CONCISE WRITING

Concise writing means

clear writing!
Less is more??
 Shakespeare said “Brevity is the soul of
wit.”
 What does this mean?
 It means that you sound more intelligent by
speaking/writing in simple and direct
language as opposed to running off at the
mouth (or pen).
What is this person trying to say?
 I mean, the question of whether to exist at all,
or on the other hand, to take your life into your
own hands, and decide to end it all—well,
that’s a really important question, maybe the
most important question of all.
 To be or not to be, that is the question

Shakespeare, Hamlet, 3.1.64

 I am in possession of a
vision in my imagination,
one that I hope might come
true one day, but for now
is only a nocturnal fantasy.
 “I have a dream.”

Martin Luther King Jr.

Speech at Washington DC
August 28, 1963.
 Therefore once all is said and done, I want you as
my fellow citizens of the United States of
America, when you think about our nation and its
future, to ask yourselves how you can help each
other and our country to be great, not just to
wonder about what is in it for you as individuals.
 “And so, my fellow Americans, ask not what your
country can do for you; ask what you can do for
your country.” JFK inaugural address Jan 20,
1961.
Writing Concise Sentences
 Often people use too many words.
 When writing always use as few
words as you can get away with.
 HOWEVER, never sacrifice content
for the sake of conciseness.
No wonder he’s Einstein!
 Albert Einstein: "If you can't explain
something simply, you don't understand
it well."
 Albert Einstein: "Most of the fundamental
ideas of science are essentially simple, and
may, as a rule, be expressed in language
comprehensible to everyone."
 Albert Einstein: "Any fool can make things
bigger, more complex, and more violent. It
takes a touch of genius--and a lot of courage--
to move in the opposite direction."
 Leonardo da Vinci: "Simplicity is the
ultimate sophistication."
 Thomas Jefferson: "The most valuable of all
talents is that of never using two words when
one will do."
 Samuel Johnson: "Do not accustom yourself
to use big words for little matters."
A small comparison chart
 Superfluous words  Better English
 on account of the fact that  Since, because
 in order to  To
 at the present time now  Now
 on the occasion of when  When
 it is apparent therefore  Thus, because
REDUNDANCY, redundancy
 Did someone say redundancy?
 People are masters of adding extra words that
do not add any new information to what was
said!
 For example: The flower was red in colour.
 How else would it be red?
 Let’s just say “The flower was red.”
Redundancy? Redundant!
 INSTEAD OF SAYING THIS…  SAY THIS…
 added bonus  bonus
 arrived at the conclusion  concluded
 ask the question  ask
 surrounded on all sides  surrounded
 in the event that  If
 costs a total of…  Costs
 Honest truth  truth
 Am I being redundant?
 Hot water heater  Water heater
 Large in size  Large
 Personally responsible  Responsible
 Postpone until later  Postpone
 Separate apart  Separate
 Temporary loan  Loan
 Warn in advance  Warn
 New breakthrough  breakthrough
Avoid Intensifiers that Don’t intensify!
 Avoid using words such as really, very, quite,
extremely, severely when they are not
necessary.
 Saying that your new salary increase is
inadequate is probably good enough to get the
point across.
 Does saying that it is extremely inadequate
prove your point any more?
But I like saying “very”…
 You don’t have to banish
these words entirely from
your lexicon!
 Just know that a lot of the
time they are not needed.
In short, treat them like
garlic or salt—using
them sparingly produces
more of an impact.
 As a matter of fact, the local television station
which is situated in the local area wins a great
many awards in the final analysis because of
its type of coverage of all kinds of
controversial issues.
 The local television station wins many awards
for its coverage of controversial issues.
Empty Openers.
 There is…
 There are…
 There is a tendency for young people to go out
on week-ends
 CHANGE TO: young people often go out on
week-ends.
 There are sixteen instructors who teach in the
COMM department.
 Sixteen instructors teach in the COMM
department.
 “IT”
 People love to use the
word “it.” BUT using
“it” is a horrible way to
write!
 Why? Well, “it” is
vague. And “it” allows
for empty-opener
sentences.
EXAMPLE: It is necessary for students to fill in
both questionnaires.
CHANGE TO: Students must fill in both
questionnaires
“It is” is a disease!!! Avoid “it is!”
 EXAMPLE: As difficult as it is to imagine, it
is possible to catch a bird.
 CHANGE TO: Catching a bird is possible.
Filthy Nasty it constructions: It/By,
If/It
 EX: If you leave the door open, it will waste too
much energy.
 REWRITE: Leaving the door open wastes too
much energy.
 EX: By talking on the phone, it will decrease your
chances of meeting people.
 REWRITE: Talking on the phone will decrease
your chances of meeting people.
Other ways to make concise
sentences…
 Shortening clauses is one way to make
writing more concise. Please consider…
 The Titanic, which was a huge ocean
liner, sank in 1912.
 The Titanic, a huge ocean liner, sank in
1912.
 The scientists held a memorial
service for the passengers and crew
who had drowned.
 The scientists held a memorial
service for the drowned passengers
and crew.
STRONG LIKE A VERB!
 Action verbs are strong verbs!
 Be and have are weak verbs that often lead to
wordy sentences!
 When you revise weak verbs to strong verbs
you can increase the impact of your writing
and reduce the number of words in your
sentences.
 FOR EXAMPLE: The plan before the city council
has to do with tax rebates
 CHANGE TO: The plan before the city council
proposes tax rebates.
 FOR EXAMPLE: The board members were of the
opinion that the changes in the rules were changes
they would not accept.
 CHANGE TO: The board members said that they
would not accept changes to the rules.
Replace a Phrase with a VERB!
 I am envious of your English skills
 Change to: I envy your English skills.
 Your skill is illustrative of an immense talent.
 Change to: Your skill illustrates talent.
 The building had the appearance of having
been neglected
 Change to: The building appeared to have been
neglected.
Is because…
 “Is” and “because” should never appear side by
side! This is simply bad grammar.
 Example: The reason they are so eager to sell
tickets is because they want to pay for a new
arena.
 Change to: They are eager to sell tickets,
because they want to pay for a new arena.