Claim?

Does This Source Often Make Similar Claims?
Have the Claims Been Verified by Another Source?
How Does the Claim Fit With Known Natural Scientific Laws?
 Can the Claim Be Disproven, or Has Only Supportive Evidence
Been Sought?
Do the Claimants’ Personal Beliefs and Biases Drive Their
Conclusions or Vice Versa?
Conclusions About Science and Pseudoscience
The Most Critical Elements in the Detection of Baloney in Suspicious
Studies and Fraudulent Claims
Can Statistics Solve Every Problem?
Probability

The Lady Tasting Tea

The Definition of the Probability of an Event
The Multiplication Theorem of Probability
Combinations Theorem of Probability
Permutations Theorem of Probability
Fun With Probabilities
The Monty Hall Game
Gambler’s Fallacy
Coda
History Trivia: Egon Pearson to Karl Pearson
Key Terms
Chapter 5 Practice Problems
Chapter 5 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 5

Removing a Case From a Data Set

Adding a Variable
Deleting a Variable
Inserting a Variable
Moving a Variable
Selecting a Particular Condition for Analysis Within a Data Set
Copying Selected Cases or Conditions to a New Data Set
Chapter 6 • An Introduction to Correlation and Regression

Correlation: Use and Abuse

A Warning: Correlation Does Not Imply Causation

1. Marijuana Use and Heroin Use Are Positively Correlated

2. Milk Use Is Positively Correlated to Cancer Rates
 3. Weekly Church Attendance Is Negatively Correlated With Drug
Abuse
4. Lead Levels Are Positively Correlated With Antisocial Behavior
5. The Risk of Getting Alzheimer’s Disease Is Negatively
Correlated With Smoking Cigarettes
6. Sexual Activity Is Negatively Correlated With Increases in
Education
7. An Active Sex Life Is Positively Correlated With Longevity
8. Coffee Drinking Is Negatively Correlated With Suicidal Risk
9. Excessive Drinking and Smoking Causes Women to Be Abused
Another Warning: Chance Is Lumpy
Correlation and Prediction
The Four Common Types of Correlation
The Pearson Product–Moment Correlation Coefficient
Testing for the Significance of a Correlation Coefficient
Obtaining the Critical Values of the t Distribution

Step 1: Choose a One-Tailed or Two-Tailed Test of Significance

Step 2: Choose the Level of Significance
Step 3: Determine the Degrees of Freedom (df)
Step 4: Determine Whether the t from the Formula (Called the
Derived t) Exceeds the Tabled Critical Values From the t
Distribution
If the Null Hypothesis Is Rejected
Representing the Pearson Correlation Graphically: The Scatterplot
Fitting the Points With a Straight Line: The Assumption of a Linear
Relationship
Interpretation of the Slope of the Best-Fitting Line
The Assumption of Homoscedasticity
The Coefficient of Determination: How Much One Variable Accounts
for Variation in Another Variable—The Interpretation of r2
Quirks in the Interpretation of Significant and Nonsignificant
Correlation Coefficients
Linear Regression
Reading the Regression Line

The World Is a Complex Place: Any Single Behavior Is Most Often

Caused by Multiple Variables
R
 R-Square
Adjusted R-Square
Final Thoughts About Multiple Regression Analyses: A Warning
About the Interpretation of the Significant Beta Coefficients
Spearman’s Correlation
Significance Test for Spearman’s r
Ties in Ranks
Point-Biserial Correlation
Testing for the Significance of the Point-Biserial Correlation
Coefficient
Phi (Φ) Correlation
Testing for the Significance of Phi
History Trivia: Galton to Fisher
Key Terms
Chapter 6 Practice Problems
Chapter 6 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 6

Analyzing the Pearson Product–Moment Correlation

Creating a Scatterplot
Using the Paste Function in the Syntax Editor
Chapter 7 • The t Test for Independent Groups

The Statistical Analysis of the Controlled Experiment

One t Test but Two Designs
Assumptions of the Independent t Test

Independent Groups
Normality of the Dependent Variable
Homogeneity of Variance
The Formula for the Independent t Test
You Must Remember This! An Overview of Hypothesis Testing With
the t Test
What Does the t Test Do? Components of the t Test Formula
What If the Two Variances Are Radically Different From One
Another?
A Computational Example

Steps in the t Test Formula

 Testing the Null Hypothesis
Steps in Determining Significance
When H0 Has Been Rejected
Marginal Significance
The Power of a Statistical Test
Effect Size
The Correlation Coefficient of Effect Size
Another Measure of Effect Size: Cohen’s d
Confidence Intervals
Estimating the Standard Error
History Trivia: Gosset and Guinness Brewery
Key Terms
Chapter 7 Practice Problems
Chapter 7 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 7

Conducting a t Test for Independent Groups

Interpreting a t Test for Independent Groups
Conducting a t Test for Independent Groups for a Different
Variable
Interpreting a t Test for Independent Groups for a Different
Variable
Chapter 8 • The t Test for Dependent Groups

Variations on the Controlled Experiment

Design 1

Example of Design 1
Design 2

Example of Design 2
Design 3

Example of Design 3
Assumptions of the Dependent t Test
Why the Dependent t Test May Be More Powerful Than the
Independent t Test
How to Increase the Power of a t Test
Drawbacks of the Dependent t Test Designs
One-Tailed or Two-Tailed Tests of Significance
Hypothesis Testing and the Dependent t Test: Design 1
Design 1 (Same Participants or Repeated Measures): A
Computational Example

Determination of Effect Size

Design 2 (Matched Pairs): A Computational Example

Determination of Effect Size

Design 3 (Same Participants and Balanced Presentation): A
Computational Example

Determination of Effect Size

History Trivia: Fisher to Pearson
Key Terms
Chapter 8 Practice Problems
Chapter 8 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 8

Conducting a t Test for Dependent Groups

Interpreting a t Test for Dependent Groups
Chapter 9 • Analysis of Variance (ANOVA): One-Factor Completely
Randomized Design

A Limitation of Multiple t Tests and a Solution

The Equally Unacceptable Bonferroni Solution
The Acceptable Solution: An Analysis of Variance
The Null and Alternative Hypotheses in ANOVA
The Beauty and Elegance of the F Test Statistic
The F Ratio
How Can There Be Two Different Estimates of Within-Groups
Variance?
ANOVA Designs
ANOVA Assumptions
Pragmatic Overview
What a Significant ANOVA Indicates
A Computational Example
Degrees of Freedom for the Numerator
Degrees of Freedom for the Denominator
Determining Effect Size in ANOVA: Omega Squared (ω2)
Another Measure of Effect Size: Eta (ηη)
History Trivia: Gosset to Fisher
Key Terms
Chapter 9 Practice Problems
Chapter 9 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 9

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting a One-Factor Completely Randomized ANOVA
Interpreting a One-Factor Completely Randomized ANOVA
Chapter 10 • After a Significant ANOVA: Multiple Comparison Tests

Conceptual Overview of Tukey’s Test

Computation of Tukey’s HSD Test
What to Do If the Number of Error Degrees of Freedom Is Not Listed
in the Table of Tukey’s q Values
Determining What It All Means
Warning!
On the Importance of Nonsignificant Mean Differences
Final Results of ANOVA
Quirks in Interpretation
Tukey’s With Unequal Ns
Key Terms
Chapter 10 Practice Problems
Chapter 10 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 10

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting a Multiple Comparison Test
Interpreting a Multiple Comparison Test
Conducting a Multiple Comparison Test for Another Variable
Interpreting a Multiple Comparison Test for Another Variable
Chapter 11 • Analysis of Variance (ANOVA): One-Factor Repeated-
Measures Design
The Repeated-Measures ANOVA
Assumptions of the One-Factor Repeated-Measures ANOVA
Computational Example
Determining Effect Size in ANOVA
Key Terms
Chapter 11 Practice Problems
Chapter 11 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 11

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting a One-Factor Repeated-Measures Design ANOVA
Interpreting a One-Factor Repeated-Measures Design ANOVA
Chapter 12 • Factorial ANOVA: Two-Factor Completely Randomized
Design

Factorial Designs
The Most Important Feature of a Factorial Design: The Interaction
Fixed and Random Effects and In Situ Designs
The Null Hypotheses in a Two-Factor ANOVA
Assumptions and Unequal Numbers of Participants
Computational Example

Computation of the First Main Effect

Computation of the Second Main Effect
Computation of the Interaction Between the Two Main Effects
Interpretation of the Results
Key Terms
Chapter 12 Practice Problems
Chapter 12 Test Yourself Problems
SPSS Lesson 12

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting an ANOVA Two-Factor Completely Randomized
Design
Interpreting an ANOVA Two-Factor Completely Randomized
Design
Chapter 13 • Post Hoc Analysis of Factorial ANOVA
Main Effect Interpretation: Gender
Why a Multiple Comparison Test Is Unnecessary for a Two-Level
Main Effect, and When Is a Multiple Comparison Test Necessary?
Main Effect: Age Levels
Multiple Comparison Test for the Main Effect for Age
Warning: Limit Your Main Effect Conclusions When the Interaction Is
Significant
Multiple Comparison Tests
Interpretation of the Interaction Effect

For the ADHD Men

For the ADHD Women
ADHD Men Versus ADHD Women
Final Summary
Writing Up the Results Journal Style
Language to Avoid
Exploring the Possible Outcomes in a Two-Factor ANOVA
Determining Effect Size in a Two-Factor ANOVA
History Trivia: Fisher and Smoking
Key Terms
Chapter 13 Practice Problems
Chapter 13 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 13

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting a Post Hoc Analysis of Factorial ANOVA
Interpreting a Post Hoc Analysis of Factorial ANOVA for the Main
Effect
Conducting a Post Hoc Analysis of a Significant Interaction in
Factorial ANOVA With a Group Variable
Interpreting a Post Hoc Analysis of a Significant Interaction in
Factorial ANOVA With a Group Variable
Chapter 14 • Factorial ANOVA: Additional Designs

The Split-Plot Design

Overview of the Split-Plot ANOVA
Computational Example
 Main Effect: Social Facilitation
Main Effect: Trials
Interaction: Social Facilitation × Trials
Two-Factor ANOVA: Repeated Measures on Both Factors Design
Overview of the Repeated-Measures ANOVA
Computational Example
Key Terms
Chapter 14 Practice Problems
Chapter 14 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 14

Required Data
Downloading the Data Set to Your Desktop
Conducting a Split-Plot ANOVA
A Second Two-Factor ANOVA Design in SPSS
Required Data
Conducting a Repeated-Measures ANOVA
Chapter 15 • Nonparametric Statistics: The Chi-Square Test and
Other Nonparametric Tests

Overview of the Purpose of Chi-Square

Overview of Chi-Square Designs
Chi-Square Test: Two-Cell Design (Equal Probabilities Type)

Computation of the Two-Cell Design

The Chi-Square Distribution
Assumptions of the Chi-Square Test
Chi-Square Test: Two-Cell Design (Different Probabilities Type)

Computation of the Two-Cell Design

Interpreting a Significant Chi-Square Test for a Newspaper
Chi-Square Test: Three-Cell Experiment (Equal Probabilities Type)

Computation of the Three-Cell Design

Chi-Square Test: Two-by-Two Design

Computation of the Two-by-Two Design

What to Do After a Chi-Square Test Is Significant
When Cell Frequencies Are Less Than 5 Revisited
Other Nonparametric Tests

Mann–Whitney U Test
Wilcoxon Test for Two Dependent Groups
History Trivia: Pearson and Biometrika
Key Terms
Chapter 15 Practice Problems
Chapter 15 Test Yourself Questions
SPSS Lesson 15

Building a Data Set for a Chi-Square Test

Conducting a Chi-Square Test
Interpreting a Chi-Square Test
Chapter 16 • Other Statistical Topics, Parameters, and Tests

Big Data
Health Science Statistics

Test Characteristics
Risk Assessment
Parameters of Mortality and Morbidity
Additional Statistical Analyses and Multivariate Statistics

Analysis of Covariance
Multivariate Analysis of Variance
Multivariate Analysis of Covariance
Factor Analysis
Multiple Regression
Structural Equation Modeling
Canonical Correlation
Cluster Analysis
Linear Discriminant Function Analysis
A Summary of Multivariate Statistics
Coda
Key Terms
Chapter 16 Practice Problems
Chapter 16 Test Yourself Questions
Appendix A: z Distribution
Appendix B: t Distribution
Appendix C: Spearman’s Correlation
Appendix D: Chi-Square χ2 Distribution
Appendix E: F Distribution
Appendix F: Tukey’s Table
Appendix G: Mann–Whitney U Critical Values
Appendix H: Wilcoxon Signed-Rank Test Critical Values
Appendix I: Answers to Odd-Numbered Test Yourself Questions
Glossary
References
Index
PREFACE
One of the best teachers I had as an undergraduate was my introductory
statistics professor. I do not remember being overly fond of the discipline
of statistics, but I liked his enthusiasm for his subject matter, his
applications of what we learned to the real world, and his
professionalism. I later had a small crush on one of the “older”
psychology graduate students, who taught an advanced undergraduate
statistics course. I took three more required statistics classes as a
psychology graduate student myself and then two more elective statistics
classes. Yet, I still did not see myself as particularly interested in teaching
statistics until my fourth year as a professor, when another professor’s
resignation meant that someone needed to volunteer to teach
undergraduate statistics. I quickly fell in love with teaching statistics to
undergraduates. I finally saw myself how statistics helps people make
informed decisions. I also realized how easy it was to teach statistics
badly and how much more difficult it was to make complex concepts
easily understood by undergraduates who either feared statistics or had
heard horror stories from other students about how awful statistics
classes were. Reducing students’ fears and showing them how
interesting a statistics course could be became my mission, and I
realized I loved it. It became half of my teaching load each year, and I
was rewarded with three outstanding teaching awards over the next 11
years, including the University of Colorado’s lifetime title, Presidential
Teaching Scholar. I had also been gathering notes since my first
graduate statistics class on how better to present statistical tests and
statistical concepts. Thus, when I first formally taught a statistics class, I
was armed with a packet of notes, which ultimately became the first
edition of this statistics book. I decided I would eliminate all mathematical
proofs and would present all calculations in clearly defined steps, thereby
reducing complex formulas. Students only “thought” they hated statistics,
I decided. What they really hated were the stories about bad statistics
teachers. What they hated was a teacher who taught to only 5% of the
class (those who got the ideas right away), which ironically was the 5%
who could have learned the material without a teacher. I decided that
students could actually love statistics or, at least, not mind statistics. For
example, people talk about how many home runs a player has hit, who is
second on such a list, how many marriages someone has had, how many
children a couple have, how many grandchildren they have, and many
more statistics of everyday life that actually enhance our appreciation of
life. Furthermore, even if some of my students never run a statistical test
after taking the course, those students and their families will always be
consumers of statistics. They will buy cars, houses, stocks, and
prescription drugs, and they will make all kinds of other decisions that
have been based on someone using or misusing statistics. Thus, I tell my
students each semester that I want them to be able to evaluate the
statistical decisions of other people. I want them to use statistical
principles to make informed decisions throughout their lives. However, I
am not naïve. I added and maintained a section in the book noting that
sometimes in life we need to make decisions based on our intuition or
what is in our hearts, and we cannot rely on statistics. Unfortunately, it is
now truer than ever that people deceive, propagandize, and lie with
statistics or even deny statistical methods. I recently read something from
a political pundit who disparagingly wrote, “Some people are data driven.”
I admit that good hypotheses and theories are valuable, but what else
except data would drive the support or rejection of an idea? And finally, I
have had the wonderful opportunity to improve my book again with a
fourth edition, and I have relished this work as well. I have now taught
statistics for 39 years, and I still look forward to my first day in class and
every subsequent day. I love making the complex simple. I love seeing
students finally understand statistical reasoning and seeing those
students apply those ideas to their lives.

What’s New in the Fourth Edition

Each and every paragraph has been reviewed for timeliness and
accuracy, and there are new entries and updated studies throughout. In
addition to practice problems, every chapter now has a set of test
questions to aid students and professors alike. In Chapter 1, the “nocebo
effect” (expecting bad things to happen) has been added to the placebo
effect discussion. The story of Nobel Prize winner Kary Mullis’s difficulties
in publishing his Nobel Prize-winning idea and the story of the
proliferation of predatory journals have also been added. Additional
examples for rounding numbers and determining percentages also
appear in Chapter 1. Chapter 5 now has a “Fun With Probabilities”
section with two provocative examples: one about determining the
probability of the sex of children and the other about the classic and often
highly annoying Monty Hall game. The section on linear regression in
Chapter 6 has been updated with a warning about the interpretation of
standardized beta coefficients and a possible solution to that problem.
The example for Spearman’s correlation has been updated with my
personality disorder research about world dictators. Chapter 15
discusses two additional nonparametric tests: the Mann–Whitney U test
for two independent groups and the Wilcoxon test for two dependent
groups. Chapter 16 contains an interesting new section on the nature of
“big data” and its four Vs: volume, velocity, variety, and veracity.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I thank my undergraduate students over the years for their curiosity and
their many questions, which have helped shape this book. I also thank
the many graduate students who have also helped me revise and correct
its various editions, particularly Lee Overmann and Jim Hicks for their
help on the third edition and Victoria Rowe and Tara Dieringer for their
help on the fourth edition.

SAGE and I also thank the following reviewers for their contributions to
this edition: Derrick Michael Bryan, Department of Sociology, Morehouse
College; Martin Campbell, Department of Psychology and Neuroscience,
University of St. Andrews; Abby Coats, Department of Psychology,
Westminster College; Lynn DeSpain, School of Professional Studies,
Regis University; and Andrew Zekeri, Department of Psychology and
Sociology, Tuskegee University.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Frederick L. Coolidge
received his B.A., M.A., and Ph.D. in psychology at the University of
Florida. He completed a 2-year postdoctoral fellowship in clinical
neuropsychology at Shands Teaching Hospital in Gainesville, Florida. He
has been awarded three Fulbright Fellowships to India (1987, 1992, and
2005). He has also received three teaching awards at the University of
Colorado, Colorado Springs (UCCS; 1984, 1987, and 1992), including
the lifetime title of University of Colorado Presidential Teaching Scholar.
He has received two faculty excellence in research awards at the
University of Colorado (2005 and 2007). In 2015, he served as a Senior
Visiting Scholar at the University of Oxford, Keble College. He also co-
founded the UCCS Center for Cognitive Archaeology and serves as its
co-director.

Professor Coolidge conducts research in cognitive archaeology,

evolutionary psychology, behavior genetics, and lifespan personality and
neuropsychological assessment. He has published this work in Behavior
Genetics, Developmental Neuropsychology, Journal of Personality
Disorders, Journal of Clinical Geropsychology, Current Anthropology,
Cambridge Archaeological Journal, Journal of Human Evolution, Journal
of Anthropological Research, and other journals. His enhanced working
memory theory (with archaeologist Thomas Wynn) about the evolution of
modern thinking was a featured article in the journal Science in 2010.

Professor Coolidge’s hobbies include reading, traveling, collecting (like

Sigmund Freud), bicycling, playing music, camping with his brother on
deserted islands in the Bahamas, husbanding, gardening, and
grandfathering.

Other books by Professor Frederick L. Coolidge

Evolutionary Neuropsychology (2020)

Squeezing Minds from Stones (2019)

The Rise of Homo sapiens: The Evolution of Modern Thinking (2018)

Cognitive Models in Palaeolithic Archaeology (2016)

Denken wie ein Neandertaler (German edition; 2013)

How to Think Like a Neandertal (2012)

Cognitive Archaeology and Human Evolution (2009)

Dream Interpretation as a Psychotherapeutic Technique (2006)

Personality Disorders and Older Adults (2006)

Memory Consolidation as a Function of Sleep and the Circadian Rhythm

(1974/2018)
1 A GENTLE INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER 1 GOALS

Understand the general purposes of statistics

Understand the various roles of a statistician

Learn the differences and similarities between descriptive statistics

and inferential statistics

Understand how the discipline of statistics allows the creation of

principled arguments

Review eight essential questions of any survey or study

Understand the differences between experimental control and

statistical control

Develop an appreciation for good and bad experimental designs

Learn four common types of measurement scales

Recognize and use common statistical symbols

The words “DON’T PANIC” appear on the cover of the book The
Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Perhaps it may be appropriate for some
of you to invoke these words as you embark on a course in statistics.
However, be assured that this course and materials are prepared with a
different philosophy in mind, which is that statistics should help you
understand the world around you and help you make better informed
decisions. Unfortunately, statistics may be legendary for driving sane
people mad or, less dramatically, causing undue anxiety in the hearts of
countless college students. However, statistics is simply the science of
the organization and conceptual understanding of groups of numbers and
making decisions from them. By converting our world to numbers,
statistics helps us understand our world in a quick and efficient way. It
also helps us make conceptual sense so that we might be able to
communicate this information about our world to others. More important,
just as in the practice of logic, statistics allows us to make arguments
based on established and rational principles; thus, it can promote wise
and informed decision making. Like any other scientific discipline,
statistics also has its own language, and it will be important for you to
learn many new terms and symbols and to see how some common
words that you already know may have very different meanings in a
statistical context.

HOW MUCH MATH DO I NEED TO DO

STATISTICS?
Can you add, subtract, multiply, and divide with the help of a calculator?
If you answered yes (even if you are slow at the calculations), then you
can handle statistics. If you answered no, then you should brush up on
your basic math and simple algebra skills. Statistics is not really about
math. In fact, some mathematicians secretly revel in the fact that their
science may have little relevance to the real world. The science of
statistics, on the other hand, is actually based on decision-making
processes, and so statistics must make conceptual sense. Most of the
statistical procedures presented in this course can also be performed
using specially designed computer software programs such as SPSS
(www.spss.com). Each chapter in this book has specific SPSS
instructions to perform the analyses in that chapter. Programs such as
SPSS make it easy to perform statistical calculations, and they do so with
blazing speed. However, these programs provide very little or no
explanation for the subsequent output, and that is at least one of the
purposes of this course.

THE GENERAL PURPOSE OF STATISTICS:

UNDERSTANDING THE WORLD
A group of numbers in mathematics is called a set, but in statistics this
group is more frequently called data (a single number is called a datum).
Typically, the numbers themselves represent scores on some test, or
they might represent the number of people who show up at some event.
It is the purpose of statistics to take all these numbers or data and
present them in a more efficient way. An even more important use of
statistics, contrary to some people’s beliefs, is to present these data in a
more comprehensible way. People who obfuscate (i.e., bewilder or
confuse) with statistics are not really representative of the typical and
ethical statistician. This course will also provide you with some protection
against the attempts of some people and their statisticians who try to
convince you that a product works when it really does not or that a
product is superior to another product when it really is not.

Another Purpose of Statistics: Making an

Argument or a Decision
People often use statistics to support their opinions. People concerned
with reducing the incidence of lung cancer use statistics to argue that
cigarette smoking increases the likelihood of lung cancer. Car and truck
makers use statistics to show the reliability of their cars and trucks. It has
been said that being a statistician is like being an honest lawyer. One can
use statistics to sell a product, advance an argument, support an opinion,
elect a candidate, improve societal conditions, and so on. Because
clearly presented statistical arguments can be so powerful—say,
compared with someone else’s simple unsupported opinion—the science
of statistics can become a very important component of societal change.

WHAT IS A STATISTICIAN?
Although many of you would probably rather sit on a tack than become a
statistician, imagine combining the best aspects of the careers of a
curious detective, an honest attorney, and a good storyteller. Well, that is
often the job of a statistician, according to contemporary statistician
Robert P. Abelson (1928–2005; see Abelson, 1995). Let us examine the
critical elements of these roles in detail.
http://www.clipart.com/en/close-up?o=3982329

Source: Clipart.com.

One Role: The Curious Detective

The curious detective knows a crime has been committed and examines
clues or evidence at the scene of the crime. Based on this evidence, the
detective develops a suspicion about a suspect who may have committed
the crime. In a parallel way, a statistician develops suspicions about
suspects or causative agents such as which product is best, what causes
Alzheimer’s disease, and how music may or may not affect purchasing
behavior. In the case of Alzheimer’s disease, the patients’ lives are
quantified into numbers (data). The data become the statistician’s clues
or evidence, and the experimental design (how the data were collected)
is the crime scene. As you already know, evidence without a crime scene
is virtually useless, and equally useless are data without knowing how
they were collected. Health professionals who can analyze these data
statistically can subsequently make decisions about causative agents
(e.g., does aluminum in food products cause Alzheimer’s disease?) and
choose appropriate interventions and treatments.

A good detective is also a skeptic. When other detectives initially share

their suspicions about a suspect, good detectives typically reserve
judgment until they have reviewed the evidence and observed the scene
of the crime. Statisticians are similar in that they are not swayed by
popular opinion. They should not be swayed by potential profits or losses.
Statisticians examine the data and experimental design and develop their
own hypotheses (educated guesses) about the effectiveness or lack of
effectiveness of some procedure or product. Statisticians also have the
full capability of developing their own research designs (based on
established procedures) and testing their own hypotheses. Ethical
statisticians are clearly a majority. It is unusual to find cases of clear
fraud in the world of statistics, although they sometimes occur. More
often, statisticians are like regular people; they can sometimes be
unconsciously swayed by fame, money, loyalties, and prior beliefs.
Therefore, it is important to thoroughly learn the fundamental statistical
principles in this course. As noted earlier, even if you do not become a
producer of statistics, you and your family, friends, and relatives will
always be consumers of statistics (e.g., when you purchase any product
or prescription drug); thus, it is important to understand how statistics are
created and how they may be manipulated intentionally, unintentionally,
or fraudulently. There is the cliché that if something seems too good to be
true, then it might not be true. This cliché also holds in the world of
statistics. Interestingly, however, it might not be the resulting statistics
that make something appear too good to be true, but rather it may be
how the statistics were gathered, also known as the experimental design.
This course will present both the principles of statistics and their
accompanying experimental designs. And as you will soon learn, the
power of the experimental design is greater than the power of the
statistical analysis.

http://www.istockphoto.com/stock-photo-3118029-justice-scale-and-
gavel.php

Another Role: The Honest Attorney

An honest attorney takes the facts of a case and creates a legal
argument before a judge and jury. The attorney becomes an advocate for
a particular position or a most likely scenario. Frequently, the facts might
not form a coherent whole or the facts may have alternative explanations.
Statisticians are similar in that they examine data and try to come up with
a reasonable or likely explanation for why the data occurred. Ideally,
statisticians are not passive people but rather active theoreticians (i.e.,
scientists). Scientists are curious. They have an idea about the nature of
life or reality. They wonder about relationships among variables, for
example, what causes a particular disease, why people buy this brand as
opposed to that brand, and whether a product is helpful or harmful.
These hypotheses are tested through experiments or surveys. The
results of an experiment or survey are quantified (turned into numbers).
Statisticians then become attorneys when they honestly determine
whether they feel the data support their original suspicions or
hypotheses. If the data do support the original hypothesis, then
statisticians argue their case (study) on behalf of their hypothesis before
a judge (journal editor, administrator, etc.). In situations where
statisticians wish to publish the results of their findings, they select an
appropriate journal and send the article and a letter of justification to the
editor of the journal. The journal editor then sends the article to experts in
that field of study (also known as peer reviewers). The reviewers suggest
changes or modifications if necessary. They are also often asked to
decide whether the study is worthy of publication. If the researcher has
convinced the editor and the peer reviewers that this hypothesis is the
most likely explanation for the data, then the study may be published.
The time between submission and the actual publication of the article will
typically take between 6 months and 2 years, and this time period is
known as publication lag.

There are, of course, unscrupulous or naive attorneys, and sadly too, as

noted earlier, there are also unscrupulous or naive statisticians. These
types either consciously or unconsciously force the facts or data to fit
their hypothesis. In the worst cases, they may ignore other facts not
flattering to their case or may even make up their data. In science,
although there are a few outright cases of fraud, it is more often that we
see data forced into a particular interpretation because of a strong prior
belief. In these cases, the role of a skeptical detective comes into play.
We may ask ourselves, are these data too good to be true? Are there
alternative explanations? Fortunately, in science—and this is where we
so strongly differ from a courtroom—our hypothesis will not be decided
by one simple study. It is said that we do not “prove” the truth or falsity of
any hypothesis. It takes a series of studies, called replication, to show
the usefulness of a hypothesis. A series of studies that fails to support a
hypothesis will have the effect of making the hypothesis fall into disuse.
There was an old psychological theory that body type (fat, skinny, or
muscular) was associated with specific personality traits (happy, anxious,
or assertive), but a vast series of studies found very little support for the
original hypothesis. The hypothesis was not disproven in any absolute
sense, but it fell into disuse among scientists and in their scientific
journals. Ironically, this did not “kill” the scientifically discredited body-
type theory given that it still lives in popular but unscientific monthly
magazines.

A Final Role: A Good Storyteller

Source: The Storyteller by Mats Rehnman, © 1992. Used with the kind permission of
the artist. Find out more about the fine art of storytelling by visiting the artist at
www.Facebook.com/mats.rehnman.

Storytelling is an art. When we love or hate a book or a movie, we are

frequently responding to how well the story was told. I once read a story
about the making of steel. Now, steelmaking is not high (or even
medium) on my list of interesting topics, but the writer unwound such an
interesting and dramatic story that my attention was completely riveted.
By parallel, it is not enough for a statistician to be a curious detective and
an honest attorney. He or she must also be a good storyteller. A
statistician’s hypothesis may be the real one, but the statistician must
state his or her case clearly and in a convincing style. Thus, a successful
statistician must be able to articulate what was found in an experiment,
why this finding is important and to whom, and what the experiment may
mean for the future of the human race (okay, I may be exaggerating on
this latter point). Articulation (good storytelling) may be one of the most
critical aspects of being a good statistician and scientist. In fact, good
storytelling may be one of the most important roles in the history of
humankind (see Arsuaga, 2002, and Sugiyama, 2001).

There are many examples of good storytelling throughout science. The

origin of the universe makes a very fascinating story. Currently, there are
at least two somewhat rival theories (theories are bigger and grander
than hypotheses, but essentially theories, at their hearts, are no more
than educated guesses); in one story a Supreme Being created the
universe from nothingness in 6 days, and in the other story, the big bang,
the universe started as a singular point that exploded to create the
universe. Note that each theory has a fascinating story associated with it.
One problem with both stories is that we are trying to explain how
something came from nothing, which is a logical contradiction. It has
been suggested that the object of a myth is to provide some logical
explanation for overcoming a contradiction; however, this may be an
impossible task when the contradiction is real. Still, both of these theories
remain very popular among laypeople and scientists alike, in part
because they make interesting, provocative, and fascinating stories.

Science is replete with interesting stories. Even the reproductive behavior

of Planaria or the making of steel can be told in an interesting and
convincing manner (i.e., any topic has the potential to make a good
story). Does our current society reward someone who tells a good story?
Of course! For example, who is reportedly the richest woman in England?
It is said to be J. K. Rowling, the person who told the world the story of a
boy, Harry Potter, who went off to wizardry school.

LIBERAL AND CONSERVATIVE

STATISTICIANS
As we proceed with this course in statistics, you may come to realize that
there is considerable leeway in the way data are investigated (called the
experimental methodology or experimental design) and in the way data
are tabulated and reported (called statistical analyses). There appear to
be two camps: the liberals and the conservatives. Just as in politics,
neither position is entirely correct given that both philosophies have their
advantages and disadvantages.

Scientists as a whole are generally conservative, and because

statisticians are scientists, they too are conservative as a general rule.
Conservative statisticians stick with the tried and true. They prefer
conventional rules and regulations. They design experiments in
traditional ways, and they interpret and report their interpretations in the
same conventional fashion. This position is not as stodgy as it may first
appear to be. The conservative position has the advantage of being more
readily accepted by the scientific community (including journal editors
and peer reviewers). If one sticks to the rules and accepted statistical
conventions and one argues successfully according to these same rules
and conventions, then there is typically a much greater likelihood that the
findings will be accepted and published and will receive attention from the
scientific community. Conservative statisticians are very careful in their
interpretation of their data. They guard against chance playing a role in
their findings by rejecting any findings or treatment effects that are small
in nature. Their findings must be very clear, or their treatment effect (e.g.,
from a new drug) must be very large, for them to conclude that their data
are real, and consequently, there is a very low probability that pure
chance could account for their findings.

The disadvantages of the conservative statistical position are that new

investigative research methods, creative statistical analyses, and radical
conclusions are avoided. For example, in the real world, sometimes new
drug treatments are somewhat effective but not on everyone, or the new
drug treatment may work on nearly everyone, but the improvement is
modest or marginal. By always guarding so strongly against chance,
conservative statisticians frequently end up in the position of “throwing
out the baby with the bathwater.” They may end up concluding that their
findings are simply due to chance when in reality something is actually
happening in the data that is not due to chance.

Liberal statisticians are in a freer position. They may apply exciting new
methods to investigate a hypothesis and apply new methods of
statistically analyzing their data. Liberal statisticians are not afraid to flout
the accepted scientific statistical conventions. The drawback to this
position is that scientists, as a whole, are like people in general. Many of
us initially tend to fear new ways of doing things. Thus, liberal
statisticians may have difficulty in getting their results published in
standard scientific journals. They will often be criticized on the sole
grounds of investigating something in a different way and not for their
actual results or conclusions. In addition, there are other real dangers
from being statistical liberals. Inherent in this position is that they are
more willing than conservative statisticians to view small improvements
as real treatment effects. In this way, liberal statisticians may be more
likely to discover a new and effective treatment. However, the danger is
that they are more likely to call a chance finding a real finding. If
scientists are too hasty or too readily jump to conclusions, then the
consequences of their actions can be deadly or even worse. What can be
worse than deadly? Well, consider a tranquilizer called thalidomide
during the 1960s. Although there were no consequences for men, more
than 10,000 babies were born to women who took thalidomide during
pregnancy, and the babies were born alive but without hands or feet.
Thus, scientific liberalism has its advantages (new, innovative, or
creative) and its disadvantages (it may be perceived as scary, flashy, or
bizarre or have results that are deadly or even worse). Neither position is
a completely comfortable one for statisticians. This book will teach you
the conservative rules and conventions. It will also encourage you to
think of alternative ways of exploring your data. But remember, as in life,
no position is a position, and any position involves consequences.

DESCRIPTIVE AND INFERENTIAL

STATISTICS
The most crucial aspect of applying statistics consists of analyzing the
data in such a way as to obtain a more efficient and comprehensive
summary of the overall results. To achieve these goals, statistics is
divided into two areas: descriptive and inferential statistics. At the outset,
do not worry about the distinction between them too much; the areas they
cover overlap, and descriptive statistics may be viewed as building blocks
for the more complicated inferential statistics.

Descriptive statistics is historically the older of these two areas. It

involves measuring data using graphs, tables, and basic descriptions of
numbers such as averages and means. These universally accepted
descriptions of numbers are called parameters, and the most popular
and important of the parameters are the mean and standard deviation
(which we will discuss in detail in Chapter 3).

Inferential statistics is a relatively newer area that involves making

guesses (inferences) about a large group of data (called the population)
from a smaller group of data (called the sample). The population is
defined as the entire collection or set of objects, people, or events that
we are interested in studying. Interestingly, statisticians rarely deal with
the population because, typically, the number of objects that meet the
criterion for being in the population is too large (e.g., taxpayers in the
United States), it is financially unfeasible to measure such a group,
and/or we wish to apply the results to people who are not yet in the
population but will be in the future. Thus, statisticians use a sample
drawn from the population. For our inferences about our sample to be
representative of the population, statisticians have two suggestions. First,
the sample should be randomly drawn from the population. The concept
of a random sample means that every datum or person in the population
has an equal chance of being chosen for the sample. Second, the
sample should be large relative to the population. We will see later that
the latter suggestion for sample size will change depending on whether
we are conducting survey research or controlled experiments.

Statistical studies are often reported as being based on stratified

samples. A stratified sample means that objects are included in the
sample in proportion to their frequency in the subgroups that make up the
population. For example, if it was reported that a study was conducted on
a religious beliefs stratified sample of the U.S. population, then the ratios
of religious beliefs in the sample would be 47% Protestant, 23% no
religious beliefs (agnostic, atheist, or none), 21% Catholic, 6% non-
Christian (Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, Buddhist), and 3% other Christian
churches (Mormon or Jehovah’s Witness). Again, large samples, random
samples, and stratified samples help us make inferences that are more
than likely to be representative of the population that we are studying.

EXPERIMENTS ARE DESIGNED TO TEST

THEORIES AND HYPOTHESES
A theory can be considered a group of general propositions that attempts
to explain some phenomenon. Typically, theories are also grand; that is,
they tend to account for something major or important such as theories of
supply and demand, how children acquire language, or how the universe
began. A good theory should provoke people to think. A good theory
should also be able to generate testable propositions. These propositions
are actually guesses about the way things should be if the theory is
correct. Hypotheses are specifically stated propositions created from and
consistent with the theory that are then tested through experimental
research. Theories whose specific hypotheses are frequently supported
by research tend to be regarded as useful. Theories whose hypotheses
fail to receive support tend to be ignored. It is important to remember that
theories and hypotheses are never really proven or disproved in any
absolute sense. They either are supported or fail to receive support from
research. In the real world, it is also frequently the case that some
theories and hypotheses receive mixed results. Sometimes research
findings support the propositions, and other experiments fail to support
them. Scientists and statisticians tend to have critical attitudes about
theories and hypotheses because, as noted earlier, the repercussions in
science for a bad theory can be deadly or even worse. Thus, statisticians
like well-designed and well-thought-out research, such that the findings
and conclusions are clear, compelling, and unambiguous.

ODDBALL THEORIES
Science is not simply a collection of rigid rules. Scientific knowledge does
not always advance smoothly but rather typically moves along in
sputters, stops and starts, dead ends, and controversy. Carl Sagan, the
late astronomer, said that science requires the mating of two
contradictions: a willingness to think about new, unique, strange, or even
bizarre explanations coupled with rigorous skepticism and hard evidence.
If scientists published only exactly what they thought they would find, new
discoveries would be exceedingly rare. Thus, scientists must be willing to
take risks and dare to be wrong. The physicist Wolfgang Pauli wrote that
being “not even wrong” is even worse than being wrong because that
would imply that one’s theory is not even worth contradiction or dispute.
The Nobel Prize in Medicine was awarded to an American neurologist,
Stanley Prusiner, who proposed that infectious particles called prions do
not contain any genes or genetic material yet reproduce and cause “mad
cow disease” (a dementia-like disease caused by eating infected meat).
For years, Prusiner’s ideas were considered revolutionary or even
heretical; however, most research now supports his more than two
decades of experimental work. His “oddball” theory was provocative,
generated many testable hypotheses, and was supported by his own
rigorous testing and skepticism, and scientific knowledge has benefited
greatly from his theory. However, remember that there is no shortage of
oddballish people creating oddball theories. A good theory is not only
interesting and provocative but also must be supported by testable
hypotheses and solid evidence.

BAD SCIENCE AND MYTHS

In my Sunday newspaper, I once saw a question in a fitness column
concerning adhesive strips that go across the bridge of one’s nose.
These same strips seem to be popular among professional athletes. “Do
they work?” asked the letter writer. The magazine’s expert says they
reduce airflow resistance “as much as 30%.” However, because the
“expert” says it is true, does that make it true? Of course not!
Nevertheless, we are bombarded daily by a plethora of statistics such as
that one in four college-age women have been raped, marriage reduces
drug abuse, classical music boosts IQ, people use only 10% of their
brains, and left-handers die younger than right-handers. We even pass
down many myths as truths such as that Eskimos have 30 words for
snow and one should change the oil in one’s car every 3,000 miles. The
Internet has even sped up the process of passing on this information.
Some of these common myths are also called “urban legends.” Of
course, anyone can post any belief or idea on the Internet, and the mere
posting or retelling of a “story” does not make it true. For example,
Eskimos apparently have just as many descriptions of snow as other
people. Because most of us have been raised to tell the truth, we
typically do not challenge the facts or statistics fed to us daily. However,
let us be realistic. Many studies are poorly designed, statistics can be
misused or manipulated, and many people in our society are not
interested in the truth but rather are interested in money and power (that
brings more money). The magazine Consumer Reports empirically
investigated the myth of the 3,000-mile oil change and consistently found
no benefits compared with much longer intervals. Interestingly, no
reputable scientist ever published the idea that people use only 10% of
their brains. If it were true, I would very much hope that my 10% are the
ones involved in heart rate, respiration, and blood pressure. A
“motivational speaker” probably created this myth, but there’s not a shred
of scientific evidence for its truthfulness. It may have persisted because
the consequences of the belief (that humans are capable of doing more
than they do) are not harmful. But now, let us return to the “nose strips.”

Ultimately, why did someone create nose strips? Probably to make

money. Helping people breathe right was perhaps, if we are very lucky,
secondary. In fact, it is easy to imagine that many products in the market
are not even remotely designed to do what they claim. Their sole purpose
is to make money. However, let us give the nose strip creator the benefit
of the doubt. Why should we use nose strips? Well, the nose strip people
say that they have scientific evidence that nose strips work, and they
present the following “facts.” Breathing takes 10% of our total energy,
and their nose strips reduce air resistance by up to 30%. With regard to
this first fact, I think it would be fair to know how total energy was
measured. Isn’t it rather difficult to come up with a single measure of how
energy is expended? And even if we could come up with an acceptable
measure, did they measure this 10% expenditure when a person was
exercising or at rest? If the person was exercising (because I assume
that’s when we’d want to use nose strips), how did they measure the total
energy expended when the person was running around? Did they
remotely or telemetrically send the energy expenditure information? I am
not sure that this is even possible. It’s easier for me to imagine the
person at rest when he or she was measured for energy expenditure.
Therefore, at-rest measures might not be appropriate for someone who is
actually running about. Furthermore, who was the person tested? What
was that person’s age? Will we be able to generalize to the average
person? Is it fair to generalize from just one test subject to all people?
Was the participant paid? Some people will say anything for money. An
even worse scenario is that some people will even deceive themselves
about how well something works if they are paid enough money.
(Curiously, Leon Festinger [1919–1989], a social psychologist, found that
some people will deceive themselves and act positively about something
if they are paid too little money.)

The same criticism appears to hold for the second “fact.” How did the
nose strip people ever measure this 30% air resistance reduction? Was
that 30% over a period of time? Was it a mean score for a large number
of participants? Was it a single score? Who did the testing? Was it an
independent testing group, or did the nose strip people conduct the
research? If the nose strip people did the testing, I think they may have
been consciously or unconsciously biased in favor of the product.
A second reason the nose strip people say that we should buy their
product is that Jerry Rice, the former great pro football player, used to
wear them. Now, we are tempted to use nose strips because of an expert
opinion and the prestige associated with that expert. But does that mean
they really work? Of course not, but we rarely challenge the opinion of an
“expert.” Many other factors are operating here such as the powerful
process of people identifying with the rich and famous. Some people
think that if Jerry Rice used them, then they will be as great as he was if
they use them. We can see as we closely examine our motivations that
many are not based on rational or logical reasoning. They are based,
however, on unconscious and powerful forces that cause us to believe,
trust, imitate, and follow others, particularly people who we perceive as
having more power or status than we have. This willingness to believe on
sheer faith that a product or technique works has been called the placebo
effect (to be discussed shortly).

In summary, when we closely examine many of our attitudes, beliefs,

facts, and “studies,” we find that they often lack any scientific validity. And
if we blindly accept facts, figures, cures, and snake oil, we are putting
ourselves in a very dangerous position. We may make useless changes
in our lives, costly changes for no good reason, or even dangerous
changes. We may also unnecessarily subject ourselves to needless
stress and worry.

EIGHT ESSENTIAL QUESTIONS OF ANY

SURVEY OR STUDY

1. Who Was Surveyed or Studied?

Remember, most of the time, we hope that we can use the product or
would benefit from a new treatment or technique. A majority of studies
still use only men. Would we be able to generalize to women if only men
are studied? Would we be able to generalize to children if only adults are
studied? Would we be able to generalize to people if only animals are
studied? Will the product be safe for people if we do not use animals in
our research? If our moral values prevent us from using animals in
research, then what other methods are available to ensure the safety of a
product?

For a sample to be representative of the larger group (the population), it

should be randomly chosen. Did the study in question use random
sampling? Random sampling implies that everyone in the population has
an equal chance to be in the sample. If we telephone a random sample of
voters in our county, is that a random sample? No, because not everyone
has a telephone and not everyone has an equal chance to answer the
phone if we call at 11 a.m. In reality, random sampling is desirable but is
usually impossible or unfeasible. However, scientists recognize that
conducting a perfect study without sampling issues is also impossible or
unfeasible. In recognition of this restraint, published studies will invariably
include a section devoted to the studies’ limitations.

2. Why Did the People Participate in the Study?

Did the people volunteer or were they paid? If they were paid, and paid a
lot, they might skew the results in favor of the experimenter’s hypothesis.
Even if they were not paid, participants have been known to
unconsciously bias an experiment in the experimenter’s favor. Why?
Because sometimes we are just fond of some people—we’d like to help
them out or we’d be embarrassed if they failed in front of us. We might
not wish to share their humiliation. Or it is easy to imagine some
participants who would like to see the experimenter fail because they
enjoy other people’s suffering and humiliation. Ultimately, it is in the
experiment’s best interest if the experimenter’s hypothesis is kept a
secret from the participants. Furthermore, the experimenter should not
know who received the experimental treatment, so that the experimenter
isn’t biased when he or she is assessing the results of the experimental
treatment or product being tested. If the experimenter doesn’t know who
was in what group (but someone important does) and the participants do
not know what is being tested, the study is said to be a double-blind
experiment.

3. Was There a Control Group, and Did the

Control Group Receive a Placebo?
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chagrin and sorrow by which her heart was consumed. Then
Clemence kissed the flowers, and let her tears fall on them, and
threw them to her lover, and her father appeared, and Lautrec
gathered up the flowers, and hastily withdrew. In obedience to the
injunctions of his mistress, he departed from Toulouse for the French
king’s court; but before he had proceeded far on his journey, he
heard that the English were marching against the city; and he
returned when the inhabitants were flying before the enemy, and
abandoning the ramparts, and leaving them defenceless: and only
one old man resisted and valiantly maintained his ground. Then
Lautrec fled to his assistance, and discovered him to be Alphonso,
the father of Clemence: and at the moment when a fatal stroke was
aimed at the old man, he rushed forward and received the mortal
wound himself, and died in Alphonso’s arms, and gave him the
flowers he received from Clemence, and conjured him to deliver
them to his daughter, and to console her under the distress his fate
would bring upon her. And Alphonso relented, and in great sorrow
carried the flowers to Clemence, and related the untimely death of
Lautrec; and her afflictions were too heavy for her to bear, and she
fell a victim to despair and anguish, and followed her lover to the
grave. But in remembrance of their sad story, she bequeathed her
whole property to the city of Toulouse for the celebration of annual
games, at which, prizes of golden flowers, like those she had given
to Lautrec, were to be distributed to the skilful troubadours who
should compose the best poem, upon the occasion. This is the
history of the gallant Lautrec and the fair Clemence, in the poetical
romance.
But according to Pierre Caseneuve, the author of an “Inquiry into
the Origin of the Floral Games at Toulouse,” there is strong reason to
doubt whether such a person as Clemence ever existed. Among the
archives of the Hôtel de Ville are several chronicles of the floral
games, the oldest of which states, that in the year 1324, seven of
the principal inhabitants of Toulouse, desirous to promote the fame
and prosperity of the city, resolved to establish an annual festival
there, for the cultivation of the Provençal poetry, a spirit of piety, and
suavity of manners. They therefore proposed that all persons skilled
in Provençal poetry, should be invited to assemble at Toulouse every
year in the beginning of May, to recite their compositions, and that a
violet of gold should be given to him whose verses the judges should
determine the most worthy; and a circular letter in the Provençal
poetry was dispersed over the province of Languedoc, inviting
competitors to assemble in the beginning of May the following year,
to celebrate this festival.
The poetical compositions were not to be confined to the lays of
lovers reciting their passion, and the fame of their mistresses; but
the honour of God, and glorifying his name, was to be their first
object. It was wished that poetry should conduce to the happiness
of mankind, and by furnishing them a source of innocent and
laudable amusement, make time pass pleasantly, repress the unjust
sallies of anger, and dissipate the dark vapours of sadness. For these
reasons it was termed, by the institutors, the “Gay Science.”
In consequence of this invitation, a large concourse of
competitors resorted to Toulouse; and in May, 1325, the first festival
of the floral games was celebrated. Verses were recited by the
candidates before a numerous assembly. The seven persons with
whom the meeting originated, presided under the title of the
chancellor of the “Gay Science,” and his six assessors, and there also
sat with them, the capitouls or chief magistrates of the town as
judges; and there was a great assemblage of knights, of gentlemen,
and of ladies. The prize was given to the candidate whose verses
were determined by the majority of the judges to be the most
worthy.
The “floral games” of Toulouse continued to be celebrated in like
manner, at the sole expense of the institutors, till the magistrates
seeing the advantage they were of to the town, by the vast
concourse of people brought thither, and considering that their
continuance must be precarious while they depended upon the
ability and disposition of a few individuals for their support, resolved
to convert the institution into a public concern; and, with the
concurrence of the principal inhabitants, it was determined that the
expense should in future be defrayed by the city, that to the original
prize two others should be added, a silver eglantine, and a silver
marigold; and that occasional ones might be distributed at the
option of the judges to very young poets, as stimulants to them to
aim at obtaining the principal prizes.
After about thirty years it was judged expedient to appoint a
committee, who should draw up such a code of statutes as might
include every possible case that could occur, and these statutes were
laid before the judges for their approbation.
Among these decrees the principal were, that no prize could be
given to a heretic, a schismatic, or an excommunicated person; that
whoever was a candidate for any of the prizes, should take a solemn
oath that the poetry was his own composition, without the least
assistance from any other person; that no woman should be
admitted to the competition, unless her talents in composing verses
were so celebrated as to leave no doubt of her being capable of
writing the poetry offered:—that no one who gained a prize was
allowed to be a candidate again till after a lapse of three years,
though he was expected in the intervening years to compose verses
for the games, and recite them; and that if any or all the prizes
remained undisposed of, from no verses being produced that were
judged worthy of them, the prizes were to remain over to the next
year, then to be given away in addition to the regular prizes of the
year.
Under these and other regulations the “floral games” became
celebrated throughout Europe; and within fifty years from their first
institution they were the resort of all persons of distinction. In 1388,
the reigning king of Arragon sent ambassadors to Charles the Sixth
of France, with great pomp and solemnity, requesting that some of
the poets of the “floral games” at Toulouse might be permitted to
come to the court, and assist in establishing similar games there;
promising that, when they had fulfilled their mission, they should
receive rewards equal to their merits, and consistent with his royal
munificence.
This account of the institution of the “floral games” is from the
oldest registers relative to them; wherein there is no mention made
of the lady Clemence Isaure till 1513, nearly two hundred years after
their institution; and it is well known that the statue of the lady
Clemence in the consistory, was not put up till the year 1557. In that
year it had been proposed in the college of the Gay Science to erect
a monument to her memory in the church of La Dorade, where she
was reputed to have been buried; but this idea was afterwards
changed for putting up her statue in the room where the “floral
games” were held. From that time the statue was always crowned
with flowers at the time of the celebration of the games, and a Latin
oration pronounced in honour of her. A satirical sonnet in the
Provençal language upon the idea of erecting either a monument or
a statue to a lady who never had any existence in the world, is
preserved in Pierre Caseneuve’s “Inquiry into the Origin of the Floral
Games.”
But by whomsoever the “floral games” of Toulouse were
instituted, it is remarkable, that the festival was constantly observed
for more than four centuries and a half without interruption. It did
not cease to be celebrated till the revolution. It was not, however,
continued entirely according to the original institution, since for a
considerable time the use of the Provençal language, in the poetry
for the prizes, had been abandoned, and the French substituted for
it. At what period this change took place does not seem to be well
ascertained. The number of prizes, too, was increased to five, the
principal of which was still the golden violet; but instead of one
eglantine, and one marigold of silver, two of each were given. The
violet was appropriated to the best ode; the others were for a piece
in heroic poetry, for one in pastoral poetry, for a satirical piece, and
for a sonnet, a madrigal, a song, or some other minor effusion.
Three of the deputies to the parliament had for some time
presided at these games, instead of the chancellor of the Gay
Science with his six assessors; and with them were associated the
capitouls, or chief magistrates of the town. All the other magistrates,
and the whole body of the parliament, attended in their robes of
office, with the principal gentlemen of the town, and a brilliant
assemblage of ladies in full dress. These were ranged round the
room in seats raised like an amphitheatre, and the students of the
university sat on benches in the centre. The room was ornamented
with festoons of flowers and laurel, and the statue of Clemence
Isaure was crowned with them. After the oration in honour of her
was pronounced, the judges, having previously consulted together in
private, and assigned the prizes to the pieces which they thought
most worthy of them, stood up, and, naming the poem to which one
was given, pronounced with an audible voice, “Let the author come
forward.” The author then presented himself; when his name was
declared, it was followed by a grand flourish of music. The same
ceremony was repeated as each piece was announced. The whole
concluded with each author publicly reading his poem.
Many of these prize poems are to be found in different
collections. Several prizes were in latter times adjudged to females,
without any strict investigation having been previously made into the
possibility of the pieces to which they were decreed being female
compositions. It was owing to having gained a silver eglantine at
one of these festivals that the celebrated Fabre d’Eglantine assumed
the latter part of his name. He was a Languedocian by birth, a native
of Limoux, a small town about four leagues from Toulouse.[152]

Without such encouragements to be poetical, as were annually

offered by the conductors of the “floral games” at Toulouse, our kind
feelings have been cultivated, and our literature is enriched by a
race of poets, whom we may venture to array against the united
armies of continental bards. It may be doubted whether a May prize
of Toulouse was ever awarded for sweeter verses, than Matt. Prior’s
on Chloe’s May flowers.
 The Garland.
The pride of every grove I chose
The violet sweet and lily fair,
The dappled pink, and blushing rose,
To deck my charming Chloe’s hair.
At morn the nymph vouchsaf’d to place
Upon her brow the various wreath;
The flowers less blooming than her face,
The scent less fragrant than her breath.
The flowers she wore along the day,
And every nymph and shepherd said,
That in her hair they looked more gay
Than glowing in their native bed.
Undrest at evening, when she found
Their odour lost, their colours past,
She changed her look, and on the ground
Her garland and her eye she cast.
The eye dropt sense distinct and clear,
As any muse’s tongue could speak,
When from its lid a pearly tear
Ran trickling down her beauteous cheek.
Dissembling what I knew too well,
“My love, my life,” said I, “explain
This change of humour; pr’ythee tell:
That falling tear—what does it mean?”
She sighed; she smil’d; and, to the flowers
Pointing, the lovely moralist said,
“See, friend, in some few fleeting hours
See yonder, what a change is made!
“Ah, me! the blooming pride of May,
And that of beauty are but one,
At morn both flourish bright and gay;
Both fade at evening, pale and gone.
“At dawn poor Stella danc’d and sung;
The amorous youth around her bowed,
At night her fatal knell was rung;
I saw and kissed her in her shroud.
“Such as she is, who died to-day;
Such I alas! may be to-morrow;
 Such I, alas! may be to-morrow;
Go, Damon, bid thy muse display
The justice of thy Chloe’s sorrow.”
Prior.
A beautiful ode by another of our poets graces the loveliness of
the season, and finally “points a moral” of sovereign virtue to all who
need the application, and will take it to heart.
 Spring.
Lo! where the rosy bosom’d hours,
Fair Venus’ train appear,
Disclose the long expected flowers,
And wake the purple year!
The attic warbler pours her throat,
Responsive to the cuckoo’s note,
The untaught harmony of spring:
While whispering pleasure as they fly,
Cool zephyrs through the clear blue sky
Their gathered fragrance fling.
Where’er the oak’s thick branches stretch
A broader, browner shade;
Where’er the rude and moss-grown beech
O’er-canopies the glade,
Beside some water’s rushy brink
With me the muse shall sit, and think
(At ease reclined in rustic state)
How vain the ardour of the crowd,
How low how little are the proud,
How indigent the great!
Still is the toiling hand of care;
The panting herds repose:
Yet hark, how through the peopled air
The busy murmur glows!
The insect youth are on the wing,
Eager to taste the honied spring,
And float amid the liquid noon:
Some lightly o’er the current skim,
Some slow, their gayly-gilded trim
Quick-glancing to the sun.
To Contemplation’s sober eye
Such is the race of man:
And they that creep and they that fly,
Shall end where they began.
Alike the busy and the gay
But flutter through life’s little day
In fortune’s varying colours drest.
Brushed by the hand of rough mischance;
Or chill’d by age, their airy dance
They leave in dust to rest.
 Methinks I hear in accents low
The sportive kind reply;
“Poor moralist! and what art thou?
A solitary fly!
Thy joys no glittering female meets,
No hive hast thou of hoarded sweets,
No painted plumage to display:
On hasty wings thy youth is flown;
Thy sun is set, thy spring is gone—
We frolic while ’tis May.”
Gay.
Then, too, a bard of the preceding centuries introduces “the
Shepherd’s Holiday,” the day we now memorialize, with nymphs
singing his own sweet verses in “floral games.”
Nymph 1.
Thus, thus begin, the yearly rites
Are due to Pan on these bright nights,
His morn now riseth, and invites
To sports, to dances, and delights:
All envious, and profane away,
This is the shepherd’s holiday.
Nymph 2.
Strew, strew, the glad and smiling ground,
With every flower, yet not confound
The primrose drop, the spring’s own spouse,
Bright daisies, and the lips-of-cows,
The garden-star, the queen of May,
The rose, to crown the holiday.
Nymph 3.
Drop drop your violets, change your hues,
Now red, now pale, as lovers use,
And in your death go out as well
As when you lived unto the smell:
That from your odour all may say,
This is the shepherd’s holiday.
Jonson.
 It is to be observed as a remarkable fact, that among the poets,
the warmest advocates and admirers of the popular sports and
pastimes in village retreats, uniformly invigorate and give keeping to
their pictures, by sparkling lights and harmonizing shadows of moral
truth.
But hark! the bagpipe summons on the green,
The jocund bagpipe, that awaketh sport;
The blithsome lasses, as the morning sheen,
Around the flower-crown’d Maypole quick resort;
The gods of pleasure here have fix’d their court.
Quick on the wing the flying moment seize,
Nor build up ample schemes, for life is short,
Short as the whisper of the passing breeze.

Gathering of May Dew.

This engraving represents certain lads and lasses of “auld
Reekie,” who are early gatherers of “May-dew,” in the act of dancing
to the piper’s “skirl.” From a slight sketch accompanying the
communication, Mr. George Cruikshank’s pencil depicts the “action,”
which it should be observed takes place on a hill.
 May-dew Dancers at Arthur’s-seat,
Edinburgh.
—————Strathspeys and reels,
Put life and metal in their heels.
Burns.
To the Editor of the Every-Day Book.
Edinburgh, April 20, 1826.
My Dear Sir,—Allow me, without preface, to acquaint you with a
custom of gathering the May-dew here on the first of May.
About four o’clock in the morning there is an unusual stir; a great
opening of area gates, and ringing of bells, and a “gathering” of folk
of all clans, arrayed in all the colours of the rainbow; and a hurrying
of gay throngs of both sexes through the King’s-park to Arthur’s-
seat.
In the course of half an hour the entire hill is a moving mass of
all sorts and sizes. At the summit may be seen a company of bakers,
and other craftsmen, dressed in kilts, dancing round a Maypole. On
the more level part “next door,” is usually an itinerant vender of
whiskey, or mountain (not May) dew, your approach to whom is
always indicated by a number of “bodies” carelessly lying across
your path, not dead, but drunk. In another place you may descry
two parties of Irishmen, who, not content with gathering the
superficial dew, have gone “deeper and deeper yet,” and fired by a
liberal desire to communicate the fruits of their industry, actively pelt
each other with clods.
These proceedings commence with the daybreak. The strong
lights thrown upon the various groups by the rising sun, give a
singularly picturesque effect to a scene, wherein the ever-varying
and unceasing sounds of the bagpipes, and tabours and fifes, et hoc
genus omne, almost stun the ear. About six o’clock, the appearance
of the gentry, toiling and pechin up the ascent, becomes the signal
for serving men and women to march to the right-about; for they
well know that they must have the house clean, and every thing in
order earlier than usual on May-morning.
About eight o’clock the “fun” is all over; and by nine or ten, were
it not for the drunkards who are staggering towards the “gude
town,” no one would know that any thing particular had taken place.
Such, my dear sir, is the gathering of May-dew. I subjoin a sketch
of a group of dancers, and
I am, &c.
P. P., Jun.

It is noticed in the “Morning Post” of the second of May, 1791,

that the day before, “being the first of May, according to annual and
superstitious custom, a number of persons went into the fields and
bathed their faces with the dew on the grass, under the idea that it
would render them beautiful.”
 May-dew was held of singular virtue in former times. Pepys on a
certain day in May makes this entry in his diary:—
“My wife away, down with Jane and W. Hewer to Woolwich, in
order to a little ayre, and to lie there to night, and so to gather May-
dew to-morrow morning, which Mrs. Turner hath taught her is the
only thing in the world to wash her face with; and” Pepys adds, “I
am contented with it.” His “reasons for contentment” seem to appear
in the same line; for he says, “I (went) by water to Fox-hall, and
there walked in Spring-garden;” and there he notices “a great deal
of company, and the weather and garden pleasant: and it is very
pleasant and cheap going thither, for a man may go to spend what
he will, or nothing—all as one: but to hear the nightingale and other
birds; and here a fiddler, and there a harp; and here a jew’s-trump,
and here laughing, and there fine people walking, is mighty
diverting,” says Mr. Pepys, while his wife is gone to lie at Woolwich,
“in order to a little ayre, and to gather May-dew.”

Gerard’s Hall Maypole.

Basing Lane.
Whence this lane derived its name of Basing, Stow cannot tell. It
runs out of Bread-street, and was called the Bakehouse, but,
“whether meant for the king’s bakehouse, or bakers dwelling there,
and baking bread to serve the market in Bread-street, where the
bread was sold, I know not,” says Stow; “but sure I am, I have not
read of Basing or of Gerard, the gyant, to have any thing there to
doe.”
It seems that this Maypole was fabled to have been “the justing
staff of Gerard, a gyant.” Stow’s particulars concerning it, and his
account of Gerard’s-hall, which at this time is an inn for Bath and
West of England coaches and other conveyances, are very
interesting. He says, “On the south side of this (Basing) lane is one
great house, of old time builded upon arched vaults, and with arched
gates of stone, brought from Cane in Normandie; the same is now a
common ostrey for receit of travelers, commonly and corruptly called
Gerard’s-hall, of a gyant said to have dwelled there. In the high
roofed hall of this house, sometime stood a large Firre-Pole, which
reached to the roofe thereof, and was said to be one of the staves
that Gerard the gyant used in the warres, to runne withall. There
stood also a ladder of the same length, which (as they said) served
to ascend to the top of the staffe. Of later yeeres this hall is altered
in building, and divers roomes are made in it. Notwithstanding, the
pole is removed to one corner of the hall, and the ladder hanged
broken upon a wall in the yard. The hosteler of that house said to
mee, the pole lacked half a foote of forty in length. I measured the
compasse thereof, and found it fifteene inches. Reason of the pole
could the master of the hostery give me none, but bade mee reade
the Chronicles, for there he heard of it. Which answer,” says Stow,
“seemed to me insufficient: for he meant the description of Britaine,
for the most part drawne out of John Leyland, his commentaries
(borrowed of myselfe) and placed before Reynes Wolfe’s Chronicle,
as the labours of another.” It seems that this chronicle has “a
chapter of gyants or monstrous men—of a man with his mouth
sixteene foote wide, and so to Gerard the gyant and his staffe,”
which Stow speaks of as “these fables,” and then he derives the
house called Gerard’s-hall, from the owner thereof, “John Gisors,
maior of London, in the yeere 1245,” and says, “The pole in the hall
might bee used of old time (as then the custome was in every
parish) to bee set up in the summer, a Maypole, before the principall
house in the parish or streete, and to stand in the hall before the
scrine, decked with hollie and ivie at the feast of Christmas. The
ladder served for the decking of the Maypole, and reached to the
roof of the hall.”
To this is added, that “every mans house of old time was decked
with holly and ivie in the winter, especially at Christmas;” whereof,
gentle reader, be pleased to take notice, and do “as they did in the
old time.”

We think we remember something about milkmaids and their

garlands in our boyish days; but even this lingering piece of
professional rejoicing is gone; and instead of intellectual pleasures at
courts, manly games among the gentry, the vernal appearance every
where of boughs and flowers, and the harmonious accompaniment
of ladies’ looks, all the idea that a Londoner now has of May-day, is
the dreary gambols and tinsel-fluttering squalidness of the poor
chimney-sweepers! What a personification of the times;—paper-
gilded dirt, slavery, and melancholy, bustling for another penny!
Something like celebrations of May-day still loiter in more remote
parts of the country, such as Cornwall, Devonshire, and
Westmoreland; and it is observable, that most of the cleverest men
of the time come from such quarters, or have otherwise chanced
upon some kind of insulation from its more sophisticated common-
places.—Should the subject come before the consideration of any
persons who have not had occasion to look at it with reference to
the general character of the age, they will do a great good, and
perhaps help eventually to alter it, by fanning the little sparks that
are left them of a brighter period. Our business is to do what we
can, to remind the others of what they may do, to pay honours to
the season ourselves, and to wait for that alteration in the times,
which the necessity of things must produce, and which we must
endeavour to influence as genially as possible in its approach.[153]

From Mr. Leslie’s pencil, there is a picture of May-day, “in the old
time”—the “golden days of good queen Bess”—whereon a lady,
whose muse delights in agreeable subjects, has written the following
descriptive lines:—
 On May Day.
By Leslie.
Beautiful and radiant May,
Is not this thy festal day?
Is not this spring revelry
Held in honour, queen, of thee?
’Tis a fair: the booths are gay,
With green boughs and quaint display
Glasses, where the maiden’s eye
May her own sweet face espy;
Ribands for her braided hair,
Beads to grace her bosom fair;
From yon stand the juggler plays
With the rustic crowd’s amaze;
There the morris-dancers stand,
Glad bells ringing on each hand;
Here the Maypole rears its crest,
With the rose and hawthorn drest;
And beside are painted bands
Of strange beasts from other lands.
In the midst, like the young queen,
Flower-crowned, of the rural green,
Is a bright-cheeked girl, her eye
Blue, like April’s morning sky,
With a blush, like what the rose
To her moonlight minstrel shows;
Laughing at her love the while,—
Yet such softness in the smile,
As the sweet coquette would hide
Woman’s love by woman’s pride.
Farewell, cities! who could bear
All their smoke and all their care,
All their pomp, when wooed away
By the azure hours of May?
Give me woodbine, scented bowers
Blue wreaths of the violet flowers,
Clear sky, fresh air, sweet birds, and trees,
Sights and sounds, and scenes like these!
L. E. L.
Northampton May Garland.
 Northampton May Garland.
To the Editor of the Every-Day Book.
Northampton, April, 1826.
Sir,—Having received much information from your Every-Day
Book, I shall be very happy to afford any that I may be able to
glean; but my means are extremely limited. I however mention a
custom at Northampton on the first of May, with some hope that I
am not troubling you with a “twice-told tale.”
 The girls from the neighbouring villages of Kingsthorpe, &c. on
the morning of May-day, come into the town with May garlands,
which they exhibit from house to house, (to show, as the inhabitants
say, what flowers are in season,) and usually receive a trifle from
each house. The garland is composed of two hoops crossing each
other vertically, and covered with flowers and streamers of various
coloured ribands; these are affixed to a staff about five feet long by
which it is carried, and in each of the apertures between the hoops
is placed a smartly dressed doll.
The accompanying sketch will convey some idea of the garland.
There are numerous streamers attached to it, of all the colours of
the rainbow. Should you think this notice worth inserting, I shall feel
obliged by your substituting any signature you please for my name,
which, agreeable to your request to correspondents who
communicate accounts of customs, &c., I subjoin.
I am, &c.
B. S. G. S.
The last Chimney Sweeper.
 The last Chimney Sweeper.
A large brush made of a number of small whalebone sticks, fastened into a round
ball of wood, and extending in most cases to a diameter of two feet, is thrust up
the chimney by means of hollow cylinders or tubes, fitting into one another like
the joints of a fishing rod, with a long cord running through them; it is worked
up and down, as each fresh joint is added, until it reaches the chimney pot; it is
then shortened joint by joint, and on each joint being removed, is in like manner
worked up and down in its descent; and thus you have your chimney swept
perfectly clean by this machine, which is called a Scandiscope.
 Some wooden tubes, a brush, and rope,
Are all you need employ;
Pray order, maids, the Scandiscope,
And not the climbing boy.

Copy of a printed hand-bill, distributed before May-day, 1826.

No May Day Sweeps.

CAUTION.
The inhabitants of this parish are most respectfully informed, that the United
Society of Master Chimney Sweepers intend giving their apprentices a dinner, at the
Eyre Arms [619, 620] St John’s Wood, on the first of May, instead of suffering
them to collect money as heretofore; the public are therefore cautioned against
encouraging in any way such collections, as they are too frequently obtained by
persons of the worst descriptions, or for the sinister purposes of their
employers.
N. B. The procession will start from the Bedford Arms, Charlotte-street, Bedford-
square, at eleven o’clock.

On Monday, the first of May, 1826, (pursuant to the above

notice,) the first anniversary dinner of the “United Society of Master
Chimney Sweepers,” took place at the Eyre tavern, St. John’s-wood,
Marylebone.
About eleven o’clock, two hundred of their apprentices proceeded
in great regularity through the principal streets and squares at the
west end of the town, accompanied by an excellent band of music.
The clean and wholesome appearance of the lads, certainly,
reflected much credit on their masters, and attracted crowds of
persons to the above tavern, where the boys were regaled with a
substantial repast of roast beef and plum-pudding; after which the
masters themselves sat down to a very excellent dinner provided for
the occasion.
On the cloth being removed, and the usual routine of loyal toasts
drank, the chairman addressed his brother tradesmen,
congratulating them on the formation of a society that was
calculated to do such essential service to the trade in general. It
would be the means of promoting the welfare of their apprentices,—
which was a feeling he was convinced every one of them had at
heart,—who, instead of being permitted to loiter and dance about
the streets on the first of May, dressed up in tawdry apparel, and
soliciting money, should in future be regaled with substantial fare on
each forthcoming day of the anniversary of the society, in order to
put an end to the degrading practice which had for such a length of
time stigmatized the trade. (Applause.)
“Success to the United Society of Chimney Sweepers,” having
been drank with thunders of applause,
Mr. Bennett, of Welbeck-street, addressed the company on the
subject of cleansing chimnies with the machine, the introduction of
which he was confident would never answer the intended purposes.
He urged the absolute necessity of employing climbing boys in their
trade; and instanced several cases in which the machines were
rendered perfectly useless: most of the chimnies in the great houses
at the west end of the town were constructed in such a manner that
it was utterly impossible to clear them of soot, unless a human being
was sent up for that purpose. He admitted that some houses had
chimnies which were built perpendicular; but even in those were
frequently to be met with what the trade called “cores,” which were
large pieces of mortar that projected out from the brick-work, and
that collected vast quantities of soot on their surface, so that no
machine could get over the difficulty. When the subject of the
climbing boys was before the house of lords, he (Mr. Bennett) was
sent for by the earl of Hardwicke, who was desirous of personally
ascertaining whether the practice of allowing boys to ascend
chimnies could be dispensed with entirely. He (Mr. Bennett) had
attended at his lordship’s residence with the machine, which was
tried in most of the chimnies in the house, but the experiment failed;
one of his apprentices having been ultimately obliged to ascend for
the purpose of extricating the machine from impediments which
were only to be surmounted by the activity of climbing boys. The
result was, that his lordship subsequently expressed his opinion that
the machines could never answer the purposes for which they were
originally intended, and therefore had his chimnies swept by the old
method. Mr. Bennett concluded by making some observations on the
harsh manner in which the trade had been aspersed. He said it had
been insinuated that their apprentices, in consequence of being
permitted to ascend chimnies, were often rendered objects for the
remainder of their lives. There were, he admitted, a few solitary
instances of accidents happening in their trade as well as in every
other. He now only wished that their opponents might have an
opportunity of witnessing the healthy and cheerful state in which
their apprentices were.
A master chimney-sweeper, with great vehemence of action and
manner, said, “I am convinced, Mr. Chairman, that it is a thing
impossible to do away with our climbing boys. For instance, look at
the duke of York’s fifty-one new chimnies. Let me ask any one of you
in company, is it possible a machine could be poked up any one of
them? I say, no; and for this reason—that most of them run in a
horizontal line, and then abruptly turn up, so that you see a machine
would be of no more use than if you were to thrust up an old
broomstick; and I mean to stick to it, that our opponents may as
well try to put down chimney-sweepers in the old way, as the
Equitable Loan Bank Company endeavoured to cut up the business
of the pawnbrokers. (Applause.) When I look round the table, (said
the speaker,) and see such respectable gentlemen on my right and
on my left, and in front of me, who dares to say that the United
Society of Master Chimney Sweepers are not as respectable a body
of tradesmen as any in London? and although, if I may be excused
the expression, there is not a gentleman now present that has not
made his way in the ‘profession,’ by climbing up chimnies. (There
was a universal nod of assent at this allusion.) Therefore, continued
the speaker, the more praise is due to us, and I now conclude by
wishing every success to our new society.” The above animated
address was received with the loudest plaudits.
Several other master chimney-sweepers addressed the company,
after which the ladies were introduced into the room, and dancing
commenced, which was kept up to a late hour.[154]
 On the first of May, 1807, the slave trade in the West Indies was
proscribed by the British parliament, and we see by the proceedings
at the Eyre tavern, St. John’s-wood, that on the first of May, 1826,
an effort was made to continue the more cruel black slavery of white
infants. Some remarks reported to have been made by these
gentlemen in behalf of their “black art,” require a word or two.
We are told that after the usual routine of loyal toasts, the
chairman congratulated his “brother tradesmen” on the formation of
a society that was calculated to do “essential service to the trade in
general.” There can be no doubt that “the king” was the first name
on their list of toasts, yet it happens that his majesty is at the head
of an association for abolishing their “trade.” The first names on the
roll of “The Society for suspending Climbing Boys by the use of the
Scandiscope,” are those of the “patron,” and the president, vice-
presidents, committee, and treasurer. These are chiefly prelates,
peers, and members of the house of commons; but the “patron” of
the society is “the king,” in opposition to whom, in the capacity of
“patron,” Mr. Bennett, the master-sweep, of Welbeck-street, urges
the “absolute necessity” of employing climbing boys. One of his
reasons is, that in some chimnies the bricklayers have “cores” of
mortar whereon the soot accumulates so that no machine can get
over the difficulty; but this only shows the “absolute necessity” of
causing the “cores” to be removed from chimnies already so
deformed, and of making surveyors of future houses responsible for
the expenses of alteration, if they suffer them to be so improperly
constructed. Mr. Bennett says, that lord Hardwicke was convinced
“the machines could never answer the purposes for which they were
originally intended, and therefore had his chimnies swept by the old
method.” If his lordship did express that opinion, it is in opposition to
the opinion of the king, as “patron,” the late bishop of Durham, the
present bishop of Oxford, the duke of Bedford, the lords Grosvenor,
Morley, Harrowby, Gwydir, Auckland, and other distinguished
individuals, who as president and vice-presidents of the society, had
better opportunities of determining correctly, than Mr. Bennett
probably afforded to earl Hardwicke.
 Another “master chimney-sweeper” is reported to have said,
“look at the duke of York’s fifty-one new chimnies:—most of them
run in a horizontal line, and then abruptly turn up, so that, you see,
a machine would be of no more use than if you were to thrust up an
old broomstick:” and then he asks, “who dares to say that the
United Society of Master Chimney Sweepers are not as respectable a
body of tradesmen as any in London?” and triumphantly adds, that
“there is not a gentleman now present that has not made his way in
the profession by climbing up chimnies.” To this “there was a
universal nod of assent.” But a universal admission by all “the
gentlemen present” that they had climbed to respectability by
climbing up chimnies, is of very little weight with those who observe
and know that willing slaves become the greatest and most effective
oppressors; and as to the duke of York’s new chimnies, it is not
credible his royal highness can be informed that the present
construction of his chimnies necessarily dooms unborn infants to the
certain fate of having the flesh torn from their joints before they can
sweep such chimnies. The scandalous default of a surveyor has
subjected the duke of York to the odium of being quoted as an
authority in opposition to a society for abolishing a cruel and useless
trade, wherein servitude is misery, and independence cannot be
attained but by the continual infliction of blows and torture on
helpless children. Yet as an act of parliament abated the frequency
of conflagrations, by empowering district surveyors to cause the
erection of party walls, so a few clauses added to the building act
would authorize the surveyors to enforce the building of future
chimnies without “cores,” and of a form to be swept by the
“Scandiscope.” Master chimney-sweepers would have no reason to
complain of such enactment, inasmuch as they would continue to
find employment, till the old chimnies and the prejudices in favour of
cruelty to children, disappeared by effluxion of time.

The engraving at the head of this article is altered from a

lithographic print representing a “Scandiscope.” Perhaps the machine
may be better understood from the annexed diagram. It simply
consists of a whalebone brush, and wooden cylinders strung on
rope, and put into action by the method described beneath the
larger engraving.

Mr. George Smart obtained two gold medals from the Society of
Arts for this invention. The names of the machine chimney-sweepers
in different parts of London may be obtained from Mr. Wilt, secretary
of the “Society for superseding Climbing Boys,” No. 125, Leadenhall-
street; the treasurer of the institution is W. Tooke, esq., F. R. S. Any
person may become a member, and acquaint himself with the easy
methods by which the machine is adopted to almost any chimney. As
the climbing chimney-sweepers are combining to oppose it, all
humane individuals will feel it a duty to inquire whether they should
continue willing instruments in the hands of the “profession” for the
extension of the present cruel practice.

The late Mrs. Montagu gave an annual dinner to the poor

climbing boys which ceased with her death.
 And is all pity for the poor sweeps fled,
Since Montagu is numbered with the dead?
She who did once the many sorrows weep,
That met the wanderings of the woe-worn sweep!
Who, once a year, bade all his griefs depart,
On May’s sweet morn would doubly cheer his heart!
Washed was his little form, his shirt was clean,
On that one day his real face was seen,
His shoeless feet, now boasted pumps—and new.
The brush and shovel gaily held to view!
The table spread, his every sense was charmed,
And every savoury smell his bosom warmed;
His light heart joyed to see such goodly cheer,
And much he longed to taste the mantling beer:
His hunger o’er—the scene was little heaven—
If riches thus can bless, what blessings might be given!
But, she is gone! none left to soothe their grief,
Or, once a year, bestow their meed of beef!
Now forth he’s dragged to join the beggar’s dance;
With heavy heart, he makes a slow advance,
Loudly to clamour for that tyrant’s good,
Who gives with scanty hand his daily food!
It is the interest of the “United Society of Master Chimney
Sweepers” to appear liberal to the wretched beings who are the
creatures of their mercy; of the variation and degrees of that mercy,
there is evidence before the committee of the house of commons.
Sympathy for the oppressed in the breast of their oppressors is
reasonably to be suspected. On the minutes of the “Society for
superseding Climbing Boys,” there are cases that make humanity
shudder; against their recurrence there is no security but the general
adoption of machines in chimnies—instead of children.

Mr. Montgomery’s “Chimney Sweeper’s Friend, and Climbing

Boys’ Album,” is a volume of affecting appeal, dedicated to the king,
“in honour of his majesty’s condescending and exemplary concern
for the effectual deliverance of the meanest, the poorest, and
weakest of British born subjects, from unnatural, unnecessary, and
unjustifiable personal slavery and moral degradation.” It contains a
variety of beautiful compositions in prose and verse: one of them
is—
The Chimney Sweeper.
Communicated by Mr. Charles Lamb,
from a very rare and curious little work,
Mr. Blake’s “Songs of Innocence.”
When my mother died I was very young,
And my father sold me, while yet my tongue
Could scarcely cry, “Weep! weep! weep!”
So your chimnies I sweep, and in soot I sleep.
There’s little Tom Toddy, who cried when his head,
That was curl’d like a lamb’s back, was shaved, so I said,
“Hush, Tom, never mind it for when your head’s bare,
You know that the soot cannot spoil your white hair.”
And so he was quiet, and that very night
As Tom was a sleeping, he had such a sight,
That thousands of sweepers, Dick, Joe, Ned, and Jack,
Were all of them locked up in coffins so black.
And by came an angel, who had a bright key,
And he opened the coffins, and set them all free;
Then down a green plain, leaping, laughing, they run,
And wash in a river, and shine in the sun,
Then naked and white, all their bags left behind,
They rise upon clouds, and sport in the wind;
And the angel told Tom, if he’d be a good boy
He’d have God for his father, and never want joy.
And so Tom awoke, and we rose in the dark,
And got with our bags and our brushes to work;
Though the morning was cold, Tom was happy and warm,
So if all do their duty they need not fear harm.

Dining with Duke Humphrey,

May Day Honours to Him.
In old St. Paul’s cathedral “within a proper chappel purposely
made for him,” and in a proper tomb, sir John Beauchamp, constable
of Dover, and warden of the cinque ports, was buried in the year
1358. “This deceased nobleman,” says Stow, “by ignorant people
hath been erroneously mistermed and said to be duke Humfrey, the
good duke of Gloucester, who lyeth honourably buried at Saint
Albans in Hartfordshire, twenty miles from London; in idle and
frivolous opinion of whom, some men, of late times, have made a
solemne meeting at his tombe upon Saint Andrewe’s day in the
morning (before Christmasse) and concluded on a breakfast or
dinner, as assuring themselves to be servants, and to hold diversity
of offices under the good duke Humfrey.”
Stow’s continuator says, “Likewise, on May-day, tankard bearers,
watermen, and some other of like quality beside, would use to come
to the same tombe early in the morning, and, according as the other,
deliver serviceable presentation at the same monument, by strewing
herbes, and sprinkling faire water on it, as in the duty of servants,
and according to their degrees and charges in office: but (as Master
Stow hath discreetly advised such as are so merrily disposed, or
simply profess themselves to serve duke Humfrey in Pauls) if
punishment of losing their dinners daily, there, be not sufficient for
them, they should be sent to St. Albans, to answer there for their
disobedience, and long absence from their so highly well deserving
lord and master, as in their merry disposition they please so to call
him.”
There can be no doubt that this mock solemnity on May-day, and
the feast of St. Andrew, on pretence of attending a festival in Paul’s,
on the invitation of a dead nobleman in another place, gave rise to
the saying concerning “dining with duke Humfrey.” It is still used
respecting persons who inquire “where shall I dine?” or who have
lost, or are afraid of “losing their dinners.”

Printers’ May Festival.

The following particulars of a very curious celebration is
remarkable, as being a description of the old mode of festivous
enjoyment, “according to order,” and the wearing of garlands by the
stewards, with “whifflers” in the procession.[155] It is extracted from
Randle Holme’s “Storehouse of Armory, 1688.”
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