Writing Portfolio: AI for self-guided

writing feedback
LENGUA B IV: INGLÉS
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María Escudero Sánchez

1. Writing Task 1: Complex Narrative Story.........................................................................2

2. Writing Task 2: Complex Narrative Story.........................................................................4

3. Writing Task 3: Complex Narrative Story.........................................................................7

4. Writing Task 4: Summary Task EPD 14.......................................................................... 10

5. Final Reflection...................................................................................................................12

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 1.​ Writing Task 1: Complex Narrative Story

In this first task, I had to continue a complex narrative story using about 150 words.

Original Version:

"You."

She stopped walking all of a sudden, dragging me back, as our arms were intertwined. I

wanted to look her in the eyes, but I couldn't even move one inch of my body after what I had

said.

"Actually..." She began. I was praying for all of this to be an unpleasant dream.

"I kind of knew that." She pulled a subtle smile with her lips, as if she had been waiting for a

long time for me to share my feelings.

I immediately wanted to vanish from the face of the earth. I had been acting like a fool for so

long that her words hit me like a ton of bricks. The silence was so loud I almost wished a

typhoon would appear out of nowhere just to escape the certainly uncomfortable situation.

However, just as I was still lost in thought, her soft hand gently grabbed my chin, pulling our

lips together.

“It’s not that hard, you see.” She giggled.

AI Feedback:

I asked the AI to correct my original version and give me suggestions on how to make it

better:

Most changes the machine suggested were related to a different way of expressing the same

idea. It changed some verbs for more accurate ones and reduced the number of words, as I

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had written some more than the number required. It also made changes in punctuation, such

as adding dashes and replacing the dots after the spoken words with commas.

I’ve followed some of these suggestions, mostly to make the final version a little shorter, as it

was my weakest point in this story. However, I’ve decided to ignore some advice regarding

the changes in style, because I am confident about mine and replacing the expressions I came

up with would be adopting the AI’s style.

Corrected Version:

"You."

She stopped walking suddenly, tugging me back, as our arms were intertwined. I wanted to

look her in the eyes, but I couldn't move one inch of my body after what I had said.

"Actually..." She began. I secretly prayed this was all an unpleasant dream.

"I kind of knew that." She pulled a subtle smile with her lips, as if she had been waiting for a

long time for me to say that.

I immediately wanted to vanish from the face of the earth. I had been acting like a fool for so

long that her words hit me like a ton of bricks. The silence was so loud I almost wished a

typhoon would appear out of nowhere just to escape the awkwardness pressing in.

However, just as I was still lost in thought, her soft hand gently grabbed my chin, pulling our

lips together.

“It’s not that hard, you see,” she giggled.

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 2.​ Writing Task 2: Complex Narrative Story

For the next writing task, I was required to continue a narrative story with no more than 150

words.

Original Version:

The room is as quiet as always, evoking a feeling of loneliness–yet quite satisfying. However,

I can feel the atmosphere getting heavier as time goes by, as if, deep down, I knew that John

wasn’t going to come back. This sensation isn’t new at all, but this time, curiosity is trying its

best to take control of my actions.

I slowly approach the door and take a look through the peephole with caution. No one at

sight. I instinctively try to turn the handle on the wide door, but a sudden feeling of guilt

crosses my mind: “is this the right thing to do?”

Nevertheless, I manage to shake it off and open the door without hesitation.

The house is empty. The tension in the air is dissipating, and at last, I realize what I can do:

escape this madness.

AI Feedback:

The AI corrected and enhanced my version, and it also offered some advice to improve the

story.

●​ Regarding nouns and adjectives, it corrected some collocations by replacing one

word with another, for example: “sense of loneliness” instead of “feeling”, or “take

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 control of me” instead of “my actions”. Some of the original adjectives and adverbs

have been changed, such as “quite”, replaced by “strangely”.

●​ It replaced some verbs for more accurate ones. For example: “the atmosphere is

growing heavier” instead of “getting”, “curiosity is trying its best” in place of

“doing”, “peer” instead of “take a look”, “reach for” to replace “try to turn” and “the

tension is lifting” in place of “dissipating”.

●​ It also changed some connectors, replacing “however” with “still” and “nevertheless”

with “despite the doubt”.

●​ The preposition in the phrase “no one at sight” has been corrected and replaced by

“in”, as well as “the handle on the wide door”, which has been changed from “on” to

“of”.

●​ Lastly, there are some phrases in the original story that have suffered big changes to

better catch the tone of the text, for example: from “a sudden feeling of guilt crosses

my mind” to “a wave of guilt washes me over”, and the phrase “manage to shake it

off” has been changed to “push the feeling aside”

●​ Punctuation has also been corrected in the second paragraph, when the narrator is

talking to herself. The AI removed the colon and put the following phrase in cursive

with a starting capital letter.

When correcting my version, I have decided to follow some of the advice the AI gave me,

because I thought that I could be more accurate for the tone that I was looking to create when

writing the story. I adapted some expressions and accurate verbs to enhance the story telling

and make it smoother to read. However, there are some corrections that I didn’t follow

because they were just the choice of the machine, so I did not want to change something I

consider irrelevant to understand the story and that it has nothing to do with it.

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Corrected Version:

The room is as quiet as always, evoking a sense of loneliness – yet strangely satisfying.

However, I can feel the atmosphere growing heavier as time goes by, as if, deep down, I

already knew that John isn’t going to come back. This sensation isn’t new at all, but this time,

curiosity is doing its best to take control of my actions.

I slowly approach the door and peer through the peephole with caution. No one in sight. I

instinctively reach for the handle on the wide door, but a wave of guilt washes over me. Is

this the right thing to do?

Nevertheless, I push the feeling aside and open the door without hesitation.

The house is empty, the tension in the air begins to lift, and at last, I realize what I can do:

escape this madness.

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 3.​ Writing Task 3: Complex Narrative Story

For this last complex narrative story, I decided to write about someone who doesn’t fit in the

environment they live in and their struggles to find a place in the world. I need between

240-260 words to complete it.

Original Version:

My heart is empty. Empty as a beggar’s stomach, as a liar’s promise. And though it has

always felt like this, I can’t help but wonder how my heart would have felt if you had always

been here, Father.

There are strangers in our halls. Faces of men who had long believed you were dead, hungry

for power as they dare to court Mother. I can’t stop myself from feeling utterly useless,

bearing witness to how these monsters destroy everything for which you have given blood,

sweat and tears. Their recklessness is far beyond limits, as they sit at our tables and carelessly

eat our food.

I’ve tried. Believe me, Father, I’ve tried. I’ve done everything in my power, but it appears to

these jackals that I don’t have any. They dismiss my words and mock my attempts to assert

authority. Never mind that you are my father. Never mind that I’m the heir.

Sometimes, I gaze at the starry sky late at night, trying to figure out what you look like.

Mother always tells me how alike we are, but her words go beyond my imagination: How

could I resemble a hero like you?

It has been twenty years since you left for war and for so long I’ve felt lost, stuck with the

stories of a man I don’t even know. If you are a complete mystery to me, how am I to uncover

my true self?

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AI Feedback:

For this story, the advice provided by the AI has been mostly about style and impact, for

example, making some phrases shorter to be more concise and impactful, or changing how

the ending was written to achieve a more solemn tone. However, as helpful as it has been, it

also suggested adding moments with specific actions or settings to give more context, which I

haven’t done for this one, as it has been quite daunting writing this story, and I don’t know

how to do it without changing most of the structures. Still, I will keep that in mind for a

future writing task in which further context has to be provided. As for this one, I consider the

content to be just fine.

Corrected Version:

My heart is empty. Empty as a beggar’s stomach, as a liar’s promise. And though it has

always felt like this, I can’t help but wonder how my heart would have felt if you had always

been here, Father.

There are strangers in our halls. Faces of men who had long believed you were dead, hungry

for power as they dare to court Mother. I can’t stop myself from feeling utterly useless,

bearing witness to how these monsters destroy everything for which you have given blood,

sweat and tears. Their recklessness is far beyond limits, as they sit at our tables and carelessly

eat our food.

I’ve tried. Believe me, Father, I’ve tried. I’ve done everything in my power, but it appears to

these jackals that I don’t have any. They dismiss my words and mock my attempts to assert

authority. Never mind that you are my father. Never mind that I’m the heir.

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Sometimes, late at night, I gaze at the starry sky, trying to imagine your face. Mother always

tells me how alike we are, but her words stretch beyond my understanding: How could I

resemble a hero like you?

It has been twenty years since you left for war, and for so long I’ve felt lost – stuck with the

stories of a man I’ve never known. If you are a complete mystery to me, how am I to discover

who I truly am?

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 4.​ Writing Task 4: Summary Task EPD 14

For the final task of the portfolio, we were asked to write a summary about the dangers and

discomforts of mountain biking in the Pyrenees. The text must be written in between 50 and

70 words.

Original Version:

Please beware of the following risks when going mountain biking in the Pyrenees: Routes

tend to be long and downward-sloping, which can cause sore muscles and injuries from

falling. Climate conditions in summer entail cool, humid weather and elevated temperatures,

the perfect recipe for sunburn and dehydration. Lastly, bear in mind that the rocky condition

of the terrain is likely to cause punctures.

AI Feedback:

Initially, the AI corrected my summary by adding information about the solutions to the risks

that I had mentioned in my original version. So, after clarifying what the content of the

summary had to be, it offered a smoother version, but with some details that were not

necessary in the context of the summary, as it should stick to the information that it is

required to provide. However, in spite of using many of the words that I used in my version,

the vocabulary used in its summary was more distinctive from the original text than mine.

That is why I decided to make some changes but sticking to the original structure that I used.

Corrected Version:

Please beware of the following risks when going mountain biking in the Pyrenees: Primarily,

routes tend to be long and downward-sloping, which can strain the upper body muscles and

increase the chances of falling. Additionally, climate conditions in summer entail cool, humid

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weather and elevated temperatures, the perfect recipe for sunburn and dehydration. Lastly,

bear in mind that the rocky condition of the terrain is likely to cause punctures.

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 5.​ Final Reflection

After completing all the tasks required with the useful advice from the AI, I have come to a

very interesting conclusion:

I understand that, as college students, the use of AI can be tempting, especially to complete

tasks without wanting to think too much or to avoid “wasting time” doing our homework, but

through this portfolio, I’ve realized that AI can be a valuable learning tool when it is used

properly.

I did not like using AI too much and, in spite of those who encouraged me to use it more

often, I never did. I consider myself to be quite creative, so my view was quite radical

towards AI: It was taking away our creativity. However, I can now see how it can actually

help enhance someone’s creativity.

The main issue with AI is that people tend to ask for the answer to everything, and depending

completely on a machine is not only detrimental for their brain development, it also affects

the capacity of thinking by themselves. People who recklessly use AI for everything are

turning into slaves of technology, leaving their critical and rational thinking behind.

That is exactly why we must be sensible when being helped by AI, just as this portfolio has

shown me: the machine can help us improve, but we must make use of our critical thinking to

analyse the response, take what resonates and leave what does not.

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