do_this and die();

Nov 18, 20130 likes1,983 views

Various coding styles I hate seeing. It's a rant, but a fun one. Uses Spiderman to help illustrate my angst. This talk was originally given at Cluj.pm, on November 7th, 2013.

I WILL KILL YOU
AKA, do_this() and die;
AKA, things that piss me off

Sawyer X ( @PerlSawyer )

WORDS OF CAUTION
TIMTOWTDI
Your mileage may vary
No batteries included
Don't drink and drive
And lastly...

REALLY STUPID STUFF
$ , $ ,$ , $ , $ , $ , $ , $
a b i j k l m n
$,$,$,$, $,$,$
f u c k y o u
Trailing spaces STOP IT!
$a,@ra,%ah
vr ary hs

TABS VS. SPACES
The eternal struggle
Do not mix tabs and spaces
Do NOT mix tabs and spaces
DO NOT mix tabs and spaces
DO NOT MIX TABS AND SPACES!
Best rule? No tabs, only spaces

$MISUNDERSTANDINGS m pwithout checking value a #mpEP,IT a XRLS m %gs =mp+ $ = $is$}'g' ) ky %is y ae a ( _ > kd{_{ae} , es kd; #mpBOKLS a LC IT m @otd=mp {$-[] y sre a _>0 } sr {$-[]<>$-[] } ot a>1 = b>1 mp {[$,ceku(_ ]}@ie; a _ hcsm$) szs C-style f rf r a h o/ oec #frfrahLS o/oec IT m @is=q<en jf jh jci jmjh ja jn jd js> y kd wjny ef on ake i on on ue ue oh; fr(m $ =0 $ <@is $+ ){ o y i ; i kd; i+ sy">$is$]; a - kd[i" } frahm $i (kd){ oec y kd @is sy">$i" a - kd; } sy">$"fr@is a - _ o kd;$

SWITCHES
i
f
(oe
$n) {.}
..
esf(to
li $w) {.}
..
esf(tre {.}
li $he) ..
es
le
{.}
..
m %ipth=(
y dsac
$n
oe = sb{.}
> u ..,
$w
to = sb{.}
> u ..,
$he = sb{.}
tre > u ..,
)
;
i (eit $ipth$nu}){
f
xss dsac{ipt
$ipth$nu}>..;
dsac{ipt-(.)
}es {.}
le ..

EMPTY IF CLAUSE
i (smtig {
f $oehn)
#d ntig
o ohn
}es {
le
#teata wr
h cul ok
}

$RETURN VARIABLES m $eun y rtr; i (ti){ f $hs .. . $eun='hs; rtr ti' }esf(aohrtig { li $nte_hn) .. . $eun='ht; rtr ta' } rtr $eun eun rtr;$

GOTO HELL;
NOT FOR WORKFLOW!
#Clbljms
ae up
gt HL;
oo EL
#smweees
oehr le
HL:
EL
cniu_BxCascd(;
otneDI_ls_oe)
#oerdstecretfaei tesak
vrie h urn rm n h tc
#go,we ncsay
od hn eesr
gt &yfnto;
oo m_ucin

WHY?
Because code is alive and grows
Sometimes to ridiculous age
You might not be the last
And the next might know your address

You are the air beneath my wings
You are the sunlight in my garden
And I am happy you are here

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