managing

at work
 Difficult People & Situations
Scenario 1: A colleague
who demands you to do his
part of the job without
pay/credit

Scenario 2: your team

members are constantly
Scenario 3: your
Boss constantly fighting, lowering team
criticizes you, never productivity and morale
gives credit
 Who are Difficult People?

• Negative Attitude and behaviour

• Unpredictable

• Major reasons- power, personality factors,

behavioural patterns, person- job misfit
How we react?

DENIAL

ATTACK

IGNORE
• Selfish, not considerate of others needs
• Never thinks that the project in hand will succeed The anatomy
• Spends majority of time criticizing others
• ‘Misery loves company’ is the moto
• Shy away from taking risks (comfort zone)
• Focus too much on negative
• Secretive to important information
• Suffer from mood swings
• Frequently take control, seek opportunity to make a mess, quick to
blame others
• Impulsive decision makers, usually make wrong decision (sometimes on
purpose)
 Self- Examination
• Are you obsessed with negative thoughts?
• Do you have trouble with authority figures?
• Are you determined to make people see everything ‘your way’?
• Are you always looking for others weaknesses?
• Do you have trouble focusing on the whole project as a success, instead look for
little pockets of trouble?
• Do you think about world events and feel things will never get better?
• Do you drift from job to job and expect more in future?
• Do you think yourself as a loser?
• Are you rarely happy?
 Intimidates, Frightens, Display Charming/Equal-opportunity
Anger, Silent treatment (Negative BULLY: No sense of
Disrespectful, Insulting, Rude, Play Embarrassment
Attitude & Behaviour) by Dual Rules (unpredictable)

Narcissist, “Its all about me” Low morale, Interpersonal

Conflict Confrontation, Ask for HELP!
 PESSIMISTIC:
CONVERSATIONS ARE
COMPLAINTS

Complain as an Attack:
‘I cant afford a dry clean like
you’
Complain as a victim: TIME AND ENERGY
‘You isolated me’ CONSUMING

NOT DOERS

NOTICE THE
UNNOTICABLE
 NOT ASKS FOR
DEPENDABLE MORE TIME
TRIES TO BE WASTES TIME IN
MAKING EXCUSES
PERFECT

PLANNING
VS
EXECUTION CREATES
INEQUITY
 DON’T RESPECT
BOUNDARIES, RUDE,
Intruding

DON’T ASK FOR

HELP!

Act Self-Importantly: How

dare you question my
Act IMPATIENT: decision?
interruption
 THE MANIPULATOR
Artful Bully Respond
Strongly

Ulterior Can’t take Confrontation

Transaction ‘NO’
 THE SILENT TYPE

SILENCE IS NOT
ALWAYS GOLDEN ONE TO ONE
INTERACTION

15
ZONES-OUT MINUTES
OF FAME
GRAPEVINE IS
UNREACHABLE
 EXIT
THE OVERLY Approach:
SENSETIVE TYPE Likely to Quit

Not
Leadership
material

Self-centered:
Difficult to
no association
anticipate
with
Why ‘UPSET’
Organization
Goals
Take
CRITISIZM
to heart and “Quitting is NOT an option”
MAGNIFY
 Essential for Healthy
Workplace

Know too much

Negaholic Radar:
Productivity Suffers Good Fit with Silent, Overly Sensitive & Rookie Not 100% reliable

creativity suffers due

to over socializing

Ignorance towards
‘Workplace Conduct’
conduct
The Impatient Person
• Type A
• Think about future
• Never enjoy present
• Always Hurry: Make mistakes, Meet
accidents, Interrupt people
SOLUTION • Take more than they can handle
• Ask to slow down • Others feel pushed
• Make them repeat
• Remind importance of making minimum mistakes
• Help make realistic deadlines
The Overly Nice
• Overly Warm
• Unpredictable
• Not Dependable
• Dual faced
• Fear to share personal view
 The Stubbornness Dragon
• Resist Change
• Upset during any
change
• Say no without
listening

• Don’t surprise
• Roadblock to
• Never make
innovation, create
havoc sudden demands,
give options
• They are counter
• Be calm, ask for
dependent
towards authority inputs on issues
Self-Deprecation Person
• Constant fear of failing or being embarrassed
• Don’t volunteer for assignments
• Feel unworthy, feel responsible for things that are
not their fault, become defensive when
questioned
• Unnecessarily apologize
• Solution: point out their strengths, thank for
contribution, don’t let engage in self-deprecating
talk, never humiliate publicly
• Approach: Support and Respect
The Joker
Consumes work time with
unwanted ‘HUMOR’

Solution: The ‘Reward Principle’

 recap- the ‘Negaholics’
1. Bully- aggressive, intimidating, different rules, (generally charming)
2. Know-it-all Type- act self-important, impatient, less respect for others space
3. Complainer/whiner- negative tone, not doers, notice the unnoticeable
4. Manipulator- artful bully, use of ulterior transactions in communication
5. Procrastinator- difficulty in translating from planning to execution stage
6. Silent type- discourage communication, loners
7. Social butterfly- ignore code of conduct, performance suffers due to over socializing
8. The overly sensitive person- Unpredictable, magnify criticism, self-centered
9. The Joker- Clown who suck working energy by his irrelevant humor
10. The ‘Impatient Person’- prone to mistakes and accidents
11. The Overly Nice: Unpredictable, too sweet, lack real interactions
12. The Stubbornness Dragon- resist change, counter dependent to authority
13. Self-Deprecation Person- constant fear of failing, feel unworthy
 TIPS: Dealing with negative aspect of other

• If someone is in ‘attack mode’, or excess defensiveness, recognize that

it is useless to argue at that moment

• Don’t push, situation might get worse

• If other is under stress, deal with that later or change mode of discussion

• Don’t allow yourself to be verbally abused

• If difficult person is your boss, reconsider finding job elsewhere

 TIPS: Dealing with negative aspect of self

• Learn to recognize and accept your defense mechanisms, realize that

you are not being attacked

• When defensive don’t react quickly

• Learn how to listen when someone asks a question or makes a

suggestion

• Consider good ideas, even if you don’t like the person

• Learn to understand your personality, strengths and weaknesses